The Silent Urge Series
folder
-Buffy the Vampire Slayer › Slash - Male/Male › Spike(William)/Xander
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
49
Views:
25,254
Reviews:
182
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
1
Category:
-Buffy the Vampire Slayer › Slash - Male/Male › Spike(William)/Xander
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
49
Views:
25,254
Reviews:
182
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
1
Disclaimer:
I do not own Buffy the Vampire Slayer (BtVS), nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.
49 - D: Flight
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Sorry, I'm stuck in Twilight Fandom.
Lots of thanks to Little_Tenshi for Angel's pov!!!
I'm sorry the formatting is so crappy. I haven't figured out how to italic something here.
___________________________________________________________
TSUS 49
~ Xander ~
What? Wait. “What?“ I turn to face Buffy. This is ridiculous. „You won’t let me go into what?!“
“A violent relationship.“
“A violent relationship? I don’t have a violent relationship with Spike!“
“You don’t? You were bitten and left bleeding!“
“And raped!“ Willow pipes up.
“Would you fucking shut it, Willow!“ God, I lost it in front of Willow. She shrinks back into herself. “I wasn’t raped! Everything was totally consensual!“
“But he hurt you!“
„He didn’t hurt me like in hurting me! I wanted him to do it, I wanted him to bite me!“ Oh very, smart. Maybe I should just give in and let them kill me.
“Xander, really I don’t want to say this but—“ Giles starts.
“If you don’t want to say it maybe you should just keep your trap shut?“ Spike breaks in.
“If you suffered under your father’s hand—“ Giles goes on, but Spike interrupts him again.
“If he suffered?!“
After a sidelong look at Spike, Giles continues speaking directly to me. “You suffered under your father’s hands and your psyche might be substituting pain for affection. You need close psychological attention to overcome such conditioning. I don’t think it’s healthy to let past experiences interfere with the decisions you make now.“
“You think I’m insane?!“ I think they might be insane!
“You can’t expect us to believe that you are in the right frame of mind after you said you wanted a vampire to bite you!“ Buffy says, nodding to Giles.
“You of all people, Buffy, should understand that biting is not always about killing or blood.“ Angel says and stands halfway in front of me while Spike pushes forward on the other side. They shield me from my friends without making me look weak.
~ Spike ~
Sire, Sire, Sire. You’ve got nerve.
Little Buffy flames up nicely, outside and inside. Hot girl she is, shy and aroused like that.
„That was different!“ Buffy finally gets out. „I saved your life!“
„Buffy assured me that the bite had been utterly painful to her.“ Oh, Daddy to the rescue.
„Buffy?“ Angel smiles one of those I-already-won-smiles.
„It was painful.“ Buffy pouts.
„Yeah, well at first, I admit that but-“ Xander breaks off when I stomp on his foot. Can’t he just once keep his mouth shut? „Ouch! What was that for!?“
„It doesn’t matter – I saved your life and, and as a Slayer my pain tolerance is way above the normal and…“
„Oh shut it. Getting off on being bitten has nothing to do with pain tolerance or your being a slayer. It just happens – get over it.“ I say and turn my back to them. Gotta check on Xander. Puppy takes everything too seriously. I wink at him and he smiles the too-shy-to-flirt-with-you-right-now-smile back. Adorable.
„I did it to save your life! You were my friend and I saved you. I just had to save you.“ Buffy’s voice sounds watery. Tears, Slayer? „And I have the same reasons now. Xander is my friend and I have to save him.“ I roll my eyes and Xander surpresses a giggle. I feel so comfortable with him, just standing there, not breaking eye contact. Intimate. Our own world within this one.
„Giles. NOW!“ Wait, what?
Angel goes down beside me, tackled by Riley and Giles. I’m about to turn around, but the Slayer’s hand is on my shoulder and the rest is P-A-I-N.
~ Angel ~
The attack comes as a surprise - even to me and my vampire senses - and I go down below the combined weight of Giles and Riley.
Out of the corner of my eye I can see Buffy appearing behind Spike and I roar, trying to shove the humans off of me without harming them - alright, without harming Giles too much. I don't care about Riley that much.
I watch - suddenly as if in slow motion - how Xander tries to tear Buffy and Spike apart. But through the un-life long bond that is our bloodline I can tell that it is already too late.
All I can do is watch while I throw Riley in the general direction of the stairs and grab Giles by the throat. Watch how Spike's - my Childe's - body starts to crumble and turns to ashes. The look on Xander's face is utter shock and disbelief as the ashes fall to the ground and the bloodline that was once Spike - William - goes quiet and still in my head.
Xander makes a noise - one I can only describe as despair - and drops to his knees. I shove Giles away and am forced to watch helplessly as all life drains from Xander's face and the spark that made him so unique leaves his eyes. The pulse in the bloodline that just started to establish itself grows weak again and just as suddenly goes out.
That's unexpected and too soon and I hear myself roar "XANDER!" before I even finish the boy's head lolls forward until his chin rests on his breast bone. Powerless his limbs sack to the ground. His heart slows, his breathing minimises. Xander's body drops and falls over into the ashes that used to be Spike. There was not even the beginning of a reflex to catch himself. He stops. He just stops. Unwillingly to go on for just a second longer.
I run to him and drag him up against my torso. He’s dead weight. „Xander! Xander!“ I call out to him and grab his chin, turn his head so that he has to look at me but his eyes, one open, one halfway closed, don’t focus on anything. Drool and blood runs down the hand I’m holding his chin with. He hasn’t even realized he bit through his lip. No pain awareness. Xander has completely withdrawn from reality.
Buffy, Willow and Giles just stare in the same horrible disbelief I am feeling right now.
Only Riley - I'm gonna kill him, I swear - throws himself at me again.
There's a sudden ... shift and Riley stops mid-air. He just hangs there, while everyone else is not even blinking anymore.
And neither am I. I'm frozen. Like time stopped without warning or reason.
"This is not going as planned." says a male voice and the Oracles step into my line of sight. I can feel my eyes widen, but I still can't move. Can't make any kind of noise.
"Oh really?" the female Oracle sounds a little sarcastic and the male blinks at her. I want to ask them what they are doing. I want to demand that they give Spike and Xander back. I want...
"This is not acceptable." sighs the male.
And just like that I'm standing next to Spike and Xander again. I blink.
„Giles. NOW!“ Wait, what?
*** *** ***
~ Angel ~
The attack comes as a surprise - even to me and my vampire senses - and I go down below the combined weight of Giles and Riley yelling for Spike to check „Behind you, Spike!“
Out of the corner of my eye I can see Buffy appearing behind Spike and I roar, trying to shove the humans off of me without harming them – too much.
I watch - suddenly as if in slow motion - how Xander shoves Spike to the side and Buffy sinks a stake into his chest.
I throw Riley into the general direction of the stairs not caring in the least where and how he lands. I shove Giles to the ground just as roughly and watch as Spike falls to his knees, holding Xander in his arms.
"Oh my god... Xander... I didn't... Oh my god..." Buffy slaps a hand over her mouth. „Get away from him!“ Spike yells and shoves Buffy aside.The bloodline that just started to form itself for Xander goes quiet and still and I can hear his heart stop. Just like that.
Spike roars - loud, helplessly, despairing - and Riley - I swear, I'm going to kill him - launches himself at me again.
There's a sudden ... shift and Riley stops mid-air. He just hangs there, while everyone else is not even blinking anymore.
And neither am I. I'm frozen. Like time stopped without warning or reason.
I'm starting to get the distant feeling of déja vu...
"THIS is not going as planned either." says a male voice and the Oracles step into my line of sight. I can feel my eyes widen, but I still can't move. Can't make any kind of noise. This feels uncomfortably familiar.
"Oh really?" the female Oracle sounds a little sarcastic and the male blinks at her. I want to ask them what they are doing. I want to demand they give Xander back. I want...
The male Oracle looks straight at me. "Could you TRY and get it RIGHT this time, maybe?"
And just like that I'm standing next to Spike and Xander again. I blink.
„Giles. NOW!“ Wait, what?
~ Xander ~
One moment Spike smirks at me and the next his eyes fly open in shock and his pupils fracture into yellow. He freezes, jaw clenching. Over his shoulder I see Buffy.
Too close. Slayer. Too close.
As if in slow-motion I grab both of their shoulders with one of my hands and pull them apart. Uncomprending I see Buffy’s hand closed around a stake that’s embedded deeply into Spike’s back.
The smell of burned flesh nearly makes me gag and under my hand Spike’s shoulder gets mushy. Flakes of ashes are in the air.
No. No. Nononononononooooooo…
There's a flash of light and the pictures I just saw in my head - and can I say GROSS here - are gone with the sudden roar coming from Angel, pretty much at the same time as Buffy shouts "Giles! NOW!"
Riley and Giles try to jump Angel, but get thrown around by Deadboy like rag-dolls. Giles crashes into Buffy, who was just trying to stake MY VAMPIRE!!!
The next thing I hear is Willow shrieking like a startled mouse and I'm hanging in mid-air over Angel's shoulder, who's running - no, scratch that - charging upstairs, a no less startled Spike under his other arm.
Did he just mutter "Bloody Oracles!" under his breath?
_______tbc___________
It's always a pleasure to write for you all. Thank you for reading and reviewing.
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+
Sorry, I'm stuck in Twilight Fandom.
Lots of thanks to Little_Tenshi for Angel's pov!!!
I'm sorry the formatting is so crappy. I haven't figured out how to italic something here.
___________________________________________________________
TSUS 49
~ Xander ~
What? Wait. “What?“ I turn to face Buffy. This is ridiculous. „You won’t let me go into what?!“
“A violent relationship.“
“A violent relationship? I don’t have a violent relationship with Spike!“
“You don’t? You were bitten and left bleeding!“
“And raped!“ Willow pipes up.
“Would you fucking shut it, Willow!“ God, I lost it in front of Willow. She shrinks back into herself. “I wasn’t raped! Everything was totally consensual!“
“But he hurt you!“
„He didn’t hurt me like in hurting me! I wanted him to do it, I wanted him to bite me!“ Oh very, smart. Maybe I should just give in and let them kill me.
“Xander, really I don’t want to say this but—“ Giles starts.
“If you don’t want to say it maybe you should just keep your trap shut?“ Spike breaks in.
“If you suffered under your father’s hand—“ Giles goes on, but Spike interrupts him again.
“If he suffered?!“
After a sidelong look at Spike, Giles continues speaking directly to me. “You suffered under your father’s hands and your psyche might be substituting pain for affection. You need close psychological attention to overcome such conditioning. I don’t think it’s healthy to let past experiences interfere with the decisions you make now.“
“You think I’m insane?!“ I think they might be insane!
“You can’t expect us to believe that you are in the right frame of mind after you said you wanted a vampire to bite you!“ Buffy says, nodding to Giles.
“You of all people, Buffy, should understand that biting is not always about killing or blood.“ Angel says and stands halfway in front of me while Spike pushes forward on the other side. They shield me from my friends without making me look weak.
~ Spike ~
Sire, Sire, Sire. You’ve got nerve.
Little Buffy flames up nicely, outside and inside. Hot girl she is, shy and aroused like that.
„That was different!“ Buffy finally gets out. „I saved your life!“
„Buffy assured me that the bite had been utterly painful to her.“ Oh, Daddy to the rescue.
„Buffy?“ Angel smiles one of those I-already-won-smiles.
„It was painful.“ Buffy pouts.
„Yeah, well at first, I admit that but-“ Xander breaks off when I stomp on his foot. Can’t he just once keep his mouth shut? „Ouch! What was that for!?“
„It doesn’t matter – I saved your life and, and as a Slayer my pain tolerance is way above the normal and…“
„Oh shut it. Getting off on being bitten has nothing to do with pain tolerance or your being a slayer. It just happens – get over it.“ I say and turn my back to them. Gotta check on Xander. Puppy takes everything too seriously. I wink at him and he smiles the too-shy-to-flirt-with-you-right-now-smile back. Adorable.
„I did it to save your life! You were my friend and I saved you. I just had to save you.“ Buffy’s voice sounds watery. Tears, Slayer? „And I have the same reasons now. Xander is my friend and I have to save him.“ I roll my eyes and Xander surpresses a giggle. I feel so comfortable with him, just standing there, not breaking eye contact. Intimate. Our own world within this one.
„Giles. NOW!“ Wait, what?
Angel goes down beside me, tackled by Riley and Giles. I’m about to turn around, but the Slayer’s hand is on my shoulder and the rest is P-A-I-N.
~ Angel ~
The attack comes as a surprise - even to me and my vampire senses - and I go down below the combined weight of Giles and Riley.
Out of the corner of my eye I can see Buffy appearing behind Spike and I roar, trying to shove the humans off of me without harming them - alright, without harming Giles too much. I don't care about Riley that much.
I watch - suddenly as if in slow motion - how Xander tries to tear Buffy and Spike apart. But through the un-life long bond that is our bloodline I can tell that it is already too late.
All I can do is watch while I throw Riley in the general direction of the stairs and grab Giles by the throat. Watch how Spike's - my Childe's - body starts to crumble and turns to ashes. The look on Xander's face is utter shock and disbelief as the ashes fall to the ground and the bloodline that was once Spike - William - goes quiet and still in my head.
Xander makes a noise - one I can only describe as despair - and drops to his knees. I shove Giles away and am forced to watch helplessly as all life drains from Xander's face and the spark that made him so unique leaves his eyes. The pulse in the bloodline that just started to establish itself grows weak again and just as suddenly goes out.
That's unexpected and too soon and I hear myself roar "XANDER!" before I even finish the boy's head lolls forward until his chin rests on his breast bone. Powerless his limbs sack to the ground. His heart slows, his breathing minimises. Xander's body drops and falls over into the ashes that used to be Spike. There was not even the beginning of a reflex to catch himself. He stops. He just stops. Unwillingly to go on for just a second longer.
I run to him and drag him up against my torso. He’s dead weight. „Xander! Xander!“ I call out to him and grab his chin, turn his head so that he has to look at me but his eyes, one open, one halfway closed, don’t focus on anything. Drool and blood runs down the hand I’m holding his chin with. He hasn’t even realized he bit through his lip. No pain awareness. Xander has completely withdrawn from reality.
Buffy, Willow and Giles just stare in the same horrible disbelief I am feeling right now.
Only Riley - I'm gonna kill him, I swear - throws himself at me again.
There's a sudden ... shift and Riley stops mid-air. He just hangs there, while everyone else is not even blinking anymore.
And neither am I. I'm frozen. Like time stopped without warning or reason.
"This is not going as planned." says a male voice and the Oracles step into my line of sight. I can feel my eyes widen, but I still can't move. Can't make any kind of noise.
"Oh really?" the female Oracle sounds a little sarcastic and the male blinks at her. I want to ask them what they are doing. I want to demand that they give Spike and Xander back. I want...
"This is not acceptable." sighs the male.
And just like that I'm standing next to Spike and Xander again. I blink.
„Giles. NOW!“ Wait, what?
*** *** ***
~ Angel ~
The attack comes as a surprise - even to me and my vampire senses - and I go down below the combined weight of Giles and Riley yelling for Spike to check „Behind you, Spike!“
Out of the corner of my eye I can see Buffy appearing behind Spike and I roar, trying to shove the humans off of me without harming them – too much.
I watch - suddenly as if in slow motion - how Xander shoves Spike to the side and Buffy sinks a stake into his chest.
I throw Riley into the general direction of the stairs not caring in the least where and how he lands. I shove Giles to the ground just as roughly and watch as Spike falls to his knees, holding Xander in his arms.
"Oh my god... Xander... I didn't... Oh my god..." Buffy slaps a hand over her mouth. „Get away from him!“ Spike yells and shoves Buffy aside.The bloodline that just started to form itself for Xander goes quiet and still and I can hear his heart stop. Just like that.
Spike roars - loud, helplessly, despairing - and Riley - I swear, I'm going to kill him - launches himself at me again.
There's a sudden ... shift and Riley stops mid-air. He just hangs there, while everyone else is not even blinking anymore.
And neither am I. I'm frozen. Like time stopped without warning or reason.
I'm starting to get the distant feeling of déja vu...
"THIS is not going as planned either." says a male voice and the Oracles step into my line of sight. I can feel my eyes widen, but I still can't move. Can't make any kind of noise. This feels uncomfortably familiar.
"Oh really?" the female Oracle sounds a little sarcastic and the male blinks at her. I want to ask them what they are doing. I want to demand they give Xander back. I want...
The male Oracle looks straight at me. "Could you TRY and get it RIGHT this time, maybe?"
And just like that I'm standing next to Spike and Xander again. I blink.
„Giles. NOW!“ Wait, what?
~ Xander ~
One moment Spike smirks at me and the next his eyes fly open in shock and his pupils fracture into yellow. He freezes, jaw clenching. Over his shoulder I see Buffy.
Too close. Slayer. Too close.
As if in slow-motion I grab both of their shoulders with one of my hands and pull them apart. Uncomprending I see Buffy’s hand closed around a stake that’s embedded deeply into Spike’s back.
The smell of burned flesh nearly makes me gag and under my hand Spike’s shoulder gets mushy. Flakes of ashes are in the air.
No. No. Nononononononooooooo…
There's a flash of light and the pictures I just saw in my head - and can I say GROSS here - are gone with the sudden roar coming from Angel, pretty much at the same time as Buffy shouts "Giles! NOW!"
Riley and Giles try to jump Angel, but get thrown around by Deadboy like rag-dolls. Giles crashes into Buffy, who was just trying to stake MY VAMPIRE!!!
The next thing I hear is Willow shrieking like a startled mouse and I'm hanging in mid-air over Angel's shoulder, who's running - no, scratch that - charging upstairs, a no less startled Spike under his other arm.
Did he just mutter "Bloody Oracles!" under his breath?
_______tbc___________
It's always a pleasure to write for you all. Thank you for reading and reviewing.
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