Dark Side of Me

Disclaimerstyle='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>: I don't own style='mso-bidi-font-style:normal'>Buffy the Vampire Slayer. If you're
looking to sue somebody, just go away and leave me alone. I don’t want any.

Ratingstyle='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>: NC-17

Summarystyle='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>: When the
events of "Bad Girls" go a little differently, Buffy finds herself touching
her own dark side more intimately than she'd ever imagined… (Buffy/Faith)

Spoilersstyle='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>: Up through
"Bad Girls"

Author's
Note:style='mso-spacerun:yes'>  Every once in a while, I like to give myself
a challenge, something new to write—and femslash is
definitely something new to me. I don't know if I can pull it off, and for all
I know, it's completely trite and predictable compared to other class=SpellE>femslash out there, but here's my attempt. Feedback would
be appreciated.

Feedback and Archiving: Both are welcome, but if you haven't archived
one of my fics in the past, please ask permission before you do.

Contact Info: email: onmouseout="ClxTMo("addie")" id="clicksor_sp_addie">href="http://ads.clicksor.com/serving/search4.php?q=lWL-.%FD%2B%2A%25%FB%271+%26%7CYQT9%FA%26%29%22%FC&q3=%5BQTY_U0pS%5B%F9icNeS_MqW0%28%7E%7B%215%FD%2A.%21%FD&tl=3cd335c12b81ed23&pn=5b926d1ec754c54f&pid=16193&sid=22120&curl=http%3A%2F%2Fr.looksmart.com%2Fog%2Fpr%3DPsr%3Bro%3D1%3Brc%3D3%3Bdigest%3De000500fffe4fb498f2fe98d43ace9e2%3Bkid%3Dc63c8ad1214ca5c7fa4a85ff449498e7%3Bt%3D1161982508%3Bv%3D2%3Bdata%3D892f014609e4ef759a97858ba8ed88033f999a66e9177298%3Bla%3D470049%3Blm%3D465687%3Bkw%3D50069677%3Bed%3D%3Bqt%3Daddie%3Bvr%3D%3Blt%3DBM%3Bmt%3DE0%3Bip%3D%3Bpt%3D2%3Bii%3D212.3290.4542722c.2ff5%3Bpn%3D%3Bto%3D%3Btc%3D3%3Bpo%3D1%3Bpc%3D3%3Bpi%3Dckss1%3Bts%3D%7Chttp%3A%2F%2Fwww.monstermarketplace.com%2Fgooglesearchbls.asp%3Fq%3Daddie&cpx=cpc&sc=addie"
target="_blank" id=clicksor>addie_logan@yahoo.com
website: http://www.dark-desire.org/blood updates list:
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/addielogan/

*** *** ***

"I catch a chill when I look into your eyes

class=smalltext1>Something too familiar, I seem to recognize

class=smalltext1>Like lookin' in the mirror, baby

class=smalltext1>And I'm scared of what I see

class=smalltext1>Lookin' at you baby, is the dark side of me.

class=smalltext1> 

class=smalltext1>"There's two sides to every story

class=smalltext1>For every shame there's a glory

class=smalltext1>And I've tried to keep a balance

class=smalltext1>Between the dark and the light

class=smalltext1>But something don't add up

class=smalltext1>When I'm with you, how can two wrongs feel so right?"

class=smalltext1>               — "Dark Side of Me" by Alannah Myles

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>*** *** ***

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>Earlier
tonight, she'd felt the men surrounding them as they'd danced and known any one
of them would've been happy to take her home and alleviate the tension she
could build but not spend with Angel.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>But Buffy
Summers hadn't danced for them. She was dancing for herself. She couldn't remember a time when she'd felt like this,
when she'd felt so free. Suddenly, the burden of Slayerhood
didn't feel like, well, a burden.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>She'd brushed
up against the men as they'd approached her, but never for long, always moving
away before one could get too close. Yet her hand kept instinctively reaching for
someone, for another hand, a soft hand—not unlike her own.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>Even when
Angel had made his appearance, Buffy hadn't been with him for long. When their
business had been done, she'd turned and left with someone else.

class=GramE>With her…style='mso-bidi-font-style:normal'>

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>Buffy felt
brave in a way she hadn't before, facing the parts of herself
which had frightened her in the past. Ever since she'd been Called, she'd felt
the shadowy part of her Slayer nature churning inside of her, beckoning her to
a place that seemed too dark to embrace.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>Yet now, it was
if she was looking at her own darker nature come to life, and Buffy was finding
it to be something other than what she'd always expected. No longer
frightening, it had become alluring.

class=GramE>Seductive.style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>Even now, as
they ran from a crime scene and the wreckage they'd left behind, Buffy wasn't
afraid of what she saw—what she felt.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>"I think
we're gonna have to call off the armed siege tonight, B," Faith declared
as they stopped in an alley to catch their breath after escaping the cops who
had caught them breaking into a weapon's shop.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>Buffy leaned
forward, her hands resting above her knees. "It's not like Balthazar's
going anywhere," she agreed. "Besides, it's getting late. I should go
home."

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>"Your
house is all the way across town," Faith pointed out.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>"Yeah,
and?" Buffy asked, pulling up and wiping a loose strand of blonde hair
from her face.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>"style='mso-bidi-font-style:normal'>And there's probably cops looking for
you right now." Faith jerked her thumb backwards. "My place is right
over there. Why don't you crash there tonight, lay low for a bit?”

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>Buffy felt her
familiar trepidation creeping up again. "I don't think I should. My
mom—she'll worry."

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>"Yeah,
and just think how she'll respond to you showing up in handcuffs."

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>Buffy worried
her lip between her teeth. Faith did have a point there. But…

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>Her thoughts
stopped abruptly when Faith's hand wrapped around her wrist. Buffy's skin
tingled at the contact and she looked up, trying to meet Faith's eyes but
seeing only dark circles in the unlit alley.

class=GramE>"Yeah.style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'> Let's
go."

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>As they began
to walk, Buffy felt the hand around her wrist slip, though instead of dropping
away, slim fingers intertwined with hers. The hand she held now was so
different from ones she’d known in the past, none of the thick, masculine bulk
she'd become accustomed to.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>In the
shadows, she couldn't tell her fingers from the others.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>Buffy felt her
hand be released as they reached the motel room door and she listened as Faith
worked the key in the lock, cursing under her breath as it stuck for a moment.
Then, the door opened with a rush, and Buffy crinkled her nose at the musty
smell inside.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>"Come on
in," Faith said, stepping past the threshold and spreading her arms wide.
"Mi rat trap is style='mso-bidi-font-style:normal'>su rat trap."

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>Buffy smirked
then stepped inside, shutting the door behind her. She turned and looked
towards it, her hand hesitating on the lock for a moment before she clicked it
shut and pulled the chain across.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>Her skin was
humming in a way Buffy wasn't used to, her body pent up with energy despite all
she'd done to work it off that evening. She chalked it up to their brush with
the wrong side of law and ensuing less-than-legal
escape, and began to move around, trying to release the coil in the pit of her
stomach.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>She stopped
short when she caught sight of herself in the mirror and moved closer to it,
frowning as she noticed a large cut on her arm. Blood had dried around it
already, and Buffy ran her fingers over it to see if any fresh was coming from
the wound. It wasn't.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>"How long
as this been here?" she wondered out loud.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>"Since
that nest earlier," Faith replied. "It's not fatal."

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>Faith's
fingers grazed the cut, making Buffy shiver slightly. She looked class=GramE>up, her eyes meeting Faith's as they were reflected back to
her in the glass. Dark met light, and Buffy trembled again.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>Buffy felt
Faith's hand trailing over her skin, down her arm to graze the swell of Buffy's
breast. Buffy gasped, her body growing stiff. She wondered if she'd imagined
the touch until Faith's hand repeated its movement, only with the graze
becoming a full grope.

class=GramE>"Faith?style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'> What are you
doing?" Buffy asked, finding her feet unwilling to move from the spot.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>"Want,
take, have, B," Faith replied, her voice low and sultry.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>Before Buffy
could respond, Faith had turned her face towards her, the soft hand on Buffy's
cheek sure and steady. "Want, take, have," Buffy heard herself echo
as she gave into the pull of Faith's mouth.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>She hadn't
expected the lips against hers to be so soft, so unmistakably feminine. Buffy
wondered fleetingly if this is what a man felt when he kissed her, before
Faith's tongue swept into her mouth and she couldn’t think of anything but the
moment. The act was more sensual than Buffy had realized it could class=GramE>be, the inherent tenderness of the kiss, despite the firm
pressure from Faith's lips, affecting her more than she would have expected.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>Strong, sure
hands gripped Buffy's arms, guiding her back to the bed. Her legs hit the side
a moment before the women tumbled down to the mattress, falling together in a
tangle of limbs.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>Faith pulled
up, her lips now alternating kisses and nips against Buffy's jaw line, and
Buffy turned her head, looking at their hair as it mingled together on the
pillow, blonde and dark, dark brown. She reached up, touching the strands
together, feeling them slip like silk through her fingers.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>She gasped
when Faith pulled Buffy's shirt over her head, exposing her bare breasts to the
cool air in the room. Faith grinned wickedly, her dark eyes sparkling. "No
bra? Naughty girl," she teased with a wink.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>Buffy's mouth
seemed to turn up in a smirk on its own accord, and she pushed her breasts
forward, feeling the nipples crinkle into peaks, pointing upwards greedily.
Faith smirked back as she pulled her own shirt over her head, baring her
breasts to Buffy's gaze.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>Buffy's focus
moved to the generous, dusky-tipped mounds. It was different, seeing bare
breasts from this angle, watching them as they stood firm and proud in front of
her. Seeing where Buffy's eyes were, Faith's grin grew, and she pushed her
chest forward. "Like what you see, baby?"

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>She did, and
with a nod, she let Faith know. For once, she didn't want to analyze, didn't
want to go over and over in her head about whether this was right or wrong.
Faith had showed her how to tap into something inside of herself, to succumb to
the pleasure in her Calling.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>Again, Buffy
marveled at the softness of Faith's full lips, this time as they wrapped around
a nipple. She gasped, her hand falling between them, finding Faith's nipple and
pulling it in tandem with the tugs of Faith's mouth.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>When Faith's
long, slender fingers slipped beneath Buffy's dampened panties, she arched into
the touch without thought, the feeling so similar to when she touched herself
there, late at night alone in her bed. Yet with it was the accompanying thrill
of a different hand, the surprise of not knowing exactly which touch was coming
next.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>Buffy closed
her eyes, arching her hips and allowing herself to get
lost in sensation, to simply feel for
once. When Faith's hand receded, Buffy whimpered, then
sighed in pleasure again when Faith quickly slipped off the blonde’s pants then
put her fingers back.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>"Damn, B…
You're really getting off on this," Faith said with a chuckle and a toss
of her hair. She slid two fingers down, running them over Buffy's clit before
pushing them inside with ease, feeling the rush of liquid around them.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>Buffy's only
response was a moan and a buck of her hips. The feel of soft, slender fingers
inside of her was so familiar, and at the moment, it didn't matter to her who
they belonged to. She wanted this, wanted to remember what it was like to let
go and give into reckless desire.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>She'd been so
lost in the pleasure of Faith's fingers pumping inside of her that she didn't
realize what the other woman had planned before she felt the flick of her
tongue against the swollen bead of her clit. She gasped in surprise and delight
as her eyes opened again, moving down to meet Faith's own dark brown ones.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>The brunette
Slayer smirked around Buffy's clit, her fingers still making their steady push
in and out of the other woman's cunt. Buffy didn't turn her gaze away; no blush
stained her cheeks. She was spread open above the dingy motel sheets and had no
desire but to revel in her own wantonness.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>Tonight, Faith
had shown her the joy in embracing her dark side, and Buffy didn't want to turn
from it again.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>In fact, she
wanted more.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>"Faith…"
Buffy moaned, the other Slayer's name fading into a gasp. "I want…"
Her words trailed off as Faith suckled her clit, and for a moment, Buffy was
lost completely. Then, she remembered.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>"I want
to taste you, too."

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>Faith pulled
up, the positively wicked smile on her face growing. "Well, look at little
miss Buffy wanting to eat pussy."

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>Buffy didn't
respond verbally to Faith's teasing. Instead, she ran her tongue slowly,
sensually over her lips, her own eyes growing dark. Faith's smirk fell as she
saw what was reflecting back at her through the blonde Slayer's eyes.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>Without
another word Faith stood and stripped off the rest of her clothes. She turned
as she got back on the bed, positioning her pussy over Buffy's waiting mouth.
Immediately, Buffy reached up to grab hold of Faith's hips, pulling her down
hard, not hesitating as she shoved her tongue into Faith's wet hole.

class=GramE>"class=SpellE>Uhn, style='mso-bidi-font-style:normal'>yeah!"style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'> Faith cried
out, her voice hoarse and throaty. The sound only spurred Buffy on, made her lap
eagerly inside the dark Slayer, moaning as her juices flowed into her mouth.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>Faith hadn't
quite known what to expect when the idea had popped into her head to seduce
Buffy, but she was certainly happy with the results. Yet never one to be
outdone, she leaned back down, her mouth returning to Buffy's dripping cunt
with renewed fervor.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>They fell into
an unspoken synch, the rhythm of their undulating tongues meshing until Buffy
felt almost as if she were creating her own pleasure. With every pass of her tongue
over Faith's clit, she felt it passed on to her own as Faith met her move for
move. Every gasp, moan, and scream was a couplet, separate voices becoming
echoes.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>Buffy's orgasm
began as a tremor, pressure building as she felt Faith begin to shake against
her mouth. Together, a crescendo rose, engulfing them both, waves breaking. She
lost any sense of separateness, her body feeling as if it was becoming part of
the other woman's. In a fleeting thought before she fell fully over the edge
into mindlessness, Buffy felt a peace inside of her, as if the force of the
Slayer was whole again.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>Faith rolled
over, panting, her body flushed as it struggled to regain its usual rhythm.
Already, something deep inside of Buffy was rebelling at the lack of contact,
and she realized she'd awakened something tonight, something she'd fought a
losing battle to keep contained.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>She'd seen it
in Faith's eyes that first night, seen the darkness that so frightened her
peering out from behind her eyes, reminding Buffy of what she fought to
control. But tonight, she'd stopped running, stopped fighting. Open wide, she'd
embraced the darkness.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>Now she
wanted—needed—more.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>Buffy turned,
her mouth going to the crook of Faith's neck, her tongue lapping a long path
against salty skin. "Faith…"
she whispered, the word coming as a breathy moan. "I
need to be inside you…"

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>Faith turned
to look at Buffy through hooded eyelids, and finally, Buffy could look at her
own dark reflection without fear. She'd meant her words with a literalness she
wasn't sure she could explain, and she was grateful she didn't have to. She
wanted to open her up, crawl inside, and lose herself in the beautiful peace
the dark offered.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>For once,
Faith had nothing to say. She suddenly felt vulnerable, this experience having
become something she hadn't expected. Buffy wasn't looking at her. She was
looking through her.
"I…you…"

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>"Shh…"
Buffy whispered. She pressed her lips against Faith's, tasting her own self on
Faith's mouth. "It's okay," she said softly, moving up but staying
close enough that Faith could feel Buffy's warm breath stirring on her skin.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>Faith nodded,
letting her legs fall open again. They were…

class=GramE>Onestyle='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>.style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>

class=GramE>One
Slayer in every generation. Only One.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>Buffy moved
slowly down the body beneath her, never allowing for a second they weren't touching.
She settled between Faith's legs and rested her hand against her smooth, bare
pussy. She acted on instinct, the desire to connect with her lost half fueling
every move.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>On her knees
now, she looked down at Faith, meeting dark eyes again before she slid a finger
inside, feeling her way. A sharp rush of breath passed Faith's lips, and Buffy
added another, a pulsing desire to fill and be filled. To connect again with
pieces lost.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>"I made
you," Buffy whispered, though the words were not spoken between the girls.
It was Slayer to Slayer, an acknowledgement of the rift and the need for
reunion. "I made you in death."

class=GramE>A
third finger, followed quickly by a fourth.style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'> Hard, steady
pushes now.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>"Yes…"
Faith moaned, both in response and in pleasure. For a moment, her head fell
back, her eyes closed, but when Buffy's fingers slammed inside hard, she
returned her gaze to Buffy's.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>Her eyes
weren't green anymore. Her pupils had grown, covering the irises until they
were as dark as Faith's own.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>Buffy's thumb
joined her fingers, her hand sliding deeper. Her free hand slipped between her
own legs, moving in time with her thrusts inside of Faith.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>When the heel
of Buffy’s hand pushed inside of her, Faith yelled, the sound something akin to
primal. It spurred Buffy on, her fingers blazing over her clit as she fucked
Faith mercilessly with her hand, reveling in every moan, every scream she
wrenched from the Slayer beneath her.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>Again, they
came together, and for a blissful moment, Buffy felt like she style='mso-bidi-font-style:normal'>had been able to crawl inside of Faith,
to find wholeness in her fragmented,
strained existence.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>Reluctantly,
she let her hand slip away, but fell onto Faith's chest, needing the
connection, the touch. Sex hung heavily in the still air, yet Buffy didn't
rebel against breathing it in.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>Faith's
fingers ran unexpectedly through her hair, and Buffy looked up, relieved now to
see what had always been reflected in her eyes.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>She leaned in
and caught her lips.

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>*** *** ***

style='font-family:Arial;mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"'>Well, that’s
my attempt at femslash. I hope I was able to pull it
off… Leave a review and let me know what you thought of the fic!