Healing

Part 10

Spike stood under the hot spray, hard cock in hand and let his memories overtake him. He knew he'd have no peace at all sitting that close to Xander if he didn't take care of his hard-on first. He brought himself off quickly, moaning Xander’s name with his climax. After quickly washing the evidence of his release from his body, Spike stepped out and towelled off.

"Bloody pillock. He's sure to figure something’s up, already had a shower today!"

Spike got dressed and left the bathroom, he went straight into the kitchen and grabbed some blood from the fridge. He ripped into it and drank it cold. It was disgusting but it satisfied his need for blood and a little bit of violence. He couldn't wait for sundown, the demons were in for a very tough night tonight. Spike had a lot of sexual tension and humiliation to work off. Hopefully Xander would agree to patrol with him tonight, he still didn't feel safe out on his own.

When Spike came back into the living room Xander wasn't there. He looked around and then saw a note on the coffee table. It said that Xander had gone to pick up Chinese food and would be back in a bit. Spike let out a breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding and let himself relax. He just needed to get himself under control. Yeah, he could fully admit to himself that he was in love with Xander, had enjoyed shaggin' him immensely, and would like to do so again in the future. But he wasn't so sure he was ready to take that step yet - having a physical relationship. If it hadn't been for the poison he wouldn't have shagged Xander last night, no telling when he would have. The idea of having Xander make love to him scared him shitless. He wasn't ready to be penetrated, not yet and maybe not for a very long time - if ever.


Xander waited until he heard the shower start, he was pretty sure he had figured out what was going on with Spike - if the bulge in his pants was any indication. Knowing that Spike might need a little space and privacy afterwards Xander decided to go out and pick up dinner. There was a good Chinese food place close by and Xander knew that Spike really liked the teriyaki chicken and the Singapore noodles.

He decided to walk as it was only a block from his apartment, and it was still light out. Besides that, it gave him time to think. The shower was going to be getting a lot of use in the next little while. Once he had realized that he was in love with the blonde menace he came to the decision that he would do everything he could to get Spike better, even if that meant trying to find a way to take out his chip. Spike would never feel completely safe while he had it, not knowing that he was defenceless. Xander understood that feeling all to well, he had been defenceless against his father for years.

Surgery wasn't an option. He knew that because of the time that Spike and Harmony kidnapped that doctor. So he could only think of two things, magic or technology. He knew there was a spell somewhere that could be used to take out the chip. Hell, Willow could probably do it with out blinking an eye, not that he'd trust her to - she was too out of control and could accidentally kill Spike. The other option was finding a way to short out the chip. Computers crash all the time, Murphy’s law governs the fact that the more expensive and complex the equipment, the easier it will fail you.

Having gotten dinner, Xander was headed back home. He decided to try the technological route first, he would pick up some books on computing and repair. They would most likely have a 'do not' section in them that would give him some ideas. He wouldn't tell Spike about this yet, not until he had a working theory. He didn't want to get his hopes up for nothing.

Spike heard the key turn in the lock and went to the door to help Xander bring in the bags.

"Hey, did you find the note?"

"Yeah. Did you get that chicken thing I like?"

"Yep, got the noodles too."

Xander got dishes and utensils from the cupboard while Spike unpacked the bags. They both used forks as Xander had never mastered the art of chopsticks and Spike refused to eat with a miniature stake. After loading their plates down with food and grabbing a couple beers from the fridge they settled on the couch in front of the TV.

"So Spike, you want to go out and beat up bad guys tonight?"

"Sounds like fun."

"We have to go see G-man first. Fill him in on big, grey and ugly."

"Right. We better do that, don't want a bunch of randy vampires running around the Hell mouth."

Xander swallowed hard and tried to force away the image of a certain 'randy vampire' spread out naked across his bed. It was not easy and his now painfully erect cock wasn't making it any easier.

Spike could smell the sudden arousal pouring off the man beside him. He felt like an ass for bringing that up. Sometimes he just didn't think before he spoke. Although, it was nice to know the boy was still affected by him. Neither spoke after that, they finished their dinner pretending to be engrossed in the television. Xander took their plates to the sink and rinsed them as Spike pulled out stakes and a couple small axes for patrol.

The walk to the Magic Box was slightly tense and uncomfortable. Xander knew he had to do something to change that or this whole living together thing would be unbearable. He took a deep breath and put his hand on Spike's shoulder to stop him.

"Look, this is ridiculous. We can't be walking around on eggshells with each other. We had sex, there I said it. It happened, I liked it, I don't regret it at all but I know that it won't happen again. It was too soon for you to even think about doing it, and I understand that completely. So can we just relax with each other and try to move past it?"

"Yeah, you're right. It was too soon, and I'm glad you understand that. But I don't exactly regret it either, you did something for me that no one else ever did, and I can't regret that. I won't. But it is pretty stupid to tiptoe around each other innit?"

"Yep. So, what did I do?"

"You took care of me. I was in a bad way and you made me feel better, no ones ever done anything that selfless for me before. It was... Nice."

"Right, so we're good? No more acting like a couple of blushing virgins around each other?"

"We're good. Now lets get this trip to the bloody watchers over with so's I can go kill something eh?"


Inside the shop things were getting a bit tense. Spike and Xander had described the demon from last night and as Spike had suspected Giles was very aware of its effects on both humans and more importantly vampires. Giles was already suspicious of what exactly was going on between Xander and the vampire, and the fact that their story seemed to have a few holes in it wasn't sitting to well with him.

Buffy on the other hand was more concerned about with the fact that a bunch of lust crazed vampires running could do serious damage to the town, not to mention its' residents.

"So your saying that vamps actually pay to be poisoned by these demons? That's just so... Eeeeww!"

"Well, not so much now a days, but it was a big bloody thing back in the sixties. All those damned flower children getting turned."

"But you guys are okay? You got away from it?"

"Yep. Fangless here saved me."

Spike and Xander shared a smile over the once hated nickname. They both knew it was just for cover now. Same as when Spike referred to him as 'Whelp'. The others hadn't noticed that the frequency of their verbal spars had lessened or that the insults weren't near as biting as they once were. Giles noticed, but he was a watcher after all. He also was the only one privy to Spikes emotional meltdown the night of the Zhurk'thang demon. He was certain there was something going on between the boy and the vampire, he just wasn't sure what it was or if he even wanted to know. Sometimes ignorance truly was bliss.

Giles filled the group in on the proper technique to kill the demon, and they all headed out for patrol. Buffy, Willow and Tara went one way while Xander and Spike took off in the opposite direction. They were both hoping that they didn't run into the demon again tonight.

When the guys ran into a pack of fledges in the newest of Sunnydale’s many cemeteries it looked like Spike had gotten his wish. He dove at the one closest to him and began to beat him to a bloody pulp. He staked him and moved on to the next just as Xander had taken out his first vamp as well. What happened next was unexpected.

"Well, hell! I remember you. You're that pretty boy I had such a good time with the night I died."

Spike and Xander turned as one to the voice that they both instantly recognised. Xander’s reaction was far better than Spikes. As Xander moved toward the vampire, rage clouding his thoughts, Spike began to tremble in fear. The memories consuming him once again.

"I remember you too boy. Hit me with a pole didn't you? Left me there to die."

Xander spared a glance behind him at Spike and saw that the vamp was not really there.

"Spike! Snap out of it!"

Spike shook his head and looked at Xander.

"He's been turned Spike. Revenge?"

Spike smiled a truly evil grin and strolled toward Xander and the fledge.

"Oh yeah, pet. I can do that."

The fledge was too stupid to realize he was in the presence of a Master vampire. Xander saw the other two fledges stop to watch the proceeds - stupid fledges. Xander walked up behind them and staked them both through the back. As they exploded into ash, Xander got a good view of Spike working out his issues. What he did to that minion in the alley was a kiss and a pat on the head compared to what he was doing to the hapless fledge he held in his grasp.

Xander wondered about his earlier decision to deactivate Spike's chip. As he watched the blonde decimate his prey, he couldn't help but wonder if he would revert back to the monster in front of him. Then again, Xander had pictured himself doing similar things to both his father and his uncle. He knew the only thing stopping him was his soul, and Spike didn't have that to hold him back. But just because he was taking revenge on one of the monsters who had raped him, it didn't mean he would give in to his baser instincts all the time.

Spike was having a good time now that he had overcome his initial fear. He was taking back a part of his dignity and pride, piece by piece. He was carving it from the hide - literally - of the vampire on the ground in front of him.

Xander sat back against an old tomb and watched Spike. He knew he was in for a long night when he saw the fledge pass out and Spike stop what he was doing to wait for him to wake up again.

"Xan? You don't have a problem with this, do ya pet?"

"Nope. Have fun. After what he did to you, he deserves it."

"This could take a while."

"I've got no place better to be. Why? Did you want some privacy?"

"No! Uh... Actually I'd appreciate it if you stayed. Not quite up to being on my own yet luv."

Xander got up and walked over to Spike. He dropped into a crouch in front of him and took his bloodied hands into his own. When Spike looked at him he smiled.

"You'll get there, and until you do, I'm gonna be here. For as long as you need, okay?"

Spike swallowed hard and nodded. He wasn't sure he was capable of speech at that moment. He felt Xander squeeze his hands reassuringly before leaning forward and kissing him very softy on the forehead.

"I'll be over there, looks like he's coming around a bit."

Xander went back to his spot against the tomb and watched as Spike roused the fledgling back to consciousness so he could torture him some more. It was going to be a very long night but Spike needed this so Xander stayed.