It's An Adventure

Spike maneuvered the car into the slow lane, dropping his speed to 80 mph and steering with his knees. His hands were busy searching for the cell phone he had dropped earlier; at least *one* was, the other was holding the map across the steering wheel, and most of the front window, obscuring his view. He was loath to wake Xander. The boy could try the nerves of a Saint, and Spike was *no* Saint. His hand latched onto the phone and he pulled it from beneath Xander's ass with a triumphant grin. He batted the open map down in time to see the car ahead of him practically *stopped*. He slammed on the brakes, his arm going out to hold Xander in place. Hell! Couldn't *any* one drive anymore? Was he the only one desearving of an automobile? They should all go back to horse and buggy.

"Non drivin' lunatics!" He hit the horn. "Drive! We're on the bloody highway!"

He punched in the numbers, one handed, and put the phone to his ear, cradling it with his shoulder. His hand went to punch in the cigarette lighter and fish out another smoke. When he heard the greeting he replied in a sibilant voice, "Have you checked the children?"

"Peaches! How'd ya know it was me?" Spike snickered into the phone, lighting up. "What? That movie is a *classic*. He's calling from the house! I loved it! So where ya at? Um. Yes. I know it. Don't suppose I've time to cruise through Beverly Hills, eh? Yeah. The sun. Oh, very funny. If I go poof while driving, little Xander might be a bit upset. What? He's sleeping. No! Terrible passenger! He's *fine*. I'm looking at him right now! No, I do *not* have his head in my lap and his body in the trunk! All though, that does-Oh! What? I'm a *brilliant* driver! Never had an accident! Ha! Say, I know this area! Isn't this where I had you tor-um, so? Got a good price, did you, then? Peaches? You there? Angel? Um. Yes, well. Won't be long now. Must ring off. Not safe to drive and talk you know." Spike hit 'end' and tossed the phone into the back seat. He crumpled the map up and tossed it over his shoulder as well. Time to watch for his exit.

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"Xany." Xander ignored the sing song voice. "Xaaannderrrr."

"Um. No. Don' wanna wake up."

"Come on, Xany. Wakey, wakey."

"Umm, It's a ter cor conference day, no school."

"Xander."

"I'm on the late shift."

"Xander!"

"I've been fired. Don' have to get up."

"*Xander*!"

Xander's head lifted with a jolt. "What? Shit! What?" He looked over at a grinning Spike. He'd never seen the vampire grin so much, and damn if it wasn't starting to give him the permanent creeps. He blinked his tired eyes, and yawned. "Oh. Right. So. Are we there yet?" He looked out the window at the unfamiliar and dark streets.

"Just about, pet. And all in one piece, too. Reach back there and hand me the phone, will you, luv?"

"I don't wanna take off my seatbelt."

"Oh fer chrissake! Look about! Not a car insight! Get me the phone!"

Xander checked the streets for cars and pedestrians and stray animals and potholes. Thoroughly. He undid his seatblet, reached over, snagged the phone and buckled himself back in with lightning quick moves. He held the phone out to Spike. "Here."

"Xander! I don't believe I've ever seen you move so quickly!"

"Yeah, well, my life was in danger."

"I've seen you in mortal danger, pet; I've *placed* you in mortal danger, and still, I've never seen *those* moves." Spike chuckled, taking the phone and hitting redial.

"Can you feel me? I'm close." Spike whispered into the phone. "I feel *you*. You're so close."

"Do we *really* have time for the phone sex thing?" Xander asked.

Spike turned the corner and the car headlights picked up Angel, standing outside a darkened building, phone to his ear.

"Oooo, I *see* you. All sexy-like, in your leather. You know I like leather, don't ya baby?" Spike pointed at Angel and turned to Xander. "Look, up ahead, in the distance, in the black, it's BATVAMP!" He went back to talking into the phone. "You know what *I'm* wearing, sugar? Hum? What do you want me to wear?"

Angel closed the phone and put it in his pocket.

Spike pulled up beside him, still talking into the phone. "Sugar? Baby? I think my batphone died!" Spike parked and Xander jumped out of the car, running to greet Angel.

"Deadboy! Good to see you!" Xander wrapped his arms around Angel and gave the surprised vampire a hug. "Angel!" He yelled out. He placed his mouth close Angel's ear and whispered. "Don't make me get back into the car with him, please don't! I'll do *any*thing! Just don't make me get back in the *car*!"

"Xander, uh, hi." Angel put his arms around the boy, patting his back awkwardly.

Wesley stepped out of the building and Xander pushed away from Angel, going to the ex-watcher. "Wesley! Wes, my man! How've you been? How's things?" Xander gave Wesley a hug also, startling the man into a stumble. "Wes, what say? Can I borrow plane fare home from you? Pay you back, swear." Xander whispered into his ear.

"Xander! You slut! Quit throwing yerself at the hired help! I'll get jealous!" Spike said, coming from the car. He walked up to Angel and held out his arms. "Give us a hug, then, Daddy."