ONE NORMAL LIFE / TWO EXTRAORDINARY LIVES

CHAPTER 2 - WHERE DO WE GO FROM HERE?

Over the next week, each member of the Scooby Gang came up and told her they were sorry for her loss, in so many words. Xander, Faith, even Wood.

Even Andrew, who said, “I always liked Spike, even though he bit me that time!”

Buffy laughed, knowing what Spike would have thought of this proclamation.

Of all of them, only Willow knew what was closest to the truth. She had been in the principal's office when the amulet exploded upward from Spike, breaking the floor and right up through the ceiling above her.

They were alone in the motor home one afternoon, when Willow knocked on Buffy's bedroom door.

"Come in."

"Buffy. How ya doin'?" Willow asked, looking sadly at her friend lying on the bed.

"Better. I guess. Just laying her thinking," she'd answered.

"About what?" Willow asked gently.

"Spike."

Willow smiled, "Thought so," she walked over and sat on the edge of the bed.

"I wanted to tell you something Buffy," Willow started out, with a worried expression on her face.

"What is it?" Buffy asked, alarmed, raising herself on one arm.

"It's nothing bad, Buffy. Sorry if I startled you. It's something good, I just didn't want to tell you, until...you'd had some time for yourself."

She continued, "I know Buffy," she said.

"Know what?"

"I know how Spike died. I saw it while I was working the spell, while I was ascending to temporary goddess-hood, saw how he would die. And then I felt it, when his light, his energy broke through the floor, right next to me.
I saw his goddess, Buffy, saw his humanity, his love, his wholeness, his soul," Willow said, as she took Buffy's hand.

She looked at Willow, her eyes growing large, as the latest dam broke, sending rivers of tears streaming down her face. Buffy grabbed Willow'sd tid tightly; her throat constricted, "Thank you," she said, "thank you."

Willow hugged Buffy to her, "I just wanted you to know that someone else knew what he was, what he did, how he…you know what I mean," she said, words failing her.

"I know," Buffy said, "and thank you for sticking up for me, for Spike and me, when we went away for the weekend. To Giles, to Xander."

"You guys loved each other, what's the big?" Willow smiled, shrugging her shoulders, as if they had been the most normal couple in the world.

Buffy looked at her, then cracked up.

They both laughed then, until they cried.

But it had felt good; cathartic, to have at least one person, (well, two, if you count Dawn's tenuous grip on the matter) know how much he meant to her, that she’d loved him, to see him as her beloved and as a hero. To not have to deny or hide her feelings anymore.

After that afternoon, they talked oftabouabout Spike, Tara, Anya, their moms, and all the people they'd loved and lost. They talked about what they now wanted to do with their lives.

Willow had decided that she would accompany Giles back to England and help him set up a school for all the new slayers, where they could not only finish their high-school education, but learn the finer points of becoming a slayer. In the future, perhaps even think of starting a school stateside.

Willow hoped she'd be able to complete her own education at the nearby university.

She would also be living in close proximity to the coven, so she could hone her magic skills, as well.

Vi and the other three remaining slayers would accompany them, as would Kennedy.

Xander decided to go to New Jersey to work for a distant first cousin, who offered him an office job in construction, assuring them that he would be willing to help them anytime the need arose.

Andrew decided to enroll in college to study journalism and filmmaking, believing that his redemption if not in telling Buffy's story (which she adamantly refused!) would be in telling the stories of others that had no voice.

Faith and Robin decided they would travel to Cleveland to see if they could help control the latest Hellmouth and to train girls in that area. Maybe, open up that stateside school someday. Robin also insisted that Faith study for her G.E.D., with his help, and maybe, just maybe, go on to college herself someday.

Over the next week they bought cameras. Lots and lots of Polaroid Instant Cameras and film, as well as disposable ones. They had no pictures of each other anymore, all had been lost. No pictures of Anya, none of her mom, no baby pictures, no favorite picture of the three of them - her, Willow, and Xander. And no picture of Spike.

Buffy grieved, remembering the wonderful pictures that Spike had drawn for her and that she'd brought back with her from Julian. She sobbed, thinking that she would never see a picture of him again, the drawings, the...all of a sudden, she remembered that there were duplicates that had remained behind, at his house. That gave way to more tears, but tears of relief and a vague sense of having a purpose now.

As for Dawn, Buffy and her had argued for the better part of a week about her future. Dawn wanted to go with Giles and Willow to England to help with research, and to go to school there. They'd talked of staying together, but that didn't seem like a good option at the moment, with Buffy having neither a home nor job.

Finally, Buffy talked Dawn into the idea of her staying with their dad, Hank, at least until she finished high school. Hank was overwhelmingly glad to hear from Buffy, having feared the worst, when he'd heard of the evacuation, and eventual total destruction of Sunnydale.

Fatherly guilt also lent itself to the promise of Buffy receiving a loan-free gift of a '98 Red Subaru, with only 30,000 miles and a more than generous stipend, that he promised to send her every month, until she got on her feet.

It was a month later, and the last people to be dropped off by Giles, Willow, and Kennedy were Buffy and Dawn at Hank's. The motor home pulled up to a poshy neighborhood 25 miles north of L.A. at the address Hank had given them.

Xander had already been dropped off earlier in the day, Faith and Robin had left a few days ago for Cleveland, and Vi and the other three potentials/now slayers, were doing some shopping for things they needed at a mall a few miles away. Giles, Willow, and Kennedy were to meet up with them in an hour.

"Well, it looks like you're here," Giles said, turning off the motor. Buffy and Dawn got up, and grabbed the few belongings they had.

"I'm going to miss you guys so much!" Dawn said, hugging Giles and Willow. "You guys know that as soon as I graduate, I am so coming to England!"

"We know, Dawn, and you'll be more than welcome," Giles said, "but I think Buffy's right in having you finish high school here first. You'll be able to apply to the university near us from here, if that's what you still want then, and if you do, then..."

"I will, I will! Don't think that I'm not coming! You'd better have a place for me!" Dawn threatened.

"Always," Giles assured her. He would miss her, and when she'd grown up a bit more, he could see her possibly being something like a watcher. Her research skills were more than capable.

"You have my email, you'd better email me!" Dawn said to Willow and Kennedy.

"We will, every chance we get! I promise!" Willow said.

"I'll make sure she does," Kennedy added, hugging Willow lightly around the waist.

"Buffy!" Giles said, standing, "I'm going to miss you."

"Me, too," Buffy said, getting teary eyed, "thank you for everything."

"No, thank you, Buffy. For all your sacrifices. For Spike."

She looked at him, a lump rising in her throat. It was the first time Giles had said his name; it was a concession, of sorts. She just nodded, then quickly kissed his cheek and following Dawn, got off the motor home.

Willow followed her up the walkway, arm-in-arm.

"Buffy, I have something for you," Willow said, stopping and reaching into her backpack.

"What is it?" Buffy asked.

Willow looked at her, "It's from Spike. It's a letter, she said, handing her a bulky envelope. Please don't be mad at me, but he made me promise not to give it to you for at least a month, if he..."

"When?"

"The day before."

Buffy took the letter from her as if it were a china plate. It was wrapped in plastic.

She looked at Willow questioningly, who shrugged, "He gave it to me this way," she said.

"Thank you," Buffy said, her eyes moist with tears, as she tenderly put it into her purse. She would look at it later, when she was alone.

"Take care of yourself, Buffy. You know I'm only an email away, if you ever need me. Ever," Willow said, hugging Buffy.

"I know. I won't forget how can I? You're my best friend!" Buffy said, hugging her back.

Buffy finally let go, turning to go up the walkway. Before she got to the door, she turned and looked back once more. Willow was standing in the open doorway of the motor home. They gave each other a final wave, as the door closed. She watched, as it pulled away and went up the street until it was out of t, at, and with it, memories of the past seven years.

Talking to Willow over the past couple of weeks had helped her accept the fact that Spike was gone, accept, (gratefully) now, that she was no longer The One. Accept that she’d been given something she thought she’d never have again, except for those two days in Julian, that had opened a curtain, a small window, into what could have been, and which Spike died in order for her to have - a normal life.

END CHAPTER 2