Meet The Family

Meet the Family 3

~Later That Morning~

Pubert slowly pushed open the back door to the mansion he had found. He sighed with relief that none of the family was in sight. His parents might think he was responsible enough for a flame-thrower but still thought he should have someone with him when he stayed out all night.

"Where have you been?" came the question from the shadows. Pubert didn't jump, he would swear later he never jumped...but he did.

"Alexander, that you sulking in the shadows?"

"Who else would it be?"

Pubert nodded then wished he hadn't as his hangover made it's presents known. Xander looked at his cousin hard then sighed, " Too much fun last night?"

" I found this great bar willing to serve me, the people were so friendly and willingly to play with me. The screams, Cousin, you would have been so proud of me."

Xander smiled, " Sounds like fun, maybe I'll go with next time. What was the name of the place?"

"The Alibi Room...I think?"

'Willy's,' thought Xander ' out of all the places in the 'Dale he found Willy's.'

Xander put an arm around the boy, " Come on to the kitchen, I'll fix you the Harris Family Hangover Fix-it." He said leading the young boy down the hall to the kitchen.

"Will it taste horrible?"

Xander gave the boy a look, " Do you really need to ask that? Your lucky it was me and not one of the others that saw you come in."

"Where are they anyways?"

"Well, if the sounds were anything to go by Aunt and Uncle are still in bed..." Both boys looked at each other and shuttered at the image that produced, " Wedsday and Pugsley should be..." there came a scream then a crash, " wake right about now..." Pubert sat down at the kitchen table as Xander began pulling things out of the cabinet and refrigerator. Pubert watched as he put everything but the kitchen sink in to a bowl and mix it together with a wooden spoon. Then watched as Xander poured the thick, chunky black mixture into a glass and handed it to Pubert.

"The trick is to chug in down." Xander told him.

Pubert looked at the glass then at this Cousin, " It won't poison me will it?"

Xander looked insulted and huffed out, "No, besides if I was going to do that I'd be more straight forward about it."

Pubert thought about that a moment then nodded before grabbing the glass and chugging it down. Xander than began putting thing together for breakfast as Wedsday came into the kitchen her hair looking a bit singe...

"Where's Pugsley?" Xander asked.

"He's tied up." Replied Wedsday as she got some dark colored liquid out of the fridge and poured it in to a glass. She looked at her younger brother who was turning an odd green color and holding his stomach. She saw the glass in front of him then looked at Xander and raised an eyebrow as Xander looked blankly at her in return.

Xander nodded.

"Good Morning, ma enfants," said Morticia as she walked into the kitchen, " Alexander are you cooking?"

Xander looked down at the stove in shock, " Why, I think...I am."

"Silly boy," his aunt said with a slight smile as she sat down, " I will be going to see Jessica," Morticia hiss out the word as if it cause her physical pain. Xander looked at he confused.
" About the Reunion..."

"Oh, umm, you should wait until Dad leaves for work that should be in about twenty minutes." Xander told her.

"I'm not afraid of the drunken lay-about that's married to my youngest sister." Morticia sneered.

"Aunt Tisha, that is my dad you're talking about."

Morticia's silent spoke for her then she said, " You know if you weren't my favorite nephew I would have drowned you the first time you called me that."

Xander just grinned at her. Then Gomez and Pugsley came in and sat at the table. Wedsday set the table with the bronzes dishes and cup ware as Xander dished out the food. Pubert bolted from the table the smell of the food finally getting to him, down the hall and to the nearest bathroom. The sounds out vomiting could be heard as the rest of them began to eat.

" What's wrong with our youngest?" asked Gomez.

Wedsday looked up from her food, "The Harris Family Hangover Fix-it."


***********


~Magic Box~


Spike sat on the stairs glaring at the Slayer and her boytoy. He had tried to warn them about what was coming be they just didn't want to believe the evil vampire. They would rather believe all their preconceived notions they had about the boy.

"I'm just saying, watch yourself, be respectful, that's all."

Buffy just smirked, " Please, as if any one related to Xander, could be dangerous."

Spike snorted, " Don't say I did warn you, Slayer."

*********

~Outside the Magic Box~


"A magic shop?" asked Wedsday unimpressed.

"I know it is cliché but it works for us." Said Xander.

"Do you think they'll like us?" asked Pugsley.

Xander looked surprised at the question, " Of course, how could they not...well Buffy might be a little cold to you, be she's just like that."

"That's the one who's the Slayer, right?" asked Pubert.
Xander nodded.


*********


The door to the shop opened and the Scoobies saw Xander walk in followed by a dark haired girl and two boys.

"Xander, who are they?" asked Buffy.

"Family."

Giles who was leaning against the counter sighed, " Well, introduce them and us." 'Really the boy had no manners.' Thought the Watcher.

"Guys, I'd like you to meet my cousins, this is Wedsday Addams," They looked at the girl who had pulled a bottle with a skull and crossbones on it and took a drink from it. Xander grabbed it way from her and glared as she looked blankly at him.

"Her brother Pugsley," Who had wandered of to the weapons display and was swings a sword around. Xander walked over and yanked the sword away from him. Pugsley shrugged and Xander put the sword back on the display.

"And the youngest is Pubert," Who was sitting on a table with a lit match and some dynamite giggling as Dawn watch widen eyed. Xander walked by him and blew out the match with a frown. He turned to his friends a look of shock was on all of their faces. Xander saw Spike on the stairs who was smirking.

"I tried to warn them..." Spike muttered at Harris's look.


Xander sighed, " The older gentleman is Rupert Giles, our mentor figure."

Giles smiled at that then frowned, " Addams...Xander did you say Addams!" He said in a tone of voice that was a mixture of amazement and horror. The Addams children frowned at it. It was a tone they had heard a lot in their lives it was never meant a good thing.

"Moving on, " Xander said quickly not liking the tone either, " The blonde picking up the crossbow is Buffy Summers...put that down! There will be no staking or killing of my family members..."

"But...but Xander they make me feel all wiggy!"

Xander snorted, " I'm sure you make them feel the same but they haven't tried to kill you."
"Yet."

"Not helping, Wedsday" Xander said as she crossed her arms over her chest.

" Xander, why are they dressed like that...like someone died?" asked Dawn from the table where Pubert sat next to her on it he looked down at her.

"Wait." He said.

Dawn looked at him then snickered, " Cool." She said.

Pubert grinned back, " I like her, Alexander."

Xander smiled gratefully, " That nice, her name is Dawn, she's Buffy's sister but don't hold that against her...she can be evil when she puts her mind to it."

" The redhead is my best friend Willow," who had come up and started to babble at Wedsday.

Wedsday's eyes widen at this and she took a step back and grabbed Xander's arm and hid behind him.

"Make her stop, Alexander, she's scaring me." Wedsday almost whimpered.

Xander laughed and motion for Willow to move away, Willow smirked back. She remembers the last time this part of Xander family had visited. They had gotten the better of her then. She had, had nightmares about them for years...until she found out and the hellmouth and that vampires were real...now she had different nightmares.

"The shy two toned blonde is Willow's girlfriend Tara." Who waved slightly and Pugsley waved back at her and she smiled at him.

"Hey, what about me, Whelp."

Xander rolled his eyes, " And that is a vampire with a government chip in his head." He looked at his cousins, Spike saw an evil smile cross Xander's face, " and you three can play with him but no dusting him."

Spike's eyes went as big and as round as any Anime characters could ever hope to get.

"Bloody Hell, wonder if Peaches wants any company in LA." He wondered aloud.

Xander then heard some one clear their throat. Xander looked around the room blankly.

"Xander!" said Buffy.

"Right, the boring looking blond guy, that's Riley, him...you're not allowed to play with, he is Buffy's so only she can torture him."

"I don't torture my boyfriend."

"Why not?" Wedsday asked deadpanned.

"Because I don't hurt humans!"

Pugsley frowned, " Then what do you do for fun?"

Buffy frowned then answer, " I shop, go to movies, spend time with my friends..."

"Typical." Muttered Wedsday.

"Horrorible!" said Pugsley.

"You poor thing." Said Pubert.

"...Slay the evil undead and various demons..." Buffy continued her hand sliding toward a near by dagger.


*******


Xander sat on the stairs next to Spike, " That went better that I thought it would."

Spike snorted, " Slayer's still jumpy and the ways Wedsday child keeps staring at her is not helping."

"True, but the rest of them..." Xander said as Spike started to laugh, " What!"

"Captain Cardboard jump ship as soon as he could..."

"You would think with his training he could handle a simple question."

"Harris, a seven year asked the best way to subdue a demon."

"Dawn asked the same thing last week and he didn't freak out then."

"Think it's a bit different when the Slayer's sis asks something like that.... The Witches seem to have taken a shine to Pugboy."

"That's Pugsley, Fangless." Xander hissed.

Spike rolled his eyes, " Calm down, didn't mean nothing by it. Just couldn't remember how it say the name."

Xander nodded, " Yeah, didn't know he knew so much about magic...going to have to watch what he shows them."

Xander and Spike exchange a look of understanding. Willow had become a little too careless when using her magic.

"So, you coming to dinner tonight?" Xander asked.

Spike frowned, " Didn't think I was invited."

"Were you in the room when I said 'you all are invited to dinner at the mansion' ?"

Spike nodded.

"Then you were invited...besides I'm going to need help to kept Buffy from staking my Aunt and Uncle...if the kids make her feel wiggy..."

"Do you think we could stop her?" asked Spike unsure.

"Well if not, there's always chains, ya'know."