Kindness, Love, and Acceptance

Part 3

Xander stood outside his apartment door and debated on whether he should go in or not. A big part of him wanted to just turn back around and drive back to L.A. He knew Spike might not even be there; after waking up alone it was likely he took off.

Xander took a deep breath and put the key in the lock. He turned the doorknob and slowly pushed open the door. He stepped inside and was just closing the door when he was flattened against it and a snarling blonde vampire was in his face.

"Where. Have. You. Been. Xander?"

Xander opened his mouth to reply when all of a sudden he was instantly released and Spike stepped back, a look of rage on his face. Xander swallowed and tried to speak again only to find himself being sniffed at.

Spike sniffed his neck, his chest, and then dropped to his knees and pushed his face into Xander's groin. He snarled and bared his teeth at him. He could smell someone else’s scent on the man. Something almost familiar. Spike stood up and walked away from the flustered human.

"Spike, wait. I can explain."
"Explain what, Xander? How you left me sleeping and took off to fuck someone else? This some sort of game to you? Revenge for the slayer? I thought we were past all of that, I thought you loved me."

Xander ran his hands through his hair and sighed. Damn vampire senses. He showered before he left L.A.; he thought he was safe to come home. "I do. Spike..."

"Don't Xander, don't say you love me and expect me to sit back and watch as you fuck around on me. I won't do it. Not again."

"It was a mistake. I was drunk. I was hurting because of you."

Spike spun around and his yellow eyes bored into Xander. "Because of me? And what the hell did I do that made you run off and get drunk? How is your fucking around my fault?"

"When we made love, you called me Angel." The answer was whispered so low, had Spike not been a demon, he would have missed it. As it was, he wished he had. He thought back to the night they had finally consummated their relationship. Had he actually done that to the young man? Called him his sire's name?

"Xander, I'm sorry. I don't remember saying that."

"But you did. It hurt Spike. I won't be a substitute for someone else, if you want him then please don't use me as someone to pass the time. I couldn't stand that."

Now Spike felt like shit. He could understand why Xander took off now. He could even understand the getting drunk and shagging someone. He had done it himself in the past. Anya was a good example of that. "Who was it? Anyone I know?"

Xander walked into the living room and flopped onto the couch. He put his head in his hands and sighed. "I went to L.A." Spike growled and stormed over to the couch. He was about to drag Xander to his feet and shake him for going to Angel when he spoke again.

"I went into this cheap little bar and got drunk. I was three sheets to the wind, muttering to myself about "stupid fucking vampires" when this kid sits down across from me. He tells me he knows about vamps, that he hunts them. We start talking. He asks the name of the vampire that bothered me, offered to dust him for me." Xander started to chuckle. "Gods, what was I thinking? Telling some kid in a bar all my problems? That's not me. Anyway, so I tell him the vamps name is Angel, and he crushes the glass in his hand."

Spike sat down next to Xander, he was still in game face and still not happy. "So this kid? He knows Angel?"

"You could say that."

"And what? You had something in common so you shagged him?"

Xander cringed at Spike's bluntness. "Not exactly. I mean yeah, I had sex with him. But it was more because of how he knew Angel. I was pissed Spike, not just in the drunk off my face sense. I was angry, with you, with Angel. I wanted revenge."

"How does the kid fit into this?"

"He's Angel's."

"He's Angel's what? One of his groupies, his little human pets?"

"He's Angel's son. His and Darla's"

~!~

Spike was silent for some time after Xander's confession. Xander left the room and showered again, he soaped himself over and over until the hot water ran out. When he came back out to the living room, Spike was still on the sofa but he was back in his human face at least. "What happened to the kid? Christ, do you even know his name?""Of"Of course I do! Jesus Spike, what kind of person do you think I am? His name is Connor..." Spike snorted. "... and he jumped out the bathroom window this morning. I don't know where he went after that."

"Well, pet. You better hope he didn't go back to Daddy. Otherwise I can expect we'll be having company soon."

Xander groaned and hung his head. Now he knew why drinking was a bad idea. It never solved your problems; it just made more of them. "I'm sorry, Spike. Are we gonna be okay?"

"As long as this never happens again luv. I won't be your bit on the side, if we're gonna be together, it has to be monogamous. I don't do open relationships."

"I know. It is. I don't want anyone else. I love you."

"Then we'll be fine. Providing of course that Angelus doesn't show up here and tear you to bits."

"Thanks for the positive reinforcement there, S." ." Spike chuckled and pulled Xander into his arms. They sat contentedly on the sofa waiting to see what the night would bring them.

~!~