The Boarder

Chapter 5

Fastening the last button on his coat, he made his way downstairs. What happened last night with Buffy was wrong, and it only made things worse between Angel and Buffy. If only he had more will power. But the moment she stood before him nude, his only thought was how much he wanted her.

Last night, he thought Angel was going to hurt him as Buffy feared or throw him out of the house. When he kissed him instead, William was too stunned to move at first. But by the end of the kiss, William was feeling the beginnings of arousal. Later, when the sounds of Angel and Buffy's lovemaking finally died down, William was painfully hard.

Buffy had used him for comfort, but he was falling in love with her. Angel had kissed him, but he also shoved him away. William's mind was awash with confusion. He was jealous of them and the love they had for each other. They both teased him with tidbits of their love, gave him a little taste. William couldn't take it anymore.

Angel and Buffy were sitting next to each other on the sofa quietly talking when William entered the room. The two seemed so comfortable with each other, and William knew he was doing the right thing. Buffy's eyes widened when she turned to see William, causing his heart to jump. Angel was expressionless as he gazed at him.

"I behaved badly last night, and I apologize for taking advantage of you in your state, Mrs. Summers." William stared at the floor. "I will move out today, if possible."

"No need for that, William." Angel rose and walked towards him.

William glanced at the floor. "It will be better if I go. I'm going to look for a new place immediately."

Buffy rose, and her lip began to quiver. "Don't go. You didn't take advantage of me. I-" She looked at Angel and ran off, sobbing. William's heart broke hearing her cry.

"She's confused." Angel quietly watched Buffy as she sat on the other side of the room in a chair. "She spent the past five years with her life in order, and then someone came along and disrupted everything. It's hard to be attracted to someone when it's wrong. You're ashamed, because you don't want to be that kind of person, but the attraction consumes you. Then, when you finally give in, you feel guilt because you just hurt the person you've sworn to love forever."

"Are those your feelings as well?" William surprised himself by asking Angel such a bold question.

Angel sharply turned to peer into William's eyes. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"Why did you kiss me?" William asked quietly enough so Buffy couldn't hear him.

"It doesn't matter. You know it isn't right." Angel scratched the fabric on the back of a chair.

A pain shot through William's heart. Angel was attracted to him, but he wasn't going to act on it anymore. William told himself that he was leaving soon anyway.

Quiety, he said, "That's another reason I must go. We both might do something that we'd regret."

Angel didn't respond.

William walked towards the front door. "I'll pay you three months rent. That should give you enough time to aquire another tenant." He paused before the door. "I'll come back for my things after I've found a place to stay."

Mother nature it seemed, had different ideas about letting William go. Outside a snowstorm was blowing so hard, you couldn't see three feet from the door. William stood in shock as snow splattered over him. He was trapped.

Buffy immediately stood up. "You can't go out in that storm. Wait until it blows over."

"I guess we were too occupied to listen to the wind," Angel said woodenly as he walked over and closed the door. "Sit down."

William numbly sat on the sofa. His willpower was not going to withstand being there much longer.

Angel sat brooding on the armed chair. Buffy stroked Angel's arm in a comforting gesture, but he pushed her hand away. "Don't touch me," he growled.

"I thought we agreed to forgive and forget." Buffy's lower lip began to tremble when Angel turned away from her. She bolted into the kitchen, tears rolling down her face.

Angel looked at Buffy's retreating figure with a pained look on his face. "I'm being unfair."

"This will be mended more easily after I leave. My presence is just making things worse." William spoke quietly, afraid to anger Angel.

"You don't understand. I'm blaming her for causing you to leave." Angel's brown eyes avoided William's blue. "If you left, I don't know if I could take it."

"If I stayed, things would only get worse."

Angel sighed and leaned his head against the chair. "I don't see how. Everything is pretty bad right now."

William remained quiet. He had to leave. Being around Buffy after last night was hard. She was off limits now, as she should have been last night. But after having a taste of her, he knew what he was missing.

Being around Angel was also hard. Their developing feelings were wrong. Angel might try to deny them, but someday they would both act on them and Buffy would be hurt.

Buffy walked back into the room, and Angel held his arms open for her. With a sniff, Buffy ran into them. Just seeing Buffy and Angel together hurt. They were in love, and William felt left out.

* * *

The snow didn't let up all day. Angel was grateful for that, except that William had spent most of the day in his room. He should be glad that William was leaving. He found him in bed with his wife, but that's not what bothered him. Thoughts of him and the way he tasted consumed him, and it wasn't right. But there was a dull ache in his heart that worsened when he thought of William leaving.

William came downstairs at five while Buffy was cooking dinner. His eyes were puffy as if he'd been crying, but Angel didn't embarrass him by mentioning it. He wanted to know more about this man. Why did he come to America? Why was he living here, when he probably could afford a mansion on Fifth Avenue?

"Join us for dinner?" Angel indicated the table.

William nodded and sat down. Angel poured him a glass of wine and sipped his own.

"Did you get the job at the library?" Angel asked while sitting at the head of the table. He didn't want to talk about William leaving.

William sipped his wine. "I did. They were impressed."

"Why did you take a job?"

William smiled a little. "I wanted to be useful for once in my life."

"You weren't useful in England?" Angel frowned.

William became wistful, and murmured, "I was nothing, except to my mother."

"You really had no friends?"

William sadly looked at Angel. "I was in love with a girl. I thought she was different from the rest of them. Love is blind, I suppose." He paused. "One day I confronted her with my feelings, but she turned me down. She was embarrassed by my prattling poetry and declaration of love. I ended up running away and bawling like an infant."

"That's terrible!" Buffy said from the kitchen door. She walked to the table and placed down the food. "So, you came to America to get a fresh start?"

William bit his lower lip and turned his head away. "Actually, my mother had gotten really sick, so I spent most of my time taking care of her. When she passed on, there wasn't anything tying me to the city, so I came here."

Angel reached out and patted his hand.

Buffy gave William a soft smile and sat across from him. "I lost my mother right before I married Angel. My father might still be alive, but he left us when I was sixteen. I haven't heard from him since."

"I'm sorry." William turned sharply to look at her.

"It's okay. My mother was there for me when he left. Angel was there for me when my mother died." Buffy squeezed Angel's hand, causing his heart to jump.

William was quietly watching them. Angel gave him small, comforting smile, but William only looked away and started to eat. Was he upset about his mother or something else? Maybe he was regretting moving out. "Are you going to look for a new place tomorrow?" Angel asked nonchalantly.

Buffy looked up sharply at William. "Please tell us you're staying," she pleaded.

William paused with his fork lifted. He placed it down with a clink and took a deep breath. "I really have to go," he said with his eyes closed.

Angel tightened his hold on his own fork. A single tear rolled down Buffy's check, but she didn't make a sound. William was right. Leaving would be better in the long run. Buffy would get over him, and so would he. As he continued to eat, he told himself over and over that his feelings for William were wrong.

Buffy had gone to bed early, saying that she was tired. William, too, had turned in for the night. Angel sat by the fire in the living room and thought. What was it about William that caused him to think about him so much? He was shy and contemplative, but underneath all of that, Angel could see a very passionate man that wanted to come out. Angel wanted to see him free and burning with lust. Did Buffy get to see that last night?

Shaking off the desire that was growing inside him, Angel headed upstairs. This wasn't normal. He should only be thinking such thoughts about women. Pulling on his nightgown, Angel told himself that William said it was wrong, too. He crawled into bed and lightly stoked Buffy's clothed shoulder. She mumbled something and turned over, asleep.

William was leaving. Angel wasn't going to see him after tomorrow. He slowly got out of bed and made his way to the hallway. He just wanted to see him and talk to him.

Angel opened William's door a bit and peered in. William had a peaceful look on his face as he slept. Angel walked over and watched him sleep. The house was quiet, making it feel as if they were alone in the world. He reached down and stroked William's shoulder the same way he did Buffy's earlier.

William blinked open his eyes and peered at Angel. "What are you doing here?" Angel didn't say anything but continued to look at him. William sat up. "Is something wrong?"

He looked the same way he did when Angel found him with Buffy - hair rumpled and without glasses. Though, this time he wore a nightgown. William wet his upper lip with his tongue, and Angel felt himself grow hard.

He sat down on the bed. "Nothing's wrong. I just couldn't sleep."

William's eyes widened. "Oh."

"I can't stop thinking about you. Do you think about me?"

William's cheeks pinkened and he nodded. Neither of them made a move, until William touched Angel's cheek. "I can't help myself," he murmured.

Pushing away the last restraining thoughts, Angel plundered William's soft mouth with his own. He felt William's arms wrap around him, and Angel held on tightly himself. When William moaned, Angel took the opportunity to probe his mouth with his tongue. Soon, William was thrusting his own tongue back. His mouth felt like Buffy's, except for the stubble above his lip. He tasted differently, though. Where Buffy tasted like peppermint, William tasted like licorice. How could this be wrong?

He could feel the muscles in William's back contract and relax as William moved. His hands roamed to the rest of his back and over his arms. Digging his fingers in William's soft hair, Angel pulled him closer into the kiss. The only thought was how much he wanted this man.

Angel pushed William to a lying position, grinding his body against his. "Did Buffy put her mouth on you here?" Angel cupped William's hard length through his gown. When William shook his head, Angel asked. "Has anybody?"

"No," he rasped, eyes full of wonder.

Angel lifted the gown to expose more of William. He'd never seen another man hard before. It didn't look that different from Angel's own. It felt like Angel's, he thought as he ran his fingertips up and down it. Angel bent to lick the swelled head, tasting the salty substance that dewed on top.

"Oh!" William thrashed his head side to side.

Angel didn't know which aroused him more, the feel of him in his mouth or the sight of William enjoying it. He tried to mimic what he enjoyed Buffy doing to him. Buffy had to go by what Angel told her he liked. Since Angel knew what it felt like, he had a better idea of what to do. Angel felt William tighten, and knew he was close. He wanted to taste it, remembering the taste from Buffy.

"Angel!" William shouted, spilling into his mouth. Angel paused, reality sinking in. What did they just do?

Angel was soon pushed onto his back by a very passionate William. "Your turn." His earlier reservations quickly disappeared. Angel pulled him into another kiss. William broke away to kiss his neck, and continued to move downward. William began to pull Angel's nightgown up as Angel did earlier. Angel looked down to see William eagerly lick him. He closed his eyes, thinking that he wouldn't last long if he watched him. The warm, wet strokes were quickly bringing Angel to his peak on their own. When William put all of him in his mouth, Angel knew he was done for. Putting his fist in his mouth to muffle his cry, Angel found his release.

Angel felt relaxed and was about to fall asleep. William climbed up and put an arm around him.

"I love you," William said softly, closing his eyes.

Angel suddenly sat up. This wasn't supposed to be about love. Love would cause problems.

"I have to get back before Buffy wakes up." Angel hurried out of the bed and to the door. He refused to look William in the eye, knowing he wouldn't like what he saw.

TBC