Shadows across the heart

WARNING!....ROUGH & SLIGHTLY NON-CONSENSUAL SEX


TITLE: Shadows across the heart
AUTHOR: Willie J
EMAIL: wmj166@yahoo.com
ARCHIVE SITE(S): http://parrot.nearheralways.com/index.php; http://www.brain-insane.com/beyondcanon; http://www.adult-fanfiction.org
PAIRINGS: A/X
RATING: NC-17
DISCLAIMER: I don't own any part of Buffy et all, nor Angel the Series.
FEEDBACK: Oh please send me feedback, privately or through the list
DISTRIBUTION: List Archives
SPOILERS:
BETA'D BY:
SUMMARY:
A/N: Those of Buffyverse are naturally Joss' creations, however, any and all other characters mentioned are my own.

Chapter 3

Once the hotel had steadied the three standing demons looked down at the humans they had accompanied with various expressions of exasperation. Then sighing, they slowly walked over to their humans. Making damn sure they took their sweet time about getting to them.

Xander lay twitching on the floor, while the three human newcomers were carefully picked up with accompanying groans and yelps of pains. All three looked uneasily at their demons' bland, sardonic faces, and quickly looked away.

“Oh please, let me be dead the next time,” Kaori groaned as Chalo roughly helped her to her feet. Looking into huge maroon eyes, she read the angry concern in the pupilless orbs and smiled placating. There was a sheepish, embarrassed look in her golden, distinctly Oriental eyes. She ducked her head, sleek purple-tipped ebony hair shielding her face from her demon's furious glare. She didn't dare grumble out loud to the female. Her lover had a nasty tendency to get back at her in very unexpected ways. Chalo had an uncanny patience to wait almost indefinitely for a perfect opportunity for payback.

“Oh, it's DEAD now you be a-wantin', eh?!” The Japanese demon called out mockingly, a slight singsong lilt in her voice. Irritably, the female shrugged out of her coat to reveal a white diaphanous top that crissed-crossed her breasts. It wrapped behind her back, the color steadily darkening to black, leaving her belly enticingly bare. The material widened, becoming a knee length skirt.

Chalo was a Dragmon demon. A race noted for their war-like attitude, and fierce tempers. Petite and much like her human Guardian, Chalo was also extremely beautiful. Tiny, iridescent scales flowed down from her bared shoulders to the small of her back. There was also a small triangular patch on her belly, that irresistibly caught the eye. Another trail of scales wrapped around her sleek legs, looking so much like body jewelry.

She took off feathered her hat, revealing that the feathers simply weren’t decorative accents. Giving her he bri brisk shake, Chalo sighed as the other multi-shaded green fronds straightened from their cramped position. She put her hands on her hips and glared at the three shamefaced humans.

“Okay, all those that agreed that we should just ‘Talk to the kid first’ so what just happened,” she stressed with meaningful clarity, “wouldn't happen. Show of hands please.” Raising her hand, Chalo affected great surprise to see her and the other two demons with their hands raised.

“Stupid humans!” Seecha sneered at the three guilty looking humans. Nobody could quite capture a sneer like a Santron demon. Their faces generally held an arrogant sneer, like all species were inferior to them. A fact which most of them held the private, and not so private, opinion.

Lakti simply shook his head at his irate mate and lover. He groaned silently, he could feel a lecture coming.

“Why is it that we demons apparently seem to know how humans will react much better than you humans, hmmm? Please, I am extremely anxious to understand this fascinating piece of humanology.” Chalo widened her eyes mockingly.

“Stop it all of you!” Alexis, the Guardian of the South, recovered enough to snap impatiently at the two scowling demons. Then with a sigh she added, “Look, okay, let’s just agree that we screwed up and leave it at that. The important thing is to get the pair Bonded ones upstairs before they come to.” She narrowed her eyes at the three innocent looking demons for a few seconds before mentally throwing her hands up in the air. Chalo and Seecha could always be counted on to do whatever the hell they wanted to do and her demon would be silently egging them on.

She glared at her demon Defender. Xtchaly widened his sloe black eyes before blowing her a mocking kiss. One of these days...she groaned before gesturing to the vampire and the newest guardian, watching critically as their bodies floated in the air. She carefully made sure they didn't connect accidentally with some sharp object.

With a glance at her fellow Guardians, she ascended the stairs. She just knew they were going to force her to explain the situation to the new Western defenders just because she was the youngest! They were always making her do the sucky jobs, she grumbled under her breath.

Not for the first time, she wondered how she could have possibly have been fooled. To see Kaori’s inscrutable expression and Lakti’s expressionless face, anybody would think the two golden skinned people had very little emotion. Or ever learned how to smile.

That was a big fat HA!

Kaori, Guardian of the East and Lakti, Guardian of the North, smirked mischievously at each other. They loved teasing their sober, little sister. After nearly four hundred years, you would think she would have gotten rid of that stick up her ass. They just hoped their new 'brother' would be more fun. And join in their little game of getting Lexi to relax.

They hurried eagerly after Lexi. Anxious to meet their new sibling.


Groaning, Xander opened bleary eyes. Long experience at getting a conk on the head had him waiting almost impatiently for the little birdies to stop flying around. But at a low moan from his side, he forgot all that and he turned his head too fast. His reward was the little birds abruptly mutated and became vicious, brain drilling monsters. He quickly closed his eyes and forced himself to relax.

“Remarkable...” Kaori said quietly as she watched the young man with fascinated eyes. “And I thought your awakening was fast,” she added in an aside to Lakti.

He smirked, assuming a lofty, arrogant mien. “It's because we're men and not lowly, inferior females.” Knowing full well, that his comment would instantly bug the hell out of his little Japanese sister. He ducked swiftly to avoid her mock furious swipe at him.


It was a game he and Kaori had been playing for almost a thousand years. His older sister had been born over a thousand years ago, in a time of feudal Japan when females were considered the lowest of the low. Inferior. It was wise that the Eastern Guardians once their successor had been identified, generally ‘appropriated’ that individual and brought them within their castle.

Once behind the fortified walls of the castle, the Guardian had all the time necessary to reverse the teachings of a lifetime. For within the walls of the castles, time no longer flowed precisely as it did in the outside world. And the Eastern Guardian had 120 years to ‘re-educate’ the demure and quiet Japanese maiden. Not that he wanted to shape the docile young girl into his own image. However, she needed to be strong, mentally and physically, to withstand the pressures of Guardianship. As well as outside influences that would be brought to bear on her.

In the centuries before the Inuit shaman came into his own Guardianship, Kaori had grown considerably. Emotionally, spiritually and intellectually. She was no longer tentative or fearful of expressing her opinions. In fact, to Lakti’s profound shock, she was not shy about beating him across the head the first time he arrogantly told her to return to the kitchen and stay there while MEN spoke.

No, Kaori Miyazaki was no longer the silent, docile young female that had first entered the domain of Castle East.

It had been a definite clash of wills between the newly invested Eastern Guardian and the rigid, controlled shaman. The West, North and South Guardians were constantly interceding between the two. The proud, young shaman refused to listen to a woman. He came from a time when females, though a necessary part of tribal life, took a definite backseat to males.

He was constantly rebuked by his mentor, the Northern Guardian, for his disdainful manner towards Kaori. It took a while, a little over a century, for him to lose his superior attitude. That and the fact that Ka was stronger and faster than he in a physical skirmish. He watched her at first grudgingly, then in silent admiration as she handled the business of being Guardian.

Gentle when necessary, harsh and ruthless when she needed. He watched her grieve terribly over decisions, then steel herself to carry out her judgments. Never slacking or ceding difficult decisions to Chalo or anyone else.

He came to respect her. Somewhere along the way, he no longer prefaces his thoughts with ‘If only she was a man…’ or regarded her actions with a critical eye. Nor did he compare her decisions and judgments to a male.

Long before he became a Guardian, he at last conceded and recognized her worth. Silently giving her the respect that she was due. More times than naught, during his training he bowed to her superior knowledge and skill. Truth be told, though he would never vocalize his thoughts, she had the patience and understanding that he lacked.


The two Guardians continued to bicker good-naturedly with each other, however, they kept part of their attention on the vampire and young man, still sprawled on the bed. They were well aware that when the demon woke, the human would not be far behind.

So they were not caught unawares when the vampire was suddenly on his feet and growling as he stood between them and his charge. Despite the vampire demon's obvious pain, he obeyed his new instincts that screamed to protect his Guardian.

Angel eyed the three humans, trying to hide his astonishment. Glancing quickly behind him at Xander's curious face he turned his attention back to the humans.

“Who are you...?” He snarled. He could hear the boy begin crawling across the bed towards them and turned to give Xander a quick, fierce frown to stay back. Satisfied, he directed his attention back to the potential threat of the strangers. But to his disbelief, he heard the boy was starting to creep towards them again. Looking over his shoulder he glared threateningly at Xander, shaking his head for the boy to stay put. His eyes widening at the mulish expression on the boy’s face as Xander continued to advance.

Angel hissed viciously, gratified at the fear that flared briefly in his charge's eyes. Yet at the hardened look of determination on Xander's face, he groaned.

“He'll do...” Lakti murmured softly to his sisters. They quickly hid their smiles when the two latest Guardian and Defender stood facing them.

“Who are you and what the hell are you doing in my hotel?! Where are my people?” Angel demanded.

“Let me start at the beginning,” Lexi stated smoothly enough. Quickly masking her start of surprise at the pinch Ka gave her. Though her eyes did narrow and she threw a black look at the other woman. “When the world was young and new, four humans were endowed with the responsibility for protecting our world against enemies that would bring ruin to us all. They were called Guardians and each was given a sphere of influence to govern and protect. North, South, East and West. And by the nature of their duties certain warlike races of demons were drawn to them as well, with one demon in particular bonding to that particular human. In effect becoming the Guardian's shield and protection. Later given the title of Defender. Since human and demon often shared the world, both races were enjoined to protect it as well.”

“Guardians have extremely long lives because sometimes a threat does not cease to be a threat for years, or even centuries. So they, we maintain vigilance. Throughout the ages, Shardts are born. Shardt's are potential Guardians to be. There are literally thousands of Shardts, but only four are chosen to ascend to the role of Guardianship. You were a Shardt, now you are the Guardian of the West.” She stated solemnly to the young boy. Her eyes were sympathetic considering he looked like he was going to pass out from shock.

“And you are his chosen Defender mate,” Lexi added with a slight inclination of her head to a shell-shocked Angel. He looked like he might join his mate in passing out too.

“We welcome you, Lord Alexander, Guardian of the West!” All three chorused, giving a full bow to him. Equal to equal. Well, not that equal, Ka thought critically. The boy had much to learn.

“But...but...there's gotta be some kinda mistake. Or maybe I'm dreaming,” he muttered to himself. “Yeah, that's it! This is all some sorta horrible dream and I'll wake up in my own bed. Pinch me,” he demanded to Angel, then yelped when Angel pinched him. “Why did you have to pinch me so hard? Did I even mention anything about pinching me THAT hard?” he yelled furiously at the unsympathetic vampire. Then with a gasp, Xander’s eyes widened. “Omigawd, it’s worst than a nightmare! It’s reality!”

Kaori gave him a sympathetic smile. “There's no mistake. We only recently learned of the Timorea's massacre in Sunnydale. All the indicators pointed to Sunnydale and then to you. It was their duty to inform you of your status and observe what demon you were associating with, if any. Once we sensed you were Claimed by your demon lover and ascended to being the Guardian, we simply presumed that it was because of the developing situation in Sunnydale.”

Xander closed his eyes as sickness rose in his stomach. “Omigawd, Spike...” he softly moaned. He slumped on the bed in distress. All because he was too damn scared to believe! He unconsciously leaned against Angel's thigh, hiding his face from the others.

“Spike...?” The three guardians glanced at each other in confusion before turning inquiring eyes on the motionless vampire. Motionless except for one hand unconsciously patting the boy's head.

“Spike was the demon he knew in Sunnydale. I think HE was supposed to be Xander's mate. Not me,” Angel answered bitterly, though he didn't stop stroking the dark head pressed against his side. He gave them a hopeful look.

They gazed at the latest Western defenders with horrified dismay.

“We are sorry but there's nothing we can do,” Lexi replied helplessly. “We don't make the rules on how Guardians and Defenders are formed. We simply welcome the new defrs ars and offer our aid,” she added softly.

“A bond between the can can never be broken.” Lakti sighed after speaking. “Perhaps your lover will wait for you?” He groaned to himself. Start to finish, this was all wrong! He should have known when they found out about the Timoreas that things were going to get crazy.

“And my mate? He's human...what about him?” Angel challenged the man angrily. He sat down abruptly, allowing the boy's silent tears to soak his shirt . Let him cry. Let him cry for them both.

“Did you already Claim him?” At Angel's negation, Lakti lifted his shoulders. “The pairBond will not allow anyone or anything to come between the two of you for possibly 50, to 75 years. After that, you may take other short term lovers, but your secondary focus will always be to each other. Naturally, your primary concern will be defending your Western sphere.”

“But I love Spike!” Xander looked up with a wet face to wail at them.

“And I was two weeks away from taking my final vows. I was to be a Bride of Christ. It had been my dream ever since I was a little girl. But I found myself pair Bonded to an incubus instead.” Lexi stated quietly. Her lips twisting as she recalled the vicious struggle she and Xtchaly had faced. She a virgin and he...was so far from not being a virgin, she ruefully thought.

Angel's brows shot up in surprise. Xander frowned, not recognizing the w “W “What's an incubus?” He whispered to Angel.

“Sex demon,” came the stunning reply.

Damnnnnn....and Xander looked at the Spanish girl with wide eyes, shocked out of his misery. Then he remembered something....

“You know what's going on in Sunnydale? You can help us stop it then, right?” He asked anxiously, his expression suddenly hopeful.

Ka hesitated, then shook her head. “No, this is supposed to be your task...dealing with this threat.”

“But what if I fail?!”

“Don't...” Aglakti responded with a deadly serious voice. “All Western Guardians have extensive knowledge at their fingertips. Look to your Library, I'm sure you'll find all the information you seek. When you are ready, call us and we will come.”

With that the three turned to leave.

“Wait!” Angel protested as he got to his feet with an incredulous face. “That's it?! Don't you have like something else to tell us? I mean, tell Xander? Does he have any special powers and other, I believe, extremely crucial information that may save our lives?!”

Lakti and Lexi nudged Kaori to speak. She was the oldest after all.

Giving them angry glares she turned to the new pair. “The most important power Xander will possess will be the ability to recover from any wound or injury within hours. How, sh, should the injury potentially be life threatening, naturally it will take longer. Otherwise, you both are completely immortal for the first two thousand years. After that, you will live or die according to what abilities you've developed. I fear I must caution you both that while others cannot permanently cause you harm or damage, you both have the power to hurt each other. You can die at each other's hand.”

Shaken, Xander moved away from Angel. Giving the vampire a look filled with deep suspicion.

“And if one of you dies, the other will also within minutes,” she warned them, smiling grimly at their look of shock. She took a deep breath and continued, looking a little embarrassed at what she said next. “The problem is that Guardians of the West always die before their successors are found. Sometimes, years will pass before a new one is found and invested into the office. Furthermore, each Guardian is vastly different in powers. None of us can or have ever used the same method in dealing with trouble. Quite frankly, our methods are simply incompatible with each other. As to powers, Western Guardian as far as I know,” she stressed the word, “And from what the previous Eastern guardian told me, is that your office has always been self-taught. Building on what your predecessors accomplished. Look in your Library, all your questions can be answered there.” This time they successfully made their escape from more unanswerable questions.


While their Guardians were having the necessary talk with the Western defenders, the demon Defenders were prowling around the lobby. Or at least Seecha and Chalo, Aglakti and Kaori's demons, were thoroughly investigating it. Xtchaly was lounging with incomparable sensuous grace on the circular garish couch.

Chalo cast a resigned look at the boneless relaxation the incubus coolly exuded. She shook her head, the feathery ends of her mohawk brushing against her tailbone. Moving across her scales with a tiny scratching sound. The dracian demon couldn't understand just how he did it, and so effortlessly too. It wasn't fair how he could still look so damn alluring even sprawled on that ugly red...thing.

“Don't hate me because I'm beautiful,” he murmured, with a wicked, glittering smile that slowly grew on his face. Behind a lock of silky black streaked blue hair, his eyes gleamed. Raising a long fingered hand, Xtchaly smoothed back his bone straight hair. He was sleek, beautiful elegance personified.

“Can't you think of anything but sex?!” she grumbled, looking vaguely annoyed. Yet despite herself, she felt arousal singing along her nerves. The bastard wasn't even exerting his seduction power!

Xtchaly smiled widen infinitesimally as sultry passion began darkening Chalo's pale lovely body to a wonderful deep, emerald green. The tips of her scales slowly shifting to a jade color. She slinked towards him, fumbling at the back of her neck for the tie to her dress.

“Xtchaly, Chalo don’t even go there...” Seecha said mildly without bothering to stop her snooping. “Besides, the humans are starting to come to.”

“And your point would be?” He asked in bored disinterest. He pulled Chalo astraddle his lap. Neither he nor Chalo had a problem with public sex. Beside, he already had her top pushed down, baring her breasts. Like miniature cantaloupes, he thought admiringly of the perky globes.

“If they see you two screwing in front of them, one of them is bound to yell, our Guardians will come running and you two will get screamed at and I, who you may notice is being extremely well behaved, will also be included in the said yelling. Now should any of these events come to pass, then I will be forced to become...upset with the two of you and deal with you accordingly,” she responded with seemingly endless patience. Then she looked at them.

Chalo and Xtchaly looked at each other before regretfully parting. Seecha in a bad mood went way beyond being nasty. Certain unintelligent demons with unknown death wishes often mistook her serene expression for passiveness. Or worse...gentleness.

They were wrong. Horribly, terribly wrong.

The one nice thing about Seecha was her even temper. She didn't look it, but she was always in a perpetually bad mood and would happily grant any and all death wishes. Sometimes people didn't even have say anything for her to grant their wish. Those so-called Vengeance Demons didn't have a thing on her. Her various 'Tricks' were required reading for any Vengeance Demon that wanted to be good at her or his job.

“Great, just great! Humans are always interrupting my fun...” Xtchaly grumbled sulkily from his slumped position. A petulant expression was on his strikingly blue face. The color didn't distract arom rom his sheer potent, masculine beauty. Graced with a full lips, the bottom slightly fuller than the top, they were a darker blue than his skin. Sighing in frustration, he shook back a tendril of black streaked, dark blue hair that Chalo’s restless hands had disturbed. He settled back against the couch with an annoyed look on his face.

Someone was definitely going to owe him big time for this! Then a slow, seductive look of cunning crossed his face. A smile that had the two females trembling, their breath coming fast as they gazed at him raptly as his charm power leaked out. Perhaps he could convince the other two Guardians to come back to the Southern sphere and then...

His eyes were hooded as he licked his lips slowly. Dreaming of the feel of the upcoming orgy.

“We are sooo getting fucked tonight,” Chalo muttered happily to Seecha, refastening her top. They shared a delighted lusty grin. “I'll talk to Ka and you better make sure Lakti shows up.”

“Little dragon, if I have to knock him out, we'll be there. I wouldn't miss this for the world,” the other breathed softly. Then they looked around at the first painful groan from the humans.


The first thing Gunn was aware of was someone seriously trying to pry his head off. And that ain't cool...hitting a brother when he's down. What kinda mess is that?!

“Here, drink this. It'll help ease the pain,” he heard a quiet voice say and felt his shaky hand wrap around a short glass. Without even thinking of the consequences, he gulped down the fizzy drink. Sighing as the jungle people stopped using his head to pound out their message of war. Then he slowly opened his eyes and gazed into a pair of cat-slitted maroon-colored eyes. Demon! His mind shrieked and he immediately tried to scramble away from the green skinned girl. At the hollow groan from his right, he carefully looked that way. Only to see Cordy braced against an orange-colored female and drinking thirstily from a cup. He tried to go to her, but found himself gently restrained. He looked down to find his wrist held in a seemingly casual grip by the girl. Shaken, all he could think was damn...for a little bitty thing, shorty got some power.

“Easy there big fellow. Take it slow or you'll wind up passing out again.” His particular demon smiled cheerfully at him, then cocked her head to the side. His stunned eyes were drawn to the feathers sticking straight up from her otherwise sleek, bald head. Then to his confused surprise, the feathers flattened before ly ely easing erect again. “By the way, I love what you're done to your head.” She grinned mischievously before releasing him and moving over to Fred, murmuring soft reassurance to the waking girl.

Wesley stood up carefully. Helped by, and he blinked at the burnt or fem female watching him with wide coppery eyes, a demon? Of course she was a demon, he sharply admonished himself. There weren’t many humans that had orange skin. Or such huge eyes, he thought wonderingly. Slowly he drew himself away. He was very much hoping to avoid any unnecessary rough sport from the demons, such as ripping out his throat or heart. He didn’t think he would find that at all to his liking. His eyes flickered to the weapons cabinet before he could stop himself. Large coppery eyes followed his. He was abruptly released and the female was smoothly backing away.

Coming to a stop right in front of the cabinet.

“Naughty, naughty,” she said in a scolding voice. Wesley flushed darkly. Feeling for all the world, like a wayward child, caught with his hand in the cookie jar.

“Who...” he tried to ask. Only managing a rasp of sound. But still, they understood what he was trying to say.

“Who are we? We're Defenders of the various guardians upstairs. I'm Chalo, Defender and mate to Kaori, Guardian of the East. Over by the cabinet is Seecha, she serves the same function to the Northern Guardian. And lazing on the couch over there is Xtchaly. He's the Defender and mate to the Guardian of the South.” As their names were mentioned, the other two demons acknowledged the humans with varying expressions of disinterest.

Cordy, as well as Fred's, mouths dropped as they took in the absolute beauty of the unmistakably male demon. Starting from his head to his expensively shod feet, he was physical perfection made flesh. If it wasn't for the color of his skin…he could have people, male and female alike, panting at his feet, and not just worshipping himher.her. Cordy smirked naughtily. Well, maybe it could be considered a form of worship.

Xtchaly sat up, a pleased look in his eyes. “I like her,” he said arrogantly, pointing at Cordelia. She straightened up, preening with the self-confidence of a very beautiful, desirable woman...

“I'm gonna ask Lexy if I can have her as a personal pet. What do you think? If I clean her up a bit, don't you think she'll look magnificent chained up at the foot of my bed?” He turned to the other Defenders, disregarding the slapped look that quickly took over Cordy's face.

The Chalo looked critically at the humans. “Mmm, I think you'll do much better with the littler one. Just imagine all that shy, blushing skin each time you step into the room...”

Xtchaly looked thoughtfuurniurning to give Fred an appraising look. “You might have a point.” He revised his mental image and pictured the girl spread out on his bed.

“Well, if you want my opinion, I think 'Fat' and 'Chance' would adequately express Lexi's opinion,” Seecha replied dryly. She flicked a glance at the slowly darkening rage that was forming on the half-breed's face.

“You think so? Maybe if I asked at just the...right moment?” The incubus raised a brow. A sly look in his slanted black eyes gave a very clear idea just 'when' that moment would be. Probably right between ‘More’ and ‘YES!’ Chalo thought cynically.

“Can't you think of anything but sex?!” Seecha finally exclaimed in amused frustration.

“Certainly, but where would be the fun in that?” He asked, looking honestly confused. The other two couldn't help their laughter.

“Will you get your mind off pleasure for a minute and think. These humans are living with the new Defender. Nof tof them bear the Mark of simply being a Blood Servant to the vampire. So what does that tell you?” Seecha asked the incubus with studied patience.

“Well, damn! I figured at least with the half-breed's status that maybe she would have lasted for more than a couple of months,” Xtchaly groused, slumping back against the couch with a resigned look.

Wesley started, finally noticing his missing lover. “Angel?! Where's Angel?!”

“The vampire or the human?” Seecha raised a brow. At the reply of ‘vampire’ her other brow shot up. “Is that his name?” she asked interestedly. “Hmpf, kinda funny name for a demon if you asked me. Oh, well...he's probably getting an earful from Lexi on his duties as a Defender and mate to the new Western Guardian.” She yawned hugely in extreme unconcern. Though her tail lashed restlessly at the look of shock that rippled across the dark-haired male's face.

“Angel's Xander Defender..?” Wesley felt his hands ball into fists. He was distantly aware that Gunn and Cordy had closed in on his sides prtivetively. Watching him with expressions of concern and pity. Every thing always seemed to circle back to Xander!

While normally he prided himself on his intellectual reasoning, choosing logic over primitive emotion, however, all he wanted to do was damn Xander to the farthest pits of Hell! Rationally, he knew the boy was not the blame, that it wasn’t fair to blame Xander. But he was tired of being fair! He was tired of being the reasonable and understanding one, he mentally sneered. Allowing all his frustration and anger to rage within.

Xtchaly’s easy, lounging position shifted subtly as the potential for violence sang in the air. He slid to his feet, his fleshy barbed tail held at the ready. Chalo glided to his right and Seecha to his left, settling into a well-verse pattern of attack and defense.

Argue they might, fight, bite and claw at one another. But they were Defenders. Even for each other’s Guardian.

endeender and MATE...” the incubus said. Putting meaningful emphasis on the last word.

“But he's my...” Wesley's voice choked to a halt under their cool, dangerous eyes.

Chalo raised a brow. “Were you Claimed by him then?” Her question, asked in a terse voice, had the other two stiffening with tension. Unusual, but it had happened in the past between human and demon. With a Defender having previously laid Clai a h a human before the Guardian. It made things extremely difficult, and frequently unpleasant, in these human modern times. Especially if neither of the humans were inclined to be reasonable.

“No, but we...”

“Irrelevant. The fact that he may have *intended* to Claim you is now without merit,” she replied swiftly, sighing in relief.

“What do you mean irrelevant?!” Cordy shouted furiously over Gunn's growling protest.

Seecha looked at the young half-demon in surprise. “Had the vampire Claimed him,” she pointed to Wesley, “...then his life would be made difficult but not impossible. Humans Claimed by vampires generally live the same length as their lovers. All he would need do is wait out the fifty years until the pairbond urges subside between the Defender and his Guardian. However, since he's only a human, he will be dead shortly.” She smiled happily at the neat solution to her brother Defender's problem. But at the murderous glares she received from the humans, her smile faltered.

As one they heard their mates rapidly descending footsteps coming down the stairs. Giving the angry humans an unreadable look, Xtchaly glided forward and bowed with the utmost respect. The three Guardians groaned silently at the telling gesture. The incubus only acted formal and deferential whenever something dangerous or diplomatic had to be done ahat hat he didn’t want to do it.

“My Honored Lord, my Gracious Ladies, the dark-haired human alleges that he was supposed to be Claimed by the vampire.”

“Alleges my ass, Bluey!” Cordy yelled, almost overwhelmed with the sheer insanity that was going on. Had Angel completely lost his fuckin' mind?! After one look at the horrible despair that filled Wes' eyes she look at him her friend again. Her mind fled to a time in the past. A time when she believed in the sweet kisses that she and Xander had once shared. Only to find him kissing the lips of someone else.

Back then, she knew she wasn’t perfect. She was too demanding, too opinionated, but for Xander she tried to change. Tried to smooth of of her abrasive edges. Not just for him, though he was the catalyst, but because she liked the new person she was becoming.

Reasonable, unreasonable, she just didn’t care! And these numbnuts were calling him a Guardian?! She snorted in contempt. Hell, she wouldn't trust Xander’s idiot ass to guard a piece of cotton. In a crunch, she grudgingly admitted, he could toss out some really cool ideas, but trust the world to his hands?!

Are they crazy?!

Lakti glanced at the distraught young mortal. He remembered reading about the downfall of a previous Guardian. The despair that existed in the Defender’s Claimed human. It was written by his predecessor how the woman’s mind had slowly spiraled downward into madness. A caldron of seething hatred and jealousy towards the Guardian. Turning a beautiful young being into a scheming, lying caricature of herself. It all culminated into one shattering act of betrayal…

“Kill him,” he ordered harshly. His eyes were almost as cold as Kaori's. They were both aware of the trouble a Claimed human, not to mention another demon would bring into this fragile, newborn relationship. The human part of the pairing had very little protection against his or her Defender. Against outside influences, the pair were nearly indestructible ...but so early in the bonding process the human part of the equation was far weaker than the demon.

The four Hyperion eyes widened in disbelief at the heartless command. They ducked, frantically seeking cover from the bows that appeared in the three demons hands. Lakti and Kaori's right hands began glowing with near incandescent light.

“NO!” Lexi shouted desperately. She cast an impenetrable shield over the crouching humans, stepping between the two groups.

~“Step aside Lexi. The human needs to be removed before he has a chance to cause any dissent between the Guardian and his Defender.”~ Kaori stated calmly, her deadly power checked for the moment.

~“Ka, this is something that Xander and Angel need to weather...together.”~ The younger Guardian pleaded.

~“I've seen first hand what trouble a Claimed human can cause, much less an UnClaimed one. It took years for one of *your* predecessors to recover from that foolish woman's meddling!”~ Lakti snapped angrily.

~“I know. I, too, have read the diaries of Elena and Vld. How that tragic pairing ended in their mutual deaths. But I've also read what the Southern Guardian, Pablo Cordoveza said about what took place between he and his Defender N'Dat. He wrote that if it hadn't been for all that they went through, that they never would have learned to appreciate what they had in each other. Stubborn pride and determination forced them to work even harder to surmount the obstacles in their union. Two males bonded together, same but enormously different outlooks on life and love. They were strangers to each other yet it only took them a mere 17 years to solidify their bond.”~ She pleaded, looking at each Guardian earnestly.

~“Lakti, how long did it take you and Seecha...27 years, wasn't it? And you, Ka...it was how many years for you and Chalo?”~ Lexi inquired softly.

~“32 ...”~ was the quiet response.

The senior Guardians exchanged thoughtful looks. Then Lakti smiled slowly at Lexi. ~“For the first time, I'm starting to see the wisdom of allowing our younger siblings to guide our actions. They are closer to their humanity than we.”~ he remarked to Ka.

Gunn, Cordy, Fred and Wes slowly lowered their arms at the severe lack of burning pain they had expected to feel. Blinking in confusion, they looked at each other before turning their attention to the six frowning individuals with wary curiosity. Not that they were in any hurry to die but still...

Lakti closed his hand, extinguishing his signature power, that of an expanding fire bolt. While Ka closed her arctic ice spear with a heavy sigh.

“Well, *I* would still like to kill him,” Xtchaly stated loudly and drew back his bow. Then he laughed heartily when the humans ducked. “Aw, we’re just fucking with you!”

“They certainly can move fast, can't they?” he commented cheerfully to Chalo.

“Me next!” Both females cried as they drew a bead on the humans. They laughed uproariously when the four fell to the ground.

“Will you stop playing with them?!” Lexi shrieked in exasperation. She sighed, they were worse than little kids.

Lakti looked at the humans and sighed. “While I don't believe you'll listen, I still feel the need to speak and, for your sakes heed my words of caution, leave Xander and Angel alone. Their bond will proceed however strong your feelings are. You can hinder it, and you may deal immeasurably harm, but you will not be able to stop them. By interfering in matters that no longer concern you, you will only cause unnecessary delay and pain for Angel. And for Xander.”

He regarded the cold looks three of the humans were giving him. He was an astute reader of many languages of the world. Currently they were silently shouting 'Fuck you'. Lakti flicked a glance at the wary, slightly built girl standing a bit apart from the others. He hoped that perhaps with her, Xander will find a refuge.

With a quick exchange of glances, the Guardians and Defenders simply vanished. Leaving Angel's friends staring at each other.


Upstairs Xander gazed at Deadboy's rigid back. “What are we gonna do..?” He asked anxiously. Then he flinched at the savage glare the vampire turned on him.

“*I* am going out...” Angel announced tightly. “I'll be back tonight...” he growled. Spiteful satisfaction rising at the blush that colored the boy's cheeks and the way Xander dropped his eyes. Good! He should feel embarrassed, ashamed...something, Angel thought coldly as he stormed out of the room. He moved at a rapid pace downstairs, steadfastly ignoring Wes and the others attempt to get his attention. He wasn't in the mood for questions, concern or pity. He just wanted to be alone. Away from their questions.

And especially away from Xander.

Wes stood there stunned as he watched Angel's swiftly retreating back.

“C'mon man, let me take you home...” Gunn's voice was quiet, though inside he wanted to punch someone. He couldn't decide who he was more pissed at...Angel for letting this damn shit start or that skinny ass upstairs for even coming here. Or maybe even himself for blowing his chance with English.

God knows he had plenty of opportunity to make his move when Wes had gotten shot, but nooo he had to try to play 'noble'. Trying to act like he was better than Angel, who he knew Wes had a thang for. What he should have been doing was paying some serious attention to Wes' dick. Night and day as English was sitting in that damn wheelchair. Give him a little taste of what he was going to be getting once he was out of the chair. By the time he was through, the only thought in his boy's head would have been Charles Gunn.

Cordy glared at Angel's retreating back. Ain't that just like him! Things get too emotional, and it's 'Oh Cordy, I think I forgot to turn the lights off at the office, I'll be right back'. And guess who has to clean up his mess?!

Then slowly her eyes turned to the stairs. Narrowing her eyes, she knew just where to trace the blame for this lovely mess. With a growl reminiscent of her boss, she stomped upstairs, ignoring Fred's stammering protestations to come back.

Not this time. No, this time Xander was going to be the one to pay! For Dennis, for Wesley...for everything.

She burst into the room startling Xander who jumped in fright.

“You just had to come here and screw things up, didn't you? What's the matter, good ole Sunnydale becoming a little to small for ya?” she sneered coldly.

“Cordy...” He gasped softly and began backing away from her. He had an instinctive feeling that it was crucial to put as much distance between them as possible. For her sake as well as his. Because his gut was screaming that despite Angel's current stage of anger towards him right now, the vampire wouldn't like it if Cordy got her hands on him. Not that he would like it either, but the difference was, he wouldn't kill her.

“Save it! You know, call me a fool but I honestly thought you had changed. That you weren't playing games with people’s lives anymore. I changed! Willow apparently changed! Why couldn't you?! Why?! What about Spike? You think he's gonna calmly accept the fact that Angel's fucking your ass now? That you are his grandsire's mate instead of his?! You know as well as I do what that lunatic is gonna do!” She screamed furiously at him, blinking through tears of rage.

Xander swallowed heavily, his eyes stinging with tears as well. “But Cordy I...”

“I...I...I...it's all about you! Are you that damn twisted that you'll fuck someone you hate just to get your jollies, huh? When will you grow up?!”

He sidled away from her deadly advancement. “I can’t stop him!” Xander screamed at her, but in, a , a litany of ‘My fault! My fault!’ pounded through his mind. He began to shake his head frantically, not knowing what else to say or do. “I'm sorry!” Xander blurted out desperately. He flinched at the withering scorn in her eyes.

“Not as sorry as I'm gonna make you,” Cordy promised harshly and leapt at him. But living on the Hellmouth made you nimble and quick. He darted into the bathroom and hurriedly slammed the door. Locking it, he slid down to the floor, hugging his knees to his chest, his breath hitching in his throat.

“Open this damn door!” She raged furiously. Hammering on the door with angry fists. “You'll have to come out sometime,” she called through the door.

“Oh, no I don't...” Xander mumbled as he finally heard her retreating footsteps. Crawling to the shower he turned it on. And curling up on the floor, he cried for his amazingly fucked up life.


By midnight Angel began to feel a slow burning sensation in the pit of his stomach. With a sigh, he descended from his perch halfway across town. Either he was hungry or this was a sign that it was time to...and his mouth twisted in disgust.

Reaching the hotel he climbed the stairs with a cold, set face. Entering his bedroom he ignored the wide-eyed boy standing by the curtained windows.

“Angel, I...” Xander began. He wanted to work this out...or better yet figure out a way that they could get out of this mess he had gotten them into. He felt the fire burning in his body and assumed that it was the bond starting up. But all he wanted was a little time. Time to talk. To reason this stupid situation out.

“I'm gonna take a shower. I suggest you get into the bed and prepare yourself or you might be in for a rough night.” The vampire said tersely before disappearing into the bathroom with a noisy slam of the door.

For a few seconds Xander gazed at the closed door in disbelief. He heard the shower come on and dithered for a few more seconds wondering if Deadboy was serious. Then he shuddered, serious or not he wasn't taking any chances. Either he got fucked the hard way or the easy way. Hmmm, let me see....and he hurriedly began rummaging through Deadboy's drawers. Searching for something, anything to use as a lubricant. Xander whimpered softly when he heard the water slow then stop, his urgency increasing. He was shaking when he finally located a bottle of lotion. Wasn't lube but hell, he ain't got time to be picky.

Dropping his pants, he climbedo tho the bed. His face screwed up in a grimace of pain at the burning sensation of stretching himself. It sure was a helllot lot easier when Spike did...

He gasped at the soft explosion of pain that went off in his head seconds before the bathroom door was almost wrenched off its hinges.

“Dammit, Xander...!” Angel roared, then he advanced on the boy with a growl. He paused, sniffing at the smells in the room before he continued his forward motion. His eyes slowly becoming liquid gold.

“Deadboy, listen, can't we just talk about this for a few minutes?” Xander pleaded, scrambling under the covers as golden eyes locked onto his. His gut clenched, fierce arousal singing in his veins.

“Enough talk...” Angel growled softly, pouncing on the boy and bearing his protesting, wiggling prey to the bed. He disregarded the frantic hands trying to push him away. It didn't matter, because soon the squirming body would be trying to get closer instead of away.

He was quickly proven right.

Xander moaned in distress as he felt himself losing all thoughts of resistance. Incredible sparkling pleasure shimmied throughout his body, setting fire to his mind and soul. All he wanted...needed was his mate. Filling him. Taking him. Completing him.

Long into the night and early morning Guardian and Defender bonded.

Hatred. Mistrust. Ill-will. It was all thrust aside, ignored as they coupled frantically caught in the urgent grip of the pairbond. Time and again, Angel reached for Xander after a short rest or even shorter nap. They were never completely satisfied. He was never satisfied. Hungry to feel heated, silken walls flexing smoothly around his hard length. And he was never denied. His mate met him eagerly each time. Hot, sweaty flesh slid against him wantonly. Lustfully.

Then Angel finally filled Xander one last time and they both felt the wild urgency recede, dissipating as dawn broke the sky.

As his mind returned, Angel stared down into Xander's dazed eyes. Both were breathing raggedly. Then with expression of bitter self-loathing slowly filled his eyes, Angel unceremoniously pulled out from the moist sheath and stumbled to his feet.

Grabbing his pants from the floor, he slid them on. Leaving without a backwards glance at the young man laying, shattered, in the rumpled bed.

Xander slowly curled into a shivering ball of misery as hot tears of disgust leaked from his eyes. Bile churned sickening in his stomach and he lurched painfully for the bathroom, dry heaving into the toilet. Coughing, he managed to get to his feet and stepped into the shower. Turning the water on as hot as he could stand it, he let the heat ease the raging pain in his sore backside. As the throbbing settled into a dull ache, he figured that it was the healing factor at work.

Sighing harshly, he exited the shower and avoided looking in the mirror. Though he knew having sex with Deadboy was due to the Bond he still felt like a slut for enjoying it, and that he was cheating on Spike.

Eyeing the rumpled bed, his mouth tightened. If Deadboy could sleep elsewhere, then so could he. With a set face, he put on his robe before grabbing his little bit of belongings and snuck out of the room.

Looking hastily around, though for who considering the only ones that had permanent status was him, Deadboy and Fred. He headed for the elevator, determined to put as much distance as possible between him and THAT room. When it was time, he would return. Otherwise, hasta la vista, he thought bitterly.

Exiting the elevator on the third floor, and so lost in his despondent thoughts, he failed to notice Fred's wide-eyed stare. After Angel finally coaxed her out of her bedroom, she had taken to roaming the floors of the hotel very early in the morning, unable to rest. Since it was just her and Angel staying here, she didn't think anyone would mind. That is, her wandering about.

Initially she had frozen, then blushed when she had heard Angel and Xander screaming and had quickly left the second floor. But to her surprise a couple hours later the elevator dinged and HE stepped off. The one everyone was mad at. Fred wanted to say something really mean and nasty but five years of being a slave had cured her of speaking hastily. Then she returned thoughtfully to her room. She couldn't help but wonder at the halting way Xander moved.


Angel came slowly downstairs shortly after 9 am. His eyes shifted smoothly from human to demon then back to brown at the sight of Cordy sitting at the desk filing her nails. He glanced at Gunn's closeprespression and sighed at the deliberate way Wes was avoiding his eyes. The way all three were virtually ignoring his presence. But still he needed to say this no matter the hurt he caused to spare them all much pain later.

He had smelled the intense rage in the bedroom and unless he stopped it now, he would wind up hurting someone to protect Xander. In the battle between his friends and his newly formed instinct to protect his guardian, he had a grim premonition that things would end...badly.

“Cordy, Gunn, Wes...I need to say that I'm sorry, actually you can't conceived the depths of my sorriness...” Angel began gravely.

“Oh, I think we know how 'sorry' you are,” Cordy muttered derisively under her breath.. She gave him a sparkling glance of contempt.

“...but you need to leave Xander alone.”

A cold silence spread outward in the wake of his quiet deliberate words.

Gunn straightened slowly in disbelief, while Cordy paused in her manicure. Wes turned his back on Angel, not willing to let his ex-lover see him in any more pain.

“Say what?!”

“Excuse me?!” Cordy snapped. “After everything he's done...you're protecting HIM?!”

“You don't understand...”

“Ya damn right!” Gunn shouted, his eyes flashing with furious rage.

Angel continued steadily, “...but between being a Defender to Xander's Guardian, everything that I am is screaming that I must protect him.”

“Oh, so one night with him and you're abandoning us?!” She screeched in outrage. Then at a flicker in Angel's eyes, sick realization settled. “You damn bastard...” she breathed.

Gunn's eyes narrowed. He darted a quick look at Wes' stiffening back and started forward to rip Angel to pieces.

A muscle twitched in Angel's pale face. “You don't understand!” Rage at this horrible position he was in pushing him almost to the breaking point.

“Oh, I think we understand real good,” his Seer sneered. “He must be a real good fuck for you to forget about your real friends! I gave you another chance the last time you kicked us to the curb! And buddy, you've lost your free pass with me!”

“Tell me Cordy, how long can you hold your breath? Gunn, can you stop your heart from beating and live? Or how about you Wes, why don't you turn off that busy brain of yours for a few minutes,” Angel said into the charged atmosphere.

“What the hell are your talking about?” Gunn growled, his initial hot rush checked by Angel’s words.

“Well, Cordy said that Xander was a good fuck. But you see, good or bad it don't matter. I can't stop myself from going to him no more than she can hold her breathe for 10 minutes or you to stop your heart from beating. All my instincts scream that I must protect him. It overrides everything else in me. And if you hurt him, it'll haunt me but you'll still be dead,” he replied painfully, at Cordy’s look of mounting horror. “I won't be able to stop myself. I smelled you in the room. I smelled your rage, Cordy. And it was only because I didn't smell Xander's pain that I didn't hunt you down last night,” he added in a half-whisper.

Wes turned slowly around, his eyes blank. “You'll kill her because she hurt Xander? And me? What about me?”

Angel looked away. “I have limited control when it comes to protecting him.”

“I think I need a drink,” Wesley said into the silence.

Giving Angel a blank look, Cordy grabbed her purse. What Angel said, she had to think about it. There had to be a way around the problem. “Good idea. Want some company?” Casting a glance at Gunn she jerked her head to the door. “Gunn?”

Angel sighed and ran a hand tiredly through is hair. Looking up, he gave the lurking Fred a weary glance. “Gonna desert me too?”

She gave him a shy, hesitant smile. “No, but they'll be back. I'm sure once they calm down things will...will...they'll...” Fred stammered to a halt under the unamused bark of laughter from him.

“I don’t think there's no coming back from this,” Angel replied shortly, looking away.

“But they're your friends and Wes...” she flushed in embarrassment as the vampire gave her a brief smile.

“Friends that think I threw them over for a piece of ass.” He said with deliberate crudeness.

Fred flinched at his words. “After they calm down, I'm sure they'll see that you have no choice.” Her words and voice were earnest as she tried to convince him.

“Well, I hope you're right but I doubt it. When Xander gets up tell him I've gone searching for more information on those shadow things from Sunnydale.”

“I will,” she called after his retreating back then jumped when she turned and saw Xander. One glance and she knew he heard everything that had been said. Biting her lip anxiously she watched him turn away. Blinking she wondered when he had eaten. She couldn't remember him venturing downstairs the previous day. He had to be starving.

“Are you hungry?” She blurted out and saw him stiffen.

“Aren't you worried about what the others would say about your fraternizing with the enemy?” Xander asked with a bitter, mocking half-smile. But she could see the sadness and the self-revulsion in his eyes. “I might have cooties, you know.”

Fred looked at him and gave him a tentative smile of her own. “No, they're always trying to get me to act more...more so, I'm acting!” Fred gave him a fierce look.

He laughed. She was like a kitten pretending to be a lion.

“Cordy will eat you up and spit you out,” he smiled sympathetically when she seemed to deflate.

“Well, you think if we hurry they'll know?” she gave him a trembling smile. But he could see the fear and worry in her large eyes, and right now, he needed somebody that didn't look at him like he was that stuff you scrapped off your shoes.

“Ahhhh, a woman after my own heart. Willing to break the rules and quite sneaky about it.” He grinned cheerfully at her. Then his face grew serious. “But if they come back too soon you better start yelling at me so you don't get into trouble with them,” he continued warningly as he walkeowlyowly down the stairs.

“I'm not scared of them!” She claimed with shaky defiance.

Again Xander had to laugh. “I'm bigger and stronger than you. I've been fighting demons, trolls and a goddess. Cordy, Gunn and Wes scare the hell outta me. Especially Cordy!”

They exchanged conspiratorial smiles. “Me too,” Fred whispered.

They maintained their secret burgeoning friendship. It was something he clung to with all his strength in the succeeding days.

Cordy and Gunn, seeing as how miserable and despondent Wes was without Angel made it their life’s work to see that Angel and the ex-Watcher spent long hours of quality time together. Unknowing of the price being paid for their efforts each time they guilted Angel into spending more time with Wes. Staying later each night until his need for Xander was a raging fire in his veins.

By the time he reached the hotel, he was hardly in control of his mind, much less his actions. Only the overriding urge to bond with Xander ruled him, short-circuiting all rational thoughts as he headed up the stairs. Aterwards, once the fire died away he would leave the room without a backwards glance.

It was left to Fred to help Xander stumble to the room he called his own over the next few days….

On the second next night after the surprising revelation of Xander and Angel’s status, Fred came across a naked Xander slumped against the wall. She almost cried out at the look of deep pain on his face. Her eyes dropped to the livid claw marks scoring his chest. She must have made some noise as his eyes fluttered opened.

“My God, what happened?!” She whispered as she hurried forward when he started sliding to the floor. She searched the hall desperately for whatever horrible creature was lurking in the halls that Xander must have run across.

“Nothing happened...” he gritted out as Fred slid her slight shoulder under his arm, helping to prop him up. He gasped when a broken ribs protested his move.

Grimly, with a set face, she helped him stumble to the third floor and his bedroom. Easing him on the bed, she gave him a worried frown.

“Xander...” she began nervously, twisting her hands in her shirt. Her eyes darting over his body with uneasy eyes, abruptly blushing when she realized he was naked. She quickly threw the covers over him.

“Fred, leave it!” Xander rasped out, an unmistakable edge to his voice. He closed his eyes, cursing himself at her scared flinch at his angry voice. Opening his eyes, he gave Fred a crooked smile. “Look, please don't worry about it. Just don't say anything to the others. I'll be perfectly fine in a couple of hours,” he gave her a confident grin.

“Well, alright. But I'll be back with some food later on,” she said unhappily. She bit her lip as she watched him close his eyes before turning and heading towards the door.

“Fine...and thanks,” Xander mumbled, already falling to sleep.


With renewed resolve, the young woman was determined to take care of him. She just wished the others could see what she saw whenever they looked at him. They were all heroes and noble warriors. They helped people. She just knew that they would help Xander if they could see him looking like this. At least she hoped they would. Fred didn't think Angel was such a caring, noble warrior after all. Not if he could do this to Xander.

Fred sighed as she gathered something edible that Xander could eat. She didn't know whether to kept her promise to him or not. Angel...Gunn and Cordy needed to know. Maybe they would be able to stop Angel from hurting Xander anymore.

She gasped when she backed away from the refrigerator at the sight of the dark haired Seer leaning casually in the doorway. Staring at her with suspicious eyes.

“Pretty big breakfast for such a skinny little thing like you,” Cordy threw out with narrowed eyes.

“Uhm...I was just going...that is...” Fred stammered, her face paling as she stared at the other girl.

“I just know that you're not taking that tray up to Xander, now are you? Because last I looked, this hotel didn't have maid service. I should know, as many times as I've asked Angel to get one,” the other girl said with a raised brow and twisted smile. At Fred's frantic stuttering 'No' Cordy pushed off from the door. She sauntered further into the kitchen and sat at the table.

“Tell you what, why don't I sit right here while you eat breakfast? Girltalk, ya know? Then we can go help our *friend* Wesley research the Dark Shadows thingies playing in Sunnydale?” She added brightly. “Besides, if Xander's that hungry, I'm sure that we'll see his, oh so charming face down here.” But the wide smile Cordy gave Fred didn't fool the slighter built girl one bit. Last time she had seen a smile like that, she was still a slave of Pylea and was being beaten. They stared at each other in silence. Then Fred lowered her head and began eating.

Unspoken between the two women was the fact that they both knew that Xander wasn't going to take one step down the stairs. Not as long as Gunn or Cordy was there. And especially not after his first disastrous appearance in the lobby after the other Guardians left the hotel. The coldness was so thick and blatant that Fred knew if she was Xander there was no way in hell that she would come downstairs again when THEY were present.

Unfortunately, it was three against two in the little war going on with Angel's oblivious disinterest. HE could escape the hotel, get away from the silent strangling tension that oozed around them. Darting off with one or two of the other three as they chased after a demon in a vision Cordy had.

But there was always either Gunn or Cordy still in the hotel until late at night, preventing Xander from coming down the stairs and eating.

The dark-skinned warrior and Seer kept to the letter of Angel's admonishment but not to the spirit. Fred sighed again as she spooned up a bite of cereal. For such a smart man, Angel was such a...a...dork, she thought guiltily.

He should have known what would happen. His friends were loyal to each other. Very l. H. Hurt one of them, and you would have all of them after you.

But by the second time of helping an injured Xander upstairs, Fred couldn't help herself.

“Xander, if you don't tell me what's goin' on, I'm gonna ask Angel,” she dared say with shaky bravado.

“Whatever...” he muttered dismissively. His lips were in a thin bloodless line as Fred wrapped his mending broken arm with a torn sheet, immobilizing it. Initially he thought he was going to pass out from the pain when the bones shifted in his arm, aligning themselves together. By the time Fred showed up, the pain had settled to a sharp throbbing pain. Which neatly canceled out the nagging pain in his ass, he thought with rising hysteria. He clamped an iron control over his fear. There had to be a way out of this...mess. Damn, there must be some serious panicking up there with the PTB when they found out that the Zeppo was the one chosen for this damn job. Maybe they were trying to get Deadboy to kill him so they could find a much better qualified Guardian.

“I don't have anything to lose…” Fred said after a few seconds of silence. She met Xander's eyes with quiet resolution. She hadn't survived all those years as a slave by being weak and unwilling to take chances.

Xander's face tightened in embarrassment, he looked away in shame. “There's a set time that we need to be...together,” he began reluctantly. “It’s an urge that grows and the longer we are not...together the more it increases. When Angel gets here...” he stopped and refused to meet her horrified eyes.

“But...I thought you...” and her face burned red when his surprised eyes shot up. “I mean, not that I listen but you two are just LOUD...” she said in a breathless rush. Now Xander's face matched her red face.

“By the time we get to that point, I'm just as gone as he,” the young man mumbled.

“He rapes you...” Fred’s voice was flat as she got to her feet.

“NO!” Xander protested loudly, getting to his feet angrily.

“Then where did the broken arm come from? Or the ribs?” She challenged him bravely and hardly flinched at his furious glare.

“You don't understand...!”

“Fine! Then explain to me how rape isn't rape...” she replied quietly, calming slightly at the upset look in his eyes.

“Have you ever seen Angel crazy and psycho bad side? His name is Angelus. And whenever Deadboy comes through the door, that's who he looks like. That's who I see, and I get scared every time. So I fight. Against him...against me...against this...this thing that's between us.”

“Against feeling like nothing but a dirty whore every time he gets up and walks away,” he whispered painfully, his throat tight from his need to scream.

“You need to talk to him, Xander...” Fred responded softly, her heart tearing at the look of self-disgust on his face.

Xander laughed bitterly, turning away from her sympathetic gaze. “whatwhat a good idea! Why didn't I think of it before?! I'm such an idiot for not thinking of talking to Deadboy as soon as he walks through that door.” Then he cursed softly at the shuttered look that came over her face. “Fred, I think this arm is affecting me more than I thought. Please don't say anything to the others. It's bad enough without them getting in the middle. I would much rather not see their happy smiles at this situation,” he finished with a weary smile.

“Fine, I won't say anything but I'll help you figure out a way to talk to him,” she replied as she helped him back to the bed. “You got enough to eat?”

“Yeah, and thanks for making that run to the store for me,” and he gave her a smile of appreciation before he yawned.

“Go to sleep, we'll figure something out when you wake,” Fred promised gently, stroking the tumbled locks away from his drawn face. She stayed at his side until she was sure he was asleep before quietly retreating from the room.

Slowly Fred descended to the lobby, ignoring the cool look on Gunn’s face. All this time that she had been pining after him, now she wasn’t so certain he was worthy of her love. Not that he would have wanted her anyway. Him or Wes. However, all three of them were acting like…like buttheads, she thought determinedly. Giving the Gunn and Cordy a cold glare of her own, the slight young Texan headed towards the kitchen. Leaving two surprised, troubled people behind.

Cordy in particular was struggling to avoid the horrible guilty feeling in her heart. Justifying her treatment of Xander with the recitation that he deserved it. That he was still the insensitive, useless jackass from high school. But a couple of things were making her question her feelings.

She would never forget the feeling of humiliation, anger and terror when her parents lost everything. Money, status...material goods. All the things she had took for granted. She had always been the rich bitch. Emphasis on the rich. Her whole identity was wrapped up in the fact that SHE had money and everybody else…didn’t.

She couldn’t BE anything else, not at that time. It was too soon and too fast. Appearances had to be maintained. Especially the appearance that her family still had money. She was willing to do anything to make sure no one found out or suspected the truth. With the prom was coming up, she was particularly anxious to keep up her image of the rich and beautiful Cordelia Chase.

Desperate enough to get a job to pay for her prom dress.

Then Xander found out her secret.

And after the way she had treated him after they broke up, she knew he would gloat and eagerly spread the word about her fallen status. God knows she mocked him enough about his family and their less than affluent position. She waited on tenderhooks, wondering if the next day the whole school would be watching her, laughing at her.

Oh, how the mighty have fallen!

But that didn’t happen. What happen was Xander paid off her prom dress. He didn’t have much of a job and even less money. Yet he sacrificed what little he had so she could still keep up her appearance.

But one selfless act does NOT mean he changed, she argued with herself. He probably reverted back to that stupid, clowning fool he was in high school.

How do you know that? whied aed a sly voice in her mind. After all, you shook the dust of Sunnydale off your shoes and never looked back. So, what do you really know about him?

The Seer slammed the door on that voice. Stubbornly holding on to her perception of her former boyfriend. Xander was a silly fool and a bigger idiot, she insisted hollowly to herself. Despite what they shared in the past, Wesley had been more of a friend to her than she had ever allowed any of the Sunnydalers to be. They had been through too much for her to not stand at his side in this mess.

Gunshots, demon pregnancy, madness, fire and God knows what else. She owed it to Wesley.

She hardened her heart against the charitable feelings she had for Xander.


Angel felt the familiar fire beginning to ignite in his veins and shifted restlessly on Wes' couch. Soon he would need to leave and he would hate crashing his car into a building or somebody while in the grips of the pairbond urge.

This was the fifth time Cordy and Gunn managed to get him to his former lover's apartment. Not that he was unhappy about spending time with Wes or seeing those soft blue eyes glow with pleasure when the door was opened. But it was just that he was feeling increasingly guilty every morning, and with a nasty taste in his mouth. Plus he felt like he was stringing Wes along before he was forced to return to the hotel and doing his...duty to Xander. It just kept leaving a horrible aftertaste in his mouth.

He sighed, ignoring the simmering urge to go home for the time being. After five days, he felt he had it fine tuned. Usually by the time he reached the bedroom, his mind was nearly gone and his body's responses had taken over. The only thing he could remember clearly was touching Xander, then he didn't know anything, see anything else. Then it was over and he was staring down into Xander's sweaty flushed face. And from the tightly closed eyes and grimace the boy wore, he assumed that the young man hated this as much as he, and was just as anxious as he to get away. So he would leave and fall asleep in another room that he claimed. But for the past couple of mornings, he just couldn't get over the fact that he had done something...wrong.

“...and I'm afraid that that's about all I could find about the shadow creatures. I know it's not much to go on,” Wesley admitted with a sigh. “But details about shadowy creatures and Guardians are extremely sketchy at best.”

He gave a sidelong glance at Angel's brooding profile, then abruptly stood and began gathering his research notes with stiff angry movements. “Go home Angel! Obviously you do NOT wish to be here with me so I suggest you run home. I'm quite sure Xander's eagerly awaiting your return!” He said acidly, tasting the ashes of defeat.

Angel stood up slowly, his eyes regretful for the pain he caused this warm, loving man. Carefully he rested his hands on the narrow rigid shoulders. Very anxious not to set off the blinding pain this usually caused. “Wes, I'm sorry. But this thing between me and Xander has to be resolved. I feel like I'm cheating you ever time we...” he broke off when the other man whirled on him with angry glittering eyes.

“You know, I thought that I could accept whatever time you could spend with me and perhaps I could be content with that. I thought that what I felt for you was strong enough, but every time I see that look on your face I know you're thinking about him! And I realize just what a greedy person I am. I hate sharing your attention with him and I especially loathe the fact that you're shaggin' him while I can't even touch you anymore! How are we supposed to have any type of relationship in the face of this?!” The younger man yelled furiously. His chest heaving with chaotic emotions this dreadful situation pulled from him. He took several shuddering breaths, fighting for control and damning the weak tears he could feel trying to fall from his eyes.

Wes backed away from Angel's outstretched hand and firmly ignored the pleading look on the pale countenance.

“You need to leave...now,” he stated with trembling lips.

“Wes...please,” Angel said desperately.

“Just go!” The other grated out through clenched teeth, his control faltering.

Angel hesitated.

“Please...” Wes said in a shaky whisper.

With painful regret etched in every line of his body, Angel quietly left the apartment. Sharp hearing caught the muffled sobs from within the apartment as Wes' finally gave in to his pain.


He made it back to the hotel with the pairbond urging him on. With the emotional scene with Wes already shreg hig his nerves it just made it even easier to give himself over to the whole distasteful coupling, and become mindless. Losing himself in the forced pleasure of Xander's body.

Stripping off his clothes hurriedly, he approached the bed, growling slightly at the emptiness when there should be a naked body waiting for him. Briefly he wondered why in the hell did they have to do this every fuckin' night.

“Angel...” Xander remained carefully still. He kept a watchful eye on Angel as the vampire prowled towards him. His skin was jumping with fear yet the urging of the bond was like a raging inferno in his mind. But he still had a bit of reason left. Not much, though hopefully it would be enough to be able to talk some sense into Deadboy.

But his heart was racing and he was prepared to jump the instant Deadboy lunged at him. The demonic face on the vampire scared the hell out im. im. All he could see was Angelus. “We need to talk a...” his words were cut off when Deadboy seemed to blur and then he was slammed onto the bed. He yelled in shock and giving in to his instincts, he fought. Trying to avoid the coupling as he did every night.

He cried out hoarsely and almost managed to scramble out of the bed, when his wrist was seized and he was thrown face down onto the bed. His struggles quelled by his wrist twisted behind his back and jerked. Xander gasped in pain, nearly passing out at the sudden crack as the bones separated in his wrist. Then at the wet touch of the wide blunt head that lunged into him, he felt his mind dissolve. Once again, the fire in his blood raged out of control, consuming him. The only thing that existed for him was the wonderful feeling of rightness, of again being united with his mate.

Throughout the night, each time Angel reached for him, he would gravitate eagerly into the cool embrace. Briefly struggling away when his broken wrist was jarred, pain clearing some of the cloud of lust damping his mind. But still he moved back into Angel's arms, writhing in the overriding ecstasy. When claws sank into his back to anchor him firmly onto Angel's granite length, the pain was washed away in the screaming pleasure their union brought.

Slowly the mist cleared from their brains. Xander collapsed on the bed, breathing raggedly. His wrist was throbbing with sickening agony and his back...his back felt like it was on fire. Save for his ragged breathing, he silently waited for Angel to leave. But this time, he was surprised by Deadboy falling asleep, and with a heavy arm draped over his hip. Each time he tried to carefully wiggle away or lift it, Deadboy would growl sleepily and tighten his grip, digging claws painfully into his thigh.

Finally with a painful, frustrated sob Xander decided to wait it out. Hoping that Deadboy would wake up and leave or maybe even he could escape once the vampire was fast asleep. His mind, racing frantically as he tried various means of getting away, that the boy was hardly aware that he had also slipped into a deep relaxing sleep in the arms of his Defender and mate.