Chances Are

Part 4
Stutter

Willow nervously checked her appearance in the mirror for the last time. She
had finally decided on dark slacks with a pair of low-heeled shoes comfortable
for dancing in and a bright green tank top with a darker green wraparound over
it, allowing for freedom of movement. She had kept her makeup to a minimum and
wore only some amber fragrance and a simple necklace.

After checking her hair, Willow looked into her eyes and froze.

"What are you doing?" she asked. "This is crazy."

She headed for the phone, but as she touched the handset she shook her head
and paused.

"Who you gonna call?" she asked aloud.


Tara Maclay, a warm voice replayed in her mind. Willow remembered the
feel of Tara inside her mind. It made her wonder how Tara would feel inside
her body.

"Oh goddess," she moaned, the fantasy sending jolts of arousal through her
body. She shook her head and grabbed her coat off the bed, consciously not
looking at the Dingoes poster pinned to the wall.

---

Willow walked up the steps to Tara's dorm, the butterflies in her stomach
turning back into caterpillars, nauseating her even more. She paused at the door
and was rudely bumped aside by a muscular guy in an athletic jacket. She sent a
scolding frown in the jock's direction, but he ignored her.

"Jerk!" she called.

"Nerd!" the guy tossed back over his shoulder and that's when she belatedly
recognized the guy she had to tutor in high school.

A wave of depression washed over her. She was a nerd so why would
someone as special as Tara want to go out with her? After her
conversation-cum-argument with Xander today she'd realized some things she had
been ignoring. She and Oz were growing apart. In high school, they had a
lot in common, but even in a small university, they were starting to lose each
other. Her interest in magic and his interest in music were at two opposite ends
of the spectrum and while couples with different interests could maintain
healthy relationships, their common bond – school – was a source of contention
between them. Willow was, and always had been, driven to academic success; Oz
treated school as a way station to his musical career. However, Willow knew that
while he was good, success was a fickle lover in the music industry. Even if he
made it, he could become a has-been in a flash and without an education to fall
back on, Oz could find himself on hard times.

And as for their sex life, it seemed like it too was starting to fizzle out.
They hadn't made love for weeks now. Between Oz's practice sessions and classes
and her Wiccan group meetings and Scooby stuff, they hadn't had time to hook up.
And Willow didn't like sleeping over at the house Oz shared with his band
mates…with the exception of Oz's room, the place was none-too-clean and noisy
with odd folks coming in and out at all hours – definitely not conducive to
study or sleep or romance. Except for class, they rarely saw each other.

And lately, Oz was avoiding the Scooby meetings and patrols. The demons in
town were all wary of the commando group and while Oz was human most of the
time, he did turn into a demon three nights a month and common sense told him
that any group who could shove a behavior-modification chip in William the
Bloody's skull was best avoided. So he kept himself scarce and while they missed
him, the Slayer and her Scoobies understood.

Willow noted that Oz did try to make up for his absence in different ways. He
called her often and left her cute emails. He flirted with her, loving it when
she blushed and he was caring and attentive when they were together.

So Willow had no reason to question her relationship with Oz, content that
they could continue as they had and together make it over the rough patch. And
while she had privately recognized her attraction to girls for what it meant a
long time ago, she had never had any urge to act on that attraction – until now.

"Willow?" a familiar voice asked.

Willow looked up to see the door swinging behind Tara as the blonde walked
toward her. "Oh, hey," she said.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine," she answered, feeling lame, but noting how Tara's
appearance was causing her heart to race. Tara had on a long-sleeved tie-dyed
Henley and dark cargo pants along with her cute clunky boots. "Well, a little
chilly, but good for me I wore my coat."

Tara frowned. "I saw you come up the walk from my window, but when you didn't
knock I became worried."

"Oh," Willow said and bit her lip in chagrin. "Sorry."

"Come here," Tara said and gently pulled Willow away from the swinging door
and passing students. "What's wrong? You're all scattered."

"You can sense emotions?" Willow asked.

"Just y-yours," Tara replied and looked down at their joined hands. "Can't
you?"

Willow concentrated a moment and felt it. A low hum-buzz from Tara that she
recognized from their earlier encounter in the laundry room. Through the
connection, she could feel happiness, anticipation and stronger, worry.

"Yeah, I can," she said. "Wow."

"Are you okay?" Tara asked again.

"I'm fine," Willow said, realizing that all of her earlier worries were moot
now that Tara was here. Then she remembered. "Percy called me a nerd!"

"Who?"

"Some jerk jock I tutored in high school," she replied.

"You're n-not a nerd, Willow," Tara said.

"Darn tootin'," she said with an emphatic nod. "At least…not anymore."
Tara added, "And someone named Percy s-should not be calling anyone a nerd."

They stood looking at each other for a moment, Willow entranced by how Tara's
eyes glowed from the sodium-arc lights illuminating the sidewalk. Finally, she
asked, "Ready to go?"

Tara nodded, then pointed back toward the door. "I just need to get my
coat…it is a bit chilly. Wait here?"

Willow nodded and watched Tara rush away. She put her hands in the pockets of
her coat and bounced on her feet in anticipation.

---

The dance was held in a large community room in Turner Hall. A table was set
outside the open double doors. Willow recognized the girl who took her cash and
gave back change and two tickets.

"That'll get you a free soft drink inside. After that they're fifty cents a
can," Paula told Willow. "No booze…grrr."

"Thanks," Willow said. The two girls turned and as they went through the
doors, Willow handed Tara her ticket. "Did she just growl at me?" she whispered
to her companion.

Tara giggled and nodded. "She always does that, but only with people she
likes. So consider yourself special."

The community room reminded Willow of the Bronze on a weekend night, and with
the exception of a small group of guys hanging out near the DJ, the crowd
consisted of women of every age, type and style.

"Wow!" Willow exclaimed. "I didn't realize there were so many…" She paused as
she realized she was about to put her foot in her mouth.

Tara smirked. "Lesbians in Sunnydale?" she concluded.

"Yeah," Willow blushed but smiled at Tara. "But I didn't think the Lesbian
Alliance had so many members."

"Not everyone here belongs to the group," Tara explained. "Many p-people come
just to dance. A lot belong to the Gay/Straight Alliance, and those boys over
there are in the Gay Men's Chorus. They also sponsored the event.

"I heard them sing at Freshman Orientation…they're good," Willow said. "But
shouldn't there be more of them?"

Tara nodded. "M-most of the guys prefer to go to the club in t-town. You know
– The R-red Oyster? They like it more private."

"Yeah, I've heard of that place," Willow said. It was the only gay bar in
Sunnydale and the most popular after the Bronze. The gang had patrolled near it
during the summer of the missing Slayer. "More private?" Willow asked,
scrunching her face in confusion. She had assumed it was just like the Bronze –
only gayer.

"You've never been there?" Tara asked.

"Me!" Willow squeaked. "No…you?"

Tara shook her head. "Too s-shy to go," she said. "But Stefanie told me that
it has p-private rooms in the back. Not many w-women use them, but the boys do.
That's how it got its n-nickname."

"Nickname?"

"The B-big O," Tara said and blushed sweetly.

Willow giggled along with Tara and thought she had never seen anyone look
more adorable. Feeling bold she said, "Then maybe we'll go there someday soon."

Tara's blush deepened, but she smiled and nodded. "I'd…I'd like t-that," she
finally said.

Willow smiled back and as they headed for the drink table to get their free
cans of pop, Willow congratulated herself for successfully flirting with Tara.
When they moved over to sit at a table to take a drink, Mia came over to greet
them.

"Hey girls," she said. "Having fun?"

"We j-just got h-here," Tara said.

"But I'd say from the crowd, it's a roaring success," Willow put in.

"Yeah, things are a-hoppin'," the tall woman said looking around. Then she
looked back at them and Willow again got the feeling she was being appraised.
Finally, Mia nodded and said. "Tara, don't worry about your shift for the ticket
table, I'll get Stef to take care of it."

Tara looked surprised. "A-are you s-sure?"

"Yeah…you just have a good time," Mia said and smiled. "Later!"

Willow watched as Mia walked away. Then she turned to Tara and said, "I
didn't know you had to work tonight."

"Just volunteered to spend an hour at the table," Tara said. "I didn't
t-think you'd mind."

"Of course not," Willow said and then thought of something. "Tara, can I ask
you something?"

Tara paused a moment and then simply nodded.

"I noticed you seem to…" Willow paused and then continued. "You seem to
stutter more when other folks are around. Why is that?"

Tara was silent for a long moment and Willow was afraid she had insulted her
friend. "I'm sorry," Willow hastily interjected. "I really like your stutter and
it's really cute and I'm really sorry."

Tara smiled. "You think it's c-cute?" she asked.

Willow nodded. "Uh, yeah?" she said. "Kinda dorky, I know, but it's just…you
know, cute."

"Thank you," Tara said. "I stutter when I'm nervous," she admitted. "And I
get nervous around people, but I'm not as n-nervous around you."

Willow's chest filled with happiness. "Wow," she whispered. "That's great. I
mean, I'm comfortable around you, too."

"Good," Tara said. "Because, I think you're c-cute, too."

Willow looked into Tara's wonderful eyes and she opened her mouth to say
something, but for a moment was at a loss for words. Finally she asked, "Wanna
dance?"

Tara nodded and took Willow's hand as they walked toward the dance floor.
Willow marveled at the tingles running up her arm and down to her…


Oh boy, Rosenberg, she thought. You've got it bad!