Broken (AKA Beautiful Broken)

*

Xander stirred when the bed under him moved, triggering cramps that had kept him awake most of the night.

“Rocim, get him cleaned up for the day,” Lirowaus commanded, and Xander slipped off the bed and walked to Rocim without being ordered. The small demon sniffed at him disgustedly and Xander wondered if he was offended by some lingering Eau de Spike or whether Rocim didn’t like a human smelling like Lirowaus. Xander figured it didn’t matter as long as he finally got to go to the bathroom. He followed quietly with his guts cramping badly enough to make him want to drop to the ground.

Luckily Rocim unlocked the belt contraption and allowed Xander to use the bathroom first before washing, drying, and decorating Lirowaus’ newest slave. Xander hadn’t realized what a ceremony Spike had made of the decorations until he felt Rocim’s coldly efficient hands attaching his decorations without comment. The back chains and the long front chain with his three stones, his black hobbles and his leather arm bands. In Spike's care these felt sensual, now it made Xander feel somehow less human to be so casually treated even though the treatment really was an improvement on Leshar’s, so Xander couldn’t figure out why it was bothering him so damn much.

Rocim grabbed him by an arm and pulled him back into Lirowaus’ room.

“He still smells of vampire, lord,” Rocim announced, and Xander found his earlier question answered.

“Well we do know how to fix that,” Lirowaus commented and then looked at Xander who knelt on the floor watching in furtive glances. “But I do not want that belt ruining his appearance. Find another means of securing the plug until such time as he stops smelling like that half-breed.” Rocim turned and left without comment, and when Xander heard the Present command and Lirowaus patted the bed, Xander went into position numbly, knowing what his master planned.

Xander floated in and out of awareness as he set his body to motion following his master’s commands. He didn’t really actually register anything until a flood running into his guts made him groan, and then the only response was the withdrawal of Lirowaus’ cock and the insertion of the wide plug that strained his muscles. On command, Xander knelt up into the Position kneel and when he clasped his hands behind him, he felt the leather cuffs clicking into place. He briefly considered pointing out that he had no reason to fight so the cuffs weren’t necessary, but he didn’t really care enough to bother. Only when Rocim’s hand grabbed his genitals did he really pay attention, and he watched as the minion fastened a wide black leather loop around his cock and balls tight enough to be aggravating but loose enough to not really bother him too much. Rocim picked up the trailing chain and put it between Xander’s legs and pushed up on the plug before pulling at his wrist cuffs.

Xander suspected the set up, but for curiosity’s sake he pulled his hands up, and the chain pulled his genitals down a corresponding distance. Well at least it wasn’t the thick wire loop of the training hobbles, Xander thought as his cock gave a dull ache of complaint. Lirowaus seemed to approve of the solution because a large clawed finger ran along Xander’s cuffed wrists and then the flat of Lirowaus’ hand rested on Xander’s hip as Xander held position.

“What a good pup. I think I may have that tongue pierced. I can see you with a chain around here,” Lirowaus said as he ran a nail across Xander’s cheek from the corner of each side of his mouth around the back of Xander’s head. Lirowaus gave him a slap on the butt and then got off the bed. “Come on then.”

Xander padded after his master silently with his head down. He ate out of a bowl at his master’s feet. He dripped water from his chin which he couldn’t wipe when he drank water. He followed Lirowaus from one room to another, and he didn’t even look at the other slaves who came and went. Xander barely noticed when a day disappeared…. or two…. or three…. or four days.

When day five came with its inevitable demand for sexual performance, Lirowaus didn’t put the plug in and Xander knew that the last trace of Spike had been driven out of his body by the sheer volume of Lirowaus’ come, and now he had nothing left of Spike because no matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t hide in the memory of his former Master. Xander knew it was because he had disobeyed Spike, and he wondered if he had ruined some plan of Spike’s by not trusting him. That thought sometimes nagged him as he sat at his new master’s feet with his hands locked behind him because Lirowaus liked the look. More days passed marked only by their unremarkable sameness.

Xander knelt by Lirowaus in the study when Rocim appeared in the doorway.

“Lord, Ulsha is here,” the small demon announced and then disappeared back around the corner. Lirowaus turned in his chair and rose to meet his guest, and Xander angled his body so that he kept in proper form.

“Ulsha, how wonderful of you to visit,” Lirowaus exclaimed as the demon from the Sacramento slave auction appeared in the doorway.

“Yes, I heard you had a new acquisition, and I thought I would stop and see for myself.” Xander remained motionless, barely listening to the conversation as the two men touched briefly before taking seats, Xander kneeling beside his master silently.

“So, since you have a new human to show off, will you go to the Vegas auction?” The humanish demon asked without any sort of small talk at all. Lirowaus laughed.

“I am considering. He is such a sweet animal; he never asks for anything and he can provide incredible pleasure. I don’t believe in the sort of training Leshar provides, but this sweet thing has suggested a new approach for my training.”

“Oh, really? I would be interested in discussing any procedure that you think might result in such quiet obedience.” Ulsha leaned forward and Xander found himself having his first emotion of the day: fury. Ulsha had sent them here; he had set them up. Xander wanted to take the creature and tear his guts open but just like a wave that crashes through only to dissipate on the shore, Xander’s fury collapsed into despair as he realized he would never have that chance. His only option was to kneel at his master’s feet and hope that Spike found a way out.

“Yes, he really is a treat. And so many of my slaves will whine and negotiate for more and more time with their bonding group, but my lovely pup here is happy to stay at my feet all day. I’m quite taken with him.”

“And I can see why.” There was a lull in the conversation. “So, he performs well?” Xander knew what was following, and when Lirowaus pulled his first cock out of his pants, Xander moved obediently into position, licking along the length and nipping the sides in preparation. He’d learned to not think of anything during this act because any fantasy or memory he conjured just mutated into the face of some person he had once known condemning him. So he thought of nothing as he finally took the head in his mouth and swallowed the length. The end of the cock was so small it easily fit, but he also knew that it would soon become large enough to lock him in place until he could finish the job, so he breathed deeply knowing what was coming and sunk his teeth into the base of the cock even as he moved his head from side to side to stimulate it. Sure enough, the cock began growing slowly, the shaft in his throat expanding until he struggled to breathe as the organ did its job and
expanded to fit the available space. Xander then started jerking back as hard as he could to the sound of Lirowaus grunting. Before long a hand tangled in his hair and tightened as his master held him still.

“You’re distracting me, boy. Pleasure later, guests now.” Xander froze with his mouth wedged open and his throat tight enough that he struggled to breathe, but the choice wasn’t his so he closed his eyes and scooted his knees closer so that he didn’t wear out his back while waiting. Lirowaus continued to pet him and then resumed the conversation as though he didn’t have a slave attached to him.

“I even offered to put him with a bonding group thinking that it would provide leverage for later, but he declined, and he is willing to work without any further incentive than pleasing me.” Xander knew that to be a lie, but given his current situation, he wasn’t likely to tell anyone. He felt a line of drool start out of the corner of his mouth.

“So he serves for no rewards. Doesn’t that contradict your whole theory of training?” Ulsha pointed out. Lirowaus made an unhappy noise.

“He has a reward, but it is one reward that serves to keep him obedient permanently. Obviously I wish to experiment some with this method, but I am hoping to develop some new training techniques based on my experiences with my beautiful pup, and I’m also planning on breeding him.”

“Private breedings only? I have several healthy females that are ready to breed. The last breeder I used was a total failure; all of his cubs were horribly near sighted and quite frankly rather unattractive. Of the six cubs he bred, I put all but one down.”

Xander tried to ignore the words, but the word ‘cubs’ wormed its way into his imagination, and he saw Weird Wendell with his spiders and his big glasses who had a crush on Willow back in first grade. Imagining these demons so casually killing children like that left Xander glad for the intrusion in his mouth because it kept him from screaming his frustration. He pulled air through his nose and tried not to think of his own children so casually handled because he knew it would happen. It would happen because he wasn’t ever going to be strong enough to stop it. Xander put a stop to all his thoughts and focused on this image of white static that he found he could use to focus his mind away from all the ugliness.

“I’m telling you, the stock would be better if we killed all the plastic surgeons in California. It’s quite frustrating to find, train and breed stock only to find out that the traits you liked weren’t natural to begin with.” Lirowaus made a disgusted noise, and Xander amused himself with thoughts of that piece of irony. Disgusting was the slave trade. Disgusting was Lirowaus thinking he could treat people like animals, and the whole concept of having children for this man made Xander more ill than anything he had done so far, but slave-choiceless-choiceless-slave. He knew the kind of drugs they used to force breedings.

Hell, disgusting was a person who would betray his rescuer and instead give himself away to something as disgusting as Lirowaus. Disgusting was willingly kneeling with a demon’s penis lodged in your throat. Yep, Xander imagined Giles’ face if the watcher could see him now, and he knew the definition of disgusting. Plastic surgery didn’t even rate on the same scale. Xander knew he should feel something at those thoughts…rage, frustration, anger, fear, embarrassment. The only thing he felt was the soreness in his throat as he struggled to pull air in past the obstruction. Then the white static moved in over his mind without him even trying to summon it.

“Well I imagine that once you’ve shown that those looks are genetic, you’ll get lots of offers. If his temperament transfers to the cubs you’re going to have to keep him well fed just to keep up with all the breeding offers. That vampire who was showing him around really made quite an impression.” Xander opened his eyes at the mention of Spike, but the only thing he saw was Lirowaus’ stomach, and he knew he had no claim on the vampire any more so he closed his eyes and went back to focusing on the breathing. God he wanted to pull, but he wouldn’t disobey because he was the slave: the pathetic creature on his knees. He was just the animal they discussed breeding with all the interest of horse breeders.

“I have trouble understanding why a vampire was ever allowed into an auction. They are utterly disgusting, violent half-breeds who have no business buying stock. Their only interest in humans is either eating them or creating more half-breeds out of them.”

“William the Bloody is a rather unique case. I don’t know how he got into the first auction, but a number of people offered invitations to the Sacramento show because they wished to make an offer on your newest slave or they wished to purchase breeding rights. I am surprised he parted with that little animal; how much did you have to pay?” Lirowaus laughed, and Xander noticed a spot on his knee where he was kneeling on something sharp: a pebble maybe. The pain helped him focus away from Lirowaus so he pressed down harder.

“I don’t purchase animals from vampires.” Lirowaus announced haughtily. “However I wasn’t about to leave such a superior animal with a vampire either.”

“You killed him,” Ulsha said in a tone that sounded admiring.

“I removed him from the field,” Lirowaus corrected. Xander focused on his knee. “He will never touch my pup again. Pup, look at me,” Xander opened his eyes as commanded and squirmed to look up with his head so firmly locked in place. However, the tilted angle actually did free his nose from the smell of Kailiff demon so that he could catch fresh air. Lirowaus a finger along either cheek, tracing their bulging shape and looking down with an expression of fond possessiveness. “No one will ever touch you again without my permission. You are mine and I will take care of you.” Lirowaus promised. Xander just blinked up at his master with tired eyes. “Now show me your gratitude.”

Xander immediately bit down, and Lirowaus happily squirmed as Xander started yanking back for all he was worth, abusing his muscles that cried for oxygen they weren’t receiving. He had learned the pattern of biting and yanking that worked best, and now he applied those skills as he felt Lirowaus’ cock burst in near record time. As the fluid flowed, Xander pressed in toward Lirowaus’ crotch so that the long penis would remain in his neck and prevent the necessity of actually tasting and swallowing the watery, bitter fluid.

When Xander felt his stomach fill with liquid and Lirowaus’ penis totally deflate, he nearly collapsed to the floor at Lirowaus’ feet, the vigorous physical activity combined with the lack of oxygen to leave him panting.

“Such an enthusiastic animal. I do hope he passes these traits on to his cubs,” Ulsha commented. “I would love to have a couple of female cubs with equal enthusiasm and stamina.”

“I assure you, he has had no alterations. He is simply the best human I’ve ever owned.” Xander felt that same poking sensation in his cheek and he shifted his head back, suddenly spotting the paperclip buried in the carpet. Xander flashed back to a conversation from a couple of lifetimes ago: a conversation between Spike and his former self.

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Spike: Don’t know why you don’t bloody use chains. I’m getting rope burn here, wanker.

Droopy: Yeah, right. If you’re asking for chains, I’m not stupid enough to use them.

Spike: This comin’ from a git stupid enough ta call himself a bloody ‘nummy treat’ in front of a vampire. I reckon your stupidity is already on record.

Droopy: Chipped vampire, I said it in front of a chipped vampire as in a declawed cat, a toothless lion, a pathetic old excuse for a demon that can’t eat any more.

Spike: When I get this chip out…

Droopy: Yeah, yeah. Death, mayhem, murder…I’ve heard this, but I’m not walking all the way over to Giles’ place to get you chains, especially if you want chains. You can probably pick the locks or something.

Spike: Bloody right. Spend enough time with Angelus and you learn to do interesting things with paperclips.
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Now that Xander thought about it, he wondered if paperclips even existed back during Angelus’ time. Xander listened to the two demons above him discussing his physical attributes and he took the paperclip in his teeth, pulling it free from the carpet fibers and slipping it between his lower teeth and his cheek. He had no idea what to do with it now that he had hidden it, but just the act of hiding the small piece of metal from his master somehow comforted him.

Xander must have missed some part of the conversation because the two demons had stood and Xander hurried to stand at his master’s side, his hands cuffed behind him, his hip chains tangled from lying on the floor, and his head lowered in submission.

“Is he quite well?”

“Humans are always coming down with some illness. I’ll have my healer look at him,” Lirowaus answered and Xander realized they were talking about him. Xander almost snorted in laughter. Not quite well didn’t even cover it. He was nauseous, tired, and sore; his muscles still trembled, his throat hurt, and he honestly wanted to die. Physically he was about a thousand percent better than when Leshar had owned him, but he just couldn’t keep fighting any more.

Ulsha must have taken Lirowaus at his word because they walked out talking, and Xander stayed at heel, his knees trembling. Once Ulsha had driven away, Xander followed his master back into the house, kneeling when Lirowaus dropped into his favorite chair. Lirowaus reached down and started untangling Xander’s various decorative chains.

"You are not performing as well for me as you did for that vampire. Your performance will improve or I will assume you have violated your end of the bargain. “Xander knew what that would mean, but suddenly he had a goal of his own. He used the one word Lirowaus' slaves were always allowed to use without permission.

"Negotiate," he offered. Lirowaus froze in the middle of smoothing out a hip chain.

"You do surprise me, pup. Every time I think I can predict your behavior, you change." Xander waited for permission to continue with his proposal. "So, you think that being affectionate should fall outside your already standing agreement? Be careful, little one. I don't think you want to say anything that suggests you aren't honoring our contract." Xander considered his words; he had already given away his compliance.

"I will act affectionate if you let me say goodbye to Spike," Xander offered, nearly choking on the name.

"You will be affectionate from now on?" Lirowaus asked.

"From now on, as long as I can say a proper goodbye and service him one last time." Xander avoided the verbs all together since he couldn't promise to 'be' affectionate and he knew he would just anger his master to emphasize the 'act' affectionate part.

"I do not want the hassle of trying to get rid of that smell a second time, so you will not have his bodily fluids inside my property," Lirowaus insisted, and Xander nodded. As much as he really did want to finish the act properly, he didn't want another deodorizing treatment from his current master. They hurt.

"Rocim!" The human-looking minion appeared at the door instantly. Xander wondered if the man hovered on the other side of the door constantly. He flashed on an image of Rocim brushing his teeth standing at the door waiting to serve. Loser.

"Rocim, take the vampire to the first chamber and prepare him accordingly," Lirowaus ordered. Xander could feel his muscles start to shake. Prepare him? What had he done? Xander tried to look unconcerned since it was his attachment to Spike that angered Lirowaus the most.

"You have made this deal, will you now honor it, my pretty little one?"

"Yes, master." Xander pursed his lips and felt the paperclip press into his gums. He would honor it. He would act affectionate and be the best slave Lirowaus could ever want if he could just give Spike the chance to get away.

"Well then, in three days we shall either go to the Las Vegas auction and show the others your dedication to me, or I shall be disappointed and we will discuss renegotiating our contract." Xander knew what he would do; he'd already proven his willingness to do anything, and now he would prove it, not for Lirowaus but for Spike.

Rocim appeared in the doorway far sooner than Xander expected. "He's ready," the servant announced. Xander knelt nearly shaking in anticipation as Rocim hooked a leash to his collar. With the leash in place, Xander shifted over to Rocim's side and waited for only a second before Rocim started out of the room and Xander rose to follow. Xander walked the slave corridors for only the second time, and when they reached a plain door like any other heavy door in the hallway, Rocim ordered, "Floor."

Xander obediently folded his body and put his forehead to the ground as he felt the chain leash drop to the floor with a rattling, clinking sound. A metallic creak and then a scraping of door over stone and Xander could feel the changing air currents as the door opened. He itched to sit up and look in that door, but he remained kneeling next to the wall out of sight.

"Enjoying your new accommodations, vampire?" Rocim asked in a mocking tone, and Xander could feel the responding growl reverberate in his bones.

"What happened ta Xander?"

"What makes you think that anything has happened to Master Lirowaus' newest favorite?"

"Oh, I don't know...maybe because ya pulled me out of that room ta hang me up in here. Or is that wanker Lirowaus goin' back on his word?" Xander could hear chains clanging and he longed to look up, but he kept his forehead to the floor, unwilling to ruin this chance with disobedience even as he ran his tongue over the paperclip. God, please don't let Spike have just been making things up again, he quickly prayed, wondering if God listened to prayers for vampires.

"Lirowaus always keeps his word, but Xander has renegotiated." Xander could hear a sigh, and he cringed. That bastard Rocim was making it sound like Xander had given up on Spike. Well, he had given up on Spike in that he knew Spike would never want him after this, but he hadn't given up as in letting Lirowaus kill Spike.

"Bloody right, told ya that ya couldn't use me against him forever, so just get it bloody over with."

"Oh, vampire. You underestimate the damage you did to the animal. Even Master Lirowaus understands that you are the only bonding group the human will ever accept." Xander heard steps and then a hand picked up his leash and gave him a tug. Xander rose and followed silently, examining the rough stones beneath his bare feet rather than look at Spike whose eyes had to be full of condemnation. Why did he think he could do this, appear in front of Spike stinking of Lirowaus and broken far worse than Leshar had managed? Why did he think one little piece of metal would make a difference? He heard Spike's low rolling growl and he cringed. The growl stopped.

"Xan?" a voice called, and Xander tried to imprint that tone, the tone that he could no longer summon from his memories. "Pet?" Xander struggled not to cry at that word, so close to Lirowaus' word for him and yet so totally different. Leshar had even called him 'pet', but only Spike's word seemed leashed to his heart so that the sound of it pulled the pain of loss and the knowledge of his own betrayal to the surface.

"Master Lirowaus and I leave for a show in three days," Xander said quietly, the longest sentence he'd said in days, but he hoped that Spike heard the unsaid words: Security would change in three days, staff would be disrupted in three days, the vampire had a chance to escape in three days. Xander risked a glance up and Spike watched him with his arms chained to the ceiling, his legs spread and chained to the floor, stripped naked and staring with a head cocked to one side. Xander only hoped that the expression was one of forgiveness because he couldn't quite decipher it.

Xander expected Rocim to drop the leash, but instead the handler walked forward with Xander at heel. Rocim stopped near Spike and gestured Xander forward. Pulling the bit of metal out of his cheek, Xander stepped up and kissed Spike, pressing his lips to his Master's lips and wishing he could run his shackled hands through Spike's mussed hair. Now that he was closer, he could see the color in Spike's cheeks and see the strong bones and muscles that had already healed. He could smell the cigarettes and he knew that his sacrifice had bought these things for Spike. Then he gave Spike the only thing he could. He opened his mouth and tilted his head to the side to seal his lips over Spike's, hiding the transfer as he pushed the paperclip into Spike's mouth. The vampire never even twitched, but Xander could feel an agile tongue pull the paperclip in and slide it into the vampire's cheek. Xander pulled back and looked into those blue eyes just once. Since his memories had failed him, he hadn't been able to even imagine that color blue.

Knowing that he would never see those eyes again, Xander lowered himself to the floor, and pressed his head into the hollow where Spike's leg and hip met, smelling his Master and imagining the time when other demons could smell that on him. He nuzzled the flesh, trying to pretend away Rocim and the chains that held Spike, and imagined them in Joyce's hallway. He ran his cheek along Spike's hip and stomach, just brushing his former Master's cock, and he could feel the responding shudder in Spike's body, the chains rattling some with the movement.

He felt the smooth, cool skin under his cheek, and he allowed himself to relax as the memories finally returned with the touch. Spike touching him and holding him. Spike sleeping on top of his cage, rising in the morning with sore groans but never abandoning him. Spike buying him from the auction and saving him...for a while at least. He’d had nearly two weeks of joy that he hadn't expected or deserved, and now he was back on the only path that had been open to him since the day that van had pulled up to him under the street lamp. Xander licked along the side of Spike's now growing cock, enjoying the predictable response and soft texture.

Spike had given him everything in those two weeks, and he{Xander} had responded by betraying him and allowing someone else to defile him. He remembered how Spike said that he didn't want a weak slave kneeling at his feet. Xander tried to exile that memory by taking the cock in his mouth, tonguing the foreskin and teasing the top of the cockhead. Spike had liked the fact that he was capable of still being strong even after Leshar, but he also knew that he wasn't strong any more. He was just a liability now because he couldn't even imagine fighting by Spike‘s side the way he had when they had slept those days at Joyce's place. The last piece of Droopy Harris was broken, and now he truly belonged to Lirowaus. Xander pushed his tongue out and deep throated Spike, running his tongue along the vein as he took the cock into his throat and swallowed. He could feel Spike convulse, but he didn't want it to be over that soon so he pulled back.

He sucked the head, letting the tip pop in and out of his mouth with corresponding groans from Spike. Then he released Spike altogether, determined to make this last time memorable enough to last him for the next couple of decades, fully expecting his other Spike-memories to fade. Those were of Master Spike, and he had no claim on Master Spike, but this was prisoner-Spike, and he resolved to create a single memory that made the rest worthwhile. Lowering his head, he nuzzled under Spike's now full-sized cock and licked across his balls, blowing air right after so that the hairs shivered as the skin contracted. He repeated this maneuver several times until Spike was making incoherent noises and then he scooted to a place directly between Spike's legs.

Wishing again that his hands were free, Xander licked and kissed his way back to Spike's hole, teasing the sensitive skin with the same lick-blow technique. But when he reached the actual entrance, he switched to a swirling motion. His tongue ached now, unused to performing this type of service any more. Lirowaus' preferences didn't run to this slow torment, but Xander ignored the pain as he closed his mouth over the entrance and gently sucked as he pushed his tongue against the tight muscle. Suddenly he could feel Spike's muscles loosen, and Xander pushed his tongue in, reaching as far as he could. The taste was musky and slightly sharp, a stronger version of the smell he loved, and he continued with his in and out strokes until he feared that Spike would come just from that action.

Knowing that his sore tongue and mouth couldn't perform well for much longer, and not even knowing how long he had now teased and tormented Spike who writhed in his chains, Xander moved back to the front and took the hard cock in his mouth. His own cock strained against his stomach, but Xander knew he would have release with Spike, so he ignored the ache between his own legs.

Xander played with the head of the cock and looked up for one last look when Spike suddenly stiffened. Xander knew he should pull back; he couldn't disobey Lirowaus, but he found himself immobilized by the sight of Spike with his head thrown back in pleasure. Just as he got his first real taste of Spike, Rocim yanked the leash and Xander found himself jerked away as Spike's seed arced through the air and landed on the ground. Xander's own cock twitched with a need to join his Master in that final act, but Xander realized that Spike wasn't his Master and this was nothing more than a farewell act...a scam to give Spike one chance.

Xander lowered his eyes to the floor and rearranged himself into a formal kneel as his own cock now deflated without release. Xander didn't look up into Spike's eyes, but closed his own eyes and remembered that look of confusion--much better than the condemnation he knew he'd see now. In three days he would be off to Las Vegas, and hopefully when they returned, Lirowaus would discover that Spike had escaped. Maybe Spike could even get the girls out or call Angel to get the girls out. Xander had seen Willow twice when she had been called to do spells. She had looked at him with such anguish and pity that he knew he wasn't worth saving, but she was. She still glared daggers at Lirowaus and performed only the most basic magic to keep her and Tara fed and relatively safe. She was strong.

Xander felt the tug at his leash and he rose to follow. At the doorway he stopped despite Rocim's continued pressure.

"Good-bye, Spike," Xander said without turning around. He sent up a second prayer that God would find it within his mercy to look after just one demon and then he walked away from his Master for the second time, this time for good.