The Bites of Lust

CHAPTER 9


"Where is Faith?"


Buffy did not answer. Hand in hand with Angel, she was walking among the graves searching for possible vampires. Angel frowned. He had been sensing the embarrassment in the Slayer since she had fetched him to patrol. He stopped and forced her to look at him.


"Buffy. Where is Faith? Usually, you patrol with her, dont you?"


"Yes, I... I dont know... Its been five days since Ive seen her, she may be tired..."


Buffy was avoiding looking in the vampires eye, and was desperately trying to hide her guilt.


"Faith? Tired? Youre kidding me?"


"No, I dont know... Why should I know what shes doing anyway?"


Angel felt Buffy was on the defensive.


"Listen. Its been days since you talked enthusiastically about her to me, since you spent all your time with her, and here, suddenly, nothing. Have you fallen out with her?"


"Yes... A little... Actually, I dont want to talk about it..."


They resumed their walk silently until Angel abruptly froze, a few instants later.


"Whats up? A vamp?"


"Yes... I..."


Angel could feel the presence of a vampire, but above all he perceived the power emanating from this creature, a power he had only felt with the most ancient, Darla or the Master... That one was dead... Could it be Darla? Angel doubted it: he knew how to recognize hormeormer lover, her smell, her vampiric aura. And this one was different, stronger. It was impossible: Darla and he were the oldest and strongest vampires still alive.


***

Lurking in darkness, Faith was observing the two lovers.

She had stayed three days in her crypt, feeding on the few rats which had ventured near her. Each time, she had felt the same nausea, then disgust, and hunger, terrible, painful, always imprinting her the image of the young man and his delicious blood, though incomparable with Drusillas. She could not bear it any longer, so she had finally gone out and wandered in the cemeterys alleys in search of bigger prey, a cat or a dog, helped by her extraordinary abilities she only began to comprehend. She had felt blood, human blood, discovered it sitting on a bench, a couple of lovers who did not even see her. She had fled to the other end of the cemetery to resist the more and more consuming temptation.

Then she had felt another creature of the night, had recognized so easily its demonic mark cursed with a tortured soul.


Angel.


She gave a bitter smile in front of the fates irony. Angel was now probably the closest person to her, the person with whom she had the most in common. Maybe would she have more chances with Buffy now that she had become in her turn a broody vamp with a soul? No, she had definitely lost her. She never could stand in front of her with this monstrous appearance, ultimate fall, ultimate failure of her life. And then the image of the boy she had drained, such as a vile and uncontrollable beast, kept haunting her, reminding her she had yielded to her instinct, she had been unable to resist, she had killed a human being to appease her inhuman thirst. She was seeing again his terrorized, incredulous eyes, his torn throat. How could Angel survive every day knowing what he was, living eternally the sufferings of his innocent victims?


What am I going to become?


As, with this thought, a chasm was opening before her, she felt Angels mind scanning the surroundings in search of the unknown vampire. She was too inexperienced to take the precaution of closing her mind - she did not even know she could do it - and she preferred to flee before he discovered her hideout.


"Angel?"


The vampire was on the lookout. This ancestral presence unsettled him deeply. Then suddenly, he no longer felt anything.


"Its gone." he said simply.


"Its not funny... Now they are on their guard..." Buffy commented, disappointed.


They went on patrolling for a few hours without finding one vampire, then came back home separately, Buffy having to prepare a test for the next day



***


In his mansion, standing near a chimney fire, Angel was still trying to understand what he had felt in the cemetery. He had been mulling over the hypotheses in his head for more than one hour when he was abruptly overwhelmed again by the power of this unknown vampiric presence. It was everywhere, was filling the room, overcoming his mind. Curiously, through strength, Angel managed to perceive fear and despair. How could a creature that was emanating such power feel this kind of feelings? Whoever it was, it was not far.

Suddenly, he heard the knocker hitting the heavy entrance door. For the first time in years, Angel could not repress a shiver of dread. He slowly opened the door, ready to fight.


"Faith?!"


Angel was disconcerted by the sight he had before him. The Slayer, thinner and pallid, was huddled up on the ground, her arms folded across her chest, her look lost and scared.


"Please... it hurts... Help me..."


He wanted first to believe the creature had harmed Faith and that she had come back there. Then he sounded out the Slayers mind and the truth imposed itself to him. Faith was the creature. Faith had become a vampire.


"Angel... Help me... Please..."


The vampire shook himself up and helped Faith to her feet again. He slipped his arm round her waist to hold her and make her enter, and put her delicately in a seat near the fire. Faith was trembling all over.


"Youre hungry, arent you?" asked Angel softly.


Faith, whose look had carefully avoided meeting the vampires one since the beginning, gazed finally at Angel. He could read in her dark eyes an infinite distress, a distress so familiar to him; that of the human condemned to evil immortality, that of the vampire chained by a soul. That of the creature who will never have its place anywhere.

Angel went away for a while and came back with a glass filled with a dark liquid. The bloods heady smell aroused a delicious thrill in Faiths body, who caught herself salivating. With a shaking hand, Faith took the glass, hesitating, as if she was about to go beyond the point of no return again, to become uncontrollable, as if drinking this blood she knew though to be animal was going to soil her soul again.


"Drink."


"Drink... Ill make you my child... my child of darkness... Youll never be alone again... Drink..."


Drusillas image and voice superimposed suddenly with Angels ones. She saw herself in the vampires arms, her lips marked with the blood of her offered breast, this exquisite and unforgettable blood, this blood with which she had signed her ruin, sealed her fate for ever. And then she saw herself made up with this boys blood, she saw the torn throat, the vital liquid gushing out of the gaping wound, she could hear his cries, his tears, his useless moans in front of the madness which had seized her, in front of this evil which guided her and split her into two.


"No!!!"


Faith threw the glass across the room, splashing the walls and carpets with blood. She ed ted to rise, but Angel held her tight in his arms to try to calm her down, understanding at last her tragic path through the images he was reading in her mind.


"Faith, Faith! Its just me, Angel! Dont worry, itll be ok... Calm down!"


He could feel this huge strength inside her trying to get free, but the hunger was so intense that it was weakening her, and Faith finally yielded to her pain, letting her crimson tears run freely and surrendering in the vampires embrace, her body trembling with sobs. They remained that way for long minutes, Angel caressing Faiths hair, waiting for her to calm down gradually.


"I will help you, Faith. You wont face this all alone, Ill help you. But you have to trust me..."


"What am I going to become? Im a monster..."


"I know what you feel... I know this suffering... And there are thousands of victims yelling in my head, Faith..."


Angel put Faith in the seat and went away to look for another glass.


"But youve got to feed first, or else the hungers gonna devour you and youll be tempted to... kill..."


Faith looked at the glass with disgust and desire at the same time.


"Its just pigs blood... bought in the slaughter house."


She grabbed the glass from Angels hand and downed it in one gulp.


"Again."


Angel smiled and brought her others she drank greedily.


"Its not... the same..." she said hesitantly when she was no longer thirsty.


Angel did not need to ask her for an explanation. Some things were obvious.


"No. It will never be the same as human blood, never as... good... But its the only way to survive while going on looking oneself in the face."


Faith could not prevent herself from smiling.


"I remind you we cant look at ourselves in the mirror anymore, Angel... And its you who has 200 years experience?"


"But in 270 years, Ive never met a Slayer vampire, I dont know what youre capable of..."


Faith became gloomy again. She thought about Drusillas words again.


"Youre a unique and interesting experience: mixing the powers of vampires and Slayers, whats more exciting?"


"Yes, its true. What an exciting experience!" she said bitterly.


"Im sorry, Faith. I didnt mean..."


"What I dont understand, " she resumed interrupting him, "is why Ive still got my soul."


"Maybe because youre the Chosen one. And cause Slayers have to stay pure."


Faith considered Angels words for a while, then the chasm opened again in front of her.


"But what am I going to become, Angel? Im useless! Im a nonsense!"


"This is where youre wrong, Faith. Look at me. Our conditions are alike. I swore to spend eternity expiating my crimes fighting against evil. Our might is a good fortune. Yours seems to be phenomenal. Use it in that endless battle were doing with the others. With Buffy. Buffy is not eternal. You are."


"Buffy..."


When she heard that simple name, a wave of despair overwhelmed the Slayer, who relived the events leading her to the fatal night. Desire. Rejection. Drunkenness. The humiliating capture. And her mind still open revealed her feelings for the blonde Slayer to a stunned vampire.


"You... You... You and Buffy, you had..."


Faith then understood a little too late that Angel could read in her thoughts, as she had done herself with Drusilla. He rushed at her, and, grabbing her by her jacket, he struck her in the face, hurling her back. She landed heavily to the ground.


"I... Im sorry... Angel..."


"How dare you come here and ask me to help you after having slept with my girlfriend?!!"


He rushed at her again, pinning her to the ground, and he poured on her a hail of punches in her face as if to erase the too much real image of their two embraced Slayers bodies, the image of their ecstasy, imprinted in his mind.

Pain and despair began overcoming Faith, arousing in her her aggressiveness growing at the rate of the blows.


"Angel... Stop it! Dont force me to..."


And when Faith felt the blood of her cut lip running in her mouth, an animal rage seized her and her face changed. Her features contorted and threatening canines emerged; she gave a roar which had nothing more human and got rid of Angels body, who held her, as if it was just a child. He rolled aside, but she grabbed him by the collar of his coat and hurled him against a wall. He seemed so light. So feeble. Despite his game face he just changed into in his turn.

She pursued him and gave destructive kicks and punches which made him fly like a dislocated puppet. Then, when he ceased going back onto the offensive and he collapsed, she moved slowly closer to him, her human face returning, and fell to her knees, her tears running again.


"Dont let me down, Angel... Dont let me down... I couldnt resist alone..."


"Go... away..." he managed to mumble with difficulty, his face covered in blood.


"Please... Dont let me..."


"GO AWAY!!!"


So Faith rose and slowly backed out of the mansion, her imploring eyes plunging into Angels. And when she finally crossed the threshold, the harrowing chasm of the unknown opened in front of her and swallowed her.


What am I going to become?


*****

To be continued in Chapter 10