Surprise Innocence Twisted
Surprised Innocence Twisted_7
Surprised Innocence Twisted_7
“What’ up with you Spike?” Buffy asked casually leaning against the railing of the back porch. “I’ve never seen you this quiet.”
“Just thinkin’ is all…” Spike replied carefully blowing his smoke away from Buffy and staring back out into the yard.
“Well duh! What are you thinking about?” She asked watching his profile.
“Your Mum…she’s…I can’t believe she didn’t throw me out of here…didn’t want to show her my demon…but she…” He looked up at her, with unshed tears in his eyes. “She didn’t look at me like the evil soulless thing that I am…she still looked at me as if I was a man…”
Buffy sat down beside him when he tossed the cigarette butt on the ground and stompe ben beneath his boot. She leaned ever so slightly against him. “I don’t…Spike…I’m really trying to trust you…and I do…I do…it’s just that…what guarantee do I have that…I mean what if you decide…you know that I’m not worth it…not enough…I know I can be…quite cranky and difficult at times…that’s not gonna change.”
“Only guarantee you have slayer is my word. My word is my bond. I love you with everything that I am…everything…I don’t ever want to disappoint you…and as for you being ‘cranky and difficult’ it’s part of you pet… I certainly wouldn’t want to change that.”
“Spike…I didn’t mean…” She said pulling away and starting to stand.
Spike grabbed her hand and pulled her back down beside him. “No…you wait a minute here…before you go running off I have a few things to say…You listen to me. I’ve been alive a bit longer than you and dead a lot longer than that. I’ve seen things you couldn’t imagine and done things I’d prefer you didn’t. I don’t exactly have a reputation for being a thinker. I follow my blood, which doesn’t exactly rush in the direction of my brain so I make a lot of mistakes. A lot of wrong bloody calls. A hundred plus years and there’s only one thing I’ve ever been sure of. You.”
Buffy couldn’t take the raw emotion staring back at her through liquid pools of blue, she turned her head, staring at the ground she waited for him to continue.
“Hey, look at me.” He said gently grasping her chin and forcing her to look into his eyes. “I’m not asking you for anything. When I say I love you, it’s not because I want you, or because I can’t have you. It has nothing to do with me. I love what you are, what you do, how you try. I’ve seen your kindness and your strength. I’ve seen the best and the worst of you and I understand with perfect clarity exactly what you are. You are a hell of a woman. You’re the one, Buffy”
“I’m scared Spike…I…I think maybe…I could love you one day…but it’s so hard for me to give my heart away…”
“I’m not askin’ for that…all I’m askin’ is that you let me be here for you…let me love you. All I want is to make you happy…to be a better man. For you. What ever happens between us…I’ll be satisfied if I just…if I can just be a part of your life…”
“I don’t know how everyone’s going to react…Giles will probably have a coronary…”
“Do you want me to go? Not look back?” He asked softly. As soon as the words left his mouth he bit his tongue knowing that even if she said yes he still wouldn’t leave.
She looked him in the eye. “No. I don’t want you to leave…I didn’t want you to leave then, when I… I gave my body to you…but you did. That hurt. I felt like I did something wrong…like I wasn’t good enough.” She closed her eyeshtinhting back the tears. That was one of the hardest statements she had ever made, even though it was one of the most truthful.
“I’m so sorry I put you through that Luv. It’ll never happen again…I’ll never leave you again.” Spike said softly pulling her closer.
“I just…I need time Spike…” She said softly once she got her unshed tears under control. “I need time to let this happen…to be oth lth letting myself fall…”
“I know luv, that’s why we’re taking it slow…”
“Yeah…slow…” She said softly laying her head on his shoulder. His arm automatically wrapped around her and his fingers stroked her hair. “Love your hair…so soft…and you smell so good…” He murmured leaning in to her and inhaling her scent.
“Did you find a place to stay yet?” She asked suddenly. ‘He’s smelling me. I can’t believe I like that. I used to hate it when Angel did it.’
“You have to let me compliment you without changing the subject Buffy. And yes I did. There’s a crypt in Restfield…” Spike murmured pulling her into his lap.
“No.” She said turning to look at him.
“No?” He questioned, his thumb tracing hottoottom lip.
“You can’t stay in a crypt Spike…” She said once his thumb had finished with her lip it took on a mind of it’s own trailing down her throat, over his mark and ever so softly brushed against her collar bone. She shuddered in pleasure.
“Got nowhere else Luv, s’noke Ike I can rent an apartment…don’t have an identity…”
“If I asked you would you stay here?” Spike leaned into her touch when her hand came up and cupped the side of his face.
“Are you askin’?” Spike asked looking into her eyes unbelievingly.
“Yes. Will you stay? I…I really need to be held…” He could see the vulnerability on her face, plain as day. ‘Didn’t think I’d ever see her look at me quite like that.’
Spike’s only reply was to scoop her up and carry her into the house.
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That's all I wanted
Something special, something sacred
In your eyes
For just one moment
To be bold and naked
At your side
Sometimes I think that you'll never
Understand me
Maybe this time is forever
Say it can be
That's all you wanted
Something special, someone sacred
In your life
Just for one moment
To be warm and naked
At my side
Sometimes I think that you'll never
Understand mBut But something tells me together
We'd be happy
*Baby*
*Oh baby*
Put your tiny hand in mine
*I'd love to*
I will be your preacher teacher
Anything you have in mind
*It would make me*
*Very happy*
*Please let me*
I will be the one who loves you
Until the end of time
That's all I wanted
That's all I wanted Just to see my baby's
Green eyed shine
This time I think that my lover
Understands me
If we have faith in each other
Then we can be strong
Put your tiny hand in mine
I will be your preacher teacher
Anything you have in mind
I will be the one who loves you
Until the end of time
If you are the desert, I’ll be the sea
If you ever hunger, hunger for me
Whatever you ask for, that's what I'll be
So when you remember the ones who have lied
Who said that they cared
But then laughed as you cried
Beautiful Darling
Don't think of me
Because all I ever wanted
It's in your eyes baby, baby
And love can't lie, no...
*Greet me with the eyes of a child*
My love is always telling me so...
*Heaven is a kiss and a smile*
Just hold on, hold on
I won't let you go, my baby
Put your tiny hand in mine
I will be your preacher teacher
Anything you have in mind
*So I am gonna love you*
Until the end of time
I will be the one who loves you until the end of time
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Buffy wrapped her arms tighter around his neck and rested her head on his shoulder. He carried her all the way up to her room and lay her gently on her bed. She watched him take off his boots. “You sure about this?” He asked.
“Yeah…I’m sure…I want you to hold me…I want…I want to be with you…” She said shyly. She moved over and made some room on the bed for him.
“You’re Mum’s not gonna…” He glanced towards the door. It was shut firmly, but not locked.
“Don’t be ridiculous…She wants me to give you a chance…she heard you on the porch when you said you loved me…” Spike crawled into bed and wrapped his arms around her.
“You gonna be able to sleep with me here?” He asked even as she cuddled closer and draped her arm across his stomach. “I know you think I’m gonna…bite you or something…but I promise you luv, I’ll never do that again…I was taken by surprise, and my demon…”
“I…I know that Spike. I think I’ll be able to sleep really well with you by my side.” Buffy suddenly blushed and buried her face in his shoulder. ‘Better your arms around me than wrapped up in your Duster.
Spike could feel her trembling against him. He was stunned speechless for a few moments.
“Did you hear me?” She asked.
Spike nodded. He leaned over and kissed her tenderly. Looking into her eyes, he spoke softly. “I have a confession…” Just looking at her like this, he wanted to tell her, give her something.
“What do you mean?” She asked suddenly wary.
“Since that night, the night I made love to you…I haven’t…I haven’t bitten another person…I couldn’t…not after…not after that…”
“How did you survive?” She whispered. ‘He said made love. HE SAID MADE LOVE!
“Drank from Dru…t’s I’d I’d allow myself…once I tasted you luv it was all over for me…you think I wasn’t scared? You affected me…that’s another reason I ran…cause I knew if I was around you…if I couldn’t have you and had to watch Angel…touching you…” He leaned down and kissed her softly again. “I wouldn’t have been able to bear it…and now…now I bag it.”
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Dawn awoke to use the bathroom, when she was finished she noticed her mother’s door was closed. Her door was never closed. Dawn walked over and opened it slowly. She smiled happily when she saw her father wrapped around her mother, holding on like she was a life preserver and he was lost at sea.
Dawn returned to her room to grab her ‘Count’ and then came back. She noticed Buffy wasn’t shrouded in her usual black leather, so she grabbed it from the chair it so haphazardly was thrown over and placed it on the bed beside her mother, on the side away from Spike so she could claim that spot.
She then crawled into bed with them. She had to push her way in between them and she giggled when her daddy growled softly and then sniffed the air.
When Spike realized it was Dawn pushing between him and Buffy he calmed instantly and made room for her.
Buffy murmured something intelligible and turned on her side facing away from them. She warped her arm around the comforting leather and sighed contentedly, once again she fell back into deep sleep.
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Joyce awoke at 7:30 as was her routine, even on a Sunday and went to check on Dawn. She felt momentary blind panic, heart rate increased; breathing deepened and became almost desperate. She opened Buffy’s door to wake her and tell her that Dawn was missing.
The sight that greeted her caused her heart to swell with happiness. There was Dawn cuddled up between both of her parents, Spike on one side all sleep tousled hair with his arm around them both, Buffy on the other, arm against Spike’s, slung over Dawn and resting gently on his hip. The leather Duster Buffy had taken to sleeping with was draped across her waist.
Joyce ran and grabbed her Polaroid, Taking half a roll of film she carried her precious pictures down stairs to watch them develop.
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“Uhhhhhh” Buffy stretched. She felt a warm body cuddled o heo her, actually it was sticking it’s but against her and cuddled up to Spike on the other side of the bed. Buffy leaned over and kissed her cheek softly. Propping her head up on her hand she watched him sleep.
‘He looks so…sweet cuddled up with her. I can’t believe I almost denied them this.’ She was so enthralled by the sight before her she didn’t realize his Duster was spread over her legs.
His eyes snapped open and he stared right into her eyes. “Morning.” He whispered. “See we got us a little sneak scampering into bed with us…” He grinned at Dawn, who was just beginning to stir.
“She must have come in during the night…she does that sometimes.” Buffy smiled.
“Is it ok? I…I didn’t want to send her back to her own bed once I realized what she was doing…”
“It’s fine. She’s gonna be in a great mood when she wakes up.” Spike leaned into her touch when her hand came up and cupped the side of his face. She leaned over Dawn and kissed him softly. Lying back down on the bed she glanced at Spike.
He was staring towards her legs. “What’s that doing here?” He asked nodding towards the Duster wrapped around her legs.
Buffy blushed, almost going purple she was so embarrassed. “I…I…I kept it…when I found out I was pregnant…I started sleeping with it…it smelled like you and I wanted…I don’t know what I wanted but…I never imagined it would be like this…Dawn must have brought it to bed with her…last night was the first night I didn’t sleep with it…cause I had the real thing.”
Spike grinned happily. “Think that’s why she knew me? My scent?” He asked, arm snaking out so he could trace patterns absently on Buffy’s stomach.
“I don’t know.” She frowned. “I never really thought about it.” She looked up at him. “I think it was more than that though…I mean Spike she refused to leave your arms until you told her too. I think she knew that you’d protect her, no matter what.”“Thi“Think so?” He asked glancing down at Dawn.
She opened her eyes and looked up at him. “Daddy!” She climbed on top of him and cuddled into him, taking her ‘Count’ with her. She glanced over at Buffy. “Mommy?” She asked raising one arm in invitation to join the cuddle.
Buffy didn’t need to be asked twice. She scooted over and laid her head on spike’s shoulder. “Famwy.” Dawn said happily.
“Yes baby girl we are a family.” Buffy said softly.
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“Glad you guys finally got out of bed. I’ve been waiting for you so I could make breakfast.” Joyce said when the trio entered the kitchen. She smiled at the sight of Spike carrying Dawn.
“She needs to go into her highchair...” Buffy said pointing it out to Spike. She helped him get her settled.
“Anything I can do?” Buffy asked.
“You could look at the pictures I took this morning…” Joyce said pointing to the pile of them on the kitchen island.
“Pictures?” Buffy asked curiously grabbing the pile and flipping through them. She had tears in her eyes when she was done. Walking over to her mother she gave her a tight hug. “Thank you so much…”
“No problem honey. I couldn’t resist…I went to check on Dawn and she was gone…I wasn’t snooping or trying to…spy or anything…I went in to tell you she was missing and I saw you guys…you looked so…I just had to…”
“Joyce I’m sorry I didn’t mean to just…stay here like that…” Spike said sheepishly.
“Don’t be silly…you’re welcome anytime…in fact as long as Buffy agrees you’re welcome all of the .” J.” Joyce glanced at Buffy to see if she had any objections. When none were forthcoming she looked back at Spike.
“Are you sure Joyce? I know what I am…I know it may bother you…” Spike said looking at the ground.
“I know you’re a good man Spike. I know it. When Buffy wasn’t home that first night and I invited you in…you could have killed Dawn and I easily before Buffy got home, but you didn’t…you didn’t. I also know you love my daughter, and my granddaughter, that’s…that’s all of the insurance I need.” Joyce said placing her hand on his shoulder.
Suddenly Spike grabbed her in a fierce hug. “Thank you. You’ve no idea what that means to me.” He said softly tearing up. “And I do…I love them both so much…”
“I know…and if you ever…not that you would, but just incase…I know how to wield an axe.” Joyce joked, trying to lighten the mood.
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“Hello?” She said picking up the phone.
“Joyce…it’s Rupert…can I speak with Buffy please?”
“Sure Rupert…just hold on a sec…” Joyce called her to the phone.
“Hey Giles…what’s the what?” Buffy asked when she picked up the phone.
“I would like you to come down today, we have to research…there are a few things we need to discuss…”
“Ok…I have a few things to talk to you about too…” Buffy said softly. She was going to tell him about her slayer dream, and that Spike was now staying with them. “We’ll be by just after sunset…”
“We?” Giles asked whipping of his glasses and polishing them furiously.
“Yeah…Spike and I…”
“Spike? What the devil is he still doing around?” Giles almost growled.
“Giles…I am not going to argue with you about this. I’ve made my decision. I’ll explain why I made the decision that I did but it is not up for discussion.”
“But Buffy…”
“No. No Buts. I mean it Giles.”
She was completely unaware that Spike had heard every word she said.
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TBC….
I used PARTS of George Michael’s song Father figure in this story I didn’t think the whole song fit so I just took what I wanted and omitted the rest.