Second Chances

Series: Second Chances
Author: Princess Joyce
Rating: PG-13 or T for this chapter

A/N: You need to have seen the episodes ‘Surprise’ and ‘Innocence’ and seen previous episodes for this to make sense.


Chapter 6: Surprised Innocence

Buffy tossed and turned in her bed, trying to catch that elusive bit of sleep that she craved. Giving up, she turned her lamp on and let out a sigh. Felling thirsty, she took the empty glass from her bedside table to the bathroom to get more water.

As she walked down the small hall toward her bathroom, she felt as if someone was watching her, but felt strangely calm about it. She opened the door and stepped out into the Bronze. Buffy knew something wasn’t right, but she didn’t feel like thinking it through.

She found Willow sitting at a table with a large cup of cappuccino and an organ grinder's monkey.

“L'hippo a pique' ses pantalons,” she said to the monkey.

The monkey squeaked. Buffy walked up to the table and looked at Willow curiously. The red head smiled at her and waved. Buffy raised her hand back.

She continued on and found her mother holding a large cup and saucer.

Joyce saw Buffy coming, and turned to face her.

“Do you really think you're ready, Buffy?” Her mom asked.

“What?” Buffy asked.

Joyce dropped the saucer and it shattered on the floor. Buffy looked up to see her mom walking away.

She walked past Willow again and through the crowd to the empty stage. Turning, she saw Angel and smiled.

He smiled back and started toward her.

A vamped out Drusilla suddenly appeared behind Angel. She stabbed a stake into his back and pulled it out. He arched backward in pain.

“ANGEL!” Buffy yelled

They reached out for each other, but before they could touch, his hand began to disintegrate. The rings on his fingers fell to the floor. His body didn't explode like most vampires', but just crumbled to dust.

“Happy Birthday, Buffy,” Drusilla said in her strange, distracted way.

Buffy looked up to see Spike in the corner with a hand over his eyes.

“I can’t help what I can’t see,” he muttered taking a drag on his cigarette.

Buffy sat up in bed with a gasp. A nightmare. That’s all…

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Buffy felt overwhelmed as she walked to school after leaving Angel’s. That dream had seemed so real, and Buffy had dashed over to Angel’s, needing to see with her own eyes that he wasn’t dust.

He wasn’t. He was tall, strong, and solid. She shivered at the memory of their bodies pressed together as they kissed. They had been dating for a while now. In Angel’s arms this morning it had hit her that she wanted him. She wanted him the way a woman wants a man. Kisses and groping were one thing, but Buffy wanted to be with Angel in a physical and full body sense. She felt ready. Maybe…

Buffy thought of Spike and his certainty that they would be together in the future. But this was the present, and she was with Angel. So why did she feel like she was betraying Spike? No. It wasn’t time for her and Spike yet. A part of her believed that time would never come. But a small part deep inside knew better.

Taking a deep breath, Buffy pushed aside her thoughts of Spike and Angel. It was time for school. Maybe Giles could help her sort out the dream.

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Angel had barely begun to drift off again before the pounding on his door started again. He was smiling as he pushed himself out of bed again, believing that Buffy had returned for more kisses and maybe something a bit more than kisses…

He was shocked to find a blanket covered Spike on the other side of the door. The blonde vampire barreled passed him into the safe darkness of the room.

He removed the blanket and looked around, unimpressed.

“Hmm, even more fruity than I imagined,” he sneered distastefully.

Angel scowled at him, but didn’t throw him out no matter how much he wanted to.

“What do you want?” He demanded.

Spike shrugged and started examining things a bit closer.

“It’s so dark in here. Really, you should think about adding some color,” he commented picking up a small black statue.

“You came to give me decorating advice?” Angel asked, taking the statue from Spike and setting it carefully back in its place.

“No, I just came to…”

Spike stopped and looked at Angel hard, searching for something.

“What?” Angel asked, not enjoying the scrutiny.

Spike shook his head.

“I don’t really know why I came. I guess I just wanted to see you before…” he trailed off again and shook his head.

“Sorry, see you around,” Spike said wrapping the blanket around himself again.

“Wait, are you coming to Buffy’s party tomorrow night?” Angel asked in spite of his better judgement.

Spike shook his head.

“I’ll be there for her when it’s over though. Just remember that,” Spike promised.

Angel stared at the closed door in confusion. Sleep. He needed sleep.

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Rupert Giles stepped into the hall of Sunnydale High, books in hand as always. He searched the faces of the passing students until he found the one he was looking for.

“Oh, good morning. Is everything in order for the party?” He asked quietly.

Xander took a cautious look around. No Buffy, it was safe.

“Absolutely. You ready to get down, you funky party weasel?”

Giles looked at the stairs and saw Jenny and Buffy coming down.

“Here comes Buffy. Now remember: discretion is the better part of valor,” he said, importantly.

Rupert would never admit it, but he was rather excited about the ‘surprise party’ they were throwing for his slayer.

Xander gave him an impudent look.

“You coulda just said, 'shh!' God, are all you Brits such drama queens?”

Giles didn’t not get a chance to respond as Buffy and Jenny walked up.

“Buffy, I feel a pre-birthday spanking coming on,” Xander said, rubbing his hands together gleefully.

“I'd curb that impulse if I were you, Xander,” Jenny Calendar said, giving the teenage boy the evil eye as she followed Buffy to a table in the lounge.

“Check, cancel spanking,” he said in his coat as if he was speaking into a hidden microphone.

“You alright, Buffy? You seem a little fatigued,” Giles commented.

He knew that ignoring Xander was the quickest way to get him to settle down. Any encouragement and the boy would become quite a nuisance.

“Rough night. I had a dream that Drusilla was alive and she killed Angel. And Spike was there, refusing to watch and not doing anything. I-it just really freaked me out.”

“You fear it was more of a, a... a portent?

“See, I don't know. I don't wanna start a big freakout over nothing.”

“Still, best to be, uh, on the alert. If Drusilla is alive, i-i-it could be a fairly... cataclysmic state of affairs,” Giles said, hoping that this particular dream was not prophetic.

“Again, so many words! Couldn't you just say, 'we'd be in trouble'?” Xander demanded.

He knew it was stupid and annoying, but he’d rather see them all angry than scared any day.

“Go to class, Xander,” Giles commanded, sternly.

“Gone.”

He started to walk away, but then turned back.

“Notice the economy of phrasing: 'gone.' Simple. Direct.” He pointed at Giles and left.

“Maybe I should get 'gone', too,” Buffy said, standing up.

“Uh, don't worry unduly, Buffy. I-I-I'm sure it's nothing,” Giles said, hoping he sounded more reassuring than he felt.

“I know. I should keep my Slayer cool, but... its Angel, which automatically equals maxi-wig,” she admitted.

Giles just gave her a smile and watched her leave.

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Buffy was unusually quiet on patrol that night.

“Something wrong, luv?” Spike asked, after his recounting of that day’s ‘General Hospital’ episode. He couldn’t wait until ‘Passions’ would finally premiere.

“No. I’m just… I feel like I’m at the edge of some huge event. I just wish I knew what to expect,” she said, jabbing the toe of her tennis shoe in the ground.

Spike sighed.

“You’re the slayer, Buffy. You’re life is always packed with ‘big events’.”

Buffy looked up at him.

“I want you to tell me what happens next. I want to be prepared,” she stated, determinedly.

Spike looked at her uneasily.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea Buffy. Things have to happen, I can’t stop them all. You have to learn and grow, but you can’t do that if you always know what’s coming,” he said, gently.

Buffy sniffed, and he was surprised to see that she was crying.

“I-is Angel going to die?” She asked shakily.

Spike was doubly surprised by her question, but decided to play it cool.

“He’s a vampire, luv, he’s already dead,” he said, lightly.

Buffy suddenly pushed him up against the side of a crypt, her left arm along his collarbone and her right hand holding a stake over his heart.


“You know what I mean! Tell me that much at least. Is he?” She demanded.

Spike swallowed the bout of lust that had hit him hard at her dominating actions.

“Why? Would you stop it? Would you do anything to save your precious Angel?” He snarled.

Her face crumpled and she let her arms fall to her sides.

Just as Spike was about to apologize for being an ass, she turned and ran.

He didn’t follow. Spike just watched her go, and lit a cigarette. He’d behaved like a jealous idiot, but part of him didn’t care. It had been a long time since he’d had Buffy the way he wanted her. He wanted his Buffy! Not this whiny copy that crumbled when he’d needed a good fight.

And it was sickening the way she pined for his Sire. Angel could never love her they way she needed. No man would be able to give her what she wanted because she herself didn’t know. But Spike did. He’d give it to her… when the time was right.

He turned to go home, but decided to visit Willy’s bar. He hadn’t gotten good and pissed in a while now. It was about time.

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When Buffy woke the next morning, the first thing she noticed was the white rose on the pillow next to her head.

She sat up with a sleepy smile and reached for the note tucked under the flower.

Buffy,
Enjoy this day, you only turn seventeen once. Make a point to remember the nice things that happen to you today. Your mother’s smile, your friends’ laughter, and the delicious cake. (Save me some.) I was an ass last night, and I hope you won’t let anything I said ruin this day for you. You were right. You are on the edge of a big and life-changing event. This white rose represents your innocence, and scary though it may be, losing it is not as bad as you might think. I’m staying away again, but not out of fear of seeing my ex. I am afraid that I am not strong enough to watch you go through this, but I firmly believe that if I try to prevent what is to come I will be doing you more harm than good. If you don’t hate me when all is said and done, you know where to find me, my door is always open to you.

-Spike

PS: Angel will not be turning to dust anytime soon.

Buffy finished the note, tears of relief running down her face. She brought the rose up to her nose and inhaled the sweet scent.

“Thanks Spike,” she whispered, before drying her eyes and getting out of bed to begin her day.

Less than an hour later she was downstairs in the kitchen eating breakfast.

“Mall trip for your birthday on Saturday. Don't forget,” her mother said, taking a plate to the sink.

“Space on a mom-sponsored shopping opportunity? Not likely,” she said between bites of toast.

Joyce turned back to face her.

“Hmm. So, does, um, 17 feel any different than 16?”

“It's funny you should ask that. You know, I woke up feeling more responsible, mature and levelheaded,” Buffy commented sagely.

“Really? Tch. It's uncanny,” Joyce said, clearly not buying it.

“I now possess the qualities one looks for in a... licensed driver,” she said, giving her mom a hopeful look.

“Buffy...” Joyce warned.

“You said we could talk about it again when I was 17,” Buffy insisted.

“Do you really think you're ready, Buffy?”

She gave her mom a surprised look at the familiar statement and watched with a growing horror as Joyce dropped her plate. It shattered on the floor.

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“...and then my mom broke the plate. It was just like my dream. Every gesture, every word. It was so creepy,” Buffy explained, looking up at Giles for some kind of reassurance.

“Yes, well, I-I-I'd imagine it would be... fairly unnerving.”

They were interrupted by Xander and Willow who came bounding into the library with huge grins.

“Hey! It's the woman of the hour,” Xander called out as they made their way to the slayer.

“Its Happy Birthday Buffy!” Willow said, gleefully.

She jumped over to the table, hugged Buffy's shoulders and gave her a big smile. Buffy looked down and tucked her hair behind her ear.

“Not Happy Birthday Buffy?” The red head asked with a frown.

“I-it's just that, um, part of the nightmare that Buffy had the other night actually transpired,” Giles jumped in, hoping to save his slayer from recounting the unsettling events.

“Which means Drusilla might still be alive. Giles, in my dream, I couldn't stop her. She blindsided me. A-Angel was gone before I knew what happened,” Buffy couldn’t keep the fear out of her voice, despite Spike’s note that Angel would live.

“Even if she is alive, uh, we can still protect Angel. Dreams aren't prophecies, Buffy. Y-y-y-you dreamt that the Master had risen, but you stopped it from happening,” Giles reminded her.

“You ground his bones to make your bread,” Xander quipped, desperately trying to infuse whatever humor he could into the situation.

“That's true. Except for the bread part. Okay, so, fine. We're one step ahead, but I wanna stay that way,” Buffy announced, standing up.

“Absolutely. Let me read up on Drusilla, uh, see if she has any particular patterns. Why don't you meet me here at 7:00? We'll map out a strategy,” Giles said, already opening a book.

“What am I supposed to do until then?” She asked.

“Go to classes, do your homework, have supper...” he suggested.

“Right. Be *that* Buffy.”

She grabbed her bag and headed out of the library.

“Well, that's not a perky birthday puppy,” Xander frowned pointing at her.

“So much for our surprise party. I bought little hats and everything,” Willow lamented

“Mm-hm,” Xander agreed

“Oh, well. I guess I'll tell Cordelia,” she said.

“No, you won't. We're having a party tonight,” Giles insisted.

“Looks like Mr. Caution Man, but the sound he makes is funny,” Xander said, staring at Giles like he’d never seen him before.

Willow frowned and nodded in agreement.

“Buffy's surprise party will go ahead as we planned. Except I won't be wearing the little hat.”

“But Buffy and Angel...” Willow protested.

“May well be in danger... as they have been before, and, I imagine, will be again. One thing I've learned in my tenure here on the Hellmouth is that there is no good time to relax. And Buffy's turning seventeen just this once, and she deserves a party,” Giles declared.

“You're a great man of our time,” Xander told him with real respect.

“And anyway, Angel's coming. So she'll be able to protect him *and* have cake,” Willow said with a smile

“Precisely.”

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“Is it really true?” Spike asked, hopefully.

“It's really true,” Angelus answered him with a laugh.

“You've come home,” Drusilla said with a gleeful smile.

“No more of this 'I've got a soul' crap?” Spike asked, following behind Angelus in his wheelchair.

“What can I say, hmm? I was going through a phase,” Angelus said, lighting a cigarette.

“This is great! This is so great!” Spike shouted, happy for the first time in a while.

“Everything in my head is singing! We're family again. We'll feed. Grrr. And we'll play.” Drusilla said, pleased to have her Sire back.

“I've got to tell you, it made me sick to my stomach seeing you being the Slayer's lap dog,” Spike said with a laugh.

Angelus growled and grabbed Spike by the shirt. Then kissed him on the forehead and stepped back.

The three laughed.

“How did this happen?” Dru asked.

“You wouldn't believe me if I told you,” Angelus said taking a puff on the cigarette.

“Oh, who cares? What matters is now he's back! Now it's four against one, which are the kind of odds I like to play,” Spike said with a smile.

Drusilla leaned toward Angelus.

“Psst. We're going to destroy the world. Want to come?”

“Yeah. Destroying the world. Great. I'm really more interested in the Slayer,” Angelus said, playing with his cigarette.

“Well, she's *in* the world, so that should work out,” Spike said, slowly.

“Give me tonight. Hmm?” Angelus asked, flipping the cigarette to the ground.

“What do you mean?” Spike asked, suspicious.

“Lay low for a night. I guarantee you by the time you go public she won't be anything resembling a threat.”

“You've really got a yen to hurt this girl, haven't you?”

“She made me feel like a human being. That's not the kind of thing you just forgive.”

Spike sat up in bed panting. The dream/memory was so real he swore he could still smell Dru’s perfume.

He hopped out of bed and danced a little jig just to reassure himself that his legs were fine. Sighing he looked at the clock. It was almost dusk, Buffy would soon be discovering that her Angel was gone.

“Please let her get through this,” he prayed to whatever god would listen.

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A few hours later Spike heard the familiar scraping of the coffin moving to reveal the hidden staircase. He got to his feet and went to meet her at the bottom, not sure what kind of welcome he would receive.

Buffy stopped when she saw him, eyes narrowing angrily. She took a few deep breaths and continued down the stairs, brushing past him quickly.

The coffin slid back into place above them.

Spike leaned against the wall and crossed his arms, bracing himself for the anger he knew was coming.

Every time Buffy opened her mouth to speak, she was hit with an onslaught of emotion, that forced her to shut her mouth again or breakdown crying. Spike just calmly watched. It made her sick how unaffected he seemed.

Holding on to her rage at Spike, she flew at him, fists swinging and legs kicking.

The rush of adrenaline didn’t last long. Buffy was hurt, disillusioned and exhausted. And Spike’s strong arms felt good wrapped around her as they both sank to the floor. She was crying full out now, letting him rock her. Needing to feel safe and loved.

She was barely aware of him taking her to bed before the dream started.

She was at a funeral in bright daylight. Angel and Spike walked up to her. They stopped a few feet in front of her and hugged, murmuring to each other too softly for her to hear. Spike smiled at Angel then at her before walking around to stand behind her. She couldn’t see him anymore, but she felt him there. If felt right.

Angel walked up to the grave and looked down then back up at her, face bathed in sunlight.

“You have to know what to see,” he told her, earnestly.

She looked at him, not really understanding, and then back down at the grave. She looked over at the other people attending the funeral and saw Jenny Calendar lifting a veil from her face.

She awoke and automatically reached to the other side of the bed, opening her eyes when she felt Spike under her hands. He was asleep, and muttering something about bath tile under his breath. She smiled in spite of herself and dropped a quick kiss on his forehead, whispering, “Thanks, Spike.”

Buffy got dressed, her smile fading as she thought about the dream. Jenny was involved somehow, and she was going to figure out how.

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Spike woke when she slipped from the bed, but stayed quiet. She needed to prepare herself for what had to be done, and talking to him might open the floodgates again. He looked at his clock. He had eight sunny bright hours to sleep away before it would be time to leave. The showdown with the Judge would be at the mall, and he planned to attend. He would be there to watch if nothing else.

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Spike made it just time to see the fight between Buffy and Angelus. He was sure to keep himself hidden as he critiqued their fight.

“You know what the worst part was, huh? Pretending that I loved you. If I'd known how easily you'd give it up, I wouldn't have even bothered,” Angelus taunted.

Spike scoffed.

The git always was too wordy. If he’d just learn to lose himself in the fight… but that was Spike’s secret. Buffy would never fight anyone the way she fought him.

“That doesn't work anymore. You're not Angel,” Buffy retorted.

Spike rolled his eyes. More talking. His Buffy would have staked the bastard by now.

“You'd like to think that, wouldn't you? It doesn't matter. The important thing is you made me the man I am today!”

He gave her an evil smile.

Buffy kicked him in the face, and the fight was on.

A few minutes into it, Angelus managed to knock her to the floor.

“Not quittin' on me already, are ya? Come on, Buffy. You know you want it, huh?”

Spike felt a jolt of anger on her behalf and had to stop himself from rushing out there to finish it once and for all.

Buffy beat Angelus down and pulled out a stake, threateningly. After hesitating, she lowered it in despair.

“You can't do it. You can't kill me,” he cackled at her.

Her anger took over and she kicked him extremely hard in the crotch. Angelus grabbed his groin and moaned in extreme pain collapsing to his knees.

Buffy turned her back on him and walked away.

“Give me time.”

As soon as Buffy was out of sight, Spike emerged from his hiding spot.

The brunette vampire glared at Spike through his pain.

“You’re in over your head mate. Been there, done that,” Spike warned, then gave his soul-less sire and good punch in the face.

Angelus fell to the floor, unconscious.

Spike lit a cigarette, and started to leave.

“And I ain’t going anywhere.”


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When Spike got home late that night he was pleasantly surprised to find a cup cake with a melted candle in the center of it sitting on his kitchen counter. He smiled, but even as he enjoyed the chocolatey confection (Joyce was an excellent cook) it was the dark red rose beside it that made him grin.

End Chapter 6

A/N: I know Spike’s attitude change in the middle of this chapter may have seemed odd, but remember he doesn’t have a soul. So, if Buffy doesn’t get her act together, he will revert to the season 6 Spike who was jealous, manipulative and almost destructive. But he still loved her and helped her, though sometimes reluctantly. His love isn’t quite as pure, and he’s still having trouble reconciling this ‘teenager’ with the heroine he truly loves. But don’t worry, Spike will come to his senses. He always does.

Thanks so much for the wonderful reviews, they are what inspires me to write. I will do my best to get the next chapter out next week. And I promise Spike and Buffy are going to hit the sheets next chapter.

-PJ