Dark Soul

When they arrived in L.A. Xander decided that they should rent a motel room. It was nearly dawn and they needed a place to stay. The Desoto wasn't going to be adequate shelter for the day and he needed somewhere to think and plan out what exactly he needed to do next.

Eventually he found a motel that was broken down, dark, and dank. The sign out in front had three of the light bulb letters burnt out and it looked in need of some major work. But he figured it would be cheap, and that was good because right now he was a bit strapped for cash. He went up to the front to register holding Puppy up by his waist .Puppy in return leaned his whole weight against him and rested his head upon his shoulder. Xander still wasn't ready to relinquish full contact from the vampire since the incident with Warren.

The obese middle aged man in the front hadn't been too friendly. He made snide remarks under his breath about him and Puppy and made no attempt at being polite. The word ' queers ' had crossed his lips more than once followed by more obscenities. Thanks to vampire hearing Xander was able to hear it all. He had to remind himself that he still had a soul, else he might have snapped the man's neck.

Puppy was struggling to stand even with the support of a body to hold him up. So when they got the keys Xander made sure to pick Puppy up off his feet and carry him to the room.

The room they were staying in wasn't that impressive. It had been exactly what he expected – dark, cracked walls, and a single bed. The bathroom was small but he only needed the shower. He made sure to keep the lights off. Neither him or Puppy were used to well lit environments . Although he wouldn't figure this place for well lit. But it was all the better considering he wouldn't have wanted to get a better look at the ugly colored wall paper.

With a sigh he placed Puppy on the bed. " You OK," he asked as put Puppy's head on a pillow. Puppy nodded and stared at him intently, it was unnerving. " So you want to get some rest now or you want a shower first?"

Puppy just looked at him with big beautiful brown eyes and Xander couldn't help himself. He cupped Puppy's cheek and put his thumb on Puppy's lush bottom lip. Puppy was beautiful but Xander wasn't sure if he should push the vampire into anything. Puppy wasn't in the right mind, probably broken mentally by all the abuse he had suffered at the Master and Willow's hands.

"Puppy I would really like it if you talked more. Your not there anymore OK. I'd never hurt you. Your mine remember," he said the last word as he bent down and placed a small kiss on Puppy's lips. " I honestly don't know how you did it," he let the sentence linger for a while before continuing." You and me are the same, we both have soul's." The sentence wasn't meant to mean anything. It was just something that he had to say aloud to himself, making sure this wasn't just some weird dream that he'd wake up from. With a sigh he gave Puppy another kiss." But we can deal with that later. Shower time. Get up."

Puppy stiffened and Xander stared at him with concern. He didn't know why he was feeling this way for the vampire. It just didn't feel like the sort of thing he had with Willow. Yes he was protective of her, but she didn't need him. She was capable of fending for herself in less than a few weeks after she was turned. It didn't take her long to become his equal. He both loved and hated her for it at the same time.

As a human he had never had anyone be dependent on him. He always wanted to be the strong one. To take care and love someone with all he was. Something he never had with Willow, demon or human. Maybe that's why he felt so protective of Puppy. Puppy needed him and through that he could belong. He didn't belong in the human world because he was too much of a monster. Nor did he belong to the demon world because he was too human. But with Puppy maybe he had a shot at actually belonging.

Puppy stared at him for a moment before he spoke. " I-I-I can't stand," he said softly.

"Oh," Xander said in surprise . He had forgotten so quickly that Puppy still wasn't able to stand on his own. He felt dumb for being so forgetful but he had been distracted. " Well let's get up then. Put your arms around me." Puppy did as he was told and put his arms around Xander's neck. Xander picked him up and they headed toward the bathroom.

Even though the bathroom was relatively small, the shower was also a duel tub. Xander was relieved that he would be able to lay Puppy down as he cleaned him. Sitting Puppy on the toilet he slowly started to undress him. The older vampire had on slacks and a white long sleeve dress shirt. Most vampires Xander knew wore dark colors that melded easily in the shadows. Perhaps that's why Puppy had been dressed like this. To show him that he wasn't really a vampire anymore.

The first thing to go was Puppy's shirt. Xander took the time to notice that Puppy was very well built. He had a firm muscular shape and soft pale skin. This only reinforced his previous thoughts on Puppy being beautiful. But there were also bruises and burn marks all over Puppy's upper body. Xander growled at the sight of the blackened skin that he knew had been burned by Willow.

Slowly he traced lines around Puppy's chest - making sure he didn't touch any of the burnt or bruised skin. Puppy began to shiver under his touch. When Xander had looked up at Puppy's face he noticed that Puppy had his eyes tightly shut. With a sigh Xander decided that he should try and help comfort Puppy.

"What's wrong? Am I doing something wrong," he asked in a calm voice. He didn't want to scare Puppy. But it really hurt him that Puppy was so scared of touches.

"I-I," Puppy began to stutter and he seemed to be trying to shut his eyes tighter. "I-I," he couldn't get the words out now. Tears were falling down his face. Xander's immediate reaction was to wipe them away. Slowly he brushed the tears away with his thumbs and put his hands on either side of Puppy's face.

"Puppy look at me," he said. Puppy kept his eyes shut and Xander had to slowly run his right hand up and down his face to try and get him to relax. " Puppy look at me please." Puppy slowly opened his tear-filled eyes and stared into Xander's. " I think I know why your so afraid of me touching you." He let out a long sigh," Is it because your afraid that I'm lying? That I'm still trying to hurt you. I want you to be honest about this."

Puppy looked at him with a bit of fear, as if he answered wrong he'd be beaten. But soon he gave in and nodded his head before quickly looking down at the floor. Xander wanted to show him that he wasn't going to hurt him. He had thought that when he let Puppy taste his blood, his soul, that Puppy would follow him and trust him. But apparently Puppy was still under the impression that this wasn't real. Or maybe he just didn't believe that anyone could care about him. "Puppy you have to talk. I know it might seem hard but please just tell me what your thinking. Do you want anything?"

Puppy moved his head and stared at Xander's face. Their eyes met and they stayed that way for a minutes. Xander didn't want to break the silence or the eye contact. He figured that whatever Puppy was trying to find, he would find in his eyes. Puppy's eyes held so much – knowledge, wisdom, power, and sorrow. Puppy seemed to have so much depths and layers that Xander had to wonder what was left after all the beatings.

Soon the silence was broken and Puppy opened his mouth to speak. The words took a while to get out but soon Puppy was able to talk. " N-no one has ever taken care of me before," Puppy said with a little strain in his voice. It wasn't really an answer, but there was no pressure to continue.

Xander's heart sunk in his chest. This is what he wanted. Puppy really did need him, more than anything. He closed his eyes and placed his forehead against Puppy's. " Puppy I told you as long as your with me I'll protect you. And as long as your with me I'll always take care of you. Your all I have now, and maybe that's all I really need," he said as he lent down and placed another small kiss on Puppy's lips. He wasn't really sure why he said that. Maybe if he could make this right then Puppy would be all he needed. His world. Someone who he could take care of and maybe find some purpose. Although he knew it wasn't going to be that easy, he couldn't just force himself on Puppy. Thing's had to go slowly. Puppy needed to trust him.

"Alright let's take a shower."

He moved from Puppy's side and over to the shower. Xander didn't know if Puppy would mind it being hot. He had always liked the water to be overly hot. Not scolding but a little hotter than most humans preferred. Mostly because it helped warm his skin and the contrast between the hot water and cold skin made it feel like heaven. So he turned it on the way he liked figuring that Puppy would enjoy it.

He turned around and looked at Puppy who was still staring at nothing. Even though he had never expected Puppy to just be healed right away, it still hurt that he couldn't do anything for him at the moment. This was going to take time and hopefully Puppy would return to the vampire he was before he became Puppy.

"Alright you ready," he said trying to snap Puppy out of his thoughts. Puppy slowly turned his head and stared at him. He nodded slightly and Xander picked Puppy's arms up indicating that he wanted Puppy to hold on to him again. When Puppy wrapped his arms around him, Xander lifted Puppy up and removed his slacks.

Puppy was very tense when Xander placed him in the shower. Xander really didn't know if Puppy had ever had a bath since his imprisonment. The only thing Puppy ever smelled of was blood and anguish. Something that refused to remove it's self from Xander's memories. All the anguish that came from Puppy flowed threw his being when he got that vision back in the factory.

Xander took off his leather jacket and his white shirt he wore underneath – naked from the waist up. At first he had planned to take a shower with Puppy, but then he decided against it because he didn't want to make thing's uncomfortable. There was a rag and some towels on a rack which he grabbed. He knelt down outside the shower and placed the towels at his side with the rag in his right hand. Then he grabbed a bar of soap and scrubbed it into the rag, making sure the rag had as much soap as possible on it.

Placing the bar of soap aside he began rubbing the rag along Puppy's chest. The immediate reaction from Puppy was to try and back away from the touch. So far the vampire had flinched or backed away from every touch Xander had offered to him. All except caresses.

"Puppy tell me what you want? Do you want to do this by yourself? I can leave it's not important," he said with a hint of disappointment. Xander wanted Puppy to want him. Knowing Puppy needed him still wasn't enough. Puppy had to want him. Perhaps it was his vampire nature that caused him to be so possessive, but he really didn't want to force the vampire to want him.

Slowly he began to retract his hand as he got up. But before he could completely pull away Puppy's hand shot out and grabbed a hold of his wrist. "Please," Puppy asked. "Don't go. I just....." He didn't get the rest of it out, so Xander just put his his hand back on Puppy's chest and slowly began to rub the rag in small lazy circles. It wasn't meant to be anything more than a soothing rub, but it elicited different reactions from Puppy.

Xander peaked down Puppy's body and noticed that his penis began to become erect. Puppy was a very gifted creature, his penis had to be at least eleven inches fully erect. Not knowing exactly what to do Xander reached his free hand down Puppy's body and slowly began to stroke his the half erect cock to full hardness. Puppy shut his eyes and began to moan.

"Do you like that? Do you want me keep this up," he whispered as he leaned over the edge of the tub and placed soft kisses on Puppy's neck. When Puppy moaned loudly Xander took that as a hint that he liked it. So he stroked Puppy's cock faster trying to please the elder vampire best he could.

Puppy was moaning and panting. He began to thrust into Xander's hand trying to find sweet release. Xander moved his head from Puppy's neck and slowly moved down to his chest, taking one of Puppy's brown nipples into his mouth swirling his tongue in slow circles.

He lingered on the nipple before moving down further and tracing small kisses up and down Puppy's well defined abs. Then he took his hand with the rag and slowly began to rub small circles over Puppy's nipples. "Your so fucking beautiful Puppy. All mine," he whispered before darting his tongue into Puppy's navel.

Xander was lost. Was this too far? Was Puppy ready for something like this? He didn't know but he couldn't stop himself from taking what he wanted. Never did he once have to hold back, and right then he couldn't.

Without thinking he took his hand off of Puppy's erection and slid his fingers down Puppy's balls and into the crack of his ass. His finger's massaged slow circles over the soft pink hole and Xander couldn't help but moan at the though of his finger's entering Puppy.

But he hadn't noticed Puppy's reaction to what he was doing. The body underneath him had stiffened. When the finger's had gone over Puppy's hole, Puppy began to growl.

Without warning Xander was thrown off as Puppy raised a fist and punched him. Xander was more stunned than hurt. He jumped up and snarled in anger." What the hell was that for," he yelled as he vamped out and stared at Puppy.

Puppy looked at him with fear in his eyes. Then he curled himself up into a ball and buried his face in his legs. "Please. Please I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. Please. Please. Please," he chanted over and over. He was crying and he couldn't stop. " I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I won't do it anymore. You can, you can..... Please don't, no more please," he pleaded with the younger vampire.

Xander's face shifted back to human guise and he quickly moved into the shower and grabbed hold of Puppy. Putting his arms tightly around the older vampire he rocked him back and forth trying to comfort him. " It's OK Puppy. I should be the one to apologies. I didn't think about what I was doing. I should have known you weren't ready for anything yet. I'm sorry I didn't mean to."

Puppy acted like he hadn't heard a single word that Xander hand said. He just rocked back and forth and closed himself off. "No more. No more. I promised I'd be good. No more. No more. Please don't punish me."

Xander had no idea how to calm the older vampire. Puppy was just so..Broken? He didn't have the right word but Puppy was just lost to him. With everything Puppy had been through Xander really couldn't bring himself to blame him. All he could do was offer Puppy the only thing he could.

"Shh. No need for tears." Pulling his right arm from Puppy he put his wrist to his mouth and bit into it, making a huge wound. There needed to be lots of blood. Puppy had not fed in so long, and seeing as how the blood calmed him in the cell Xander decided that the blood would also calm him now.

He placed his wrists at Puppy's mouth pushed it to the vampires lips. "Drink as much as you like." Puppy hesitated before gulping down on the red blood that flowed from Xander's wrists.

Soon Xander was feeling light headed. Even vampires could pass out from enough blood loss. But he couldn't take his wrists away. At least not until Puppy had calmed.

He thought he was going to pass out when he noticed that the blood no longer was being drawn from his wrists. Looking down he saw Puppy in the most peaceful pose he'd ever seen the vampire in. Deep sleep with his head nestled against Xander's arm.

Leaning down he placed a soft kiss in the dark thick hair. Then he swooped the elder vampire in his arms and walked out of the bathroom. Noticing that he and Puppy were still soaked he placed Puppy on the bed and went to the bathroom to grab some towel's and turn the shower off. When he entered the room he dried Puppy off and tucked him into bed.

Dawn was fast approaching and he had wanted to go out and gather some information about the local demon population before Puppy got up. But there was no way he'd be able to gather the information he needed and get back before dawn. So he decided that he'd spend the day in the room, with Puppy.

He took off the remainder of his cloths and threw them unto the floor. Making sure he dried himself off first he climbed into the single mattress and made himself comfortable under the covers. He wrapped himself around Puppy and held him close. Placing kisses on top of Puppy's head he slowly drifted off into sleep. If Puppy woke and needed comfort Xander wanted to be there and offer it. If Puppy needed every last drop of his blood, Xander would give it.

TBC