Send me an Angel

Title: Send me an Angel
Author: Angel Jade
Rating: NC-17
Content: Violence, language and suggested rape, slash, angst, comedy...
Pairings: A/L
Spoilers: Season two Ats
Feedback: angel-jade@buffyrocks.co.uk
Distribution: Just tell me where, I really don't mind.
Description: Cordy gets a vision which leads Angel to a motel. He finds Lindsey and saves him. But that is only just the beginning of his mission.
Setting: Season two Ats, just before Cordelia gets sucked into a portal and after Lindsey leaves LA.
Disclaimer: Not mine, never were never will be. All characters belong to Joss Whedon and Mutant enemy. I just play with them.



"Aaahhhhhh!" Cordelia cried out, interrupting the conversation Angel and Wes were having. Angel ran over to her, barely catching her in time. He cradled her in his arms while the painful vision tore her mind apart.

As soon as it stopped, Cordelia started babbling information. "Motel, three hour drive from here. Angel you have to go. Room twelve."

"What else? Is it a demon?" Wesley asked.

"Angel has to go alone." Cordelia muttered, holding her head.

"Isn't there anything we can do? We can't just stay here. What kinda demon is it?" Gunn protested.

"No demon. Just go, Angel. Hurry." Cordelia said, almost in tears.

"Cordy, I need to know more than 'the motel' to find it." Angel told her.

Cordelia got up and walked over to the computer. She waited as the computer connected, then typed in the name. A web page came up and she printed out the little map. "Hurry, Angel. He's in pain. And he's really scared. I can feel it."

Angel glanced at the map, before running outside. "Three hour drive...I'll make it there before the sun comes up but I might not be able to get back until tomorrow night. I've got my cell phone."

"Don't forget to turn it on!" Wesley shouted after Angel.

"The guy in trouble...what else did you get?" Gunn asked Cordelia. She didn't look at him.

"Nothing. Just that he needed help." She lied.

"But I don't understand. Why Angel on his own? Surely it would be better if we all helped?" Wesley complained.

"The powers obviously need us for another reason." Cordelia said. "Or maybe we'd just get in the way."

"Well, if we're finished here, I'm gonna head home." Gunn sighed. "Page me if the powers decide we're useful, after all."

"Night!" Wesley said, as Gunn grabbed his things and left. "This is very odd. I'm not sure that letting Angel go alone was a good idea. No demon, you say...hmmm."

Cordelia just stared at the computer screen. A picture of the motel stared back. Room twelve...it looked like a demoralizing place to be. She wondered how he had ended up there.

*****

Angel drove as fast as he could. Cordelia had looked worried, if not a little disturbed by what she had seen. If only she could have explained more. Angel felt a little nervous about turning up unprepared for what he faced.

But he had weapons. And his strength.

He just felt...strange, without his friends to back him up.

*****

Angel clutched the axe in his hand, a couple of weapons stashed in his clothes. He stood outside room twelve, waiting, listening carefully.

Muffled cries could be heard, but that all. Angel took a step back and kicked the door open. What he saw was enough to make his heart start.

"Lindsey?" Angel looked at the once familiar face, crouched on the floor, shirt and pants open, but on. Blood pouring from head wounds, arm wounds...

"Who the fuck are you?" The guy standing over him asked.

Angel just stood there...the powers had sent him here for this? "What are you?" Angel asked the man. "Demon? Vampire?"

"What the fuck's this guy on?" The man asked Lindsey.

Lindsey just looked down at the carpet, not moving.

"Lindsey? You need my help or not?" Angel asked angrily. He'd just driven all this way for this?

"No, leave me alone." Lindsey muttered.

Angel nodded. "Fine." He walked back to his car. There was no way he'd help the ungrateful lawyer. But the powers...

The man standing above Lindsey smirked down at him. "Old boyfriend?" He asked.

"No." Lindsey replied through clenched teeth. He winced as he was dragged up by his shirt and thrown onto the bed.

"Man, he must really like you. Leaving you here, all by yourself..." The man mocked. "I guess I was right, you are a pathetic fuck." The man raised his hand, ready to hit Lindsey again, but something stopped him.

"Can't let you do that." Angel hissed, as he threw the man across the room.

"Angel." Lindsey warned angrily.

"Shut the fuck up, Lindsey." Angel replied, watching the man as he came at Angel again.

It only took one punch to knock him out cold. Angel looked at Lindsey coldly. "Now you gonna explain why I was sent here?"

"Why you lookin' at me, I didn't ask for your help." Lindsey growled, getting off the bed, doing his pants up.

"No, the powers asked me to help you. Why, I have no idea." Angel sighed. He watched Lindsey walk to the closet and saw as his shirt flew behind him. He saw red marks across Lindsey's back and shook his head to himself.

"Yeah well, be sure to say thanks for me next time ya see 'em." Lindsey said, sarcastically.

"Yeah, well. I've taken care of your boyfriend for you, now I can go home. Please feel free not to get into trouble again." Angel replied spitefully, as he went to leave.

"He wasn't my boyfriend," Lindsey protested, "I..."

"I really don't care." Angel interrupted. "Damn it."

"What?"

"I don't believe this." Angel growled.

"What?" Lindsey demanded.

"The suns up." Angel sighed. "I don't know if I can risk going all the way back to LA."

"Great. Have a nice afterlife then." Lindsey smirked, pulling a suitcase from under the bed. Angel watched as Lindsey winced with pain.

As much as he liked to watch Lindsey in pain, he was by Lindsey's side, pulling the case out for him before he could stop himself.

"Thanks." Lindsey muttered, opening the case.

"You're hurt." Angel said.

"Oooh, you become a detective while I was away?" Lindsey mocked.

"Take off your shirt." Angel commanded.

"Fuck you." Lindsey replied.

"Do it." Angel insisted.

"Why? So you can make fun of me. Lindsey gets his ass kicked...that a big joke to you?"

"Only if I did the ass kicking." Angel retorted. Lindsey glared at Angel until finally giving up. He ripped his shirt off and tossed it on the floor.

Angel glanced at the shirt. As Spike liked to tell everyone, he was anal about tidiness. But apparently, so was Lindsey because he picked it up and placed it neatly on the bed before Angel could comment.

"You happy now?" Lindsey asked, angrily, half naked in front of his worst enemy.

Angel ignored him, concentrating on the wounds on Lindsey's back. They were only a day or so old, nothing past that. "What happened?"

"None of your fucking business, now will you please leave me alone?" Lindsey asked stubbornly.

"I'm stuck here." Angel pointed out.

"Yeah, well I'm not and I'd like to get out of here before he wakes up." Lindsey told him, gathering his clothes and throwing them into the suitcase.

"He raped you." Angel stated, smelling the scent on Lindsey.

Lindsey paled but he looked indignantly at Angel. "He didn't rape me. God, where do you get off...?"

"I can smell him on you." Angel said, his face finally gaining a little emotion.

"He didn't..." Lindsey broke off, unsure of how he could possibly explain. "You know, I don't have to explain anything to you."

"The powers sent me here for a reason." Angel said, not sure why he was even bothering with him.

"I don't give a rat's ass what the powers want you to do. I want you to leave me alone." Lindsey threatened.

Angel smirked. "I work for them, not you."

"Fuck you." Lindsey replied.

"So if he didn't rape you..."

"Shut up...just shut the hell up." Lindsey yelled, wishing it had been anyone but Angel. He would have been happier to see Lilah and armed thugs, here to drag his ass back to LA.

"Are you gay Lindsey?" Angel asked, slightly amused at Lindsey's worked up state.

"No! I'm not gay...Angel please...go save the world, torture somebody else...just please, leave me alone." Lindsey begged, throwing the last of his things in the bag. He got himself so worked up, the strain of the last couple of days and the injuries finally took their toll and he collapsed.

Angel was there to catch him before he hit the floor.

*****

Lindsey woke hours later and found he was lying in bed. He looked around, afraid the guy Angel had knocked out was still around. No sign of anyone. Maybe the guy had killed Angel. It's not like there would be a body...

But Lindsey knew in his heart that there was little chance of that. The guy had probably woken and Angel would have sent him on his way. But then where was Angel?

"Angel?" Lindsey called cautiously.

"Here." Angel replied, walking in from the bathroom. He was in a towel and was dripping wet. "Just taking a shower."

Lindsey watched the glistening body with fascination. He found himself wondering how Angel got in such good shape. "I was hoping you'd gone."

"No such luck." Angel replied, smiling. "Your boyfriend woke up and..."

"He's not my boyfriend." Lindsey repeated angrily.

"Hey, take it easy. You don't want to faint again. Oh and it was no trouble putting you to bed. Don't thank me too much." Angel added sarcastically.

"Whatever." Lindsey said, rubbing hid forehead. "You got any aspirin on you?" He asked. "No, I don't suppose you do."

"Any in the bathroom?" Angel asked, trying to be helpful.

"No." Lindsey sighed. "Guess I can live with it."

Angel rolled his eyes. "Where you heading next?"

"Why d'you care?" Lindsey asked, carefully.

"Just making conversation." Angel put his hands up in protest. "Calm down."

"It's none of your..."

"Business. Got it." Angel smirked. "Thought you were heading home."

"Was." Lindsey said, quickly.

"What stopped you?" Angel asked.

"Money."

"Oh." Angel didn't really know what to say next, so he kept quiet. The two just looked at each other for a moment.

"Did your friend get a vision?" Lindsey asked finally.

"Cordelia...yeah, she did." Angel said. "Said someone was in trouble down here. Didn't say it was you though."

"Would you have come if she had?" Lindsey joked.

Angel answered seriously. "Probably not at first. But I would have come eventually." He thought for a second. "I better call and tell them I'm okay." He pulled out his cell phone and dialled the number.

"Cordy, hi." He said, turning away from Lindsey who watched him intently. "Yeah, I'm fine...no, he's fine. You knew? You knew and you didn't say anything...I would have...we're going to have words when I get back...no...no, Cordelia, I'm not...Cordelia...no, no way, no chance...I said no...he won't come with me...I haven't, he just won't...fine." He switched the phone off and put it back in his pocket.

"I'm not going with you." Lindsey said.

Angel nodded thankfully. "I knew you wouldn't."

"Your friend was worried about me?" Lindsey asked, surprised.

"She gets over emotional about the visions, don't take it personally." Angel said.

"Does she usually get visions like this?" Lindsey asked hesitantly.

Angel looked at him and sees the fear in Lindsey's eyes for the first time. He realised it had always been there. When Cordelia said the person he was supposed to save was afraid and in pain...she wasn't joking. Lindsey was holding back. "No, it's usually demons or some big evil..."

"Oh." Lindsey looked away, hiding the hurt in his eyes.

Angel suddenly felt sorry for him. "Lindsey, I was sent here for a reason. You're not telling me everything."

"So?" Lindsey challenged.

And then Angel realised what Lindsey was doing. He was trying so hard to push Angel away; he wanted to deal on his own. But above all, Lindsey wanted help. Preferably without loosing his pride. "Lindsey, you're going to tell me everything if I have to beat it out of you and then we're going to talk about this."

"I thought you were going to leave." Lindsey said, snidely.

"You need my help. I'm here. Don't try and get rid of me because I'm staying."

Lindsey looked as if he was about to cry. "I don't need your help."

"I don't care." Angel replied. "Because I'm here whether you like it or not."

Lindsey thought about it before looking back at Angel. "What do you want to know?"

"Start from the beginning. You left LA..." Angel coaxed.

"So I left LA. Minutes afterwards, I'm stopped by the police. Some joker has put a big sign on the back of my truck." Lindsey glared at Angel.

Angel smothered a grin. "Go on."

"So, I apologise and carry on. I'm going home...extremely happy. Until I stop for a drink. Leave the keys in my truck and guess what?"

"It gets stolen?"

"Good guess." Lindsey said. "So I walk to the nearest motel. I stay for one night, spend everything I have. But then what do I do? No money, no transport, no food..."

"Why didn't you call your family?"

"Maybe because I left my family behind a long time ago." Lindsey replied. "I stay another night at the motel anyway, hoping that I could get away without paying. I get caught. The guy who owns the place, he came here and asked for money. I didn't have it."

Realisation dawns on Angel.

"He beat the crap out of me and told me to pay up." Lindsey said, looking at anything but the sympathetic eyes of Angel. "Then said there was a way I could pay."

Angel nodded, knowing exactly what Lindsey meant.

"He told me I could stay here as long as I needed." Lindsey said, trying very hard not to cry. "As long as I did as he asked me to. And I agreed. I had no choice. He only made me blow him at first and I did. I did it because I needed a place to stay."

Angel frowned and looked at his feet. If he'd have known Lindsey was in this much trouble...wait, he didn't care about Lindsey. Lindsey was the asshole who killed Darla. Made her evil again...

"Last night he wanted more." Lindsey continued. "He wanted to fuck me."

"And you said no."

"I said no." Lindsey repeated. "So he got violent. Used his belt. Do you know what it's like to be beaten by a guy with his belt?"

Angel remembered his father. He had beaten him with a belt. And later...Angelus had taken great pleasure in using one on Spike. "No."

"Yeah, well...you showed up and here we are. No big deal." Lindsey dismissed the subject and looked at his suitcase on the floor. Still full.

"Do you need money?" Angel asked.

"Not from you." Lindsey replied. He was angry and Angel couldn't blame him. Lindsey had just bared his soul and Angel knew what it was like to do that.

"You can't stay here." Angel pointed out.

"So I'll hitchhike." He said. "Are you going to put clothes on anytime soon?"

Angel realised he was still practically naked and grabbed his clothes from the chair. "Hitchhiking is dangerous."

"No shit, Sherlock." Lindsey said sarcastically. "I can take care of myself."

Angel only had to give him a look.

"Fine, maybe I can't even do that, but right now I don't give a shit." Lindsey stuttered.

"Yes you do." Angel argued.

Lindsey glowered at the vampire. "Look, you did your job, now you can fuck off back to LA."

"As soon as the sun sets." Angel replied.

"As soon as the sun sets." Lindsey reiterated.

"But until then..."

"I'm leaving." Lindsey said, grabbing his bag.

"Fine." Angel said.

"Right." Lindsey stood there looking at Angel, almost wishing he would stop him.

"Good luck." Angel said.

"Yeah, well, I'll be fine."

"Good."

"You say thank you to Cordelia for me." Lindsey said.

"Will do."

Lindsey went to leave but stopped at the door. "And...thank you..."

Angel looked at the back of the ex-lawyer, wishing Lindsey would look at him. "No problem."

Lindsey opened the door and walked out.

Angel watched him leave, wondering why he wasn't happy to have solved yet another 'case.'

"Angel!" Lindsey's voice called out desperately.

Angel ran to the door and looked out. Lindsey was standing there, surrounded, and there was nothing Angel could do. They were in direct sunlight.

*****

Men dressed in more black than Angel owned, surrounded Lindsey. They were covered in bulletproof vests and weapons of all kinds. Angel had to wonder why they would go to so much trouble for just one man.

Lindsey looked at Angel and silently cursed him for being so damn weak against the sun. Opposed to him, who was weak period.

"Could use some help over here!" Lindsey called out, knowing full well Angel could do nothing. He watched as the vampire disappeared back into the room. "Hey!" He yelled in protest.

Angel looked round the room for something useful. He looked at the blanket, wondering if he had a chance...but quickly dismissed the idea.

He grabbed the axe he'd brought in and ran to the door. The men had Lindsey on the ground, using the cattle prod-like devices they'd used on him not so long ago.

He aimed at the larger man and threw the axe. It sliced through the air and straight through the guy's neck. The men surrounding Lindsey looked at Angel. One of the men signalled and two of the guards began to run towards Angel. The two men left dragged Lindsey off the floor and towards the van they had arrived in.

The two guards came at Angel as if they had no idea who he was. Two snapped necks later, Angel looked up, ready to watch helplessly as Lindsey was dragged away, but that wasn't what he saw.

"Took your time!" Lindsey's voice said in mock exasperation, walking into the shade with his suitcase as if the two men holding him hadn't even been there.

Frowning, Angel looked over to the van and saw the two bodies lying in an unnatural position.

"How the..."

"Got hold of one of the guns." Lindsey said, looking away.

Angel saw the lie in Lindsey's eyes and became angry. "What's going on?"

"Nothing." Lindsey protested.

"The hell it isn't." Angel hissed, following Lindsey back into the room. "I didn't get send here to save you from your...that guy. Why am I here?"

"Don't keep asking that. I haven't got a fucking clue okay?" Lindsey growled. "I don't need saving Angel."

"Who were they?"

"Wolfram and Hart. Who else?" Lindsey rolled his eyes.

"I thought they were leaving you alone." Angel probed.

"They were." Lindsey said, looking away from Angel. He wondered why this was so hard. Why couldn't he just spit it out?

"And?"

"And now they're not." Lindsey said sarcastically. "Go bug someone who deserves saving." Lindsey paused, realising he hadn't meant to say that.

Angel saw his mistake and wondered why he wasn't smirking. He didn't know how to reply.

"Just go." Lindsey begged.

"Not until I'm finished." Angel said firmly. "Why won't you tell me what's going on?"

"I can't." Lindsey moaned, clutching his head.

"What is it?" Angel asked, concerned with the ex-lawyers strange behaviour.

"A headache. Jeez, you a doctor too?" Lindsey scowled.

"Fuck you, Lindsey!" Angel yelled, scaring Lindsey with his sudden outburst. "I'm here to help you and you keep making jokes. This isn't easy for me either. You killed Darla and I hate you for that. You sold your soul for an office and I hate you for that. But you walked away and dealed with the consequences and I respect you for that, okay? We're not enemies anymore, Lindsey. We're nothing to each other so stop fucking with me and let me help you."

Lindsey remained silent, his back to Angel. He slowly looked around and nodded. Angel saw the tear stains down his cheek and his anger subsided.

"What happened to you?" Angel asked softly.

"I don't know exactly..." Lindsey began. "I was on my way home and..." Lindsey slumped on the bed, staring into the distance as he spoke. "And something attacked me. It was a demon I think...a random attack."

"What did it look like?" Angel asked.

"I don't know. Demony?" Lindsey joked. When he saw Angel's serious gaze, his smile faded and he continued. "Anyway, it attacked me and I killed it, but when I checked it was dead, my hand touched the skin and it was drawn to it...you know? Pulled down and I couldn't move away. Then I got this pain in my hand that moved up to my brain. Next thing I know, I wake up and the demon is nowhere to be seen. I check myself over, not hurt, and I still have the little money I had left. I got in my truck and drove home. Halfway there, I stopped for a drink and a guy picked a fight. I got my ass kicked, but just as I got really pissed off, the guy keeled over and died. I felt weird...as if I'd got pins and needles on my hands. I ran from the bar and carried on driving. A day later, a van full of Wolfram and Hart pull up and try to shove me in the van. Same thing happens. I don't know what the fuck that demon did to me, but I wasn't exactly unhappy about it at first."

"What happened?"

"Met some more of their henchmen along the way. This time, a guy in a suit stops me and offers me the world. He says I have a gift...one that Wolfram and Hart intend on owning whether I agree of not."

"A gift?" Angel looked confused. "But surely anyone could get this just by touching the demon?"

"Extinct." Lindsey smirked. "Guess I just wiped a species out. Oops."

"So you said no?"

"Have you seen what Wolfram and Hart do to their 'gifted' employees? I had no intention of going back and when I tried to kill the guy in the suit, I collapsed."

"You collapsed?"

"Yeah, looks like this gift is not human friendly. I can't control it and I can't handle it." Lindsey sighed. "So I have a choice. Go to Wolfram and Hart and learn to control it or go home and die."

"That's why you didn't go home?"

"I'm fucking lethal, Angel. God knows who I'll kill next." Lindsey lay on the bed.

"Shit." Angel said.

Lindsey began to laugh.

"What?"

"You...shit." Lindsey smiled. "That word...it doesn't seem right from you."

"Yeah well, you've got yourself into quite a situation here." Angel smiled back. "It deserved an exclamation."

"It sure did."

"So what happened, after you collapsed?"

"A guy rescued me." Lindsey said, avoiding eye contact again.

"A guy?"

"Just your everyday average guy. He saw I was in trouble and saved me. Brought me here at my request. I was on my way back to you."

"You were?"

"I knew you wouldn't help me, but it was the only place I could go." Lindsey brushed the hair from his face and looked at Angel, studying his reaction.

"You must have been desperate." Angel joked.

Lindsey smiled. "You have no idea."

"So I guess I'm supposed to sort this out. Get rid of your 'gift' and stop Wolfram and Hart...again." Angel sighed. "Well, better call the gang."

"Don't tell them..." Lindsey cried out suddenly. "You know, about how you found me?" He added softly.

Angel looked at the pleading eyes of the lawyer and nodded. "Of course I won't.

"Hi Wesley." Angel said as Wes answered the phone. "No, I'm fine. I need you to research a demon for me."

"Big, brown, lizard like." Lindsey said.

"Big, brown, lizard like." Angel repeated to Wesley. "When it dies, it passes on a gift of some sort to the person who touches it. The last one alive is apparently dead...yeah...no, not that kind of gift. It kills humans when the gifted experiences extreme emotion like anger...yeah, thanks Wes."

Angel put his phone back in his pocket and looked at Lindsey. "Well?"

"He's looking it up, shouldn't be too long. There aren't many demons who pass anything, let alone something like this."

"I don't know why you're bothering, I'll be dead soon anyway." Lindsey said quietly.

"It's worth trying, isn't it?" Angel asked. He saw the resignation in Lindsey's eyes that told him Lindsey didn't think so.

"Whatever."

"You'll be fine." Angel said, trying to comfort him.

"Sure."

Angel watched the monosyllabic man with a sympathetic gaze. He had no idea how to help him, so him simply sat down next to him and remained silent.

"Angel?" Lindsey's voice quivered.

"Yeah?" He answered.

"You won't leave now, will you?" Lindsey asked, swallowing his pride.

"No, I'm right here." Angel replied, no hint of sarcasm anywhere.

"If I die..."

"You're not going to die." Angel interrupted stubbornly.

"Will you tell my family?" Lindsey asked.

Angel hesitated. "Yeah." He hated to think about the event, but he knew it was only a matter of time. "Yeah, I will.

"My little brother and sister...and my twin brother..."

"You have a twin?" Angel asked, smiling.

"Yeah...identical."

Angel prepared himself to make some sort of comment but an image of the two handsome men side by side stopped him dead in his tracks.

"Angel?" Lindsey called out.

"What?" Angel snapped out of it, realising he had zoned out.

"I got four. My twin brother, and my little brother and sisters. Then there's my dad. Will you tell them?"

"How old?" Angel asked out of interest.

"Twenty, eighteen and twelve." Lindsey replied. "My other brothers died when I was six."

"Flu season." Angel said, remembering a conversation long ago where he'd made fun of a desperate Lindsey who had come for him for help.

"Yeah...flu season."

"You're not going to die. We'll find out how to stop this."

"I haven't spoken to any of them for so long. Last time I saw Rachel she was so little."

"Lindsey..."

"My twin brother, Casey...we haven't spoken since we fought ten years ago."

"Lindsey!" Angel yelled, finally getting his attention. "Tell them yourself. You're going to be fine. Stop going on."

"I just..."

The phone interrupted them. Angel pulled his cell phone out. "Angel" He answered. "...You found it? Extinct, yeah we know...what? Are you sure...?"

Angel put the phone down and looked at Lindsey.

"I'm dead, aren't I?" Lindsey asked, not really wanting to know.

"Worse."

"Worse?"

"You're gonna live."

Lindsey studied Angel's face for sign of a joke. "I am?"

"Unfortunately."

"What did they say?"

"You weren't joking when you said you had a gift. You're a wanted man now." Angel told him.

"What do you mean?"

"You have the power to kill and heal people, given time. No wonder Wolfram and Hart are after you...you could be a weapon of great destruction."

"Oh."

"Or a weapon of great good." Angel added. "I guess that's up to you now."

"I don't want this."

"Tough, you got it." Angel replied.

"I don't know...what to do." Lindsey whispered.

Angel looked at him. He wasn't sure what the powers had in mind, but he was supposed to take care of this bastard. "You're coming back with me."

"What?" Lindsey looked at Angel as if he'd gone mad.

"You heard. As soon as the sun sets, we're going back to LA."

"No...I don't want..."

"You think you have a choice?" Angel asked.

Lindsey wasn't sure whether Angel was joking so he nodded. "Fine, but I'm not staying with you."

"Do as your told and we'll get along fine." Angel smirked.

"Bite me." Lindsey hissed. Angel actually looked as if he was considering the option. "Whoa...I was joking. I'll come with you."

"Good boy."

"Don't patronize me."

"Why?"

"I'm not a child."

"Compared to me you are."

"Fine gramps, I guess I need to take care of you 'cause you're so damn old."

"Are we going to have this all the way home?"

"Angel?"

"What?"

"This is a really bad idea."

"I know."

"I might have to kill you before the day's through."

"I know exactly what you mean."


*****

Lindsey sang loudly on the way home. Angel cringed at the choice in music. And yet, although he hated to admit it, Lindsey really could sing.

They were only a few minutes from the hotel. Angel was trying to think of ways to explain Lindsey's presence to Wesley and Gunn. Cordelia wouldn't mind, she had suggested it after all.

"Angel?" Lindsey asked meekly. "Are your friends going to mind?"

"Probably." Angel replied, keeping his eyes on the road.

Lindsey frowned, wondering why he was letting himself get dragged into this. It was better when he was at the motel. He deserved to be treated like shit. At least he couldn't hurt anyone he cared about there.

Not that he cared about Angel.

Or his annoyingly pathetic gang of losers.

"We're here." Angel said, snapping Lindsey out of his thoughts.

Lindsey looked at the hotel, a worried look on his face. He cursed himself for allowing Wolfram and Hart turn him into such a coward. He was afraid of everything and nothing these days. Gone was the confident lawyer he had once been. But then he'd had Wolfram and Hart behind him. Take away that and what's left?

Lindsey. Nothing more. Just a man.

But that was no longer true. Lindsey was no longer just a man. He was a killer. A weapon of destruction.

"Are you planning on sleeping out here?" Angel asked, yanking the door on Lindsey's side open and dragging Lindsey by his shirt.

"Hey!" Lindsey protested.

"Shut up and get inside." Angel ordered, taking Lindsey's suitcase for him.

Lindsey stood looking up at the hotel. This was it...

"McDonald, if you don't get inside, I'm gonna get testy." Angel warned, walking ahead without even looking back.

"I'm coming, I'm coming." Lindsey sighed, questioning his actions. Since when did he let Angel boss him around?

Since Angel became his last hope.

Lindsey stepped inside and saw Angel trying to explain why the 'evil lawyer' was staying with them for a little while.

"Are you serious?" Gunn asked raising his eyebrows.

"I have to agree with Gunn, this man is a known enemy. Who knows what his ulterior motive is." Wesley said quietly. Lindsey heard everything and smiled.

Ulterior motive.

'Yeah, I'm going to kill you all in your sleep.' Lindsey thought to himself. 'Probably will, now I'm part of the fucking X-Men.'

"Lindsey." Cordelia smiled at him. Lindsey was immediately suspicious.

"Cordelia." He said, remembering her name. "Thanks for the help back there."

Cordelia beamed, happy he knew who she was. But Lindsey saw something else behind the smile. Sympathy.

She had the vision. She saw. She saw everything. She saw enough...

"Thank you for choosing Angel investigations. Please feel free to get into trouble again." She joked. "And you get all this for a small price..."

"Cordelia." Angel intervened, pushing her to the side.

"It's not like he can't afford it." She muttered, half-joking.

"You can take one of the guest rooms. We'll keep looking for more information. Wesley says he's found something useful." Angel offered.

"That's great." Lindsey said, faking a smile. "Guess I'll get some sleep then..."

Angel nodded and left him standing there and all of a sudden, Lindsey felt very alone. He watched the band of superheroes, saving the day, from the sidelines and wished he could be with them. The old Lindsey probably would be. He'd been quite popular in his teen years, despite things being hard. He'd hung around in groups like theirs and they'd eaten pizza and joked around. Now look at him. The moment he joined Wolfram and Hart, he'd lost everything. He'd lost whatever it was that had made him feel alive and he'd been left with nothing but money. And now that was gone too.

He'd been mistaken when he had said he could go home. He could never go home. It wasn't the 'gift' that was the problem, it was him. He was dead inside and no one could bring him back.

Silently, he lifted his bag and dragged it upstairs, both detesting and welcoming the silent loneliness it brought.

Meanwhile, Angel, Cordelia, Wesley and Gunn continued to research. Or rather, Wesley and Angel were trying to research...

"What did you do when you found out it was him?" Cordelia asked, desperate for information.

"What do you think?" Angel replied, sarcastically. "You should have told me."

"You wouldn't have gone." Cordy smiled.

"Is that such a bad thing?" Gunn asked. "Now, I'm cool with saving the innocent...it's what we do...but this guy works for Wolfram and Hart."

"Worked." Angel corrected, jumping to Lindsey's defence.

"Just 'cause he walked away, don't make him a good person." Gunn pointed out.

"If I recall, he did this once before and look what happened then." Wesley said, joining in.

"If he goes back to Wolfram and Hart, I'll..." Angel broke off.

"What? You'll what?" Gunn asked. "The guy could kill us just by thinking about it."

"I'll kill him." Angel said, uncertainly. He didn't know where this sudden urge to protect Lindsey had come from. He silently cursed the powers for doing this to him.

"It won't come to that, I'm sure." Wesley said.

"Come on, the powers want Angel to help Lindsey. I wouldn't have had one of my oh-so-painful visions if they didn't." Cordelia added.

"Just as long as you keep him under control." Gunn warned.

"I plan to." Angel promised. "I wouldn't risk any of your lives and you know it."

No one spoke, but they all thought back to Angel's recent abandonment. Wesley's near death experience. Angel hadn't helped them then.

"Yeah."

"Sure."

"Right."

And not one of them looked certain about it.

*****