How To Date A Vampire
folder
-Buffy the Vampire Slayer › Slash - Male/Male › Spike(William)/Xander
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
9
Views:
3,110
Reviews:
7
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Category:
-Buffy the Vampire Slayer › Slash - Male/Male › Spike(William)/Xander
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
9
Views:
3,110
Reviews:
7
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
I do not own Buffy the Vampire Slayer (BtVS), nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.
Chapter 2
I do not claim to own any of the characters; I just like to play with them. I am but a poor office clerk without two pennies to rub together and I make NO money from writing any fanfic. So, suing me would be pretty pointless and I would cry.
Spike paced nervously up and down the hallway.
Buggerbuggerbuggerbuggerbuggerbugger.
He stopped at Xander’s door and attempted to knock.
Nope. Can’t. Bollocks.
What if Xander was having second thoughts? What if Xander had been completely drunk on his two beers and was now regretting asking him out? What if he was regretting their kiss? What if at some point between last night and now Xander had gone out and got himself another bloke? Fuck, what if they were in there right now making sweet love to each other? No, Xander wouldn’t want that, not from a stranger. Hey, what if this strange bloke was trying it on against Xander’s will?!?!?!
“I’m not having that!” Spike cried as he kicked the door in.
“GAH!”
“Xan? You alone?”
“Of course I’m alone! And did you just break my door?”
“No. Yeah.”
“Do I want to know why?”
“Probably not.”
“Then I won’t ask. What’s a broken door between friends?”
“Exactly. ‘Sides, just a busted hinge. I’ll have it fixed in a jiffy.”
“Good. Okay. Yeah. Well, I’ll just be in here finishing up and you’ll be here fixing the door and…okay. Back in a minute.”
Spike watched Xander hightail it into the bathroom with a mixture of confusion and relief. Xander was being way too cool about the broken door. That was the sort of thing that usually sent him into a complete rage! Well, maybe that was a slight exaggeration. But Spike was positive that under normal circumstances Xander would have practically chewed his ear off.
Not that a little nibble wouldn’t have been nice. Maybe later.
Hey, maybe Xander was nervous, too?
**
Okay, Xander, breathe. Just breathe; it’s only Spike. You’ve known him for a long time and there’s no need to be getting the jitters. What’s he gonna do, huh? Bite?
Oh, maybe. Although that might feel real…
Stop it! Not making it any easier here.
Okay, just stop panicking. Pull yourself together, go out there and have a *great* first date. You can do this.
Xander took one last long look in the mirror. At least he looked hot. Well, he was pretty sure that he did. His vision was still a little blurry, though. But judging by the snugness of his pants, he was sure that Spike would at least see something he liked.
One last look and a deep breath and Xander left the bathroom.
“That was quick,” he noted as he watched Spike return the tool box to the shelf. “You fixed it already?”
“’Course. Told you. Only a hinge. Easy peasy.”
“Oh. I didn’t take you for a…door fixer type person. A door breaker, yeah, but not so much with the politely fixing it afterwards. Are you feeling okay?”
“Feeling just dandy.” Or sick to the bottom of my stomach. Take your pick, mate. “You alright?”
“Great!” Or sick to the bottom of my stomach. Take your pick, Spikey.
“Ready to go, pet?”
“Sure. Um, where did we say we were going?”
“We didn’t. Thought The Bronze might be nice, though. Familiar surroundings and all that. Sound alright?”
“Sounds great. What are we waiting for?” Xander asked with a nervous grin. “Oh, me?”
“Yeah, we’re waiting for you. Ready now?”
“Completely and totally.”
Spike couldn’t help himself. He looked Xander up and down and licked his lips. “You look…bloody great.”
“Really? Thanks.” Xander ducked his head and blushed furiously. “You look…actually, I have no idea how you look. Could you help me to the door?”
**
Xander looked around him. Now that he could see much more clearly, he didn’t really want to. He looked everywhere except at Spike.
What the hell is this? Why have I suddenly lost all ability to speak? I can’t even babble! Oh, my god, I’ve lost my powers, the only thing that separated me from all the normal people. Come on, Xan-man, just say something; say anything, anything at all!
“The chips are…big tonight.” I really detest myself.
Spike brought the bowl closer and picked up the top-most chip. “Yeah. Yeah, you’re right. Normally poxy little things in ‘ere.” He dug down deeper in the bowl to investigate further. “Bloody hell!” he cried, pulling out a huge chip from somewhere near the bottom. “That is the biggest sodding crisp I’ve ever seen!!”
Xander’s eyes widened. “Whoa! Are we sure it’s even a chip? Looks more like a boat! Without the sails, rope and the starboard bow, of course. And there’s no ship’s wheel. But apart from that…”
“Yeah. Yeah, I see what you mean.” Spike placed the chip in his beer and watched, disheartened, as it took on water and promptly sank. “Bollocks.”
“See, that’s why you should always buy a spare beer in case of chip-sinking emergencies. That’s just alcohol abuse. Now what are you gonna do, huh? You’re beerless. And we’re one chip down.”
“Think I’ll just buy another one, luv.” Spike froze. Not that it was particularly cold; he just went very still. I just called him ‘luv’. Bleedin’ hell! Hang on, don’t think he noticed. He kinda looks blank. Think I mighta got away with it.
“Okay.” Ohmygod. He just called me ‘luv’. Excuse me while my heart does a little squee.
“I’ll do that, then,” Spike said.
“Sure.” Great. And once again I’m reduced to one word sentences.
“You want another?”
“I’m good. Thanks.” Okay, three word sentences. Although, technically, that was two words and then one word. Yeah, that was definitely two sentences. I left a definite pause there. Did I? Geez, I’d hate to be a writer.
Spike turned towards the bar and stopped. Why in the bloody hell was he so nervous?! It wasn’t like he hadn’t been to The Bronze a thousand times with Xander in tow. Why was this so hard?
Because this time it’s a date, you plank. Ah, yes. That would be it. It was the deadly ‘Date’ word. And it was the reason that Spike felt like throwing up his half pint of beer.
Spike turned back around and studied Xander. Apparently, he was experimenting with trying to sail some of the other crisps. Yup, that was another beer ruined.
Right. It was time to get tough. This was their first date and Spike was determined that this was going to be the best first date in the history of all first dates. Yeah, it was time for something drastic.
“Xan? Wanna go see a movie instead?”
And considering that, in all likelihood, there would be bugger all showing, that was damn drastic!
TBC…
Spike paced nervously up and down the hallway.
Buggerbuggerbuggerbuggerbuggerbugger.
He stopped at Xander’s door and attempted to knock.
Nope. Can’t. Bollocks.
What if Xander was having second thoughts? What if Xander had been completely drunk on his two beers and was now regretting asking him out? What if he was regretting their kiss? What if at some point between last night and now Xander had gone out and got himself another bloke? Fuck, what if they were in there right now making sweet love to each other? No, Xander wouldn’t want that, not from a stranger. Hey, what if this strange bloke was trying it on against Xander’s will?!?!?!
“I’m not having that!” Spike cried as he kicked the door in.
“GAH!”
“Xan? You alone?”
“Of course I’m alone! And did you just break my door?”
“No. Yeah.”
“Do I want to know why?”
“Probably not.”
“Then I won’t ask. What’s a broken door between friends?”
“Exactly. ‘Sides, just a busted hinge. I’ll have it fixed in a jiffy.”
“Good. Okay. Yeah. Well, I’ll just be in here finishing up and you’ll be here fixing the door and…okay. Back in a minute.”
Spike watched Xander hightail it into the bathroom with a mixture of confusion and relief. Xander was being way too cool about the broken door. That was the sort of thing that usually sent him into a complete rage! Well, maybe that was a slight exaggeration. But Spike was positive that under normal circumstances Xander would have practically chewed his ear off.
Not that a little nibble wouldn’t have been nice. Maybe later.
Hey, maybe Xander was nervous, too?
**
Okay, Xander, breathe. Just breathe; it’s only Spike. You’ve known him for a long time and there’s no need to be getting the jitters. What’s he gonna do, huh? Bite?
Oh, maybe. Although that might feel real…
Stop it! Not making it any easier here.
Okay, just stop panicking. Pull yourself together, go out there and have a *great* first date. You can do this.
Xander took one last long look in the mirror. At least he looked hot. Well, he was pretty sure that he did. His vision was still a little blurry, though. But judging by the snugness of his pants, he was sure that Spike would at least see something he liked.
One last look and a deep breath and Xander left the bathroom.
“That was quick,” he noted as he watched Spike return the tool box to the shelf. “You fixed it already?”
“’Course. Told you. Only a hinge. Easy peasy.”
“Oh. I didn’t take you for a…door fixer type person. A door breaker, yeah, but not so much with the politely fixing it afterwards. Are you feeling okay?”
“Feeling just dandy.” Or sick to the bottom of my stomach. Take your pick, mate. “You alright?”
“Great!” Or sick to the bottom of my stomach. Take your pick, Spikey.
“Ready to go, pet?”
“Sure. Um, where did we say we were going?”
“We didn’t. Thought The Bronze might be nice, though. Familiar surroundings and all that. Sound alright?”
“Sounds great. What are we waiting for?” Xander asked with a nervous grin. “Oh, me?”
“Yeah, we’re waiting for you. Ready now?”
“Completely and totally.”
Spike couldn’t help himself. He looked Xander up and down and licked his lips. “You look…bloody great.”
“Really? Thanks.” Xander ducked his head and blushed furiously. “You look…actually, I have no idea how you look. Could you help me to the door?”
**
Xander looked around him. Now that he could see much more clearly, he didn’t really want to. He looked everywhere except at Spike.
What the hell is this? Why have I suddenly lost all ability to speak? I can’t even babble! Oh, my god, I’ve lost my powers, the only thing that separated me from all the normal people. Come on, Xan-man, just say something; say anything, anything at all!
“The chips are…big tonight.” I really detest myself.
Spike brought the bowl closer and picked up the top-most chip. “Yeah. Yeah, you’re right. Normally poxy little things in ‘ere.” He dug down deeper in the bowl to investigate further. “Bloody hell!” he cried, pulling out a huge chip from somewhere near the bottom. “That is the biggest sodding crisp I’ve ever seen!!”
Xander’s eyes widened. “Whoa! Are we sure it’s even a chip? Looks more like a boat! Without the sails, rope and the starboard bow, of course. And there’s no ship’s wheel. But apart from that…”
“Yeah. Yeah, I see what you mean.” Spike placed the chip in his beer and watched, disheartened, as it took on water and promptly sank. “Bollocks.”
“See, that’s why you should always buy a spare beer in case of chip-sinking emergencies. That’s just alcohol abuse. Now what are you gonna do, huh? You’re beerless. And we’re one chip down.”
“Think I’ll just buy another one, luv.” Spike froze. Not that it was particularly cold; he just went very still. I just called him ‘luv’. Bleedin’ hell! Hang on, don’t think he noticed. He kinda looks blank. Think I mighta got away with it.
“Okay.” Ohmygod. He just called me ‘luv’. Excuse me while my heart does a little squee.
“I’ll do that, then,” Spike said.
“Sure.” Great. And once again I’m reduced to one word sentences.
“You want another?”
“I’m good. Thanks.” Okay, three word sentences. Although, technically, that was two words and then one word. Yeah, that was definitely two sentences. I left a definite pause there. Did I? Geez, I’d hate to be a writer.
Spike turned towards the bar and stopped. Why in the bloody hell was he so nervous?! It wasn’t like he hadn’t been to The Bronze a thousand times with Xander in tow. Why was this so hard?
Because this time it’s a date, you plank. Ah, yes. That would be it. It was the deadly ‘Date’ word. And it was the reason that Spike felt like throwing up his half pint of beer.
Spike turned back around and studied Xander. Apparently, he was experimenting with trying to sail some of the other crisps. Yup, that was another beer ruined.
Right. It was time to get tough. This was their first date and Spike was determined that this was going to be the best first date in the history of all first dates. Yeah, it was time for something drastic.
“Xan? Wanna go see a movie instead?”
And considering that, in all likelihood, there would be bugger all showing, that was damn drastic!
TBC…