So Damn Domestic

I'm sorry it took me so long to update this story. I got a horrible case of writer's block but I'm over it now. I'll try to have the next chapter posted sooner then this one was.
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One Month Later. FPOV


And we’re on our way. We left earlier then we originally thought we were goin to. We just wanted to get out of Shasta Lake so bad. Over the last couple weeks me and B have been stayin in Lincoln for a day or two while we unload our stuff. I got the good idea of goin ahead and takin our dressers over and just keep a few outfits at the house in duffle bags. The washer and dryer still worked so why not just wear the same clothes over and over for a couple weeks? So that’s what we did. I’ll admit only to me and you that I had ulterior motives. Since we weren’t packin up everything at once and moving it all over we didn’t need Sissy’s help, so she didn’t come to our house, which means I didn’t have to hear her annoying voice and watch her hit on B. I’d like to go ahead and congratulate myself on a job well done.


And since we were stayin there we figured we’d go slayin just to get a feel for the town. And it was fuckin awesome The first night we were walkin down this jogging trail in these woods on the outskirts of the town and after walkin for about an hour we found this lake, not very big and not far off was a stream flowin into the lake and the water looked clean enough and it only took me fifteen minutes to convince B to go skinny dippin with me. After a little bit of beggin I decided the only way I was gonna get her ass in there was to make it seem like a challenge. So I stripped down and ran in and while I was wadin around I turn back to her and said ‘you aren’t scared are you?’ and she was buck-naked in a matter of seconds.


So I’m swimmin away from her ‘cause I dunked her head under the water and I look over at the shore and I see this huge dog just sittin there staring at us. Only it didn’t look like a normal dog, it looked like a werewolf. And I was so busy lookin at this thing that I didn’t even hear B come up behind me and she dunked my head under the water. But when I came back up she’s all worried and shit because she finally saw it. So I had her distract the thing by splashin around a lot and I swam over to the shore at least forty feet away from the thing. So I was fuckin bare ass naked, not a stitch on me, and I was tryin to sneak around but this thing must’ve had advanced hearin or somethin ‘cause it looked over at me with these big bright green eyes that were glowin and shit.


I fuckin froze, I had no fuckin clue what to do ‘cause the sword I brought with me just in case we ran into somethin like this was on the other side of the dog. Then he stood up and this mother fucker was almost five feet tall. And he started runnin at me, I could hear his paws push off the ground and his nails scratch the dirt as he got closer and closer. I tensed my legs up and I waited for him to get close enough and at the last possible second I jumped over him and did a somersault and jumped back up and turned around. I had dirt all over my fuckin back now and it felt gross. Anyway, this thing skids to a stop and turned around and he looked pissed. He growled so loud that some bushes right next to him shook and he charged at me again.


And I waited again just like last time only I side stepped away from him and then jumped on his back. I didn’t want this thing to bite me since I had no fuckin clue what it was. So I was holdin onto its fur for my life and he’s buckin and runnin around tryin to get me off him. I wrapped my legs around his middle and gripped onto him pretty tight. He was barkin now and it sounded so fuckin weird, deeper then a normal dog’s and a lot louder. Anyway, so I let go of him with my hands and grabbed onto his chin with one hand and the top of his head my other, and I could feel with the bottom of my foot that this was a very big boy, and I twisted his neck really fast and it snapped just like that and he fell to the ground, only he fell to the side so he had one of my legs trapped under his body. It took me a couple minutes but I finally got it free.


You have no idea how fuckin great it felt to fight somethin like that. No weak vampires for me anymore, give me the big and nasty. And I was so worked up after that slay, I could feel my blood flowin and rushin down to my pussy and before B could get out a word I jumped her and we had hot, wild, post slayin sex in the bushes by the lake. After we washed ourselves off we got dressed and put the dog thing’s body in the bushes and B got a fits full of its hair and when we got home she sent it to the slayer facility so they could hopefully tell us what it was. Turns out the thing is called an ‘il cane de morte’, which according to freetranslation.com is Italian for dog of death. Lincoln may be small, and seemingly boring, just like Sunnydale was, but it has lots of demons and vampires to keep me and B busy.


“Sister stop ” Great, what are they fighting about now? They’re sittin on the floor with some toys next to ‘em and Addy keeps tryin to take Mattie’s even though she has at least six next to her. But it doesn’t matter, she wants what he has and she’s not gonna stop buggin him about it. B puts down the magazine she was flippin through and sits down next to ‘em and keeps Addy busy so Mattie can play with his toys. And this is just a little taste of what’s to come. When Addy starts walkin it’s gonna be hell.


Ya know, our backyard is way fuckin bigger then our old one, and even with the pool B wants to build we’re still gonna have plenty of room. And I know it isn’t gonna be for a while but maybe I should get Addy a puppy for her birthday. Somethin small and fluffy ‘cause she’s a girl and most girls like small dogs. Then again I think somethin bigger would be better. A little ankle bitter wouldn’t stand a chance against her. Maybe another retriever or a shepherd or somethin.


I can’t wait to get there. Dawn’s still a little weak from the food poisoning a couple weeks ago so she and Kyle aren’t drivin over like we planned. Last week I drove B’s car over with all the stuff she had on the walls, pictures and stuff like that and most of the dishes. We have the couches and the beds and dinning set in the cargo area of the jet and we’ll just rent a U-haul at the airport or somethin. But tonight, tonight is gonna be great. We’ll unload everything and get it just the way we want and then we’ll relax. The jet lag from flyin to Nevada and back every couple days will finally catch up with us and we’ll just sleep it off and it’ll be great. The kids will be tired and pass out ‘cause they’re not as used to flyin like me and B. They’ll sleep all through the night and I’ll curl up around B and sleep, probably better then ever.


And when the jet lag wears off I’m gonna go slayin and I’m gonna have a blast. The beasties of Lincoln aren’t gonna know what hit ‘em. They’ll put up a fight and I’ll enjoy smackin ‘em down. I’m gonna slay like there’s no fuckin tomorrow. And the double H’s are gonna be wicked fierce. But I got B to help me take care of those. I’ll come home, make myself an omelet with lots of cheese and some red pepper flakes ‘cause I like spicy food. I’ll down it with a couple glasses of milk and then head to the bedroom to scratch that itch. Only I won’t be doin the scratchin. And I’ll be so worked up that it won’t take too long for me to pop, then I can show B my appreciation. What’s that saying? Oh yeah, ‘one good turn deserves another’. I’ll eat her until she begs me to stop. I’m gettin wet just thinkin about it.


“This is your captain speaking.” The kids stop playin and look around like they just heard the voice of God or somethin. I smile and look over at the camera up on the wall. I don’t know why Giles had that put in. It’s like he doesn’t trust us or somethin. What kinda shit is that? “Please return to your seats and fasten your seat belts, we’ll be landing within the next five minutes.”


Addy starts cryin ‘cause she doesn’t know where the voice is comin from. I can’t help but smile a little bit. She was asleep when the jet took off so she didn’t hear Frank talkin through the intercom the first time. Mattie wasn’t worried or nothin ‘cause he’s been on the jet before. B brings the kids over to the couch thing I’m sittin on and we buckle up. Since Addy is so small B just holds onto her as the jet starts to land. And get this, Addy actually likes it. She’s laughin and clappin her hands and B’s encouraging her so she won’t get all freaked out. I look down at Mattie and he looks how I feel, nauseous. Just a couple more minutes of this shit and we’ll be landed and then we can get the fuck outta here and relax in our new home.


Ok, you remember how I said tonight was gonna be so fuckin awesome ‘cause I was gonna have some of the best sleep ever? Well I must’ve fuckin jinxed it or somethin by sayin that, ‘cause it’s one in the fuckin mornin and me and B have been up all night tryin to get Addy to sleep. Nothin is calmin her down and I think I’m gonna go crazy. It’s all B’s fault, I won’t tell her that but we both know it is. And she knows that I know that it is. She’s the one that lost all the binkies.


We had a big bag of ‘em ‘cause Addy likes to throw ‘em across the room when she’s done suckin on ‘em and they get lost. And B swore before we left this mornin that she put them in her duffle bag. And there must be some little binkie stealin elves or somethin runnin around here ‘cause they’re gone. And the elf remark was sarcastic, I know she forgot them somewhere. I can’t take it anymore. I get out of bed and slip my shoes on. No need gettin dressed since I’m in some pajama pants and a t-shirt, and where I’m goin people probably wear dumber stuff then this.


“Faith, where are you going?” B asks as she tries to rock Addy to sleep, but it isn’t workin. That little kid has been screamin for the last hour and a half and I can’t take it anymore. I grab my keys off the nightstand and put ‘em in my front pocket. Yeah, these pajama pants have pockets, how weird is that?


“I’m goin out to find some binkies ‘cause nothin else is fuckin working.” I shouldn’t take my anger out on her but I’m just so fuckin frustrated right now. If I don’t get some peace and quiet soon I might strangle someone and I don’t like that feeling at all. It’s startin to freak me out.


“But, Faith you already checked and there’s nothing open but the gas station and they didn’t have any.” And her gettin pissed at me isn’t helpin at all. I need to get the fuck outta here so I can cool down. I know B feels the same, like she’s about to have a nervous break down but she’s better at this kinda stuff then I am. Mattie was never like this when he was a baby and B has a higher tolerance for Addy’s screamin. And this kid can hit this pitch that makes you wanna hit a wall or somethin.


“I’ll find somethin, alright?” I say soundin really irritated. I need to get outta here ‘cause the last thing we need right now is to start fightin with each other. So I leave without sayin another word. She yelled somethin at me when I opened the door but I wasn’t payin attention. It feels so good to be out of that room, you have no fuckin idea. I kinda wish Mattie had been like that when he was little, it would have prepared us for this little hell raiser. I get in my Camaro and back it out of the driveway and take off. I probably shouldn’t be goin this fast but oh well. I need to get the fuck away from here. If I had time I’d go slayin, but B’s goin through hell right now and I didn’t make it any better by just runnin out.


But now that I’m outta there I feel like I can breathe. I roll down the windows ‘cause I hate complete silence, it drives me a little insane, I can’t explain why but it just does. So I’ll just listen to the wind as I go eighty down the freeway. It’ll take me at least forty-five minutes to get there. Well, maybe a little less then that since I’m drivin faster then the speed limit. I’d be goin faster but I really don’t feel like gettin pulled over tonight. It only takes me half an hour to get to Vegas which is totally bitchin. I’ve always wanted to come here, I don’t know why I never did. If B weren’t at home goin through a livin hell I’d stop at a casino and play some poker. The reason I came here is ‘cause this place is the city that never sleeps, so they have to have some store open that sells baby stuff. Great, well I hope that gas station has some ‘cause my car’s almost runnin on empty. Why didn’t I fill it up earlier? Oh yeah, I was too worried about gettin home as soon as possible.


So, I fill up the tank which is gonna cost me at least a hundred bucks. Gas prices are so fuckin crazy. I really wish I had changed my clothes ‘cause there are some people inside that are lookin better then a million bucks and I look like hell. But fuck them. It’s not like I’m tryin to impress them or somethin. It’s not like I wanna look my best so I can show off a little, take one for a ride in my car and then a ride in my bed. Anyway, I walk in and I can tell they’re drunk from here on the smell alone. Like whiskey and somethin fruity but I can’t tell what it is. I’ve never liked fruity drinks. I walk down the isles lookin for what I need. Let’s see, they’ll probably be over by the diapers...and...yes they have some. I’ll get a six pack just in case. And they’re pink, Buffy’ll really like that. And those drunk people are still here. Great, I really hope they don’t talk to me. I just wanna get home.


“Hey.” Well so much for luck. I just nod my head in response. Maybe if I don’t talk he’ll go away. “You wanna maybe get outta here? Go somewhere a little more private. I guarantee lots of fun.” I glare at him a little. What is takin so damn long? Why isn’t this fuckin line movin? I mean it’s....one forty in the morning how many people could need to put gas in their car at one forty in the morning? I look over at the ‘player’ and his girlfriend, but I’m startin to think she is a hooker. Or just into the kinky stuff.


“Sorry, I’m engaged.” And I hold up my left hand for him to see the ring. He just gives me this little smile as he eyes my body again. If he doesn’t stop doin that I’m gonna punch him in his fuckin lips.


“So are we,” he squeezes the girl’s shoulders a little. “Doesn’t mean the three of us can’t have some fun.” I glare at him again and push passed him and his little girlfriend to the front of the line. I ignore them as they complain about me cuttin and I pay for my stuff. I gotta get back home before B has a break down or somethin. I pull up to the driveway and jump out of the car. I can hear Addy and she’s still screamin her head off. Jeez, she’s still up? I thought she’d be passed out by now. I’ve been gone for almost....nope...a little over two hours. Traffic was a bitch, and I got a little lost tryin to find the freeway. I open the bedroom door and look inside. B looks like she’s been cryin, and she’s rockin Addy back and forth and singin to her but it isn’t calmin her down. Maybe next time she’ll listen to me when I tell her to double check and make sure she has the binkies in her bag.


“Where were you?” she screams at me when I walk in the room. I hold up the package and she looks like she’s about to cry with relief. I rip it open and toss one to her. It takes three, maybe four seconds for Addy to stop cryin. Another five minutes and she’s out like a light. “Where did you get these? I thought the gas station didn’t have any.” I toss the pack on the nightstand and slip my shoes off. I take Addy from her and hold her against my shoulder.


“They didn’t. I went to Vegas, figured they’d have some kinda store open since almost every shop there is opened twenty-four hours. Sorry it took so long but traffic was a bitch.” I’m not about to admit that I got lost. I’d never hear the end of it. I take my girl into her bedroom and carefully put her down in the crib. She wakes up for a second or two but then dozes off. God, I thought this night would never fuckin end. When I go back into my bedroom B’s already passed out. I turn out the lights and crawl under the covers. Maybe tomorrow night will be better.


BPOV


These last couple days have been hell. The kids aren’t adjusting as well as I thought they would. I mean, they got used to the slayer facility pretty quick, then again Addison was a little baby then. But Matthew got used to it really quick. And Addison got used to living in our old house really fast when we went back. She was clingy and a little whiney but at least she went to sleep without too much trouble. We’ve been living here a week and every night she cries for at least two hours before she falls asleep. The pacifiers don’t help, singing, rocking her, reading to her, playing soft music, and talking to her doesn’t help. I really hope she gets over this and soon because I could really use one night of peaceful sleep.


See she doesn’t cry for two hours right off the bat. It’s a very slow process. We put her in her crib at eight o’ clock ‘cause she’s always fallen asleep on her own before. So she’ll be lying in there and she talks to herself for a while. Well, she makes noises but they sound kinda like words. Anyway, she does that for a while, and then she starts to whine, and then she calls out for us, she just says ‘mama’ but we’re trying to teach her to call Faith mama and me mommy, but she’s still to small to say mommy. Anyway, she does that for a little while and then she starts to cry and if we don’t go in there after a few minutes she starts to scream. We tried ignoring it one night, we thought that if she screamed enough she’d finally realize that we weren’t coming and she’d lay down and go to sleep, but no. She screamed for an hour and a half and it took me almost an hour to rock her to sleep.


Matthew seems to help her calm down a little quicker. A couple nights she’s actually woken him up, he can usually sleep through anything, and he came in the room to see what was goin on and he sat on the bed between Faith and me and rubbed Addison on the back while she cried against my neck. And then he started talking to her and she calmed down within minutes. And as much as we’d like to, we can’t wake Matthew up to sooth her back to sleep. It wouldn’t be fair to him if we did that. And it’s a little more then frustrating that my son can sooth my baby better then I can. But she seems to have a tight bond with him, even if she is always trying to steal his toys.


It’s really cute what she does now. They’ll be in the living room and he’ll be playing with his toys across the room from her and she’ll crawl up to him and stand up and then plop down in his lap and while he’s trying to get her off of him she grabs his action figure or whatever it is he’s playing with. It’s so funny to see, how she just plops down like she belongs there. She’s gonna start walking soon, hopefully. She grabs onto the edge of the couch and pulls herself up and she’ll hold onto the cushions and walk back and forth. But she can’t walk on her own yet.


And you wouldn’t believe what happened this morning. I walked outside to get the newspaper and taped to our front door was a note saying: ‘You are cordially invited to the monthly bar-be-que at the Morrison household. Guests will arrive at six but the food won’t be served until seven, and there will be alcohol so leave the kiddies at home. Dress is casual, but please nothing inappropriate. The address is 2313. So come for some free drinks, great food, and nice conversation. P.S. bringing a treat to share is not required but always appreciated.’


And they didn’t just right this down on a piece of paper and then tape it to the door. They wrote it down on a really nice greeting card. We have to go, it would be rude not to. I wonder why they didn’t just ask us themselves. Or have Dwight tell us, I’m sure he’s been blabbing to everyone that he met us first. So after about an hour of going down on Faith I finally convinced her to go to this with me. We’re going to show up at six thirty, that way everyone else will already be there and we can meet them all at once. Faith doesn’t want to stay for a long time. She said that after we eat we’ll stay for an hour so it doesn’t seem like we’re just there for the food. Although that is mostly why she’s going.


We hired a babysitter so don’t freak out on me. A teenage girl lives to the left of us named Emma and she knocked on our door this afternoon because she heard about us getting invited and she offered to watch them. I let her meet the kids and they played together for a while in the backyard and I laid down the ground rules and told her what they can and cannot eat or drink passed a certain time and stuff like that. The kids really seemed to like her but I was with them the entire time Emma was over here so I have no idea how they’re going to react to being left alone with her. And she should be here any minute. We’re almost ready to go, once I get my dress zipped up we’ll be ready. It’s pink with little white flowers on it. Just a light weight summer dress that’s very casual. I’m just going to throw on some white flip flops. Faith is wearing her usual jeans and a t-shirt. Black jeans and a white shirt.


“Faith, will you zip this up for me, please?” She gets up from the vanity desk and walks over to me, dragging her feet and mumbling under her breath. She doesn’t want to go to this thing but I threatened to withhold sex if she didn’t go and at least act like she’s having a good time. And she has to be nice to everyone and no make any rude comments. If Faith doesn’t want to be somewhere she’ll let everyone know, that’s why I threatened the sex thing, at least this way she knows she has to behave.


“Please don’t act like this. We’ll be there for an hour and a half tops. Who knows, we might even have a good time. It’s not like we’ve met any of the other neighbors. This will be good for us. Maybe we’ll make some friends.” She rolls her eyes and sighs as she walks away. Then the doorbell rings. “You ready to go?” More grumbles and another sigh. Yeah, she’s ready.


“Hi.” Emma says when I open the door. She seems really perky. Kinda like a cheerleader on crack or something. “Wow, you two look great. You’re going to make a big splash at the bar-be-que. Everyone is talking about how they can’t wait to meet the Lehane sisters.” What the hell? They think me and Faith are sisters? We don’t even look alike. See, this is what happens when we don’t act all coupley. We need to start doing that more often. I give Emma a small smile and I can tell Faith is trying not to laugh. The neighbors must’ve looked our names up in the phone book or something. We’re listed under: Faith and Buffy Lehane. I’d figured we’re getting married within the next few years so we might as well be listed under the same last name. I guess that backfired a little. I hope she takes this well.


“Emma we’re not sisters, we’re lovers.” She looks a little shocked. Her eyes just grew about three times they’re normal size and she paled just a little. Ok, five dollars says she’s going to run down the street screaming at the top of her lungs and form an angry mob who will chase us into the street and stone us to death. “You don’t have a problem with that do you? ‘Cause we don’t have to go to the party, we can just stay home if you’re uncomfortable with it.” I’ll be more then a little upset if she says that she is uncomfortable with Faith and me, but she’s entitled to her own opinion and there’s nothing I can do about it. She calms down and clears her throat.


“No, it’s fine. Just wasn’t expecting that, is all. This neighborhood could use a little diversity.” And she smiles a big smile and I can’t tell if it’s fake or not but I smile back anyway. I move out of the way and she walks into the foyer. She waits at the door while me and Faith say goodbye to the kids. Matthew is fine being left alone with Emma, he isn’t afraid of strangers, but Addison is a little clingy. But Matthew distracts her for us and we walk back to the door. “Now I don’t have a curfew so stay there as long as you like. I remember all of the rules you told me this afternoon so you don’t have to worry about a thing. Have fun.” We say our goodbyes and leave the house.


“She seems nice,” I say, breaking the silence as we walk down the sidewalk. The Morrison’s house is only five houses down from ours. She nods her head and mumbles out a ‘yeah’. I try not to roll my eyes because of the way she’s acting. It’s like she’s going to the dentist or something, like this is just one big hassle. I put my hand on her arm and stop walking as I turn to face her. She stops too and faces me. “Faith, please just try to have fun. If you go there in this mood then they’ll all think we’re stuck up or something. Please, baby, do this for me?” She sighs and shifts her weight from one foot to the other.


“Fine, I’ll try to be act like I’m inna better mood. But if the food sucks I can’t promise it’ll last.” Fair enough. I hold onto her hand and we make our way to the Morrison’s house. There’s a sign saying to just walk around to the backyard so we do. The gate is open and we slowly walk around the side of the house. From my vantage point I see twenty people, at least. And equal mix of men and women. They’re dressed a lot like Faith and me. All the guys are wearing jeans and t-shirts, and the girls are either in nice khaki pants or nice dresses. Ok, so we’ll fit right in clothing wise, but will we be accepted? Emma seemed pretty open minded unless she was faking it. Are her parents open minded too, and are they even here? She didn’t tell me her parents’ names. Oh look, Dwight’s here and he spotted us. I guess the fun will begin now.


“Faith, Buffy, hi. Great to see you again.” We take turns shaking his hand and I have to fight the urge to wipe my hand off on my dress. I don’t know what it is but something about this guy gives me the wiggins. “I heard you got Emma Butler watching your two little ones tonight. Don’t worry she’s the best there is, they’re in safe hands.” Um, ok? How the hell did the news spread that fast? Is he spying on us or something? He motions for us to follow him and he leads us over to a small group of five women standing in a circle and laughing about something one of them said. “Ladies, I’d like to introduce you to the Lehanes.”


They all turn towards us and smile. And starting at the right of me there is a redhead about my height, blue eyes in a white blouse and tan pants. Then there’s a tall brunette, light eyes, tan skin, and she’s wearing a light blue sundress very similar to the one I’m wearing. Then there’s a tall, very leggy blonde. A total trophy wife with her white sundress and gold necklace and perfect tan and big chest size. I bet she had to go to a tanning salon to get that tan, and those boobs are probably fake too. And Faith is totally checking her out In a very low voice that only her slayer hearing can pick up I say: “Could you let it be more obvious that you want her? ‘Cause I don’t think the bartender saw you checking her out.” She gives me this ‘sorry, I couldn’t help it’ sort of look.


Anyway, next to her is another brunette, a little shorter then me in a blue top and black pants. She looks like someone, I can’t quite put my finger on it. Some actress on a T.V. show that was cancelled years ago. God, this is going to bug me all night. Anyway, so standing next to her is another redhead, but she’s older then the others and she kinda reminds me of that slutty woman from Edward Scissor Hands. I think Faith is thinking the same thing because she’s trying not to laugh. So they introduce themselves and starting from my right their names are: Rachel Connors, Mandy Wehunt, Kimberly Parks, Tricia Bishop, and Margie Whitman. And Faith is checking Kimberly out again. This is going to be a problem. Ok, it’s our turn to do the introducing.


“It’s nice to meet all of you. I’m Buffy and this is my fiancé, Faith.” They go from smiling happy faces to blank slates. Wow, that was a better reaction then I thought we were going to get. And this silence just couldn’t get anymore awkward. Is one of them going to say something? Ok, this is getting stupid, and they won’t stop staring at me and I’m feeling uncomfortable. “Um, excuse us we’re going to go get a drink. Anyone want anything?” They all shake their heads no and we walk away. “Well, that went better then expected,” I say when we’re out of earshot.


“At least they didn’t damn us to hell.” I know she’s trying to make me feel better by joking but she’s not. She gets points for intent though. I sit down on the barstool and she takes a seat next to me. This party is a little over the top if you ask me. With the tiki torches and colored lights and whicker furniture. And they hired a bartender, how dumb is that? Couldn’t they have just put out a bowl of punch like everyone else? I bet they’re not even going to grill the food themselves, they probably ordered it from a place that bar-be-ques and they’re having it delivered. I so wouldn’t put it passed them. Faith orders us some drinks but since I’m not paying attention I have no clue what she’s having the bartender make.


God I’d rather be home with my kids right now. I mean, I expected bad reactions but those people looked at us like they saw a ghost. And I’ve been in the same room with people who have seen ghosts for the first time, so I know what it looks like. A little part of me wishes that the initial shock of it will wear off and they’ll apologize for being rude and they’ll try to be friends with us. But at the same time I don’t think that’s gonna happen. And if it doesn’t then it doesn’t. I mean, I’d like to be friendly with the neighbors where we get invited to these parties and have a good time but I don’t think it’s gonna happen. On the bright side, if I’m right and they don’t like us just because we’re gay I get to tell Faith ‘I told you so’ and that’s always fun.


The bartender puts the two glasses in front of Faith and she hands one to me. What the hell is this? Oh well. I take a little sip, just in case it’s really strong. Mmm, vodka martini, a little strong but I’ll drink it. I don’t want to get drunk tonight, but maybe it would be better if I get a little buzzed. We stand up and start wondering around. Those weren’t the only people at the party. There was plenty of others and hopefully the introductions will go a lot smoother. But it seems those five women have already spread the news around and everyone is looking at us like we’re drug addicts or something. Ok Buffy, you’re just being paranoid.


Ok, this is going better then I thought. A few minutes ago they apologized, said that they just weren’t expecting that at all. And now we’re sitting around the large picnic table eating some really good food. There’s ribs and chicken all of it doused in sauce. And there’s potato salad, corn on the cob, a vegetable salad with raisins tossed in and macaroni salad but I passed on that. And Faith is being a saint. She’s being nice and polite and answering most of their questions with a smile.


Now that we all know each other a little better these people sure are asking a lot of questions about us and not just the guys. But they haven’t been too intrusive. The only ones we’re uncomfortable with are the questions about our kids. Well, at least the questions that have to do with the kids’ conception. I think when we get home we need to come up with a believable story to tell people when they ask about it.


What we can tell them is the kids’ birthdays and how old they are and what they’re like and stuff like that. Matthew’s birthday was in July, he’s seven now. We almost forgot about it because we were so busy flying our stuff out here. It was like two days before his birthday when Faith remembered and we called up a bunch of his friends from school and Dawn and Kyle and Xander and we had the party at Kid’s Kingdom.


It was a nice turn out and he was happy to see his friends again. But it was bittersweet because he was seeing them for the last time since we moved and everything. And most of those kids Matthew’s known since he was about a year old. And me and Faith have known the mothers for a long time and even though we weren’t great friends I’m still going to miss them. Faith isn’t. She never really liked them. Ok, I need to start paying attention since Janet Morrison is asking me another question.


FPOV


God this is so fuckin boring I would be gone by now but B’s havin a good time. Once those bitches got over the shock of B’s little announcement they’ve been actin like she’s the coolest thing since sliced bread. I know they just wanna to get to know her ‘cause we’re new but it’s fuckin annoying. And this Mandy chick has this laugh and every time someone says something that isn’t even funny she’ll laugh and it’s like someone puttin a screw in your head with an electric drill. If I weren’t for the eye candy sittin across from me and a couple seats to the right I’d be gone by now, with or without B. What can I say? I gotta thing for blondes. Don’t get me wrong I’d rather have B, but what’s the harm in lookin? It’s not like this Barbie is ever gonna want to fool around with me, even if she does catch me lookin and so far she hasn’t.


The guys here are ok. They’re not the kinda people I’d pick to hang out with but they’re nice and they haven’t asked too many personal questions. Probably ‘cause their wives are close by. Dwight is still annoying as hell. Buffy’s right about him bein creepy. I don’t get an evil vibe, just a creepy one. But still, it could be worth checkin out. I need to get out of here and go slayin. This is just too boring. I’m gonna go slayin by myself, figured B owes me that much since she made me come to this damn thing. I’d rather have her with me but Emma has to go home sometime tonight. I don’t think her parents would like it if she stayed over at our place until two in the morning. And this dumb thing is gonna end way before that so what would be tell her? ‘Oh sorry we’re so late Em, but there was this big nasty demon that didn’t wanna go down easy’.


I’m kinda glad we came here, ‘cause this food is fuckin good. If we weren’t in front of about twenty people we just met I’d eat it all. I gotta ask Jake what he used for the sauce ‘cause it’s fuckin unbelievable. He even put extra on mine when I flashed him a dimple filled smile. I don’t know what it is about the dimples but people love ‘em and it’s not my fault that they love ‘em so much they feel like they gotta give me free stuff. Ok, so there was some boob work but not much. I heard one a the guys, I think his name is Mike, ask Jake what’s in it but he said it’s a secret. But I’m sure if I show off a little cleavage and flash one of the smiles he’ll give the secret up in a heartbeat.


“Well he sounds like a doll.” B’s been braggin ‘bout the kids for fifteen minutes now. “You should bring him by my place tomorrow. I’m sure he and Lucas will get along great.” Rachel, the hot redhead, has a little boy, ‘bout a month older then Mattie. I haven’t been payin too close attention to any of the conversation but I wanna know the kinda people who are gonna be hangin around my kid and Rachel seems ok. And I’m not just sayin that ‘cause she has great legs. “And once school starts I’m sure he’ll make lots of friends. All of the kids get along just fine.” Yep, everything about this town is perfect, if you ignore all the demons and high death rate.


“And my Lindsay is only three months younger then Matthew. Maybe we can all get together, have a sort of ‘welcome to the neighborhood’ party for him so he can meet all the other kids his age that live on the block’.” The Barbie, I think her name is Kim, says. God look at those lips. If I were still single I’d seduce that Barbie and have her suckin on me in no time. And I’d tie her hair back so I could see the whole thing. And when she’s done I’d lick my come off those juicy lips. Ow What the fuck? I look over at B and she’s glarin at me a little. There’s no fuckin way she know what I was thinkin. No fuckin way. Then why the fuck did she kick my shin?


“What B?” I try not to sound too pissed but it’s kinda hard. She glares at me for a second before she gets this sweet smile on her face. Great, she wants somethin. She’s gonna ask me to do somethin or go somewhere to get her somethin. I’ve known her long enough to know when she gets that smile on her face I’ll have to do somethin or else she’ll bitch and whine until I do. So I might as well say yes and get it over with ‘cause I don’t want our first fight in this new house to be about how lazy I am ‘cause I won’t drive down the store and buy her a new tea cozy or some shit like that.


“Faith, I asked if you could finish unpacking on Sunday so I can take Matthew and Addison over to Kimberly’s house for a play date.” Oh, um, so I guess it was pretty fuckin obvious that I was zonin out ‘cause everyone is lookin at me like I’m on crack. Hopefully we’ll get most of everything unpacked tomorrow, that way I won’t spend my entire Sunday workin. It’d be nice to just sit around and be lazy while B and the kids are gone. Callin the cable company would be a good thing.


“Yeah, I can do that. If I’m not too tired when I’m done.” We both know I’m not gonna be tired. I’m a slayer for God sakes, but these people don’t know that. “I’ll run by the hardware store and get some paint samples.” We’re gonna repaint the bedrooms before we get too settled. ‘Cause if we put it off too long we won’t do it. And now the women are all talkin about their houses and what they look like and all that other shit. Well, at least B’s havin a good time. It makes listenin to this shit worthwhile, ‘cause she’ll go home inna good mood and maybe I’ll get some tonight. Told ya I’m a nympho. And this whole gettin older and havin kids thing hasn’t slowed us down. Well, not as much as ‘normal’ couples. I down the last sip of my beer and Jake is watchin me. He’s been doin that all fuckin night. Watchin me eat and drink. He’s not checkin out my body ‘cause earlier when I stretched and gave my hair a little shake only David and Logan were lookin at me. B sees that my bottle is empty and she puts her hand on top of mine and smiles this sweet little smile. Oh boy, here we go.


“Baby, that was your fourth one, how about one more and then call it quits on the alcohol?” I try as hard as I fuckin can not to roll my eyes. But I take her shit with a grin ‘cause we’re in front of the neighbors but I’m so gonna give her hell about this later. She just talked to me like I’m a fuckin kid or somethin. The tone of her voice....is this was Lily was talkin about? ‘Cause I think it is. Jake offers to get me another and who am I to say no to that kinda service?


“Wow, Buffy you have her on a pretty short leash,” the Barbie says. Oh ha, ha, ha. Let’s all laugh ‘cause Faith’s fuckin whipped. Ha-de-fuckin-ha. Fuckin bitch. I take back what I said earlier. I wouldn’t fuck this bitch if I could....well....yeah I would. But I’d make sure to make it a little painful ‘cause I bet this goody two shoes likes it rough.


The nice and quiet girls who look so innocent and fuckin pure are almost always into the kinky shit. Leather whips and shit. And most of the time they thought they were gonna be in charge. And trust me when I say that arguin over who is gonna be on all fours and spanked with a paddle is a fuckin mood killer. That’s why after tryin to score with a couple Suzie Homemakers I stuck with horny boys ‘cause they never argue. They just wanna get off, doesn’t matter to them who’s on top.


“Well you know how it is, give ‘em too much slack and they’ll just wander off.” Ha, ha looks like everybody’s a fuckin comedian tonight. The only thing keepin me here is the beer. It’s really good. I wonder what kind it is. Doesn’t matter. It’s nice, cold and a little foamy. It’s better then the other stuff I’ve had before. Nope, this is different. B said no more after the one Jake is gonna give me but I think I’ll have a few more. I mean, it’s just beer. Really good beer, but what’s the worst that’ll happen? I’ll go home a little tipsy and have a little hangover tomorrow. No big deal.


Jake brings me back my drink. Hmm, he already took the cap off. Oh well, no need askin for another. Don’t want him thinkin I’m suspicious or nothin, ‘cause I’m not. Just ‘cause he’s been watchin me like a fuckin hawk doesn’t mean I have reason to be suspicious. Nope, not at all. I take a long, slow sip of it. If this is my last one I’m gonna savor it. Make it last ‘till the chill starts to wear off.


Since it’s almost completely dark now everyone gets up from the table and we go over to the porch and sit on the chairs they have set up here. I sit next to me and she holds onto my hand for a little bit, but she’s too busy talkin with the other wives. It’s nice seein her havin a good time doin somethin so normal. It’s what she’s always wanted ya know. Just a nice, normal life. But she can’t get that completely. She has to slay, it’s in her blood. And I know she doesn’t wanna admit it but she gets off on it. I know better then anyone how she is after a good night’s slay. She can fool her friends, she can fool herself but she can’t fool me.


I gotta admit this is kinda nice. Sittin around, drinkin a beer, watchin everyone interact. It’s kinda weird but I like to ‘people watch’ as B calls it. I just like watchin facial expressions and stuff like that when people talk to each other. You can tell more about a person by their facial expressions then you can by their words. All you gotta do is pay attention and most people don’t.


Like just now, Tricia said that she likes her bathroom better now that it’s a seashell theme then a butterfly one, and Margie agreed with a smile but you can tell that she’s lyin ‘cause her smile is tight, forced. She hates the seashells, she’s just too ‘polite’ to say so. That’s the problem with people, they never wanna say what they’re really thinkin. Anya had the right idea, but everyone called her rude and conceded. Well, they got the second part a little right, but she wasn’t too rude. Hey, if you can’t handle the truth plug your fuckin ears.


All the guys stand up and Jake says that they’re all goin to the game room. I give B a little sideways glance and she smiles and says I can go with ‘em if I want. So I get up and leave with the guys. A couple of ‘em smile but the rest look a little pissed. I guess they wanted to get away from all things female but fuck them. I’ll just act like myself and prove that I’m not like the rest of those chicks out there, includin B. All those chicks are proper and uptight, I can’t really act like myself in front of them if I want to be friends with them. Well, if B wants to be friends with them. See if I act like I normally do then they won’t invite B to any more of these parties ‘cause I’d come to ‘cause these parties are for the couples of this block.


I don’t pay attention to anything around me as I follow the guys into the basement, which has been turned into a game room. And this game room is fuckin sweet. Big screen T.V. against the wall, with a huge leather couch that could fit seven people at least. There’s a pool table in the middle of the room, against the wall to my left are the cues, eight of ‘em. In the back of the room is an air hokey table and a foosball table, ‘cause you gotta have a fuckin foosball table.


I bought a miniature one for Mattie’s birthday a couple weeks ago. We totally forgot about it until I remember two days before. It’s insane to think that nine years ago I was in fuckin prison facing a life sentence. If it hadn’t been for the Angel team’s big fuck up I never woulda got out, and I never woulda gone back to Sunnydale, and I never woulda got together with B and neither of my babies would exist. I’ll have to send the gang a thank you, a fruit basket or somethin. I’ll get a necklace for Cordy, an old book about demons or somethin for Wes, a weapon for Gunn, Angel and Fred are gonna be the hardest to shop for.


“So Faith, how long have you and Buffy been together?” one of ‘em, I think his name is Danny, asks me. They don’t wanna know about that shit. But he gets points for intent, at least he’s tryin to be nice. I sit down on a chair in the corner of the room so I can see ‘em all. I look over at this guy as he takes a swig of his beer. He’s nice lookin, ‘bout six foot, short blonde hair, killer blue eyes, an ok body. If I were single I’d take him for a ride. But I could say that ‘bout half these guys.


“Nine years.” They all nod their heads and things are startin to get a little awkward. I take another swig from my drink. Fuck, it’s almost empty. Well, we’re downstairs now and Jake has a mini fridge, which is sweet, I gotta get me one of those. Anyway, it’s stocked up on beer and what B doesn’t know won’t hurt her. As long as I don’t get too tipsy I’ll be fine and she’ll never be the wiser. I get up and grab a pool cue and turn around to face the boys. “Anyone up for a round?” I raise an eyebrow and three of ‘em except my challenge. We’re playin teams and the ok lookin guy whose name I think is Danny is on my team.


The others sit on the couch and turn on the T.V. I watch as Danny breaks and I take another swig of my beer as Mike takes a shot. Ok, so my team is solids, good to know. On the T.V. is a baseball game but I don’t really pay attention ‘till I hear the announcer start talkin. It’s the Boston Red Sox against the Detroit Tigers, and Boston’s up by three. Boston hasn’t won the World Series since 2004, and every year I say they’re gonna win, but B couldn’t care any less. So I start talkin to the guys about it and they seemed a little surprised. Guess they didn’t take me for a sports fan. And now they’re finally startin to relax around me. Maybe we’ll get along great after all.


“No way, there’s no fuckin way the Yanks are gonna win this year,” I tell Steve after I take my shot. Damn, I missed. Oh well. Me and Danny are winnin by two so I guess it doesn’t matter. We’ve been down here for about an hour, this is our second game, we’re goin for two outta three, and I won the last game. These guys are pretty good but I’ve been holdin back a little. Don’t wanna make ‘em feel intimidated or nothin. I want them to be relaxed around me, like they are now.


“Boston hasn’t won in nine fuckin years, what makes you think they’re gonna win this year?” Oh yeah, they’re nice and relaxed alright. I watch as Mike tries to find the best shot. “Besides, them winnin last time was pure luck.” Whatever, Boston won because they kick ass. I’d say somethin but I’m finishing off the last of the bottle. Mmm, good to the last drop. This is a weird feelin buzz. Nothin’s ever made me feel this way before. Maybe it’s just the brand....nope, I’ve had this stuff before and it didn’t do this to me. But it feels good. I wanna another beer. “Faith, you ok? It’s your shot.” Oh, right. Alright, lets see what I’ve got. Hmmm, very crappy. Looks like I’ll have to go for the number six in the corner pocket. Alright, this has to be done very carefully or else I’ll miss and then we’ll lose.


“Fuck. Damn, that sucked.” I can’t believe I missed that. Stupid cue, I think it’s broken. Fuck this, I don’t wanna play anymore. Another beer sounds nice though. I know, I had more then I said I would but B doesn’t have to know about it. Besides, if she were me she’d do the same thing. She’s a little sneak, always tryin to get away with stuff..............What was I talkin ‘bout? Oh right, I was lookin for another beer.


“You out Faith?” Jake asks. I nod my head yeah and throw the bottle in the trash. He gets up and walks behind the bar. Wow, where’d that come from? Who cares? He’s gettin me a beer. Did I tell ya about Jake? He’s a good guy, nice, funny, not very good lookin but that’s ok, ‘cause I’m with B so no one stands a chance at gettin me, ‘cause I’m taken. Hmm, that sounds weird. Taken. I’m taken. Buffy took me and now no one can have me. Is that a good? I mean.....what was I talkin about? “Here, Faith.” Oh, right, the beer. Hmm, the cap’s already off. Oh well. I nod a little thanks and chug it down. Mmmm, nice and cold. Uh-oh, it’s all gone. Damn.


“Faith, are you ready to go?” What? Who is that? Oh, B, right. I toss the bottle in the trash before she walks in the room, ‘cause she’s still walkin down the stairs. Now, as long as I act fine she’ll never know I had ten bottles. Yep, everything’ll be ok. Damn, she’s lookin hot tonight. I’m gonna have some of that ass, that’s for damn sure. “Faith? Come on, let’s go.” Jeez, she’s a nag. She needs to be loosened up a little. I’ll take care of that as soon as we get home.


“Bye guys, see ya later.” They all say bye and don’t sound too broken up ‘cause I’m leavin. Oh well, I’m goin home with my girl and we’re gonna fuck so all is right with the world. Jeez she’s smells really good. Does she always wear that perfume? And her hands are so soft, was she always this soft? Mmmm, Buffy. Why are we stoppin on the porch? I guess she wants to say bye to her new friends. That’s fine, I can wait. I shake my head a little bit. Why is everything gettin a little blurry? There, eyes better now. This stupid, Faith bored.


BPOV


Faith’s been acting a little strange. I know she had more beer then we agreed on, but I’ve never seen her like this. Even after that one night we got really drunk on tequila she wasn’t like this. At least I don’t think she was. I was pretty wasted too so she could’ve been like this. But I’ve never seen her act like this because of beer. And the weird thing is I have a little red flag in the back of my mind waving around, telling me that this is really serious and very bad but I don’t know why. And it all seems kinda familiar somehow. I don’t know, she better now wake the kids up when we get home that’s for damn sure.


“Thanks again, Janet, for inviting us. It was fun, we’ll definitely come to the next one, if you want us to. And Kim, I guess I’ll see you on Sunday if not sooner.” I finish saying my goodbyes and Faith doesn’t say a word the entire time. She does this little wave but I think she was swatting at a bug. When did her hair get so dirty? She showered this afternoon and it didn’t’ get very hot out so there’s no reason why it should be that dirty.


I take Faith by the hand and we leave. Hopefully she won’t stumble allover the place. It’s only a three minute walk back to the house, if that, but still that’s plenty of time for her to fall and accidentally bring me down with her. What is she doing? Is she...is she smelling my neck?


“Mmm, girl smell good.” Oh God, no. Ew! She just licked my neck. “Girl taste sweet.” I stop walking and grab onto Faith’s arm and turn her so she’s facing me. Why didn’t I think of this before? The dirty, dread locky hair, the hard look in her eyes, that funky smell...Faith drank cured beer and now she’s a cave slayer. This is just too funny! Oh my God, this is priceless. Everyone makes fun of me still because of that night and now...now it’s happened to Faith.


I start laughing so hard I can’t breathe. She’s going to be acting so damn weird. And if she acts anything like I did then I should get out the camcorder because I really want her to see it. Maybe then she’ll stop teasing me during sex when I start talking monosyllabically. Every time I do it’s always ‘Oh B, looks like the cave slayer is takin over.’ Or, when we used to drink, it was ‘Don’t have too many, B, wouldn’t wanna unleash the cave slayer.’ I get so sick of it, and now it’s happened to her! I’m laughing so hard that I lose my balance and fall forward. Luckily Faith catches me. Aw, she’s all concerned. “Girl ok?” I look into her eyes and she gently tucks a stray lock of hair behind my ear.


“I’m ok. See? Perfectly ok.” I take a step back and twirl around once so she can see I’m fine. “Thank you for catching me.” You want to know what she just did? I bet you’re dying to know. She blushed. That’s right, little miss bad ass over here just blushed because I thanked her. Hold on a sec, we can’t go home. I don’t think it would be a good idea to have her in my clean house. She might draw on the walls or something. And I don’t want Matthew seeing her like this. I know she won’t hurt him or anything like that but I don’t know how he’ll react to her.


“Girl pretty.” Ok, now it’s my turn to blush a little. I think she noticed that my cheeks are getting red because now she’s smiling that cocky little grin. Even cave woman Faith has that smile, I just can’t get away from it, can I? She gently caresses my cheek. “And soft.” I never thought Faith as a cave slayer (and oh yes there have been fantasies) would be so sweet. I always pictured her carrying me over her shoulder and tossing me down on the bed and ripping off our clothes and having her way with me. But I like this one too. So where are we going to go since we can’t go home? Oh, I know the perfect place.


“Faith, you wanna go to the park?” Her eyebrows furrow a little bit and the confused look on her face is kinda cute. Faith doesn’t like to show that she’s confused because she thinks it makes her look stupid, at least, I think that’s what she thinks. So to see her looking confused is cute. “You know, the park.” Still the confusion. “With the slides and the swings and the sand boxes?” And she looks even more confused. I guess I’ll just have to show her. I hold onto her hand and walk down the street. She looks at my hand and smiles a little and she rubs the top of it with her fingertips of her freehand.


“Soft.” She trails her fingertips up my arm and then down to my wrist. I get goosebumps and she smiles a little. “Girl lumpy.” She lets out a little giggle. I really wish I had a camcorder right now. Oh she’ll remember all of it, at least I think she will. I remember every detail of the night I went back a million years B.C. or however long ago there were cave people. But I know Faith well enough to guarantee that if she remember it all she’ll deny it and if I start to explain what she was acting like she’ll play dumb and say that I’m lying. “What’s that?” She lets go of my hand and runs into someone’s front yard since there’s no fence and stops in front of something that’s under a window. I walk up next to her and she’s studying the rose bush like it’s the most interesting thing in the world.


“That’s a rose bush,” I whisper. I hope the people who live here don’t wake up and catch us out here. She reaches out and touches one of the flowers. She’s being so gentle, it’s a little weird to see because she’s usually only this tender with the kids. “But don’t touch the stem. The thorns are-” Too late. “Sharp.” She yelps out in pain and puts the tip of her middle finger in her mouth and sucks on it a little. I try not to roll my eyes. What a baby, she gets hurt worst then that when we train together. Then again she’s not really thinking like a slayer right now so I should cut her some slack.


“Let me see.” She shakes her head no. Ok, since she’s acting like a child right now maybe this will work. “I’ll kiss it and make it better.” She thinks about it for a few seconds and then holds out her hand. A tiny drop of blood appears. That’s it? That’s what she’s pouting about? Oh well. I kiss the tip of her finger and then she pulls her hand away and looks at it. Her eyebrows scrunch up and she looks a little mad.


“Liar.” What did she just call me? “Not better.” She holds up her hand so I can see the other little drop of blood that just came out. “Girl said ‘kiss and make better’. It not better. Girl liar.” Well technically she is right. But that’s beside the point. I guess I shouldn’t say stuff to her like that then since she’s going to take everything I say literally. And what’s with this her calling me ‘girl’ thing? We’ve been together for nine years you’d think she’d remember my name.


“I’m sorry. I won’t lie again.” She doesn’t seem too convinced. Ok, moving on. “And my name is Buffy.” I think I better make sure she understands this. I put my hand on her upper chest. “Faith.” I pull my hand away and put it on mine. “Buffy.” I do this three times until she puts her hand on my upper chest and takes half a step forward.


“Buffy.” At least she got it right. “Buffy soft. Buffy smell good.” She leans in real close and barely licks my bottom lip with the tip of her tongue. “Buffy taste sweet,” she whispers. Oh God. How can one little gesture turn me on so much so quickly? But I can’t have sex with Faith. Not while she’s like this. She isn’t thinking straight and it would be like taking advantage of a little kid. It would be wrong on so many different levels. And besides we can’t go home yet so we have no place to have sex, if we were going to, which we’re not. I take a step back and gulp. This wouldn’t be so hard if I weren’t so turned on.


“Faith no. That was bad.” She looks confused and a little hurt. “We can’t kiss. No kissing. Kissing is bad. Very, very bad.” I don’t sound mean, or mad, just desperate. Ok, we need to get out of here. “Come on, let’s go.” I hold onto her hand and lead her to the sidewalk. We walk in silence for a few minutes. I hope I didn’t hurt her feelings. If I try to explain it she won’t understand. If I hurt her feelings I’m sorry but we can’t have sex and kissing will definitely lead to sex tonight. Just that one little lick got me all hot, imagine what an actual kiss would do. No Buffy, no imagining. Stop it right now.


“Why kissing bad?” Oh great. Why is she so curious? If she were a cat she’d be dead by now. “Buffy, why kissing bad?” Ignoring her isn’t working so I’ll have to come up with some type of explanation. I think I’ve been quiet for too long, she’s getting a little upset. “Buffy mad at Faith? Faith bad?” I stop walking and turn and turn her at the same time so we’re facing each other.


“No, Faith you’re not bad.” She still looks confused. Maybe I should put it in simpler terms? Maybe that’ll help. “Faith not bad.” She nods her head but she still looks a little confused. She’s probably confused about the kissing thing. How am I going to explain this? “Kissing is bad because...” What the hell am I supposed to say? I wish I were a better liar. “Just because ok? Kissing is bad, so no kissing.” She doesn’t look confused anymore, she looks a little mad.


“Buffy liar. Kissing good.” And now she’s walking off. Great. Well, at least she’s headed in the right direction. If she keeps walking straight she’ll be at the park in ten minutes. I’ll trail behind her to make sure she doesn’t make any turns. And just freaking great, she turned left. I’ve never been down that road before so I have no idea where she’ll end up. I catch up with her but she’s still mad. “No. Go away. Buffy bad. Buffy liar.” Jeez, so I told her kissing is bad, it’s not like I kicked her puppy. She’s completely overreacting. She can be such a drama queen sometimes.


“Faith, I’m not a liar.” She growls a little and keeps on walking. There’s only one thing I can think of that’ll get her to cooperate. “Faith if you go to the park with me I’ll give you a kiss.” She stops instantly. I knew that would work. “Come on, the park’s this way.” I grab onto her hand but she pulls it away. What the hell? She looks mad again. What did I do now?


“Buffy said kissing baaad.” Oh my God. Even when she’s a prehistoric neanderthal she’s still a smart ass. I better answer her because she’s getting pretty mad.


“Well...” Ok, I have to admit it. It’s the only way to make her happy. “Buffy liar.” Now she has this superior, cocky look on her face. Ya know, she’s not so different from normal Faith. And if she’s anything like normal Faith I know how to wipe that look off her face. I lean in and kiss her. It’s soft and gentle and even though I want to do this for hours I can’t. I pull back before she has the chance to try and deepen it. She has this lustful look in her eyes. “Want more?” She nods her head yes. Ha, I left her speechless. That’s rare. “Then follow me.” I turn around and walk off. And she’s following me. That’s how manipulation is done boys and girls. Granted it won’t be hard manipulating her since she has the i.q. of a child but still.


“Buffy soft.” I guess she likes the fact that I’m soft. She starts running her fingers through my hair and down my arm. “Buffy taste sweet.” She puts her hand on my shoulder. “Kiss Buffy more.” Great, here we go. She turns me so I’m facing her and she kisses me. Her lips are so soft and she’s kissing me so slowly and gently. I thought she was going to rush or be a little forceful but she’s not. I pull back when I need to breathe. After a minute she leans in again but I put my finger on her lips to stop her.


“No more until we get to the park.” And now she’s pouting. “When we get to the park I’ll give you one more kiss, ok?” She won’t have to wait long since we’re about a block away. I can see it from where we’re standing. “Come on, cry baby, let’s go.” I loop my arm through hers and we start walking again. She’s being really quiet. I wonder what she’s thinking about. I know she’s probably not having any deep profound thoughts at the moment but I still want to know.


As soon as we step through the archway and onto the jogging path I stop walking and Faith turns to face me. I put my hands on her hips and lean forward. She closes the little gap between us and this kiss is just as soft as the last one. I love kissing Faith. It’ll always be one of my favorite things to do. But I have to pull back before things get out of control. Before I get out of control. I can’t be a tease, I can’t lead her on. She’s not thinking like herself, obvious and she could get violent. It’s not her fault, I got violent when I didn’t get what I wanted. But I don’t want it to lead to that. So for now we’ll stop, but I have to use the kissing as a reward system because I don’t want her getting out of control or wandering off or something.


“Want more?” She nods her head yes and leans in for another but I stop her. “You have to be good. If you’re good you’ll get more.” She nods her head and looks around. There’s a reason I wanted to come to the park. In the very short time we spent patrolling we found that the baddies don’t come to the park a whole lot. So hopefully we’ll run into only one vampire, possibly a demon. But all of the demons we saw here are the nicer ones that aren’t a real threat to anyone. And since we’re the only ones here she won’t have to share the playground equipment because I know she’ll want to try it all.


So, like I said about an hour ago, she wanted to try out everything. The merry-go-round was a big hit. But she’s tried ‘em all; the swings she fell off of, the slide she was afraid of, she tried to eat the sand in the sand box and found out the hard way that it’s gross. She got really dizzy on the merry-go-round and almost got sick, she broke the bouncy horse, pig and duck and I wouldn’t let her go near the cow. She hated the seesaw and won’t come down from the top of the jungle gym. I tried calling her down but that didn’t work, but ignoring her is doing the trick since she’s trying to impress me.


“Buffy watch Faith!” she yells out. I look at her through the corner of my eye and I see her standing at the very top of the jungle gym and she’s inching her way towards the edge. I hope she doesn’t fall. It’s a ten foot drop and she could get hurt. “Buffy watch!” She sounds like she’s getting a little mad. So I look up at her and she smiles. She’s at the very edge of the little platform and it’s making me nervous. What is she up to? I know she’s been trying to impress me because when she was on the merry-go-round she’d get it going really fast and then yell out for me to watch. And we’ve also just been walking around a little, and she picked me flowers. Wait, what is she doing? Oh my God, she’s gonna....


“Faith no!” Too late. She jumps straight out so she’s at least ten feet away from the jungle gym and she does a back flip and lands on her feet. God she could’ve gotten hurt! What the hell was she thinking? Coming here was a very bad idea. We should just go home. The kids probably fell asleep hours ago, why was I even afraid of taking her home? I’ll just get her into the bedroom really fast just in case Matthew wakes up or something and I’ll tie her to the bed if I have to until this shit wears off. She walks up to me, smiling, and then she sees the look on my face and the smile goes away.


“Buffy not like? Faith good. Faith do flip, make Buffy smile. Buffy no smile?” She sounds so worried. And how can I stay mad at that face? God! Sometimes I wish she didn’t have this type of control over me. I sigh and look passed her for a few seconds. I think that just freaks her out a little more, but I’ll let you be the judge on that one. “Faith make Buffy happy? Buffy mad at Faith? What Faith do that bad?” Yeah, I’d say she’s freaking out because of that desperate tone to her voice.


“Buffy not mad.” Great, and the bad grammar is contagious. “I mean, I’m not mad. I was scared. You could have hurt yourself.” She gets this look on her face like a light bulb just went off above her head. She smiles and then holds onto my wrists and puts my hands on her upper chest.


“Faith not hurt. See?” She starts to move my hands downwards, passed her breasts and onto her stomach. God, does she have any idea what she’s doing to me? She steps closer to me and wraps my arms around her lower back. “Faith good. Faith get kiss.” She leans in and kisses me. I should pull back right now. I should end this right now but I can’t. Her lips are just so damn soft. “Nice. Faith like. Faith want more.” She kisses me a little rougher, but it still feels good. Her hands start to rub the back of my neck as she holds me right where she wants me. Ok I need to breathe. I pull back and I start to pant, she’s panting too but not as hard as me.


“Ok, Faith, no more. We need to go home.” Her eyebrows scrunch up a little and she gets that really cute confused look on her face again. Ok, this is going to be a total low blow but I’m desperate here. “We need to check on the kids.” Her eyes get a little big and she quickly nods her head yes. Hmm, well that was a much better reaction then I had imagined. I thought she wouldn’t even know what I was talking about and fight me the whole way home. But now we’re headed home, holding hands and her muscles are tense. She wants to run but she’s holding back for whatever reasons. It’ll only take us ten minutes to get home, so can be patient. See, that wasn’t so bad.


“Faith be very quiet.” She nods her head as I unlock the door. I open it and let her walk in first. I step inside and close the door. I lead her into the living room and I see Emma, sitting on the couch watching something on the T.V. It has to be a DVD because we don’t have the cable hooked up yet. Yep, she’s watching ‘Taking Lives’ I remember this scene. “We’re home.” She shuts off the T.V. and stands up and stretches her arms above her head. “So, how did everything go?” She looks down at her watch and yawns a little. Oh come on, we weren’t gone that long.


“Great. Addison was a little fussy so I gave her a bath and used the lavender shampoo. That’s ok, right? I mean, you never said anything about baths or anything.” I smile at her and she physically calms down. I explain that giving her the bath was fine and I’m glad she did or Addison might still be up. “That must’ve been some party, they usually don’t last this long.” I give her a weird look and glance over at the clock on the wall. Shit, we’ve been gone for six hours! Damn....well, she said everything went great and she was watching a movie so I guess she didn’t get too bored.


“Yeah, um....” Ok, I need an excuse. And I know the perfect one. “Well, we left a little before it ended, actually. Faith had a little too much to drink so I had her walk some of it off before we came home. I hope you don’t mind.” She smiles and glances over at Faith. I look over at my finance too. She’s standing next to the end table by the touch, holding a picture frame and studying it closely.


“Not at all. The longer you’re out the more cash for me, right?” She gives a little nervous laugh and I smile at her. I tell her to wait and I go into the kitchen. On top of the fridge is a coffee can, we keep some extra cash in it for things like this. I pay her and we say our goodbyes and she leaves. I walk over to Faith and look over her shoulder. She’s looking at a picture that was taken in November when Addison was first brought home from the hospital. Dawn took it so all four of us are in it. Faith reaches out and gently touches the glass with her fingertips and runs them along the faces in the picture.


“Mine,” she says softly, pointing at me. Well, what can I say? I am hers. She points to the kids and she’s quiet for a few seconds. “Mine, and Buffy’s.” When she’s right, she’s right. She puts the picture frame down before I can say anything and she walks off towards the hall. Oh great, I hope she doesn’t wake them up. Before I can catch up to her she’s in Addison’s room and she’s standing over the crib, watching her sleep. I stand in the doorway and watch Faith. I smile as she reaches into the crib and gently caresses the cubby little cheek. Oh no, she’s picking Addison up. No! She’s gonna wake her up.....or not.


“Faith, what are you doing?” I walk up to her and she’s cradling Addison in her arms and our girl is still passed out, sucking away on her pacifier. She’s a little angel...at least when she’s sleeping. When she’s awake that’s a whole other story. She leaves the room and I follow her. She’s walking so slowly, so carefully. So goes into our bedroom and puts Addison down in the middle of the bed. What is she doing? She walks up to me and grabs onto my wrist and gently makes me sit down on the bed.


“Buffy stay.” Um....ok? She leaves the room. What the hell? I look over at my baby girl. I love her so much, it’s almost mind blowing. I try not to think about how much I love my kids because I think that I love them so much that if I were to actually sit down and analyze it I’d scare myself too much. It sounds crazy I know. Faith walks into the bedroom carrying Matthew. I guess the cave slayer wants her family in the same room? It makes sense if you think about it. Cave people lived in what? Caves, that’s right. One roomed caves, so the whole family was right there, maybe in different areas but they were all in seeing distance. I guess Faith wants us all together so she’ll know we’re safe? She lays Matthew down and looks at me.


“Buffy get in bed.” I nod my head yes and change into my pajamas first. I help Faith out of her dirty clothes and into some of her pajamas, which is a t-shirt and some boxers. We lay down in the bed, under the covers, with the kids in between us. She’s snuggling up to Addison and Matthew has my neck in a death lock. I gotta admit falling asleep like this is kinda nice. We’re all together and happy and very tired. This has been a long night. I just hope Faith is better by morning because I don’t think I’ll be able to resist my cave slayer if she gets a little frisky.