Fatherly Advice

Title: Fatherly Advice
Author: Pattyanne snapkik@yahoo.com
Disclaimer: None of the BtVS characters belong to me and I make no profits from the story

Feedback: Need it, badly.

Summary: Just a little story about Spike and his daughter, Katie. A "Daddy's Girl" story. Spike and Angel run into each other at the mall

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Spike was of the opinion that indoor playgrounds were the best idea yet for fathers who had to avoid the sun. And whoever had come up with the idea of putting them in a shopping mall should be up for a Nobel Peace Prize.

It was the perfect peaceful solution to one of the stickier problems in his otherwise serene sea of domestic bliss. Buffy could shop, and he could stay with Katie in the play area...and NOT shop.

Everybody was happy.

Katie certainly was. He kept a close eye on his little girl, watching her in the ball enclosure to make sure that none of the bigger kids bothered her. She was in toddler heaven, moving the red, yellow, green, and blue plastic balls from one side of the cage to the other, every so often looking up to make sure that Daddy was still watching out for her.

Daddy was.

Her pink and white stroller was parked next to the bench he was sitting on. The "Little Bo Peep" diaper bag hanging over the handle was stuffed with all the paraphernalia necessary for a day out with a thirteen month old baby.

Diapers, wipes, bottles of apple juice, and various snack foods that 'Mommy' had deemed acceptable for the Princess were laid safely away, along with her favorite blankies and stuffed toys, and a change of clothes.

His afternoon was going splendidly, until....

"Spike." Another stroller, this one decorated with blue and green sailboats, pulled up to the bench. A chubby little boy with rosy cheeks and heart melting brown eyes was deposited in the ball enclosure.

"Angel," Spike replied sourly, feeling the hackles on the back of his neck rise at the sight of Angel's demon spawn sitting within touching distance of his baby girl. "How's Damian?"

"Connor," Angel said firmly, glaring at the blond vampire. "My son's name is Connor."

"Whatever," Spike shrugged. "Why are you in Sunnydale, anyway?" he asked. "Does the Duchess make you come to ALL the malls within a thousand mile radius of L.A.?"

Angel folded his arms across his chest and glowered, which was pretty much his usual _expression. "Cordy is going to be in someone's wedding on Sunday. She needs a dress...and shoes."

"Right," Spike nodded absently, narrowing his eyes as Connor waddled towards Katie. Sure, he LOOKED harmless enough, but still....

"And jewelry," Angel continued, "and a purse. Something for her hair. New make-up. A new outfit for the baby."

Spike smirked. "Things keep going like that, she's gonna put you in the poorhouse before much longer," he observed. "If feeding chunky there isn't already doing it."

"Chunky?" Angel rounded on Spike, highly offended. "Connor isn't chunky!" he insisted. "He's...."

"What?" Spike asked. "Big boned?" He shook his head. "Come on, look at him. He's only a couple of months older than Katherine and he's three times her size."

"That's not exactly a fair comparison," Angel retorted. "She's a girl...and she's puny..."

"What did you say?" Spike demanded angrily, all the amusement gone from his demeanor at this possible slur against his daughter's beauty.

"I mean tiny," Angel said quickly. "You know...like Buffy. Petite."

Spike glared. Technically, Angel hadn't uttered an untrue remark. Katherine WAS built like her mother, delicately. And his sire had backed off of the 'puny' remark tactfully, although Spike suspected that he'd meant it.

An unhappy sound from Katie riveted his attention on the ball enclosure. Connor had sat down next to her and taken the ball she was holding out of her hand, and she was not pleased at all.

"Hey!" Spike said loudly, pointing at the boy. "Make him give that back to her!"

"Oh, calm down," Angel replied, not moving a muscle, "there are plenty of balls for them both to play with."

"Yeah, but she likes the red ones. Red's her favorite." Seeing that Angel wasn't concerned about his son's hoggish behavior, Spike went over to the cage to deal with the problem.

By the time he got there though, Connor had handed Katie one of the green balls, and she'd stopped complaining.

"Guess she likes the green ones, too," Angel pointed out smugly.

Spike frowned at the little boy, who blithely ignored the hostile aura the man was emanating and smiled up at him sunnily, displaying eight tiny baby teeth.

Katie promptly dropped the ball in her hand and held out her arms to her father. He scooped her up and brought her back to the bench, fully prepared to show Angel what a CUTE baby looked like.

She couldn't have been more perfectly put on display, either. Wearing a pair of light pink Oshkosh B'Gosh overalls over a white blouse with short puffed sleeves, she looked dainty and sweet. Her tiny feet were snugly encased in a pair of pink baby Reebok's, and her anklet socks had a pink ruffle sewn around it.

Her silky cap of light brown hair was neatly brushed, and held back by a white lace hair band, decorated with a pink rosebud. With her peaches and cream complexion and bright blue eyes...her father's eyes...she was a beautiful little picture of girlish innocence, and Spike loved her so much that he couldn't begin to contain it.

This little girl and her mother were all the world to him, and always would be.

Sitting on her father's lap, Katherine reached for her juice bottle. Spike extracted it from her diaper bag and sat back with her stretched out in his lap as she sucked on the bottle, her big eyes staring at the stranger sitting beside them.

Connor spotted his playmate getting her drink and yelped at his father, wanting equal treatment.

Angel began to root around in the diaper bag on the back of Connor's stroller. He pulled out diapers, changes of clothing, and toys, but no juice bottles.

Spike watched, amused, as Connor began winding up into a major whine fest. "What are you looking for?" he asked, still feeling put out about Conner taking Katie's ball, "a pork chop?"

"Very funny," Angel muttered. He went and retrieved Connor from the ball cage. "Come here, son," he said soothingly, holding the little boy on his lap and giving him a teething cookie.

The two children sat contentedly, Katie drinking her juice and Connor gnawing his cookie, while their fathers sat in stony silence, completely ignoring each other.

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The babies exchanged smiles and gurgles in a perfectly friendly way. Angel was the first one to crack.

"She really is very pretty," he said, smiling back at the tiny girl when she smiled charmingly at him.

This was Spike's weakest point. He could find something to dislike about nearly everyone, but compliment his princess and he was ready to talk. "Thanks," he said grudgingly, then, "She looks like her mother, don't you think?"

"Yeah," Angel nodded. "She does. But she has your eyes."

Spike grinned, proudly. "We thought they were gonna turn green for a while, but she was too clever for that. Weren't you, darling?" He dropped a kiss on top of her head.

"Is she taking any steps yet?" Angel took the half eaten cookie from Connor's grasping hand, wiping the gooey mess from his tiny fingers.

"She'll do it if we hold her hands," Spike said, shifting Katie on his lap. "But she's not ready to let go yet."

"Mmm," Angel nodded. "Don't be in too big a hurry for it," he said. "As soon as Connor began to cruise around a little, he was always bumping his head on something. We couldn't even take him to the pediatrician for a while. He looked like he was being abused."

"Oh, yeah," Spike said seriously. "I was just reading about one of them the other day in the papers. Got sentenced to jail for beating his little boy. Get this...he said the kid wouldn't stop crying."

"Oh, well, THAT'S a brilliant solution," Angel said, rolling his eyes in disgust. "Go ahead and hit him...that'll make him stop." He shook his head. "Some people should NEVER be parents."

"Got THAT right," Spike agreed. Feeling generous, he said, "He's a handsome enough boy. Give you much trouble?"

Angel bounced the little boy gently on his knee. "Not really. He was a little colicky in the beginning, but once the doctor got him on the right formula, he was fine."

"Yeah?" Spike said. "That's good. We were lucky. Buffy nursed right up until a couple of weeks ago. Never had a tummy ache, knock-on-wood. She HAS had a couple of ear infections, though, now that she's on the juice of the cow."

"Does she drink her bottles lying down?"

"Usually."

"That might be the problem," Angel said, lying Connor down lengthwise on the bench and tugging off his tiny pair of Toughskin jeans. "The milk can gather in the Eustachian tubes and cause the infection."

"No kidding?"

"Nope. Have her sit up a little when she takes a bottle." Unfastening Connor's diaper, Angel reached into the bag for a fresh one.

Spike watched him, looking a little surprised. "What kind of diaper you putting on him?"

"Pampers. Why?"

"Pampers!?" Spike said in disbelief. "What are you, daft or something? Huggies are SO much better than Pampers, you half wit." He pulled one out of Katie's bag. "See, look at this. The legs are gathered for a better fit. Nothing gets past one of these."

"But Pampers has a special stay dry lining," Angel insisted.

"They ALL have a stay dry lining, you stupid git! It's the reason they're on in the first place, so things'll stay dry."

Angel just shrugged and pulled Connor's jeans back on. "I still think Pampers are better."

"Yeah, well you're an idiot," Spike summed up, ending the diaper debate.


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Katie sat upright in her stroller as her father spooned applesauce into her mouth, occasionally scraping some off her chin and shoveling it in.

"I'm kind of surprised that you give her prepared baby food."

Spike frowned as he worked at his task. "What are you talking about?"

"Nothing, really," Angel backpedaled. "It's just that we feed Connor food that we make ourselves."

"Is that a fact?" Spike asked, rolling his eyes.

"It's healthier than jar food. Fresher. No preservatives."

"Yeah? Well, aren't you two just the earth mother and daddy of the year?"

"Spike..."

"Win any prizes?"

Angel ignored Spike's sarcastic tone. "I could ask Cordy to show you how she makes it."

"Thank you, but no," Spike said abruptly. "Katherine is a Gerber baby, if it's all the same to you."

"If you'll check Doctor Spock...."

"Doctor Spock?!" Spike said, incredulously. "He's a thousand fucking years old! Penelope Leach is who you OUGHT to be reading, you numb skull!"

"Hey!" Angel bristled. "You want to watch your language!"

"Oh, pardon me, Mr. Wouldn't-say-shit-if-he-had-a-mouthful."

"You did it again!"

"Fuck you!"

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When the little ones showed signs of an impending nap in their near future, both fathers laid them down in their respective strollers.

Spike located a pacifier from the depths of the diaper bag, popping it into Katie's mouth when she yawned. She sucked vigorously on the pink plastic disc, making the white knob on front bob up and down.

He could almost feel Angel's eyes on him. "What NOW?" he asked, without turning to look at him.

"I didn't say anything!" Angel protested, holding his hands up in a 'It doesn't make a damn bit of difference to me WHAT you do wrong' gesture.

"Yeah, but you're DYING to, aren't you?" Spike sneered.

"No. Well...yes. About the pacifier..."

"Let me guess...you make his yourself?"

"Funny," Angel said. "And, no...Connor doesn't use a pacifier."

"Oh, yeah?" Spike countered. "What's that in his mouth, then?"

Angel looked. "His thumb."

"So it is."

"No, thumbs are different. Better than pacifiers." Angel spoke with all the authority of someone holding an advanced degree in infant psychology.

Spike just glared at him. Angel never changed. Biggest fucking know-it-all in the history of the world. "Better how?"

"A pacifier can make her teeth come in crooked," Angel informed him. "Besides, they're always getting lost and dirty. It's unsanitary."

Sitting back, Spike folded his arms across his chest. "Let me ask you something. When it's time to break them of their sucking preferences, which do you think will be easier to throw away...HER pacifier, or HIS thumb?"

Angel frowned, ignoring the question.

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"So...you planning to stick around SunnyD for a bit?" Spike asked, hoping Angel would say no. He had less than zero interest in the possibility of having to invite him and Miss Pep Squad over for dinner, and Buffy would surely do just that.

To his relief, Angel shook his head. "We're going right home after the wedding. Connor has an appointment with the pediatrician on Monday." A small cloud passed over his face for a moment.

"Shot?" Spike was finally able to feel a pinch of empathy for his grand-sire. This was something he could identify with. The memory of Katie's first inoculation still almost broke his heart.

Placing his beautiful, happy little girl on the examining table...having to just stand there as a total stranger pierced her delicate skin with a needle...hearing her wails of pain.

Logically, he knew she had forgotten the entire incident moments after it had happened, but he still couldn't help feeling as though he had let her down somehow.

The day his daughter had been born, while looking down into her innocent little face, he had silently sworn to always take care of her and protect her. To never allow anyone to hurt her.

When she was two months old, he had been forced to keep still as that promise was broken, no matter that it was a necessary thing and for her own good.

He'd found out later that the shot itself was just the beginning of the fun and games. The baby had been feverish and fretful for the rest of the day and evening, and Spike had blamed the doctor utterly.

After a dose of acetaminophen and a tepid bath, they had put her to bed, then spent the rest of the night going in and out of her bedroom to make sure she was all right.

Then...they'd had to repeat the whole process two months later!

Bloody torture is what it was.

"I hate it when he has to have shots," Angel said. "He looks at me like he's wondering why I'm letting someone hurt him."

Spike just nodded. "I know the feeling."

It was a rare moment of complete understanding in an otherwise prickly encounter between them.

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"So...is he talking yet?"

"No. Why? Is she?"

"Hell, yes. She says mama and dada...and something that sounds like cookie." Spike's tone was highly pleased, satisfied at his child's obvious precocious brilliance.

There was a short silence, which Angel broke first.

"Connor lifted his head up when he was only three weeks old."

"Yippee. Katie rolled over at two and a half months."

"Yeah? Connor sat up on his own three days after he turned six months."

Spike grinned smugly. "Katie did it at five."

"And...he pulled himself to his feet at four months."

"Katie smiled at four weeks."

Their voice were growing louder with each claim.

"Connor was crawling at six months."

"Katie cut her first tooth at seven."

They sat up straight, glaring at each other, almost nose to nose.

"She could wave bye-bye at seven months."

"He could point to things he wanted at six."

"Pointed at the refrigerator a lot, did he?"

"You're calling him chunky again?"

“Like father, like son!"

"What's THAT supposed to mean?"

"Whoa! What are you two fighting about?"

They turned at the same time, surprised to see Buffy standing there with her hands full of shopping
bags.

"He said..."

"This stupid git is trying to...."

"Hold it!" she shouted, nodding towards the babies. Connor and Katie were back in the ball cage, babbling at each other amiably as they played.

Spike and Angel looked at them, then at each other, then turned their backs and stared in opposite directions.

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After Angel departed to go in search of Cordelia, Buffy and Spike sat and watched Katherine play for a few more minutes.

"Connor's getting big, isn't he?" Buffy asked out of the blue. "How old is he now?"

"I dunno," Spike shrugged, not interested in returning to the subject of Angel's son.

"He's a cute little boy," Buffy went on.

"Katherine is much cuter."

She smiled, biting her lip. "Well, sure. Of course she is." Accustomed to her husband's notion that his daughter was the most spectacular darling ever born, Buffy said, " But, those big brown eyes and chubby cheeks are...."

"Chubby is the right word," Spike muttered, standing halfway as Katie crawled across the soft padded floor, heading for a stack of cardboard building blocks painted to look like multi-colored bricks.

"What was that?"

"Oh, um...nothing," he added, sitting back down.

A few moments went by before Buffy spoke again.

"He and Katie really got along well, didn't they?" She laughed a little. "Hey...wouldn't it be funny if someday..."

"No!" Spike cut her off, turning to look at her sternly, knowing what was coming. "It wouldn't be funny at all. Don't even let those words pass your lips, Slayer."

"You don't even know what I was about to say."

"Oh, yes I do. You were about to say wouldn't it fun funny if Katie and Connor ended up married or some such nonsense. Like I'd let him anywhere near my little girl...OUR little girl," he amended quickly.

Wanting the horrible subject dropped, he jumped to his feet and scooped Katie up from the floor, hugging her close. "That'll be the bloody day," he murmured as she snuggled her head down on his shoulder.

Back on the bench, Buffy watched and smiled.

Father and daughter were quite a pair!

The End.

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