Love Hurts

Chapter 17


Her eyes were tightly shut, yet blinked with each discharge from the gun that was held over her head. Her hands covered her ears and still she was deafened by the loudness. Her breathing was rapid to the point were Buffy swore she'd hyperventilate. Never had she been so scared.

The F.B.I.. agent that pinned her down shouted something and she felt herself being hauled up and her feet buckle under her as he started to run back across the lawn. Disoriented beyond all else, it took Buffy a while to get her co-ordination under control enough to run too. At the edge of the lawn, under the cover of shrubs and trees, she was handed over to group of agents, who bustled her into a dark sedan and driven away at speed. Shaken, shocked and still confused, not to mention partially deaf, she sat there wondering what the hell was going to happen next.

Back at the house, Angel, Penn and the others were now cuffed and in the process of being lead out to vans. Police cars, plain cars with flashing lights and several ambulances lined the drive. Helicopters swung their lights over the house and buzzed low overhead. The F.B.I.. had really covered all areas in their quest. The easy part of the case was over, now the hardest part could be put in motion, depending on whether Buffy agreed. It also depended on Angel's co-operation.


Spike paced outside of the headquarters that the F.B.I.. were using as a temporary base. He had been restless, unable to sit still since they told him they were mobilizing units and would hopefully, with all being well, have Buffy back before dawn. He trod on the butt of the cigarette he had just finished and sighed. This was worse than anything he had been through before, including the first time Angel had taken her. At that point, he had his own rehabilitation from the near fatal gun shot to go through and that consumed most of his time and thoughts.

He shoved his hand into his trouser pocket and bought out the crumpled fag packet, seeing only three left, he hesitated at lighting another, then shook another cigarette out and lit it. His throat was tight and ached, mostly from the suppression of his emotions, but the amount he had smoked wasn't helping. He was so sunk in his own thoughts that he hadn't noticed the young woman approach. Her hand touch him lightly on the arm, making him jump.

"Fuck! ... Sorry, didn't see you there. " Spike looked down as she held out a strong black coffee. Spike took it from her and smiled sadly. "Thanks. "
"It's fine, I saw you pacing and thought you could do with some refreshment. "

"Appreciate it, love. Any word? "

She shook her head and took a sip from her own coffee. She watched his face fall just a little more and felt a pang of regret that she had no news. She left him alone in his thoughts, hoping that they would have some news for him soon.

Spike watched out of the corner of his eye, glad that she had left him. It wasn't personal, he just didn't feel like having company at that moment. His mind was too occupied, he was too worried about Buffy to be anything but bad company himself.

Buffy sat huddled between two huge men, both dressed in black suits, guns in hand and looking ahead. The passenger in the front seat turned to look at her over the head rest and smiled.

"I trust you're not injured, Buffy? "

Buffy shook her head, a frown creased her brow. "No, who are you? Where are you taking me? "
"Sorry, my name is Hendrikkson, I'm F.B.I.. I hope you're not going to make me flash me badge, it's a tad cliche. " He smiled.

Smiling was the last thing Buffy felt like doing, despite his attempt at humor. "Where are we going? "

"We're going to take you to the hospital to get checked out, standard procedure. Then we'll be taking you back to the local police station. "

"I'm fine, I'm not hurt, there's no reason to take me to hospital. I just want this over with and see Spike. "

"Spike is waiting for you at the station, but if you prefer, we can get an agent to bring him to the hospital? "

Buffy nodded. She realized that they had to follow procedure. If it meant that she'd see Spike sooner, then she'd go along with their wants and wishes.


Spike sat down on the curb outside the station and hung his head, his hands ran through his hair and clasped at the back of his neck. Tension had set in and both his neck and shoulders ached with it. Heeled shoes clicked on the pavement and drew his attention. The woman who brought his coffee stood above him. She smiled.

"I've been sent out to get you. They've got your girlfriend and are taking her to the hospital to be checked over. They'll be bringing her back here once she's given the all clear. "

He smiled at her, albeit a tense one.

" One of the agents will be done in a few minutes to take you to her. They said that Henrikkson radioed in to say that she was kicking up a storm about going. The only way that could get her to agree to go to the hospital was to take you. Anyway, they'll be done soon. "

His smile widened, that was his girl. His feet shifted and he bounced on his feet. "Thanks love, well don't just bloody stand there, go and get the bloke that's taking me! "

She nodded and as she went back into the building, snorted. Why couldn't she find someone like him?

Buffy was in the center of the bulky men as they marched her into the hospital. Henrikkson had contacted the hospital and warned them that they would be bringing her in. Alerted that a high profile case was coming in, the hospital porters had cleared a private room ready for their arrival. As they entered the rear entrance, a wheelchair was brought out, Buffy was bundled into it and whisked down to the private room. Once inside, two men took posts outside and she was told to sit up on the bed. Henrikkson asked Buffy to strip off and change into the hospital gown. He explained that it was part of the procedure and might give them evidence. Buffy did as she was asked and sat back on the bed. The porter left and a doctor stepped forward. He introduced himself and started the checks. After her blood pressure and temperature was taken, the doctor took some blood and then examined her for any other injuries. He asked questions and she answered. Her eyes stayed on the door, hoping that Spike would walk through it at any moment.

She heard voices outside the door and her heart raced with anticipation. The door swung open and a whirl of black rushed in like a tornado. It snatched her up and pulled on her. She blinked and breathed then. He was there, really there and was holding her against the hardness of his chest. His hands soothed and smoothed down her hair and then her shoulders. He held her away from the sanctuary of his body and looked her over. His cool, moist lips kissed everywhere until finally, they met hers.

Buffy and Spike became aware of the audience when Henrikkson cleared his throat. Reluctantly, Spike stopped kissing her and turned his body towards the agents. Henrikkson introduced himself and explained that they would need to ask Buffy a few questions. Buffy leaned against Spike and yawned. Now that the excitement was over, the adrenalin was wearing off, leaving her exhausted. While Henrikkson felt for her, they needed to talk to her while her memories were still fresh.

"I'll try, but I'm tired and my heads a little fuzzy. "

"That's fine Buffy. We understand, but anything, no matter how small, could help us a lot. "

Buffy nodded and answered what she could. Henrikkson seemed pleased and left. The doctor gave Buffy the all clear and released her after a few hours.The F.B.I. arranged a hotel suite for them to stay in for the duration of the investigation. Of course they had guards staying with them, and two stationed outside the room, guarding the door.

Spike had been talking to one of the agents that had been at the first meet, Matthews, in the large lounge area while Buffy was in the shower.He gave Spike some medication that the hospital had provided and suggested that he give Buffy the sedatives so she could sleep.

She now stood at the end of the bed, looking at it. It had been the assumption that she and Spike would share the main bedroom while the others would bunk down wherever possible. Now though, fear and uncertainty gripped her.

Since Angel had kidnapped her again and then Spike had arrived at the hospital, everything had been a whirlwind. Now that life had calmed down and resumed it's normal pace, or as normal as it could get at the moment, everything hit her. She hadn't had a chance to tell them that technically, she was now married to the monster that had caused this whole situation. How was she supposed to tell Spike? Would he understand that it was beyond her control? That she had to do it or else he would be killed. She glanced over her shoulder as Spike walked into the room and shut the doors.

Spike stood with his back to the closed doors and just watched her. Buffy was looking at the bed and was obviously deep in thought. He longed to take her in his arms, to kiss her all over, hold her, make love to her and erase any trace of that evil son of a bitch. Matthews had spoken to him and mentioned that victims that had been through the same situation as Buffy, often shut down their emotions. He asked him to approach her and suggest counseling. Spike knew that Buffy had been strong before this, but seeing her now, it scared him. Maybe his girl did need help.

"Pet? "

She didn't show any response.

He inched closer until he was stood beside her, but a good step away. "Love? "

Buffy didn't look at him. Inside her heart was breaking. Her fear was that he would leave after she told him that she had allowed Angel to make love to her and that he had blackmailed her into marrying him. She was scared that Spike would walk away, saying that she wasn't worth it. That he didn't love her enough to go through it all.

Buffy wet her lips and closed her eyes as she prepared herself for the admission.

Spike could see the tension in her posture, he could see that something was troubling her and that she was trying to work something out. When he saw her wet her lips and close her eyes, he knew she was trying to tell him something. His nerves were frayed, his fear that she would end it, give up on them, rose.

"I ... " she started. His eyes lifted from the floor and watched as she tried to gather herself. "I have something to tell you. You might want to sit down. "
"I'm fine. What is it, love. " He saw her close her eyes again when he said 'love. ' It didn't look good.

" The first time he took me, I thought you were dead, that he had killed you. I had nothing to lose, except myself. I refused to do that, instead I stayed strong, gathered as much evidence against him as I could and waited until I could get away from him. "

Spike froze in lace and listened, not sure where she was going with what she was saying. His heart was pounding and his chest was tight.

" This time, I was weak. "

Spike closed his eyes tight as the emotions in her voice affected him and made him want nothing more than to hold her tight and sooth away all her pain.

" He told me he loved me. "

Pain shot through Spike, hit his heart and shook his whole being.

" He said that he would never let me go. He said that he would kill you if I didn't .... " Buffy sighed heavily and wiped tears away from her face with the heel of her palms. " I let him, let him make love to me. "

Tears welled up in Spikes eyes as she carried on.

"I hate myself for it, for letting him but what choice did I have? Do you know what was happening when they found me? " She saw him shake his head out of the corner of her eyes. " We were getting married. He had it all set up. The whole thing . Even his mother was there. " She gave a small laugh. " His mother liked me, can you believe that? "

Spikes eyes widened. Shocked, his legs felt weak and threatened to give way. He sat on the edge of the bed and looked up at her. Tears were now flowing freely down his face.

They both froze were they were, tears flowed down their faces and thoughts ran wild. The silence in the room was deafening and seemed to last forever.

Spike sniffed and let out an audible sigh. "Buffy, I.... "

She looked at him, held his gaze and silently pleaded with him to tell her that it was okay, that everything was all right.

"I love you , more than anything. The only thing I care about is you. That you're all right. Everything else can be sorted out. We'll find out if the marriage is legal and deal with it if it is... "

She nodded but still seemed distant. Spike rolled the sedatives around in his hand and then held it out to her. "The doc at the hospital gave Agent Matthews these for you. He said they'd help you sleep. Why don't you take them and get into bed,love. Maybe some decent rest will make you feel better. I'm not going anywhere unless you tell me to. We'll talk in the morning and get everything sorted.

Buffy looked down at the bullet shaped pills and then looked at him. He looked so distraught. Guilt drowned her heart and mind, she wanted it to stop. She was exhausted and needed to sleep but knew that she wouldn't be able to naturally. Buffy took them from his hand and threw them into her mouth and then took the glass of water that he held out for her. She shuddered as she swallowed them and then drank the rest of the water. Spike took the empty glass from her and stood up, allowing her to slip under the covers. She turned her back to him and yawned. Feeling dejected, Spike went to leave. As he opened the bedroom door, Buffy shifted on the bed, he looked back at her and saw her looking at him.

"Don't go. Stay, please? "

He studied her before closing the door again. "You sure, pet? "

"I don't want to be alone tonight. I need you with me. "

Without anything else being said, Spike slipped his jacket and tie off, he sat on the end of the bed and removed his shoes and socks. He pulled his shirt over his head rather than unfasten each button and then unhooked the fly of his trousers. He got into the huge bed and laid beside Buffy without touching her.

Buffy waited until Spike was settled and then crossed the gap to lay against his side, her head on his shoulder, arm across his chest. Spike looked down at her and wrapped his arms around her protectively. It wasn't long before the sedatives worked and Buffy was breathing deeply in her sleep. The rhythm soon lulled Spike to sleep too, both wrapped around each other, safe at last.