Brave New World

Chapter 4

Merrick slowly stirred to consciousness and let out a groan. He raised his hands to his head and let out a hiss of pain when he touched a gash on the side of his head. He pulled his hand away and look at his fingers. Not seeing any blood, he guessed that he must have been unconscious for several hours. **Was I mugged?** he thought to himself. He then began to look around and wondered where he was. **A jail?** he thought when he saw the bars. **Why would I be in a jail cell? I didn't do anything wrong. I was attacked. I was...** he froze as he caught sight of the shape of someone huddled in a corner. He struggled to sit up, gasping at the sharp stabs of pain from the right side of his ribs and his back. As the pain eased, he looked across the cell at the figure again.

From the length of hair, he guessed the person was a woman. She was dressed in what might once have been military fatigues but now was more like rags. From the rips and holes and stains that looked a lot like dried blood, he thought she must have been in some sort of a brawl. She was crouched down on the floor, her head and shoulders slumped forward with her hands covering her face as if to hide herself. He then noticed that she was in shackles that were attached to a chain from the wall where he was also trembling.

"He-, Hello? Excuse me, Miss?" he asked as gently as possible.

Slowly, the woman lowered her hands and raised her head to look at him.

"Buffy," Merrick gasped. "Dear God child, are you OK? What are you doing here?" Pausing as he looked around, he added, "For that matter, where is 'here'?" Merrick rose unsteadily to his feet and started to walk over to Buffy, but he stopped as she raised a hand to wave him off. "What happen, child?" his voice almost a whisper.

"The Master," she replied, her voice quivering. Merrick paused as memories began to come back. Sunnydale. They were in Sunnydale. **Oh God, the prophecy.**

Merrick had been out of town, while Buffy and his assistant had remained in Cleveland, searching through various ancient texts for prophecies. Buffy had been bored, hating "book worming duty" as she called it, and she tended to take her frustration out on Wesley. When a call for the Slayer had come in from Sunnydale, Wesley had sent her off immediately. Merrick had been so angry when he had learned that the fool had passed *that* message on to his Slayer. He knew that Wesley Wyndham-Price had been confused by his tirade, but he hadn't cared because Buffy was going to Sunnydale. And Merrick knew that should she go there, it would be inevitable that she would learn about the Master, and would go to face him.

He moved again towards Buffy. "We have to get you out of here, Buffy. Before he kills you."
"It's too late," Buffy murmured.

"No. No it's not too late. We just have to get you out of those manacles." He squatted down in front of her, and reached for her hands.

"Don't," she cried out in alarm, startling him as she pulled away. She was frightened of what his reaction would be when he discovered her secret. Backing away from him, she whimpered as her injured back rubbed against the stone behind her.

"Buffy, what is wrong? Please, let me help." He could see she was in a tremendous pain, and his concern for mar made him press on in spite of her reluctance to allow him to touch her. He rose up.

"Can you stand, child?" As he bent over to help her up, a small crucifix tumbled out from under his shirt. The cross swung onto her brow, touching her just below the hairline, and burned her. Buffy flinched back away from the cross and hissed in pain. Her vampire face emerged as she lost control of herself.

Marrick jerked away in surprise and shock. He stared in horror at Buffy's features, \God.God. They turned you." His voice was barely a whisper.

"I told you it was to late," she sobbed and then fell back against the wall, her head in her hands, sobbing in despair. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry..."

Merrick stumbled backwards in shock until he was against the far wall, then slid down to the floor. He sat there and simply stared at her. In spite of his shock, his mind was racing, as memories began to rise connections were suddenly made.

**She didn't attack me,** he thought. **She's actually ashamed of being a vampire. She cares about what I think of her. How can she...?** Suddenly he remembered a brief conversation he had had once with Carter Ramsey, the Records librarian at the Watcher's Council House. The old man had been talking about some records he had come across that indicated the possibility of a turned Slayer continuing to fight against the vampires. The entry had not provided much information, apparently she had been staked shortly afterwards while fighting the vampire master who had turned her. While the account raised questions, it was generally dismissed as mistaken information that had been given to the scribe who had written the entry down. Especially since the idea that someone would have made such an entry falsely was unthinkable. **But if it were true...** Merrick's eyes widen in amazement, **Buffy might still have her soul!**

Slowly, he began to arrive at some conclusions and not all of them were pleasant. In fact, when contemplating what he had been told by Rupert Giles, Merrick was beginning to have a nasty feeling that he had really messed things up. **No. That's too light a term for what I've done. I've betrayed the world. Not to mention Buffy.** He rose back to his feet, removed the crucifix from around his neck, and dropped it to the floor. Buffy looked up in confusion at the sound of the cross hitting the floor, and was even more surprised when Merrick stepped over towards her and then squatted down in front of her.

"Merrick," Buffy queried, "why aren't you trying to stake me. I'm a monster now. A vampire. Just like those you taught me to kill. But you're not. Why?"

"Why aren't you trying to feed on me?" he asked, tossing her own question back at her. "For that matter, why do they have you in chains here with me?"

Buffy grimaced and then said, "I'm supposed to be duping you into releasing me by pretending to still be alive. The Master left the key over on that table. It's just a god damn game to those bastards."
"But not to you, right? You still value life, don't you? You don't want to kill me, do you child?" he said looking straight into her eyes.

"Don't," she said sharply hold up her hand.

"Merrick, could you please not call me that anymore? I know you've called me that since I was 13, I've always liked it before. Made me feel close to you, like I was your daughter. Especially after my parents were . . . But, he calls me that now . . . and I don't really like the sound of it much, anymore." "It's O.K. It really isn't correct anymore, anyway," he said soothingly. "You're a grown woman-"

"I'm a fucking, walking corpse, Merrick," she interrupted harshly. "A vampire. I've got a demon in me that is screaming for your blood. I can smell it. No, Merrick, I don't *want* to kill you. I don't want to hurt any human. Even Wesley" she added with a slight grin. Then she looked down, "but I'm still a monster."

"The hell you are," Merrick said firmly. She looked back up at him, surprised at the sound of anger in his voice. He grabbed the key from the table, then moved back in front of her and unlocked the manacles. "You are a miracle, Buffy Summers. You have somehow managed to keep your soul. As a former slayer, you might have become something that . . . that might have overwhelmed the world and destroyed humanity. Yes, I know things have been looking pretty grim and dark for the world for the past few years. But we haven't lost yet. Even as a vampire, you can still fight the darkness if you still care. Because so long as there are people who care, there is still hope for the world."

"I may still have my soul, Merrick," Buffy remarked. "But I'm not the same person I was. I'm not the slayer anymore . . . my strength is gone . . . I . . . I'm weak. And I don't think I'm going to be much use . . . At first, when I realized that I was different, that I still had my soul . . . I had some idea that maybe uld uld get revenge . . . but now. . . I . . . I never thought I could ever be as frighten as I have been over the last few days. I thought . . . Oh God, I was so stupid . . . I thought that if I pretended to be crazy, they would lose interest in me, they wouldn't think I was worth any attention. But I was so wrong. The Master seems to be personally offended that I am not Buffy the Super-Vamp, and as for Willow . . . I killed her mate before I got caught . . . she wants revenge. Merrick, I don't think I can make it."
"Of course you will make it," said Merrick. "You will just have to give it time. You're a new vampire, it is only to be expected that you would not be at full strength. You've kept your head. Hidden what you are from them. Yes, you have suffered greatly, child, and I can in no way express my sorrow for what has happened to you or what will happen. But you must continue."

"I can't Merrick," Buffy started to sob again.

"Don't you understand why they stuck you in here? They expect me to kill you. It's a test for me. He's raped me, killed me, vamped me, beaten me. Now he wants me to kill you. My former Watcher. The most important person in the world to me. I can't do that." "Yes you can. You can do it because I was dead the minute I was captured. You can do it because if you don't, then most certainly one of them will. And if my death can have some meaning by helping save you, then I freely, willingly give my life to you. Finally, you can do it because. . .," he paused, reluctant to tell her anything that would cause her more pain, but she deserved to know the truth before he died. "Because, I think that I am responsible for the world being in as much trouble as it is, and therefore I am also responsible for your being a vampire."

"Ego much Merrick," Buffy said with a harsh, bitter chuckle. "I was the idiot who decided to go face the Master on my own. I was the fool who rushed into battle despite the warnings from Jeeves."

"Jeeves?" asked Merrick.

"The local watcher's council rep here. Nervous Brit, kept going on about a demon who made wishes come true, said he was supposed to have been my Watcher," scoffed Buffy.

"Giles," corrected Merrick absentmindedly, "and he may have been right. I'm afraid I owe him an apology that I will never be able to give him. And no, Buffy, I am not being egotistical. Rupert Giles said that he had received information that you were supposed to be here in Sunnydale-"

"-and that the world was better, yadda, yadda, yadda," interrupted Buffy. " I know. I heard the fairy tale. I didn't believe it then. I don't now."

"You should. It is entirely possible that he was correct, Buffy," he countered.

Buffy stared at the set look on his face. "Your serious."

Merrick sighed. "I have always tried to be faithful in my duty to you, as your Watcher. But because I loved you as if you were my own daughter, I fear that I have been duped into betraying everything I swore to protect."

Merrick began to tell her how, years ago he had begun receiving information from a mysterious woman, who claimed to see visions of the future. At first he had been suspicious of her, but her information had always turned out to be useful and accurate. The woman had led him to Buffy when she was 13 and had told him that she would become a slayer. Trusting her warnings, he had kept a careful watch on Buffy, and so he was nearby when the vampires attacked. Her parents were killed immediately, but she had managed to hold off the two vampires long enough so that Merrick could shoot each of them with a crossbow. He could see right then, the great potential she had as a future Slayer. He had used his influence on the council to make arrangements for him to become her guardian and had begun training her. At 15, she became the Slayer. When she achieved first victory just weeks later, destroying Lothos and his clan, he had been so proud of her. But then the woman had returned, and what she had brought him this time filled him with doubt and worry for the first time in a long time. All due to one book.

The Pergamon Codex.

It had been lost for decades, maybe even centuries. But she had found it, brought it to him, and shown him *The Prophecy *. It had been unusually straightforward. The Master would rise and he would kill the Slayer. Merrick had been horrified. He refused to accept that Buffy might be taken from him so soon. Then the woman suggested a way to avoid it. Keep the Slayer out of Sunnydale and away from the Master. And then she had left again, and he had never seen her since. He justified it as part of his duty to protect Buffy. He also rationalized that since there were vampires everywhere he could be excused for taking the Slayer to another city, after all, the people she defended in that city were just as important as the people in Sunnydale. At least this way she could still continue to fight. And the world had so needed a trained and experienced Slayer these last two years. Suddenly, it seemed that demons were popping up everywhere. And so, for the last 3 years, he had succeeded in avoiding the prophecy by keeping Buffy away from Sunnydale.

Buffy didn't know what to think. She was stunned by the confession, yet at the same time she was touched by his desire to protect her. Then a nasty question formed in her mind, "So what you're saying is, that the world would have been better if I had died 2 years ago."

"No," he said quickly, and then added, "I'm not certain anymore about whether you would have died. Maybe something was changed in the Codex and I didn't catch it. I am now only certain that I should have been more suspicious of that woman and her motives. Especially now, after hearing Giles' story. Because you see that woman's name was 'Anya'. And I have a sick feeling in my heart that she was really this 'Anyanka' whom Giles was talking about. I'm sorry, Buffy, but I now think that I have betrayed you, by betraying the world that you were fighting to save." Buffy and Merrick sat in silence as each pondered the possibilities of the question 'What if?' and wondered about how the world might have been different.

After a while, Merrick rouse himself and said, "Buffy, promise me you will never give up. I know you are suffering terribly right now, and this is last thing you want to hear from me now, but you must continue the fight. There are so many demons on the loose now, and the world desperately needs your help. Yes, there is another Slayer now, but I think you've been given this chance to help her by a miracle of God. And miracles seem to be in short supply these days."

Buffy nodded her head. "I'll try," she told him, recognizing the truth in his words.

Merrick moved towards her, "Now I think it's time. We wouldn't want them to get any ideas about you if they were to come in and see me still alive."

Buffy nodded and stood to embrace him. "I love you, Merrick," she whispered softly in to his ear. "I'll never forget you. You were the best Watcher a Slayer could have ever had."

"I love you to, Buffy," he replied as he wrapped his arms around her to hug her for the first and last time. "You were the greatest thing in the world to have ever happened to me. It was a privilege and an honor to be your Watcher. I have always been so very proud of you, my dear. But now it's time to say 'Good Bye'." He turned his head upwards, exposing his neck to her.

"Good Bye," she whispered, fighting to keep from bursting into more tears, wanting to give him as much dignity as possible in these finale moments. Her face morphed as she allowed the demon to rise to the surface. Then, pulling him as tightly to her body as she could, she leaned forward and sank her teeth into his neck.

She fed as quickly as she could, wanting to make it as painless to him as she possibly could. Soon she sensed him lapse into unconsciousness. A few minutes later, selt elt his heart slow and then stop. Gently she lowered his body to the floor, positioning him as if he were simply resting briefly against the wall. "I'll make them pay, Merrick," she said as she looked at his body. "I swear it."

She sat back down on the cell's floor, again, and closed her eyes, not wanting to look anymore. Praying for the escape of sleep. After a while, she slipped into a dreamless slumber.
*****
She awoke to the sound of the Master and Willow opening the cell door. "Well done, childe," he said to her before turning to Willow, "I told you she could do it. These Watcher's are all such trusting fool's where their Slayer's are concerned. It must have been 'child's play' for her," he paused to smile at his pun. It took Buffy a moment to realize he had been talking about Merrick unchaining her, and stifled her desired to shoot back an insolent remark. **No. I'm not going to let Merrick's sacrifice be in vain,** she thought as she smiled up at the Master. "He was very surprised, Master," she said sweetly. **Well, that was true anyway.**

"I'm certain he was, Childe," he said smiling at her again. "But now that you have had your fun, Willow is still most upset about your behavior towards her earlier. In spite of my assurances that I have punished you enough to teach you proper respect, she is still unhappy." He moved behind Willow and wrapped his arms around her. Willow was smirking at Buffy, "You see, childe, she is such a hands on person that, unless she has done it herself, she just can't be satisfied that every little detail has been taken care of. And I can never refuse my favorite, childe."

Willow's smile grew as she looked adoringly up at him.

"Now remember, Willow," he said turning her to look into her eyes, "I don't want to see any permanent damage."

"Yes, Master," she replied demurely.

"Very well. I will be back tomorrow for you, childe," he said to Buffy. "Have fun,' he then said to Willow as he left.

Buffy stared in fear at Willow. **I can do this,** she thought to herself, **I will survive. It's only pain. I can cry and scream but I will not break for these, bast.**

.**
Willow slowly turned towards Buffy and drew out a box of matches. She shook it and smiled at the sound of the matches rattling inside. She continued to smile as she slowly strolled over to Buffy, until she was directly in front of her. She held up a single match and looked at it. Buffy felt a shiver coarse through her as she looked at the match as well.

"Puppy used to bark for me when I would play with him," she said in a wistful tone of voice. Then she looked back at Buffy, "Let's see what you can do."

With single flick of her nail, Willow lit the match.