Too Soon

Disclaimer: It belongs to Joss, ME, the WB (grumbles).
Distribution: My site and for TopazAngel hope this helps! If you want it, ask.
Thanks: to Poison for being a wonderful, and very talented, beta.

*** Marks are for emphasis
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Angel entered the high school library without a sound. He had only been back about a month and felt weird about being here. He had killed the woman that Giles loved and had tortured the man. Shaking his head, Angel stopped those thoughts. No more brooding... okay, *less* brooding.

Angel looked around and saw that Willow was sitting at the computer with Giles hovering over her, glaring at the computer while looking for information. Willow, she'd put his soul back and for that he would be forever grateful. He remembered the second week that he was back and she had come to him, telling him that his soul was permanent. He'd begged her not to tell anyone, saying that he wanted to be the one to do it.

His gaze shifted and he looked at Buffy; the slayer, the woman that he had once loved. He could still feel the blade of the sword going threw his stomach and then the pain; the endless pain that was Hell. He knew that she had done it to save the world but how can you still love someone after that? How can you hug them and love them knowing that they sent you to hell?

Shaking his head again, Angel looked over at the table. Oz was sitting there with an old book in his hands, obviously bored. He had talked to the musician a little bit since coming back and he couldn't help but like him. Oz had told him that he understood that it wasn't Angel, it was the *thing* inside of him, he could relate. The werewolf didn't flinch around him and for that, he was grateful.

There was an empty seat at the table, the one that Cordelia used to sit in. Xander had told him what had happened. After he had lost his soul, Cordy had freaked. Less than a week after Angelus made an appearance, the whole Chase family was gone to L.A. Odd, they didn't seem to miss her much.

Next to Cordelia's old seat sat Faith, the newest member of the 'Scooby Gang'. Faith was a slayer, but not like Buffy. Faith may lack the experience but she more than made up for it with skill. She also didn't treat everyone like they were shit compared to her. Faith acted like a true slayer, not a cheerleader on a power kick.

Finally his gaze landed on the dark haired, brown-eyed boy. Xander. Angel still couldn't believe everything that had happened between the two of them. Xander had come to the mansion one day while Buffy was working with Giles. They had talked . . .a lot. Angel had slowly opened up to the boy and they ended up swapping stories. Angel would tell Xander about himself as a human, Liam, and Xander would tell Angel about Jesse and the years before Buffy came.

Angel was shocked out of his thoughts when he heard a high-pitched squeal, "Angel! You're here!"

Angel stood stock still as the bouncing blond slayer enveloped him in a hug. Buffy didn't notice his lack of enthusiasm or Xander's hard glare. She was too busy hugging *her* Angel.

Giles stepped back from Willow and just gave Angel an appraising look. Willow quickly looked up and said, "Oh! Hey Angel, are you here to get the scoop on the big evil?"

Buffy *finally* let go of Angel and he sent a smile at Willow, "Yeah, you know, gotta keep up on the bad guy situation."

"Yeah, like you not becoming one of them," Faith said sarcastically, she'd come to accept the soulled vampire.

Oz got up and gave Angel a grin. They shared one of those handshakes with a half pat on the back for good measure as Oz said, "Hey man, good seeing ya."

Shaking his head Angel sat down next to Xander at the table. Buffy went to sit on his lap but Angel quickly moved his chair so that wasn't possible. Instead Buffy just pulled up the chair next to him. 'It's not much but it's something,' Angel thought to himself, thankful that she wasn't on top of him.

"So, what's going on?" Angel asked, not liking the silence.

"A nest of vampires in Oakfield Cemetery. You and Buffy should be able to handle it, but we'll tag along, just in case," Giles said, cleaning his glasses.

"That's okay Giles, Angel and me can handle it," Buffy said, wanting to have some alone time with Angel.

"No, Buffy I think that it's a good idea that they come along," Angel said quickly, too quickly.

No one seemed to notice except for Faith who gave him that knowing look, the one that he'd been getting for the last week or so. Faith knew, some how Faith knew. She might not know *everything* but she knew enough.

"Right, so, weapons all around?" Xander said with fake cheer.

"All right," Buffy said with a pout.

"I think that maybe we should split up, you know, before we get there," Angel said as they all went to get stakes.

"That's a good idea Angel," Giles said with a genuine smile, he quickly realized what he was doing and stopped smiling, "Buffy why don't you take Willow and Oz, I'll go with Faith, and Xander can go with Angel."

"Well I could go with Angel," Buffy said hopefully.

"No, I think that we should split up the people with supernatural powers all around," Giles said, trying to make his slayer see reason, not hormones.

"Giles is right Buffy, we wouldn't want anything to happen to anyone," Angel said, quickly supporting the librarian.

With a huff Buffy gave up. The 'Scooby Gang' quickly made their way out of the library and to the cemetery. Once they got there they split up into their teams.

Angel and Xander walked for about five minutes before Xander pushed the older vampire up against a hard stonewall. Angel dropped his stakes and wrapped his arms around Xander's waist. Xander reached up kissed *his* Angel, hard.

Pulling back for breath Xander said, "I hate seeing her all over you. I can't stand it!"

Angel ran his hands up and down Xander's back, trying to calm him. "I know! It's not like *I'm* enjoying it! But what are we going to do? We already know that they won't accept us."

Xander dropped his head and rested it against Angel's shoulder. "I know but that doesn't mean that I have to like it."

Absentmindedly Angel ran his fingers through Xander's silky hair. "God, I can't wait till graduation."

Sighing, Xander nodded his head. "Yeah, once I graduate we can move away from this *horrible* town and on to a different one."

Chuckling Angel said, "Yeah, off to L.A. We'll be free."

Xander’s head shot up as he heard Buffy yelling from somewhere in the trees.

“We found the mausoleum, come on!”

The two shot apart and soon after Buffy, Giles, Faith, Willow, and Oz came through the trees. Buffy walked up to Angel and wrapped her arm around his. No one but Angel heard the small growl that Xander released. Buffy, oblivious to the fact that Angel didn’t give a damn, was prattling on about something at school.

The group started walking and Xander hung behind as Giles, Willow, and Oz took the front and Buffy pulled Angel along behind them. Faith nudged Xander’s elbow, knocking him out of his glaring trance.

“You know, you’ve been shooting daggers at B all night,” Faith said with a small smile.

Putting on a happy-go-lucky grin Xander said, “I’m just concerned about her, you know with Angel and all. I’m *really* not a big fan of Angelus.”

“Uh huh? And that’s why you looked like you wanted to tear her throat out tonight in the library when she went to sit on Fang’s lap?”

Xander didn’t know what to say, so he just looked at the ground.

“Yeah, that’s what I thought. Judging from how Angel’s been reacting to her, I’d say that he’s not a big fan himself,” Faith said, pretending not to notice when Xander’s head shot up.

“Faith,” Xander said, scared that she was going to say something to the others.

“Don’t worry kid, I got your back. Hey you and Fang want to be together? Good for you. I’m just saying, be careful. B ain’t gonna take this lying down. If you catch my drift,” Faith said, patting him on the back.

Xander looked at her like she had just saved his life, but before he could say anything they were in front of the mausoleum.

“Looks like we’re gonna have ourselves a party,” Faith said, slipping into a fake southern drawl.

Xander shook his head and pulled out his stake. Faith was surprised with how confident he looked. She was used to Xander being the one who hung back, was unsure of himself. ‘Damn, that vamp must be doing something good for him,’ Faith mused. Xander looked like a quiet, but dangerous cat, ready to pounce.

They stopped in front of the mausoleum with the rest of the gang and Buffy started issuing orders, “Me, Angel, and Faith will go in first. Giles come in with Willow and Oz behind you,” Buffy then turned to Xander and said in a dismissive tone, “Xander, stay in back.”

Xander was fuming as the first three went inside. After about a minute, Xander went in after them following Giles, Oz, and Willow. Buffy, Faith, and Angel were barley holding their own against the fifty or so vampires. Giles started picking off the weaker ones while Oz and Willow double-teamed them.

Xander was pissed. He quickly entered the fray and dusted five easily. He started fighting with a stronger vampire, in plain view of the others. Xander was holding his own well and starting to overtake the vampire.

“Oh my god, Xander!” Xander heard Willow cry as he got a sharp kick in the face. He could also see Buffy coming up to dust the vampire.

Without flinching from the kick, Xander punched the vampire in the face. As the vampire moved backwards from the blow he kicked it hard in the stomach. The vampire bent over in pain and Xander brought his knee up and pushed the vampire’s head down. Xander quickly had him on the ground and dusted him.

As he stood up Xander could see that everyone had shocked expressions on their faces, except for Angel who just looked proud. Xander couldn’t help but preen just a little bit under his vampire’s gaze.

“Oh my god, Xander, where did you learn how to do that?” Willow said as she walked over to her friend, who wasn’t even breathing hard.

Xander shrugged and said off handedly, “Dead Boy’s been showing me a few moves.”

“What!” Buffy cried in outrage, “You offered to give Xander *fighting* lessons?”

“Actually I asked him to Buff, what’s the big deal,” Xander said, truly confused at his friend’s actions. He had expected her to be happy, proud even but she was just pissed.

Ignoring Xander Buffy turned to Angel. “So you’ve been brushing me off to teach *Xander* how to fight?”

Angel could feel the stolen blood in his veins start to boil. She was mad, *MAD*? One of her best friends was less likely to get killed now that he knew how to fight and she was mad?

“Buffy, I should think that you would be happy. Xander is now better equipped to protect himself from the things of the night. We should be thanking Angel,” Giles stepped in, upset by his slayer’s behavior.

“Yeah B, I mean Xander really kicked some ass!” Faith said, as she put her arm around the dark haired boy.

Fidgeting under their gazes Buffy said, “I know, I guess I’m just being a little, you know, possessive.”

‘Wonder what she would do if she found out that *her* Angel isn’t hers anymore?’ Faith thought; barley suppressing a laugh.

“Well, you all should probably get home,” Giles said as he looked at his watch.

“That’s a good idea, all the little kiddies have school tomorrow,” Faith said with a smile, “Hey B, why don’t you take home the two little love birds, I’ll make sure Giles gets home alright, and I’m sure Fang won’t mind taking Superman home.”

“But *I* want to go with *my* Angel,” Buffy whined.

“Buffy, what good with that do? It is smartest to separate our strengths into groups. I don’t think that a slayer needs a body guard to escort her home,” Giles said in a harsh tone.

“Fine,” Buffy said as she motioned for Oz and Willow to follow.

“Bye Wolf Boy, bye Red,” Faith called as the started off.

“Bye guys,” Willow said with wave, Oz just smiled.

“Bye Wills, bye Oz,” Xander called back.

“I’ll see you two later,” Faith said as Giles started off, “Have fun.”

Angel didn’t miss the knowing look in Faith’s eyes. Faith laughed as she saw his eyes get huge and put a finger over her mouth. Angel was obviously confused by this so Faith just pointed at Xander. He couldn’t get anything else from the dark slayer because they had disappeared into the trees.

Angel turned and saw Xander laughing. Realization struck and he said in a disbelieving tone, “Did you tell her?”

Xander shook his head and said, “No, she figured it out. She’s alright with it though, she just said to be careful.”

“Be careful?” Angel said, relieved that she was all right with it and wouldn’t tell anyone.

“Buffy. She doesn’t want anything bad to happen,” Xander explained as the two started off.

Smiling slightly Angel said, “You know, I think that I like her.”

Xander shook his head and smiled up at Angel. Without saying anything Angel put his arm around Xander’s shoulders and Xander wrapped his arm around Angel’s waist.

The cemetery wasn’t far from Xander’s house and they were there within five minutes. They slowly walked up the driveway and around the back.

“Well, at least we didn’t run into any vamps,” Xander said as he pulled down the latter to his window.

Without answering, Angel pressed Xander against the wall once he had turned around. Smiling, Angel dropped his head and kissed the mouth of the boy, no man, which he was slowly falling in love with.

The two jumped apart as they heard a horrible shriek. “What the hell!”

They had been so occupied with each other that they hadn’t seen, or heard, the slayer approach. Xander wasn’t worried about his parents hearing, they would be passed out by now.

“Buffy,” Angel said as he looked at the slayer in horror. ‘No! Oh god, she wasn’t supposed to find out. We were going to wait until graduation and then just leave, we were going to be happy!’ Angel thought, scared for his Love, not himself.

“What the hell is going on here?” Buffy said as she stared at the two dark haired men in front of her.

“Well, it’s a bit obvious what they were doing B,” Faith said as she walked out of the trees behind Buffy.

“You knew?” Buffy said incredulously.

Faith raised her hands in mock surrender. “Hey, I just found out tonight.”

“This cannot be happening! This is because of a spell! It must be a spell,” Buffy reasoned with herself.

“Buffy there isn’t spell,” Angel said calmly, “Xander and I have been seeing each other for a few weeks now.”

“No! You’re dating me!” Buffy said as she pointed a finger at him.

“Buffy, I haven’t been dating you. You seemed to automatically think that I would start dating you again but I don’t want to. I’m sorry but I’m not in love with you anymore,” Angel said to the enraged slayer.

Shaking, Buffy said, “What! When did you stop loving me? We were supposed to have an immortal love!”

“I stopped loving you the moment that sword pierced through my stomach,” Angel answered honestly, “and the only thing immortal about *our* love was me.”

Faith watched from her perch against a tree. Buffy looked like she was about to explode and Faith was glad that she had nicked Buffy’s stake as she walked by. She could tell that they hadn’t planned this, telling Buffy that is. They were probably just going to run off after graduation, no shame in that. Angel was trying to stay calm but Faith knew that it wouldn’t last long. Knowing Buffy, she would say something horrible about Xander and Fang would loose his cool. Speaking of Xander, he was standing like a statue, watching it as if he wasn’t really there.

“That’s not fair!” Buffy cried, “I had to! If I didn’t than the world would have died!”

“I know! I don’t hold it against you. But for gods sake Buffy, how could I keep loving the person that sent me to hell?” Angel said as he threw his hands up into the air.

“So what, you decided to go for the useless piece of trash to get back at me?” Buffy didn’t even see the fist that came at her face. She was sprawled out on the ground, not three seconds after she made her comment.

‘Bingo! Fang looses his cool,’ Faith thought to herself, ‘Now, what’s Xander gonna do?’

Buffy looked up at Angel in shock as he came to kick her in her gut. She got ready for the blow, knowing that she couldn’t move fast enough to evade it. But it didn’t come. She looked up to see Xander holding onto Angel’s arm.

“No! It’s not worth it,” Xander said as he pulled Angel back.

Buffy got up and looked at them, just looked at them. Then she started to laugh.

“What’s so funny?” Xander asked, still holding Angel back.

“I was just thinking how stupid this is. What should I be worried about? It’s not like you can *really* be together,” Buffy said, still laughing.

Faith raised an eyebrow and said, “Um, B, you do know that guys can have sex with each other right? I mean it’s not the same but it’s pretty much the same idea. Girls have hole. . Guys have a hole.”

Buffy looked disgusted at the mention of gay sex, “No, I mean they *can’t*. If Angel actually loves him, then they can’t. Hello, happiness clause.”

Faith bit her lip, not happy about it, but admitting that Buffy was right. Xander and Angel just looked guilty.

“Actually, Buffy, there isn’t one,” Xander said, biting his lip.

“What?” Buffy said, obviously confused.

“When Willow put my soul back, there wasn’t one. She told me after I came back and I asked her not to tell anyone. I wanted to be the one who said something or didn’t,” Angel said going to stand in front of Xander, just incase Buffy tried something.

Buffy just looked shocked. “What?” she repeated.

Xander pushed back Angel, not liking the fact that he felt like he had to protect him, “Buffy, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to fall for Angel. I went to the mansion to talk to him, give him a chance. I thought that if you *really* wanted to be with him than I’d have to deal with him eventually. So, I went. We ended up talking about, well, everything. Angel ended up telling me about how his soul is permanent and that he asked Willow not to say anything. I’m not sure how it happened but we ended up kissing and I liked it, I liked it a lot.”

Buffy looked at him with obvious rage, “And that’s just supposed to make it okay? You give me some weak ass story about how you ‘grew together’ and I’m supposed to accept this with open arms? You stole the man that I love!”

Angel and Faith were too slow and Xander didn’t even see her coming. Buffy was on top of him, punching him. Xander tried to throw her off but he couldn’t. Faith and Angel quickly pulled Buffy off but Buffy got a kick in as they pulled her off.

Xander crunched up in pain as he felt his ribs break. Suddenly it was hard to breath, almost impossible. Gasping, Xander tried to say something but nothing would come out. He finally got enough strength to talk but it ended up making him cough, hard. He could see the blood on the ground and feel it in his throat.

Angel knew something was wrong when he smelled blood. He looked over to see Xander curled up in a ball, coughing, and trying to breathe. He ran over and dropped to his knees. He pulled Xander onto his back a gasped in horror. There was a dent, a huge one, in the shape of a boot heel. The dent wasn’t big but the position was what made it deadly. Her boot had broken at least three of his ribs, two covering his lungs and one covering his heart.

“No!” Angel screamed as he watched Xander cough up more blood.

Hearing Angel’s cry Faith stopped kicking Buffy and rushed over to his side. She saw the dent and looked at Angel with horror filled eyes. Knowing that she couldn’t do anything Faith started to sob; heart breaking, gut wrenching sobs.

“Oh god,” Xander got out, the coughing stopping for a little while, “It hurts, oh god, it hurts.”

“Xander, listen to me, you have to hold on,” Angel said, not daring to move him.

“It hurts.”

“No! Xander, hold on,” Angel begged as bloody tears started to run down his face.

Faith had dropped to her knees and was still sobbing. She had come to like, hell maybe even love, Xander. He was a good kid, goofy, funny, and forever forgiving. She’d never had real friends, but Xander, Oz, Willow, and Buffy, okay not so much Buffy, were starting to make Sunnydale feel like home. Now, he was dieing.

Xander stopped moving. He stopped coughing, stopping moaning, stopped breathing. Angel pulled the dead boy into his arms, holding him tightly, as the rain started to fall.

It wasn’t a light sprinkle; it was a down pore. It was as if the very heavens were crying for the loss of it’s goofy, grinning, child. A child who had grown up more in one year of his life, than many do ten. He had learned of the evils that loomed in the darkness and had fought them. He faced evils that the strongest men would run away from and hadn’t flinched. He had been told that he couldn’t and had conquered. He had been taken, in a rage, by the one that was supposed to protect him because he had found love.

***
Angel stood looking at it, the tombstone. It was simple, but with depth, just like the boy that it was made for. Alexander Lavelle Harris, born: 1981, died: 1998. He grew up too fast and we taken far too early.

He didn’t know how long it had been since Xander had died, time had stopped for him. All he knew was that it was still raining; it hadn’t stopped since that night. The others had gone home hours ago, knowing that he would stay. They had made it a night funeral so that he could go to it. Faith had explained to them that Xander and Angel were going out and then about how Xander had died.

They had been horrified to find out that Buffy had killed him in a fit of rage. Buffy, had looked stunned, but had never apologized. The council had come and taken her away, saying that she’d be put somewhere where she couldn’t hurt anyone else.

The whole gang had showed, no one caring about the rain. Willow had cried and so had Oz. Oz had held his girlfriend even as the tears ran down his own face. Giles had outright wept for the loss of one of his ‘children’. Even Cordelia had made the trip from L.A.; she had fallen to the ground crying. She may not be dating him anymore, but that didn’t mean that she didn’t care about him. Faith was holding, and being held, by Cordelia. The two girls found solace in each other and were grateful for the comfort.

The Scooby’s weren’t the only ones that came though. The whole high school must have come to the funeral. Many of them remembered Willow, Jesse, and Xander from before high school, the Three Musketeers. They also knew what Xander did, what they all did. They may not know everything about the things in the shadows, but they knew enough to know that he had helped protect them and they were all grateful to him.

They were all long gone now though; tucked into their beds, safe and warm. Angel turned around and faced the horizon, a little bit of sun already poking out. He watched as the sky turned colors and the stars started to disappear. He felt the warmth of the sun, its purifying rays warming him as only the hands of his beloved boy had. He closed his eyes as he felt something that he hadn’t felt in over two hundred years, the sun on his face and then he turned to ash.