A Life to Remember

Part 17

Willow quietly let herself into the dark apartment. Frowning slightly, she set her things by the door. The living room was exactly as she had left it the previous day. Soda cans were piled in one spot on the otherwise neat coffee table and a half eaten bowl of popcorn sat on the end table. Angel was normally so neat, Willow thought to herself, wondering what had made him ignore the small mess. Quietly, she gathered the unneeded items and took them into the kitchen. As she walked in the room her mind started replaying her and Angel’s activities from the day before. Now was not the time to be thinking of this, Willow chided herself.

After disposing of the trash, Willow again made her way to the living room. Thinking it was odd she hadn’t heard from Angel, she decided to check his bedroom. Quietly, incase he was sleeping Willow opened the bedroom door. Spread out over the bed sleeping soundly was Angel. Willow smiled softly to herself and decided to leave him alone. As she was closing the bedroom door she heard his quiet voice.

“Willow?”

“Morning sleepyhead.” Willow said making her way over to sit beside him on the bed.

“Are you ok?”

“Sure.”

“So you’ve thought things over then?”

“Yes, I’m sorry about yesterday I just…”

“No it’s ok, as long as you’ve worked it out.”

“I did.” Willow said, leaning down for a tender kiss.

Angel gently pulled away and looked at her.

“What’s wrong?” Angel asked, resting his back against the headboard, pulling Willow with him.

“Riley found out.”

“Found out?”

“About Buffy, he knows she’s the slayer.” Willow said, sighing softly as she thought of her heartbroken friend.

“Oh.”

“He’s so confused Angel. He doesn’t understand what she does and why she didn’t tell him.” Willow explained, resting her head on his chest.

“It’s a shock at first. But he’ll learn to deal with it soon.”

“I hope so, Buffy is so upset. She can’t loose him now.”

“I doubt Riley will give up on her. He loves her too much.”

“I hope you’re right.” Willow said, looking up at him

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Buffy sighed as the phone rang off the hook yet again. She hoped this time he would have picked up, but it looked like that wasn’t going to happen. Maybe it was too soon; maybe he needed more time to get used to the idea. Buffy sniffled and curled up on the bed once more. Willow had left a little over an hour ago to go see Angel after Buffy had made it clear she needed to be alone. In that time Buffy had called Riley at least eight times. She’d left five messages, begging him to call her so she could explain. She felt like there was a gaping hole in her chest where her heart should be. If only he would call her back, she knew she could explain everything to him and make him understand.

“Buffy…”

“Riley! Oh my god! I was so worried. I thought you would hate me and…”

Riley gently pulled back from the hug she’d pulled him into when he’d entered the room and led them over to the bed. There were soy thy thoughts running through his head, but he knew he had to talk to her. He had his own secrets after all and he needed her to understand. He just didn’t know how he was going to tell her.

“Riley I…”

“Buffy I have to talk to you.” Riley cut in.

“Ok…”

“Buffy, I’ve been thinking it over. I understand why you didn’t tell me. Don’t get me wrong, I would have rather I knew before, but I do understand you were trying to protect me. The fact that you’re a slayer doesn’t bother me as much as the thought that I could lose you. I want to be honest with you Buffy. I have some things I kept you in the dark about too and I think now would be a good time to tell you.”

“Ok.”

Riley took a deep breath and looked into her eyes. He searched them for a minute. Not knowing exactly what he was looking for, but knowing he had to find it. What he saw there surprised him. He saw guilt, apprehension, happiness, love and loyalty. A truckload of emotions passed over him as he gazed into her eyes. He knew she would understand, she was going to stick by him no matter what.

“I’m…I’m involved in an organization Buffy. We hunt demons also. We’re a government agency that patrols the streets and protect the innocent.”

“You’re a commando…”

“A what?

“The solider guys that wear the masks and camouflage, you’re one of them.” Buffy realized.

“Ugh, yea…”

“Oh my god! You’re the guy that let me go that night in the cemetery! You tagged two vamps with those taser things!”

“Um yea that would be me.”

“I-I don’t know what to say.” Buffy said, frowning slightly.

“I’m sorry Buffy. I really never meant to keep it from you.”

“No, it’s ok. I kept the slayer thing from you. I understand.” She promised, looking up at him.

“There’s something else I have to tell you Buffy.” Riley explained, looking away.

“O-Ok”

“Buffy, I was sent to follow you, after that night in the cemetery. My commander thought it was suspicious that a girl was in the cemetery at midnight alone. She sent me to gather information on you and see if you posed a threat or not. I never once thought you were the slayer. I insisted that you were a normal girl, that there wasn’t anything to find out about you. I thought the assignment was over. But Professor Walsh had you followed by another operative and they caught you on tape staking a vampire.”

“So you were just following me? I was just an assignment? Was dating me part of the plan and was that just a sick joke on your part? Did pretending to love me get you bonus points with your boss or what?!” Buffy accused, snatching her hand away as if she were burnt.

“Buffy no. I swear what I feel for you is real. That wasn’t part of the plan. I didn’t mean for you to get in the middle of this. I love you Buffy, with all my heart. Please believe that.” Riley begged.

“I want to Riley…” Buffy said, trying to stop the tears from falling down her face.

“Then do it. I’ve never felt the way I feel about you. We both kept secrets and we both did it to keep each other safe, but we’re out in the open now Buffy and nothing can come between us if we don’t let it.”

Buffy looked at him for a long minute. She knew in her heart he loved her, he was too nice to play with her in that way. She trusted him with everything she was and while learning this bit of information changed things, it didn’t make her love him any less.

“I do believe it Riley. I love you with all of my heart and I trust you with my life, so from now on we’re completely honest with each other and hide nothing.”

Riley smiled and kissed her passionately. He’d been prepared to grovel and beg on his hands and knees for her forgiveness. He knew she was the one for him and knew that he couldn’t lose her over this. The Initiative wasn’t worth nearly as much as she was to him. He would die for her and knew if she asked him to leave the Initiative he would, without ever looking back.

Buffy poured everything she had into their kiss. She wanted to make sure he knew she forgave him and loved him no matter what. That she wasn’t ready to give him up and would fight to the death for him.

She felt him lean her back on the bed and gently cover her body with his own. She knew what this meant, knew they were about to make love and put the past behind them. She wanted this and felt like this was the purest most wonderful thing to ever happen to her. She moaned softly as his large hand covered her small breast and his mouth kissed her neck. Buffy couldn’t help it when her hands found their way under his shirt to roam over his muscular back, rubbing and scratching her way around. Finally she abandoned the smooth white expanse of flesh and moved to tug his shirt up. After it was finally removed, Buffy made short work of her own top and bra, leaving them both topless, free to feel flesh upon flesh.

Riley slowly bent to take a pink nipple into his mouth. He circled it with his tongue a few times, delighted at each of Buffy’s breathless little moans. He made sure to show the same amount of attention to its twin before slowly making his way down her body. When he reached the top of her pants he lightly traced his fingers over stomach, tracing the edge of her jeans. Buffy arched up into his caress and moaned softly, telling him to continue. Riley smiled and unzipped her pants before moving to pull them down and off her shapely legs. After he disposed of both of their pants and underwear, Riley settled himself between Buffy’s legs. Lightly he traced his fingers over her hip and down to her curls and following the path that led to her opening.

They made love soon after that in a tangle of sweaty limbs. Neither of them had ever experienced such deep feelings for another person as they did then. Buffy with her limited experience had no hint as to the pleasures she felt with Riley. He took her to places she only dreamed of and hoped she did the same for him.

Riley wasn’t as experienced in love making as most men his age, but he knew one thing was for sure. Buffy was the most passionate lover he’d ever had. His love for her only multiplied ten times after this encounter and he realized he could never let her go. Not just because she was good in bed, but because she obviously loved him as much as he loved her. She proved that without a doubt.

They lay together for a few moments, catching their breath and kissing tenderly before Riley had to get cleaned up. He returned to bed to find Buffy slipping under the covers. Quickly, he joined her and pulled her into his arms.

“I love you so much Buffy.”

“I love you too Riley.”

Riley placed a small kiss on her head and pulled her tighter against him. He knew everything would work out, he just hoped nothing else popped up to get in their way.

PART 18

Angel looked down at the redhead who was snuggled closely against his body and sighed softly. She still hadn’t said anything about what was bothering her and why she had run out the way she did. He didn’t want to push the issue, but he was worried. He wanted to know what was going on so he could fix it.

“Angel?” Willow said, without turning her head to look at him.

“Yes?” Angel said, stroking her hair lightly.

“I’m sorry…about yesterday.”

“It’s ok Willow.”

“Can I tell you what was bothering me now?”

“Of course.”

Willow sighed deeply and pulled herself out of his arms so that she was sitting across from him. Tucking one leg under her, she let the other hang off the bed as she prepared herself for the explanation. She closed her eyes for a moment and took a deep breath before looking down at her nervous hands.

“I-I love you Angel and I know you love me. That has nothing to do with why I ran out yesterday. I was more confused about what was happening then anything else. We’ve been getting closer and closer to…you know.” Willow blushed, “and the whole problem was I wanted us to. I haven’t been able to stop thinking about it and there is nothing more I want then to…be with you…like that. But I’m also scared.”

“Wil…” Angel started before he was cut off.

“Wait please…I-I know you would never hurt me. That’s not what I’m scared of Angel.” Willow said, meeting his eyes for a moment before they darted back down to her hands. “I’m scared of…of not being good enough I guess. I don’t have any experience with making love and I know that you do. I don’t know how I can compare to your other…girlfriends.”

Angel stared at her bent head in shock. Could she be serious? She was worried about not being able to please him in bed? He had no doubt in his mind that she would take him to new heights and pleasure him beyond belief.

“Hey” Angel said, tipping her head up to look at him. “I’m not worried about that Willow. I love you and you couldn’t do anything wrong with me. You please me everyday that you’re here with me and give me your love. I may be experienced Willow, but I have no doubt that you’ll show me a thing or two. You never have to compare yourself to my past. They mean nothing to me and the only woman I ever think about is you.”

Willow smiled slightly.” I just want everything to be perfect and…”

“It will be perfect. We only need to love each other and everything will be fine. I promise.” Angel said, kissing her softly.

Willow closed her eyes and smiled. She gave in to her desires and kissed him for all she was worth. He was right, they only needed to love each other and everything would work out.

Willow stroked her hands through his thick mass of hair and their mouths made love together. She loved kissing him. It was so easy to lose herself in him while they were kissing. He was so talented with his mouth.

Angel broke the kiss to allow his love to breathe and made his way down her neck. He licked and nipped his way down to where her neck and shoulder met before sucking the bit of flesh into his mouth. He knew it drove her crazy when he did this and decided that was just was he was striving for. The moans and gasps of his name drove him wild and he laid her back on the bed for a better position.

Willow arched her neck and moaned softly. She felt Angel settle some of his weight on her and sighed happily as she let her hands roam his back and under his shirt as he continued to greedily lave her throat. Her fingernails scratched a happy trail down his back as he hit a sensitive spot.

“Mmm…” Willow moaned appreciatively.

Angel smiled and raised himself up, removing her shirt and baring her to his hungry gaze. She wore a modest white bra, which molded itself around her small but perfect breasts and drove him crazy. He couldn’t wait to see what was hidden underneath. Angel slowly brought his right hand up, bracing most of his weight with his left and covered her right breast. He smiled at the small gasp she let out as she pressed herself into his palm.

“Angel more…” Willow moaned.

Angel grinned slightly and looked at her flushed face, “More of what?”

“Just…more please?” Willow begged, blushing profusely under his intense gaze.

He smiled at the shy girl lying beneath him and lifted both of them so they were sitting face to face. Gently he reached behind her and unhooked her bra. Slowly, so as not to startle her, he pulled the straps down her arms and removed the garment.

Willow kept her eyes focused on Angel’s. She tensed as he removed her bra and brought her arms up to cover her naked breasts.

“Shh, it’s ok.”

Willow nodded and let her arms drop to her side again. She watched as Angel stared at her and felt her breathing speed up under his scrutiny.

Angel groaned as her breasts rose and fell, in time with her labored breathing. Quickly, he leaned in and captured her mouth with his own, pulling her up so she was pressed tightly against his chest and comfortably settled on his lap. Angel was so focused on loving her with his mouth that he never noticed her trying to remove his shirt until it was caught between them. He broke the kiss and roughly pulled the offending piece of cloth over his head. He’d no sooner thrown the shirt behind him before Willow was kissing him again. Wrapping his arms around her small form, he returned the kiss whole-heartedly.

Willow moaned into his mouth and tried to push herself closer, which only resulted in a strangled cry from both of them as she ground herself against his hard length.

“Willow, you feel so…”

“Angel…please…” Willow moaned, rocking her hips against his.

Not able to control himself anymore, Angel pulled her away and laid her back on the bed. Quickly he removed the rest of their clothes and kissed his way up her body. Starting at her feet, he kissed and licked his way up her legs before stopping at the juncture between her thighs.


He moved his hands up and down the inside of her thighs, hoping to relieve the tension he felt there. Her scent was driving him crazy, being this close and smelling her womanly aroma was making him lose control. He had to taste her.
But first he wanted to ready her. His left hand traveled down to tangle in her curls and he slowly teased her.

Willow moaned at the first touch of his hand down…there. She blushed as she realized what was happening.
She was being made love to, tenderly, by the man she loved. She bucked her hips slightly as she felt a cool finger tease her entrance before it was slowly pushed in. Her stomach clenched and she tried to clamp her legs together as it made its way deeper.

“I won’t hurt you Willow.”

“I-I know…it’s just…”

“Relax. I promise you’ll enjoy it.”

Willow nodded and lay back down, determined to relax and let herself be loved. She couldn’t believe the wonderful feelings she was having. Her body was slowly tightening up and she felt herself getting ready to spiral out of control. This was unbelievable; she’d never experienced such pleasure before. Willow tried to keep her eyes open but couldn’t. As soon as they were shut she saw bright white flashes. She moaned loudly, thinking it had to do with the powerful feelings she was having. But the flashes didn’t stop and suddenly she remembered all of her dreams. It was frightening how the flashes told a story she didn’t understand. And now instead of pleasure she felt pain. She tried to call out to Angel, tell him something was wrong, but couldn’t. She was so confused. What was going on? This wasn’t supposed to happen. She and Angel were making love; he was pleasuring her and making her feel like the most treasured being in the world. But now she was in pain, nothing excruciating, just a dull throbbing in her head and sore muscles. But so much worse then what she was feeling five minutes ago. Finally she found the strength to open her eyes.

Blinking a few times to clear her vision Willow looked around. She wasn’t in Angel’s room anymore. She was in…the hospital? Willow’s mind swam with all kinds of horrific thoughts. Had Angel lost control? Was that the pain she felt? Had he brought her here to save her life after what happened? And what did happen? Where was he? Shouldn’t he be here, keeping her company?

“A-Angel?” Willow croaked out, frowning as her throat refused to cooperate.

“Here, this will help your throat.” A woman said, slipping a few ice chips past her lips.

Willow swallowed gratefully as her dry throat was coated with the cool melted liquid. She cleared her throat a few times and turned her head to look at the woman standing beside her.

“Where’s Angel?”

“The young man that brought you in here?” The nurse questioned, as she checked Willow over.

“I think s-so.”

“Hmm well the last time I saw him was last night. He usually comes in around 8 o’clock or so. It’s only 6:30 now.”

“Call him please?”

“Sure honey. Just let me check the files.”

Willow nodded and settled back to wait. How long had she been out for Angel to have an established a visiting schedule?


PART 19

Angel sighed softly as he buttoned his shirt. He had a few errands to run before going to the hospital for the night. He briefly wondered if Buffy and Riley would be there. He really wasn’t in the mood for them tonight. He sat on the bed, ready to put his shoes on when the phone rang. Quickly, Angel made his way to the kitchen and picked it up.

“Hello?”

“Hello, I’m looking for a Mr. Angel…”

“Yes, that’s me.” Angel said, frowning slightly.

“I see, well this is Sunnydale General and we have you listed as a contact for a Miss Willow Rosenberg.”

“Yes, Is she ok? Did something happen?”

“She’s fine Sir. She woke up this evening and has asked for you. She refuses to see anyone but you.”

“Ok, I’ll be right over.”

“Thank you, we’ll see you soon.”

Angel hung the phone up and sat down, staring blankly at the wall. She was awake. She was awake and was asking for him. Did she remember what happened? Did she blame him for everything? He knew it was his fault. He didn’t deserve her forgiveness. He should have been in more control, should have thought things through more.

Shaking his head, Angel stood and made his way into his bedroom. He quickly finished getting ready and dashed out the door. He would make it up to her. Somehow he would earn her trust back and make everything right again.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Willow sighed again. This is really becoming a bad habit, Willow thought. The nurse had informed her that she was not allowed to leave the bed under any circumstances. That was over an hour ago. Willow felt like she’d been in that bed for months and just wanted to get up and stretch her legs. But no, the evil nurse wouldn’t let her. Every time she scooted just a little bit, Nurse Meanie would glare at her and tsk. She actually tsked at her! How rude…

Willow looked up as the door opened and another nurse came in. Probably hear to take Meanie number one’s place, Willow thought grumpily.

“Miss Rosenberg?”

“Yes?” Willow asked tiredly, she was so sick of being asked questions and told what to do. She just wanted to go home.

“You have visitors.”

“Who?”

“Two young men and a girl. I didn’t catch their names.”

“Oh, just send them in I guess.”

The nurse smiled gently at her anld tld the door open. Nothing could have prepared Willow for the blonde whirlwind that flew into the room and wrapped itself around her.

“Buffy geez, I’m ok, nothing big really.”

“Nothing big? Willow…”

“Willow! God I’m so happy to see you. Man, I didn’t know what I was gonna do with out you.”

“Oh Xander, you act like I was dead or something. I’m fine, really. Besides I don’t want you guys to say anything like that in front of Angel.”

“What? Why? It’s his fault!” Xander yelled.

“No it isn’t. Now shut up. I don’t know…” Willow yelled back before she was cut off.

“Willow…”

“Angel!” Willow said happily. “I was so worried when I didn’t see you when I woke up and I wasn’t sure what was going on. I don’t remember leaving the apartment and…”

“I’m so sorry Willow.”

“Angel, no. It’s ok.” Willow said jumping out of bed. She pointedly ignored the outraged nurse and threw herself into Angel’s arms. “It doesn’t matter Angel, I’m ok now. You have nothing to worry about.”

With that she leaned up and kissed him gently on the mouth.

Three things happened next, none of which Willow expected. Xander and Buffy gasped, Buffy sat heavily on the bed and Angel pulled away.

“What…”

“Angel?”

“Willow I don’t know what came over you but…”

“Came over me? I was just making sure you wouldn’t blame yourself.” Willow said confused.

“But wh…”

“What dead boy is trying to say is…why the hell would you want to kiss him?” Xander said, coming out of his shock.

“Because that’s what girlfriends are supposed to do Xander, and don’t call him that.”

“G-Girlfriend?” Buffy stuttered.

“Yea, why are you guys acting like you don’t know this already? And why are you acting like you’ve never kissed me before Angel?” Willow asked, with tears in her eyes.

“Because we didn’t know you were going out, Angel never said anything after the accident.”

“Accident? What are you talking about?”

“The demon, the one who attacked you that night on your way back from the library…”

“But that was almost four months ago.” Willow said, her mind trying to understand what was going on.

The three others in the room each looked at each other and then back to the confused girl leaning weakly against the bed.

“Willow it was only a month ago. You’ve been in and out of a coma since that night” Buffy explained gently, trying to lead her to the bed.

“What?!” Willow hissed, yanking her arm away from her best friend. “How is that possible? I’ve been awake since the day after that happened. I only had a bump on the head. I-I was ok…A-Angel tell them. You took me back to your apartment and I was fine. Tell them!”

“Willow I…”

“No, I don’t believe you! We’re in love, we’ve been together for four months, Angel don’t you remember? Buffy we made up after that night. We’re best friends again. We’re getting ready for college in a few weeks. Xan? You and Angel have started to talk more; we’re all friends now. We do everything together. Don’t you remember? Please…remember.” Willow cried, as she slid down to the floor.

Buffy rushed to her friends side and hugged her tightly. “It’ll be ok Willow, I promise.” Buffy said, stroking her weeping friends hair. “It’ll be ok.”

END