The Forget Me Not Series

Title: Forget-Me-Not Part 6 "No Myth"

"We said goodbye before hello. My secrets she will never know...What if I were
Romeo in black jeans? What if I was Heathcliff ,-it's no myth. Maybe she's just

looking for someone to dance with." ~ Michael Penn

Forget-Me-Not- Part 6 "No Myth"

_________________________________________________________________________________________________

"Okay.... Now," Angel said to the solders as he absent-mindedly clapped his
hands in front of him. He looked up at Gunn and Connor arriving and then quickly

looked away. "Gunn is here...Mr. Gunn, as usual take all fighting orders from
him....We have an advantage over these people. Most of them are here to kill
strictly

because they've been paid. There hearts aren't in it, where as you all have been
with us for a long time and believe in the mission."

He wasn't as cocky as Connor remembered. Angel sort of reminded him of his camp
counselor. The one that he HATED because he was Mr. "Horary for

Everything." These fighters WERE being paid to fight by Angel. Connor would
never take any money. He was here to help Spike and Faith, because some moronic

demon clan had them mixed up with Angel and that other Slayer. They thought that
Spike was going to sleep with Faith and lose his soul, and then suck the world

into Hell. Spike would never do anything like that. Connor read Spike's file at
Wolfram. Spike may sleep with a Slayer, but who wouldn't? And he didn't lose his

soul when he did it.

Angel had actually offered Connor money after Connor had to practically fight
Angel to come to this fight! It made Connor's blood pump with anger, but it was
a

good clean familiar feeling, that made sense. Finally, things made sense. When
he was just Brian he wondered where all this anger came from. He knew it wasn't

from being made fun of in Junior High.

The people were looking somewhere else now and so was Angel. They focused on
three figures that were strolling up. The two walked identically and causally
with

their hands in their black denim pockets. The third walked behind them just
close enough to be with them. That figure was taller and wider and somehow
didn't seem

as comfortable in its own skin. That was the first time Connor noticed Wesley
was there too. He had been standing beside Angel all along, but the air around
the guy

seemed to shift in a way that made you pay attention. His annoyance was
palpable. Connor smiled.

"Would you shut-up, boy" Spike smirked at the taller guy.

The guy didn't really look like a boy to Connor. Spike had called Connor "boy"
too. Was there some kind of similarity between this guy and Connor?

"I'm just saying...after I work all day I REALLY REALLY don't need to come home
to dirty bloody dishes, and the fact that I'm saying that literally and not the
way you say it is just on a level of wrongness that I don't want to know
exists!" The guy said. The guy sounded like his mother. Connor hoped that he
didn't sound likethat. (Not that there was anything wrong with his mother. He
loved her.)

"Can you to Newlyweds finish this later? We have people to train...I think I'm
changing my opinion on 'don't ask don't tell' in the army," Faith cackled. She
was so happy and alive, even Angel seemed to smile when she spoke.

"You're late," Wesley said.

He wasn't smiling. Faith wasn't alive thanks to him. Connor didn't like what he
had put Faith through to save Angel. Not to mention the fact that if it weren't
for Wes,Connor never would have went to Quar'toth. Not that he cared that he was
taken away from Angel!

"Yeah...sorry...Hey, everybody...Welcome to Sunny D. I'm Faith,... the vampire
slayer," She nodded and seemed to say "the vampire Slayer" part more quietly
than the rest.

"Thanks for helping us fight for our lives. But, I really don't want any of you
guys going down on the mission....If the tingting gets ruff I want you to fall
back. I'm sure any of the people that they will send after the likes of me an'
Spike will be cut-throat...If anyone's throat is going to be cut, I don't want
it to be yours. I want you to be like reverse secret service agents. Do what you
can for me an' Spike an' our people but if you see any bullets jump out of the
way," she commanded.

She didn't say any of this quietly. He almost felt like saying: "Sir, yes, sir!"
She had got his blood pumping. He wanted to run off and bring her the head of
everything that was trying to hurt her, like he was born for it. He was happy he
had come.

"Wait a second, wait a second now! If these people want to be all throw
themselves to the loins and get their families that sweet life insurance policy
who are we to bloody stop them? Of course there is no sense in taking a bullet
for me, but by all means take them for her and if you feel like taking a good
staking for me I - Ow!"

Spike grumbled as Faith hit him in the side of the head.

"This is Spike the vampire. He survived a very long time, and he's a mastermind
when it comes to fighting. So, show him respect. Accept when he says dumb ass
things like that! This is Harris. Harris has military training and he's the
McGuyver of surviving in these parts. Listen to him...any ideas you have should
go through him first. No one is expected to go down here!" Faith said sternly.

"Let's not get nuts," Wesley said, "We don't need too many head Chefs. Gunn and
Faith will lead you all in battle and we want you to keep your eyes peeled and
report anything back to Angel and me."

"Oh Watcher...you hurt my feelings... I wanted so much to play the part of a
lowly drill sergeant too," Spike chuckled.
nor nor laughed audibly and Spike smiled at him.

"No one is a lowly anything, Spike! Everyone is a valued member of the team
here," Angel explained to everyone as he grimaced.

"Totally, but Spike and Harris have knowledge of Sunny D, and we've dealt with
what these guys have thrown at us before...and Gunn, Gunn's the man. So, you all
do what we say when we say it... and the first thing is I don't want anyone
going down.... Here's a map we got of Sunny D. Harris and Red who you'll meet
later did it for us. It has all these colors and a graph of all the demon
activity that the Rhoshobi brought in, as well as the human assassins we think
they brought in...I think the humans are blue and the demons are purple and then
the serious demons are red," Faith said to them.

"'Cept some of the red is blood I spilt...Dinner really," Spike added.

It reminded Connor of when his mother would tell all the kids something and his
father would quietly add an afterthought. Although, it did make him cringe that
Spike drank blood. For some reason Connor had to remind himself Spike WAS a
vampire. Connor saw his file summary. He had almost been as bad as Angelus, but
not really. No one rivaled Connor's REAL father...and REAL mother.

"It has all different symbols on it for different stuff...and I dunno.. Harris
is here to explain it. Did you want to say something, Harris?" Faith asked the
guy.

"I'm here to explain the map...that not only has blood on it but also smells
like bong water...But, I guess that's a don't ask- don't tell sort of thing.
Sorry, atle tle

military humor...You know because they say that about being gay, not about bong
water...not that anyone is gay, despite Faith's humor- Thank you very
much....Well, actually some of us are gay- But, NOT me..." The guy went on.

Connor really hoped that he didn't seem like that to Spike, or anyone. Even
though the guy was older than Connor, he reminded Connor of what he was like in
his early high school years, or what he had been forced to believe he was like.
An ordinary dork. Women like Cordy and Faith would never want to be with a guy
like that. But, it was better than being a murdering dumb ass he supposed, even
if that was what Cordelia wanted.

All the people began to study the map. It was Gunn who laid it out on the
baseball field bleachers and began talking about patterns of attack. Gunn was
asking the guy questions. The guy did have the answers for them. When Connor had
been an ordinary dork he had been smart too. He didn't feel so smart now for
some reason. Connor stood back where he could still hear which was pretty far
back. Far away from Angel and Wesley. He easily heard foot steps behind him
walking away.

"Where are you going? You should hear this," Wesley demanded to Spike and Faith
as they were leaving.

"Wes, I known Sunny D like I know my man's right hand. Harris has all the info
you need. We'll get the low-down on anything new later...Spike and I have our
own training to do," Faith said.

"We need to be a team, Faith," Wesley grumbled.

"And we will be...There are just things ed ted to work on alone," She said. She
seemed so patient with Wesley aredared to the way she was with everyone
else.Connor would just smack him in the head.

"Alone with him," Wesley stated as he glared at Spike. Connor waited with a
smirk for Spike to have some really good comeback. He di say say anything
though. He didn't even give that "Ha ha...Fuck you!" smile. He lit a cigarette
and seemed far away as he waited.

"That's right... Wes, Spike and I have been trainfor for a year and a half...If
we were gonna do some Angel/ B slap and lose the soul tickle it would have
happened by now. Spike loves B too and she is in a galaxy far far away with
Angel who is human there...So, you can rest easy about that dimension too,
okay?" Faith sighed.

Connor didn't think Spike could lose his soul. He had read how he fought for it.
Gunn was right; you tend to keep what you fought for. Connor wished he had
foughtfor something he got to keep. Maybe now.

"That's not what I'm worried about...The demon and all of that healing nonsense
is that still going on?" He asked her.

"Well, when you ask like that I really get all fuzzy and want to share!...Yeah,
it's still going on! I haven't killed anyone human if that's what your worried
about. We've been trying to control it...Trying to work on bringing it out just
a little and not full blast. It seems to be working, a little," She said.

"Trying to--- That doesn't sound like a very good idea, if you ask me," Wesley
said.

"Well, she didn't ask you, did she, Cowboy?" Spike asked.

There he was. Saying what Connor wished he could say, but Connor didn't fit well
enough to say anything.

"I'm just concerned for you welfare Faith. That's all. It seems like it would be
a good idea to work on restraining the demon entirely...Stop it from coming
out...I mean, that's only logical being the consequences when it does come out.
Even if Spike heals you, you can't afford to be weak now even for a few days,"
Wesleysaid.

"That's sounds great on paper, but when I work on bringing it out I seem to
almost not be dying after. I'm less weak... You know what I think? I think I've
been trying so hard to be a good little Slayer with the self control that the
thing couldn't take it any more and went ballistic...I'm like the Incredible
, wi, wicked!" Faith

smiled.

Connor smiled too. He hadn't seen hern "rn "all demony", as Cordy might say.
But, he was sshe she looked hotter than the Hulk even when she did it.

"That theory sounds as incredible as the Hulk himself, Faith," Wesley scoffed.

"Why don't you share all your 'E equals M C squareds' on what's going on then?
Oh, right I forgot! You and all your rooms of files that you converted to your
palm

pilot and your brain trusts have nothing for us!" Spike spat. Connor laughed.

"He's right...Bring me something hard Wes and I'll go with what you've got. In
the meantime I just have to trust myself," Faith said.

Connor watched them walk away. He supposed he should stay here. He was one of
the fighters. He could feel Angel's eyes darting towards him all too often. What

did he want? Connor looked at Spike and Faith getting smaller as they walked
with identical casualness.

"Bet Watcher-boy wants to bring you something hard... Bet he always did. But, he n't.n't. Never could? Could he?" Spike grumbled to Faith softly.

Connor burst out laughing and Wesley stared at him. He couldn't hear them even
though he was closer.

"I'll kick your ass into next month if you don't shut-up, English!" Faith
grumbled.

"And I'll be waiting to beat you down on Halloween," Spike said, "Hey Blade!
C'mon then ...Since your bein' a little pitcher with big ears."

Spike hadn't raised his voice any to call to Connor. He used the same
conversational tone he was using with Faith. Connor didn't know what he was
talking about as

far as pictures, but Connor knew he had been invited all the same wal walked
quickly to catch up with them. He could feel two eyes watch him go. But, no one
said

anything except for Faith.

"Huh?" She asked Spike and by that time Connor had caught up with them.

"Oh Blade! Angel's son - You're here! I didn't see you come in. You must have
been all stealthy...Hey!" Faith smiled and it was genuine. He would forgive her
calling

him "Angel's son." He'd forgive her convincing him to commit murder, but she had
been the one who stopped him from that. And as much as Connor hated his

father, not killing him had been a good thing.

"Hey, Faith. What's new?" Was all he asked.

"Ah, same ol'. People are messing with me. I have a demon in me," She sighed as
she broke a pad lock off a huge white steal door with one quick rip of her hand.


"I know the feeling," He tried to say lightly as he followed her and Spike into
a huge room where his voice echoed. It was a gym. A huge gym with stadium
seating.

"Welcome to the Thunderdome, Blade," Faith said casually as she turned on the
lights.

"This is where you let your demon out...or something?" he asked.

"Yeah," she laughed, "This is where we train. All kinds of demons get let out
here."

She was laughing at him. Should he know all this already? What did she mean, all
kinds of demons? It made him nervous.

"We sort rent out this lovely space at night...or we barter for it really...We
use there space at night and in return they get to use these," Spike said as he
kicked open

a closet that said "private", which revealed an amount of weapons that Connor
hadn't seen since...since he had only been Connor.

"Holy shit!" he smirked as only the new and improved Connor would
"O
"Of course.... It's a limited bartering system as the kiddies will never find
these weapons for recess," Spike said as he twirled an ax.

"I'd made sure of that! We don't want another Columbine on our hands," Faith
sighed.

"It would be far more interesting than Columbine, Pet. All those Sods had were
guns and bombs," Spike said in a way that made Connor laugh.

Spike was shooting a cross-bow at an already set up archery target that Connor
had just seen.

"How do you know kids won't get into these?" Connor heard himself asking. He had
been thinking about his little Sister, as he figured this was a high school. He
didn't mean to sound nagging.

"Unlike the one I ded oed out of I have friends in this high school. My man is
here. He keeps everything stashed for us. He even sets it up for us too... He
used to train with me, but he's been doing that less and less," She seemed to
realize this as she said it and frowned.

"Ah... You're getting too good the boy doesn't want to get bruised," Spike said.


"Shut-up!" Faith snapped. She didn't do this with humor.

"All I meant was that you are coming into your own as a Slayend Ind I think your
man is smart enough to realize that Slayers often need to train alone," Spike
said

softly.

"Your boyfriend is in high school?" Connor asked. He wasn't exactly sure how old
Faith was, but he could see that happening. A mature cool Senior, why not?

"No!" She cackled now, "He's the principal."

"Oh yeah," Connor rned ned "That's right. I met him... He wouldn't tell me where
you were. It makes sense that guy is a Principal."

Right. That old guy who practically slammed the door in his face when he had
finally found the nerve to drive here and ask for Faith and Spike was Faith's
boyfriend.

Terrific. If Connor had never picked up the demon scent with the intent to start
a brawl he never would have met that nice demon with the Red VW bug, and he
never would have found them. He would have given up. He might have taken that
forgetting pill.

"Come Grass-hopper, you still have so much to learn," Spike said to Faith.

"Well, I'm sure that you guys have really important stuff to do...I didn't
mean..." Connor's voice trailed off. He was sure that they had some serious
formal training

regiment going on, and Connor didn't need to be crashing it.

"So, how about something from the 'Gia' soundtrack? Some classic oldies... You
like oldies, Blade?" She was asking him something as she sat open legged on a
pile of mats as she waved a CD in front of him that was obviously home-burned.

She didn't wait for him to answer, not that he knew what she was really asking.
She put the CD in: "**On the floor of Tokyo....Or downLondLondon town to go, go.

With the record selection, With the mirror reflection...I'm dancing with..**"

"Again! You know there is no soundtrack to that bloody movie," Spike grumbled
over the music as he made the punching bag swing like a skate-border on a ramp.

"I know K and I burned all the songs in the movie. I Have THIS song in my fried
brain..." Faith said as she danced over to the punching bag that Spike swung.

"I know..." she said as she kicked the punching bag back to him.

"It's because of YOU. Yeah you! Fighting on the roof top with all those demons
with the lightning," She laughed. Spike had blocked the punching bag that had
came

at his head with a grunt. He had on a real bitter expression. Connor was almost
afraid he was going to hurl the punching bag at Faith's head.

"God Damned bloody bastard! Stealing MY bloody look. I should of killed him when
I had the chance...He did nn' gn' good after he left 'Gen X'... and Billy boy

never had to fight any bloody demons that also had electro power. Maybe he took
on a vamp or twon hen he was too drunk to know better but...that boy's nothin'

but a thief," Spike grumbled and HE did push the punching bag back at her.

"And apparently he stole your sneer too...shoulda had it copy righted," She
smiled. She had ducked under the punching bag and tackled Spike.

"Billy Idol's a vampire?" Connor asked.

"No. Cirsto Demon. They have souls, but that bastard liked to hang with the
soulless. Must come from being in the music business," Spike said.

Connor realized it was stupid to wince when Spike hurled a punching bag at the
vampire Slayer. He did remember how strong she was, but she was so tiny.

"**Oh dancing with myself...Oh dancing with myself. Well there's nothing to
lose. And there's nothing to prove. I'll be dancing with myself...**"

"I didn't think he looked any older in 'The Wedding Singer.' Anyway, it's not
the worst thing...looking like him on that rooftop after winning a huge battle.
That video

was one of my few positive childhood memories associated with sex," Faith said.

"Me being my usual athletic Rock star self wasn't what I remember most about
last night, Firecracker," Spike said.

No longer sneering or struggling to be let up from under Faith.

"Well, yeah... I mean there was the whole demon coming out to wipe out the rest
of those dudes that almost killed my boyfriend and you healing me, and my
boyfriend sulking about it... But, that is getting to be so played out...More
than this song," She said.

"It really is," Spike sighed, "Wasn't talking about that either...Didn't want to
talk about this in front of the boy...Didn't want to spring this on you in front
of anyone, but you brought it up and I have to take the opportunity."

**"If I looked all over the world. And there's every type of girl. But your
empty eyes Seem to pass me by. Leave me dancing with myself...**"

Connor didn't know what he was talking about. But, he knew Spike didn't want him
here. He knew he should leave.

"What are you talking about, English? Don't you go getting all cryptic on me
too, like all the things trying to kill us. 'The derivation is at hand. The
beginning of the end...The Slayest bst be stopped from joining with the
vampire!' Why can't thust ust tell them to say 'Promise not to fuck the dead guy
and we won't kill you.' Do you think B would have listened if they got it right
and-"

"'S' not what I'm talking about, Baby. Fighting is like dancing. We dance to
live. Sometimes we dance to die. Dying is like dancing. I should know. I tapped
danced out of it more times than I can bloody count," Spike said sadly.

"Wait. Don't tell me! I think I know where this is from. 'Hotel California',
right?" she laughed in an uncomfortable way.

Connor turned to leave. Maybe they WERE secretly doing it. Maybe it would knock
out another fucked-up unwanted kid. Connor remembered how EVERYONE was so fucked
up around here, with their cheating and their ulterior motives. Why should Spike
and Faith be any different?

"Stay put, Boy...You might as well see the scary part now. Besides, I may need
your help afterward. But, first let's get our permission slip signed," Spike
yelled to

him. Connor turned and looked at him bemused.

"Tell me honestly, Baby, you mind if the boy sees you go ape-shit? I mean really
full on beast screaming blood ape-shit?" he asked Faith softly.

"Umm...We're fighting an invasion here, E. The kid might have to see me dead.
So, whatever you think is gonna help him out...What I do mind is this 'Baby'
shit that's coming out of left-field," She said. Faith couldn't die! He wouldn't
let her.

"'K," Spike sighed and closed his eyes and ran his hand through his hair that
was less slicked back and more spikey than usual. He did look like Billy Idol.
He sat up and the Slayer backed off of him and sat beside him.

"Like I said, kids...Fighting, living, dying, it's all in the steps you take.
I'm thinking you both learned the dance way earlier in life than ol' Spike ever
had to..."

"If you are gonna start teaching us ballet for dexterity, like they do in the
NFL, I am outta here, Buddy!" Falauglaughed.

"...But, Spike has been around a long, long, sodding, long time..." he
continued.

"I'll also walk if you keep up the third person talk," Faith threatened lightly.
Holtz or Angel would never tolerate so much back-talk in training, or music.

"I was a hunter, mostly of pretty young things that lived on the street, like
you two," Spike continued. Connor's lips narrowed and his gray eyes widened as
he stepped closer to them.

"Scary, scary, vampire. William the Bloody railroad Spike...Tell me something I
don't know, English," Faith continued too.

"What gets a lot of kiddies...Slayers, Super-kids, and those of the red-blooded
variety alike is that somewhere along the line they learn a step that helped
them out in a particular situation. They probably were in this situation night
after bloody night with some FUCKING SOD, so they learned this step all to
well," Spike was agitated with his own words.

He bounded up andned ned around. Faith got up too, but she didn't say anything.
She just stood there as Spike turned back around.

"**So let's sink another drink. Cause it'll give me time to think. If I had the
chance 'd ask the world to dance...And I'll be dancing with myself**"

"They learned a step too well probably when they were too weak to fight...It's
engrained in them, and they'll just do ilikelike a...like a bloody trigger..."
he scowled.

"What are we playing at here, E?" Faith demanded now.

"With a trigger, your worst enemy is yourself. They have you so scared...Not so
much of them, but of yourself and what a Sod you were for letting it all come
down on you like that...So you can't fight it. You can't even bloody move. So
brassed off, so scared. They have you 'dancing with yourself' to steal from the
Vital sod for a change," he said. He looked really angry at someone.

"This is bullshit! I'm so outta here. You should have warned me that you take a
pretentious asshole pill when Blade comes to town. It's worse than your annoying
asshole pill that I knew was coming with Angel!" Faith was angry at him.

"It's your funeral. I've seen some Slayers go down, and from what I saw last
night you could have the demon, me and God on your side, but you still will go
down,Faith," He growled. Literally that is.

"Hey, Spike," Connor warned lightly. Connor remembered he still had never seen
his vampire face yet. Somehow the growling still hadn't proved it. Still he
shouldn't have growat Fat Faith just because she was calling him an asshole.

"**Dancing with myself. Dancing with myself. Dancing with myself. Dancing with
myself...**"

"One of our little demon friends. He got his hands around your throat. He didn't
even have time to squeeze and you froze up. No demon, no fists, no nothing. You
could have beat him off so easily, but you were---"

"A deer in fucking head lights, I know! I fucked up all right!" She yelled.

"Not a deer...a bloody possum playing dead. Waiting for him to go away. That was
the step you learned too early, and it worked then...But, it's not going to work
now. They'll take all of you-these monsters-they won't just take little pieces
and let you go when they're done-"

"FUCK YOU!" she screamed and hit him. Really hard. Connor could feel the
vibration of it.

"There you goght!ght! We are the monsters it's okay to kill, Faith. It's not
wrong to let it go on me. I really don't think it would be such a bad thing to
let it go on him, but they say I'm not the right blo-" Spike was interrupted by
getting hit by Faith again.

"You don't know what the fuck your talking about!!" She screamed. It hurt
Connor's ears.

"No, I really don't. I know of torture but, I really can't imagine...but, I'm a
vampire that would know enough of how to end you!" Spike had began quietly but
ended up yelling at her.

He had his arms around he neck now.

"Stop it...Stop it... Fuckin' stop it, I said...just hit me. Hit me!"

She had froze and was up against the wall even though Spike wasn't holding her
there. She was breathing hard, like someone had been chasing her forever. Connor
knew that feeling. His own heart raced. He hated whatever this was. He was
starting to hate Spike. He didn't hit her or anything. He just held her up as
she tried to sink to the floor. Connor hated him. He WAS just like Holtz or
Angel-messing with her head.

Connor had been running to jump on Spike to kill his vampire ass when Connor
felt a hand grab him by the back of the shirt. Connor was shocked when he wasn't
able to get away by the sheer force of his speed, when he actually tried to
twist to get away. The only one who could do that was...

"Angel!" Connor growled, "Let me go...You're the one who hates him! He's hurting
her."

"No, he's not," Angel said softly. He thought this was the one place that would
make sense!

"YOU hit me!" Spike commanded to Faith.

"I can't!" she screamed.

"Why?" he demanded.

"Because...because...you'll squeeze!" She said shrilly.

"That's not why...You could take that," he said in a whisand and Connor let out
a breath in relief thinking whatever this was ending.

"You think whatever happened before was bad? Someone who isn't half as strong as
you could sneak up on you like this and do something you WON'T be able to walk
away from...C'mon, bitch! Or is it that you want this?" Spike demanded suddenly
with a roar.

"It's okay, son," Angel said. Connor could hear his shirt tear as if HE was the
incredible Hulk and becoming livid at Angel's condescending tone. But, his shirt
was just tearing as he pulled away from Angel. But, Angel grabbed his arms.
Connor couldn't save Faith and it was all Angel's fault.

"I HATE YOU!" Faith screamed as she had somehow gotten Spike's hand off her
throat. It was so fierce. It made Connor freeze a second as he had been
struggling against Angel. He wondered if she had turned demon for a second.

"Oh yeah? I don't believe you. Show me," He said. She screamed and flipped himver.ver.

"You have no fucking idea who you fucked with! What I can do to you now! What I
would do to you if I saw you!" She yelled. What? If she saw him? Connor didn't
get it. Spike was right there. Just like Angel was right there and Connor just
wanted to kick his ass.

"Is that all you got?" Spike asked.actuactually looked like that was enough.
Spike was bleeding more than Connor had saw someone bleed in a while. Connor was
getting scared in a new direction as Faith kept hitting him.

"She's gonna kill him! Is this what you wanted?" Connor demanded as Angel still
held him back. Things here were always so confusing, like a badly written
tragedy with all these double fake-outs.

"No! You were right about me...I'm dirty and evil. I can kill you! I can kill
everyone that hurt me...untilre'sre's no one left! Nothing, but dirty
disgusting...nothing!"

Now she was crying. The Slayer was crying and Connor never felt so scared.

She had stopped hitting him and she was on the floor with him he had his arms
rapped around her and it looked like he was crying, but that was just blood
running down his face. It had to be. Connor really wished he was home in
Sacramento, but it was better to be here than to be in Sacramento and feel this
way and have no idea why. That's when he had been the real clueless freak. He
never understood why he felt so empty when he thought he had it all. His r
r
life was haunting him and he didn't even know it. That was how Faith must have
felt.

"Why? Why did you make me do that?" She sobbed to him.

"I'm sorry, Baby...But, look you're still here," He said.

"Again with the 'Baby,'" She said as she tried to make her voice sound norma
"
"You're almost not here I could have killed you," She cried again.

"But, you didn't.... You didn't have to go all limp. You let your anger go and
you had enough control over it to not kill me...or you," he said.

She got up red-eyed and laughing and turned towards Connor and Angel.

"Angel always crashes all my homicidal rages...Hi, Angel," She smiled so broadly
and genuinely at Angel it made Connor look away.

"It's only fair. You came to the homicidal rage I threw a few years ago... Hi,
Faith," Angel said. Was that supposed to be funny? Apparently Faith thought it
was.

"It wasn't a homicidal rage. Think about what coulcould do if you could tap into
that anger whenever you wanted it, Love, What's the worst that could happen?"

Spike said... Anger is a gift. He got up from the floor slowly.

"I could go crazy and start killing people again?" She asked.

"Not if you learn to control it," Angel said. What did he know about any of
this? Connor expected Spike to tell Angel to butt out, but he didn't.

"And you all saw how well that went...I was very Zen...in the clobbering of bes best friend...Brings back old memories, huh Angel?" Faith laughed as she turned
her

back to everyone to put the weapons away.

"Please...It takes more than that to really hurt me, Love. I already don't feel
a thing," Spike said as he went to do his casual stroll over to her and almost
fell.

It was Angel who caught him and was holding him up it seemed. Faith turned
around and Angel and Spike tried to quickly make it look like Angel wasn't
holding up Spike somehow. They totally failed. There was no way the two of them
would ever stand so close to each other let alone be touching each other if it
wasn't fight related. Faith knew this of course and looked at Spike and tears
welled up in her eyes.

"Oh man," she sighed. She grabbed a towel and started to wipe Spike's face.

This was all too heavy for Connor too too heavy. Why couldn't they just be
killing something? That was always fun. Connor realized he didn't hate Spike at
all. In fact he was even cooler than before. He wasn't sure exactly what
happened in the past with Faith or even now. All he knew is Spike just totally
got the shit beat out of him for her, and as shitty as today was she'd end up
feeling better for it. Connor also realized something else as Faith wiped the
blood off Spike's face and looked at him. Connor was never going to have Faith
in any way. Not in the way he had Cordelia, because there was someone else, but
that was okay. Faith was never his.

She understood him, but did she really know him? Had Cordy?

Connor made himself turn away from them. He made himself not hear what they were
saying. It was none of his business. But, he did hear a "Baby" and her making
fun of him for saying it. "I'm not your Baby. I'm nobody's baby now. I've been
grown up for a real long time and all the things I've done are my fault," She
said.

"Bollocks!" Spike said. That was like "Bullshit", right? What did he mean?
Connor knew it was none of his business. He went to leave.

"Connor...I mean Brian...You do want to be called 'Brain' now, right? I mean you
ARE Brian," Angel sighed.

Yes and no and yes and no. Connor could only shrug. When he was only Brian he
may have run off at the mouth a bit, but he always knew what to say.

"I don't really...Maybe tonight you saw how...What I mean is.." The dude was
stammering. He really did look 28, like an annoying Cop or older guy that moved
in

on your girl, but something about him did seem older than dirt. Spike didn't.

"Faith!" Someone yelled, "What the fuck did you do to her?"

"Hey, hey, hey," Angel was saying as he held the guy back from hitting Spike. It
already seemed like he hit Spike once because Spike was on the ground.

Angel WAS really quick when it came to stopping fights or starting them.

"Robin, be cool. It's five by five," Faith said to the guy. Five by five? What
was that? Something Connor should remember? Oh, it was the Principal. It was
almost funny to see Angel stopping a Principal from hitting Spike.

"No, it's not! You're bleeding and crying. The minute I find a reason to trust
HIM he gives me five reasons not too!" The principal shouted. Maybe five by five
was a code give someone five reasons to trust you and they can overlook five
reasons not to.

"I'm not bleeding this is his blood. I hit him...a lot," Faith frowned.

"Why did you hit him? He must have done something to you for you to hit him like
that. God knows you think he's the greatest thing since cooked food!" The
Principal was yelling too much.

"He wasn't hurting her. He was helping her!" Connor spat.

Principals shouldn't get in your face like that. Neither should a boyfriend.
Connor wanted to hit him. Angel warned Connor with a glare that he was not to
hit the Principal. Yes, sir Dad! Connor wanted to hit Angel now, but that would
just be psycho.

"Well, pardon me then! I should have realized when I saw my girlfriend covered
in blood and crying with the vampire that's known to kill Slayers, that he was
yet again helping her save the day!" The Principal had calmed to a sarcastic
simmer.

"No one's blaming you, Woody...It is totally tweaked. An unconventional training
method. We were...we were Role-playing. It's like method acting. You have drama
here at Sunny high, right? Believe it or not I had drama in prison...Acting can
be a great way to train...We are combining it with jujitsu and Tie Quando giving
us a real edge in fighting style," Faith laughed.

"And street fighting...Can't forget the street fighting, Love," Spike laughed in
kind.

"She's NOT your Love," The Principal said with venom. But, he wasn't yelling
anymore.

"You had drama in prison?" Angel asked. Had he always been weird?

"I was Macbeth...How's that for irony?" she laughed. Angel did too.

"Hello! Here I am Faith. Clueless as usual. Who's the well-dressed peace-keeping
bouncer in MY gym? Who's the kid? Wait...I've seen him before. Please don't tell
me your bringing another one of my students into this!" The Principal said.

He had a much calmer tone now, Sort of like that "I'm not angry, just
disappointed" principal tone. He didn't remember Connor exactly. No one did.
Angel was like

a "Well-dressed Peace-Keeping bouncer." Everyone remembered him.

"This... is Angel," Faith smiled broadly, "He's my boy. The one who saved me
from myself..."

"No, no I didn't. Only you could do that...I just helped. You were the one that
saved me from MYself, not to mention everyone else," He smiled sheepishly.

"No, it was you...you were the one that gave me the wake-up call," She insisted.


"But you were the one that did wake-up and saved me from Con- You saved me," He
said.

Yes, but she wouldn't remember how, would she? Bastard. Maybe he should be glad.
Fred remembered and seemed to hate him.

"I just-" Faith began. Connor had wanted to hear how she did remember it.

"This is the other vampire!" The principal said in realization.

"The other vampire with a -yea-yeah...My friend," Faith said.

"I didn't think he'd be so tall. Other than that he looks so normal. The other
one...I'm Wood," The Principal said as he sort of circled Angel and reluctantly
extended his hand.

"Actually, I was the FIRST vampire to get a soul...I was the ONLY one until a
few years..." Angel was mumbling as he shook the principal's hand.

"Yeah, well! Spike WANTED his soul. He asked for it. He FOUGHT for it. You were
just forced into getting it!" Connor spat.

"It doesn't matter. They both have souls now. They are both good and strong and
they saved my ass a bunch of times... I can't fight the mission with out either
of'em," Faith was talking to her boyfriend, and not even looking at Connor. But,
Connor could feel Angel's eyes boring into him as he started at the gym floor.

"Well, Blade's been reading up on his Uncle Spike, or his nephew Spike,
or...You've been reading up on me," Spike was beaming, even though he had a huge
black eye.

"I've been at Wolfram. I read the summary of your file. I kind of had a feeling
that you were evil...once, and I wanted to know- why--how...I hope you don't
mind,"he said.

"My life is an open book, Blade. I've done things that you can't imagine, but I
won't deny any of them...Bad or good. I've got nothing to hide," Spike smiled.

Faith pulled out sunglasses from her pocket and put them on Spike's face.

"You might wanna hide the eye, though. Just so you don't scare away the chicks.
Some of em' like the whole I wear-my-sunglasses-at-night-guy-thing," Faith
smiled.

"Bullshit! You have plenty to hide!" The Principal yelled at Spike.

"Don't place the blame on a guy in shades, Wood," Spike smiled. Faith snickered
and stopped when the Principal glowered.

"You better watch yourself, Spike," The Principal said coolly with venom.

"Oh c'mon, Woody. You make bad eighties reference jokes all the time," Faith
laughed.

"Oh!" Angel said suddenly like he realized something. The principal and Spike
looked tense for a second. Connor supposed neither of them trusted Angel.

"Don't place the blame on a guy in shades...it's from that song. I remember
that! I liked that song!" Angel exclaimed. Connor really didn't remember this
weirdness.

Maybe it happened in the past year. Angel was going senile.

"Bugger this!" Spike chuckled and seemed to go to leave.

"That's right! Just slip out when it comes close. It's what you do!" The
Principal snapped. It looked like Spike had stopped trying to leave because he
remembered how hurt he was.

"I'm not gonna shout out what other people's cards are if THEY want to hide
them, just because I had a hand in dealing them out. When they want to lay them
down on the table- I'll bloody be there," Spike grumbled.

"You'd have to be. Where could you go? But, I bet you'll finally be sorry...When
you lose what isn't yours!" The Principal seemed to warn. Connor thought they
should check this guy out; HE could be an assign spy or something.

"I never claimed anything was mine, Wood. Except the bloody hand I was dealt.
You weren't the only boy dealt a raw one, you know...But, I'm tryin' to play
mine the best I can now...open hand...What the bloody hell are you playing at, I
often wonder," Spike said.

"Spike!" Faith put her hand up, "My man doesn't have to talk about painful stuff
if he doesn't want to. He's taken some shit from some s...s...it's obvious. So,
he has a hard time accepting you're not evil, and if you don't stop with the
cheese-ass card metaphors so will I. Do you have a gambling problem or
something?"

"Not anymore," Spike sighed.

Connor could smell and hear someone familiar entering the gym now. He was
relieved it was Gunn.

"Hey Boss...tonight's quiet, but we got word that people are everywhere, and get
this: lots a guys are comin' in that are human and have government ties like
that last guy Faith did. Harris said that if that's true we can expect some of
the assassins to be...all right you ready for this? Invisible and human!" Gunn
shook his head.

"Hmmm," Angel sighed and held his chin.

"Who's invisible now?" The Principal asked in dignified surprise now.

"And this is Gunn... Gunn this is my man, Robin... Believe it or not, Baby. I
actually have no dodgey history with Gunn. He's just a cool guy who's a great
fighter. He could probably handle this whole Rhoshobi deal himself," Faith said.


"Aw, I dunno about that. That Willow says she has a de-invisibility ray. We may
need that to save our asses...She's afraid that the de-invisibility ray will
turn the invisible people to goo because it turned visible people to goo when
they were turned invisibI thI think...Don't really get it. She's just afraid of
killing our friendly human assassins. That girl is too damn nice." Gunn said and
nodded "Hey," to the Principal.

"Just you wait until one of them hurts her lady-love...Actually, let's not. I'm
bloody tired of this. We should just shoot first," Spike snorted.

"No! No killing humans if we don't have to!" Faith gasped.

"I'm with Faith, but if it comes down to them or one of my people, all people
whether I can see 'em or not won't see me comin'," Gunn said.

"Are you human?" The Principal asked Gunn. Connor was glad he had been forgotten
now.

"Born and raised," Gunn answered as they shook hands.

"What difference does that make?" Faith grumbled.

"I like to know I have something in common with the people that are fighting by
my side," The Principal said.

"We ALL have the most important thing in common. The mission to fight evil! And
we are all friends here no matter what we are!" Faith said.

They didn't seem to all be friends at all. In fact, the only person that lin
th
them all together was Faith.

"This is Blade," suddenly Faith was next to him with her arm around him. She
smelled sweet and musty under Spike's blood.

"Blade? Like the movie vampire hunter? He isn't one of my students?" The
Principal asked.

"No, he's Angel's son," Faith said.

"But, that's not possible, right?" The Principal eyed Connor suspiciously.

"He's a miracle. Special," Faith said. Connor felt a bitter-sweet pain come over
him.

"So, he's ANOTHER vampire with a soul," The Principal sighed, like he was bored
with the whole idea.

"No, I'm not!" Connor sneered.

"The boy's human. He has all of our strengths and none of our weaknesses," Spike
said. Spike seemed to like saying that. Connor smiled uncomfortably.

"Oh, I get it...It's like the movie. You bit his mother and he was born with the
vamp strength," The Principal deduced. Connor felt like his insides were
draining.

"NO! I'm the boy's father!" Angel snapped.

"No, you're not!" Connor bellowed. He wanted to smash something. Anything.

"And suddenly I'm so incredibly bored with this meet and greet," Spike said he
had his arm around Connor. He was leaning on him. "That not true. I was bored
with it from the bloody start what do you say we go to the pub?"

"Yeah, sure!" Connor said.

"Who's coming?" Spike asked.

"I'm in," Gunn said.

"Not me...I can tell you're in that mood where you want to start trouble, and
I've had enough blood spilled on me tonight," Faith said.

"Let's go," The principal said quietly to Faith now, and he took her away.

"For a cool looking dude with a fine girl he seems pissed about something," Gunn
commented.

"Eh, He's pissed at himself is all. No one else left to be pissed at," Spike
said.

"So, what is with the sunglasses at night, Dude?" Gunn asked.

________________________________________________________________________________________________

"Oh, look 'The little Rascal's' is on...That's what the world needs more shows
about orphans like us," Faith said to Robin as she crashed on the couch.

"I don't think they're orphans. I just think you never see the parents like in
'Peanuts.' You know Faith. I wasn't exactly an orphan. I mean I was, but not
like you... I

had a family that-"

"No, no...I think they're orphans. We watch this all the time, and there are
never any parents just teachers and cops. It sorta was like that, huh? But, when
you have a gang it looks fun. I kinda have a gang now. You know, I think 'The
little Rascal's' was called 'Our gang' too...A gang of orphans, like us," she
sang happily. Shewas in a weird mood-giddy and relaxed. Sort of goofy. Maybe
this is what Red felt like all the time. Faits acs actually glad that Red's
protection spell was aroundthe house that Faith and K shared. Most of the time
she didn't like the idea of the protection spell. It could get you too relaxed
when you needed to be on guard. But

now, she wanted down time with her man after all the fists and fangs and various
nasty-ass things like hands on her throat. She had taken off hands on her
throattoday. It was nothing she hadn't done before, but for some reason it had
been completely different. She had left these hands attached to their owner, who
she hadleft alive. He hadn't been trying to hurt her, but she had been so
afraid. What was she afraid of? She was the Slayer- she could take anyone's hand
off of her throat.She could beat the shit out of them before they could even
think of doing anything else. No one could touch her that she didn't want. At
least not for that long to

really do anything. At least not every Thursday for a year while their wife was
at fucking Church Bingo.

Everyone was right about who she was then. She wirtyirty and evil and stupid.
Why had it taken a year for her to run away? Because he said he loved her
after?Because he always apologized and then told her she wasn't dirty and evil?
She was- had been. She had thought about going back and killing him so many
times, but it turned out she was also a chicken shit, because she never did it.
There were other people that were so much more easily in her reach to do all the
things that she wanted to do to him. THAT was why she was afraid! She was afraid
of herself. If someone made her angry she could snap and become evil again.
**with a trigger they make you dance with yourself.** She had to ask Spikee
e
about his trigger. What was it? What had stopped it? She would someday, but she
felt too goofy tothink about it now. She kissed Robin on his dark bald head and
followed him into the kitchen. She had been so angry at Spike- she never thought
he was really HIM. She wasn't psycho. Not anymore anyway. She was angry because
Spike knew. Somehow he had known what she had done, who she had been. It
tattooed her. But, then she hadn't killed him. Hadn't really hurt him, he said.
She was as mad and bad as Hell fire and she had been able to stop it. He had
started it, but SHE stopped it. And then he had hugged her, like Angel had all
those years ago in the rain. But, Angel was the one who had stopped it then. Now
it had been Faith. "I'm proud of you, Baby," Spike said.

Faith laughed out loud now. Damn Victorian guys! They could be so sexist.
Shouldn't call a woman "Baby" in the work-place or "Love" or "Pet" really.
Imagine Wes calling her "Baby!" Imagine Wes saying he was "proud" or anything
really besides: "That isn't a good idea." Wes was cooler when he was desperate.
He had been all gung ho for Faith to do ANYTHING to save Angel, even if it meant
being her old nasty self he hated. He had been proud of her then. Maybe that was
why Giles and B were so tight, they had gone through desperateness. It probably
was a plus B n B never tortured Giles, or jumped on his lap to painfully squash
his hard-on she saw arise while she was doing it. Faith laughed again.

"Hello? Are you even listening to me?" Robin half smiled at her.

He was at the sink now scrubbing his hands free of Vampire blood. He was a
really clean and shiny guy. The kind that always filed their nails down and
shaved for you so they'd never scratch you up. The kind that always smelled like
Irish Spring and tasted like Big Red. She hugged him from behind and hooked her
chin over his shoulder.

"Sorry...long night. Glad to end it with you... Not that it's over yet," she
smirked into the mirror at him.

"No, it's not... I want to talk to you about some things," he said seriously.

"Uh-oh," She said flatly.

"Uh-oh?" he questioned. She felt light, but she also felt fizzy and tired. She
just wanted his hands to feel how light she was. She wanted to float above him
in lightness. It made sense that this was when some big boom was going to come
crashing down.

"You want to 'talk to me about some things'," she sighed, "I'll bet that's
usually what you say to kids before you kick them out of Sunny High for smoking
weed."

"That's not what I'm going to say, but now that you mention it this place kinds
reeks of it," he smirked.

"You talking about the pot-smell? It's the Red-head. It's all the Red-head!"

Kennedy said as she walked into the kitchen with Red. She grabbed Red's hand and
kissed it and then pulled her close. Just what Faith needed, to see a happy
couple when she was about to get dumped.

"That's not true! I don't even live here. It can't be me," Willow squealed.

"What are you guys up to?" Robin asked.

"We went to a poetry-slam. Then...I solved the invisibility ray problem, I
think. You see when it makes things invisible it's is converting their atomic
half-life into a fraction of what it normally would be, but when it turns you
visible all it does is intensify the density of your molecules for a minute. So,
in figuring that out, I see no reason why it would hurt the people that are
trying to kill us if they are already invisible and we make them visible!
So...cool!" She said giddily.

"Yippie! Now we can see them and smash their murder-for-hire faces...right?"
Robin asked.

"Right!" Willow beamed. "You really are SO much cooler than Snyder...I don't
think he'd ever say 'yippie' or talk about smashing faces...unless it was a
student's

face...Did you have a semi-evil Principal in high school, Honey?" Red asked K.

"Totally Evil. She suspended me for having a girlfriend...Well, for having a
girlfriend and doing stuff that you do with a girlfriend...in her office...But,
we couldn't do it in the dorms. There was no privacy!" K said.

"I wonder what my life would have been like if I knew I was gay in high-school?
It wasn't so hip yet, so I'd be a total outcast...So, exactly the same then. "
Red figured.

Faith looked at Kennedy looking at Red. She was in total thrall when everything
the other person said hits you like a brick wall of brilliance, especially their
jokes.

Faith thought Robin's jokes were great. Sometimes Robin even looked at her like
that. Now what? Was he going to be mad about Spike again? Was he going to say he
"had it" again? After the last healing that is what Robin said. She could see
how it would be hard for him. She had passed out for a change after her demon
had killed all the electro-demons. (Why couldn't that guy she had killed with
the demon been an electro-demon and not an electro-human. She thought of Gwen
Raiden.)

Spike had gotten that demon away from her throat in his Billy Idol roof-top
dance, and as soon as he did the demon came out. She knew it was coming this
time.

She had wanted it to come. She knew Spike knew too. It killed them all. It
turned the one that had tried to choke her inside out. Dawn had closed her eyes.
Faith felt herself falling down. She knew there were two more that were climbing
the stairs to get to the roof. She HEARD them, even though she was passed out
cold and dying and not moving she could hear everything. She did expect her head
to hit the pavement as it had so many times before in life. But, he had caught
her with onelean ropey arm like she was a stake someone threw to him. His other
arm was arminriflrifle, which had actually been of use for once.

"Behind you!" Spike had warned Woody and Harris. They were probably gawking at
Faith falling. She had to tell them not to do that. When the demon was don
raging they still had to stay sharp. The battle could still be going on. Spike
fired two shots while he held her. He had already started with the light. She
thinks he even started it BEFORE she went down that time. That would be
something new. Before it had been like waiting somesome girl to pee so you could
get the bathroom stall.

It was getting easier for him. It was changing for both of them. She had woke-up
and lifted up his shirt because she could get more of it that way. The heat. The

healing heat of him. She was beginning to realize that whatever the power was it
also was him, like he put his flavor on it or marked or something. She couldn't
put it

into words, so of course she never talked about it. She assumed it was like the
way Red talked about magic. Red sometimes would sense magic and say something

like "Oh, that spell is sooo Amy. It has her pissy-ness all over it." Or, "Oh,
that spell is so sweet it's so Michael." If only Red didn't still harbor the
secret resentment

she did, maybe Faith could talk to her about it.

There was really nothing Faith could have done any differently. She needed
Spike's healing to live. She was like a dry sponge that soaked up the water. It
had been

really hot the last time. Like Jacuzzi hot when you have a fucked up back. Spike
had a habit of holding her really tight and close to get it all into her. Then
something

happened. She felt a bitter-sweetness in the light, like it would be going out
soon and it was looking forward to it, but it was sad it was ending. It was
Spike. She had

pulled away. He had never been sad about it ending before. He was happy all the
way through, she knew. Something was wrong. She didn't want him to be sad.

Sad because of her. So, she pulled away. He gently chided her for breaking the
connection. He said she had to know that wasn't what to do.

She had felt very odd, like a four-year-old child instead of a demon possessed
her.

"I didn't want you to be sad...Sad like that because of me," she heard herself
say and her lower lip stuck out and she cried and it felt so incredibly weird.
She may

not cry often. But she did cry at huge things like when she killed a human being
or when she one of her friends was in eminent danger of death. So, once a month
then? She seemed to like to cry in front of Spike.**I'm your sodding Barbra
Walters. But, this crying had been wicked weird, like the crying tonight.

Robin had seen this crying as well as tonight's little fun-fest. In between the
shirt lifting and the grabbing and the crying she could understand why Woody had
said he had "Had it." She was genuinely shocked when Robin accused the healing
of being some kind of sex thing. But, looking back she could see how he could
think that. She couldn't tell him what it was. She couldn't even tell herself.
She just said that she needed Spike to live because she had been a "dumb ass and
taken in the demon any good Slayer would reject." Then Robin started to convince
her she was not a dumb-ass. She was a hero to take in the demon and that whole
nine. Then it was all five by five with them again. But maybe him seeing the
after-math of training had set off Robin's trigger again.

The training had been weird too, but Faith knew it was necessary, like a knife
in the gut to save another person's life. While it was going on she swore she
was going to hate Spike forever. She swore she would run to the other side of
the planet aff hff herself- finally- because the bottom had finally fell out.
She always knew it would, right? But, that wasn't how she felt at all. She felt
light or like a normal woman a little or something. She felt like singing "I
feel Pretty"- not really, of course-but something like that. But, of course the
bottom was going to fall out now with Robin. That's how it goes, right?

She had used the code-word when she talked to Kennedy that let her know that
Faith need to be alone with her man ASAP. They both had code-words for "go away
because I want to get laid." Kennedy's was "cat" and Faith's was "dog."
Sometimes Faith thought Kennedy told Red the code-words. She wasn't supposed
to.Women.

"So... Is everything okay?" she asked Robin. Of course, Robin had wanted to rip
Spike's head off a few hours ago. But, Faith just accepted that as base-line
now. He was actually really mellow outside of all the times Spike annoyed him.
And that was what-twice a week? Much better than her Hothead.

"No...There are people trying to kill you," He looked at her confused.

"No, that's nothing! It'll allw ovw over and then it'll all get really boring
around here again with no Hellmouth... I don't mean that," she scoffed.

"It sounds like you'll be disappointed," he sighed.

"I won't be... Well, I might be...depending on what you wanna tell me," she
said.

"Tell you?" he asked.

"Yea, What are you chickening out now? Are you NOT gonna tell me and just take
off when this is all over?" she demanded. She knew Wood was a real fighter. He
wouldn't leave when he knew he could be useful in the mission.

"Take off?"

"Yeah, well, I guess you wouldn't. You do have a job here and a house and no
criminal record...Man, you are really different than all my other guys."

"And that's a bad thing?" he asked coyly.

"No! It's just the others were such losers...and more like me."

"Faith!" he scoffed and pulled her into his lap. She would have kicked his ass
if he had tried anything like that two years ago. Of course, she had been in
jail then, so if some guy was doing that there was more than one problem.

"You said you have to talk to me about some things. That usually means bad 'you
suck' things," she said softly and rubbed his head.

"No, well...they are more like 'I suck' things," he said. He closed his eyes as
she rubbed his head like a cat she'd make friends with in an alley.

"Oh shit! No!" she got up turned out away from him as if there was something to
look at outside the window other than black.

"I'm sorry...there are things-things I should have told you about myself from
day one, but things just happened the way they did and---" he began.

"No, it's my bad too. I kind of had a feeling something was up, and I never
asked you because I didn't want to hear the truth, because if I knew it I knew
we couldn't keep it up," she said. She was going to be adult about this, and not
but it all on him.

"Keep what up?"

"Being together, dumb-ass!" she blurted out. Well, it was a stupid question!

"See, this is why I didn't want to say anything! There is no reason why we can't
be together. This is just more Slayer bullshit!"

"That is really low, Wood! Calling THIS Slayer bullshit!"

"Well, what else is it?"

"Normal person 'bullshit?' I think if you ask anyone if they just want to keep
up the status quo when they find out their honey is married nine out of ten-"

"Married! I'm not married!" he scoffed in shock

"Oh, so it's just some other girlfriend then? That's supposed to make it okay?
It's the same."

"I don't have another girlfriend...or a boyfriend before you go there next you
insane woman...When you said you knew I thought maybe Spike hinted or something.
I've heard him do it, just to fuck with me," Wood grumbled.

"Okay, now I am confused...But a brief but bitter affair between you and----"
she smirked.

"Don't even!" he grimaced. She loved the amused outrage in the boys' tones when
she would pull that out.

"Well, it would explain a lot," she covered her grin with her mouth.

"Well, here is something that would explain it even more.... My mother was a
vampire Slayer...and I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I never meant to hide it from you! It
was just when I told Buffy Summers...well...things got really strange between us
and I didn't want anything like that to happen with you. You weren't exactly
trusting of me at first...And...I guess not telling you this would really make
you be trustful of me now, right? God, I just realized- I'm a total moron. But,
I swear Faith I'm a good moron, who wants to treat you right, if you'll let me."


"You're MOTHER was a Slayer? That is the stuff you had to talk to me about?"
Faith asked with her mouth hanging open.

His mother! Slayers could have children? The light feeling in her seemed to get
to be too much and she felt dizzy.

"Well, yes....There's more...like My mother's Watcher retired and raised me,
Bernard. That's why my family is English, see? And he's coming to town and his
father is coming to town. His father is a really powerful warlock that might be
able to help you get your demon out. But, they don't get along...so when you
meet one don't talk about the other... and am I being a total moron again by
dragging you into family shit already?" Wood said in one breath.

"Let me get this straight. Your mother was a Slayer. She died. I'm assuming I
know how---vampires?" Faith asked.

"Well, yeah...one," he said.

"And your mom's Watcher raised you and his Dad is some bad-ass warlock that can
help us?" Faith asked. A family! A slaying family! Like B's!

"Well, yes...I'm sorry Faith. I just wanted it to be about us and not families
and the past and Slaying...I didn't-"

"This is so fucking cool! Do you know that? Do you know how wicked cool this is?
I mean besides you Mom being dead, but at least she had a cool Watcher. Wes has
his strong points, but he'd probably get our kid sucked down a Hell dimension."

"Well, I hope we'd be alive to raise our kid." Robin said with a cool smile.
Faith couldn't go there. Not yet. She had just realized two seconds ago that she
COULD have a child. She couldn't deal with the idea of being alive to raise it
too!

"Was your Dad a warlock? Was he a demon? A bad ass warrior from a Hell
dimension?" she asked. She could deal with what it was like to be a Slay-kid
more.

"Well, he was a cop fromoklyoklyn. He died in a drug bust gone bad...You know
Faith a Slayer can have a relationship with a normal guy."

"Maybe some of them can, but I'm way luckier than that...I get to have one with
you!"

She pulled him up from the chair and kissed him. It seemed like being a Slay-kid
was lonely. Faith knew about that, or she had. But she didn't feel lonely now.
She

seemed to feel good as a Slay-Kid... and now there was a possibility of being a
Slay-Mom...one dmaybmaybe, if she liked?

B had wanted so much to just be a normal woman. One of the things that brought
Faith peace in herstormed up life was knowing that B was having a normal life in
that human-Angel dimension. But,Faith had never really wanted to be normal.
Maybe because she had passed up normal way before slayage. She wouldn't know how
to be normal. She wished she wished she was normal. That's what people should
want, right? But, she had always been a little...corrupt, in her love of the
Slay. She loved having a man that would throw down and fight, that would risk
his bad-fine human ass, not for her. Robin had been doing this long before her.
He did it because he liked to fight too.

Robin had his arms around her waist. She let him walk her backwards into her
bedroom as she deftly steered around some of her junk in the way.

"Spike's coat," Robin sighed as he picked up her long leather duster he has
tripped on.

"No...It's mine. He doesn't come in here. HA! I'm not going to let you ruin
tonight, Robin Wood," she said. Spike really didn't come in her room. He waited
outside

the doorway like it was a house in and of itself he needed to be invited into.
Faith hadn't realized this until now. He could be so weird.

"What's tonight?" Robin asked.

"Aw, are you gonna make me girlie and say something lame like: 'Our relationship
had reached a whole new level of trust.'"

"Has it? I have to drop huge secrets on you more often... Let's see, when I was
seventeen I joined a cult to try to find and curse the vampire who killed my
mother-Surprise!"

"No. Don't tell me that one. Cults aren't cool... letting someone control your
mind. It'll make me think you're easy controlled... But, hey maybe I shouldn't
complain,"

she said as she tackled him onto the bed. He laughed and looked up at her with
those dancing brown eyes and ran his fingers through her hair.

"This WAS a cool cult... We wore a lot of black and listened to 'Slayer' and
captured vamps and various other slime and practiced all our fighting moves on
them,"

"Slayer!....Slayer! I never thought I'd hear that word in that cheesy context
again!" She cackled. She and Robin seemed to have a silent agreement not too
probe into

each other's childhoods too much. They both had been obviously sucky. But,
picturing him in a pentagram shirt was just too funny.

"Well, I was really into Public Enemy at the time, but 'Slayer' went along with
the whole spooky magic thing better...But, you should know there is no
controlling this wild stallion. I spilt when the cult got too culty," he said

"I didn't think the whole animal sacrifice thing would go along with your
vegetarianism. Did you ever get the vamp that got your Mom? I don't even wanna
think about all I would have done at seventeen to make them dead...No, I don't
want to think about all I would have done to make them suffer, the killing part
is fine, " she grumbled. She probably wouldn't have left when the cult got too
culty. She wasn't good like he was, or had not been.

"I love you, Faith. I do. No matter what I throw at you- you're never thrown,"
he sighed shakily,like she was the amazing hitting-him-like-a
-brick-wall-person. She

rolled off of him and concentrated on the feeling of her body against the
mattress. So, this was the real McCoy? Love.

"...except you sort of seem a bit thrown now,"Wood said as he looked over her
and took her hand. He smiled knowingly as if he'd been expecting it.

"Tell me your Mom was a vampire Slayer and you joined a cult and listened to
'Slayer' and I'm good...But..."

"Tell a Slayer you love her and she freezes up or runs...Maybe it's some warped
fight or flight thing," he laughed in a quiet sad way.

"I'm not running...Shit, I'm not even freezing up! I guess everything is going
right...besides that there is a huge hit out for me," she beamed and rubbed his
head again.

They kissed while he took off her jeans. They both shook with laughter while
doing this.

"And there is a demon inside of you that could kill you," he reminded is a
sing-song voice as he poked her nose.

"No, I think the demon could be the best thing that ever happened to me
...honestly, because I have to try to control it. Just like my own real
demons...or my own less real metaphorical demons... Tonight really was a huge
night!" she exclaimed.

"For us," he stated.

"Yeah! But, other stuff happened too. It's like Drew says: 'Your whole life just
boils down to four or five days that really matter.'"

"Uh, you're quoting that guy Andrew?"

She almost felt frustrated, because she desperately wanted him to know all of
what she meant, but words weren't enough. She wanted to tell him that she was
working very hard, and the work was it's own reward, but he would just think it
would be about slaying and it wasn't. It was about him and her. It was about who
she had become.

"No Drew Barrymore, Swifty," she laughed.

"Right, of course I should have known," he said dryly and she punched his arm
lightly and laughed. You had to take your inspiration where you could get it,
and for a

while all she had was prison movie night.

"I mean, so many other things happened today... Things and people that I just
take for granted... People care about me now. They care about me outside of what
I can do for them. Good people. Not ls, os, or snakes. Maybe it helps that I'm
not being a loser or a snake myself... Snakes, you know how they kill people?
They squeeze the life out of them. Strangle them," she told him. She knew that
she was failing in explaining herself, but he seemed content to listen as her
light hands rubbed his back.

"Angel is here. He came just for me, and what is he getting out of it-
nothing...And his kid is here. He barley knows me and he's fighting for
me..."she continued.

She wanted to tell him more about Angel.

"I think that kid wants you," he sighed.

"You think everybody wants me...and Wes, Oh my God, Wes! After everything I did
to him... And not just them. Look at all of my peeps, man! I have mad
peeps,yo!... You know, people," she was afraid she was losing him now. He seemed
weirded out by something

"Yes, I know...You also have blood in your hair," he told her. He had found a
dirty clump of hair and was holding it out from her head like it would taint her
brain if it touched it. Maybe he thought that was what was happening as she went
on about Drew Barrymore and snakes and her friends.

"Come wash it out, " she commanded and pulled him towards the bathroom.

"You can see why I want this to be over, despite the peeps. You have blood in
your hair and you have some on your face. I just can't stand to see you hurt,"
he explained. Funny he felt he had to explain himself, as she knew she as the
one who made no sense, and he made all the sense in the world. Robin made sense
and she didn't. It was the perfect balance. You needed to have a balance to be
Zen.

"It's part of the job... I'm not hurt. It's kind of a turn on when you win,
right? I mean all that ungh(!) can really get you going, especially when you
have a good one to come home to... Admit it...Look you are," she said slyly as
she reached into his boxers and felt his raging hard on.

"I'm winning in a different way...It was about the fight- winning it-finally. I
mean it used to be, but ever since I found..." he sighed and sounded more
frustrated than

turned on as she ground against him in nothing but a tank top and a underwear.
Poor baby.

"You're the turn on for me not the fight. Maybe it was never about the fight. It
was about finding...finding you," he said. He grinded into her in return now.

"Maybe your just getting old," she said with a laugh. With that he lifted her
up. He knew she would. She had set it up. A tactical move, or dance step.
Dancing was

like living, dying, and fighting; Spike forgot about sex.

" ...though you feel fine to me," she said after she had taken her tank top off,
and pressed herself into him and him. He broke away from her mouth painfully.

"So, much blood in you hair... What happened?" he asked with wounded eyes.

"Spike. Spike happened. Happened to bleed a lot when I hit him in training," she
sighed. She closed her eyes not wanting to think about it. Spike was five by
five.

He was off doing what he did second best- drinking. He was with Blade and Gunn.
It was them Faith should feel sorry for- and the bartender. Soon Spike would be
moaning and wailing about B being in another dimension.

"This is his blood," Robin said in this low and fierce way that made Faith feel
like she had been caught in a lie. He set her down suddenly on the cold tile.

"Okay, why do I think you aren't upset because you are concerned for the boy's
welfare?" she smiled after she realized she hadn't done anything wrong. It was
jus Robin's weird thing about Spike. It did make more sense now, with his mother
being a Slayer and dying at the hands of a vampire.

"The boy...That THING is two hundred years old!" he snapped turning to face her
with wide-pissed off eyeoor oor Woody. She knew what it was like to be a ball of
misdirected anger.

"Actually," she sighed and turned on the shower water. "I think he's a hundred
and thirty- seven or older depending on which birthday you go by the siring one
or...not funny?" She smiled sheepishly as he scowled in fury. Yeah, there it was
misdirected anger.The kind you couldn't joke away like they liked to do.

"Look, we'll go wash it out," she said softly as she slipped out of her
underwear with a little ass shake. You could always screw out misdirected anger
, and wash blood away while you did it.

"C'mon," she smiled and grabbed his awesome muscley forearms. Mmmm. She couldn't
even fit her hands around them .

"Hey!" she snapped when he broke free of her hands and pushed them away. He had
actually just done a jujitsu shrimping technique to push her away. It was done
very gently and it wasn't a move to hurt another person, only to defend. That
was how jujitsu worked, but it was still a fighting move. She was always afraid
of coming on too strong literally, even though the Slayer strength didn't work
like that.

"You barley felt it. Do you feel anything I do? Or is the fighting the real turn
on... the blood. What the hell happened in my gym tonight between you and HIM?"

Robin demanded. Spike was often just HIM. Faith understood Spike was mouthy
catty bitch to other men. But, Faith felt like it wasn't Spike Robin was angry
at.

"You thought what you walked in on tonight with Spike was a turn in for me?
That's what you saw?" she asked shakily. She was caught totally off-guard.
Ambushed.

Ball-Room blitzed. Did her boyfriend think she liked hammering people's faces
in? Was she crying out of guilt because she liked beating Spike down after what
he had said?

"I don't know! You sure as hell didn't tell me what was going on? But you sure
had a captive audience for whatever you were doing... You're special training,
or you

special healing. Stupid mere mortal aging Robin wouldn't understand. I
understand he keeps that demon warm for you. Keeps it in you, and now you think
it's the

greatest fucking thing that ever happened! And now his vampire friend comes to
town to stick up for him. He's your other hero, with his frat boy face and all
his money and his servants! And that creepy kid that wants to fuck you...How old
is HE? Only in his 60s? " He said this all lowly but fiercely.

"You leave Angel out of this!" she shouted. "He was the only friend I had for a
long time. And, maybe he is my only friend- according to you- since the only
reason that anyone else gives me the time a day is because they want to fuck me!
Just because that is the only reason you were my friend-"

"I think you have that backwards, Faith. That was the only reason I was worth
getting to know. That's practically a quote. So, why are you friends with all
these men... Not men! These fucking vampires. Is it because the fight is just
such a turn on? Spike is a fucking genius! Did he really get you going-letting
you bash his face in like that? He let a lot of Slayers think they could beat
him down before he fucked them...literal or figurative, LOVE," he was laughing
like a maniac.

"You don't understand anything!" she still shouted, even though she knew this
wasn't him, she must have done something.

Still it was true. Faith didn't think Angel was some rich flashy superhero.
Well, she supposed he was, but Robin should only know all that it had entailed.
Spike and Angel did not think they were in some cool club with Faith. She would
have to work her ass off to make sure they didn't make each other bleed, and if
they did it wouldn't be a turn-on for anyone. But,she had said it, didn't she?
That the slay was a turn on, while she was trying to seduce him feeling all
giggly and cute inside, like Red or Dawn something. She could NEVER be innocent
or light. What was she thinking?

"I see his blood is all over you, and I KNOW to that animal there is a fine line
between blood and sex, and it disgusts me, Faith. It's disgusting!" he shouted
back

now.

"I am not an animal! I am not disgusting! I'm NOT!" She could hear herself
scream with that shrillness she hated. It was the pitch her voice had reached
with Spike.

She reached back and threw the soap dispenser at him. It missed him and hit the
bathtub wall and shattered. It was one of the ones that had animals on it. "Oh,
poor little monkey!" Red would gasp when she saw it.

"Oh, oh God! Robin ,I'm sorry... I'm sorry...I'm sorry," she covered her mouth
and backed up. She was terrified.

*************************************************************************************************

"Faith!" Robin yelled. It was the first thing that she heard since the screaming
in her head had started. She realized she had her tank top and cut-offs back on.
She

was running running running. She had forgotten her shoes. Robin was following
her in his car. Why was she running? She was running away from the Incredible
Hulk.

Wesley was wrong the incredible Hulk was no myth. She kept running in to the
woods. What could she say to defend herself? She needed to defend him from her.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Angel didn't want Connor to go off drinking with Spike, his rn ben being that
Connor was two months shy of twenty-one. Connor swore he wouldn't listen to
Angel of course, but then he threatened to fire him from the Wolfram
"internship" and that would look bad to Brown

and his real parents of course.

So, Dawn Summers was talking. She said there was this place where they could go
to hang out. He might even "get served" if he was lucky. But, as he sat
listening

to her over the typical college band music, he didn't care about drinking
anymore. He was too pissed off at Angel. Dawn was talking really fast and she
seemed to

be dropping a lot of things. She seemed to do that a lot. So, she didn't seem to
have any physical power, not anymore. Her file at Wolfram had the the most
scant. She was a key. She was not anymore. Her family accepted her as always
being there after they found out the memories were fake. They might as well have
been real. Her family knew who she really was and they loved the real her. He
had been on a quest to find Dawn Summers thinking that she would be the one
person tounderstand exactly how they didn't fit. But, this girl didn't seem to
understand anything.

"So, that is so cool that you are taking Russind Fnd French? Why Russian? I
mean, Russia isn't very big on the map now... I mean they are physically, but,
politically

they aren't very---"

"I wanted to study Marx in his original language," Connor learned if he didn't
interrupt her she would just go on.

"Oh," she nodded, "So, he was that communist guy. He was Russian? That makes
sense that whole thing started in Russia. Why do you take French? Is it to read

about their whole 'Let them eat cake' thing? I don't get why she wanted them to
eat cake and why it was so insulting. It was an insult, right. I'm not really
good with

Non-American mainstream history... But I do know a lot about supernatural
history-"

"So, Dawn," he asked "What was it like when you remembered you were a key?"

"I-I never remembered it. I just found out," She said curtly and then stared
off. The one thing he wanted her to talk about shut her up.

"So, you didn't have any nightmares about what your life was life before. Your
REAL existence?" he asked.

"No, this is my real existence," she seemed to say this firmly.

"Sure, sure whatever," he sighed.

"It is. I've never known any other existence," she said snippily. So, she DID
know how to actually end a sentence.

"Well, your really lucky. You're just like everybody else," he sang.

"I-I try to be," she said.

"You try to be? Well, quit trying. You've arrived. You live here in this little
town with all these people who know who you are. YOU know who you are. Everyone

just accepts you. You've never done anything wrong,"

"Why do I feel like your making fun of me?" she said with folded arms.

"I'm not. It's just nice for you. You could sit here and talk about going to
college my major all night. You never even think about being a key, or anything
weird," he

sighed.

"It's nice for me? I never think about anything weird?", she demanded.

"This town I live in was on top of a Hellmouth. Then it sunk into the ground
taking a lot of my friends with it. Then it rose back up spitting only one of
them back out

with it. My mother is dead. My sister had to jump dimensions to keep this world
from falling into the hands of the Ultimate Evil because her friend disturbed
the

balance between gand and evil when she rose her from the dead. She died for me.
She sacrificed her life, so I wouldn't have to," she said.

"Well, at least you know your friends and your family really loved you. The
woman I loved sacrificed herself for an evil thing she thought was good. To this
day I

don't know if she ever loved me or if she was duped into it. It's the same with
my family now. Do they love me or is it just magic? I'll never fucking know,
Dawn! My

mother is dead too. She died for me, but was it because she loved me, or because
my soul was manipulating her to sacrifice herself... Just like my baby did to
the

woman I love...Maybe it runs in the family!"

She just sat there looking shocked. She couldn't take it either. The one person
that was supposed to be just like him.

"I'm sorry," he laughed "I should have known you would just be some stupid kid,
just like I thought I was... But, I never really bought it. I was always worried
there

was something wrong inside... I guess the monks do better magic than corporate
people, because your spell seems to have totally worked. Why can't it be who you

really are, if you've always believed it?"

"You want to talk my past memories as a key?" She said this so lowly he leaned
in. "When I was a key, I was nothing. Nothing but a horrible thing that could
open

up gateways to worlds making them all crash into each other. The worlds were
never meant to meet. I was made to make them meet. I wasn't a person, like you.
I

was never really a child. Your Mom died to save you? Well, mine just died! My
sister is in another world now. One that can't meet this one. That has a lot to
do with

me. The thing created to make worlds meet, but I can't get to her- ever!" She
was screaming at him now.

"So, yes... I believe I am Dawn Summers. I have memories of always being Dawn
Summers, memories with my sister and my mother, and I think about them and

talk about them and I'm happy for them... Because as a key I remember nothing. I
was nothing! You think I'm a key. Well, then you think I'm nothing!"

She ran, like any girl would run. Girlie and slow. He could have caught her so
easily. Dawn Summers said she had been nothing, but she felt something now.
Connor

wasn't sure if he felt anything.

He walked out of the place with his fists clenched in his pockets. He realized
humans were tailing him. Human men that wore all black and talked into there
little wrist

watches. There were do of them. Connor could hear their little mini-CBs.

"We found him. It matches the description. Repeat. We found the LA terrorist,"
one of them said. The LA terrorist? Connor couldn't help but laugh. He turned
and

ran to the guys. They looked for him where he had stood fifty yards away from
them five seconds ago.

"Didn't my Dad teach you anything about me?" he asked them from behind. They
turned to him with a gasp pointing their guns.

"47 magnums?" he laughed madly as he had taken their guns and pointed them at
him "To stop me from drinking with Uncle Spike? Don't you think that's a bit
strict?

And the LA Terrorist? Tell him I'm not the only one that can't think up my own
pet namer per people. That's what they called me in the papers right before the
spell!"

He ran away leaving them baffled. Connor picked up a dumpster and threw it down
the alley. He really did think Angel could find better trained men to trail him.
It

seemed he had in the past. Those guys were weak. Practically shouting into those
CBs that they spotted him. Auns?uns? Weak. But the lamest thing had to be that

LA terrorist thing. LA terrorist? Well that was why, right? That was Angel's
excuse for giving Connor to the his family. Connor HAD lost it. He could easily
see that

now after being with his real family- The Foxes. NO! Connor wasn't going to
start calling his family "the Foxes" in his head, even if he was calling himself
"Connor."

They were his family!

Why didn't he just give up completely and start calling himself "the LA
terrorist", like Angel was doing? Angel thought Connor was some sort of psycho!
That was the only reason he didn't want him to drink. It was like that asshole
Wesley said. It wasn't some pissing contest. It certainly wasn't because Angel
gave a rat's ass! How would his family feel if they knew he was the forgotten LA
terrorist of two years ago? Had they read about him in the paper? What was
happening in the world of Brian Fox two years ago? Oh, yeah he was making the
top one percent of his class. Tracy Stergo was doing him. That all seemed like
such a big deal. But, it wasn't because it was a lie!

Connor was denting the dumpster when someone tackled him. Great, more of Angel's
men. Well, if Angel wanted the LA terrorist... Connor punched the guy in the

face as hard as he could. They should go down. They were fast, but he smelled
the human all over them, like cheap cologne. He also smelled old vamp blood.

Maybe they just thought they'd be fighting another ordinary monster. They were
wrong. Connor hit them again as hard as he could. He was stunned when he got

knocked on the ground. He heard a girl grunt. A girl?

"Faith!" Connor gasped as she stood above him her face in an angry twist.

"Kid, God! I'm sorry," she smiled and pulled him off the ground.

"I hit you," he gasped.

"And I you. Well, I'm glad we got our first time out of the way," she laughed.
He had hit her before, of course but she hadn't remembered it. With only
Quar'toth and

LA and Angelus in his psyche he thought nothing of hitting her. But, all the
memories of ordinary life plagued him. He had hit a sweet hot girl.

Connor walked away from her and sunk down against the alley wall. He was trying
to hold his breath. He was hoping that she would say she had to go, that her

boyfriend would show up in his car and Connor would nod good-bye.

"Fuck me! What a night! At least I took out some vamps in my total fugue state.
I think some of em' were trying to get me for the Rhoshobi. I guess they figure
they

might as well give it a shot, since I'm coming for them anyway," she said.

Connor was such a freak. He knew he had blown it and he was crying in front of
her, but all he could think was that she was always saying she dropped out of

school, but she knew the term "fugue state."

"What is it? Did something happen? Is Spike okay? K and Red are still back at
the house, right? Please don't tell me that something happened to them because
they

were looking for me! Who is it? Gunn? It can't be Angel!" she gasped. He cried
more because he knew he was a total dick now because he really couldn't

remember which ones "K" and "Red" were.

"I hit you," was all he said. It wasn't as if he could tell her that everyone
was okay. What did he know?

"Is that it?" she laughed. "I can take that. It was an accident. I think I
deserve a few extras tonight... I totally lost it on my boyfriend before and I
threw soap at him.

After he told me he loved me, so someone should hit me, and the vamps weren't
really doing a good job of it."

"I-I don't know if I'm capable of love... Dawn was here before-and I was just so
mean to her... My sisters, my family, I want to protect them because I feel like
I

should. I like that I can do something. I'm here because I know I can fight and
that's something I can do well and I don't have to think and think until I'm
crazy," he

told her.

"Been there," she nodded. She asked what he meant or what he had done to Dawn.

"When I didn't remember who I was, when Angel had me under that spell, I WAS
happy. But, there were always these times... I felt like I was lost, or like I
was a

fraud, and now I know where that comes from so I can't go back, right? But,
maybe I just don't wanna go back because I know no matter what I can't love
them.

There's something wrong with me. What's wrong with me?" he asked. He had blamed
the spell, but Dawn Summers had shown him that wasn't the problem. HE was

the problem.

"Kid, there's nothing wrong with you. You're just scared is all, and who could
blame you? Even people that have those good lives- like you did. I'm sure they
get

scared like that too. But, you're asking the wrong girl. The only normal person
I knew, or know is B, and she is the bravest person I know. But, she sure was
fucked

in love... Well, I feel better, kind of. Where were you before?" she sighed. SHE
felt better? Who was "fucked in love?" B? The other Slayer? He had read some

about her in the files. Angel and Buffy had killed his real mother, and then
Wolfram had brought her back. It was only to make her and Angel suffer of
course, and

then Connor was born. "Isn't that what you call that other vampire Slayer? B.
Buffy. The one who screwed my Dad and made him lose his soul, and the one who

made Spike get a soul, but then she didn't want to go out with him. She was
normal?"

"I said you were asking the wrong girl Blade! What do you want? Bullshit
intellectual metaphors about love and dancing ... Go to him," she commanded with
a firm

laugh.

"Who?", he asked. She pointed to Connor's right and he turned to see Spike
standing there.

""ello, 'ello," he smirked.

"What... How long...How did you..." Connor stammered like an idiot.

"He's a fucking police dog! If only they had him on their side the cops would
have recaptured me ages ago, despite my fake ID courtesy of your Dad. I can't
change

my stench, Blade,"

"I want you," he pointed looking like Sid Vicious doing an Uncle Sam poster for
a second "to get a wiff of her. Learn her scent. You should be able to find her
in a

blinding snow storm if she'd ten feet below the Channel."

"Okay, sure. I can do that, " Connor assured getting up off his sorry ass.

"Man! How drunk is the English guy? Snow storm? Channel? We're in California,
Limey!" she grumbled as Spike helped her up. See, Spike was helping her up. She

was a girl. He shouldn't have hit her.

"Yeah and you West Coast Yanks are the worst always gripping about something.
What were you talking about? Did I hear my Buffy's name? You still whining

about mistakes past, Slayer?" he asked.

"No, mistakes present. We don't think we're capable of love," she said dryly.
She had said "we."

"Wha?" Spike's brow wrinkled. He wasn't smirking or laughing like Connor
thought.

"Well, Blade here feels guilty because he doesn't want to use the spell and go
and fully be with his family as they know him, and Robin told me he loved me
tonight

and I ended up throwing soap at him running out of my own house. We are wicked
bad people," she sighed and then winked at him. He was still confused but found

he was smiling.

"Not talking those little happy pills took balls, Blade. I know I slipped them
to your family, but it was your life in question, so the choice was yours. You
picked the

hard road. You have a pair, is all," Spike told him. Connor found holes in that
argument, but he remembered how exhausting arguing with Spike was.

"As for you, Firecracker, Did the soap get in his eyes? I'm sure he's crying
either way because you ran, but I don't see what is so bad with soap
throwing...If you

said a hot plate or the clichd frying pan...any kitchen wear really smarts, I
f" he" he sighed as if he really was remembering flying toasters coming at him.

"That's not the point! I'm the Slayer, Spike. I should be able to control
myself... I think you're right about Blade and the whole magic pill thing. But
you don't

understand, Spike. It's hard to love people that don't have the power we have.
We have extra responsibilities to them that they don't have to us," Faith said.
Yes,

that was it wasn't it?

"Oh Bugger that! You know what the two of youd isd is a good dance!"

"See told you," Faith smirked to Connor, "that wasn't very intellectual though"

"Not even Bullshit-intellectual," Connor pretended to sigh catching on to
Faith's dry wit. He wondered if Spike would let him get away with it too.

"No. You disappoint, English. What kind of dance would this be now? The dying
kind? The living kind? The sweaty dirty kind?" Faith continued.

"The kind where you get sweaty and I get dirty and we live and they die...
preferably," Spike said as he looked past them sneering.

"The Roshobi have a message for you," a gruff voice said.

"Oh goodie. A signing telegram. Let's have it," Spike sneered.

Connor looked over and saw five demons. They looked like they had scrawny
versions of the Beast's body as Connor saw their rock-like hands come out of
there

everyday looking shirts. They had weird eyes too, like Cordy's during a vision
but silver.

"You can't control our density," the demon said.

"Destiny," another corrected.

"Right, sorry. The Slayer is not yours to join with. You aren't the chosen
ones... So, we're here to make you knock it off," the demon said.

"You paraphrasing that last part, aren't you?" Spike asked as he circled the
demons.

"For the last time we aren't doing anything. The only thing you got right is
that me and Spike ARE not the chosen ones. I was never meant to be a Slayer. He
was

never supposed to get a soul. Can you just tell them that?" Faith demanded.

"We really aren't a two-way message service. We just deliver them to the people
we kill," one demon said and hit her.

Connor charged him angrily, and pummeled the thing with his fists.

"Did Angel give you guys those walkie-talkie cell phone things? I kinda forgot
mine," Faith said as she grabbed the fist of one of the assassins and grunted to
break it

off.

"I could call Gunn. He's in the bar, but I think he's on the phone with his
honey. Hate to interrupt," Spike said as he kicked one of the demons away.

"We don't need Angel's help," Connor snarled as bits of rock flew up at him as
he punched the demon. The thing hit back with surprising force and Connor hit
the

alley wall.

"So beginith our second training, Blade," Spike said as he grabbed the demon
that charged Connor and bent it's arm back.

"These are Ricochet demons. Say 'hello', Mate," Spike asked the demon as he
struggled to keep it in a half-nelson.

"Bite me!" the demon said.

"They aren't very polite, and are very sore-losers," Spike continued as he
grunted. Connor heard a crack. Spike had ripped the thing's arm off and threw it
to

Connor. He caught it on reflex.

"They can't see very well, so the best strategy is to keep tag-teaming them
switching who they are fighting... Oh, and you can kill them with pieces of
their own

body," Spike told Connor.

Connor threw the arm at the demon at it became a pile of rocks in clothes.

"Switch!" Faith yelled. Spike grabbed Faith and spun her into the demon he was
fighting and took on the demon she was fighting. Connor didn't feel left out he
had

two all his own.

"Bloody hell, Fi. No shoes?" he heard Spike grumble.

"Who are you? They said to expect mostly weak girls with strong weapons," one of
them demanded.

"I am a weapon," Connor smiled.

______________________________________________________________________________________________

He had been searching for her in his car panicked and clueless as usual. It
really must be love. No woman had ever made him feel this way before. He was
always Mr. Sensitive, yet slick. He took a lot of beautiful young professionals
out to really good restaurants and art galleries but he never promised anything
he didn't mean; he never told a lie. He knew how to treat a woman. So, why had
the one he wanted run away,literally? She had left him to get the third degree
from her rich bitch friend. Why did Faith runaway? He told Kennedy he didn't
know. Well, HE must have done something to make her run. Kennedy reminded him
Faith wouldn't just run away for no reason. Wouldn't she? She could. Kennedy's
lover Willow reminded Kennedy how Faith "could be." Kennedy became defensive for
a change- what was that supposed to mean? Robin thought he knew what it meant.
Kennedy reminded Robin she had heard him shouting. Why was Robin shouting at
Faith?

Robin was surprised Kennedy could pull herself away from her love-nest with the
constant punk ballads playing as an attempt the drowned out the sex sounds long
enough to hear Robin shouting at Faith. But, it was a good question regardless.
Why had Robin shouted at Faith when she had just been climbing all over him? She
had been making him crazy nipping at his ear telling him how cool he was. This
was AFTER he revealed he had been hiding he was the son of a Slayer. When had he
become such a prick? There was another good question.

His phone rang and he instantly had it to his ear.

"Faith!"

"Robin, it's your grandpa," the proper English voice had that obnoxious ring of
knowing what Robin would say next.

"You aren't my Grandfather, Alistair. The man who refuses to recognize you as
his father isn't even my real father," Robin sighed.

"But, you always seem to come to me and not him when you need help, Son. Who was
the one that made you the fierce man that the Slayer is with today, hmm?"

Alistair snipped. He sort of had an evil Yoda sounding voice.

"That would be Bernard- not you. He made sure I got of your little black magic
circle," Robin reminded.

"But, back you come and this time it's for love and not vengeance. It's a shame.
I am kind of partial to vengeance myself. It always seems to work out better,"

Alistair said.

"Could you just cut to the fine print, Alistair? I'm sure these roaming charges
are costing me an arm and a leg," Robin sighed.

"That IS more than what I'm asking for by doing you this favor. You have no idea
what you're asking! Retracting a Slayer demon is very intricate work. They used
to

do it in the old days for just a week to test the Slayer on her 18th birthday.
Those were the days, then the fairies decided it was safer to use drugs," he
sighed.

"I don't want Faith to no longer be the Slayer. Well, she wouldn't want to no
longer--- I just want the demon she got in that damned dimension out! I want her
to be

the Slayer like she was before. I just don't want shadowy demons coming out of
her and killing everything in sight including her...unless that vampire puts his
hands

on her! I'm sure he's just putting that thing back inside of her. I know it!"
Robin spat.

Sometimes you had to fight fire with fire. Whatever was going on with Spike and
Faith with the shadow demon and the healing had to be stopped. Spike was putting

something inside Faith, burning it into her. Robin had seen it. He was changing
her. THAT was why Robin shouted. Spike was putting himself into Faith, his
blood,

that fire stuff. Yeah, it was time to fight fire with fire.

"It doesn't work that way I'm afraid, Robin," Alistair tisked.

"I said I'd give you what you wanted. Maybe I couldn't stop Spike then, but I'll
stop him now...and I'll be taking something away from him for a change," Robin

sneered.

"What I wanted, yes, I can always use more 'good' souls back on my side, but
that wasn't what I was talking about. I meant that your little concubine
couldn't just go

back to being the Slayer she was. I can't just remove half a tumor and hope that
the cancer goes. I'm not God, dear boy...not yet. I have to take out the entire

demon-leaving her powerless, as a woman should be some might say. But, not me, I
say everyone should grab what power they can, as long as they don't take mine,

of course." Robin could hear his adoptive Grandfather grinning over the phone.
Probably stroking his white beard looking like a maniacal old Dr. Freud or thin

Santa.

"Faith would never agree to that," Robin sighed wearily.

Robin knew that she would probably give his life for him, but she would never
stop being the Slayer. He didn't want her to do both of those things like his
mother

had.

"Well, you could always tell her that we are just extracting the part of the
demon that she doesn't want, and then her no longer having any Slaying powers
was an

unforeseen side affect," Alistair suggested gently.

"Do you always have to remind me why Bernard stopped talking to you?" Robin
asked.

"This may be your only chance to save THIS Slayer that you love, my dear
grandson. You can't deny that is what you want. But, maybe it was just like the

vengeance you wanted against the vampire that killed your mother. You aren't
willing to go far enough to get what you really want," he told Robin.

"Bu-bye, Alistair," Robin sang obnoxiously and hung up. He continued to look for
his girlfriend with no luck.

Robin had been running on empty for a while when he finally just decided to do
it. He was going to ask the asshole to find her, and if he gave Robin any shit-
any shit

at all- Robin was going to stab the bastard in the face or punch him in it, or
do anything he could to that smug rat-face. If Spike refused to find Faith for
Robin then

Robin would threaten to tell Faith the truth. Spike had killed Robin's mother
and unless Spike found Faith for him with his big-ass English nose Robin would
out

Spike as the killer he was. He expected the vampire to pretend not to care, for
about a minute, but then he'd acquiesce. Robin had seen Faith play Spike like a

fiddle. She could get him to do anything, whether she realized it or not. Faith
claimed that Spike obeyed her due to Buffy's request. But Robin knew the vampire

didn't have that kind of attention span to obey some woman that had left town.
Consequences for Spike had to be more immediate.

Robin walked down the bar-district street of Sunnydale ruminating his usual
gripes. Why did Spike have to come back up? Why did he have to bring this God

forsaken town up with him? If only he and it had stayed down! Then Robin could
be living the high life. Maybe he would have even gone back to Beverly Hills and

been a principal there. Those guys make bank. He knew Faith would have loved
Beverly Hills, if just to make fun of the ridiculousness of the town. They would
have

the best time just making fun of how phony everyone was. Instead he was fucking
here, looking for her. She was so upset. It was so easy to fo how how sensitive
she

was. He had completely stopped teasing her about how her place was a mess or how
she wore only tank tops and jeans. She somehow thought that he was saying

she wasn't feminine enough or pretty enough or something. It was crazy. He tried
to imagine anyone mistaking Faith for anything but the most beautiful woman they

had ever seen. He hadn't meant to even closely imply that Faith looked bad with
blood in her hair, or that anything was her fault. What HAD he meant to do? What

had he done? He had gotten pissed off about Spike, and he had been mean. How did
the fucker manage to weave his way into every aspect of his life. How could

he have allowed that to happen? He hadn't.

Spike had been there before him, even though the night that he and Faith became
close Spike declared himself Faith's enemy for not taking orders from that
snippy bitch, Buffy. It seemed that Faith had always expected Spike would be a
rocky alley from day one,just as Faith expected that of Buffy Summers. Why did
she haveto except that? Why did she have to except blood in her hair and feeling
like less of a woman because she only bought tank tops and jeans for fighting?
Why did she have to be a Slayer now? The world was safe. Shit, there were two
souled vampires defending it. One of the vampires had professional fighters
calling him "boss"and a really nice car. There was also some witch coven for the
Cleveland Hellmouth. The world had enough players on its side. Things could be
different for Faith.

Robin broke into a run as he heard fighting in one of the alleys. Maybe it was
someone getting attacked by vampires. Gee, maybe it was a human asshole
attacking someone. He may be almost 34, but he was still in his prime and could
take on a few things.

He stopped dead in his tracks when he saw her with the two of them. Maybe it was
because he knew it would bother her so much that the thought- that white trash

bitch- came into his head. She did look dirty and a little bloody. She wasn't
even wearing shoes. She looked like she was having fun. But, she was still the
most

beautiful thing he'd ever seen.

"Switch!" she commanded and that half vampire kid bent down so Faith could flip
over his back. Robin wondered how long they had practiced that move. Didn't the

kid just get here? HE was there too. Spike. He knew when to duck so Faith could
hit the demon. Robin ran into help.

"I wouldn't," a voice said. He turned ready to swing at whoever it was.

"You!" Robin grumbled, "Shouldn't you be helping them. Isn't that your son in
there?"

The tall frat-boy just stood there. Maybe vampires with souls still had a
different idea of what friendship and family was, even if Faith insisted they
didn't.

"I can't always be there for him... and, he's holding his own," The frat-boy
sighed.

"Well, pardon me, while I go help my girlfriend," Robin grumbled.

"I wouldn't if I were you. You look spent. You might end up slowing them down
more," he said.

"You're not lookin' so chipper yourself, but I just figured the paleness was
natural. Is that why you hire people to do your fighting? Too spent, after what
a one hundred and thirty years of fighting?" Robin asked with a snort.

"No," the vampire laughed, "I probably would have killed all these guys already,
but it's good practice for my son. Since he insists on fighting...with Spike no
less. I'm more like two hundred and forty. Spike is about one thirty now though,
isn't he? Time flies when you can't be annoyed to death by someone."

"I thought you and Spike were practically brothers," Robin said.

"Not practically, no... A lot of people hate their brothers or whatever Spike
would be to me... Do I look like the kind of person that would spend a night
playing poker with him?" the vampire asked.

"I hate to see guys who abuse themselves. Stop hitting yourself, Mate," Spike
mocked a demon as he seemed to be hitting it with its own body parts. Not
attractive.

"Self-mutilators are tragic. We should help them out," Faith said as she sat on
one of the demons and ripped its leg off. The half vampire kid was laughing.

"No, I see you hanging out in more upscale places. Too bad my own girlfriend
seems to like to hout out in CBGBs. I was hoping she'd grow out of it soon. My
mother seemed to be getting sick of the whole punk rock scene by the time she
was Faith's age. Too bad Spike killed her before she got out of it," Robin said.


The fight was over. All the demons were dead. Faith was laughing.

"Maybe we really shouldn't have bothered Angel for this," Faith said.

She started to walk closer to Robin with Spike and the kid in tow. "I "I don't want them to see me. My son and I will only end up in a fight and Spike
will love that," the vampire whispered and ducked back into the shadows. Robin
decided that was probably true of him and Faith and followed the vampire. What
was she doing here fighting with Spike after running out on him like that? He
defiantly wanted to know the answer, but was just to exhausted to know it now,
with Spike's smirk in the way.

"I'm buying the first round," Spike said.

"I can't I have to get back and call Robin after my latest trip down psycho
lane," Faith laughed.

"That sounds like fun," Spike sighed. Everything had to be fun.

"Can't you just stay for one drink," the kid pleaded.

"I have no shoes. This place is a dive. There's glass on the floor," Faith
laughed. For someone that had been so upset an hour ago, she seemed so happy.
Happy with these two vampire-things.

"If those Thing-Like guys didn't hurt your feet I think you'll be okay," the kid
said.

"No, it's not sanitary," she smiled. Good. It was nice to know that some of his
concerns about germs and blood were rubbing off on her.

"Bloody hell!" Spike groaned, "Take my shoes. They'll feel just like home. We
both wear Docs."

"Your feet..." she looked down at his feet, "aren't that much bigger than mine.
But, they're still too big. What's up with that, though? You know what they say
about guys with small feet."

Robin and the other vampire actually smirked at each other.

"Yeah, they pack it all somewhere else," Spike smirked.

"That's not how I heard it," the kid laughed.

"You're just saying that because you have big feet, like your old man. But, you
do have bigger balls than him, not hiding behind magic."

Robin actually heard the frat boy vampire go into killing face.

"Sorry," he whispered and shook it off as Robin looked at him. He really did
seem like a way nicer guy than Spike.

Someone came out of the bar and Robin could hear "Rage Against the Machine"
playing.

"Oew, I love this song!" Faith gasped.

"Come say hello to Charlie... Gunn," Spike said to Faith.

"Okay, I know what to do," she said. She jumped on the kid's back.

"FUCK YOU I WON'T DO WHAT YOU TELL ME!" the kid and Faith were singing- or
shouting- along to the song in the bar as Spike held open the door and beamed.

"I told you bloody whiners all you needed was a dance," Spike beamed.

"I don't fucking get it!" Robin grumbled, "I'm a cool guy. I never had a problem
getting or keeping anyone. Why does Romeo in black jeans seem to make her forget
her problems with his little rat smirk and I pour my heart out to her and all I
get is grief?"

He felt guilty, talking this way. He knew Faith wasn't trying to betray him, but
he felt it all the same. He had just been dissed for his mother's murderer.

"Don't ask me," the vampire sighed, "I've had a soul for over a hundred years,
give or take some months, and Spike comes in with a soul for less than three and
HE'S the grand champion... Maybe I smoked and used peroxide my kid wouldn't
curse me out every time he talks to me,"

"Oh," Robin smiled, "Don't take it personal. I'm a Principal. That's how kids
seem to say 'Hello' these days."

"Tell me about it," he grumbled.

"But, you are just gonna let your son go in there with Spike." Robin said the
vampire.

"What can I do? He IS old enough to make his own decisions. All I can do is try
my hardest to stop him. Ancan can keep my eye on things and snap Spike like a
twig if he does ANYTHING to hurt him," he said.

Robin laughed. "Do you really think he'd hurt them? I mean this whole soul thing
is supposed to change everything, right? Why does it seem like it worked more on
you than on Punk boy?"

"Angel," An English accent called on the vampire's cell phone.

"Wes," the vampire answered.

"I have some good news and some bad," the English accent said.

"Just tell me," the vampire sighed and closed his eyes. What could be worse than
what just happened? Besides assassins they couldn't kill or someone being dead.
Okay, a lot could be worse.

"There's another group to worry about. They are like the Initiative, they're a
military group that seems to work somewhat independently from the government,"
The English voice said.

"The government? The government wants my girlfriend dead because of a misread
demon prophecy?" Robin demanded. He was becoming livid. Damn vampires mixing it
up with Slayers. Wasn't THIS vampire the reason for the whole prophecy in the
first place?

"It's not about Faith and Spike...Who is that?" the voice asked.

"Who is it about, Wes? Me?...I've handled this Initative before," the vampire
said. Well, it was nice to know other people had their problems too.

"It's about Connor, Angel. They want Connor. Since he's gotten his powers back
he's been seen and he's been recognized as the LA terrorist, and the group has
tracked him here to Sunnydale, I'm afraid," the voice told him.

"God Damn it!" the vampire roared.

He punched the store window that they had been hiding behind to spy on their kid
and their girlfriend so stealthily. The truth was Robin felt like he and the
vampire could have been standing there with sandwich boards and bells and Faith
and the kid wouldn't have noticed them. The rock people and Spike were too
exciting.

Robin had enough demon excitement to last him two lifetimes. But more was in his
face. The vampire had punched hole through the window and the store alarm was

ringing.

"Sorry...Sorry," the vampire yelled over the alarm as they both instinctive ran ran away.

"I-It's just, my kid. I pleaded with him to not make any extra waves. I just
wanted him to be safe. I gave everything for it. I even let him pal around
with---fu---Spike just because I figured if he insisted on this life ,being
allies with Spike would make it safer... But, after all I gave..."

"He's still not safe," Robin finished knowingly.

"No, he's not, and I have to make it so he is again. No one else can," he sighed
desperately, "Do you think you can give me a ride back to my hotel? I didn't
want Connor to spot my car."

End of Part 6- Scroll for 7 my loves ---->