Brown Eyes Blue

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Chapter 16:

Steps

Twelve steps-that’s the approach most addicts use to face their addiction. The first step is realizing there is a problem-admitting it to yourself, next-admitting it to those who care about you. This was that step-coming to England, facing her fears. Willow’s mind ran wild-busy as always as she rode in silence. Tara’s hand in hers kept her calm and helped her face her problems- ‘Goddess what will I do-how will I face life after she is gone?’ that question played in her mind, thunderously loud in the quiet of the car. The redhead’s tears threatened to fall but she fights them back not wanting anyone to see her weakness. ‘But I am weak,’ she protested to herself, ‘That’s why we’re here.’

The three women each look out the window as the car moves through the large gates of the coven. They stare at the old buildings and from the front seat they hear Giles’s voice, “Once we arrive they will want to speak with each of you separately.”

“Why?” Asks Kennedy.

“Protocol I suppose,” he turns back around in his seat and the driver speaks to him quietly. “Of course,” he assures the man. The car comes to a stop in front of a regal looking complex. The driver leaves without speaking, followed by Giles and then the girls.

“Amazing,” says Tara, her fingers entwined with Willow’s.

“Wow,” is the redhead’s only voiced reply as she tightens her hold on her girl’s hand.

“It’s okay,” whispers Tara.

Kennedy turns around looking at all angles of the place, “It’s like a fortress.” When she’s still again she faces the couple. “Cool.” They both smile.

“This way,” instructs Giles and they follow him inside.

As the door closes behind them a woman speaks, “I am Althennea, which of you is Willow?”

The redhead looks at her blonde who smiles reassuringly at her, “Ah-that’s-that’s me.”

The woman smiles, “If you’d come with me dear.” The woman touches her arm.

Willow backs away and faces Tara, “Tara?” Fear fills her voice. “Can Tara come too?” She turns from her girl to the woman.

“I’ll see you in a little while. She needs to talk to us one at a time remember? -Giles told us in the car.” Tara answers for the woman.

“I remember.” She turns to Kennedy. “Kennedy-”

The young Slayer-to-be smiles, “Got it covered-don’t sweat it. I'll make sure she's okay.”

Tara presses a chaste kiss to her lips then Willow follows the woman from the room. Tara watches her out of sight, she turns when she feels a hand on her shoulders and is surprised that it is Giles. “She’ll be okay.” Tara nods but tears still slip out. “Tara call me when you’re ready to return and I’ll make the arrangements. Keep us informed of the progress if it’s allowed.”

“I will and thank you.” She kisses his cheek.

He turns to the young Slayer-to-be, “Be vigilant.”

“Count on it.” She nods. He leaves without further conversation. When the door closes Tara jumps slightly startled. Kennedy walks to her and puts a hand on her arm she forces a smile hoping to calm her fears. “She’ll be okay.”

Another woman walks into the room and smiles pleasantly, “If you follow me, I’ll show you to your rooms.”

“Thank you,” says Tara and they walk behind the woman.

Willow stands in a library of sorts. The woman she left with, Althennea, sits and looks up at her. “You’re quite safe here.”

“I just-I’d be better if Tara were here,” her eyes tentatively meet Althennea’s.

“I understand but initially that can’t be-if we could begin then you could return to her.”

“Okay-” concedes the redhead. She remains standing behind a high back chair-barely visible to the woman.

“How long have you been practicing?”

“Ah-I started about five years ago.”

“Who did you apprentice under?”

“Apprentice-no no one. I learned from books-then I meet Tara and we did spells together.”

“Do you remember your first spell?”

“Just little things-they mostly went kapluey,” admits the witch.

“Kapluey?”

“They didn’t work right all the time.”

“I see-”she pauses and then asks.“Do you know why?”

“Then, no.-Now, yes I lacked focus, control-I had power but I didn’t know what to do with it.”

“Understandable,” conveys the older witch. “Do you remember the first big spell you did?”

“Angel-Angelus-I put his soul back.”

“The Angelus?” Willow nods, “A curse?- You re-cursed him with a soul?”

Again the redhead nods, “Is that bad?” Worry covers her face.

“It explains some things.” Willow starts to pace- “Tell me about meeting Tara.”

The young woman smiles, “She’s my always.” She nervously bites her bottom lip- “When I meet her she taught me about magicks...”

Upstairs Tara is alone in a large bedroom-more like a suite. She busies herself putting away their clothes. An adjoining door opens and Kennedy comes in. “It’s a bathroom-it divides the room. That’s cool!” Tara can’t help but smile at her enthusiasm. The younger woman continues-“And did you see the bathtub?” Tara shakes her head and then yelps as Kennedy drags her into the bathroom. “It’s freaking amazing!”

Tara continues to smile at the teenager as she takes in the sight of a freestanding large clawfoot tub, “It’s definitely big-big enough to swim in.”

“Swim-you’re here with your girl and swim is the first thing that comes to your mind?” Kennedy asks.

Tara instantly blushes, then she rolls her eyes at the Slayer-to-be.“Is that all you think about?”

“I’m seventeen so pretty much-yeah-except for the whole stopping the world from ending thing.”

“Glad you made time for that,” Tara teases. “Did you unpack?”

“No-” her smile leaves. “That’s no fun.”

“True, but necessary-or you’ll be all wrinkly.” Tara makes a face and Kennedy’s smile returns. “Want some help?”

“I wouldn’t say no-” says the young would be Slayer as she raises an eyebrow teasingly. Again she takes Tara by the arm and pulls her into her room.

Tara walks toward the suitcase by the closet and starts to pick it up, “Where do you want it?”

“No, I got it-” Kennedy moves across and picks up the suitcase and puts it on the bed. As she opens it Tara sits on the bed watching her put things away. After nearly emptying the suitcase she looks up at Tara and raises an eyebrow. “You’re helping how exactly?”

“Supervising-” she smiles.

The teenager shakes her head, “That’s so not right.”

“Fine-” she stands and turns pulling the next item out which happens to be a silk nighty. “Okay-” she turns red and drops it back in the suitcase. “Think I’ll let you finish.” Still blushing she turns to leave. She stops at their shared bathroom door. “Come back over when you finish?”

Kennedy nods and watches Tara leave her room. She bites at her bottom lip, she lets out a sigh-‘Forget it, don’t even think about going there.’ She turns back to the suitcase and picks up the silk gown-she stares at it in her hands. “Damn.” She thinks-‘I am so gonna mess this up.’

Later Willow walks into the room and finds Tara talking with Kennedy. “Hey-” she says softly.

Her blonde rises from her chair and then walks to her enveloping her in a hug, “You okay?” She presses a kiss to her temple.

“I guess-she wants to see you now.”

“Okay-” she looks toward the teenager and Kennedy nods slightly.

“I’ll show her the bathroom while you’re gone,” a smile covers her face.

“You do that-” Tara smiles and her witch simply looks confused. “After the tour maybe you could sleep just a little.”

“When you come back,” a soft knock on the door causes the redhead to turn.

Kennedy moves across and opens it, and Althennea is there. Tara kisses Willow on the lips, “Be back soon.” She walks to the door and leaves with the woman.

Kennedy closes the door- “So-wanna see the tub?”

“I worry about you,” smiles the witch then like Tara she squeals as Kennedy drags her into the adjoining bathroom.

Once there Willow just stares, “Wow!”

“Nice huh?”

“You could swim in there-” her words echo Tara’s and Kennedy laughs. “What?”

“Nothing-want some tea?”

“There’s tea?” she smiles.

“This is England; pretty sure there’s tea-it's probably a law. I'll find you some.” She starts back through the bedroom and Willow follows. At the door she stops and looks at the redhead, “Getting you tea is hard if you’re with me.” She suddenly sees the girl’s fear. “But it is a big place-could use some help.”

Willow smiles, “I’m thinking the first floor-” they go out the door together.

Meanwhile, Tara is sitting with the coven leader. “Tell me about your power?”

“Mine?-There’s not much to tell. Willow is way stronger.”

“How long have you been practicing?”

“Always-since I was little. My mother taught me.”

“It was you that had Mr. Giles call us, why?”

“She’s-I-I w-was a-afraid,” her stutter returns. “For her-” she gets herself back under control with a deep breath. “She’s been having dreams-visions. She’s not been sleeping w-well and the magics are stronger than she is sometimes.” Tears form in her eyes but don’t fall.

“That’s why you initiated the cleansings?”

“Y-yes and they worked for awhile but now-” she shakes her head. “Not so much-not as long.”

“Tell me about the ritual to bring the Slayer back.”

“She told you?” Tara seems surprised. Althennea nods. “W-we-she summoned Osiris-” her words stop.

In the room Willow is sleeping while Kennedy sits across the room in a chair just watching her. She hears her mumble and she stands walking to the bed. She sits beside her, “Shhh-you’re okay.”

“Tara-no please baby please don’t leave me,” cries the redhead her eyes closed her fingers clinched. “No-don’t go!” Kennedy touches her cheek and Willow takes her hand, “Don’t please baby.” She pulls Kennedy closer-she looks down uncomfortably as she finds herself spooned into the body of the woman. Afraid to wake her she lies in her arms unmoving.

Later the door opens and Kennedy looks up to meet Tara’s eyes, “What happened?” Asks the blonde as she sits down on the bed beside her.

“Bad dreams-she was talking to you-crying. I sat on the bed and-I’m sorry-” she starts to pull away.

“No-she needed someone and you were here.”

“But you’re here now and I’m next with the question and answer session-so-” she carefully moves away and stands by the bed.

Instantly Willow’s eyes open, “No-” she sees Tara. “Baby.” She pulls her into a hug and Tara kisses her cheek.

“Bad dreams?”

“Bad-but better now.” She wraps her arms around the blonde but Tara changes their position and spoons her instead.

“I’m here-now sleep.” Tara smiles warmly at her lover.

“What did they say?” The redhead asks worried.

“We’ll talk later-sleep.”

“I told her about Angel and Glory and Buffy-” her tears fall.

“Shhh-sleep.”

“Want me to get you some more tea Red?”

“Kennedy-you’re still here,” she smiles.

“Yeah-so ah-tea?”

“Tea’s good,” she says softly.

“Be right back,” but before she can leave there is a knock at the door. She opens it- “Let me get Will some tea and then we’ll talk.”

“Of course.”

Later Kennedy is pacing around the room as Althennea talks, “Why are you here?”

“Giles said the ritual needed a third person.”

“And why did that third person have to be you?

“Because they asked me-Willow and Tara-”

“You could have said no.”

“Nah-I couldn’t. They’ve done so much for me.”

“So this is out of obligation?”

“No-” she tries to keep her anger in check. “It’s not like that.”

“What’s it like?”

Kennedy looks away and then slowly sits down. “What I say-will they know?”

“Not unless you tell them.”

“I-ah-I care about them. It’s really weird cause I’ve only known them for a little while-but it’s like they’re-” she stops her words and simply shakes her head. “I can’t explain it.”

“Please try-it could be important to the success of the ritual.”

“It’s like we’re suppose to be together,” her eye fall, “but it can’t happen. What they have is special and I won’t get in the way of that.” She stands crossing her arms against her chest.

“What makes you think you’d be in the way?”

“Could we just talk about something not this?”

“Of course dear,” the woman says and Kennedy lets her arms fall to her sides. “How long have you practiced magic?”

“I don’t.-Figured it was a bunch of fairytale crap-till I saw what it could do. Still don’t know much about it -well other than it’s trying to hurt Will and I won’t let it.”

“How do you plan on stopping it?”

“Whatever it takes,” her voice is more confident.

“Whatever?” Althennea asks with a raised eyebrow.

“That’s what I said.” Kennedy eyes fix on hers. Althennea smiles and nods.

Kennedy walks from her room through the bathroom and into the adjoining room of the witches. She smiles as she sees them asleep in each other’s arms. ‘Like it should be-’ she thinks to herself.

Twelve steps- step one admitting you have a problem-‘Definitely a problem-’ she says to herself. ‘Being in love with someone not your girlfriend-that’s a problem. If you love two people not your girlfriend does that make it a bigger problem or two problems?-Maybe it’s a twenty-four-step thing.’ She smiles for an instant but it disappears quickly. ‘Jokes aren’t gonna help. You know what step two is. Admit your problem to those you care about. Right!- No way in hell that‘s gonna happen.’ She turns and leaves the room.