Reflections

Disclaimer: Characters portrayed in this story are the creation of Joss Whedon. As was the show itself, this is just fantasy, written within the confines of the Adult Fan Fic (AFF) website, for review by other authors on the site and adult internet surfers. It's also my first attempt at contributing to this vast library and I welcome reviews.

Timeline: Sometime during Season 6, after Buffy began having regular sex with Spike. Some flashback memories to Season 3. In the story, Buffy is alone in her kitchen but she's remembering some of her sexual encounters with Spike...without ever consciously planning to, Buffy pleasures herself to her dirty thoughts.

"Isn't it funny how slaying makes you hungry and horny..." Faith's words echoed over and over again in the young woman's memory as she ravenously demolished the left over pizza from the previous night's dinner. Buffy the vampire slayer stood at the kitchen counter, alone in the dark. She was covered in mud, grass stains and a familiar chalky dust. Her once white blouse was nothing more than a wrinkled rag, torn at the rear of her right shoulder, and there was blood trickling from a cut above her left eye. Her normally shiny, soft blond locks were caked with mud, soaked with sweat, and hanging haphazardly from the barrette barely clinging to the back of her head. She had just spent the last three hours hunting and battling a nest of vamps who had been wreaking havoc on the locals for the better part of a month, always managing to elude a confrontation by staying one step ahead of the slayer--until tonight. Buffy finally found the murdering monsters and unleashed a furious ass whipping, taking out no less than six of the blood suckers in the fierce combat. She was exhausted and every muscle in her body screamed in pain. She was hungry too, but also something else...she was very, very horny.

"...Slaying makes you hungry and horny." When Buffy first heard those words more than three years ago, it was a much more innocent time in her life. She was 17, and a senior in high school. And although she had given up her virginity to Angel, the vampire cursed with a soul, a year earlier at the age of 16, Buffy Summers still considered herself to be a fairly wholesome, moral young woman. After all, she and Angel were deeply in love and it was only natural that she would give herself to him sexually. They made love and there was nothing dirty or wrong about it. But when Faith unexpectedly arrived in town, it was immediately apparent that she was the exact opposite of Buffy. Both were fierce warriors but Faith seemed to relish the violence and had no qualms about bragging to her new friends that the slaying got her sexually excited. Buffy remembered feeling a bit intimidated when Faith spoke of all she had seen and done, and she had the feeling that Faith also had a wealth of sexual experience. It didn't help that Xander was completely locked in and enamored with the new slayer. Buffy remembered how hard Xander fell for her when she first arrived at Sunnydale high school in their sophomore year. Although she rejected his romantic advances and nothing ever came of it, each time their eyes met, she could tell that Xander would still jump at the chance to be with her. So it hurt Buffy to know that Faith could just roll into town, flaunt her very formidable sexual attributes, and steal Xander's attention completely away from the former object of his desires.

But that was all ancient history now. As Buffy finished the last bite of pizza, and popped the tab on a diet Dr. Pepper, she realized she was no longer that innocent 17 year old high school senior. So much had happened since those days. Her sexual tryst with Parker when she was a freshman in college; Parker, a guy she thought really cared about her but who only used her as what amounted to nothing more than a "fuck buddy." It was the first time she ever felt like a slut. From there she moved on to Riley, the second love of her life. After a passionate and promising start to that relationship, things began to get complicated. A big part of that had to do with Spike. Buffy loathed the evil vampire but was somehow subconsciously attracted to him. He always knew it--she never wanted to admit it. After Riley left her, Spike professed his love and Buffy categorically rejected him. Little sister Dawn came into their lives, a supernatural gift from the monks who were sworn to protect the sacred key from the abomination. Buffy and Dawn's beloved mother died and Buffy blamed herself for not being able to save her. And finally, Buffy herself died, once again saving her sister, and the world.

Since her return from that death experience things had been different for Buffy. She had been in a place of complete and utter contentment and bliss, and she felt like she was ripped out of there against her will, when Willow and the gang brought her back. Nothing on earth could replace the emptiness Buffy felt inside, the longing she had for the place her spirit had been. She was struggling to find something, anything, to fill that void and make her feel alive, whole, and connected again to this earth. She found Spike. She found sex.

The thought crossed Buffy's mind that her relationship with Spike was nothing like what she had with Angel. She loved Angel with all of her heart but she hated everything about Spike. She made sweet love to Angel, a result of their deep and abiding love for each other. But what she and Spike were doing was nothing even close to making love; they were fucking and sucking, a result of their wanton, animal lust for each other. There was a big difference. She hated it, she hated him, but she couldn't stop. God help her, she couldn't stop letting him take her, letting him violate her in every way conceivable, in ways she barely knew existed back in her high school days, and would've been totally embarrassed if she had. The raunchy sex she was having with Spike wasn't even coming close to making up for the hell of being back on this earth, but it was the only thing Buffy could find that made her feel even a little bit alive.

Yes, Buffy hated everything about Spike and what she was letting him do to her and she even hated herself for letting it continue to happen, but she realized she wanted it. She wanted her evil lover to finger fuck her tight little asshole while he made her suck on his cold, stiff cock. She wanted him lick her hot cunt, and she wanted him to fuck her, hard and dirty, until she came over and over again. Buffy even let Spike fuck her virgin ass, an act she would never have even fantasized about when she was younger. She was baffled as to how something so dirty and vile could, at the same time, be so hot and enjoyable. Worst of all (which Buffy was beginning to realize really meant best of all) was where she allowed spike to shoot his huge loads of cum. She let him cum in her mouth, she let him cum in her aching pussy and yes, she even took a load of the vampire's sperm deep inside her freshly violated asshole. That had happened only two nights ago, on the living room floor, while Dawn was upstairs asleep. Buffy was completely naked, her clothes tossed recklessly about the room and Spike had her on her hands and knees with her legs spread apart and her hot ass jutting up and out behind her. As Spike positioned himself behind the horny slayer, Buffy thought he was going to enter her pussy and fuck her doggy style, as he'd done several times before. But Spike had other ideas. His cock was still glistening with saliva from the mouth watering blow job Buffy had just given him and he felt like now was the perfect time. "It's time goldilocks," Spike thought, as he stared at Buffy's pretty, puckered, and oh so tight shit hole. As he positioned himself behind the unwitting slayer and moved in for the kill, he knew that the drying spit on his cock wouldn't be enough to dull her pain, but he didn't care. "Fuck it," he thought, "a little lubrication is better than none at all."

It was Buffy's first ass fucking and the pain was so intense when Spike violently shoved his cock inside her that she was sure her scream would be loud enough to wake up the entire block, not to mention her little sister. Spike had the same fear and quickly, forcefully, yanked Buffy's head back by her long blond hair, reached forward with his other hand and clamped it over her mouth to muffle the scream. Buffy almost bit his hand in retaliation to the searing pain and his violent actions. If she knew that Spike was planning to fuck her in the ass, she most certainly would have resisted. But the sudden onslaught of searing pain left her helpless to fight, even if she wanted to. With each thrust of Spike's hard cock, the agony slowly subsided and was replaced with pure, overwhelming ecstasy. After a few minutes of mercilessly driving his cock in and out of Buffy's now gaping hole, Spike told her he was going to cum in her dirty ass, that she was a dirty girl, and dirty girls like to have men cum in their asses. He didn't ask for her permission, he just did it. When Spike shot his load, it felt to Buffy like someone injected a quart of ice water deep inside her bowels. The second Spike's spent cock popped out of her aching rectum, Buffy immediately felt her anal muscles contracting violently, straining to expel the foreign liquid from inside her. She felt the sperm spewing out of her asshole at first, then oozing slowly and steadily down her thighs. Spike brought her fingers into play and made Buffy finger fuck her own ass while the cum oozed out. He had her so loosened up by that time that Buffy was able, and quite willing, to work four fingers in at the same time. She came harder than she ever had in her life, harder than she ever thought possible. It was, by far, the filthiest thing Buffy had ever done sexually, and as late as this morning when she woke up, the crack of her ass was sticky and the back of her panties damp, with Spike's stale cum that still leaked from her anus while she was relaxed and sleeping.

Suddenly, Buffy felt something cold trickle into her lap. She snapped out of what seemed like a trance to see that her Dr. Pepper had somehow tipped over and was spilling onto her legs and to the floor. She realized that she was now sitting on one of the stools at the counter, her muddy jeans undone and her legs spread apart. In her daze, she had somehow managed to work both of her hands underneath her sweaty blue panties, and her dirt caked fingers were pressed inside her soaking wet cunt, which was ripe and pungent from the exertion of battle. The odor quickly reached Buffy's sensitive nostrils, and in that instant, she came in a torrent of intense pleasure, wildly fingering her pussy and pinching violently at her rock hard clit. During the forceful orgasm, Buffy brought one of her hands to her dirty face and hungrily sucked her fingers into her mouth. She was somewhat surprised at the gritty texture and taste of mud and dirt that accompanied the flavor of her sweet pussy juice. For a fleeting moment, she thought that she probably shouldn't be finger fucking herself with filthy hands, but that rational thought disappeared as quickly as it came-she was far too gone to care. She sucked on her fingers for a while and then slid them back inside her panties. She swore she could also taste a hint of Dr. Pepper, and almost laughed out loud right in the middle of her orgasm, when she realized she had probably spilled some of the soda between her legs and into her pussy. Buffy rode wave after wave of her self-inflicted orgasm until she was spent, moaning as quietly as she could, so as not to awaken Dawn.

When the climax finally subsided, Buffy realized something that hadn't really occurred to her before. She spent most of her time thinking about how much she hated Spike and the filthy things she let him do to her, but at the same time she realized that she loved it...all of it. In fact, the dirtier the better. Laboring for breath, Buffy looked down at her dripping panties, removed her hands from her pussy and brought them to her lips. She sniffed at her fingers for a moment and then sucked them into her mouth with a soft moan. Ever since she was a young girl, much younger than Dawn was now, Buffy loved eating herself, tasting the sweetness of her cunt. It was innocent discovery back then-it was fuel for her sexual fire today. "What more proof do I need," Buffy thought, as she licked her fingers clean of dirt and pussy. "I just fucked myself again, and the prevailing thoughts, hell, the only thoughts I had while doing it, were of fucking and sucking Spike." Buffy's sexual encounter with Parker was the first time she ever felt like a slut. It wouldn't be the last-Spike saw to that. And these days she didn't just feel like a slut, she knew she had allowed him to turn her into one. Buffy suddenly wondered if her encounters with Spike would be enough to continue satisfying her seemingly insatiable desire for filthy sex. She was both dismayed and excited at the thought that somehow, she doubted it.