Healing

Part 55

It had been several days since Angel and Wesley went back to LA and the Scooby gang was slowly coming back to themselves. Giles had spent the time worrying about what Spike was going to do to him - what Xander would allow him to do to get even - and trying to find the courage to tell Buffy how he felt about her. If Wesley was right, and she did love him as well, he didn't want to waste what time they could have together.

That was why he had asked her to meet with him tonight. He was going to take a page out of Rippers book and do what felt good for a change. He only hoped he didn't make a fool of himself.

Buffy was nervous on the way to Giles place. After the events of the past weeks she had finally come to understand how she felt about her watcher. She was in love with him - had been for a long time, she just hadn't realized it until everything in her life went crazy. Having Angel come back to town, finding out he was involved with Wesley, that the Powers had made removed the happiness clause from his curse, knowing that he chose to be with Wesley over her, it had all made her take a long, hard look at her life.

As with everything else, her first instinct had been to over react to the situation by being petty and immature. Calling Angel names and storming off in a huff had not been her finest hour, no doubt. Not that Giles had been a poster boy for maturity and restraint throughout the whole ordeal. Ripper had definitely come out to play on more than one occasion. Actually, she kinda liked that side of the normally stuffy man.

Buffy stood outside the door debating on whether she should knock or just walk in as was customary. Something about the way he had sounded on the phone made her think that this was more formal than a research session. She knocked.

Giles answered the door and looked at Buffy in confusion.

"You knocked?"

"Hey, I can do polite."

Giles chuckled and ushered her inside.

"Of course, I was just surprised is all. I think that's the first time you have ever knocked on my door when it wasn't locked."

Buffy shrugged her shoulders and smiled at him. She sat on the sofa and waited for Giles to join her. When he sat down next to her on the couch, rather than in the chair he usually occupied Buffy was surprised. When he took her hand in his she was shocked. When he lifted it to his lips and kissed it, she smiled and moved a little closer to him. Giles smiled back and then leaned down and kissed her.


Angel looked over at Wesley as the younger man once again seemed lost in thought. He knew that what happened in Sunnydale wasn't simply going to resolve itself. No matter how much he wished things could just go back to the way they had been, it wasn't going to happen.

Angelus had damaged their relationship, more so than even Angel had thought at first. Since they'd been home, Wesley had fallen into a state of depression, almost out brooding Angel himself. Even Cordelia had called him on it. When Angel tried to talk to him about it, Wesley would listen to what he said, but offered nothing in the way of explanation. In short it was driving him crazy. He better understood what his friends had been trying to tell him for years now, the broody thing was annoying.

"Wes, I'm worried about you. You've been quiet since we got home. Are you having second thoughts... about us? Do you want to stop..."

The words were barely out of Angel's mouth when Wes was out of his chair and standing in front of him. He placed his finger on Angel's lips, silencing what he was about to say.

"No. No second thoughts, I love you Angel. I've just been in mourning for something I can never have. I'm sorry, I hadn't meant to worry you."

The confusion must have been evident on his face for Wes took one look at Angel and began to explain.

"It all started when Xander told everyone about him and Spike. I was insanely jealous that he was so open about their relationship. And then when Angelus took over, Xander and Spike were both instrumental in getting the information we needed. Xander and I became friends."

Wesley took off his glasses and rubbed at his eyes before replacing them and continuing his explanation.

"It was Xander who made me aware of what Rupert was doing, making me doubt you, our relationship, getting me to voice my fears so that you would hear them. He's become a fine young man, and Spike is very lucky to have found him, or to have been found by him.

I guess, I'm jealous of what they have, the very fact that they have mated proves that Spike loves Xander, other wise it wouldn't be possible. I know that is something that we'll never have. Angelus hates me, and I feel no love for him either. Spike and Xander have eternity to be together where as I will grow old and die, and you will live on long after I'm gone. That is what I've been mourning, the chance we'll never have."

Angel pulled Wesley into his arms and held him. He kissed his head and rubbed soothing circles on his back.

"You're right, we won't have forever together, it isn't possible. But don't dwell on what we can't have, think about what we can. Shan-shu Wes, I'll get my redemption, become human again. We can be alive together, in the sunlight. Isn't that enough?"

Wesley looked up at Angel and smiled. It was more than enough.


Xander looked at the naked form of his sleeping lover. It was hard to believe that not so long ago this man - vampire, had been his bitter enemy. It just went to show that things changed, people changed. Him and Spike were living proof.

Xander walked to the end of the bed and bent down to lick Spike's foot. It was one of the few ticklish spots the vampire had. Spike wriggled his toes and moved his foot away from Xander’s mouth. Xander chuckled and repeated the act on Spike's other foot.

The vampire mumbled in his sleep and rolled over so he was lying on his back - which had been Xander’s goal all along. He crawled onto the foot of the bed and began softly rubbing his hands up the insides of Spikes legs. He grinned when the vampire spread himself wider in his sleep.

Soon, lips replaced hands and Xander kissed and licked his way up the silky white thighs until his face was between Spike's legs. He couldn't help but notice that Spike was awake now - he was hard. Xander nuzzled into the vampire's crotch, tonguing and licking his balls before sucking them one at a time into his mouth. Spike began to pant.

Xander felt Spike thread the fingers of one hand into his hair and tug ever so slightly. He smiled and moved up to do the vampire's bidding. He licked Spike's cock - once - from root to tip and then blew across the dampened head. Spike growled and thrust up involuntarily.

"Not nice to tease, luv."

Xander grinned and then bent back to his task. He slowly pulled Spike's foreskin back, revealing the smooth pink tip. He wrapped his lips around it and dipped his tongue into the slit, tasting the first drops of his lover's juices. He hummed in pleasure and Spike cried out.

"Xander! Bloody hell, do that again!"

Xander hummed again and then sucked Spike's shaft further into his mouth. He placed one hand on the vampire's hip to keep him still and slowly worked his throat open until he had swallowed Spike down to the root.

Spike's eyes rolled back in his head and he cried out again and again as Xander swallowed around the head of his cock. He knew he wasn't going to last as he felt his balls draw up and the tingle of impending orgasm started at the base of his spine. He tried to warn Xander, to tell him he was cumming, but when he opened his mouth, all the noise he was capable of making was an animalistic howl.

Xander heard his mate howl and seconds later his throat was flooded with the taste of Spike's juices. He swallowed and then let the softened member slip from his mouth before licking his lips.

"Mmm, nummy. Morning Spike. Sleep well?"

Xander smiled as Spike lifted his head, opened golden eyes and tried to focus on him before giving up and flopping back down to the mattress. He smiled again when Spike reached out for him and went willingly into his arms.

"What about you pet? You want me to take care of that?"

Spike gripped Xander’s obviously erect shaft and grinned when his mate groaned and thrust into his hand. Xander covered Spike's hand with his own and together they brought Xander to climax. Spike licked their fingers clean and then pulled Xander on top of him and held him close.

They drifted in and out of sleep for a few hours, both happy and content to just be here, alone and together. They had forever to do this, to hold and be held, to love and be loved in return. Spike lay in bed holding Xander in his arms and feeling like he was the luckiest demon to ever walk the earth.

He may have had to go through hell to get to where he was but it was worth it. In this case, the ends did justify the means. He wasn't back to his old self yet, but with Xander’s help he would be. Because of his this man, his mate, he was healing. Hell, he might even let the watcher off the hook.

THE END