A World of Their Own

Part 5

It had been two weeks. Two weeks since Buffy died saving the world. Two weeks since Xander and Spike disappeared into a portal. Two weeks since Anya had locked herself inside her and Xander’s apartment and refused to come out or let anyone in. Two weeks since Dawn had lost the only real family she had left in the world. Two weeks since Giles had been sober. He'd had crawled into a bottle scotch and hadn't come up for air once yet. Two weeks that Willow had spent every spare minute she had looking for a spell to bring Xander home.

It had been one week since the funeral. One week since Willow and Tara held a sobbing Dawn between them as she grieved. One week since they had finally tracked down Dawn's father and told him the news. One week since they learned that he would be arriving today to take Dawn back to L.A. with him. One week since they had contacted the council to come and take Giles home to England. They had sent a plane ticket; Giles would be leaving tomorrow.

Willow and Tara had done everything they could. They packed Giles’ things for him and arranged to have them sent overseas. They had helped Dawn to pack and to gather the things of Buffy's that she wanted to take with her. They had gone by Xander's apartment everyday and tried to get Anya to come out. She wouldn't, but sometimes she would talk to them through the door. She would ask if they'd found him yet. It broke Willow's heart every time she had to say no.

"Dawn, hurry up and get your things, sweetie. Your Dad will be here any minute." Willow tried her best to sound cheerful but she knew she was failing miserably. In one way, it would be a relief when Dawn was gone. She deserved a better life than she had here on the hellmouth. Also, everywhere she looked there were reminders of Buffy. On the other hand, Willow didn't want her to go. She was all they had left of Buffy, and Willow wanted to protect and care for her the way Buffy would have. In the end, the decision was taken from her when Hank Summers said he was coming back to take Dawn home with him.

"I'm coming. I just don't want to forget anything, you know?" Dawn was both happy and sad to be leaving. She remembered her father even though in truth she had never met the man. She remembered how much he loved her and the fun they had together before her parents split up. She wanted that, again - for real this time. But she would miss Willow and Tara so much. They had been so good to her; they treated her like she was more than just Buffy's little sister. When she talked, they actually listened to her. Just like Spike did.

That was another reason she was glad her Dad was coming. Spike and Xander were gone, and she felt like it was her fault. Willow and Tara told her it wasn't, but she didn't believe them - really. It was her blood that had opened the portal, her blood that had caused them to be sucked into some, most likely hellish dimension. Having to watch Willow frantically search for a way to bring them back tea tearing her up inside.

Willow pulled Dawn into her arms and held her. "Hey, don't worry, Tara and I will be here until school starts up in the fall. If you think of anything you forgot, just call us and we'll send it to you. Okay?" Dawn nodded her head and sniffled slightly. She could smell rosemary. Willow always smelled of rosemary, it made her smile.

Tara came in from the kitchen at that moment carrying a basket. "I made you something to eat on the drive. I, I hope it isn't too much?" Dawn took the basket from her and smiled. "I'm sure it'll be fine. Thank you." A lone tear slid down Tara's face and Dawn flew into her arms.

"Oh God, I'm going to miss you guys so much." Dawn sobbed against Tara's chest and she felt Willow come up behind her. By the time Hank showed up the three girls were clinging to each other and crying in earnest.

Reluctantly, Dawn pulled away and wiped her eyes with the back of her hand. "I, I guess this is goodbye then." Tara and Willow nodded solemnly, and Hank thanked them for being such loyal friends to Buffy and for taking such good care of Dawn. The girls promised to stay in touch and to call often. Then the car pulled away, and Willow and Tara watched it drive down the street until it was just a speck in the distance.

"Goddess, Tara. That was so hard. How are we ever going to get through this again tomorrow when Giles leaves?" Tara held Willow and did her best to comfort her lover. "I don't know sweetie, but we will. We have to."

The apartment was a mess. It looked as though a hurricane had torn through it. One had. Hurricane Anya to be precise. Clothes were scattered throughout the apartment, cupboards and drawers had been emptied of their contents, and the linen closet had been emptied from one end of the apartment to the other. And Anya still didn't have what she was looking for. She knew it wasn't here; he had it with himn hen he was sucked through the portal.

The ring. Her ring. Her engagement ring. The symbol of Xander's love for her. She wanted it. She needed to have it, to prove to herself that he had really asked her to marry him, that she had really said yes. She told him to give it to her when the world didn't end. Well, the world was still in one piece, and she wanted her ring.

She kept hoping that this would be the day Willow and Tara had good news when they stopped by, that this was the day they would tell her that they had found a way to bring him home. It never was. Every time she asked, the answer was the same. Which meant still no Xander and still no ring. Why had she told him to wait? She should have taken the ring. At least she would then have proof that it wasn't all a dream. That Xander really did love her enough to want to spend the rest of his life with her.

For a demon that had spent over a thousand years torturing and maiming men, that was a rare gift. One that had been cruelly taken from her by the fates. Well no more. She was Anyanka, damn it! She handed out the pain, she caused the universe to open up and suck people into oblivion, and she did not sit by and let the fates crap on her head. Not any more anyway. Xander was gone, the only good thing her humanity had given her had been savagely torn from her life and she would suffer for it no longer!

"D'Hoffryn! I call you. Hear my plea." There was a bright flash of light and then D'Hoffryn stood before her. He took in the mess surrounding her, the rumpled filthy clothing she wore, the unwashed state of her body and made a face of disgust. "Anyanka, what have you allowed yourself to become?"

"I want vengeance. I want the world to feel my pain. Take me back, please. I promise to do a good job for you from now on. Please, just take this pain away from me." Anya fell to her knees and sobbed brokenly into her hands. D'Hoffryn looked down at her with softened eyes. "Stand my child, all will be restored."

In an instant Anya was transformed once again into the demon Anyanka. All the humanity that had been thrust upon her had fled and she cried no more. She smiled beatifically at her mentor and they disappeared in flash of blue light.

Rupert Giles had many regrets in his life. He regretted his foolish youth and the repercussions it caused. He regretted never having children now that he knew what joy they could bring him. He regretted that he hadn't made the effort to understand his father better before he had passed away, and he regretted never telling Buffy how very much she meant to him.

His slayer was gone. He had failed her. In the end she had given her life to save the world. He always knew she had it in her, even when she was nothing more than a whiny sixteen-year-old girl who wanted to blow off her destiny for a date on Friday night. She had potential then, and he had done his best to bring it out of her, to mould her into the best slayer she could be. But somewhere along the lines, he fell in love with her. If he hadn't, if he had done what any other watcher would have done - destroyed the key, she would still be here and the world would still be spinning.

Not only did Buffy suffer for his ineptitude, but Xander had as well. Heavens knew where the boy had wound up and his only company was a chipped vampire that he could barely tolerate. Giles felt no remorse for the loss of the vampire, he was a demon after all - the thing he was trained to abhor, to help his slayer annihilate.

It was his love for Buffy that kept him from doing what he knew in his heart was the right thing. He allowed himself to believe that everything would work out, that no one would be hurt. He was wrong, and the world would pay for his mistake. That was why he had climbed into a bottle of scotch and hadn't looked back. He couldn't stand to look at himself or the children. Let Mr. Summers come and take Dawn to L.A. Let the girls ship him back to the Mother country. Nothing mattered anymore. His reason for living was buried in Restfield Cemetery.

~!~

It had been two days since Willow and Tara took Giles to the airport and said goodbye. He had managed to get on the plane without causing a scene. After the plane had taken off, they went back to the Summers’ house and began the unpleasant task of boxing up the rest of Buffy's things. In exchange for their work, Hank was letting them stay on in the house until they could get a dorm room come fall. Besides that, neither woman liked the idea of strangers going through Buffy's things; there would be a lot of things to explain.

Tara screamed when a bright light flashed in the room. Willow ran into the bedroom just in time to see Anya hand Tara a bunch of papers and a key ring. Then she disappeared again. "Baby? What's all that stuff?" Willow walked to her girlfriend who was still trembling slightly. The sight of Anya's demon face had startled her quite badly.

"I, I think it's the papers for the Magic Box, and some keys. She's a demon again isn't she?" Willow gathered her lover into her arms and rocked her gently. "Yeah, sweetie. She is." There really wasn't any more to say. Anya had obviously given up on Xander. She had made her choice. Willow would not follow her lead, however. She would find a way to bring Xander home if it was the last thing she ever did.

"Come on, let's take a break for a while, huh? I have some new spell books I want to look through." Tara nodded and allowed her girlfriend to lead her downstairs. They made a pot of tea and sat at the counter poring over the texts. She knew that if there were any way to get Xander and Spike back home, Willow would find it. Her determination was just one of the things she loved about her so much. Her compassion was another.