The Road Out Of Hell

(co-written with art_of_mayhem)

“Look, I just have a thing, okay? It’s not you, it’s me,” Xander explained. “You look great... really...” he backed away from the blonde. She’d definitely looked hot before her eyes started to glow red. Fucking typical of him!

She started to cry, red tears streaming down the side of her face.

“Awww, come on... it was just one date.” He couldn’t have broken her heart just by refusing to go further than that kissing.

“You prejudiced bastard. You and your suburban dreams...”

Suburban? what the fuck... Xander's head swung around to find another demon there. A curse demon shouting at him. He recognized her for what she was because she'd been at his near wedding, a friend of Anya's. "No... wait, whoa there... Whoa... you really shouldn’t say that. Oh fuck!” The curse demon shouted her curse, and a second later, the world was swallowed up and he fell into some sort of concrete hell.

Dean jumped in the dark when he heard something in the dark of his cell. He had no weapons but he could fight so he was prepared for whatever it was.

Xander scrambled up, putting his hands out in protection. He knew someone or something else was in here. When his eyes adjusted to the semi-darkness, he was relieved that it at least looked human. “Hey... who’re you?”

Dean had pulled his body upright and to standing, ready to fight. He eased up when he saw it was a guy. Just a guy, or so he hoped. "Why don't you answer first since I'm the resident of this place."

“Fine, be that way....” Yeah, totally relieved on this end. “Okay, I’m Xander. I royally pissed off a demon girl, which... not so unusual for me,” he shrugged, and continued, “but had the bad luck of it happening with a curse demon around. I’m SO in a hell dimension, aren’t I?”

“Hell yeah," Dean nodded, "Dean. I pissed the same one off I guess. Lucky us." Dean sank back against the wall and slid down.

“Yeah... lucky,” Xander echoed, sliding down to the ground and leaning his back against the iron bars of the cell. “At least my curse demon gave me an ‘out’... not that it makes any sense. Could they like, for once, try to stay away from the cryptic?” Course not. “Did yours... Did she say anything?”

"She did, but it wasn’t cryptic. What did she say to you?" Dean asked, sitting up a little more interested.

“At first she was yelling about me wanting a house, a picket fence and a blonde who can bear my children.” He made a face that said she was totally nuts. “Well maybe she’s right about the picket fence part, that would be great for making stakes ...” Realizing he was going off topic, he went back to what the curse demon said. “Basically, I’m going to be stuck in a hell dimension until I forget all about my stupid, closed-minded, traditional ideas, and fuck someone other than Barbie!” His gaze slid to Dean. “Tell me Skipper’s around.”

"Not even Malibu Stacy is about. I rather stick my dick in a light socket than a demon hole that might have teeth. Hell, swimming in the water with a great white like in Jaws sounds pretty good." Dean glanced at the door. "I guess it's the 'Demons need love too' bullshit."

Xander winced. “Teeth in all the wrong places, just great. Though I’ve met a demon or two that were hot, I mean there was this teacher... but yeah, she liked to rip heads off after having sex and...” His thoughts were going nowhere good. “How long you been here?”

Dean shrugged, "A while. I lost track of the days. No sunlights," he pointed about. And their dinner looks just like their breakfast so it's hard to say. But I know my brother is out there probably trying to get me out."

“Does he even know where to look? I mean the Scoobs are probably looking for me too, but how’re they gonna know...” Xander slammed his fist on the bars. “Okay so find a toothless demon... that’s a plan, right?” There had to be more to it than that. This Dean guy would so have been out of here if were that simple. Maybe he wasn’t kidding about the quality of demons and all the teeth being in the wrong places. “Blindfolded, how about if we did them blindfolded,” he mused.

"It's not the whole principle of the thing. And my brother is resourceful. He knows a trick or two." Dean pointed up to the ceiling. "That is why they don't come in here... Devil's trap I managed to scrape into the ceiling with a rock."

Principle? Oh, he meant of the curse. Xander looked up. In the dim light, he could see the dark lines drawn into the ceiling. It looked like some of the protective circles and traps that Willow drew... not that he could tell the difference, he just trusted her to do the drawing. “Glad I don’t have demon blood then. So basically we’re safe sleeping here.”

He was about to ask another question, when footsteps resounded off the walls. He stood up and moved back, just as a gnarled demon walked up with a torch in her hand and knocked the wood part loudly against the steel bars. "Chow time... everyone out.”

Metal scraped against metal, as the demon opened the door and walked away.

"I ah... think that was the dinner invite. I'll stay right here. You go see what the party is all about...and maybe bring me back a nice snack." Xander looked hopefully over at Dean.

"Oh, gee thanks, send me out to Snaggle Puss, some hero you are," Dean pushed up. "I'll be back with your snack, if I'm not wearing it." He started heading for the door.

“Never said I was a hero, more like the handsome sidekick she turns to for advice,” he answered, following Dean out. As if he really planned to stay behind.

Other people... no ... things not people... were in the hallways, everyone walking in the same direction. Xander felt more than one interested gaze and shrank into himself. “I’m so not bumping uglies with these uglies. You weren’t exaggerating.”

Dean walked over and sat down in a chair and started reaching for the food, "I'll give them this, the food is freakin’ excellent though," he was half talking with his mouth full already.

The food might’a been okay, if Xander had been able to eat. Instead, he kept his eyes on all the others. The demons were pretty horrendous looking, as far as demons went. There were some humans, and all of them were males. He’d bet they’d all met the same damn curse demon. “Slim pickings... okay... so, guess I’ll plan to be here for the rest of my life,” he said as sunnily as he could. “It’ll save me from Christmas shopping with Willow.” He’d dreaded the shopping spree when he agreed, but right now, it made him homesick.

Dean looked up from his eating, "Huh?" He’d been half listening. "Christmas shopping? Is it close to Christmas? What day was it when you got here?" It all of a sudden became important to him.

What... you made a Christmas wish or something?” Weird how that topic had stopped Dean from shoveling more food in his mouth.

"Just answer me," Dean snapped.

“Twentieth. December twenty.” The guy seemed to pale. “Something wrong? Dean?”

Dean sat the fork down and just got up, walking away and back toward his cell.

Xander looked up at the ceiling, but hey... when had a higher deity EVER helped him? He dropped his fork and slowly headed after Dean. Ignoring the cat calls and the licking of chomps, he dashed past one of the jail bird demons who tried to get in the way.

“Hey... hey Dean...” Still no answer. Xander reached their cell and stood in the doorway. “What’s going on?”

"I didn't know how much time passed." He spoke softly looking up at the devil's trap. "I... they’re gonna kill my brother."

“What? You said he’d come after you... what do you mean, who is going to kill him?” Xander frowned and took a step inside, tugging at the collar of his tee. Heart-to-hearts with strangers, so not his strong point, and double that when it was with guys. “Watcha’ talking about. Maybe it’s not as bad as you think.”

Dean turned looking at the man, "They gave me a time limit unlike you, probably. If I didn't, they would kill my brother."

“Shit...” That sucked on even more levels than his own curse. “I don’t have one... a brother, or sister... or... okay, okay... I’ll go back in there. Gotta be one demon that’s not so bad. I mean, there were a lot of them in there. I wasn’t really looking to choose.”

Dean just stared then reached over, grabbing him by his shirt, "I think I got a way for both of us to get out of this. And no making fun of me later or I swear, I will kick your ass," He was pulling him closer.

“Ow.. hey...” Xander put his hands out to stop Dean. “Look, I get you’re upset. I said I’d help you get out, then you can send help back for me... what?” He didn’t like the steely gleam that entered Dean’s eyes. “I’m so not going first!” Yeah he’d been more than prepared to choose a demon for Dean, but getting one for himself was not in the plan!

Dean pushed those hands away and spun him around to back him against the wall near the door. "Look, neither you or I want demon vile in us. But they want us to be open minded..." He held Xander’s shirt with both hands and jerked him that short distance before kissing him squarely on his mouth.

The world kinda spun around as Xander tried to make sense of this. Guy. Lip lock... with guy. So not happening... Then why were his lips parting? Dragging his mouth away, he took a deep breath and shoved Dean off him. Hard. “Straight... really, straight here,” he managed, trying not to acknowledge it hadn’t been entirely unpleasant.

Dean stumbled back, "I don't like this any more than you do. Straight as well but it will get us both out of this."

“You’re not serious? You ARE serious.” Xander ran a nervous hand through his hair. “Gotta be a better way.” He walked to the bars, and gripped them with two hands. He didn’t want anything to do with the demons either. But a guy...

"Dude," Dean walked over, but not too close, "No one is gonna know. You think I would be doing this if I knew anyone would? But I can't think of any other way. And I'm doing this for my brother. Think of it... as for a good cause."

Xan leaned his head against the cool bars. What if he was stuck here forever. What if in one week... or one month... or one year, or whenever the hell he couldn’t take this place anymore, he agreed? And then Dean’s brother would already be dead and he wouldn’t have avoided this stupid, fucked up plan.

He looked over his shoulder, trying to convince himself. It was dark... couldn’t he just pretend in his head that he was with a woman? His heart knocked against his chest as he was caught in indecision. “I don’t know. I don’t know if I can go through with it. God damnit,” he hit his forehead against the bars.

"Listen, I know this isn't a good thing to say right now, but, sometimes we gotta do things we... don’t want to do. There was this one time, smoking hot demon chick, she had a rack... whew, I would have done her in a heartbeat, but she was a crossroad demon and she wanted to cut a deal. So I locked her in one of these. I cut a deal with her for her life and I ended up with demon tongue in my mouth... wasn't bad though. Too bad there aren't any purple nurples around where we could get wasted."

“Wasted... yeah that would be good.” He remembered drinking purple nurples once... the name sounded harmless, but he could never remember what happened next. Nervous as hell, Xander turned around, still keeping a deadly grip on one of the bars. “Or a magazine... you know... the kind I only read for the articles.” He swallowed. “When do we do this?”

"Dude, you still make that excuse? I didn't even know they had articles. Did you see miss October?" Dean grinned, "She had this... I think I have the picture somewhere..." Dean started digging around.

“You have Miss October’s picture?” Without thinking, Xander came up to him. “Something about women with thigh high stockings. How’d she lean back like that... all I could think of were those thighs squeezing around him and...” he blinked. “You just said that to... to get me going, didn’t you.” He rubbed the back of his neck, “I think its one of your better ideas... based on the only two ideas I’ve heard from you so far.”

Dean handed him the photo, "Yeah, well, it worked. And I was told once, I'm a helluvo PA." He chuckled.

The page out of the magazine was pretty crinkled, but Dean hadn’t been kidding. Course the light wasn’t great, and that was a bit frustrating too. Xander stared at it, trying to relax and think of the girl in the picture laying there in the cell, looking up at him with those ‘come fuck me’ eyes. “We’re really gonna do this?”

Dean moved up by him, "Just think of her. What do you think I have to do." He leaned in, his breath skimming along Xander’s bare neck.

“Okay... okay...” the paper shook in his hand. He swallowed hard, trying to imagine the heat he felt from Dean was from the woman’s body. “So... I’m stuck in a jail cell with her. There’s no one else around. She’s been her for ... for a long time. Alone... horny as hell... and she’s ... she’s looking at me.”

Dean wrapped his hand around Xander to the front of his pants, rubbing over his crotch. "Yeah, just imagine that." Dean's own imagination was working on it's own.

If he’d been alone, Xander would have been touching himself. Now it was Dean’s hand on him, kicking things up a notch. He held still, trying to get used to the motions, then looked at the picture again. “She wants me so bad, she’s moving her hips up and down. All she has on are the stockings, the heels... and that belt that keeps sliding up and down her bare belly.”

The blood rushed to Xander’s groin, big time. “I’m supposed to say no. That’s the rule... no sex in jail. But I can look... and I do... and she’s doing her best to get me to do more than look.”

"Yeah, she is, look how her hand moves down between her legs, knowing you know how hot she is for you." Dean was undoing his pants, "Can you feel her touching you?" He curled his hand around Xander's cock, stroking as only a guy or a very skilled woman knew how.

Dean moved, pushing up Xander's shirt so he could expose a little skin, "Just close your eyes, feel her lips on you," he kissed at the bare skin, at times nipping it.



Between the maddeningly slow strokes of his cock, and things Dean’s mouth was doing low on his belly, a low groan broke out of Xander as he involuntarily arched his hips forward. It shouldn’t feel so good... it shouldn’t, but fuck... it did.

The picture dropped from his nerveless fingers, and he gripped Dean... Dean’s jacket, just to hold on. He was half afraid to find out what it would feel like to be in a man’s mouth, and half afraid he’d never find out. “She begs me to take her. Begs me to fuck her.” As his language got rougher, so did his need. “Fuck... “

Dean glanced up, just once and was thankful it was dark. Now it was time to pull from his memory of what all the girls he had been with had done to him. He stopped listening to Xander and his rambling. Trying to keep his focus. Without giving himself any hesitation because if he did, he wouldn't be doing this at all. He flat licked up the length of Xander's cock. A shiver passed through him, he wasn't sure of the reason. Be it the taste of the man and him enjoying it or that it was the fact he was licking a man's cock and was now opening his mouth and taking him down.

A stranger’s voice filled the room. It took Xander's mind a few minutes to catch up... to realize it was his own voice, begging, pleading, cursing. Suddenly it didn't matter that that Dean looked nothing like a girl. All that mattered was he took him... all of him in his mouth, and he knew how to suck and tease and make it hurt so good. "Yeah... oh yeah... fuck..." the gutteral cries broke from Xander as he mindlessly thrust into Dean's mouth.

Dean had been taken a little by surprise, pulling back a bit as Xander thrusted. Then he caught the action, worked with it as his fingers reached to pull those pants down over hips, down thighs and to knees. He had to slide Xander down more, needed to see how he would take this. Dean pulled off, wetting his fingers before running them down along Xander's crack, finding his tight bud to rub his fingers over while his mouth distracted him once again.

Xander skittered between pleasure and panic. A part of him wanted this to go on forever, and another part knew what was coming... and it was unknown, and strange and unfair. Wasn't it enough that he was forced to stand here and be pleasured to within an inch of his life? Okay now, put like that, it didn't seem like much of a curse but... Just like that, he was dragged back into the moment. No longer able to keep his hands completely still, but needing support, he moved them over Dean's shoulders, up his chest... his throat... and fuck if he didn't like the feel of hard muscle under his palms, or the convulsion of Dean's throat as he kept sucking. "Just do it," he suddenly snapped, scared now by the betrayal of his body.


Dean dragged his mouth up, over Xander's shirt and up till he could taste the salt of skin and sweat. "Turn around," Dean whispered, his hands also enforcing his words. He was turning Xander around, making him face the bars as he moved his hands to push the younger man's pants the rest of the way down, all the way to his ankles.


As he did so, his hands moved over the masculine form. He allowed it to map every part. His chest. His hips. His thighs as well. Dean then moved his hands up, cupping that ass and just not thinking of what he was doing or who he was doing it to. Enjoy the moment. Take it in. It would only be something between him and Xander. So he nuzzled against those firm cheeks while pressing his thumbs and spreading him open. Moving his face forward, he used his tongue to wet Xander. Dean knew lube had to be used or he would tear at the man. So his tongue pressed, slopped and coated before he spit in his hand, wet his cock and then moved up.

"Hold on," he whispered, "And don't tense up, it will hurt us both." As he spoke, Dean was pressing his cock, rubbing then pressing again to work his crown in. This was gonna be painful... at the start but it should turn good later. Or so he hope, especially when his crown just popped in and the tightness, the heat nearly had Dean's legs buckling as he pressed his body against Xander and held him tightly while his breath caught.

Xander gripped the bars and arched back, crying out "Oh God... fucking hell..." It hurt so bad white flashed across his eyes. If it weren't for the fact that Dean kept talking to him, held him... if he weren't going so slow, Xander would probably have pushed him away and found satisfaction in his own hand. How could he still be hard with the guy part way up his ass? And how come thinking about how it must feel for Dean... having to wait... how come that made him get harder?

Dean was petting Xander as they were still for the moment. He was biting his own bottom lip, trying to control his breath and to keep from just tearing into the man. God, he was hot, tight, better than a virgin.

Then Dean started to move just a bit more, pushing in a little deeper. Gradually, he worked himself in until his hips were pressed to Xander’s round ass. He held Xander tightly as he nuzzled the short hairs at the back of his neck.

Xander’s biceps bulged as his fingers tightened and relaxed and tightened again around the bars with the rise and fall of the level of pain he experienced. The burning sensation got worse, before it eased a little bit. It was weird... like standing on the edge of something... knowing one more step and it might all be better, or a hundred times worse.

At the same time, the warmth of Dean’s breath on his neck, and feel of his hands... touching and stroking felt good. Maybe a bit too good. A whimper broke from Xander as he turned his head. “Dean. Can you kiss me again?” he asked, knowing it would take his mind off other things... such as how Dean’s cock seemed to be getting bigger and harder deep inside him.

Dean kept one hand down, gently but firmly stroking Xander's cock while his brought is other up to cup the man's face. He leaned in, tipping his head and brushing his lips over Xander’s before kissing him, gradually deepening the kiss.

As his tongue explored and probed, he moaned into Xander’s mouth and started to move. It was a slow draw back. Oh yeah, he was tight and it was so sweet. Dean didn't think it could be like this with a man. Damn.

Between the heated kiss, and the merciless stroking of his cock, Xander started to move his hips back and forth. When Dean started to rock with him ever so slow, it was a bit uncomfortable, but also exciting as hell... cause he was a guy, and knew how hard it had to be for Dean to control himself, to not fuck him up against the bars and say the hell with it. The guy’s need... the possibility that it would get the best of him... fuck... that was more powerful than a hundred dirty magazine pictures.

Forcing himself to relax, Xander pressed his ass back. A flash of pleasure so unexpected, so good, had him groaning and arching back. Releasing one of the bars, he put his hand back over his head, behind Dean’s head, encouraging him to come closer. “Again... right there... right there...” he begged, his voice cracking as another jolt of pleasure tore through him. “Anh... unh... fuck...”

Dean had found it, or perhaps they both did by accident but it had Xander shivering and begging. Dean wasn't gonna turn him down. His hips needed to move because his groin was on fire.

Dean started to make sure each stroke of his cock found that special gland men had. "Anything," He whispered.

“Oh God yes,” Xander gave a gutteral shout and bucked into Dean. Fuck... he’d never felt anything like this. He started to move back and forth... fucking Dean’s hand, bending slightly forward and slamming backwards into Dean. Every motion, every way he went... front... back... sent fire inching up through his system.

Leaning back, he dragged Dean closer, rubbing his mouth over the guy’s neck and jaw... wherever he could reach as he demanded more. “Harder...come on... please...”

"Don't want to... oh fuck," Dean groaned as sweat rolled down his neck. He didn't think he could control himself any more any way and was thankful Xander asked him to stop trying. Dean's hips powered back and into the man, slamming into him so hard that the sound of skin smacking came loud and clear. The motion of his hand as he stroked Xander's cock grew more needy, wanting, as he smeared the pre-cum leaking out to slick his hand. Next time he was gonna have to get Xander to cum so he could use it as lube. And it might be sweeter.

Wait... did he just think... NEXT TIME?

It was like being fucked from both sides... fucked so hard you couldn’t think. All Xander could do was ride the waves, squirming, fucking, demanding more, giving more. This was what if felt like to have someone in you so deep... someone strong, someone that could give as much as you could take. He was burning up, going down in flames, and didn’t give a shit anymore that he was with a guy. Fuck... he’d already been in hell... was in hell.

As the feelings intensified, he used the bar for leverage, pushing and pulling his body back and forth. His head rolled back, and he could see Dean... could see his grimace as he concentrated. “Yeah... oh yeah..” Close to coming, Xan closed his eyes.

Dean turned his head, seeing Xander closing his eyes. He grunted hard at one particular thrust he gave. Damn, his ass was sweet. Dean sank his teeth into Xander's neck, leaving a mark, he was sure, as he surged into him harder and harder. "Damn, you got a sweet ass." Dean licked up his neck, bit that earlobe then turned his head and kissed him.

Sweet ass. Not quite the words Xander would have imagined would trigger his orgasm. But here he was, hanging onto Dean, crying out against his mouth, and shuddering as he gave a few more thrust. He came apart so fast, it was unreal... and was that his voice... was he saying Dean’s name? Did it fucking matter? He hurt... and he felt good, all at once.

Dean gritted his teeth, he held back his cry as Xander released, squeezing him tightly. It was what triggered his own, and he spilled into Xander. He could feel his cum pushing out around him and drip down both their legs.

As Xander slowly came back to his senses, he managed to talk. “Not saying you got a sweet cock. Might be thinking it though.” Too tired, he couldn’t even move.

He held Xander to him, panting and trying to keep from falling. "Okay, you don't have to but... damn... who knew." Dean started to pull away, knowing he had to.

Xander half stumbled, but let Dean help him clean up.

Once he’d helped Xander pull his pants up, Dean suddenly pulled Xander down with him to the flooring and held him against his chest,

“Dean?” It was damned confusing. Xander kept trying to compartmentalize. Remind himself they were doing this for a cause. But little gestures like this broke down walls. And hell... he had nowhere to run even if he wanted to. Moving his face, he kissed Dean’s chest. “Are we cuddling? I mean I thought girls cuddle and guys have a smoke... or go watch a basketball game. I can still hear your heart.” He lifted his head.

Dean gave a chuckle, "I could just push you off but I don't think I have the strength and if we had a t.v., I wouldn’t be watching basketball, maybe Godzilla." He looked down as Xander kissed his chest. Upon the lift of his head, Dean leaned in and kissed him, "Com'on, as much as I would like to bask in this, we got some bitches to smirk at." He pushed him off gently and got up, grabbing Xander and pulling him up with him. "We are both free, it's a good thing."

Still dizzy... still confused, but heh, not like that was unusual for him, Xander let Dean pull him up. “Okay. Okay,” he nodded. Dean was right... the moment was over. They were guys, and guys didn’t... well they did only when they had to, and he and Dean no longer had to so... He took a breath. “Hope they keep their promise... curse... whatever”

* * *

[One week later]

Dean climbed out of the Impala, "Dude, I'm telling you, I was right."

Sam shook his head getting out, "You know, whatever. I'll buy the coffee."

Dean grinned as if he won some kind of award, "Damn straight." He pulled open the door and ran when Sam passed him. He was going into the coffee shop just as someone was coming out.

“Hey! Watch where you’re...” Xander suddenly lapsed into silence.

“Going. That’s what he meant,” Buffy filled-in. “Xan... you okay.”

“Sure. Okay.” His gaze was locked with Dean’s and he didn’t know quite what to say. Didn’t know what the guy had said to his brother, or anything. “Sorry...” he patted Dean’s shoulder, eyes questioning the other man’s.

Dean was about to speak but didn't say anything. He locked his green eyes with Xander, giving him a knowing look. He glanced over to the blonde then back to Xander, "It's okay, Dude."

"Dean?" Sam called back to him.

Dean just gave a nod to Xander, "Yeah, yeah, keep your shirt on, Sasquatch," he called out to his brother.

“Xan?” Buffy turned back to him.

“Coming.” Xander nodded back at Dean and followed Buffy out to the parking lot. The slight lump in his throat, the racing of his pulse... it was just a thing. He was catching something, that’s all.

Dean stood at the counter and as Sam ordered, Dean looked out. Thank god there was a pretty blonde there, his excuse even though he was more watching Xander and he could feel something inside him pull at him.

"Here," Sam handed Dean his coffee. He glanced out, "She has a boyfriend."

"You don't know that," Dean looked back out and sighed softly.


(A/N - Trying to decide whether its worth the trouble to post cross-overs, please comment and let us know)