Once and Again

Chapter Three: Reunion

Dawn paced the floor of the hotel's lobby, nervously chewing on her fingernails. She had given herself so many mental slaps for blurting out that Ravyn was there, her head was beginning to hurt from the stress of it all.

"Dawn, sit down. You're going to wear a hole in thoor.oor." Angel told her as he watched her.

Dawn looked over at Angel as he sat on the sofa. "How could I be so stupid?"

"It's easy when it's Spike you're talking to. If he weren't so pig headed all the time, I'm sure you wouldn't have done it."

"I know, but...what if he wrecks or..."

"He won't." Angel reassured her. "He may be crazy..but he's not stupid."

Dawn ran her hands through her hair and walked over to the sofa, sitting down hard. "What do you think he's going to do?"

"Hard to say." Angel told her.

"I just wish he didn't have to see her like that." Dawn said a little sad. "What's he going to think when she just sits there?"

"Looks like you're about to find out." Jesse said as he looked out the front window. "He just pulled up."

Dawn stood up quickly from the sofa, as did Angel..as the front door flew open.

Everyone just stood watching as Spike came in, barefoot....wearing only sweat pants and a T-shirt.

"Where is she?" Spike asked as he came through the door.

"Spike...I need to talk to you first." Dawn said as she walked over to him.

"Later, now where's she at?" Spike said as he looked around the lobby.

"She's upstairs.." Dawn started, only to see him turn and head up the stairs, taking them two at a time. "Spike wait a minute!" Dawn yelled as she ran up the steps after him.

Spike was throwing open every door he came to, looking inside briefly before turning and heading to the next door. His whole body was tingling from the adrenaline rush of hearing Ravyn was still alive.

He wanted to believe it so bad, but a part of his brain told him it couldn't be her. She was gone.

"Spike, I need to tell you something first. Will you please stop?" Dawn said, pleading for him to listen. "There's something you need to know before you see her." she added as she grabbed his arm.

Spike opened the fourth door on the right, stuck his head in and turned quickly, freezing when his brain finally registered the fact that someone was in that room.

Spike looked over at Dawn briefly and was puzzled by the look on her face, before he slowly turned back around and looked into the room.

Taking a step inside, he saw her. She was sitting in the chair, her head leaning against the back. She was looking to the opposite side of the room facing away from the door. Her feet were in the chair and she was hugging her knees close to her chest.

Spike took a couple more steps moving closer to where she was. "Ravyn?" he asked in a shaky voice, barely more than a whisper.

Her long hair was covering her face as Spike moved closer. He couldn't see her. As much as he wanted it to be her...he was scared to death.

Stopping directly in front of the chair, he glanced over at Dawn who was standing in the doorway.

Spike knelt down in front of the chair so he was eye level with her. Reaching a shaky hand up, he moved her hair away from her face and felt his eyes stinging with tears as he finally saw her.

He let out a long breath he hadn't realized he was holding in. "Ravyn." Spike said softly, smiling slightly as he turned her head facing him.

Looking into Ravyn's eyes he knew instantly why Dawn was trying to stop him. There was nothing there. No sparkle he had always remembered being there. No life. Nothing.

Ravyn sat there, eyes unfocused, staring off into space. Spike watched her, her eyes cold and dead of any life.

"What's wrong with her?" he asked quietly as a few tears fell from his eyes.

"We don't know...exactly." Dawn said softly as she stepped into the room. "She's been like this since we found her."

Spike closed his eyes briefly and wiped his face before looking back up at her. Sitting up straight on his knees, Spike wrapped one arm around Ravyn's waist and one around her shoulder and pulled her forward, hugging her close to him.

Dawn watched, her own tears now coming forward as Spike pulled Ravyn from the chair and sat her on his lap. He buried his head in her shoulder and Dawn turned away, unable to watch as Spike started to cry softly, hanging onto Ravyn tightly.

Pulling the door shut, Dawn left Spike alone with Ravyn and went back downstairs.

~*~*~*~*

Spike's grip on Ravyn only tightened as the reality that she was really there hit him. He nuzzled his face into her hair and inhaled deeply, only to be disappointed to find that she no longer carried the sweet smell of Wildflowers she once had. She smelled of soap and ointment and nothing more. She was there, in his arms...but as far away as she had been for the past thirty-two years.

His tears came faster as he gently rocked her back and forth. Raising his head he looked at her face and wiped his eyes, trying to see her more clearly. He pushed her hair away and kissed her softly on the lips. "Ravyn...please say something." he whispered to her. "Anything."

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"He's been up there a while now...think we should go see if he's okay?" Angel asked Dawn quietly as the whole gang sat in the lobby lounge area.

Dawn turned her head and looked at Angel. "Yeah" she said standing up. "I'm sure he has lot's of questions."

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Spike sat, staring at Ravyn. His tears had all but stopped. The haunted, dead look on her face was tearing his heart into. He had never seen anything like it. Even Drucilla at her worst never looked this bad.

He was lightly stroking the side of her face whispering softly to her trying to get some sort of reaction out of her, only to have her sit there motionless, looking at nothing.

"Ravyn...can you hear me? Come on luv...wake up." he whispered softly. His mind was reeling with questions as he watched her.

Angel and Dawn knocked softly on the door before they both entered, pushing the door shut behind them.

"Hey" Dawn said quietly as she walker closer to where Spike sat with Ravyn. Her stomach was in knots as she looked at them. The look on Spike's face was breaking her heart. After him being alone for over eleven years, the thoughts of him being happy again thrilled her, but now, it seemed hopeless.

"Where'd ya find her?" Spike asked, never taking his eyes off Ravyn.

"In the alley beside the hotel." Angel told him. "She was being attacked by six vamps."

Spike looked over at Angel when he spoke. "Attacked?"

"Yeah, we're not sure why. We found a gold medallion of some kind where she had fell, so we figure they were either after that, sent to retrieve her or both. Really hard to say at this point."

Spike looked back down at Ravyn. "Has she not said anything?"

"Just one word." Dawn said. "Trull"

Angel and Dawn both watched as the saw Spike's whole body go stiff. He clinched his jaw tightly and slowly turned his head to look at them. His eyes were dark and had a fierce look of hatred that neither had ever seen before.

"Trull" Spike ground out between clenched teeth, looking at them hard.

Spike looked back down at Ravyn as he felt her move. She was starting to tremble slightly.

Looking back up at Dawn and Angel as she did.

"Nicholas Trull is the one who's had her." Angel told them. "She gets like that whenever his name is mentioned." he said, referring to the trembles everyone had see her do.

"She's been with him for the last thirty-two years?" Spike asked, not believing what he was hearing.

"Well, I think it was more like he had her. She was pretty beat up when we found her. Most of her cuts and bruises have healed." Angel told him.

Spike looked back down at Ravyn before placing a hand under her legs and standing. He walked over to the bed and sat her down before taking a seat beside her. He watched as she just sat there staring off into nothing.

"Is this all she does, just sit here all day?" he asked, turning her head to face him.

Angel moved closer to the bed and sat in the arm chair. "Yeah, basically. She'll do almost anything you tell her to. She even snaps out of this daze occasionally for a minute or two."

"It's time to feed her." Dawn said quietly. "I'll be right back."

Angel watched Dawn leave and turned his attention back to Spike and Ravyn. "She only eats once a day...and only if it's cold."

Spike looked over at Angel. "Cold, how can she drink it cold?"

"Don't know..apparently that's what she's use to. Look, I didn't want to say anything infront of Dawn, but you know as well as I do what causes this kind of behavior." Angel said, leaningwardward in his chair. "She had some really bad cuts and bruises on her ankles, looked like shackle marks to me."

Spike looked down at Ravyn's bare feet and could see still a few faint bruises around both ankles. The more he heard, the madder he became. He couldn't believe what he was hearing. How did she last this long?

"Why didn't he just kill her?" he asked sadly.

"You know why...he enjoys controlling people to much. I'm sure he enjoyed torturing her even more."

Spike closed his eyes briefly as images of how her life must have been flooded his mind. Guilt soon followed as he remembered how happy he had been with Buffy, knowing that Ravyn had spent those same years in her own version of hell on earth.

Dawn returned and walked over to Ravyn. "Hey, you hungry?" she asked her as she stood in front of her.

Ravyn never moved. Dawn turned and looked at Angel and rolled her eyes at him when he sat there grinning at her. "Fine, you win" she said as she handed him the mug.

Angel smiled bigger as he stood up and took the mug, walking over to the bed and kneeling in front of Ravyn. "Hey...you about ready to come out?" he asked her. " It's time to eat." he said as he grabbed her hand and placed the mug in it.

Dawn and Spike both watched as Ravyn slowly looked down at the mug before bringing it to her mouth. She drank it all, never taking her eyes off Angel as she did.

Spike watched and wondered how Angel had done that. He had been talking to her for the last hour and got nothing from her.

Ravyn slowly began focusing her eyes on Angel as he spoke to her. "Someone's here to see you." Angel told her when he noticed her looking at him. "Spike's here."

Spike reached over and turned Ravyn's head so he could see her. She blinked her eyes a few times and focused on his face.

"Hey luv...I've missed you." Spike said smiling at her.

Spike watched as Ravyn's eyes filled with tears and a frown formed on her face. She clinched her eyes shut tightly and shook her head 'no' slowly.

"Ravyn?" Spike asked when she started to cry.

She kept her eyes closed and was making small whimpering noises. Spike looked over at Angel for a second before looking back at Ravyn.

"Why'd she do that?" Spike asked, hurt by her reaction.

"I don't know" Angel told him, confused at her reaction to Spike. "Ravyn.....it's okay." he said as he took her hand in his.

Spike stood up and stepped away from the bed as Ravyn turned her head towards Angel's voice. He watched as she slowly opened her eyes and looked around. She shut them again once she saw Spike.

Dawn looked at Spike and saw the pained look on his face. She knew what he was thinking. She watched him as he slowly turned and left the room, closing the door behind him.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Angel found Spike sitting out back on the porch. He was sitting on the steps, his arms lying out on his legs. His head was hung down and Angel knew nothing he could say would make him feel any better.

Sitting down beside him, he stared out at the LA skyline before turning to look at Spike.

"You know, it's hard to tell what Trull told her." Angel told him quietly.

Spike looked up and ran his hands over his face. "I know. It's just hard seeing her like that."

"Rob seems to think she'll snap out of it once she realizes she's safe here."

Spike looked over at Angel. "And what if she don't?"

Angel shrugged him shoulder slightly. "Don't know Spike. Just give her some time. She's a lot better now than she was a week ago."

Spike stared out at the city. He knew that no matter how long it took him...Trull would pay for what he had done...painfully.

Standing, he turned back to the door. "Think I'll go up and see her. Maybe she won't freak this time." he said as he opened the door and went inside.

Angel sat there, conflicting emotions going through him. He knew Ravyn belonged to Spike, but if he didn't belong to her anymore...where did that leave them?

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Spike walked back into Ravyn's room. Dawn was pulling the sheet's up over Ravyn as she laid down.

"Hey" he said quietly.

"Hey Spike."

"She okay now?"

Dawn smiled slightly at him. "Yeah, she's probably just tired. She doesn't eat very much. Doesn't take much to wear her out."

Spike sat in the chair and stared at Ravyn. She was laying there, eyes open, staring off into space again. He sighed lightly and looked over at Dawn. "Think I'll sit here for a while."

"Okay" Dawn said smiling. "I'll be downstairs if you need anything."

Dawn turned and left the room as Spike sat there looking at Ravyn. He watched her for a while before walking over to the bed and sitting on the side. He reached up and ran his hands through her hair, pushing it back away from her face before leaning down and kissing her forehead. "Get better" he whispered to her softly.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Spike woke with a crick in his neck from sleeping sitting up in the chair. He looked over at Ravyn and was surprised to see she was looking at him. He leaned his head to the side and noticed she was actually 'looking' at him.

"Hey" he said softly to her as he sat up. "You're awake."

Ravyn blinked her eyes as she continued to look at him as he stood up and moved to the bed and sat down. She turned her head and looked up at him.

Spike smiled a little, scared to do or say to much to her.

"You're not real" Ravyn whispered as she looked up at him.

Spike reached down and ran his hand over her cheek. "I'm real."

Ravyn closed her eyes briefly and opened them back up. They both sat staring at one another, neither one saying a word. Spike frowned as he saw her eyes start to lose their focus. "Ravyn, come on stay with me." he asked her softly. He sighed heavily as she was gone again. Back to her 'dream world'.

Spike stood up and went to the door. He walked down the hall and went downstairs where he found Dawn talking to Angel.

"Hey....is Ravyn awake?" Dawn asked him.

"Yeah" Spike said as he walked past them to the kitchen.

Dawn and Angel gave each other a confused look before they followed him.

"What's wrong?" Dawn asked as she watched him heat up a mug of blood for himself.

"She said I wasn't real." Spike said sadly as the microwave beeped loudly.

"She spoke to you?" Dawn asked, excitedly.

"Yeah, right before she went back to...wherever it is she goes." he told her as he turned around. "If she can come and go out of this 'thing' she does.....then there's a way to bring her out for good."

"Well, finding a way is going to be the hard part." Angel said. "If we k'why'why' she does it, it would help."

Dawn listened as Angel and Spike discussed ways to bring Ravyn 'back' when a thought came to her.

"Do you think. maybe, I don't know...maybe she thinks there's no 'reason' to come out?" Dawn asked them both.

"What ya mean?" Spike asked her.

"Well, if this Trull guy has had her for all this time, and she thought she wasn't ever going to get away, then she would have no reason to ever 'wake up'. It was probably easier to stay 'unaware' of her surroundings. Especially if she thought 'you' weren't there." Dawn said looking at Spike. "If she said you weren't real, then it's hard to tell what this guy told her.... maybe in her mind, there's no reason to wake up."

Spike looked at Dawn and smiled. "When'd you get so smart nib. Sound like a bloody watcher now."

Dawn laughed a little. "I just seem smart because I'm surrounded by morons all day."

"Hey..." Angel said, smiling at her.

Spike sat his now empty mug in the sink and rinsed it out before turning and heading back upstairs.

"So, you think he'll be able to snap her out of this?" Angel asked Dawn as they walked back to the lobby.

"If anybody can...he can."

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Spike walked back into Ravyn room. She was still laying in the same spot he had left her in. Walking to the bed, he reached down and sat her up. Sitting on the bed beside of her he looked at her, wondering what it was she was thinking about.

"Hey...Ravyn, can you hear me?" he asked her. "I've got something to show you." he told her as he stood up and reached down, picking her up.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Dawn and Angel looked up as Spike came down the steps carrying Ravyn.

"Dawn, can I borrow your car?" Spike asked her as he stopped near them.

"Why.....you're not taking her anywhere." Angel said, looking at him.

Spike turned his head and looked at Angel. "And why the hell not?"

Angel fidgeted a little, not sure of an answer. "Well, I think it might be best to just keep her here."

Spike rolled his eyes at him before looking back over at Dawn. "So..."

"Yeah, sure." Dawn said as she reached for her keys and handed them to him.

"Thanks...be back later. Angel, you can drive her home if I'm not back before she gets ready to leave." Spike said as he turned and headed for the door.

They both watched as Spike walked out the door with Ravyn, neither knowing what he was thinking.

"Where do you think he's taking her and why?" Angel asked her.

Dawn thought a minute before her face broke out into a huge smile. "I know exactly where he's taking her." she said, smiling huge. "And I think it might just work"

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Spike parked Dawn's car and looked over at Ravyn briefly before opening the car door and getting out. He walked to the passenger side and opened her door, lifting her out and carrying her to his house.

Stepping up on his back deck, he walked across it to the other steps and started down the path to the beach.

"Ravyn, I know you can hear me." he said as his feet sank in the sand. "I need you to wake up now." he added as he walked towards the shore line.

Stopping at the water's edge, he put Ravyn's feet down and faced her towards the ocean. "There...your favorite place on earth."

Spike moved beside her and watched her face. He held her arms and pulled her forward with him, letting the waves brush against their bare feet. As the cold water hit Ravyn's feet, Spike saw her blink. He smiledhe rhe realized she was coming to.

"Hey...come on luv...wake up. Don't want to miss this do you?" he asked her as he continued to guide her into the water.

As the water slowly splashed up on the calves of Ravyn's legs, Spike let out a sigh of relief as she lowered her head and looked down. She was watching the waves as they rolled in and he knew if he could keep her focused long enough, he could finally make her see that she belonged in the here and now..not some catatonic state she had been living in.

Spike reached out and lifted her head. He smiled when she looked at him. "You ready to wake up now?" he asked her.

Ravyn looked at Spike and leaned her head to the side slightly as she watched him. He walked closer to her and laid his hand on the side of her face. "I'm here Ravyn. You don't have anything to be scared of." he told her softly.

Spike watched as tears filled Ravyn's eyes. He wiped them away as they fell and kissed her forehead before pulling back to look at her.

Ravyn lifted her hand and laid it on top of Spike's. She squeezed his hand lightly as he rubbed his thumb across her cheek.

"Spike?"

His smile brightened when he heard her. Laying his forehead against hers he wrapped his other arm around her waist. "Yeah luv...it's me."

______________________________________

Chapter Four: The Star Of Remeur


"You gonna be okay now?" Spike asked Ravyn as he continued to hold her.

Ravyn pulled her head back and looked up at him. "He'll find me." she said sadly.

"No!......he won't" Spike told her. "I won't let him take you. I promise."

Ravyn cast her eyes downward and stepped back away from him. She looked down the beach and crossed her arms over her chest. "He always finds me."

Spike leaned his head sideways and looked at her. "What do you mean...he always finds you?"

Ravyn looked back over at him. "I've managed to get away three times. The last time...."

"The last time what?" Spike asked as she stopped talking.

"The last time I made it all the way back to Sunnydale before he caught me."

Spike's eyes widened. "When?"

Ravyn looked down briefly before looking back up at him. "Just in time to see you and your Slayer getting cozy in the cemetery." she told him softly, her eyes misting up as she did.

Spike closed his eyes and let out a sigh before ing ing back up at her. She was staring down the beach and he hated himself at that moment knowing he had hurt her...again.

"Ravyn...."

"No need to explain." she said sadly, "Didn't expect you to keep her waiting forever."

Spike didn't know what to say. What could he say? Nothing would ever make what she saw any better.

"I waited for you to come." Ravyn told him quietly, wiping at her tears, "but you never did."

"Ravyn, I didn't know." Spike said, quietly as he walked closer to her.

"Is she here?"

Ravyn watched as Spike's face took on a sadness she had never seen. "No, she's gone. Eleven years now."

"I'm sorry."

Spike smiled weakly at her. "I spent twenty-one years with her....can't really complain."

"Were you happy with her?"

"Yeah...I was."

Ravyn wiped the remainder of her tears away before giving the ocean another look. "Can you take me back to the hotel now?" she asked as she turned and started walking back to the house.

Spike watched her walk away. This hadn't went exactly like he had planned. Sighing lightly, he ran his hands through his hair and followed her.

~*~*~*~

Spike watched as Ravyn sat quietly all the way back to the city, staring out her window, never saying a word. He wanted to talk to her, but didn't know what to say.

Pulling up in front of the hotel, he turned the car off and turned to look at her. "You don't have to stay here. You could have stayed at the beach house."

Ravyn turned to look at him briefly before reaching for the door handle. Spike got out of the car as she did and followed her up to the door.

"Ravyn....I....."

"You don't owe me any explanations Spike." Ravyn said, giving him a little smile. "It was a long time ago." she added before opening the door and walking in.

Everyone turned and looked at her and Spike as they walked in.

"Hey" Dawn said smiling big. "You're here....I mean like awake, here."

Ravyn smiled at her. "Yeah, seems so."

"We're really glad." Dawn said walking over to her. "Here, let me introduce everyone...incase you didn't catch it all before." she said, leading Ravyn over to the lounge are.

"This is Jesse...demon hunter extraordinaire...or so he thinks." Dawn said, whispering the last part to her.

Ravyn smiled as Jesse stood and shook her hand.

"Really nice to meet you Ravyn."

"You to."

"Next is Blake.....the bad ass of the group...well, Spike likes to argue that point, but we just ignore him." Dawn said giggling at the face Blake made at her.

"Nice to see ya awake."

"Nice to be awake." Ravyn said smiling at him.

"Hello, I'm Robert Price...but you can call me Rob." Rob said, shaking Ravyn's hand as he did.

Ravyn continued to smile as he shook her hand. "Nice to meet you Rob."

"And this...is Angel." Dawn said, walking Ravyn towards Angel.

"Hey" Angel said, smiling at her.

"Hey" Ravyn said quietly, looking up at him.

Spike looked at Angel as he stood there looking at Ravyn. He didn't like the way he was looking at her. Walking over to where Ravyn and Angel were standing, he stopped beside her and looked at her before he spoke. "I told you about Angel, maybe peaches...or the poof might ring a bell?" he said, grinning.

Ravyn turned her head and looked at Spike. "This is the vampire with a soul?" she asked him.

"Yep, that's him. Mr. Broody himself."

Ravyn turned her head and looked back up at Angel and smiled. "Well, it's nice to actually know who you are."

"Don't believe anything he say's." Angel told her, laughing lightly.

Ravyn smiled back at him. "I rarely do." Turning back to the rest of the group she smiled at everyone. "Well, I'm really tired, think I'm gonna go on up to bed."

"Yeah, sure...goodnight" Angel told her as she started to turn.

"Goodnight" she said over her shoulder as she started for the steps.

Spike watched her turn and leave without giving him another thought. He didn't know what to make of it. And not that he'd tell anyone, but he was a little hurt by it.

As Ravyn reached the top of the steps she turned and looked at him. "Night Spike" she said softly, giving him a little smile.

Spike smiled back at her. "Night Ravyn"

"So the beach worked then?" Dawn asked when Ravyn was out of sight.

"Yeah, wasn't sure if it would, but I figured it was worth a try." Spike said as he stared at the spot Ravyn had been standing.

"Well, I'm glad she better now."

Spike smiled weakly at her. "Yeah...me to. Well, I'm gonna head home." he said as he turned to leave. "See ya tomorrow."

"Okay.goodnight Spike."

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Ravyn shut her bedroom door and walked slowly to the bed. She laid down across it and pulled a pillow close to her. Burring her face in it, she cried, the sound being muffled out. The one thing she had avoided thinking about for more than thirty years, was now like a fresh wound all over again. The images of Spike and Buffy flooded her mind as did all the things Trull told her. Things would never be the same.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

The next evening, Ravyn woke feeling 'alive' for the first time in a very long time. She stood up and headed for the bathroom. After showering and putting on a pair of jeans and a tight shirt Dawn had left her, she exited her room and headed downstairs.

"Hey" Dawn said smiling as Ravyn descended the step.

"Hey Dawn."

"So, how you feel?"

"Good..I guess." she said quietly looking around. "Where's everyone at?"

"They're around here somewhere. You hungry?"

"No...maybe later."

Dawn gave her a little smile. "You really need to try and eat more than once a day. Get your strength back up."

"I know." Ravyn said as she sat down on the sofa pulling at her shirt. "I really need a few more clothes. These shirts are a little small." she said with a grin.

Dawn laughed. "Yeah, well some of us are quite as full figured as others."

"Yeah...seems so." Ravyn said giggling. "I wonder if my money's still in my accounts? You think you could check for me?"

"Yeah....I could do that."

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

"Any luck with that thing?" Angel asked Rob as he walked into Rob's office.

"No. I can't find anything on it. Even the text isn't what I thought it was."

Angel sat down on the edge of Rob's desk and picked up the piece they had found in the alley. "I guess we can ask Ravyn...now that she's 'awake'."

Rob looked up from his book and looked at Angel. "You know....Angel, I've been meaning to ask you."

Angel looked over at him. "Ask me what?"

"Well, it's just..you spent alot of time with Ravyn this past week. You haven't..."

Angel cut him oeforefore he could finish. "Look Rob, I know the situation." he said as he stood up. "Keep looking for something on that. You can ask Ravyn when her and Dawn get back." he told him as he quickly left the office.

Rob sat back in his chair and sighed lightly. "Poor fools got it bad." he said to no one shaking his head as he did.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Dawn and Ravyn returned several hours and many bags later. Laughing a little as they entered the hotel.

"Did you buy everything they had?" Jesse asked as he watched them lug in all the shopping bags.

"Just about...we think?" Dawn said giggling as they started up the steps.

Jesse just grinned at the girls as they went up the stairs and disappeared out of sight. "Women" he mumbled before he turned and left the lobby.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Spike was sitting on the back porch deck, beer in one hand, a antique carved wooden box on his lap. He was looking at all the pictures and small pieces of jewelry that had been kept safe there for over thirty years.

He held a picture of Ravyn, his favorite one. She was standing on the beach in a white sundress, her hair was shining from the sun reflecting off of it, smiling that bright smile he had missed seeing. She looked beautiful in the sunlight and he wondered if she missed it as much as he did.

He had been sitting there since he had gotten out of bed, looking at all the things he had left of her when he thought she had died. He knew he needed to give them back to her, so he wanted to look at them one last time.

The fact that she was even there at all had caused him more stress than he had ever thought it would. He didn't know what he was thinking. Did he actually think having her back would cause things to be just like they were?

Spike sighed tly tly and looked out over the ocean. He didn't even know if he could see her again and not feel guilty about how happy his life had been.

The fact that she had escaped Trull only to get back home and find him and Buffy together, was giving him a dull ache of pain he hadn't felt in a very long time.

(*I waited for you to come.....but you never did*) kept ringing through his ears. The look on her face and the tone of her voice when she whispered that one statement to him, made him wonder how she could have been alive all that time and he 'not' know. How long had she waited for him to come and get her? How long had she lived with the knowledge that he had forgotten about her and moved on with his life with Buffy before she finally shut the world out around her?

Finishing off his beer, Spike put Ravyn's things back in the box and shut the lid. He stood and entered the house before grabbing his jacket and heading out to his Bike. He knew the longer he waited to see her, the harder it would be.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Ravyn was sitting with Dawn at her desk as Dawn explained to her what exactly it was they did there. She had a hard time believing they did a 'slayers' job and actually got paid for it....well, most of the time.

"So, they've been doing this for how long?" Ravyn asked.

"Close to thirty-seven years now."

"Huh...and people actually pay them?"

Dawn laughed a little. "Well, in theory they do. Angel helps everyone that comes to him for help. Some pay him, other's don't. He just does it whether there's money in it or not."

"So, what's the deal with his soul? Spike mentioned it...well, before all this..you know, but he never said a whole lot about it."

"Well, it was a Gypsy curse. He lost it...the soul that is, once. When he found 'true happiness'"

Ravyn scrunched up her forehead at her. "What do you mean?"

"Well, the curse, having the soul was permanent, unless he found a moment of 'true happiness', which, no one knew he'd loose it if he did."

"So, what's he like without a soul?"

Dawn's face was enough answer for Ravyn.

"That bad?" Ravyn asked her.

"Way bad! Don't ever want to see that. He's one scary vamp when he's soulless."

"So, what was his moment? What made him loose his soul?"

Dawn fidgeted in her seat a little. "Well, it was....um, Buffy. That was Angel's moment of happiness."

Dawn watched as Ravyn rolled her eyes slightly and looked away.

"You know Ravyn, I know you and her didn't get along or anything, but she really wasn't a bad person."

"I'm sure she wasn't" Ravyn said softly.

"Did Spike tell you what happened to her?"

"No...he just said she was gone."

Dawn shook her head a little. "Well, it was a car wreck. I really miss her." Dawn said sadly.

Ravyn looked back over at Dawn. "I'm sure you do. I know what it feels like to loose someone you love." she said sadly.

Dawn tried to smile, but wasn't very successful.

"How did it happen?"

"She was driving home from the Magic Box. A drunk driver hit her. Some twenty-year-old kid She died instantly." Dawn told her, wiping at her eyes as she did.

"I'm really sorry Dawn."

Dawn smiled at her. "Thanks."

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Spike parked his motorcycle and grabbed the box he had Ravyn's things in. He had taken his time driving over there, not really sure of how things were going to go. He knew Ravyn had had time to think about things as he had. The big question now...where did they go from here?

Laughter was the first thing Spike heard as he walked into the hotel. Following the noise he was surprised to see everyone sitting around the lounge area, having a good time.

"Having a party without me?" Spike asked as he walked over to 'his' chair.

"Oh, hey Spike" Dawn said, still laughing slightly. "We were just telling Ravyn about some of our more interesting cases."

"Is that right?" he asked as he looked over at Ravyn. She was smiling. Not the big bright one he remembered...but it was the first one he had seen since before the warehouse.

Ravyn looked over at him. She could tell by the look on his face that he had the same questions about them as she did. She had thought long and hard about 'them' last night and knew things couldn't ever be the way they were. Being away from him for thirty plus years gives a person alot of time to analyze things, and as hard as it was to realize the truth...it was best to let him know whether he believed it or not.

"Can I talk to you?" Spike asked her as she continued to look at him.

Ravyn nodded her head and stood up as he did. She followed him out back to the porch and stood by the rail. "So, what did you want to talk about?"

Spike smiled at her. "Well, actually wanted to give you something." he said handing her the box.

Ravyn looked down at the box. She ran her hand across the carvings before looking back up at him. "What is it?"

"It's your things." he said quietly. "Figured you might want them back."

Ravyn opened the lid and was surprised to see pictures of herself. She looked up at Spike. "You kept these?" she asked him.

"Well, yeah, they're all I had left." he told her softly.

Ravyn walked over to the steps and sat down before pulling out the pictures. She started looking through them as Spike walked over and sat beside her.

"I can't believe you still have this stuff." she said smiling over at him. Ravyn thumbed through the pictures and paused when she came to one she had never seen. She looked back up at him, when she realized what it was.

"The scobbies had that made. It's still there." Spike told her smiling.

Ravyn looked back down at the picture of the pink gravestone with her name on it and smiled. "It's a nice gesture...don't know how I feel about seeing my name on a gravestone though..kinda creepy."

"And being dead isn't?" Spike asked her laughing.

Ravyn let out a little giggle. "No, unless you're human I guess."

"Yeah, well the nibblet thought I might want it. It was her idea." Spike told her as she continued to look at the picture. "They put it in the far side of the cemetery, you remember, the 'quiet place' I took you to?"

"Yeah, it was really pretty there."

"Yeah, well it's under that big tree, surrounded by flowers. Well, it was nine years ago. Hard to tell what it looks like now. Haven't been back since I left."

Ravyn sat the pictures aside and picked up the few pieces of jewelry that were in the box. "I still can't believe you kept this stuff." she said, sliding her class ring onto her finger. She smiled as she looked at it. "Kinda sad that my whole life fit into a small box though." she added as the faded envelope with Spike's name on it was found at the bottom of the box. Looking up at him she leaned her head to the side a little. "You kept this to?"

Spike smiled. "Yeah, why wouldn't I? Couldn't throw out the last thing you ever said to me."

Spike's smiled fell away as he remembered his last conversation he had had with her. All the things he had yelled at her. The look on her face as her tears rolled down her cheeks. "You know...about that night, before you went back to the warehouse...."

Ravyn looked up at him and shook her head. "Don't Spike...I know you didn't mean it."

Spike sighed and reached up, moving her hair away from her face. "No,...I didn't. But I still want you to know, that I'm sorry. I never meant to hurt you."

"I know." she said quietly as she looked at him. He looked exactly the way she remembered him. Same big blue eyes that made her feel like she was melting. Same smile, same walk....everything she loved about him but pushed away. The memory of him hurt to much to bear.

Looking away quickly she smiled as she replaced the things back in the box and stood. "Think I'll go back inside." she said as she started for the door. "Thanks...for this." she told him, holding the box.

Spike nodded his head at her and watched her walk inside. He was almost saddened as he remembered the way she had just looked at him. No longer did her eyes tell him all the things she felt. He didn't see her love for him shining back at him.

Looking out at the city, Spike sighed lightly before standing. Turning to the door, he walked inside the hotel and found her sitting in the lounge area, holding the box close to her.

"Ravyn." Rob said as he walked over to where she was sitting. "We found this in the alley where you were being attacked. We were wondering if you knew what it was?" he asked as he held out the gold triangle for her to see.

Ravyn took it from his hand and looked at it. "Yeah, I know what it is." she said looking up at him.

Angel walked over to her and sat beside her. "What is it?"

Ravyn looked up at him and saw Spike out of the corner of her eye watching her. Handing the piece to Angel she glanced at Spike before looking back at Angel. "That is the fourth point to 'The Star Of Remeur'."

Angel turned and looked at Spike quickly as he walked over to the sofa where Ravyn and Angel sat.

"You're kiddin right?" Spike asked her.

"Nope...afraid not." Ravyn told him as Spike took the piece from Angel.

"But The Star Of Rameur is only legend." Rob said, more than interested as he also approached the sofa.

"It's no legend. It's real." Ravyn told him.

"Where did you get this?" Angel asked her.

"From Trull"

Angel, Spike and Rob all went wide-eyed at her statement.

"Bloody Hell...I guess we know now who 'reds' Master was." Spike said as he sat down on the table.

"Yeah guess so." Angel replied. "Ravyn, does Trull have anymore pieces of this?"

"Yeah, he has three more points. This is the fourth."

"Does he know where the other's are?" Rob asked her.

"What the hell are you guy's talking about?" Blake asked, confused about the whole conversation.

Rob looked up at him. "The Star Of Remeur is a legend. It supposedly makes the wearer invincible. Nothing can kill him." he told the others in the room. "A vampire wearing this medallion would be unstoppable, or so I've heard. Father studied it but was never able to prove it's existence."

"Well, guess ole Wes will be pleased to find out it's real." Blake said smiling. "Give the old man something to brighten up his day."

"Yes, I'm sure it will." Rob said smiling, thinking of how long his Father had researched the piece. "You know, he may still have his notes around. I guess I could go see him and ask."

"Ravyn, does he know where the other pieces are?"

Ravyn looked over at Angel when he spoke. "Yes, the fifth piece is here...in LA. He was planning on getting it the night I escaped. I snatched this before I left."

"How does it work?" Dawn asked, interrupting Angel and Ravyn's conversation.

"The Star Of Rameur..is an amulet. All the pieces fit together. The five triangles make up the outer edges of the star. The center is a large Ruby called 'The Blood Stone'." Ravyn told her.

"And you learned all this how?" Rob asked her, interested in how she had learned so much about the mystical legend.

Ravyn looked over at him and smiled. "I was with him for a long time...I may have been zoning out the things around me, but I could still hear."

"Yes" Rob said smiling at her. "So, where is the blood stone?"

"Brazil"

Everyone sat staring at either Ravyn or the fourth point of the star, questions running rampant through there mind.

"This medallion also makes the wearer a day walker." Ravyn said as everyone got quiet. "If Trull gets his hands on all six pieces, no one will be able to stop him." she said quietly.

Spike looked over at Ravyn and could see her fear for Trull rolling off her in waves. If he was able to get the Star, there would be nothing anyone could do to stop him. "Well, I suggest we make sure he doesn't get his hands on the last three pieces then." he said looking over at Angel. "Better find a safe place for that."

"Yeah" Angel said as he handed the piece back to Rob.

"Ravyn, does he know you have this?" Spike asked her.

"Yes...he knows." she said with a slightly shaky voice. "That's why he won't stop looking for me. He's been looking for this medallion for over twenty years. He's not going to stop now when he's so close."

"He won't find you." Angel told her as he noticed how scared she looked.

Ravyn looked over at Angel, not believing a word he was saying. She knew Trull better than anyone, and what he wanted...he got. Only question was, how long till he found her.