Soul Mates

I've created a new mailing list, Ravenhawk's Fanfic. It's going to serve as an archive for Soul Mates and the rest of my fiction. I'll continue to post new chapters of Soul Mates here, but there may be things I'll post to that list that I won't post anywhere else. I haven't decided yet.

Feel free to head on over and sign up. Here's the address:

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ravenhawkfic/

Notes, disclaimers, etc. are in part 1. One other note: If anyone out there has any artistic talent and would like to try doing some fanart for this series, please email me at ravenhawk450@gmail.com. I'd be greatly appreciative!

****

Part 2

After Xander left, Willow threw the class schedule down on the table.

"I can't believe him!" she fumed. "Can you believe him? I was trying to help him see how good this would be for him, and he gets *mad* at me for that?"

Tara took a moment before replying. She was upset with Xander too - he shouldn't have lost his temper the way he did - but the truth of the matter was that Willow *had* been pushing him. He hadn't been justified in reacting the way he did, but this wasn't *all* his fault.

So the first thing she had to do was get Willow to see that. Then they could worry about Xander.

"Willow, honey..." she said, "Xander shouldn't have snapped at you like that, but did you really need to push him like you did?"

Willow frowned. "So you're taking his side?" she asked, giving her an accusatory look.

Tara sighed. "I'm not on anyone's side," she soothed, resting a hand on Willow's shoulder and rubbing her softly. "There shouldn't even be any sides here. We all love each other, right? So we're all on the same side."

Willow didn't say anything, but Tara could see her relax a little, so she continued. "Now, I'm not defending him for snapping at you," she said, "but I can understand why he was getting annoyed. You were pushing him toward a decision he's not ready to make yet."

Willow opened her mouth to reply, but Tara continued quickly, forestalling her. "You were," she said. "Wouldn't you get irritated if he did the same thing to you?"

"But this is different," Willow replied. "Xander would be so much better off if he went to college. I'm just trying to help him see what's best for him."

Tara took Willow's hand and led her over to their couch. They sat down, facing each other, and Tara stroked Willow's hand gently as she drew it into her lap. "Maybe you're right, sweetie," she said. "Maybe going to college would be best for Xander." She shrugged. "But we don't know that for sure. And anyway, Xander's an adult. This is his decision. We can tell him what we think, but.... He has to make his own choice here."

Silence settled over the room as Willow looked into her eyes for a long moment. "You're right," she said at length, and relief washed over Tara as she saw Willow relent. "It's just so frustrating, you know? It *is* his choice, but I don't want to see him make the wrong one."

"Honey.... College is the right choice for *you,*" Tara said. "It might not be the right choice for Xander. I mean, maybe it is, but...." She shrugged again. "We have to leave this up to him."

"He still shouldn't have snapped at me, though," Willow said, frowning slightly.

"You're right," Tara said, nodding. "He shouldn't have done that."

"But.... I guess I *was* pushing him too hard," Willow continued, looking down at her lap.

Well. *That* was good to hear. Tara loved Willow with all her heart, but there was no denying that her girlfriend had her flaws. And one of them was that she absolutely hated to admit it when she was wrong. So if she was willing to admit her part in making this fight happen, that was a big deal for her.

"Oh no," Willow said suddenly, her forehead creasing with worry. "I was being totally unreasonable, wasn't I? What if Xander's still angry? What if...."

"Shh," Tara said, silencing her. She reached out and touched Willow's cheek, smiling comfortingly as her girlfriend looked up at her. "It's okay. It's not that bad. Really."

Her words seemed to reassure Willow, but only a little. Tara could still see concern in her eyes as Willow looked up at her. "We should go see Xander at work," she said. "Talk to him."

Tara nodded. "Not right now, though," she said, letting her hand fall to her side. "It'd be better if you both had some time to cool off first."

Willow frowned. "What do you mean?" she said. "I'm cool. In fact, I've never been cooler."

Tara paused, taking a moment to study her girlfriend closely before replying. Maybe she was right. All her anger from before seemed to have vanished, and though Tara could see that she was still a little tense, that could very well have just been anxiety over trying to make things right with Xander. And from what she'd seen of Xander just before he left, he'd probably cooled off quite a bit by now, too.

Still, it was probably better to be safe than sorry. Willow was probably still a little upset with Xander even now. And Tara needed to put a little distance between herself and this argument, too - she'd been caught in the middle of it, after all. It'd be best to wait for a bit before going to see Xander.

"Maybe so, honey, but humor me on this, okay?" Tara said. "Besides, Xander's going to be busy with work right now anyway."

For a moment, it looked like Willow might protest, but then she nodded, and Tara smiled and leaned in to give her a quick hug.

"I'm going to shower, and then I'll make us some breakfast, okay honey?" Tara said after they separated. At Willow's answering nod, she stood up and turned toward the hallway, but stopped as her eyes fell on their dining table. She sighed softly as she saw the tupperware container with the lunch she'd made for Xander still sitting on the table.

"Sweetie... look," she said, nodding toward the table. Willow turned in her seat, frowning slightly as she followed Tara's gaze.

"Xander forgot his lunch," Willow said. "We could take it to him, around noon or so."

"My thoughts exactly," Tara replied. "Kind of like a... peace offering."

Willow briefly considered her words. "Yeah," she said, smiling after a moment. "That's a good idea."

"Good," Tara said. "Now, I'll make us breakfast, and then I really need to try to get some studying done."

****

That morning at work was the worst Xander had ever had.

It wasn't that there were a lot of problems on the site. He and his crew were measuring and cutting sheetrock, and that went about as well as he could have hoped for. When lunchtime rolled around, they were even a little bit ahead of schedule.

No, what made his time at work awful was how bad Xander felt about what had happened earlier that morning.

He still couldn't believe he'd lost his temper like he had. His relationship with Willow and Tara was the best thing that had ever happened in his life, and he'd let his annoyance and frustration make him forget that. Only he could be stupid enough to be so thoughtless about something so wonderful.

His worries had gotten worse as the morning went on, and it was only when he was really starting to panic that he finally managed to rein himself in. Perspective. Perspective was a good thing, right? It was just an argument. Couples had arguments all the time and were still okay, and, sure, he and Tara and Willow weren't a *couple,* but that should still apply to them, shouldn't it?

Still, he definitely needed to apologize, and sooner rather than later. He hadn't planned to go home for his lunch break, even though he'd forgotten the lunch Tara had made for him, but it didn't take him long to change his mind. Best to go home at his first opportunity, find Willow and Tara, and beg their forgiveness. Hopefully they wouldn't still be upset with him.

He spent the rest of the morning going over what to say in his head, and doing his job as best he could in the distracted state he was in, until he was interrupted about ten minutes before lunch.

"Hey, Harris!" Xander turned at the sound of his name being shouted into the half-finished room he and his crew were working in. He looked up from the interior wall he'd been measuring and saw one of the assistant supervisors standing in a doorway across from him. "There's a couple of girls out front looking for you," the supervisor continued as Xander turned to face him. "A blonde and a redhead."

"Thanks," Xander said, and the supervisor gave him a quick nod and left. He started for the doorway, nervousness running through him at the thought of seeing Willow and Tara again, but before he reached it, he paused and turned around, facing the guys on his crew.

"Guys, just finish up the measuring you're doing and then go ahead and knock off. It's almost lunchtime anyway," he said. Not waiting for a response - not that it would have registered if there had been one - he turned again and hurried through the doorway.

He quickly made his way through the building, stopping as he stepped outside. He blinked as bright sunlight hit his eyes, and raised one hand to shade them as he looked around. It only took him a few seconds to spot Willow and Tara standing a short distance away from the building. Several of the guys around the site were staring at them, their expressions both curious and appreciative, but Xander paid them no heed as he approached his girls.

"Hi," he said, stopping in front of them and looking at each of them in turn. Willow had on a tan sundress and had a bag thrown over one arm, and Tara was wearing a medium-length dark green skirt and a short-sleeved blue shirt. Even with all the anxiety he was feeling, Xander couldn't help taking a moment to just look at them. Even though he'd been in a relationship with Tara and Willow for a couple of months now, and he'd known them a lot longer than that, there were still times when he almost couldn't believe how beautiful they were.

"Hey," Tara said, giving him a small smile.

"Hey, Xander," Willow said. She didn't smile, but he didn't see any anger in her expression or her posture, either. Xander felt no small amount of relief when he saw that.

The three of them stood together in uncomfortable silence for a moment - none of them seemed particularly eager to say anything. It didn't take Xander long to decide that since he was planning to apologize anyway, he needed to take the lead here.

Looking around, he saw that there were a few people within earshot, so he nodded toward an oak tree that stood a little ways away from the site. "Let's talk over there," he said.

"Okay," Tara said, and she and Willow followed Xander to stand underneath the tree. Xander took a moment to collect his thoughts before speaking again.

"Willow.... I'm sorry for snapping at you this morning," he said. "And Tara, I'm sorry you were caught in the crossfire like that. Both of you, I'm so sorry for how I acted, and I hope you can forgive me." His words came out in a rush, all the preparation he'd done in his head that morning forgotten, and he waited anxiously for their answer.

"I'm sorry too," Willow said, her expression betraying the nervousness she felt. "I shouldn't have pressured you like I did. It's just, you said you were thinking about going back to school, and I got excited way too early. I was planning out your schedule when you hadn't even decided if you were actually going to take any classes yet."

Xander sighed. "I'm glad to hear that, but.... Really, you should know...." He shrugged and spread his arms to his sides. "This is me. Sometimes I do stupid things. And sometimes those stupid things hurt people I really care about. I mean, I love you both, and I'd never do anything to hurt you on purpose, but I have a gift for finding the wrong things to say, and...."

"Xander, stop," Willow said, interrupting him. He could tell from her tone and her posture that she was totally serious about what she was saying and she expected to be listened to. "I've known you my whole life. And I've *always* loved you and I've never been anything but glad you were part of my life. Sure, there were times when you hurt me, but that's just part of life. It's part of being human. People hurt other people sometimes, even if they don't mean to."

"Yeah," Tara said. "Xander, it wasn't a good thing you did this morning, but don't blow it out of proportion. I haven't known you as long as Willow, but don't sell yourself short. I know you're a good person."

"You're one of the best I know," Willow said softly. "I mean, there's Buffy, and Giles, and of course you too honey," she added, turning and giving Tara a quick smile, "but you'd better believe you're right up there too," she finished, turning back to Xander and fixing him with a no-nonsense look.

Xander wasn't sure how much he actually believed what Willow and Tara were saying - he *tried* to be good, but he wasn't sure how often he actually succeeded - but it was good to hear just the same. And he could tell that *they* believed it, and that meant more to him than he could possibly say.

"Thank you," he said. "Both of you - thank you for being so understanding." He gave his girls a tight smile. "I don't know what I did to deserve you, but...." He trailed off and shook his head. It was probably best not to start down that road. "Anyway, like I said, I'm sorry I lost my temper this morning, and I promise I'll do my best not to let it happen again."

"And I'm sorry for pushing you like I did," Willow said.

"So.... Are things okay between us?" Xander asked, addressing the question to Willow and Tara both. Neither of them looked like they were still angry, but he had to ask just the same. He wanted to be sure.

"Yeah. I think so," Tara replied. "It looks like we made it through our first fight okay."

Willow frowned slightly. "You think?" she said. "There's nothing special we need to do, or...?"

"Well, there should probably be make-up sex," Tara mused, "but I don't think this is the time or the place for it."

Willow giggled, and Xander laughed along with her. "No, definitely not," Xander said. Looking past Tara and Willow, Xander could see some of the guys on his crew standing out in front of the building mingling with a few of the other workers. Occasionally one of them would glance in their direction, and Xander had no trouble guessing what they were talking about.

"We brought your lunch," Willow said, nodding toward the bag she was carrying.

"Thanks," Xander said. "Sorry about forgetting it this morning. I... had other things on my mind."

"No problem," Tara said, smiling. "And actually, we brought enough for all of us," she continued. "We were hoping we could have lunch together."

"I'd like that," Xander said. "Why don't we walk up the block to the park over there?" he suggested, pointing up the street to a park across the corner from where they were. "There are picnic tables and everything there. It's nicer than it is here."

"Sounds good to me," Willow chirped.

"Me too," Tara agreed. "Let's go." She took a step toward the sidewalk, but stopped when Xander held up his hand. She and Willow looked at him curiously, and he cleared his throat before speaking again.

"One more thing," Xander said. "I, um.... I thought about it some more, and I think I am going to try to take a class at UC Sunnydale next semester."

"Really?" Willow's face lit up at his words. "That's great.... I mean, if you're sure about it," she finished. Xander couldn't help smiling at the way she was obviously trying to contain her enthusiasm.

"Yeah," he said. "I am. This time, I'm sure." He hadn't decided anything about school until that moment, but now that he had, it felt right. "Just one class for now, and we'll see how it goes. I don't think I'll ever go back full time, and I'll have to schedule everything around work, but I'm going to give it a shot."

"Okay, *now* can I get excited?" Willow said, looking back and forth between Tara and Xander eagerly.

Tara laughed. "I think it's okay, sweetie," she said.

Willow threw herself into Xander's arms and kissed him fiercely. "Xander, honey, this is great," she enthused. "This is going to be great for you." She stepped back and gave him a big smile, and Xander reached for her hand, squeezing it softly. It was great to see her so happy, especially after this morning.

"So, what made you decide this?" Tara asked. "You weren't sure this morning."

Xander smiled at her and Willow. "You," he said simply.

His girls looked at him in confusion. "Xander, this isn't something you should do for us," Tara said. "You should do it for yourself. Because you want to."

Xander shook his head. "It's not that," he said. "It's.... I mean, you two are so wonderful, I can't even tell you. You're the best thing that's ever happened to me in my life. And when I think about you, you make me want to be the best man I possibly can."

"So, bettering myself sounds pretty good to me," he concluded.

Tara stepped in toward him and gave him a soft kiss, letting her lips linger on his for a moment. "That's really sweet, honey," she said, stepping back to stand beside Willow again and smiling happily.

"Yeah," Willow said. Then she smacked him lightly on the arm. "See, you don't always say the wrong thing," she chided, grinning at him.

Xander chuckled. "Okay, okay," he said, holding up his hands in mock surrender. "So why don't we go have lunch? These serious conversations always make me hungry."

"Sure. Let's go," Tara said, and Willow nodded her agreement.

As the three of them started down the sidewalk, heading for the park, Xander glanced back at the construction site. Over in front of the building they were working on, he could see that the half-dozen or so guys standing out front were all staring at him now. From the looks on their faces, they'd obviously seen the kisses.

He knew he was probably never going to hear the end of this from his crew, but right now, he found that he didn't care. He'd made up with his girls, and he'd made a decision about his life that he actually felt pretty good about. Right now, that was all that mattered. And even though this morning had shown him that there were going to be problems between him and Willow and Tara sometimes, he knew that he'd find a way to deal with them, no matter what it took.

Because they were worth it.

THE END