A Gift from Evan

TITLE: A Gift from Evan

AUTHOR: faith_b

EMAIL: faith_boreanaz@yahoo.co.uk

RATING: NC-17

PAIRINGS: Buffy/Faith-ish (not conventionally)

DISCLAIMER: Let’s just say Joss, Mutant enemy all the btvs people would be due a cut of any profit I make on this fic, if I were making any dough…

Summary: (Set at the beginning of season 4. The mayor thing never happened but Angel still went away). Reeling after a rejection from Buffy, Faith receives a visit from a hobo with promises… (Not one for conventional Buffy/Faith fans) Like all of my fics, this one contains het and slash.

Feedback: Love it or hate it, you still gotta rate it (he-he :)

Author's note: I thought I'd have a little fun with the Buffy/Faith pairing. This is in no way meant to offend anyone or make any sort of political statement etc; just having a little fun...

Dedications: To the feedbackers…


~ Faith POV ~

Part 1: A hobo with promises

Hey. I bet you’re wondering why I’m sitting in here alone drinking this third beer. Well you’d be here too if you’d had the week and a half I have. It’s been some week and a half, lemme tell ya. But you won’t believe me if I do. You’ll think I’ve lost it. Hell, I think I’ve lost it and I know it happened…
What’s that? Fine, ok. I’ll tell you. But don’t say I didn’t give you a heads up.
It all started when I thought I could make a move on Buffy. I had every reason. We’d been doing everything together for weeks; hanging, slaying, dancing… She must have known I was into her with all the looks I’d been throwing her, right? Hell no, you fucking idiot! Wrong. Let me take you back to a week and a half ago... And leave you there…

I walk Buffy back to her house. It’s late and we’re standing on her porch and with the moonlight and all, it’s sorta romantic. She looks up and me and she says goodnight real soft and I take the goodnight as ‘suck my face off’ and move in for the kill. When she realises what I’m about to do, she pulls back and is all, “Faith, I just want to be friends.”
Then she looks at me in a way that only she could. A look that’s all, “nah nah ne nah nah,” and I wanna die. So I just haul ass off of her doorstep and run to my motel room as fast as science'll allow.

So I get there, cursing at myself for being the fucking mayor of idiots-ville when this hobo’s all sat in front of my door. Now, I don’t have time for this, so I’m all “Move.”

Then he looks up at me and he says, “Now, now Faith, that’s very impolite.”

And I’m all, “Impolite? Dude, move the fuck outta my way before I... Back-track, did you just say my name?”

“Sure did,” the guy says, standing up. “Can we go inside and talk?”

Is this guy moronic? “I dunno who you are and right now I don’t care,” I tell him. Do you blame me? I just had my heart ripped out and stomped all over. “Come back tomorrow and I’ll kick your ass then.”

“But by tomorrow, Buffy might have spread the news about what a loser you were tonight."

*Hey, did he just call me a loser?* I think. “Hey, did you just call me a loser?” is what I said, though.

“What would you call someone who tried to score with straight-laced, still-head-over-heels-in-love-with-Angel, Buffy Summers?"

Who the hell is this guy?

“One more word outta you and I’m gonna beat you the fuck up,” I warn. “Now, who the hell are you and why the fuck do you know so much about me?”

“I’m your guardian angel, Faith. Call me Cloud.”

“First off, why would I have a guardian angel? Second off, if you are my guardian angel, where the fuck have you been all my life? And thirdly why do you have a dumbass name like Cloud?”

“Everyone has a guardian angel. Sitting on the sidelines, spectating. And we don’t get to pick our names… God has a funny sense of humour.”

I look at him like he’s on crack… And judging by the look of him, he probably is.
"You're a guardian angel?!" I say. Hey, if you could see him, you'd ask too.

"You don't believe me?"

My look says it all.

"Ok. I bet I can tell you what you're thinking right now."

There's no way he can guess what I'm thinking, so I tell him, "Give it your best shot."

"You're thinking, 'This guy's a major jerk', right? Huh? Right?"

Not even close. "Not even close, man."

"Huh. That usually works," he mutters. Then he looks up at me with a huge grin. "So I'm no mind reader-"

"And you smell a little funky," I sneer. "So listen, you've got two minutes before I'm gonna make you get lost."

"No need to be rude, Faith."

"You’ve got a minute and a half."

"It was two minutes before."

"Yeah, but you're annoying."

"I'll get straight to the point then," he says, to which I have to nod. He continues, "I've been watching you for a while. I saw you crash and burn with Buffy today." He starts laughing... Hard. "Ouch. That must have hurt!" And he keeps laughing.

This guy's really starting to piss me off. "So, what do you want?" I ask him, my fuse totally lit.

When he finally stops, Chuckles tells me, "I'm here to help you, Faith."

"And what could you possibly do for me?"

"What would you say if I told you that I could make Buffy Summers fall in love with you?"

"You could do that?" I look at him with my best 'scary eyes'. "What's the catch?"

"No catch, Faith. When you wake up tomorrow, you will possess all of the qualities that Buffy looks for in a lover... Well, for ten days."

"Huh?" I have to ask. "So she's gonna love me, just like that?"

"I didn't say that," he tells me. "You're going to have to do the work. This is just... A helping hand."

This guy's fuckin' nuts. "Ok, Cloud or whoever the fuck you are," I tell him, grabbing him by his shirt. "Time's up."

The guy's huffin' and puffin' as I throw him out and slam the door, but I don't care 'cause I gotta get me some sleep.

Fuckin' nuts, I tell you.

I get into bed and switch off the light. I so don't believe him, but I gotta say I am a little curious. If what this guy says is true, I might be able to get in with Buffy and I want that more than anything. I know I could get her to want me too and if this gives me a leg up, then I say, "Bring it on!"

TBC...