Happy To Bleed For You

At night all alone my mind is swayed
bullets such a joyful thought,suicide to persuade
And everytime I'm broken,
I feel I'll never get away.
Sometimes the pain's too much to bear
like dying from a loss of air
and I pray to god that it's the end
But I know it's just starting up again-(Rachel)

Broken.

(Bpov)

Such a darkness. Inticing,addicting,consuming,burning,filling,hurting...conflicting emotions.

I know now why Faith liked to run...running is such a pleasurable experience. The rush of air blowing in your face,wiping your hair back slick against your shoulders and head,your problems slowly fading in the distance. There's something about running that gives you an edge and small rush of excitement. There's something about running that satisfys. There's nothing like the the feeling of your lungs burning more and more with each step and your chest heaving,nothing like the burn of your muscles contracting and straining against the odds to keep going.

I don't know where I'm going. I don't know what's going to happen. I'm simply running from the sight of Faith lying hopelessly on the floor, broken and bleeding. I'm running from accepting responsibilty. I'm running from the reality that I raped and maimed Faith. And I'm running because somewhere deep inside of me...I enjoyed it. I felt a deep satisfying pleasure watching Faith slowly crumble like a great wall that had stood for so long finally being torn down. I broke Faith with my hands...And I enjoyed it. And I hated it. So many conflicting emotions.

If I run I won't be caught. If I run I won't have to face it...

If I run,I won't be broken.

(Kpov)

There truly is nothing worse than watching someone you care about break down like this. I always thought I was a cold mean little kitty,and that I didn't give a rats' ass about anyone but myself. I always said I would be the lone wolf,the last girl standing amid the chaos. I was wrong.

It hurt me so bad to watch Sammy subscum to her grief. A pang of sorrow pulsing throught me at the sight of her bleeding hand and emotionless catatonic face. Sammy was the last person I ever thought could become so cold and unfeeling. Sammy was the last person I thought capable of falling so hard.

Since I met her that night at Buffy's house,I saw only this strong caring girl. A smile almost always on her face,always good natured and willing to share her laughs. She was a symbol of dignity and love. She always wore her heart on her sleeve and never failed to show she cared. She was always so open and just this general magnet of everything that meant strength. And when she and Faith got together in was ten fold. There was always this radiance that followed her around. Sam always showed her deeply she loved Faith and that made her stronger.

But Faith was her weakness. Faith cut a tiny hole in her heart and replaced it with herself and Sammy was happy to share. Now Faith was broken. And Sammy was feeling it a million times over.

I felt cold speaking to her in the kitchen. And I felt afraid. Something that never in a thousand years I would have dreamt of feeling from Sammy. Her sensational grey eyes which once shone were dull and numb. Her once briliant smile was a straight line across her face.

It's scary how you can lose someone so fast. What's scarier is that sometimes someone can fall so low and deep you can never pull them back up to the surface...and this is what I fear now. I know Faith is a slayer and will heal. And even though Faith had changed she had never been one to let feelings get in her way.

But Sam...Sam was all about feeling. And I'm afraid we've lost a part of her.


(Wpov)

I know what I'm about to say is selfish but I have to. I'm so glad I fell in love with a simple girl like Kennedy. I know I'm usually the calm one in a panic-y situation,but I don't think I'd be able to survive if something like this happened to Kennedy and I. Something so cataclysmic and deep would kill me. Especially with what happened to Tara not too long ago. I know. Saying something like this means that I love Kennedy deeply and that I've gotten over Tara. But I will always love Tara,I'll never forget her. And I'm sure Tara wouldn't want me to greif forever. In fact, I'm sure she's rather happy for me now that I've found Kennedy.

Kennedy. She's a complete mystery yet all I need to do is look at her to know what I need to. She's a little like Faith sometimes and I chuckle when I think they could be related in some way. I wouldn't be surprised. They both have the whole tall,dark,and extremely hot thing going on. Intensified by their deep honey eyes and all over sexiness. But what stands out more is their attitude. If you really look at it sometimes they seem like bickering children and it's rather cute and charming. And then sometimes they're so intense you feel like a microbe under a telescope.

But there's a great difference that makes Faith, Faith and Kennedy, Kenndy. Faith can't deal. Kennedy can. Faith is my friend and Kennedy is the love of my life and...and I'm blabbing in my thoughts now. Way off topic here.

I feel very bad for Sammy. All she's been since she got here is supportive and understanding. The poor girl can't catch a break and just when life seems to be getting a little easier,ends up in the hospital. Which by the record,I'm still wondering about,isn't she an immortal? Anyways so she ends up a whole week in the hospital,and Faith dumps her for Buffy.

Well okay maybe she didn't dump her for Buffy,by what she said it sounded more like Faith was trying to protect her. But what do you protect an immortal from? Didn't Faith know that?! And then to put the cherry on top,it turns out Buffy was possessed the whole time and she nearly just about killed Faith.

Now I'm a witch but even if I wasn't,it wouldn't take a rocket scientist to see that Faith is really hurt this time. Not just physically,cause Faith was born for punches. But emotionally. She's been hit where it really hurts and it's left her shattered. And not too far behind is Sammy.

I sigh and get out of bed as queitly as I can,trying not to wake my girlfirend deep in sleep. The clock reads four,barely an hour after finding Faith and Sammy. For some weird reason I can't sleep. There's something bothering me but I can't quiet place it so I decide to go and check on Faith. I plant a small kiss on Ken's nose,grinning when she gives this goofy totally childish cute sloppy smile. Nothing like a sleeping Kennedy to kick up high than heaven.

It's rather cold in our house. I search around in the darkness until I find Ken's leather jacket,slipping it on when I do and I creep towards Sammy's open door. I grab onto the frame and lean the top half of my body over far enough to catch a glimpse.

"Ah!" I gasp,quickly covering my mouth with my hands so I won't wake anybody. What I see is both so beautiful and heartbreaking that I can't help the tears that slip out of my eyes. Faith's face is scruntched up,a light sheen of sweat covering her pale skin,her body hidden under the covers. Sammy is on her side facing Faith. Her forehead is flush with Faith's cheek and her lips in a sort of pout on her chisled jaw. Sammy's head is propped on her right arm,and her left is wrapped protectively and lovingly around Faith's waist over the covers,her eyes hidden by the long waves of shining black hair falling from her head.

As peaceful as it seems however,Sam's face looks like a ghost,whitely pale,blank and her cheeks hallow and sunken in. She's mumbling something in her sleep and I faintly catch the word Faith a few times.

Poor Sam. I wish there was something I could do to stop the pain. But there's only one person that can do that. There's only one person that can save her,only one person that can mend her heart,and piece back her broken soul.

"Faith please." I whisper so softly that the night breeze carries my words away. I say no more. I know my words will fall upon deaf ears.


(Npov)

"Damnit!" Punch. "Damnit!" Kick,cross,jab. "Damniiiiiit!" Kick,punch,stab,kick stab,kick stab.The vampire goes sailing through the air stopping only when Raemeus sticks out a spear to impale him through the heart. Luc watches coldly from his spot against the cold ragged cave wall. Before he can react,Raemeus reaches out and takes his throat giving it one powerful squeeze which knocks him to the ground almost dead.

"Damnit it to hell!" he shouts again kicking Luc's morphed face. "I pratically gift wrapped her for you and you still couldn't kill her! You sorry devil!"

Luc snarls,swiping his nails at his feet only to miss and be kicked again,blood flying from his mout as three of his teeth are kicked out.
"Fuck! Raemeus Victor had her! How were we supposed to know the immortal would-Ahhhhggghhh!"

Raemeus snaps his femur in half with an enraged stomp. He is no longer and control and his horns are protruding from the skin around his forehead,the flesh peeling away to reveal the morphed canines and yelloe burning eyes of a vampire,but the overall celestial beauty of a noble god. "The immortal is not fucking alive! The immortal doesn't exsist I made sure of that! That stupid girl is noone now but another meal on the menu. She's as special as Scooby fucking Doo as Superman's birthday party!"

"There's something strange about her! I was watching the whole time! Something's changed in her Raemeus!"

"I don't fucking care! I'm tied of the damn slayer and her pesky followers! I myself will take her out!" Raemeus stomps away before he looses his grip on his anger and kills Luc. He sees the full moon drift over the sky and stars. In just less than a week there will be a new moon. And before the night is out the slayers will be gone from this world with a cry of pain.

(Npov)

Kenedy groaned,flipping over in the bed and tossing the sheets over her face,what the hell was all that ruckus? She tried to ignore it,but it was very amplified and she couldn't get it out of her head. Sighing in fustration she tossed the sheets of off herself and headed for the source of the damned noise.

Okay. So maybe it wasn't a ruckus. It was Sam putting on her black jeans and matching tank top, accompanied with her button black longsleeve and converse. Well you couldn't blame her what with the potiential slayer hearing junk and all. Sh blinked her eyes to clear out the sleep and squinted at the digital red numbers of a the clock on the wall. It was barely one in the morning! What was her problem! Hadn't staying up all night with Faith, checking her injuries not enough!?

"Sam. You haven't didn't sleep last night. It's one in the morning where are you going? Sleep deprivation causes insanity in slayers you know?"

"Just go back to bed Kennedy."

"Sammy-"

"Don't worry."

"Too late for that one cause I'm worried."

"I'll be back in a couple of hours. I just need to go for a walk." she didn't wait for Ken's answer. The door was closed before she could take her next breath. Everyone one had been so worried since last night's breakdown in the kitchen and it was suffocating her. That and the constant headache she kept getting all throughout the entire day. So getting out for a little stroll and a slay wouldn't hurt and if it did at least she knew she wasn't dead the way she felt