Toys 'R' Us

Title: Toys ''R' Us: Chapter Nine.


Rating: NC-17


Summary: Whatever shall Buffy and Faith do after being trapped inside a local Toys 'R' Us by a pair of mischievous wizards under Willow's watch?


Disclaimer: I do not own anything here, save for the storyline. All characters and the like are trademark properties of Joss Whedon, Fox, Mutant Enemy and it's affiliates. Barbie and Skipper are copyrighted to Matel. Toys 'R' Us is copyrighted to their fucking bizarre giraffe and whoever else. Please don't sue. Anything else mentioned, be them persons or objects, are copyrighted to their owners just the same and blah, blah, blah. No money is made from this, so don't sue. I'm just a poor girl. Really, I am.


A/N: I know that the last chapter was so far back, but I've been insanely busy with work and all that unfun junk. Now, I am back full blast and ready to update all my fictions. Hope you enjoy this chapter and thank you once again to the reviews I've had on previous chapters. Reading them made me really have the urge to get back into writing. ^o^



- - -

One girl stared in horror.

The other was trying not to burst into peels of laughter.

The sun that had loomed overhead was now slapped onto the small hill in front of them. Blood seeping from it's eyes and mouth. Puppy dogs on leashes had no heads. Dolls holding the leashes were just bodies. Fluffy teddy bears had their stomachs exploded from the inside out. Sheep and bunnies had missing heads or stomachs much the same to the bears.

"Straw--what?" Buffy finally asked. Her mouth felt dry. Her eyes felt as if they were burning. Was this some bad, BAD dream? If so, it was obvious that Faith was in it. Bad dreams and Faith seemed to mesh well. Not to mention dirty dreams. Oh, but, no! Bad Buffy. Don't think of those, she scolded herself mentally.

"Strawberry syrup." Chimed Faith, who yanked from Buffy with force. Why the hell was the tiny blonde so damn clingy all of a sudden? Wriggling her finger that scooped up more of the blood, Faith offered it over to Buffy, who looked repulsed.

"Oh god, morbid much, Faith?" She spat, and turned her head away to actually give a dry upheave. The mere thought of mentally challenged here tasting the splattered blood was beyond disturbing.

"Da fuck, B? It's syrup. It's not real blood. Besides, this can't be real. Has't'be some illusion spell." The brunette concluded. Likely they were still stuck in Toys 'R' Us and the weasel brats went for gold and casted a demented spell over the oldest Slayers.

Lightly and slowly, as if it might move, Buffy kicked at a nearby severed limb of one of the former cute animals. "I just wanna go home." She sighed, stepping over the limb to get a better look at where they were.

"Looks like Alice in Wonderland meets the Hellmouth on some serious acid trip, huh?" If Buffy wasn't going to make light of their sitch, then by all means, Faith sure as fuck was going to! Following the blonde since there wasn't much room to walk without stepping on, not over, body parts and even Faith wasn't that creepy, the doe eyed beauty did although do something to wig the older girl out. And that was brush a fur covered body part over the back of Buffy's neck.

Without looking behind her, Buffy snapped, "Faith! Quit it, will you? This is serious." After a minute or two of keeping her hands to herself, Faith went about teasing the loose strands of gold in front of of by whooshing them from side to side. Good thing little Miss Muffet couldn't see the syrup staining the tips of those strands or Faith assumed she'd meet the same fate as the pawed limb she held. "STOP!" Louder this time, Buffy growled and whirled to face Faith who was caught red handed, literally, with the limb. "OHMYGAWD!" Dread washed over the blonde's features as all colored paled from her face.

Innocently, or attempting innocence, Faith swung back and forth on the heels of her feet, limb tossed far, far behind her. Making a sickenly sounding crash on something else. "Hmm?" She actually giggled. Faith couldn't help but giggle girlishly. The look on Buffy's face was priceless.

Up and down Buffy jumped around. Swatting hands behind her neck as if remains of the grubby limb lingered on her skin. When hands and fingers brushed the ends of her hair, there the sticky gooey substance Faith proclaimed as strawberry sryup lay. "AHHHHHH!" Shrieking at the top of her lungs, Buffy was comforted by Faith who earnestly tried to wipe the blood from the locks. Only her hands were covered in the goo, and added to the amount already on. "Not helping. You are not helping, Faith!" Panic was something the wigged out blonde was not used to. So when it came now in tidal wave after tidal wave to her sanity, all Buffy could do was lash out in hand slapping to the brunette.

"I'm TRYING to help, but ya keep moving around worse than Drew on soda and pixie stix, damnit, stand still B, before I rip ya hair out unintentionally." Was the warning that did ease the heavily panting blonde some. "Thank you. Now lemme ring the syrup, cos B, that's all it is honest to god, out."

After about twenty minutes, Buffy's hair was dry but dyed half way pink. The strands clinging together from the stickiness the gunk caused.

"All done. Ya okay?" The malicious intent Faith once had towards Buffy vanished as she peeled dead hair from her hands that were more than smeared in the sticky crap. With a nod Buffy remained silent. "Good. I say we try and find the rabbit hole and get the fuck outta this place before either of us finds ourselves spitroasted."

Good old, innocent, naive Buffy, who did more things she had no name to with Spike, asked, "What's spitroasted?" If only she hadn't asked, because Faith told her on the walk towards...well, towards where ever the hell they were headed.

"Oh." Quietly she replied, almost as if she didn't wanna know anything further. Oh, but she did! "So how do YOU know what that is?" If Faith had the chance to be mean earlier, now it was Buffy's turn. Only she never got the luxury of watching Faith squirm. It took more than that to get Faith ruffled.

"Saw it on a porno, B. Why, picturing me in tha' position?" Wriggled brows teased the other as she nudged her with the left sideof her shoulder. Buffy nearly tumbled caught off gaurd from the question directed her way.

"Ew, no. Was just wondering if you happened to you know, do it that way." Was the truth... partially. Plus she suddenly found herself jealous with even just images of Faith pinned by two guys that way.

"Me? C'mon, Twinkie. I'm not submissive in bed. Uh uh. S'the other way around. I get my lovers in that position." You would have to be blind to not notice the bright tinge to Buffy's cheeks. Canting her head backwards to eye Buffy's ass, Faith wondered if other cheeks turned just as red, but by slaps.

Noticing where eyes had drifted to, Buffy glared at the other Slayer, "You were just checking out my ass. God, maybe you should have used that limb for something else than annoying me!" The suggestive tone she took on indicated just what she meant by use.

Finding herself unable to resist, Faith struck out a hand to grasp Buffy's and boldly shoved it between her legs. "Cos I got a pair of perfectly workin' ones right here." Back and forth she rubbed the hand between her thighs. The light tickle and bruish over tight denim was doing nothing but building the knot in Faith's stomach more. Add that with the way Buffy froze, unable to move her hand away and well, Faith was enjoying herself more than she thought.

-TBC (Sex in the playground to come? Hmm, we shall see. :P)