This Kind of Lonely

Disclaimer

I own NOTHING (except for the plot*smile*)! Anything in this story that falls under existing copyrights belongs to their respective owners.

A/N
I am so sorry for the long delay. I think my real life is really trying to kill me right now and I so am happy to finally being able to present the new chapter now. I would try to promise you the next one faster as this one but due to my semester finals starting in two weeks I won't be able to write as fast as usual.
At everyone that again left me a few lines on how I did: You are the best! Awesome!! Enjoy the new chapter, tell me what you think. ;)
Hugs to all!

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Previously on "This Kind of Lonely":

Riley advances further onto Buffy and she can't stop him. Minutes later Cordelia arrives and threatens him by calling the police. He leaves and Buffy tells Cordelia about the whole incident. Spike returns later that evening with a little help from Xander. Spike passes out after Harmony returns to the house due to his intoxicated state.

This Kind of Lonely


Chapter 9: One blonde too much

Sometime in the late morning hours Spike was dreaming in his bed in the master bedroom of his house. It was quite a fancy dream with a certain blonde girl in it. He dreamt of Buffy lying next to him on the bed. He smiled in his sleep at the thought. He felt Buffy raining kisses over his still slightly intoxicated body. He felt her nipping at his earlobes at his neck near the jugular and this time he gave a small growl, still asleep. In his dream the little blonde kept on using her luscious lips on his face while her small but powerful hands started to explore his body and to conquer unknown country.

Spike slowly started to wake up and definitely felt somebody kissing his face. Although he still wasn't quite up and wide awake again, he started to mutter something under his breath that couldn't be deciphered by anybody. It took him about three or four tries until his voice was clearly audible in the room.

"Mmh…Buffy…feels so good…" his voice was low and had a sultry tone.

"What?" Harmony's voice rang through the bedroom in a sharp tone "are you insane…I am not that bimbo…I am your fiancée not some dumb blonde to stupid to watch the street."

Spike groaned and tried to hide under his pillow in a desperate attempt to shut out his screaming fiancée. "Ex-fiancée" he thought "if she doesn't stop her bloody screaming."

But Harmony, never someone to recognize subtle hints, kept on ranting much to Spike's discomfort.

"What's it with you and the bitch anyway?" At that a small growl could be heard from somewhere under the pillow.

"She's only taking advantage of your pity for her and your money only to sue you afterwards anyway when she's able to use her stilts again" she just wouldn't let it go.

"Harm…" Spike tried to focus her attention on himself again.

"You are even more stupid than you are now if you believe she would show gratitude for what you did…" Harmony didn't catch on Spike's call.

"Harmony…" he tried once again his voice a bit louder this time.

"…oh no I know her type, she just sucks you dry, until there's nothing more to be taken and then, when you're already lying on the ground…"

"Harmony" he yelled, instantly grasping his throbbing head in his hands. "Nice idea, mate, yelling your lungs out of your body with the mother of all headaches kickin' you're brain from one side of your skull to the other" Spike thought while he tried to suppress the agonizing pain spreading through his head.

"What?" she finally recognized Spike trying to speak to her.

"Please…just…just leave me alone, we'll talk later, I don't think I am in any condition to discuss such matters with you right now" his voice held a pleading tone. He thought he might die if she would speak one more word. Her voice had exactly the right tune to split his head into two parts. Like a really sharp axe or something alike driving through skin and bone severing parts that originally belong together and never should be split.

"Oh yeah, so what, little blondie bear doesn't feel well so he doesn't have to deal with his bullshit…oh no mister…I won't let you off the hook so easy…you will tell me what's up and why you avoid me all the time…" Harmony hadn't finished her rant yet and her voice hadn't lost its sharp tone or amplitude either.

"If you ask me I think you only want to get between her legs, only because she tries to look as good as I do although she could never be a competition to me. I think you like her just because of that, and because she plays the helpless little damsel in distress…" Harmony just wouldn't let it go.

"Shut your bleeding gob" Spike suddenly roared, his voice echoing from the wooden panels on the walls of the bedroom "leave me the fuck alone, we'll talk when my head isn't split anymore…"

After he mentioned his own head Spike felt the pain again. Again he had yelled, again he had his head grasped between his hands and again he felt like dying. He couldn't stop himself from cursing the day he had met Harmony Kendall. He suddenly hated her for everything she was. He hated her looks, her voice, her form, just everything. In that little moment of pure agony he made a decision. They were over, in fact they never had been. He just couldn't take her anymore and wouldn't torture himself any longer. He didn't need her and her stupidity and he sure as hell didn't need to deal with it. She could go to hell as far as he was concerned at this particular moment and he vowed to tell her so as soon as he would be able to talk again without trying to kill himself.

Just as Harmony took a deep breath to respond the door to the bedroom flew open and Xander stood in the doorframe. His hair was tousled and he looked like he had a rough night and definitely not enough sleep yet. He saw Spike lying on the bed holding his head and Harmony kneeling next to him on the mattress about to strike again with her words. He took a few long strides into the room until he stood right next to the bed and the unnerving blonde girl. He grabbed her by her arm and pulled her from the bed right towards the open bedroom door.

"There's definitely one blonde too much in this room" Xander muttered under his breath while he shoved Harmony out the door. Although she struggled and tried to fend off the brunette man she couldn't stop herself being thrown out of her fiancée's bedroom.

"Thanks, mate" Spike spoke in a low voice after his friend had demonstrated the exact meaning of "being de-invited" to Spike's soon to be ex-fiancée.

"You're welcome" Xander replied and started to leave Spike's bedroom as well.

"You look like you haven't slept enough" Spike continued "and by the way, why are you still here?"

"I am going to get some more sleep" Xander totally ignored Spike's question "we'll talk when you're up to it again" he grinned at the blonde Brit "you should try to sleep some more yourself…" where his parting word before he went into the hallway and closed the door behind himself.

Spike closed his eyes and tried to ignore the pain still seeping through his skull. He suddenly wondered why he had drunk himself nearly to death in the first place until he recalled the events from yesterday's early evening and had to growl low in his throat. Why did she have to kiss that little bugger? Everything had gone so well, she finally had opened up a bit and he had started to more than like her and she has to go and muck everything up before it even started.

Those thoughts made his head spin once again with a vengeance and he decided to think about the incident and its consequences when he wasn't "undead" anymore. So he turned around and once again buried his head in his pillow. Sleep overcame him fast although it wasn't restful. He tossed and turned due to his body still trying to get the remaining alcohol out of its system.

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Some time later Spike had fallen into a deeper slumber and was dreaming of a certain blonde girl again. It were completely the same pictures and feelings provided by his subconscious and again a smile crept over the face of his sleeping form.

He felt something damp in his face and his neck again and his dream once again provided him with the pictures and feelings of Buffy raining his body and face with kisses. Somehow his sleeping brain remembered the ending to the first dream and Spike once again found himself muttering something in his half sleep.

"I told you to fuck off and die, Harm" his words finally could be understood after some not so successful attempts on speech. He slowly started to wake up completely but it still would take some minutes for him to be his conscious self again.

"Well, I guess I am once again glad that I am not her" Buffy's voice filtered through his head. Against his own prediction it took him only a second to be fully awake and alert. His eyes opened instantly and he stared at the blonde sitting in her wheelchair next to his bed. A bowl of water, at least he assumed it was water, stood on the nightstand and Buffy held a damp washcloth in her hands.

"Hey, glad you're still alive" Buffy smiled at him "I kinda worried after you fainted last night."

"What…what time is it?" Spike asked in a raw voice.

"Late afternoon" Buffy answered "you want some water and some aspirin perhaps?"

Spike only nodded and closed his eyes again. The throbbing in his head still wasn't gone although it wasn't nearly as bad as earlier that day. Seconds later Buffy put two pills into his open hand and handed him the glass of water after he had put the pills into his mouth. He had opened his eyes again and Buffy saw that they were blood red. She still was a bit concerned but was more than glad that he was awake again at least. She had panicked mildly after he had fainted in "her" room yesterday evening until Cordelia and Xander had calmed her down and told her that he would be alright.

"Thank you" he told her and chuckled slightly after he had swallowed the medicine and emptied his glass of water.

"What's so funny" she asked and then again smiling answered "and by the way you're welcome."

"Well, originally I should be nursing you" he told her while she once again brought the washcloth to his forehead and neck "not the other way round."

"I think you are certainly in no condition to nurse anybody right now" she had to giggle and Spike groaned "and even more important, you have been taking care of me so well the last days and been caring and sweet all the time although I have been a bitch and I kind of want to return the favour to you even if it might not be possible to make up for the bitch-thing…" she lost a little bit of her bravado and turned her hazel eyes from his storming blue ones.

Spike just smiled at her in return when she finally looked up again and closed his eyes. The pills slowly started to work their magic on his body and he welcomed the feeling of release with arms wide open. The tension slowly slipped from his body and the headache released its grip on his skull.

"Well…I…I…I also wanted to talk to you about yesterday afternoon" Buffy stuttered.

Spike opened his eyes again to look at her. She held his gaze and didn't flinch when she felt him trying to read in her hazel orbs. He didn't seem to have found anything he wanted and so he closed his eyes again.

"I don't think I'm up for such a conversation again, pet…" Spike said but was interrupted by Buffy.

"I…I…kinda need to do it now before I have time to wimp out…" she broke off and once again turned her gaze away from him. The bravery she had shown moments before had made a run for the exit.

When Spike didn't respond she took it as a sign for her to continue.

"Why did you drink yourself nearly to death?" she blurted the question out before she could stop herself. "So much for apologizing, Buffy" she thought.

His only response to her question was a raise of his scarred left eyebrow.

"I didn't do it by my free will" she continued still not looking at him "he kissed me and you saw it before I stopped him. I told him to get lost but he wouldn't leave until Cordy threatened him with calling the police" at that a low growl once again came from Spike. Although he didn't open his eyes and except for the growl he didn't show any signs of anger his brain worked in overdrive. It still hurt but his anger towards the physiotherapist fuelled his thoughts and so he ignored the presence of the pain. He would rip the bugger into pieces.

"I…I didn't want to…to hurt you…or your feelings…or maybe I didn't because you don't feel anything…" she was babbling now and Spike somehow found it amusing "but I know how I would feel…and I do think there is something…"

She couldn't finish her sentence or more her incoherent babbling because of Spike suddenly pulling up her head by her chin and kissing her. It was that special kind of kiss, the one that left you breathless, brainless and boneless. This one you would feel through your whole body. It wasn't bruising, but it also wasn't too soft. It was just right and he seemed to know just when to nibble and when to use his tongue. He tasted like cigarettes and alcohol and something she defined as uniquely Spike. She thought she could drown in that taste itself. She felt her body tingling in all the right places and her muscles tensing throughout her whole body. The feeling had reached her toes that were now curling when Spike finally broke form the kiss to give themselves the needed oxygen.

"That…that…was…" Buffy couldn't form a thought. She was completely spaced out.

"Wow?" Spike tried to help her out a smile on his lips.

"Yeah…"suddenly Buffy' brain registered that she had moved her toes "oh my god, my legs…"

"What's up, pet?" Spike asked alert.

"My toes, they…they moved when… when we kissed" she still tried to process that fact.

"Well that's good then, I guess" Spike smiled at her now a little more relaxed again.

"Good? Are you kidding me? Kiss me again…" she leaned forward.

"Who am I to question her motives…" Spike thought and happily complied to her request. They kissed again when suddenly the door opened. Both of them didn't really recognize it and also both of them honestly didn't care right now.

"Hey you two, I just wanted to…" Cordy's voice filtered through the room until she lost her thought at the sight in front of her. "Well, you know, nevermind…" and with those words she turned around to leave again. The door wasn't closed again before it flew open one more time and an infuriated blonde by the name Harmony Kendall stormed into the room.

"What the hell…" she screamed "Spike what are you doing" she turned her head to stare at Buffy "you dirty little slut…"

Xander entered the room after he had heard the yelling once again after this morning. He came to stop next to Cordelia and watched the scene in front of him. After a few moments he turned to Cordelia to whisper into her ear.

"And again I say…there's one blonde too much in here."

To be continued…

Upcoming: Chapter 10: Never again