So Damn Domestic

The Same Night. FPOV


I can’t just sit here. I thought that I’d be able to wait for Buffy and the others to do their thing and then get back here. But I can’t. I’m too nervous about what’s happening right now. There are some many things that I don’t know and it’s driving me insane. Like, how many demons are there? What do they look like? How strong are they? Is Buffy leading the fight? Well, the answer to that is yes. She’s going to be in charge no matter what the other slayers say, and that’s what scares me. She’ll keep fighting until she wins because these things are after me. She’ll let herself die before she’ll let them kill me. I know the situation isn’t like it sounds. She wouldn’t give up her life just to save me, she’d give up her life to save me, and our son, and her family and friends and all of the people that we don’t know. Because if these demons get a hold of me then all of those things will die.


Angel and Willow can tell that I’m getting restless. They’re just as anxious as I am right now but I’m the only one who’s showing it. My right leg is shaking up and down as I try to concentrate on the T.V. WIllow thought it might help take our minds off of things if we watch something. Her taste for T.V. shows is just as bad as Buffy’s. I don’t know how me and Kennedy have survived this long. I just can’t stand the voices of the women on that show. It’s not just the voices but they talk really fast and even though I can keep up not much of what they say makes any sense. Whatever, I guess I’m just not a Gilmore fan.


I get up and walk into the training room. While I was passed out WIllow fixed the punching bag. I guess Buffy was too busy ranting to really explain what was going on and she mentioned me breaking the bag so Willow fixed it and put a little more magic behind it so now nothing should be able to destroy it. That’s what she said last time. I walk over to the little table that we have. I picked up a cd and put it in the boom box and skip through until I find the one I want. I press pause and then go over to the cupboard and wrap up my hands in the protective tape. I walk back over to the table and press the play button and turn it up as loud as it will go. There seems to be this vibration all through the room because of the music coming out of the speakers. Then I start to stretch out a little. I listen to the loud, hateful sounding music and I let it fuel me, let it take control of my actions as I beat the punching bag, letting out all of this pent up anxious energy that I have over the thought of losing Buffy.


-Suicide! Don’t give a fuck out this my life or any other. Just go away and let me hang! Impossible to forgive, forget it, murderer! I’m in control! Living a lie. Make you pay at all costs for this. Love sick! Bullshit! Bring it! Decisions making themselves. I don’t need your thorns in my sides! So I die!-


A little over the top and overly dramatic for the situation I know, but the music is hard and raw and everything that I need right now. It’s fueling me, it’s building up a breaking point that I’ll hopefully be able to reach and then all of this tension will be able to just go away. I hate that I’m feeling like this. I hate that there’s nothing I can do, that I’m actually part of the problem and I can’t even help fix it. But I also have a lot of fear going on as well. Fear of losing Buffy, fear of being a single mom, fear that everything I’ve ever cared about is going to be ripped away from me. I can’t take this, it’s just too much to handle. I need to get out of here, I need to go help, to protect her, but I can’t. I have to stay here or else the entire world will suffer.


-Determined! To bring you all down with me. Break you, beat down, no more fucking empathy! From me, for you. Fed up, I’ve had enough! Duality, my war! Existence, instigated controversy! Lay down, sell out, so wrong! Drag the blade and go away. I stand, cold cruel and lost! Take me, I’m ready!-


I don’t think I’d be able to do it. I need Buffy so much. I wouldn’t be able to raise our son by myself. I know I’d screw up. I’d fuck him up the way my mother fucked me up. I know I wouldn’t hit him, or hurt him but I definitely wouldn’t be able to give him the life he deserves. And I know I’d never be able to move on. If Buffy dies then I’m done. I think I would die inside and nothing would ever be the same. I wouldn’t be able to do anything except be depressed. I don’t think I’d be able to look at Mattie. I’d look at him and see her lips, hear her laugh. I wouldn’t be able to. I wouldn’t be able to go one with a living reminder of what I had and will never have again. I’d totally neglect him, and he deserves better then that. He deserves better then what I have to offer.


-I want to eat a bullet! Carve myself! Beat my face catatonic! Dig my brain! No pain! Suffocate! Stomach aches! Don’t give a fuck! I’m out, I’m done! Fuck this shit. You’ve dug the hole I’m lying in! No one! No one could ever understand! My life’s exhausted! No on! No one could ever understand! Pressure constricting! So hard! Like a stone. Fight hard, break bones, break. No one! No one could ever understand! This life I’m in! My world! My rules! My noose! My world! My rules! Fuck you!-


As the last word is yelled out I punch the bag extra hard. I gotta admit Willow’s spell held up pretty well. I’m already tired from beating the bag and that song was only like five minutes long. I’m sweating everywhere, my lungs are burning and my legs are sore from kicking the bag so hard. I collapse to the floor and stare up at the ceiling as I try to get my breathing back under control. I tune out the music and I concentrate really hard. I close my eyes and take in a deep breath. I think of only her and I use our slayer connection to seek her out. It takes a couple of minutes and then I’m able to feel her. I concentrate even harder, go deeper into the little ravine that I’ve created between us. I can see what she’s seeing, smell what she’s smelling, hear what she’s hearing, there’s more but you get the idea right?


The cave she’s in smells like sulfur. I almost want to break the connection on the smell alone but I don’t. She’s determined to win. She believes that she’s going to because she needs to think it or else she might loose. If she thinks of anything else right now she might lose. A couple of the girls have been hurt but they’re still fighting. She’s worried about them but she has confidence that they’ll prevail in their mission. The set up for the ritual is pretty basic. Huge cauldron in the middle of the cave, something funky smelling coming out of it, there’s a couple of dead animals lying next to the cauldron, a couple of large knives are next to the carcasses. The demons themselves are huge and I’m really wishing I where there right now. They’re ten feet tall, built like fucking linebackers, scaly black skin that looks pretty fuckin sharp. They have these horns coming out the side of their heads where a human’s temples would be. The horns curl above their heads and the tips are touching. They’re growling like lions and I really wanna fucking be there.


Buffy turns her head over to the right when she hears a scream. One of the other slayers was just stabbed through the stomach with one of those wicked looking knives. Buffy’s starting to panic a little bit. I don’t know if this is going to work but it’s worth a shot. I gather up all of the positive energy that I can and I send it out to her. I try to force it through the connection and it’s working. She’s calming down and gaining her confidence back. I start whispering lightly and I know she can hear it, even if she thinks it’s just a little thought in the back of her mind. I’m telling her to let go, to unleash the slayer, to stop holding back. I feel her human half start to slip away and she’s nothing but pure energy and violence as she takes out the demons one by one, slicing and hacking away with the long sword she took with her. Their blood is thick and oozes out of their broke bodies like sludge.


The final demon, the leader of the linebackers, ha I am one silly bitch. Anyway, the leader of these guys is huge, larger then the others. He’s at least fifteen feet, the horns are larger, his eyes are glowing a bright orange color. The scales are more like disks sticking off of his body. As soon as I see him, feel his dark presence I know that he’s the one that’s been fucking with me. He’s the only one out of those demons that’s powerful enough to use magic that strong. I see him and I’m filled with anger. He’s the one that made me do those things to Buffy. He made me hurt her, violate her in one of the worst ways. He’s the one that’s been beating me, making me feel weak, making me feel like I want to die. All of that anger and hatred that I’m feeling is crossing through the connection and seeping into her. It amplifies her, takes her strength and power to a whole new level.


The other slayers are circling around behind him. His focus is on Buffy and Buffy alone. They lock eyes and I can see his coldness, I get a chill down my spine because of it. Her anger is growing, fueled by mine, and I can heal her heavy breathing, mine is starting to increase because of it. She lowers herself down, walking with her knees bent, legs like a fucking spring being pulled back and ready to release. Then she does. With a loud battle cry she runs forward and jumps in the air, spinning around in a circle so that the blade of the sword will slice him across his middle. Good in theory but on her way towards him he back hands her with one of his massive hands and she goes flying off to the side. The others attack, striking when they can but it isn’t enough. As she lies on the ground she watches the battle that’s taking place. The others are fighting pretty good some of them are jumping in the air to try and reach his head. This is when he becomes angered, and he fights them off a lot more violent then when they try to stab his stomach or legs. The idea forming in her mind, she stands up and slowly looks around the large cave.


She sees a little ledge about twenty feet high. If she can get up there then she’d be taller then the demon and would have a little bit of an advantage. She runs over to the wall at full speed and total Matrix style, starts to run up the wall until she reaches the ledge. She reaches out and grabs the side of it with her free hand and pulls herself up. She crouches down, making sure that the demons hasn’t seen her. He’s still distracted by the other slayers and she sighs a little breath of relief. She walks down so she’s at the far end of the ledge and patiently waits for her opportunity.


This is better then a fucking movie, I’ll tell you that right now. The suspense is more then I can take. I really, really wish I were there to help her fight. The high that she’s going to feel afterwards is going to be incredible. She’ll be so worked up that she’ll probably hide in the bushes on the way home to work off some of the tension herself. Ok Faith, time to get your mind off of a sexy, masturbating Buffy, you can think about that later. She sees what she’s been waiting for and her muscles tense up, getting ready to pounce. She backs up as far as she can so that she can get a running start, and then she lunges into the air and towards the demon’s head. And when she’s five feet away from him the connection dies and I’m left staring up at the ceiling. What the fuck!


No, no, no! I jump up off of the floor and rush for the front door. Angel sees what I’m doing and since he’s so fucking quick he’s able to jump out in front of me and block my path. Since I’m moving so fast I can’t slow down in time and I run right into him. He wraps his arms around me to prevent me from just pushing him aside and I really wanna stake him right now. I need to get there, I need to help her. She could be dying right now and I’m not there. I won’t get to say goodbye, I won’t get to tell her how much I’ll miss her, how much she’s changed me for the better. I won’t get to tell her that I’m afraid.


Ok, calm down. She’ll be fine, she’s Buffy, she died for God sakes and she’s still alive. This is nothing, just a little obstacle that she needs to overcome. I relax and Angel lets me go. I back away from the door and he steps to the side. I lean up against the wall and I stay completely calm. When he’s far enough away I make a mad dash for the door and before he can react I’m down the steps of the porch and I’ve throw open the gate and I’m running down the driveway. I can hear him chasing after me, but he hasn’t lived in this town for the last seven years. I know these streets like the back of my fucking hand. I turn down a little alley way and jump over a wooden fence. Once I’m in the backyard I run towards the house and jump and grab onto the rain gutter and pull myself up on the roof. I run to the front of the house and jump down and just keep running.


I can feel her so she’s still alive. I have no idea where I’m going I’m just following our connection. I guess the little junction that I made in the training room is still there it’s just weak. It takes me to the other side of town near the high school. I go to the back of the school where there’s a patch of forest. God, is every high school evil? I guess so because the cave is back here. I walk towards the entrance of it and I see the other slayers walking out. Kennedy is carrying an injured girl that I don’t recognize. Buffy is the last to come out. I can smell her from here and I’m thirty feet away. I run up to her, and just like in a cheesey romantic comedy, I lift her up by the hips and spin her around a couple of times. I lower her down and our lips connect. God it feels so good to kiss her without having to worry about being taken over by an evil demon and being forced to try and rape her. Wait, I might have just jinxed it. I pull back and she’s breathing really heavy and subconsciously grinding her hips against mine.


“We can have sex right? I’m not gonna hurt you?” She shakes her head no and kisses me again. Ok wait, no we can’t have sex or no I’m not going to hurt her? I pull back again and look into her desire filled eyes. I have a feeling that even if the demon did take me over she wouldn’t say no to anything it tries to do to her. “Am I going to hurt you?” She shakes her head no again. Good enough answer for me. She grabs me by the arm straps of the shirt I’m wearing and pulls me over into the bushes. Ha! I told you she’d be so worked up she’d fuck in the bushes. Ok, well I said she’d fuck herself, but I’m half right because if I weren’t here I know she’d be fingering herself right now.


She lies down on the ground, her legs are spread and in the air, bent at the knees and as soon as I’m on top of her she wraps them around my lower back to keep me in place. She wants to go slow I can tell, but the animal inside of her won’t allow it. She unleashed the slayer one hundred percent tonight. She’s only done that a couple of times in the past. The after effects of doing that is so fucking wicked. It’s like you’re on top of the world, nothing can reach you, nothing matters but fulfilling the desire that’s screaming out to you. She doesn’t like to let the slayer take charge because she likes to be in control of herself, and when you hand over the control to the slayer you don’t get a say in what happens until the lust for the kill is satisfied.


I go real slow because I want to savor this. Even if we are out in the woods like a couple of teenagers. I kiss her deeply, seek out the hidden bounties of her mouth. She tastes like vanilla, I don’t know how she does it but she always seems to taste like vanilla. She’s grinding against me very quickly, she needs release soon but we’re going to take this slower then that. I support myself with my knees and place my hands over her hips and hold her still. I pull back from the kiss and she gasps for air. I leave little love bites on her throat and gently lick at the salty skin. I hear her whimper and I look up. She has tears in her eyes, she needs release so badly that she’s crying. I’d rather go slow and savor this moment but I can’t, she needs me too badly. I unbutton and unzip her pants and slide my hand inside. She’s so wet right now that I don’t think I’m gonna be able to give her the friction she needs. Maybe after tonight she’ll finally say yes to buying some toys.


She’s grinding quickly against my hand and she’s being as quiet as she can for whatever reasons, I don’t know. I carefully slip three fingers into her tight entrance. She hisses and I stop, thinking that maybe I’ve hurt her. I’m still a little worried that I’m going to do something wrong, that maybe the demon isn’t dead at all, maybe it’s just playing dead and he’s waiting for us to have sex and then he’s going to make me kill her. Alright Faith, enough with the morbid thinking, get your head together. I snap back to what’s going on and she’s thrusting against my hand and moving her hips in a circular motion. Ok so I’m not hurting her after all. See Faith? She’s fine, ok stop talking to yourself it’s weird. Whatever. So I start to thrust in as much as I can. Unfortunately her pants are tight so it’s kind of hard to move my hand around too much. I start to rub her clit with my thumb and I press down really hard. She cries out into the darkness and I feel the gush of her orgasm all over my hand. She’s not satisfied by far, but this will hold her off until we get home.


BPOV


I know this is going to sound weird so don’t laugh, but during the fight I could have sworn Faith was right there with me. It was like she was a part of me, like we were sharing the same body. I even heard her whisper into my ear. She told me to let go, to let the slayer take complete control and I did. I don’t regret it because it was the slayer that ended up saving my life. After I jumped off of the little cliff it was too late to do anything when I realized that I had jumped too far and I was going to land right on top of those nasty horns. But the slayer was in control, so instead of just falling she started to twist my legs around kind of like a cat with twist its tail when its falling, and that slowed me down a little bit. I landed a little high up for my liking, but I was still able to stab the demon in the throat with my sword. I had to jump off because he burst into a huge ball of light, taking my sword with him. I’m gonna miss that sword, oh well.


Anyway, right after the demon was gone and I was able to catch my breath I got the post slaying hornies like you wouldn’t believe. Kennedy had to help me up off of the ground and I had to use every single ounce of self-control not to jump her. Now I’d never ever, ever cheat on Faith, but I really needed release. So when I walked out of the...and is it just me or does it seem like every high school has some type of great evil lurking near it? Back on track here, when I walked out of the cave and saw Faith there I almost couldn’t take it. I pulled her aside and she gave me a little bit of a release but I needed so much more, way more then she could give me right then. I can’t believe I cried. I felt so stupid afterwards but she just wiped my tears away and told me I looked beautiful. Leave it up to Faith to lie to make me feel better.


So right now we’re running back to the house. I’m holding her hand and we’re in the middle of the street. Luckily this town is pretty quiet at night so we don’t have to worry about traffic. I know her feet are going to be hurting soon, she’s still barefoot, and she’s still in her pajamas, well a wife beater and a pair of boxers. I really hope that Angel’s still alive because I know that she would stake him to get to me. I wonder what happened to Willow. Ok, the need is starting to build again. It’s so hard to walk let alone run because I need her so bad and my knees are weak. I slow down to a stop and I breathe out the words ‘carry me’. She picks me up bridal style and carries me the rest of the way. The entire time I’m kissing and licking at her neck and cleavage. That only made her run faster and I can’t help but laugh.


She jumps over the steps of our front porch and lands right in front of the door. I open it up since her hands are full and she steps inside. The first thing I smell is the aroma of sex and I ignore the high pitched moans and squeals that are coming from the other side of the couch as Faith makes a mad dash to the bedroom. She kicks the bedroom door shut and then practically throws me onto the bed. I bounce a couple of times and laugh as she strips off her clothes. I take mine off and throw them in all directions around the room. She crawls towards me and I wrap my hands around the back of her neck and pull her into a burning kiss. Her hand finds my sex and she inserts three fingers. She’s soft and gentle but that’s not what I need right now. I need it rough and raw. I flip her over onto her back, she laughs a little at the way I’m acting but I don’t care. I straddle her waist with her fingers still deep inside. I ride her hard and fast. She can’t keep up with me, at least not yet. Once she gets used to the rhythm she’ll be able to keep up with me. This doesn’t happen often, usually it’s me having to keep up with her, or her having to slow down a little. I think this is taking her off guard but she doesn’t seem to mind.


I feel her fingers wiggle around like she’s playing a guitar or something. I buck harder against her and cry out as her middle finger brushes my G-spot. She presses on it again and another wave of pleasure rushes through me. She reaches down with her other hand and rubs my clit with her fingers, then she gently pinches my twitching muscles. I scream as I come all over her hands and she keeps pumping inside me, drawing out my orgasm for as long as she can. My eyes are closed tightly and every color of Crayola is flashing before my eyes in all sorts of shapes. I finally collapse on top of her, my breathing is ragged and heavy, my skin is dripping with sweat and we’ve only just begun.


She lightly kisses my forehead as I come down from my high. Her arms are wrapped loosely around me. I smile weakly since my face muscles are the first that I can control again. I start to kiss her cheek and then move over to her mouth and claim her lips with mine. She tastes like a mixture of licorice and cloves and over the years I’ve come to love that taste. I swirl my tongue on the roof of her mouth and she growls out. She doesn’t moan, she doesn’t groan, she growls. I press down on her shoulders with my hands, holding her down as I grind against her. I use my knees to spread her legs apart. I reach down with one hand and spread her lips apart. She hisses out and I look into her eyes. She’s being really quiet, she usually talks a lot. I hope nothing’s wrong with her. Is she still afraid that the demon is going to make her do stuff? Because I killed that demon, and it was badass, she would have loved it.


“Babe, what’s the matter?” I ask and lightly kiss the side of her neck. She moans a little and grinds her hips some more, silently begging for contact. Silently, this is really starting to freak me out. She doesn’t say anything, she just wraps her legs around me and gently presses down with her heels. I get what she’s trying to say, but I don’t understand why she isn’t saying it. Oh well, I can always ask afterwards. Now that the slayer part of me is satisfied things aren’t as rushed, we can take our time and enjoy the moment in it’s entirety and not just the release. I reach down with my hand again and open up my inner lips. I lower myself down onto her and we both gasp when our clits touch. We stare into each other’s eyes as if we’re looking for an ending, as if we’re trying to see each other’s souls.


We start a slow rhythm and when we each thrust we moan out our approval. It doesn’t take very long for my orgasm to start to build up. But we continue to go slow, enjoying this most intimate position. She has tears in her eyes, which is a little surprising. She blinks and the tears slowly leak out the corners of her eyes. I lean down and kiss the drops away. I slowly lick my lips and taste the salty flavor. I look back into her eyes and smile a little. She leans up and kisses me, tasting her tears on my lips. We speed up the pace as our climaxes approach. I can tell by her facial expression that I’m closer then she is. I reach down between our bodies and insert two fingers into her. She throws her head back and quickens the speed of her hips. She reaches down and enters me with two fingers as well and I hiss in a breath. I leave soft kisses on her throat and I moan against her as we climax together.


I roll off of her and stare up at the ceiling as we catch our breath. I feel her start to shake and I look over at her. She’s trying not to cry. She gets like this sometimes, I’ve mentioned that she’s needy after sex, right? Well now is one of those times. I wrap my arms around her and pull her close to me. She rests her head on my shoulder and I can feel a couple of tears land on my hot skin. That was intense, more so then usual. A lot of emotions were running through her when she came so I pretty much expected her to be this way. I don’t mind that she gets like this, more cuddles for me. I lift her up her and some how manage to pull the covers over us without ripping them. I tighten my grip on her when I hear her breathing start to even out. I give her a small kiss on top of her head and quickly follow her into the land of slumber.


I wake up alone, which I hate. I look around the room and it’s still dark. I look over at the alarm clock on the nightstand and it reads two thirty-four am. I yawn widely, what the hell am I doing awake? I was just having a great dream. Faith was in a pink skirt and white blouse with these really cute sky blue sandals and she took me on a surprise picnic to this field where we ate strawberries and whip cream and each other. Now I’m awake and feeling a little horny and Faith isn’t even here to help me. I pout and get out of bed. I walk towards the bathroom and see the light leaking out from under the door. Ok, she’s just in the bathroom. I go back into the bedroom and wait for her. I don’t know how long I’ve waited so far but I don’t fight my eyelids as they slowly close and I fall back to sleep.


When I wake up the second time the sun is shining through the window and it’s pissing me off. I feel something lying next to me but it isn’t Faith. I slowly open my eyes and see that instead of being curled up with my lover I’m curled up with the giant teddy bear she bought me when I was pregnant with Matthew. She was gone a lot in the beginning of the pregnancy because Giles needed her in Ohio and she wasn’t sure how long she was going to be gone, and Dawn needed me so I had to stay home. She bought me a giant brown fuzzy teddy bear that’s about the size of her and she sprayed her perfume all over it and even smoked around it to get that clove smell to it. Every night she was gone I’d cuddle up to it and pretend that it was her.


I look over to the door when I hear it open and Faith walks in carrying a tray and two plates loaded with food. I smile a sweet smile at her. She hasn’t made me breakfast in bed in so long. I was still recovering from giving birth. None of our friends had been over because Faith had told them that I still needed my rest and if they wanted to live to see the baby grow up then they’d stay away. The morning after we brought Matthew home I woke up, feeling sore and exhausted and Faith had made pancakes with strawberries, whip cream, some sausage, one cherry flavored pop tart, and a glass of milk. She brought breakfast to me every morning in bed until I was well enough to get up and make my own. I miss being pampered by her, that’s for sure. She’s so tender and loving, most people don’t even realize because they still remember her as the ‘badass psycho slayer’. If only they could see her the way I see her, then they’d know what a good person she really is.


I sit up when she gets closer and she sets the tray down across my lap. Fortunately it has these stands that hold it up otherwise I’d probably drop it. I’m still pretty tired after last night. That was one hell of a fight. I don’t think I’ll ever forget it. She tries to kiss me but I pull away. Now I don’t mind when she has it but I’m way too self-conscious for her to kiss me when I have morning breath. She smiles an understanding smile and crawls on the bed so she’s sitting on her side of the bed. I look down and see that all of the food she made for me the first time she cooked me breakfast in bed is all here, only there’s more because she made a plate for herself. I frown a little when I see that there’s only one fork. She picks it up and cuts a little piece of my pancake for me and holds it up and smiles. I roll my eyes a little bit and she laughs.


“Come on B, let me feed ya. It’ll be adorable.” Did I really just hear Faith say the word ‘adorable’? Wow, looks like Dawn really does owe me some money. I wrap my lips around the fork and slowly pull the food off of it. I give her my ‘yummy face’ and moan my approval. It drives her crazy when I do that. She cuts a piece of food off of her plate and eats it. She’s watching me the entire, and I know by the end of this breakfast she’s going to be very, very worked up, if I have anything to do about it at least. We eat in relative silence except for my moans and the scraping sound of the fork on the plates. She looks over at me like she wants to say something but she’s hesitant. I give her a questioning look and then nod my head a little. “I woke up early couldn’t get back to sleep, I had some time to think.” Her thinking, that’s never good. Almost every time she says that we either have to buy something expensive, have Xander build something or she broke something and is trying to convince me that we don’t need it anyway before she confesses to breaking it. She sighs and then takes another bite of food before feeding some to me. Now that I’m trying to concentrate on something else this isn’t as cute. So we take turns with the fork.


“Ok, I don’t know if I’m gonna be able to word this right so don’t get mad if it comes out wrong.” Ok so we won’t have to buy anything or build anything, but what did she break? “I’ve been thinking ‘bout what you said ‘bout a week ago.” What did I say about a week ago? Hmm, I can’t remember. It could be important but I don’t remember what. I know we were fighting about a week ago, did I say something out of anger that she’s been thinking about? I’ll act like I know what she’s talking about though because I hate when I look stupid. I nod my head a little and take a bite of sausage and then hand her the fork. “I think that maybe, and this is a maybe because we’ll have to talk about it a lot more. But I think it would be nice to have another baby.” What? Did she just say what I think she just said? I’m trying to hold back my smile in case I am going crazy and she really said something else.


“I mean, Mattie’s five, it might be nice for him to have a little brother or sister to look out for, and get into trouble with and argue with and all of the other good sibling stuff.” I take the fork from her despite the fact that she still hasn’t taken a bite, I set it on the tray then carefully put the tray on the nightstand. She’s looking at me a little funny but ignore it as I scoot closer to her so that our bodies are touching and I kiss her deeply, despite the fact that I still haven’t brushed my teeth. I arch my back so that my chest presses against hers, she moans a little and I run my fingers through her hair and gently massage her scalp the way she likes it. She moans louder into my mouth and then pulls back for air. She smiles at me, this huge smile that I can’t help but reciprocate. So we’re really going to be thinking about this huh? And not just think she said that we’re going to talk about it. So we’re really talking about having another baby? “Damn, if thinking ‘about havin one gets you this happy maybe we should have three, maybe four.” I laugh a little and shake my head. I kiss her again, a gentle kiss that doesn’t last as long as the one before it.


“If you wanna give birth to all those babies then I guess we should start with the hot lovin.” I laugh at the little joke but she has what I was classify as a ‘bad reaction’. Her faces pales a little bit and her jaw kind of gapes a little. Ok, what did I say? I wasn’t serious about that, she does know that right? We might have like two more maybe, but I think it would be best if we just have two kids. I’ve always imagined having two kids, I think two would be enough, the stress would probably get to be too much if we have three. “What? Why are you looking at me like that?” She gulps loudly and shakes her a little bit. She runs a hand through her hair and shifts around a little.


“I was sort of thinking that you would have the baby. I mean you had Mattie so the pain won’t be as bad right?” I don’t know. Is the pain just as bad? These are the questions that I really wish I could ask my mother. When Matthew was born I didn’t know what to do. Giles was the one who showed us how to change a diaper. Apparently one of the old Council members that he was friends with had a baby and Giles would watch her while his friend attended to important Council business. I sigh and wrap my arms around her neck. I give her a little kiss on the lips. She still looks really freaked out.


“Well, I’ve been thinking about this for a long time now. I’ve been wanting another baby since Mattie was three, I just didn’t say anything because I wasn’t sure how you would feel about it and Willow doesn’t know the spell that was used. I always thought that you’d carry the second one. I know that it’s a lot of pain, you kind of got a little taste of that because of our slayer connection.” She laughs a sarcastic laugh and I kiss her on the neck. “But having a baby, having a little life growing inside of you...it’s hard to explain, but there’s nothing else like it. It’s such a wonderful experience, and when you finally get to hold that little life in your arms for the first time...it’s like everything in the world is just right, like all of the planets are lining up just to make you happy. And sure, afterwards with the hormones and getting over the trauma that’s a little hard, but...Do you remember the first week we brought Matthew home how I’d feed him his bottle and I’d talk to him and he’d look at me with this look like ‘hey, I know you’?” She smiles and nods her head. “Well, it’ll be a lot like that, I don’t know I guess it just depends on the baby, but I’m sure you and him or her will have that same kind of bond.” Oh yeah, she’s just like melting jell-O now. She kisses me and I can’t help but feel really, really happy. For the first time in the last week or so I’m just really, really happy.


“Ok don’t think that just because I’m kissing you like this that I’m agreein with you because we still have a lot to talk about. And when you were pregnant with Mattie you were really...uh...best way to word this?” she asks herself. “Mean. Yeah, you were a very mean pregnant woman. Do you really think it would be good for everyone around us if I’m like that? ‘Cause I’m sarcastic and bitchy enough as it is.” She goes to keep talking but I cut her off with a kiss. Maybe if I do this enough she’ll finally give in and agree to be the one to have the baby. I really want to her know what it’s like, I want her to have that experience. It’s one of the best things to ever happen to me. No I take that back it wasn’t just one of the best things, it is the best thing to ever happen to me. I want her to know what that feels like.


FPOV


So we’ve been talking about the baby thing for a couple of days now. We’ve been really quiet about it and mostly talking during the day because we don’t want Mattie to hear us and think that we are going to have one because we’re still not sure. We have the spare bedroom that we can always change into a nursery. It looks like I won’t be getting my game room back after all. And there’s so much other stuff that we gotta consider. Like Tucker. He’s been kind of ignored for a while because of all the heavy drama. But he’s used to being around Mattie, a little kid he can rough and tumble with, but a baby? He’s never been around babies before. What if he hurts it? I love him and everything but I’m sure if he ever hurt my baby I’d break his neck with my own hands. Ok, I know I shouldn’t think like that, but it’s true. And I’m not talking about him accidently hurting it, what if he gets so jealous that he can’t take it and he tries to attack it? I’d definitely kill him if he tried that.


There’s other stuff too. Babies are expensive, is Giles willing to give us more money so we’d be able to pay for a baby or should I get a GED and then go to a community college so I’ll be able to get a good job? Now that I’m thinking about this rationally and gotten passed the ‘wouldn’t it be cool?’ stage this is really starting to freak me out. And Mattie was a pretty easy baby to raise. He didn’t cry much, he’d sleep anywhere and he never fought it. What if we get one of those kids who hates going to sleep and will cry for hours just to stay awake? Or one of those kids that has to eat at exactly the same time everyday, or they’ll only sleep in their basinet and nowhere else? Ok, I need to calm down, I can’t breathe. But seriously, what are we going to do? Now that I’ve admitted that I’m willing to talk about it and that I’m open to the idea...I can’t just say no, it’d break Buffy’s heart. She’s wanted another baby for like two years. Alright Faith, time to concentrate.


I’m standing in the training room. We had Xander build us a dummy thing for practice. Me and Buffy carved these little stakes, so cute. Um, not cute, I mean like, ya know, they’re just small. Fuck you, I can say something’s cute if I want. Anyway, I’m standing in the training room my arms are behind my back, my legs spread shoulder length apart, like a total fuckin boot camp leader. I know I look serious even though it’s hard when the person you’re training is just so small and standing there in his little camouflage style pants and black t-shirt, he looks like a little solider in training. All he’s missing is the hat. But I’m sure Buffy will find one of those. She’s the one that found the pants and the shirt. Even the little army boots, those are something to see. Ok totally fucking off topic. He’s not paying attention anymore, that kid doesn’t have the best attention span, you can really tell he’s related to me.


“Mattie, pay attention now. What I’m gonna tell you is really important.” He sighs and turns his attention back to me. He’s the one that wanted to train he could at least do it without that attitude. I wasn’t that bad when I was training was I? God, I hope not because if I was then I know that this is karma saying: ‘see Faith, maybe you shouldn’t have been thinking about Buffy’s ass when you were supposed to be paying attention.’ I sigh and give him this look. “Mattie, you were the one who wanted to do this. Now it took me almost an hour.” Of giving Buffy head. “To get your mother to agree to this. I know this part is a little boring but we’ll get to the fighting soon, ok?” He sighs again and kind of rolls his eyes as if he’s thinking about it.


“Yes sir.” I raise my eyebrow at him and give him this little glare. “I mean, ma’am.” He corrects himself. I smile at him, I really have taught him well. The sir thing used to drive Buffy insane, you should have seen it, it was hilarious. I would go to a flashback and show you but I’m a little busy right now, remind me about it later, k? I walk over to the table and pick up two stakes one my size and one for him. I stand in front of him, about six feet away. We haven’t really tested him a whole lot yet. He broke Spike’s nose so we know he’s strong and he can sense vampires and we know he’s fast because he always runs away from Buffy when she tries to get him dressed after his bath. He likes to be nude, he definitely takes after me.


So, like I said, I’m standing about six feet in front of him and I hold up the stake so he can see it. I toss it to him, a pretty fast toss but if he doesn’t catch it it’ll just hit the mat he’s standing on. Without even breaking eye contact he reaches over with his right hand and grabs the stake in the middle. He holds in out in front of him and looks at it. He hasn’t held one before, until a couple of days ago he hasn’t even seen one. He flexes and un-flexes his fingers around it, getting a good feel for the wood. I look over at Buffy, she’s watching from the couch. She just wants to watch today, she figured that since it was my idea I should be the one to give him the first couple of lessons. But after the first couple she’s going to start teaching him too. If things go well with the first that is. She wants me to make it perfectly clear that we are in no way encouraging him to use his powers in front of other people or to use them to get what he wants. We’re doing this because now that we’re slaying a little more then we used to we might as well teach him some basic defense just in case a vampire tries to attack him while we’re outside or something.


“Ok, now when you’re going to start working out the first thing you want to do is pick a good kind of music for what kind of...” I hear Buffy cough and I look over at her. She’s sort of shaking her head from side to side and I sigh. This is my lesson I don’t think she needs to be criticizing it. Oh well, I guess I’ll just have to go with it. Hey, maybe if I give her an hour of more head she’ll agree to just kind of back off. “Right, stretching is the very first thing that you want to do. Now, watch me and do exactly what I do, ok?” He nods his head and gets kind of excited because he finally gets to do something else but just stand there. I turn so that Buffy will get a good view, gotta please my girl after all, and I bend down and touch my toes effortlessly. I can feel her eyes on my ass and I smile a little bit. I look up and Mattie’s doing the same thing, touching all the way down to the ground perfectly.


“Great, that’s really good Mattie. Now do this.” I stand up and bend my leg back and grad onto the top of my foot and pull it up so that the bottom of my shoe is touching my ass. He’s having a little trouble with this one. I walk over and gently pull his leg back and take his hand and place it over the top of his foot. Once he has a hold of it he’s able to pull it up. “Good, now do it with the other one.” We both repeat the stretch with the other legs and then we sit down and stretch out by grabbing our toes and then I show him how to stretch out his arms. Now that he’s good and limber we can get down to the real training. I’ll teach him about the music later. “Now, what you want to do is stick the pointy end of the wood into the center of the X.” There’re two strips of duct tape over the dummy’s heart making an X.


“Why over the X?” He’s never really questioned me before, but he’s starting to do that more lately. Gets that from his mother no doubt. The way Willow talked it up little miss curious broke up the loyalties of a government military operation by simply asking questions and being the little nuisance that she can be. We haven’t really explained the whole ‘vampires and demons are real so be careful because they’ll try to kill you’ thing yet. We don’t want to give him nightmares. I guess now is a pretty good time to start the explanation. Better idea, I could always leave it up to Buffy. Hmm, do I really wanna be the type of parent that leaves the important conversations up to the mother? As much as I want to say yes I have to say no.


“You know that feeling you got when Mommy’s friend came over a couple days ago?” He nods his head. Normally it takes him a couple of minutes to remember stuff that happened a couple days ago, but I guess that’s a feeling you never forget having though. “Well, you see...he’s...um.” I look over at Buffy with this ‘help me out here!’ sort of look. See this is why I don’t like explaining things like these because I never know how to explain it. I don’t want to say too much and then give him nightmares and I don’t want to say too little and make him think that vampires are good. Ok, I think I know what to say, I’m just not sure. I hate not knowing the answer, it makes me feel so stupid. Alright, enough with the negative thinking. “You remember that story aunt Dawn told you about those bad people who lived in the town that Mommy and me used to live in?” He nods his head. Dawn told him a ‘ghost story’ about the vampires of Sunnydale. It was her way of trying to get him to stop being so friendly towards strangers. This kid has no fear of people that he doesn’t know and it freaks me and Buffy out. When you gotta kid you don’t just worry about demons and vampires gettin a hold of him. Kidnappers and other sick fucks are out there and we’re scared that one day he’s going to be friendly with the wrong person.


“Matthew, remember that movie that uncle Xander let you watch when he wasn’t supposed to?” Apparently Buffy has a better idea. Xander did a really dumb thing and let Mattie watch some old vampire movie. It looked totally fake except for the vampires, they looked kind of like the real thing. Mattie got scared, he thought that vampires were going to come and get him. Buffy told him that a vampire can’t come in the house unless someone who lives there invites them in, apparently the movie left that part out. She also went on to explain that vampires aren’t real. We hate lying to him, that’s one of the reasons why I want to go through this training because I hate letting him believe that there’s nothing evil out there when he’s felt it. “Well, vampires are real. I know that’s scary, but it’s true. Spike is a vampire.” I wasn’t talking about Spike, but now that she’s brought him up I’m pissed off about it all over again. “But he’s different from other vampires because he has a soul.” Ok, she’s making this a little complicated. I think it’s time for me to step in. I pick him up and carry him over to the couch and sit him down across my lap so he can see both me and B.


“Mattie, there are bad things, monsters that are real. And they do hurt people. Mommy and me we fight those bad things.” Ok, it’s time for me to bring out my ‘inner Giles’. “A long, long time ago.” I make sure to stretch out the word ‘long’. I like teasing Buffy about her being two years older then me and what better way then make this sound like it was so many years ago. “There was this girl. She was wicked strong, wicked fast, kind of a brat, and she fought the bad things. She saved people, helped ‘em out when they needed it. Now, there’s only supposed to be one girl at a time that has all of these wicked super powers. She’s called a slayer. And a long, long, long time ago.” She’s glaring at me now. “In the town that Mommy and me used to live in, there was this wicked bad thing that was hurting all of these girls. And your mommy had aunt Willow use her magic.” He knows magic is real, we were just trying to shield him from the bad stuff. “And she made it so that a lot of girls became slayers. And when your mommy and me made you the powers went into you when you were in your mommy’s belly. That’s why you can run so fast and can hear things that are far away and why you can tell when someone is one of those bad things.”


There, I don’t think I did too bad of job, do you? I have no fucking clue. His expression is blank as he thinks about what I told him. Buffy is still glaring at me for drawing out the ‘longs’ and I know I’m going to get an ear full later on. That’s ok, I have my ways of making her feel young again. What? Don’t look at me like that. I have a strong sexual appetite, that’s just healthy. Anyway, he looks over at Buffy and then up at me. I give him a small smile but he doesn’t return it. He holds is hand up to his forehead and closes his eyes like he has a headache or something. Ok so maybe I went a little too far, I don’t know. I’ve never done this before I don’t know what to tell him. If he were older then it would be different, but he’s still really young, his mind is very fragile and we have to be careful about what we tell him.


“I need ta go lay down.” He slides off of my lap and leaves the room. Did I really just drive my kid to actually want to take nap? Wow, this is bad. I get up and walk out of the room. I need to make sure I didn’t over do it with the story. I thought that it might help, was it really that bad? I hope not. I don’t want to be the reason he needs therapy when he’s older. I walk into his bedroom and he’s lying down on his bed. He’s shoes are in the middle of the room along with his socks, and he’s staring up at the ceiling. Please don’t tell me he’s having a mental break down or something. Did I break my boy? I sit down on the edge of the bed and run my fingers through his hair. We need to get it cut, it’s getting kind of long.


“Mattie, are you ok? Did the story scare you?” He shakes his head no but he doesn’t look at me. This is going to take a little more then I thought. “What’s the matter?” He looks over at me, there’s worry in his eyes and it’s starting to freak me out. He sits up and crawls into my lap. I wrap my arms around him and he rests his head on my chest. Now this is really starting to freak me out. “Mattie, please tell me. What’s wrong?” He sighs and starts to toy with the tape I have wrapped around my hands. I forgot I put that on. I’m just about to go crazy when he finally speaks.


“Mommy said a vampire can only come inna house if someone says they can come in. And Mommy let that ugly vampire in the house and now he can hurt us.” I knew deep down that somehow this was going to be Buffy’s fault. Ok, I didn’t but still, she shouldn’t have let Spike in our house in the first place and it turns out that her letting that stupid fuck in is the reason our boy is so upset. Sometimes I really just wanna give her a good smack to the back of her head, try to knock some sense into her.


“No, he can’t. Willow used her magic so he can’t come in anymore. He’s not going to hurt you or Mommy or me. And if he tries then I’ll slay him. Because that’s what slayers do, we slay vampires.” He turns around in my arms so he’s looking up at me. He has this curious look on his face and I think I know what he’s going to ask. “When you stick the pointy end of the wood into a vampire’s heart they turn to dust and they just blow away.” And stick to you if you’re sweaty, that sucks so much you have no idea. “But you have to be very careful because they have sharp teeth and they’re strong, and if they can they’ll bite a person’s neck and hurt them really, really bad.” He nods his head a couple of times and then crawls back onto the bed. He doesn’t really take naps anymore but I think he’s all tuckered out.


“Mama, you said that Angel is a good guy, but he made the creepy feeling happen too.” I was wondering when he was going to ask about Angel. Oh boy, is this going to be hard to explain or what? Alright, let’s just stay calm and think about this for a second. How do you explain the concept of a soul to a five-year-old? Hmm...Well, I’m still at a loss, but I could at least give it a try. Maybe he’ll give up this little questioning thing that he’s doing and just accept whatever I have to say as a reasonable answer and then I can go and spar with Buffy. That was going to be part of the training. I was going to spar with her, sort of, and have him try out the same moves on her. Well, not the exact same moves because he’s so small, but we would have figured something out.


“Angel is the only good vampire in the whole world. He has a soul, and a soul helps make him good.” I know for a fact that just because you have a soul it doesn’t mean that you’re good, and I’m not going to lie about something like that. “But just because he’s good doesn’t mean he can come in the house. You never, ever, ever let a vampire come in the house, ok?” He nods his head and then rests his head down on the pillow. I lean forward and leave a little kiss on his forehead, which he wipes away. That was sort of cute in the beginning, now it’s just annoying. I stand up and turn around and Buffy is standing in the doorway, smiling a little smile. I walk out of the room, staying right in front of her so she has to back up and I reach behind me and close the door. I keep walking until she’s pressed up against the wall.


“I think you handled that very well, don’t you?” she asks as I start to kiss and suck on her neck. She arches more into me and tilts her head off to the side to give me better access. She moans a little bit and starts to run her hands up and down my back. “I think you’ve been hanging around vampires too long.” I chuckle a little against her skin. I didn’t think it’s funny, just a little ironic, well maybe, I’m not sure. She’s dated a vampire and roughly fucked another, and she thinks I hang out with vampires too much? I don’t even hang out with them, I fight them until I get a clear shot and then I stake them. She reaches up with one hand and cups my cheek and gently pushes my face away. What the hell?


“We can’t right now, baby, Willow’s coming over. She’ll be here in like five minutes. I’m gonna talk to her about finding that spell.” I try to make my eyes stay their normal size. I know we’ve been talking about having another baby, and we’ve been toying with the idea of a pregnant me but I don’t think I’m ready yet. “Don’t worry, I’m only asking her to find it. I’m not going to ask her to cast it until we’re both absolutely ready for this. I would never pressure you into something like that.” She leans in and places a small kiss on my lips. It quickly grows in passion and I’m kissing her neck again and Red chooses that moment to knock on the door. I growl and Buffy laughs as she gently pushes me off of her and leaves to answer the door. Sometimes I think Red lives only to annoy me.


BPOV


I let Willow in and we exchange hellos and then sit down on the couch. Matthew walks out of his bedroom and gives her a big hug. Faith and I haven’t been talking about having a baby while Matthew is around because we don’t want to get his hopes up. I tell him to go see what his mama is doing because me and ‘aunt Willow’ have some important grown up stuff we need to talk about. He hops off of the couch and goes in search for her. I hear Faith go into the training room and roll my eyes a little bit. She and Willow only tolerate each other, they don’t get along, they don’t hang out, they don’t spend more then five minutes in the same room unless they have to. They just don’t get along. It doesn’t have anything to do with the bad stuff that happened in Sunnydale, it’s simply a case of two personalities that don’t mesh well. I would like Faith to be here for the conversation but I’m not going to force her.


“So, how are things with you and Kennedy?” I ask, I don’t want to seem like the only reason we hang out is because of her magic. She gives me this funny look because she knows I didn’t have her come all the way over here to talk about Kennedy. But she says that everything is fine. They still have some issues to work out but they’re doing better and hopefully everything will go back to normal. Then she asks me what’s up and why I’m acting a little nervous. I sigh a couple of times because I know that I shouldn’t be getting my hopes up. I would love another baby but if she can’t find the spell then we won’t be able to have our own, there’s always adoption or artificial insemination but it just wouldn’t be the same. “Did you ever find that spell that was used to create Matthew?” She shakes her head no and then waits for me to speak. She can tell that I’m sort of struggling and I’m glad she’s letting me think this out a little before asking me questions. I look down at my nails, suddenly they’re very interesting. “Faith and I are thinking about having another baby.” I look up at her shyly and she has this huge smile on her face. Why was I so worried that she would react badly to that?


“Buffy, that’s great.” She leans over and gives me a big hug. I hug her back and after a couple of seconds we pull away. “I was wondering when you two were going to have another. I mean, you guys are so great with Matt and he’s doing great, adjusted and all that stuff. But Buffy, using that spell isn’t the only way to have another. I don’t mean to brag or anything, but ever since I did that ‘calling the potentials’ spell back in Sunnydale I can pretty much do whatever I want now. I couldn’t figure out exactly what spell was used but I know what it did to change you. All I have to do is work a little magic and you’re good to go. I can even set it so that the spell won’t wear off until she is pregnant. I’ll have to come up with some sort of signal, like I can turn her hair blue and it won’t go back to normal until it works.” We laugh and then I smile wide and hug her again. I wanna run off and tell Faith but she’s with Matthew right now and I don’t want him to ask a bunch of questions that I won’t be able to answer. Better to hide the excitement then hint that something is going on. Just because Faith said she’s willing to talk about it that doesn’t mean she wants to do this. I really want to but I’m not going to pressure her into having a baby.


“So, have you two come to any decisions?” I don’t really know how to answer that question. No we haven’t really but we sort of have. We both want a baby we just don’t know for sure if we want to have another. There are so many things to consider. I open my mouth to say something but then close it and get up off of the couch to answer the door after someone rings the doorbell. I’m not expecting anyone else to come over. Who could possibly be showing up at my house at one in the afternoon? I open the door and Matthew comes running out of the training room to see who’s at the door. He stands by my legs as I look on in surprise and some shock. Why is she here? I’m not mad or anything just stunned. Why is she here?


“Well hello to you too. Mind if I come in?” Still in a bit of a daze I shake my head no and back away to make room. Matthew looks up at her and I can tell that she’s going to be a big hit. Matthew is a big flirt with the ladies, Faith couldn’t be prouder. It is cute to watch but sometimes it’s annoying, that’s why we leave him over at Willow and Kennedy’s on Thursdays so we can get the grocery shopping done, otherwise we’d spend half the time trying to find him because he sneaks off when we’re not paying attention. And he’ll find some pretty woman and follow her around and talk to her. I hate that he doesn’t have a fear of strangers. Everywhere we go I’m afraid he’s going to sneak off and talk to the wrong person. And he’s just so quiet when we go places and he has that slayer stealthiness, which makes it even harder to keep track of him. Anyway, I close the door and we walk into the living room. She exchanges hellos with Willow and then it’s quiet for a couple of seconds.


“Hi Cordelia, how are you doing? And not to sound rude or anything but what are you doing here?” She looks at me like my question was just so offensive. She sits down on the couch and looks around a little bit. She’s taking her time. Cordelia follows no schedule but her own. As much as I hate her for it because it’s irritating, it’s also something to admire. She doesn’t let people push her around, never has, never will.


“What, I can’t use my vacation time to catch up with old...acquaintances?” I shrug my shoulders, good enough answer for me. But why would she want to come here? She could have gone to Mexico or something for her vacation. She’s always talking about wanting to travel to other countries and she comes up here to Shasta Lake instead. Something is seriously wrong with her. She sees Matthew standing at my legs hiding behind me a little. Ok more then a little. His body is behind mine and he’s peeking his head out around my thigh. I look down and he has this little blush on his face. Oh yeah, Cordelia is going to be a big hit with him. He’s already smitten, I won’t be hearing anything out of his mouth but things about Cordelia for the next two days. She leans forward in her seat and holds out her hand. “You must be Matthew, I’m Cordelia, but you can call me Cordy, handsome.” And she’s pretending to flirt with him, this is going to be just so great. That’s supposed to be sarcastic by the way. He just hides his face behind me. He’s getting too tall to do this, his face is like right in my ass now. I step to the side so he’s expose to her and she smiles wider.


“Matthew, don’t be rude, say hello.” He looks up at me like ‘how could you just leave me here?’ it’s cute. He looks down at his feet and then he slowly reaches out and barely touches her hand. Then he pulls it back and stuffs it in his pocket. I can see him blushing profusely. If he’s not careful a vessel might pop. I sit down on the smaller couch that’s against the wall. Matthew hops up on the couch and sits next to Willow. I roll my eyes and lean back against the couch, getting comfortable. “So, Cordelia, we haven’t talked to you in like, three years, and that was a business call. What’s been going on in the life of the Queen C?” She glares at me for calling her that. I know she’s changed, sort of. She’s still blunt and a little rude, but she really does care about people and what happens to them.


“Not much actually. Work keeps me pretty busy what with all the apocalypses and demon attacks and stuff. I went to a Three Days Grace concert about a month ago. That was really fun. Met a guy there named Mike. We dated for a while, then he tried to cut out my heart to use it in some ritual to bring hell to earth so of course I had to dump him. Things got pretty crazy for a while at Wolfram and Hart when we had this big outbreak of insanity. Some pissed off client thought he’d get back at us for losing his case by poisoning the water coolers with some type of potion. Uh, it was horrible. But not much else is going on. What about you guys?” I look over at Willow and we look at each other with a questioning look. Not much has happened. Well, nothing out of the normal. We shrug and Willow starts to run her fingers through Matthew’s hair. It’s getting kind of long, we better get it cut.


“Nothing special. Matthew started school not too long ago.” She smiles and looks over at him. He’s blushing again, it’s too cute. I really wish I had a camera. He hides in face in Willow’s side and she wraps her arm around him and gives him a little squeeze. “Not much else is going on. Slaying is good, pretty quiet around here. There are vampires they just don’t like to attack people a lot. It’s weird. It’s like they only feed when they have to and not when they want to. I don’t know, maybe the hellmouth made them more violent? Who knows? Oh, I killed this huge demon that was making Faith crazy.” Oh crap. Probably not something I should say in front of Matthew. He isn’t paying attention though. He’s too busy looking at Cordelia. Even at thirty...something, she still has all the boys looking at her. I look up when Faith comes out of the training room. She’s in nothing more then a pair of shorts and a sports bra and she’s all sweaty, a sight that has never failed to get me a little turned on. But we have guests, it’s not like I can just jump her right there. She sits down next to me and our arms touch and I pull away a little and she looks at me funny. I reach over and wipe the sweat that got on my arm onto her shorts. “Faith, that’s gross, go get a shower, get all that nasty sweat off of you.” She can tell I’m only being half-serious.


“You didn’t think it was nasty last night.” I blush and look over at Willow and Cordelia. Willow’s trying her best not to smile and Cordelia just rolls her eyes. At least she’s not uncomfortable around us. I actually thought that she might have a bit of a problem with my sexuality because she’s...ya know...Cordelia, but she doesn’t seem to mind. I guess that’s one of the very few good things about her, she looks passed race and your sexual orientation and makes fun of you for the person you really are. “So Queenie, what brings you all the way up from L.A.?” I can’t help but notice the tone of voice that Faith is using, and I don’t like it one bit. It’s her ‘you’re looking nice today, what are you wearing under that top?’ She’s only supposed to use that voice on me. Cordelia seems to pick up on it because she shifts in her seat and stars eyeing Faith a little suspiciously. Faith just smiles at her. Hey! That’s my ‘I could eat you right here’ smile! I’m gonna have to get Cordelia to leave because I really don’t want to yell at Faith in front of her.


“I have tons of vacation time so I’d thought I’d come up and see the old gang. So Faith, how are you, good?” Faith just shrugs her shoulders. She can feel that I’m uncomfortable with her being so...friendly with Cordelia so she’s acting like she doesn’t care. “Well, that’s great. Good to see you two are still the happy couple. At least you’re not sickening like before.” I roll my eyes and Willow laughs a little. I send her a little glare and she shuts up. I see Matthew slowly crawling into Willow’s lap. If Cordelia stays long enough then soon he’s going to place himself in between her and Willow. I think it’s cute how he’s being shy, he’s never really like that. I think the only other person he’s been shy with is the neighbor that moved in about a month ago. She looks a lot like Cordelia, except her skin isn’t as tan.


We talk for a little while longer. Cordelia fills us in on all the gossip that she thinks we actually care about. Some of it is pretty funny, but the rest I’m sure she’s saying because she likes to hear herself speak. Faith leaves after awhile. She whispered into my ear that she either had to leave or she was going to strangle Cordelia. I smile and give her a little kiss on the cheek. She gets up and picks up Matthew off of Willow’s lap and then walks into the training room. It’s then that things take on a very interesting twist. So, ok, more stunning then interesting, but I guess to you it’s going to be interesting...maybe.


“So, how far along is Faith?” I look at her a little weird. How far along is Faith with what? I look over at Willow with this look that says ‘help, what is she talking about?’ Cordelia looks at me then Willow, going back and forth a couple of times like she’s watching a tennis match or something. I look over at her, and I’m about to ask her what the hell she’s talking about but I don’t have to. “Isn’t she pregnant? I got a vision on the drive up here. I saw her in a delivery room, you at her side, she was cussing up a storm, words even I haven’t heard. She gives birth to a healthy baby, then she passes out. The vision ended before they said the sex, but they did say it looked healthy. So I thought it was safe to assume that she’s pregnant, I guess I was wrong.” So, I guess we are going to have another baby after all. She sticks around for a few more minutes but then leaves because she wants to get back to her hotel room to rest. I walk her to the door and then sit down on the couch next to Willow.


“I guess Faith is going to agree to carry the baby after all,” she says and I can’t help but smile at the thought of a pregnant Faith. Us lying in bed together and me and stroking her growing belly. Feeling it kick for the first time and seeing the look on her face when it does. I think I’ll even like hearing her complain about her sore breasts and upset stomach. I know she’ll rant on and on about gaining weight. She’s going to rant and bitch about not being able to patrol or do any vigorous training, and it’s going to be cute, and then probably annoying. But I’m going to love all of it. “Well, I’ll be off. I’m sure you two have a lot to talk about now.” We hug and then she leaves.


I go into the kitchen and make lunch. Ok, so I don’t really make anything so much as heating some stuff up in the microwave, but I will learn how to cook. Mark my words, one of these days I’ll learn to cook. So the two loves of my life smell the food all the way in the training room and walk into the kitchen and act like they haven’t eaten in days. Afterwards Faith gives Matthew a bath and then she takes a shower. We’re being kind of lazy today because we don’t really feel like going anywhere. We sit around and watch some television. Matthew goes into his bedroom and brings out some of the books that I bought him. He sits on the couch in between Faith and me and we take turns reading to him. He loves it when we read to him, especially when Faith does because she gets really enthusiastic and melodramatic about it. It’s really fun to watch.


The rest of the day is pretty relaxing. We eat dinner, then go out to the backyard and toss the tennis ball around for Tucker. Matthew’s starting to experiment a little with is strength. We have a large backyard so we don’t have to worry about the ball going over the fence and breaking a neighbor’s window or anything like that. He did put a dent in one of the boards to the fence though. Faith sits down on the steps and I sit down next to her. I rest my head on her shoulder and she wraps her arm around my lower back. We watch our boy as he runs around on the grass and the dog playfully chases after him. I start to gently kiss and nuzzle her neck. Usually we aren’t this affectionate in front of Matthew, it’s sort of rare that he sees us kiss and act all coupley and when he does he teases us about it, and I have no doubt in my mind that it’s all Dawn’s fault. I gently run the tip of my tongue along the little hickie that I left on her neck. She gives out a little moan and shudder. Unfortunately Matthew hears it too and he turns around and sees me sucking on Faith’s neck.


“Eww. Tucker look, that’s gross.” He giggles and then starts to run around the backyard again. Maybe if we start ignoring him when he does that he’ll stop teasing us? I don’t know. It’s getting dark now and the porch lights automatically come on. They have these cool motion sensors so if we’re outside they’ll stay on until we go back into the house. I nibble on Faith’s earlobe a little bit and I feel her tense up. Since I’m not paying attention it takes a few seconds longer for me to feel it, but I do feel it nonetheless. I look up and scan the yard. Matthew and Faith are doing the same, even Tucker has tensed up and is looking around. He starts to bark and slowly steps towards the direction where the vampire is. Matthew starts to back up towards us and when he’s close enough Faith and I grab onto him and pull him towards us. We push him behind us and then we stand up. Faith calls the dog back and then puts both Tucker and Matthew in the house. The vampire still hasn’t made him or herself known but I know that it’s either Angel or Spike. No one else would be stupid enough to come here. And then Angel walks out of the shadows. I hate how he hides like that. He walks up to us and we both relax. Faith is still a little tense but not as much.


“Just thought I’d let you know that Spike left town. I don’t know where he went but it’s nowhere near here. If he ever comes back and you don’t want to deal with him just give me a call and I’ll send a team up. I’m heading back to L.A. now, so I’ll see you at the next apocalypse.” I smile and he even cracks a small grin even though we both know that he’s serious. If one year, just one could go by without an attempted apocalypse I’d probably be the happiest person in the world. Before we can say anything to him he’s gone. I turn to Faith and give her a small kiss on the lips. She pulls back and smiles at me. I kiss her again very lightly and I don’t let her deepen it when she tries. I start to tease her a little bit. I kiss her on the lips but whenever she tries to kiss me back I pull away.


“You little fox,” she says with laughter in her voice. I laugh out loud as she puts her hands on the back of my head and then pulls me down into a searing kiss. We pull back and I step closer to her so our bodies are touching completely. “So, did Red have good news?” I smile really wide when I remember what Willow told me earlier today. She smiles too and I lean in and kiss her again. She cuts it short, I guess she would rather talk then kiss me, who knew? “So I take it she found the smell? We can have another?” I furrow my brows and roll my eyes back as if I’m thinking about it. She laughs a little because she knows I’m just joking around.


“She didn’t exactly find the spell. She said that she knows what the spell changed in us so all she has to do is work a little magic herself and we’re good to go. She said that she’ll come with some sort of signal so we’ll know when the spell works and then whatever changed inside us will go back to normal, except one of us will be pregnant.” She smiles really wide and then pulls my lips to hers. Our tongues entwine together and her fingers are gently massaging my scalp. I could kiss her all night. We jump apart when we hear something smash against the kitchen floor. I roll my eyes and she laughs a little. We walk into the house hand in hand and as we’re walking down the hall I see Matthew rushing from one end of the kitchen to the other. I step forward and see that he’s trying to clean up something glass that had broken and smashed into twenty or so pieces. He sees us watching and he drops what he’s holding and rushes passed us and runs towards his bedroom.


“Tucker did it!” he yells and then slams his bedroom door closed. I roll my eyes and start to clean up the glass. One of my brand new glasses, they were really expensive. I bought them because Christmas is going to be coming up pretty soon and I wanted to have some nice Christmas glasses for when we host our annual Christmas party. We invite the scoobies and the neighbors and so far no demons or vampires have attacked. It’s always a really nice get together. It’s where Xander met his wife. Am I good or what? I guess I’ll have to lock up all of the nice glasses in a higher cupboard if I want to have any good Christmas glasses for the Christmas party.


I already have Faith’s Christmas presents. I have them hidden over at Xander’s house because she’ll never think to look there. I got her this really cool gold cross necklace that has some diamonds on the tips of it. I also bought a new T.V. since ours is kind of small and she had to get rid of the big screen so we could remake her game room into a bedroom. She almost cried when the guy from the store came and picked it up. So I got her the necklace and the T.V., anything else? I can’t remember...damn. I better go over to Xander’s sometime really soon so I can look. We already Matthew some stuff. A bike because a boy should learn how to ride a bike, all kids should learn, not just boys. We got him some new army action figures because he’s always losing them. And then the normal boy stuff, toy guns and stuff like that. Yep, this year Christmas should be pretty great, especially if Faith is pregnant.