Flesh Into Gear

Title: Flesh Into Gear
Author: claudia6913
Rating: R
Pairing: Aus/S/W
Summary: Drusilla has been killed by none other then Willow. What will Angelus and Spike do when they find out?
Disclaimer: I, unfortunately, own none of the characters; they belong to Joss and Co. I’m just borrowing them for my sick and twisted pleasure. The title was taken from the song ‘Flesh Into Gear’ by CKY (Camp Kill Yourself), along with the lyrics.
Distribution: If I posted it to your list…well then I guess you can have it. Otherwise, just drop me a line…I’m sure to say yes.
Feedback: But of course. I tend to really, really like the stuff. It’s almost an obsession. Claudia_6913@hotmail.com

A/N: Thanks to Gabrielle for yet another wonderful challenge and for all of the input for this fic. You are the best! The title was taken from the song ‘Flesh Into Gear’ by CKY (Camp Kill Yourself), along with the lyrics.

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Chapter 4

“So?” Angelus asked Spike when he walked into Angelus’ room. He’d wanted to go with Spike and stalk Willow, taunting her and frightening her; but right now, she thought he was Anbackback from the dead, or his ghost. Thinking back, that meeting with Willow couldn’t have gone any better. She’d been surprised, confused, and very scared.

“So, it went well,” Spike said evasively. He wanted to key Angelus up for this, prime him for the story.

“Well? That’s all you have to say…it went well?” Angelus asked incredulously.

“It went bloody wonderfully,” Spike said smugly.

“Do tell.”

And tell Spike did. He described vividly every look that had crossed Willow’s face, every beat of her heart, and every hitch of her breath. Spike was enjoying the retelling almost as much as he’d enjoyed the actual events of that night. He watched as Angelus’ smile grew with every detail until he was smiling as big as the Cheshire cat, and just as deviously. As Spike finished his story, the room was left buzzing. You could feel the excitement flowing through them.

Finally, after a few moments of reflection, Angelus said, “Well, my boy, this calls for a celebration. There’s a few hours of darkness left. Let’s go see what trouble we can get ourselves into.”

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Willow’s alarm went off, loud and shrill, next to her bed. Groaning, she hit the snooze button and rolled over. She hadn’t gotten a good nights sleep, and what little sleep she had gotten had been riddled with nightmares of Drusilla’s haunting eyes, Spike asking her to come outside so he could kill her, and Angel’s blood covering her.

Somewhere in the back of her mind, a phone was ringing. Breaking through the fog in her sleep-muddled mind, Willow realized it was her phone that was ringing. Reaching over to the nightstand by her bed, Willow fumbled for the phone.

“Hello?” Willow asked groggily. Her eyes didn’t want to focus when she opened them, so she just kept them closed.

“Willow?” a British voice asked. For a moment, Willow’s heart froze and she flashed on an image of Spike before she recognized Giles’ voice.

“Giles? What’s wrong? Why are you calling me so early?”

“Willow, dear, it’s after noon. Are you not feeling well?” Giles asked, concerned. Xander had come to him earlier telling him that Willow hadn’t been in class. He’d told Xander not to worry and that he’d give her a call. Giles had reminded Xander that they’d had a late night the other night and Willow had been the only one not to take a nap.

“What?!” Willow screeched, sitting bolt upright. “Noon?” She looked over to the clock and saw that Giles was right, it was just after noon and she’d slept half the school day away, missing most of her classes.

“Are you alright?” Giles asked again.

“Yeah, I mean, I couldn’t sleep last night, but I didn’t mean to sleep this late. I’ll be up at the school in a half hour.”

“Will—“ Giles tried to say, but Willow had hung up on him. He felt a bit better having called her. He wouldn’t admit it to the others, but he’d been worried about her. Willow had been quiet, more so than usual, since she’d come back from the hospital.

After hanging up the phone, Willow quickly got dressed, ran downstairs grabbing her book bag, and practically ran the entire way to school. All the while, she berated herself for sleeping in. Then she remembered why she hadn’t slept well, Spike, the nightmares, and Angel’s bloody ghost. She’d had a busy week.

Finally, Willow made it to school just as the bell rang, signaling the end of lunch period. She walked into the school and spotted Oz, Xander, and Cordelia walking down the hall in front of her. She smiled to herself and walked faster to catch up. After her grueling night, she wanted and needed the easy, uncomplicated chatter of her friends. She had missed Oz too. Coming up behind them, she caught part of their conversation.

“I talked to Giles. He said he’d call Willow at lunch,” Xander said.

“I stopped by her house this morning…,” Oz said, trailing off and shrugging his shoulders.

“Something’s up with Willow. She’s been different since she got back from the hospital,” Xander said. “Then, last night, she looked kind of spooked. Think Drusilla did something to her? Other then the bite I mean?”

Dropping back, Willow had heard enough. She didn’t feel like being interrogated or hovered over right now. She still hadn’t decided what to tell them yet. She wasn’t even sure what she thought about it all herself yet. If she was being haunted by Angel’s ghost, then why? Worse yet, if he was not a ghost, how did he get his soul, and how did he get out of hell? Then there was the question of why Spike was following her. Was he seeking retribution for her killing of Drusilla? Was he playing with his food before he ate it? Or was there another reason?

Willow was startled out of her thoughts by the bell, and ran to her next class.

flesh into gear
myself appears dissected and pretentious
a simple sound a heavy side

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During her classes, Willow had been unable to concentrate. She had tried to put all of her thoughts in order and figure out what to do about…well, everything. Now she was sitting in the library, attempting to listen to Giles as he laid out their plans for patrol later that evening. She noticed that Giles seemed distracted and she briefly wondered if Angel had paid him a visit like the one he had her. Somehow, she didn’t think so; Willow figured, instead, that he had another lead on Buffy. She wondered where he would take off this time. She also felt bad for him. Each one of his supposed tips had led nowhere and it was taking its toll on Giles.

Giles had finished organizing the patrol groups and their cemetery assignments, and then told them to meet back at the library when they were done. Finally, Willow would be able to speak to Giles and find out what she should do about Spike.

“Alright,” Xr sar said grabbing a stake and going to stand next to Cordelia. “Let’s go do that slaying thing with the stakes and the creepy graveyards.”

Willow walked up to Oz and gave him a hug then said, “Go on ahead. I have to talk to Giles. I’ll catch up to you in a minute.”

“Are you ok?” Oz asked concerned. “You’ve been distant lately.” Gently he tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, kissing her forehead.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” Willow said smiling. “I’m just worried about Giles. I think he has another tip on Buffy and I want to talk to him about it.”

Oz nodded and kissed her, then went to follow Xander and Cordelia. After Oz left, Willow sighed. She didn’t like lying to Oz, but she wasn’t really lying, just leaving out a detail or two. She was truly worried about Giles. She would tell her friends about Spike after she got Giles’ opinion.

Sitting at the table in the middle of the library, Giles looked up from the piece of paper as Willow walked up to him.

“Willow,” Giles said surprised. “Aren’t you going to patrol with the others?”

“Yes,” Willow said. She fidgeted with the back of the chair, deciding to stand instead to say this. “It’s just, well, did you get another lead?” Willow was stalling and she knew it. She just didn’t know what to say. She didn’t know how to explain to Giles the nightmares or the fact that Spike was stalking her.

“What? Oh, yes. I’m checking up on it,” Giles said folding the paper as he caught Willow glancing at it.

Awkward silence descended on them. Both Willow and Giles knew he was becoming obsessed but neither of them wanted to voice it aloud. Somehow it felt as if saying that would make the fact that Buffy was gone, all that more obvious. Like if they said it out loud, it would somehow jinx all of Giles’ efforts and Buffy would never come back.

Willow opened her mouth to say something but nothing came out. Something had caught her eye behind Giles. A figure stood just inside the shadows by the stacks. A lump formed in her throat. ‘It couldn’t be,’ she thought. Willow closed her eyes and counted to five hoping the outline of Angel would be gone when she opened them. However, he wasn’t. Angel had moved so that he was clearly visible in the light. He wore the same blue shirt with the same bloodstain on the front. Looking into his eyes, Willow saw again the sorrow and pain. Her vision blurred as tears threatened to fall. She watched as Angel mouthed the word ‘Why?’ Willow shook her head no, backing up slowly.

“Willow?” Giles asked, breaking through her fright. “What’s wrong?”

“I – I,” Willow stuttered, pointing behind Giles. However, Angel was gone when Giles turned around to look. Willow hadn’t seen Angel leave. He was simply there one minute and gone the next, just like last time. Giles was looking at her with concern. “I thought I saw something,” she said, covering up for her stutter and state of shock.

“Dear girl, you’ve been through too much,” Giles sailkinlking up to her and guiding her out of the library. “Why don’t I take you home? You shouldn’t go on patrol tonight.”

Willow nodded absently. She was too busy thinking about Angel to pay Giles much attention. There was so much about him and his visits that she didn’t understand. First and foremost was, why her? She hadn’t been the one to kill Angel and send him to hell, so why visit her all bloodied? Was Angel trying, somehow, to reach out to her for help?

Willow barely registered being placed into Giles’ old Citreon and him driving her home. All she could think about was Angel. He’d mouthed the word ‘Why’. But, why what? Earlier he had asked her what she had done to him. Willow didn’t know. Thinking, she couldn’t place anything that she could have done to affect him in any way. True, she had tried to re-ensoul him, but she hadn’t been able to finish the spell. Drusilla had seen to that. Then, Willow remembered what Giles had asked her a week ago about how far she’d gone in the spell. ‘Could that be it?’ Willow wondered. ‘Did I mess something up by only doing half the spell? Is Angel stuck in some sort of limbo?’ Willow thought that was the most likely reason for Angel to haunt her. If it was because he died and went to hell, then naturally he would be haunting Buffy, wherever she was.

“Well, here we are,” Giles said, bringing Willow out of her thoughts.

“Oh,” Willow said looking up at her house. She took a quick look around, paying special attention to the tree Spike had stood under the other night. Seeing that Spike was nowhere in sight she thanked Giles for the ride and opened the door to get out.

Giles placed a hand on Willow’s arm and said, “Get some sleep.”

Nodding, Willow stepped out of the car and shut the door behind her. She waved to Giles as he pulled away and began walking up to her door.

“Miss me, Pet?” a low, husky voice said from behind her.

could win the whole world over
you live in fear of being someone that you didn't want to
i realize your insecurity will get the best of you

Willow spun around quickly and reached for the cross in her bag, but her bag wasn’t there. She’d forgotten it at the library. Willow had been too preoccupied with the ghost of Angel to remember and now she was alone without protection and facing a deadly vampire, again.

“Spike,” Willow said softly. She didn’t know what to do. Looking back, she tried to calculate if she could make it to her door.

“You can try,” Spike said, noticing her look at the front door. “I’d like the chase.”

“What do you want, Spike?” Willow asked.

Spike took a step towards Willow and she took a step backwards. Smiling he took the time to look her up and down, from her sneakers to the yellow tights she wore. His eyes lingered on the hem of her skirt that stopped just above the knees, then moved up to her yellow sweater. Finally, he looked at Drusilla’s mark on her neck. Spike stepped quickly up illoillow before she could back away and reached to touch the angry red flesh. The dolls and the clothes Drusilla had left behind meant nothing compared to the mark he looked at now. Spike extended his fingers just a hair’s breadth away from Willow’s flesh, not touching her, but desperately wanting to.

Willow was rooted to the spot, unmoving and speechless. Spike was practically caressing her neck, sending shivers down her spine. She thought the look on his face was one of loving or longing…possibly hunger. Willow just wasn’t sure. The bite mark tingled, almost as if it wanted Spike to touch her. Breaking out of her stupor, Willow stepped back.

They looked at each other for a long moment. Willow was sure this would be the night she died, but she was determined not to make it easy for him. Willow took another tentative stop backwards.

Spike didn’t move to stop Willow’s slow progression to the safety of her house. Instead he watched her, studied her. Something had clicked for him in that moment when they’d looked at each other. He wanted her. He smiled as she took two more steps backwards.

Breaking the silence, Spike said, “Why don’t we go inside.” He walked up to her and laughed softly at her look of utter disbelief.

Willow backed up another step and said, “I’m not inviting you into my house, Spike.” Willow wished once more that Buffy was here, or Xander and Oz or even Giles, but none of the cemees tes they had planned to patrol was anywhere near her house. Silently, Willow cursed her luck. She dug in her pockets for her keys and took out the house key. Walking backwards she slowly made her way to her door with Spike following just a step away.

Just as she turned the key, Spike grabbed a holdher.her. “Not going in without me, are you?” he asked. Spike took the opportunity and inhaled deeply. He could smell Willow, her fear, and just below those was Drusilla’s scent. Spike licked his lips and inhaled again.

“Let go of me, Spike,” Willow said through clenched teeth. She tried to pull out of his hands, but he gripped her harder, hurting her.

“Why must you make this difficult, Pet?” Spike asked pulling her flush with him so that she had to look up into his face. Her warm body pressed against him was a distraction. He wanted to moan and buck into her, but he controlled himself and pushed her back so that she was no longer touching him.

Spike could see that she wasn’t going to let him in. Nevertheless, he didn’t way to stay outside where the watcher or one of her other friends could come by and ruin this time he had with her.

“Look, you can always bloody uninvite me in the morning,” Spike said shrugging. “’Sides, I’m not going to kill you if that’s what you’re worried about.”

Willow face formed a scowl, “And I should believe you, why?” she asked.

“Got plans for you yet, Luv,” Spike said, smiling, and opened the door to her house.