Deja Vu - the updates
folder
AtS AU/AR › Slash - Male/Male › Angel(us)/Spike(William)
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
52
Views:
4,136
Reviews:
2
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Category:
AtS AU/AR › Slash - Male/Male › Angel(us)/Spike(William)
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
52
Views:
4,136
Reviews:
2
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
I do not own Angel: The Series, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.
Chapter 108
Deja Vu
Pairing: Angel/Spike
Rating: NC17
Author: Jane Alexander
Disclaimer: No infringement of copyright is intended. The characters belong to Joss. I’m just borrowing them. I’ll try and return them undamaged, honest!
Document version: 1 April 2005
Feedback: janealexanderxxx@hotmail.com
Archived at: http://www.foreverfandom.net/viewstory.php?sid=4394
This story is AU and is a sequel to The Guy in Question.
Warning: includes character death.
Chapter 108
A clearing in the woods
**************
As they made their way toward the clearing up ahead, Spike reflected on the day’s events.
“What exactly did you see, when you read Angel?” he asked, turning to Lorne. “Summat you wanna tell me?”
“I wish there was, Spike. I wish there was,” Lorne sighed, “but I seem to have had the same problem as my counterpart. I couldn’t see anything beyond this dimension.”
They’d reached the clearing. By unspoken mutual consent they stopped to allow Fred and Wesley time to catch up.
“No kiss and everything going black then?”
“Not even that. I’m sorry, Sweetie, but I can’t tell you any more.”
“Do you mind if we stop for a moment?” Spike heard Fred ask.
He looked toward Fred in time to see Wesley spreading his jacket over a tree stump at the edge of the clearing so that she could sit down.
“You all right, Luv?” Spike asked, going over to where she sat.
She looked a bit pale.
“Would you like some water?” Wesley asked, opening his rucksack and handing her the bottle lodged inside.
“Thank you.”
“We have been walking for nearly two hours,” Wesley said, “and the terrain is far from ideal for anyone in Fred’s condition.”
“I’ll be okay,” Fred said. “My back aches a little but I’ll be fine…”
“Chocolate?” Wesley asked, delving into the rucksack once more.
“Mmm, thank you,” Fred said.
She took the bar of chocolate from Wesley - Cadbury’s Fruit and Nut - flinching as she stretched.
“I just need to sit down for a few minutes,” she said. “I think I’ve pulled a muscle.”
“Don’t worry, Luv,” Spike said, seeing Fred’s pained expression. “When you’re ready to get going again I’ll give you a piggyback.”
She broke off two squares of chocolate, popped one into her mouth and handed the rest of the bar back to Wesley.
“That won’t be necessary, thank you, Spike. I can carry Fred myself,” Wesley said.
Oops! Spike suppressed the urge to smile. Poor Wes, the soppy sod obviously wanted to play the hero.
“Very chivalrous of you, Pet, but with your weak back, likely as not, I’ll end up carrying the pair of you…”
Wesley returned the chocolate to the depths of his bag and fastened the strap.
“I can manage,” Wesley protested. “It’s not much further.”
“True, but it’s getting darker as we speak and neither you nor Fred are gonna be able to see where you’re going in a few minutes. You wouldn’t wanna trip and drop her, would you, Pet?”
“Very well,” Wesley reluctantly conceded.
“Er, guys? I’m right here,” Fred reminded them. “And I don’t need either of you to carry me but I would appreciate a guiding arm… or two.”
“Sure, Luv. Whatever works for you. Okay, Wes?”
Wesley nodded.
“I’ll just run along ahead and check on Angel,” Spike heard Lorne say to no one in particular. “He doesn’t know these woods like I do. We wouldn’t want him to take a wrong turn, would we? Ciao!”
Spike watched Lorne hurry across the clearing and out of sight.
****************
Without his mortal companions to slow him down, Angel had quickly reached the spot where they’d hidden the car. Everything appeared to be as they’d left it. He tossed the sword he was carrying into the trunk and got in the front to wait for the others. He was about to turn the radio on and then checked himself as he realised just how pointless it would be. He regretted not getting that CD player Spike had suggested.
He glanced back toward the woods. He’d half expected Spike to come running after him. No, who was he kidding. He hadn’t really expected it. It was more wishful thinking than anything. Spike didn’t care about him any more than the others did. The words Spike had whispered when they were making love weren’t meant for him. He’d been a fool to ever believe they were. No, he knew who Spike was thinking of and it wasn’t him…
****************
Lorne found Angel sitting his car, arms folded protectively across his chest, starring straight ahead. He gave no indication he was even aware of Lorne’s approach although Lorne didn’t doubt for one moment that Angel knew exactly who was sneaking up on him.
“Going my way, Handsome?” Lorne said, reaching the passenger door.
Angel shrugged. Okay, so he never was big on the small talk but this looked serious. His aura was even darker than usual. Spiked with purple too.
Lorne reached across to place a hand on Angel’s arm. The purple spikes flared momentarily and then subsided to be replaced by gold, streaked with red.
“Spike… Fred… Where are they? Has something happened?”
Angel started to get out of the car. Lorne gently held on to the arm.
“They’re fine, Angelcakes. No need to panic. Fred just needed to take a break. Spike didn’t want to leave her and Wes to fend for themselves, not with the sun going down, or he’d be here now instead of yours truly.”
Angel settled back into his seat and his aura began to stabilise.
“He loves you,” Lorne began. “You do know that, don’t you?”
The purple spikes flared again, this time tinged with blue.
“He loves HIM not me,” Angel replied.
“You’re wrong there, Honey. Yes, he loves the Angel we both knew but he loves you too. How could he not love you? You’re part of HIM. It’s killing Spike to see what you’re going through. Hey, it’s killing me too… If there was anything I could do, believe me I’d be doing it…”
“What can I do?” Angel asked, his voice full of despair. “Is it my destiny to die?”
“You can’t change the inevitable, Angel. None of us will live forever, not even you. I know it’s hard but you have to be strong for Spike. He’s lost you before and he knows he’ll lose you again and nothing can stop it from happening but if you spend all your time worrying about the things you can’t change you’ll miss the opportunity to change the things you can. Enjoy the time you have together, Poppet. Treat each day as if it were your last… Go to him…”
*****************
Angel realised he’d been so wrapped up in his own self-pity he’d failed to see that Spike was the one who’d actually be affected when it happened, whenever it happened. After all, he’d be gone. Spike would be the one who’d have to cope with the loss. He’d be the one to mourn…
God! How could he have been so selfish? He was going to leave Spike… again.
**************
Pairing: Angel/Spike
Rating: NC17
Author: Jane Alexander
Disclaimer: No infringement of copyright is intended. The characters belong to Joss. I’m just borrowing them. I’ll try and return them undamaged, honest!
Document version: 1 April 2005
Feedback: janealexanderxxx@hotmail.com
Archived at: http://www.foreverfandom.net/viewstory.php?sid=4394
This story is AU and is a sequel to The Guy in Question.
Warning: includes character death.
Chapter 108
A clearing in the woods
**************
As they made their way toward the clearing up ahead, Spike reflected on the day’s events.
“What exactly did you see, when you read Angel?” he asked, turning to Lorne. “Summat you wanna tell me?”
“I wish there was, Spike. I wish there was,” Lorne sighed, “but I seem to have had the same problem as my counterpart. I couldn’t see anything beyond this dimension.”
They’d reached the clearing. By unspoken mutual consent they stopped to allow Fred and Wesley time to catch up.
“No kiss and everything going black then?”
“Not even that. I’m sorry, Sweetie, but I can’t tell you any more.”
“Do you mind if we stop for a moment?” Spike heard Fred ask.
He looked toward Fred in time to see Wesley spreading his jacket over a tree stump at the edge of the clearing so that she could sit down.
“You all right, Luv?” Spike asked, going over to where she sat.
She looked a bit pale.
“Would you like some water?” Wesley asked, opening his rucksack and handing her the bottle lodged inside.
“Thank you.”
“We have been walking for nearly two hours,” Wesley said, “and the terrain is far from ideal for anyone in Fred’s condition.”
“I’ll be okay,” Fred said. “My back aches a little but I’ll be fine…”
“Chocolate?” Wesley asked, delving into the rucksack once more.
“Mmm, thank you,” Fred said.
She took the bar of chocolate from Wesley - Cadbury’s Fruit and Nut - flinching as she stretched.
“I just need to sit down for a few minutes,” she said. “I think I’ve pulled a muscle.”
“Don’t worry, Luv,” Spike said, seeing Fred’s pained expression. “When you’re ready to get going again I’ll give you a piggyback.”
She broke off two squares of chocolate, popped one into her mouth and handed the rest of the bar back to Wesley.
“That won’t be necessary, thank you, Spike. I can carry Fred myself,” Wesley said.
Oops! Spike suppressed the urge to smile. Poor Wes, the soppy sod obviously wanted to play the hero.
“Very chivalrous of you, Pet, but with your weak back, likely as not, I’ll end up carrying the pair of you…”
Wesley returned the chocolate to the depths of his bag and fastened the strap.
“I can manage,” Wesley protested. “It’s not much further.”
“True, but it’s getting darker as we speak and neither you nor Fred are gonna be able to see where you’re going in a few minutes. You wouldn’t wanna trip and drop her, would you, Pet?”
“Very well,” Wesley reluctantly conceded.
“Er, guys? I’m right here,” Fred reminded them. “And I don’t need either of you to carry me but I would appreciate a guiding arm… or two.”
“Sure, Luv. Whatever works for you. Okay, Wes?”
Wesley nodded.
“I’ll just run along ahead and check on Angel,” Spike heard Lorne say to no one in particular. “He doesn’t know these woods like I do. We wouldn’t want him to take a wrong turn, would we? Ciao!”
Spike watched Lorne hurry across the clearing and out of sight.
****************
Without his mortal companions to slow him down, Angel had quickly reached the spot where they’d hidden the car. Everything appeared to be as they’d left it. He tossed the sword he was carrying into the trunk and got in the front to wait for the others. He was about to turn the radio on and then checked himself as he realised just how pointless it would be. He regretted not getting that CD player Spike had suggested.
He glanced back toward the woods. He’d half expected Spike to come running after him. No, who was he kidding. He hadn’t really expected it. It was more wishful thinking than anything. Spike didn’t care about him any more than the others did. The words Spike had whispered when they were making love weren’t meant for him. He’d been a fool to ever believe they were. No, he knew who Spike was thinking of and it wasn’t him…
****************
Lorne found Angel sitting his car, arms folded protectively across his chest, starring straight ahead. He gave no indication he was even aware of Lorne’s approach although Lorne didn’t doubt for one moment that Angel knew exactly who was sneaking up on him.
“Going my way, Handsome?” Lorne said, reaching the passenger door.
Angel shrugged. Okay, so he never was big on the small talk but this looked serious. His aura was even darker than usual. Spiked with purple too.
Lorne reached across to place a hand on Angel’s arm. The purple spikes flared momentarily and then subsided to be replaced by gold, streaked with red.
“Spike… Fred… Where are they? Has something happened?”
Angel started to get out of the car. Lorne gently held on to the arm.
“They’re fine, Angelcakes. No need to panic. Fred just needed to take a break. Spike didn’t want to leave her and Wes to fend for themselves, not with the sun going down, or he’d be here now instead of yours truly.”
Angel settled back into his seat and his aura began to stabilise.
“He loves you,” Lorne began. “You do know that, don’t you?”
The purple spikes flared again, this time tinged with blue.
“He loves HIM not me,” Angel replied.
“You’re wrong there, Honey. Yes, he loves the Angel we both knew but he loves you too. How could he not love you? You’re part of HIM. It’s killing Spike to see what you’re going through. Hey, it’s killing me too… If there was anything I could do, believe me I’d be doing it…”
“What can I do?” Angel asked, his voice full of despair. “Is it my destiny to die?”
“You can’t change the inevitable, Angel. None of us will live forever, not even you. I know it’s hard but you have to be strong for Spike. He’s lost you before and he knows he’ll lose you again and nothing can stop it from happening but if you spend all your time worrying about the things you can’t change you’ll miss the opportunity to change the things you can. Enjoy the time you have together, Poppet. Treat each day as if it were your last… Go to him…”
*****************
Angel realised he’d been so wrapped up in his own self-pity he’d failed to see that Spike was the one who’d actually be affected when it happened, whenever it happened. After all, he’d be gone. Spike would be the one who’d have to cope with the loss. He’d be the one to mourn…
God! How could he have been so selfish? He was going to leave Spike… again.
**************