Speed Demon

Chapter Nineteen

Xander groaned into the pillow when the sound of knocking pierced his consciousness. It felt like he had just fallen asleep and he had no desire to climb out of the warm bed to go answer the door. Prying open a blurry brown eye, he glanced at the clock on the bedside table and groaned again.

He had just fallen asleep. Although being emotionally and physically drained, his mind had been too wound up to sleep earlier and he had spent a little over three hours gazing down at Spike’s peaceful face.

Yawning widely enough that he heard his jaw pop, he stumbled from the bed and reached down to slide on his jeans from earlier, wanting to get to the door before the knocking woke Spike. Even though he had a feeling he would be waking the sleeping blonde, anyway.

He doubted the security in the hotel would allow reporters inside and the knocking was too hesitant to be Oz or any of the rest of the guys, so he figured it was Willow. If it was Willow, then she must be ready to speak to her brother and Xander wasn’t going to stand in the way.

Grimacing, his hand unconsciously went to his tanned and taut stomach, kneading slightly as images from earlier in the day swamped him. The thought that Spike could have been seriously injured or killed still made his knees weak and his belly lurch. The belly which was still trembley and uneasy over how they had resolved the issue.

While it seemed to have eased some of Spike’s guilt, he hadn’t liked it in the least. The absolute last thing he wanted was to ever be the cause of Spike’s tears again. Not that he thought for a minute that it would ever come to that again; no, he had meant what he had told Spike. The next time, he was gone. He wouldn’t put himself through what he had watching that race again, not even for Spike.

He loved the boy. He could admit it, now.

Head over heels, drowning, achingly in love.

He couldn’t watch him self-destruct. After staring down at that sleeping face for 3 hours, he had come to the conclusion that he didn’t regret it, what he had done earlier. Not if it would convince the boy he was serious and cared enough to try to stop him from dancing with death. He bitterly regretted that it had come to that, though, and knew it would be awhile before it sat well with him, if it ever did.

If Spike wanted to play around with spanking sometime, he had no problems with it and without a doubt would enjoy it, but he wasn’t going to allow the boy to make it a magic cure-all button he could push every time he went too far. It might have worked out okay in the situation earlier but Xander wasn’t going to permit himself to be manipulated into a position he had no desire to be in.

If the boy didn’t respect him enough to listen to what he said without threats hanging over his head, then it was pointless to waste his breath.

Shaking himself out of his thoughts, he opened the door and smiled slightly. Willow smiled back, eyes puffy in her sad but brave face, stepping forward into the room as he stepped backwards to allow her in.

He closed the door soundlessly behind her and when she turned to him, he wrapped her into a tight embrace, kissing the top of her flame red hair softly. The bonds they had forged in the terror of that macabre race had brought them closer than if they’d known each other for years, instead of days.

“How’re you feelin’, honey?” he asked quietly, stepping back so that he could tilt her chin up and read her eyes. Sad but calm green eyes stared solemnly back.

“I’m okay, I guess. Better. It’s not like I haven’t seen him do it before, after all, just not usually in a car going a million miles an hour. Not that it’s any worse than the other times but I was there and able to reach him then, you know? At least the times I was there, I don’t know if there were any I don’t know about, obviously, and I’ll shut up now,” she said, trying to smile.

He laughed softly, leading her to the living room. Sitting down on the small couch, he motioned for her to take a seat and she perched on the chair in front of him. “It’s okay, I was king of the babble in high school. Only just grew out of it, for the most part. It’s nice to know that I’m not the only one Spike drives to it.”

“Who’mi driving to what?” Spike mumbled sleepily, standing in the doorway of the bedroom, wearing a pair of Xander’s sweatpants and an old t-shirt. Xander had to smile as he watched the sleepy blonde rub at bleary blue eyes, white hair sticking out all over his head, the impression of the pillowcase still across one sleep-flushed cheek.

When Spike’s eyes flickered to Willow, Xander saw them widen before the boy dropped his gaze to the floor, nibbling on his bottom lip in anxiety. When those pale blue eyes lifted again to find his face, Xander held out a hand to him and Spike walked over and grasped it, letting him tug the younger man down onto his lap.

“Hey, sweetheart,” he murmured into the tousled blonde curls, kissing him on the forehead tenderly. Spike nuzzled his nose into the crook of his neck and Xander had to stop himself from sliding a hand up underneath the soft t-shirt to stroke his lover's silken sleep-warmed skin. His eyes found Willow’s and the red-head smiled softly at him before her eyes went back to lovingly trace the boy in his arms.

After another moment of cuddling, Spike turned his head and smiled hesitantly at his sister. “Hey, Wills.”

“William,” she replied softly.

They stared at each other a minute, an uneasy silence reigning, before they both started speaking at the same time.

“I can’t-”

“I’m-”

Snickering, they both stopped and waited for the other to continue. Spike finally motioned for her to go on and she swallowed nervously before saying, “I can’t ever watch you do that again, William. I love you more than anyone else on the planet and I don’t know what I would do without you. He’s not worth it, he just isn’t.”

Ducking his head against Xander’s chest, Spike’s fingers clenched on the arm holding him onto the older man’s lap. Xander’s other hand came up to stroke lightly along his tense back and Spike said quietly, “’M sorry, Wills. Wasn’t thinking at all. You know I wouldn’t upset you on purpose.”

He smirked, Xander could feel it against his neck and hear it in his voice when Spike said, “But I don’t think the wanker’ll be haunting me so much, now.” Xander's own lips twitched when he remembered the flummoxed look on Spike’s father’s face.

Willow shook her head at them, bright red hair glistening in the lamplight and grinned slightly, saying, “Yeah, that’s another reason I’m here. Turn on the tv.”

Xander and Spike exchanged looks and the blonde leaned forward to pick up the remote, sliding off of Xander's lap to sit next to him as he turned the television on. The television that the hotel staff had replaced discreetly just the day before.

He didn’t have to ask Willow what she was talking about. The tv was already turned to the local news station and as soon as it flickered on, Spike’s picture was up on the screen. They talked briefly about Spike’s career and the win earlier that day, before rolling footage of the fight and punch that sent the older man to the ground.

“They’ve been showing it over and over for hours,” she said, as the news people laughed and made comments and speculations about why they had been arguing. Looking at Spike, Willow tilted her head and smiled uncertainly.

“You know I don’t believe in meeting violence with violence, or else I would have beat that jerk’s head in years ago,” she said quickly, giving them a fierce look that made Xander believe that she was fully capable of doing so, “and he is my step-father, but I just couldn’t stop laughing when I saw that on the news earlier. Even though it meant that he had done something to make you mad enough to hit him, though you don’t need a reason, well a new reason, but still I had hoped he wouldn’t bother you while he was here and I’m so not okay with that but it was good to see you hit him,” she finished in a rush, staring at Spike earnestly, hands clenched on her lap.

Spike ducked his head and smirked, peeking up at her from underneath his lashes, and said, “S’okay. It felt good to hit him, it did.” They looked at each other a few more moments, then they both snorted and burst into snickers, leaving Xander shaking his head at them.

They were adorable all hunched over with laughter, breath hiccupping and tears rolling down their flushed faces. While the look on their father’s face had been amusing, to be sure, it hadn’t been that funny, but he knew that their laughter was about more than that. It was about the release of almost a decade’s worth of built up tension, fear and guilt.

When they both laughed themselves off of their respective pieces of furniture, meeting up on the carpeted floor, they sat down and hugged each other tightly, gasping for breath as trickles of laughter still vibrated through them. Hands clenched in his lap, Xander watched helplessly as the last vestiges of laughter led to trembling lips and overfilling eyes as their snickers turned to choked sobs as they clung to each other.

He wanted to drop to his knees beside them, tell them that he would make everything all right and no one would ever hurt them again, but he knew it wasn’t up to him. It was themselves they had to believe in now; they were the only ones who could fix each other because it was their own guilt over the other that had broken them so badly.

When the harsh sobs had dwindled to nothing more than the occasional sniffle and hiccup, he finally allowed himself to drop down to the floor and gently wipe the remaining tears from the sibling’s wet faces. They blinked at him for a moment, then both slim bodies threw themselves into his open arms and he held them tightly, gently kissing the top of both heads of bright hair.

After they all composed themselves, they sat on the floor, backs against the couch and watched the television. Xander absently played with the curls at Spike’s nape and the blonde held onto his sister’s hand, nails with chipped black polish dark against her pale skin. When the show they had been watching played its closing credits, the news came back on and they all stiffened as Spike’s face was once again displayed on the screen.

“English driver Ian Thomas told reporters just minutes ago that he is leaving for London in the morning and has no desire to press assault charges against his son, William Thomas, better known in the US as Spike. He claims it was a family misunderstanding and still hopes that William will come home to England to race there and film some commercials with him. As a race fan, I have to say I hope Spike declines the offer, we would hate to lose him.”

The anchor man went on, but the three of them glanced at each other and rolled their eyes, even though they sagged a little in relief that Ian wouldn’t be pressing charges. They all knew why the older man wouldn't, so it really wasn’t a surprise to them. The last thing the man would want was someone digging into his relationship Spike.

After a moment, Spike grabbed the remote and changed the channel, finding an action movie on that none of them had seen before and they watched it until Willow started yawning.

While Xander got up, groaning at the ache in his back and legs from sitting in the floor for hours, to take their popcorn bowls and empty cans of Coke back to the kitchen, he saw the two of them hug tightly and talk quietly, their heads almost touching. By the time he left the kitchen, they were standing by the door and laughing again, though their eyes looked sad.

She had to get in bed and they had to follow shortly, since they had to take her back to the airport the next morning. Spike had arranged for Angel to meet her there a few days before, so that she would have a ride to her aunt’s house.

Smiling at Xander brightly, green eyes speaking volumes to him, Willow kissed him on the cheek and told him goodnight before hugging Spike once more and opening the door. The blonde quietly murmured something to her before closing and locking the door behind her, the soft click echoing in the silent room.

“Gonna really miss her,” he finally said softly, shoulders dropping dejectedly as he stared at the closed door and Xander stepped up behind him, big hands coming up to knead gently. As Spike sighed and leaned back against his chest, Xander dropped his hands to the blonde’s slim waist and hugged him lightly.

“I know, baby. I will, too. She’s great, Spike, though how the two of you turned out so well, I have no idea.”

Spike snorted and turned around in his arms, head nuzzling into its rightful place at the crook of his shoulder. “We bloody well raised each other, that’s how.”

Xander made a soft sound of agreement as his hands did what they had been wanting to do since he had seen his lover walk into the room hours ago. They slid up underneath his old t-shirt to stroke over the silky smooth skin of Spike’s back, sliding down to where his sweats were barely clinging to the smaller man’s hips. As his fingers grazed the warm skin under the waistband, at the dip of Spike’s spine, the blonde sighed softly into his neck and rolled his hips backwards into Xander’s teasing touch.

“Need you,” he felt more than heard as Spike mouthed it quietly along the sensitive skin on the side of his neck and he almost purred in agreement. He wanted the lithe blonde in his arms, too, he always did. Craved him.

“You’ve got me,” he whispered, hands lightly gripping Spike’s hips to press into him, softly rubbing his hardening cock against the blonde’s. A low moan vibrated through his lover’s body, Spike lifting his head to nibble and kiss his way up Xander’s neck and chin to reach for his mouth.

Dipping his head slightly, Xander let Spike bite gently at his lips, coaxing them apart for his velvet tongue, which teased and stroked against his own. Slow ripples of pleasure snaked up and down his spine and he clutched the blonde closer, carefully walking backwards towards their room while Spike plundered his mouth.

The room was dim, only a soft grey light coming in from the window by the bed and Xander squinted slightly as he turned them around, trying to avoid the clothes still crumpled on the floor. Spike gave a muffled ‘oof’ when the backs of his knees met the mattress and released Xander’s mouth to sprawl backwards on the bed, gazing up at Xander through half-closed eyes, tongue licking over his swollen lips.

Xander’s body trembled with need at the sight, every inch of him ready to pounce on the boy and take what was his, but he still felt raw and vulnerable from earlier and could only imagine how much more Spike felt.

With all the tenderness inside him that he felt for the boy, he leaned over and gently cupped his face, thumbs caressing those sharp cheekbones as he ducked his head to brush a feather-light kiss on Spike’s parted lips, a kiss so achingly soft and tender that when he raised his head, there were tears glistening in the pale eyes.

“I love you,” Xander whispered, watching intently as Spike’s eyes widened in the shadowed light, glinting brightly as they filled and spilled over. Lips catching the tiny drops of moisture before they could touch Spike’s cheeks, Xander swore to himself that they would be the last the blonde cried that day.

Kissing softly over the boy’s face, he gave him no chance to respond before he was covering him, hands and mouth driving the boy into a fever of need as he slowly stripped him. Hands stroked and held him still as Xander’s mouth kissed, licked and worshipped every inch of his trembling body, until he was a shaking, writhing mess, mindlessly whimpering in the moonlight.

Hot, fumbling hands tugged at the waist of Xander’s jeans and he moved downwards, pressing a last openmouthed kiss to Spike’s trembling belly before standing and unzipping them carefully, hard flesh aching from being pressed against the rough metal zipper. Spike lay gasping underneath him, chest rising and falling roughly as he stared up at Xander, eyes hot and mouth wet and swollen, hands clenching in the cool sheets.

As he reached into his pocket to pull out a condom, Spike made a small sound and he glanced down at the boy’s flushed face.

“Don’t. Please? I want just you in me,” he said softly, teeth worrying his puffy lower lip as he stared up into Xander’s dark eyes. Hands shaking, Xander froze and breathed in deeply, trying to keep control as those soft words shook him.

Seeing his hesitation, Spike smirked a little and said, “Sides, not like we don’t already have anything the other’s got, the way we suck each other off all the time.”

Xander smiled back ruefully and shook his head, “Can’t resist the taste of you, baby.”

Sliding the packet back into his jeans, he slid them off and kicked them away before starting towards the nightstand. Spike made a soft whining protest when Xander moved away but stopped when he saw him grab the small tube of lubricant and climb over the side of the bed.

He patted the pillows and Spike rolled over, crawling upwards towards him, a pale sleek cat with burning blue eyes. Growling with lust, Xander slid around behind him, covering the slender body with his own, reacting to some deeply primal instinct as his hands gripped the slim hips, teeth nibbling and tugging at the vulnerable skin at the nape of Spike’s neck.

The blonde whimpered as he tilted his head down, hands grabbing for the iron bars of the headboard, hips arching backwards against Xander’s. Closing his eyes tightly, Xander rocked his hips into the cleft of Spike’s ass, both of them shuddering, as his hand reached blindly for the lube. Working the top off, he slicked up a few fingers and slid them in between their bodies, rubbing gently at Spike’s puckered opening. As first one, then two, fingers slid inside, working their way past the clenching muscle, the blonde made a soft keening noise and spread his knees further apart, resting his head down on the pillows as his ass arched further into the air.

Stroking his fingers in and out, stretching Spike, Xander had to glance away from the beautifully erotic picture the boy made, gritting his teeth as he fought for control. When the blonde was near sobbing with need, he gently removed his fingers after giving one last rub to the sensitive prostate, and brought the tip of his swollen cock to the pulsing entrance to his lover’s body.

Groaning at the heady sensation, he pushed slowly forward, burying himself deep inside Spike, gasping at the feel of skin on skin for the first time. Slowly, tenderly, Xander moved within the blonde, his hands coming around to grasp Spike’s on the headboard, pressing light kisses and nibbling bites to the expanse of sleek pale flesh underneath him.

Long, slow shallow strokes, until Spike was writhing and cursing under him, gasping out pleas and demands in the same breaths. The more he begged, the slower Xander went, achingly, torturously slow, every muscle in his arms quivering as his breath hitched with every thrust. When Spike could do no more than whimper out broken moans, he gradually sped up, sweat running slickly down his back as his muscles burned and ached, body shaking with the desire to pound into him.

As Spike started to come, the blonde sobbed out a breath roughly, hips bucking and jerking as if it was so agonizingly intense that he wanted to get away from the pleasure wracking his body, but Xander slid his hands down the boy’s arms to grip his hips, holding him still for his driving thrusts. Hands spasming on the iron bars, Spike shook and moaned helplessly underneath him, gasping in air to drag into his lungs as he clenched tightly around Xander’s throbbing cock.

It took only a moment of that before Xander was throwing his head back and crying out, emptying deeply into Spike’s still shaking body, the ecstasy of it burning white-hot through him. As the pleasure finally waned, he was left feeling as if he’d been hit with a truck, his body ached so badly. Collapsing half on the blonde, half on the bed, his ears buzzing, rough panting gasps into Spike’s neck, he laughed silently as the aftershocks still vibrated through him.

Much more of that and the boy was going to be the death of him.