California

After Buffy's meltdown a the Doublemeat Palace, I almost forgot the reason for even trying to contact her. I'm on the phone now, but it keeps ringing and ringing, not even her answering machine message is kicking on.

Finally, somebody picks up the phone, oh shit, it's Red.

"Hello? Hello? I hear breathing... FEMALE breathing! Is this a dirty phone call? Hello?"

I'm still quiet as a mouse.

"What are you wearing?" she whispers.

I hold the line for a few more seconds.

"I'm not wearing a!" !" she says in her sexy 'little girl' voice.

I hang up, not wanting to talk to her, but at least she didn't start singing this time. Not that I hadn't already left about fifty messages on B's machine. That might be why she unplugged it. I'm just lucky I've not been stabbed in the gut over it.

%%%

By now it's early December. No more drama, no worry about Tammy, no nothing. Jenny runs into the room, wide smile on her face.

"Guys! I just got off the phone with Melody! The Pussycats are gonna play a show here on December 20th! And I got us ten backstage passes! Want to invite any of your friends along?"

"Wow, the Pussycats! Does that mean I get to meet them?" Baby Bird's eyes flashed with child-like glee. It was so cute to see her this happy. Me and Tara were more reserved, but still, it was obvious how happy we were.

We spent most of the days at home after that watching the documentary movie about the Pussycats' rise to fame and listening to our P-cats CDs. Jenny was even able to talk Melody into sending an advance tape of the upcoming cartoon series. Could a comic book be far behind?

"So, whoyouryour favorite Pussy?" I ask the girls, as we're laying on the bed.

"Valerie! She's the bad girl with a heart of gold!" Fred answers, rubbing my shoulders. I laugh inside, oh, so that's why she took such a liking to me.

"Josie, because she's the leader, ya know. We all need somebody when things go wrong." Tara smiles at me, rubbing my tummy. And is that why she likes me, too?

"I like Melody, because she never got mad at me, or stopped writing, even when I was a bitch to her in my prison letters."

"You wrote to Melody, Faith?"

"Yup, sure did Baby Bird. She writes to a lot of prisoners it seems, or so says Jenny."

"Why were you mean to her?" Tara wonders. I almost don't answer her, but wor working on being nicer. All the time, I'm becoming nicer and nicer.

"It was the big house, Bunny. To hear this girl tell me to keep my head up, when I had nothing to keep my head up for, that... that pisses you off."

Tara held me in her arms, and Baby Bird was quick to rest her head on my stomach. I was totally caught off guard by her tongue slidinto mto my belly button.

"Hahaha, stilly girl." I say, patting Fred on the head.

Next day in the mail, there is a package from Melody to Jenny. It's so cool to have Melody's personal home address. I can imagine what life must be like in the Pussycats' Flat. I bet they have all day threesomes. Melody might try to act sweet and innocent, but you can get she's a little kink meister down deep.

In the package were t-shirts! Ten of them! I try my own, and it's a perfect fit. Loose enough to be comfortable, tight enough to show off my nips when I'm not wearing a bra. I suspect the same is so for my girls, so I put two shirts on our bed so they'll be waiting for them when they get back from the store.

That and I found a secret stash of FHMs and Maxims in Jenny's room. Including the issue with Kim Cattrall. My god, she's so fuckin' hot! Especially for somebody's grandma. Maybe I should start hanging out at the senior citizen's center more often.


%%%


We're late getting to the concert. I'm really pissed right now. Jenny stayed late at college at some fuckin' youth group meeting and took forever getting ready. She's wearing the same crap she always wears. What the fuck?

"We're missing Apples in Stereo right now." Baby Bird turns up the radio.

"At least you guys can hear it on the radio!"

"Jen, we could be listening to it live if you hadn't stayed after school."

"I had to stay, Faith, I'm sorry! Otherwise the youth meeting wouldn't happen tomorrow!"

"Well, just as long as we get to hear them play that song from the Powerpuff Girls soundtrack live..."

"Signal in the Sky?"

"That's the one, Bunny."

And then, wouldn't you know it?

"This next song is Signal in the Sky."

All of us let out a moan of agony at the same time.

"Gee, guys. I got you backstage passes. Isn't that enough?"

After a few more seconds of silence, Baby Bird leans over and gives Jenny a big hug, almost causing her to wreck the car.


%%%


The parking lot. Oh my, the parking lot. Remember that corny 80s video about heavy metal fans? Well, in the 21st century they should make one about the idiots who protest concerts.

I run afoul of the National Organization of Humorless Shrieking Harpies. It seems these crusaders have been out protesting every Josie concert since the tour began. All dressed like your typical woman under Taliban rule, carrying around signs that read "NO MORE ATTRACTIVE WOMEN IN SEXY OUTFITS."

I flash my tits at them. A few of them shriek angrily at me, one who seems to be the youngest is trying to hide how she's creaming in her jeans. But I know better. She's gotta remain poised and cool, not letting on she liked what she sees, or else her sisters will split her head open. But I know better. She wants me. Oh yes, she wants me. And she probably wants the Pussycats too.

The Bronze parking lot is already full and it took an effort to get in the door. We get in the door as Dressy Bessy is onstage.

Tell me what they're doin' in California...
Can we go there this summer?
I'll wear a flower in my hair
If we go there this summer
I'll walk right to that salty air

Ah yes, right on time me thinks.

It's so cute to see Bunny and Baby Bird dancing with each other on the floor. I'm sitting back with Jenny at a table, knocking back a brew I got with a fake ID. I tell Jenny it's a Pepsi, and she takes a huge fuckin' drink of the shit. Hahaha. She coughs and spits, it's so cute.

"Faith, that wasn't nice. You know I don't drink."

"Bottoms up, Jenny. It's good for you."

Bunny and Baby Bird come back looking sort of tired.

"Wow, that's a busy dance floor! Let's go again!"

"Naw, Fred. Sorry, but I need to sit it out for a while."

I take Baby Bird by the hand. "Wanna dance with me?"

Baby Bird likes to do this crazy dance thing, hand in hand. Sort of jumping up and down pogo style. Wow, what a little ball of energy. After a few minutes of this she's even making a Slayer tired.

I put a stop to this right soon. I drag little Fred back to the bathroom and have my way with her.

There are a few dozen other people in the bathroom listening to Fred as I eat her out. She has such a filthy little mouth. And to think this girl wouldn't even say 'pussy' a few months ago.

When we're back, Dressy Bessy is just finishing up their set. There is some kind of commotion on the dance floor. All I hear is somebody, who sounds like Red screaming. "EVERYBODY MUST GET STONED!"

Oh god, it is her. Fred and I laugh as she makes her way to stage, handing a handful of joints to the guitar player. Two feet from her is a policeman who puts her in cuffs.

"HATE CRIME! HOMOPHOBE!" She starts screaming. "You're only arresting me because I'm gay!"

"Come with us, how stupid can you be, kid?"

"HEY! Arrest those people there! They smoked pot with me! Most of them are straight! Bet you won't arrest them, huh? DYKE BASHER!

A group of angry looking hippies spit on Willow as she walks by. This delays the concert until enough cops can come by to arrest the whole lot of them. I wish I could be a fly on the wall tonight. This is gonna be one hellish night for Willow.

"It's not MY fault! My boyfriend, when I was still a stupid breeder... he got me hooked! I'm a victim of the Patriarch! It's all a man's fault I turned into an addict and got arrested! Damn you Oz and your stupid penis!"

By the time we get through the crowd and back to Bunny and Jenny, the band is off the stage and things are being set up for the Pussycats.

"Hey Jen, let's go backstage and meet the girls."

"Faith, they're getting ready to go on. You can't bother them now. It'll be cooler to see them after the show anyway."

"Yeah, they'll all be hot, sweaty and horny and ready to bone." I say, thrusting my hips forward. "You gonna get jiggy with Melody again, Jenny?"

"Faith! Shhhhh! Somebody might hear!"

A few clueless teens look our way. I smirk at them, especially when I see how red Jenny's face is, again.

I almost forgot to tell you. We caught Jenny and Melody Valentine having sex yesterday afternoon. Jenny is trying to play it down, but my god she fucks like a pro! And with the secret camera Fred installed in her room... well... Jenny has a beautiful ass. Not to mention a rack that nearly puts mine to shame. Fuck. It's a crime to keep those puppies covered up.

"Calm down, Jenny. You can't be all flustered when you meet your lover girl after the show."

Jenny balls her fingers into fists and grunts wordlessly for a few seconds.

"Ooooooh, the Pussycats are coming on stage!" Baby Bird squeals, nearly over the sound of applause. The four of us go for a closer look. Fuck tiredness, I'm gonna dance my ass off tonight.

So don't be fooby wby what you see,
In movies magazines and on TV,
What do they know about you and me,
We don't care what they say,
We'll be alright we'll be ok

Baby Bird is bopping around, jumping up and down, switching between me and Bunny. She's jiggling and wiggling like she's on a coke binge.

"Come on, guys! Keep up with me" She giggles and keeps up this insane dancing.

After about five songs it's too much for the rest of us, so we go sit down, leaving her on the dance floor with Jenny. Fred grabs her and twirls her around. Jenny looks like a fish out of water. Bunny and I sit back, me with another beer, her with a Pepsi.

"Oh god, look." I point to Buffy on the dance floor, sad and alone.

"Maybe you should go talk to her, sweetie. At least to tell her about Tammy." Bunny puts her hand on my shoulder.

"Do I really want to tell her?"

"Faith! If you ever loved her, you should."

"Yeah, but you know, the knife my gut..."

"Faith, if Tammy kills her and you never warned her, it'll be on your conscience forever."

"I'll risk the chance. Besides, after 50 messages on her answering machine, if she doesn't know yet, she never fuckin' will."

"Go, sweetie. You'll feel better."

Baby Bird walks up and tugs on my arm, wanting to dance some more.

"I gotta go, Fred. I'll talk to you soon, okay?"

"But the final two songs, won't you dance with me?"

Jenny and Bunny both agree to dance, I got a date with a Slayer. I feel almost cold as I walk across the floor to B. I feel numb, almost scared. What do I say?

I tape B on the shoulder.

"Faith?"

"Yeah, B. It's me. Care to dance? Or is Dead Boy #2 waiting for you?"

I put my arm around B, slow dancing with her, even if this is a fast number.

"Spike... left. He left yesterday."

"Ah, so now that Dead Boy #2 is gone, you can finally come and hang around with your friends?"

Bitter me, yes, I am. So what? Somebody has to do it. Red, Xander and Giles are too gutless to call her on her shit.

"I deserve that, Faith. I deserve it. God, I was so stupid. Those things I said in Doublemeat Palace, what was I thinking?"

"It was great sex, B. It's too powerful a draw. You know about us, that last time we went at it. Nearly had the house fall down on us."

"Well, actually, Spike and I..."

I chuckle at her. "Stupid girl."

"God, I can't believe I let things get so fucked up."

"So, does the gang know about the break up?"

"I'm avoiding everybody. I've not spoken to Willow or Xander in months. Not since Spike and I... I pretty much told them to fuck off when they said Spike was bad for me. I even let Spike beat the crap out of Giles, just for fun. Oh god, they're never gonna forgive me. I'm fucked."

Wow, B using strong language.

"That thing with Spike was so wrong!"

"Oooooh, so you're becoming a little kink meister, eh, B?"

"Spike got off on being watched. Towards the end he'd always invite his new friend Marti over. And after a while she brought her tranny lover Leigh along with her. They'd usually jerk each other off while Spike and I went at it. But the last time Leigh fucked Spike up the ass. That was two nights ago. Yesterday he left with the two of them for Los Angeles. Angel called me this morning. Leigh staked Spike after he called me a slut."

"Hey, chin up, girl."

"Everything has turned to shit, Faith. My lover is gone to Los Angeles and got staked, and now I'm stuck without any friends, not to mention I now have a stalker."

"Well, I wouldn't say NO friends." I wink at her.

"Faith, I couldn't impose on you."

Kids keep bumping into us. Goddamn slam dancers.

"Naw, B, really. I had the intent of smashing your face in next time we met, after you tried to kill me, but now... Well... We're five by five again. That is, if you can forgive me for stealing your body."

She leans her head on my shoulder, nearly crying.

"What's wrong, B?"

"Faith, do you think... maybe... just one more time... you know..."

Josie makes an announcement from the stage. "This is the last song of the night. Time for the lovers to slow dance."

"B?"

"Please, Faith. Just once. I really need to feel something again. I never felt the way I did with you with anybody else. Not even with Spike, as great as that was."

I hold B tighter, even getting a tiny bit grindy with her.

"B, I'm sorry. Really I am. But I got two girls at home who love me more than I deserve. And I love them back."

"But I could love you. C'mon, Faith. We were meant to be together. We're the Slayers. Same bloodline."

Let me be your one light
And if you'd like a true heart
Take the time to show you're mine
And I'll be a blue moon in the dark.

"B, we can't. I know you love me, and I loved you too. But right now we can only be friends."

I can feel her heart breaking as we dance. The way she holds me tighter and her tears sting my shoulder.

"If you ever want to talk, I'm here for you, B. I live in the big house on Mockingbird Lane. If you ever want to drop by, just do it."

While you sleep you'll see me there
Clouds race across the sky
Close your eyes and don't ask why
And I'll be a blue moon in your eyes.

"Faith, I always pictured us together, living in a house. Raising some kids. Two boys, two girls. Just the six of us. Our friends would be there too in houses close by. We'd all be one happy group."

Oh god, now I'm gonna start crying. Why is she laying this on me? For a split second I almost take her up on her offer, until I see Tara and Fred dancing together. The smile Tara gives me brings me back to earth.

"B, look at me. If a fuck up and criminal like me can make good with her life, I know a good girl like you can. C'mon, you're the Slayer. I know everything seems like shit now, but trust me, girl. In a little while everything's gonna be all right."

Buffy sighs and squeezes me tighter still. "I know, Faith. But you gotta promise me something."

Morning comes and sleeping's done
Birds sing outside
If demons come while you're under
I'll be a blue moon in the sky

"What's that, B?"

"Go with me when I confront the gang. God, I can't believe what I did to them, especially Giles. I wish I could go in a time machine. Undo all the Buffy stuff that Buffy did."

I have to chuckle.

"Though first I'd change the past between us."

"Shhhh, B, don't. And of course I'll go with you. I'll go with you tomorrow, in fact. Just don't drop by too early. I know what an early riser you are."

"Oh, Faith! Thank you!" She gives out a happy sigh and I know she's gonna be all right. Buffy is such a dumb kid, but I can't help but love her.

"I mean it, B. I'll spank you if you wake me up before eleven."

Let me be your one light
And if you'd like a true heart
Take the time to show you're mine
And I'll be a blue moon in the dark.

With that, the song ends and the band leaves the stage.


%%%

The backstage. Fuck me running, this is so cool. I tried to get backstage a few times back in Boston. The places there have too good security. Never bothered with the Bronze. The bands who usually play here suck ass, but it doesn't matter. I'm shootin' the shit with the Pussycats and I didn't even have to break any windows or heads to do it.

"So where's Adam M?" Baby Bird asks Josie, cluelessly.

"He's just a beard. It's all about Val and me!" Wow, seeing those two kissing nearly made me moist on the spot. Jenny and Melody are over in the corner, making out. And I'm horny again.

Buffy came back with us, but isn't doing much. She's nursing a Pepsi and making small talk with Val here and there, but she isn't in the mood for talking. She looks at me with those sad puppy dog eyes. Who knows what she's thinking though, if anything. This is Buffy.

I notice B, Josie and Val making there way to a backroom. Damn, the old girl has her groove back. And here I just thought they were gonna talk.

I ca hear Jenny trying to keep her voice down, but about to come. Melody's fingers are obviously sliding in and out of Jenny's soaked cunt. Then I notice there are no kids around, not many people around but us. I love it, the Pussycats are really NC-17 underneath it all.

The ambient noise around me blurs into one long hollow drone. What's going on? I can feel my right leg, it feels broken. A horrible pain shoots through me as I'm waking up.

Was that all a dream?

I look down at my shirt, noticing three signatures on it.

No, guess not. What the fuck happened? And what's that noise?

I'm in the back of Jenny's car and the horn keeps blasting. I reach up, shaking Jenny's shoulder.

"Mind laying off the horn, Jen?"

I shake her again, nothing.

It's then that I notice a huge car, some kind of Hummer, or whatever they're called shining its headlights at us.

Jenny's head is resting against the horn.

"Dammit, Jenny. How can you fall asleep over all this noise?"

I shake her again.

"Jenny?"

I'm careful to move her head, then notice how loose it is.

"Oh fuck!"

Her head snaps back, then forward again. Her neck, it's broken. The lights go out for a few seconds, and I notice that the dashboard is wet.

When the lights shine back, I see they're covered in blood and the windshield is shattered.

"Fred..." I hear a voice behind me say. It's Bunny.

"Faith, where is Fred?"

"What the fuck happened, Bunny? Where the fuck are we?"

"Fred... through the windshield. Hurry..."

"What happened?"

"Car... crash. Go, get Fred."

"Bunny, I can't leave you behind too."

"Faith, my... I cut myself on the belt."

God knows Jenny would buy one of those environmentally safe cars. You just know there had to be a catch. Whoever heard of somebody cutting themselves on a belt?

"Go, Faith. Fred is hurt. I can feel it."

"What happened, Bunny? Show me what happened."

She moves her hand and her intestines start to spill out. I grab them and push them back into her stomach.

"It's okay, they can sew you up at the hospital. Just don't let them fall out."

"FRED! Fred is hurt. Faith, go get her!"

"I have to bring you with me!"

"No! Faith! It's too late for me."

"It's never too late, goddammit! I'm not leaving you, or Fred. Or Jenny."

"Is Jenny all right?"

I shake my head. "Her neck broke. Who the fuck hit us anyway?"

"That car..." Bunny points at the Hummer that is shining its light at us again. Bunny is frozen in her, not saying anything. I feel for the pulse on her neck and feel nothing.

I hobble out into the night. I'm not sure what time it is, but I know it's late. There is no other traffic. I grab Jenny's purse on my way to Baby Bird. My leg doesn't feel so bad, then when I step in a hole the pain returns. Gotta find Jenny's cell.

Fred is lying on the pavement, twitching and moaning, covered in blood. I try to scoop her up in my arms, but some of her flesh falls off her forearms, causing her to squeal in agony.

"Baby Bird, hold on, you'll be all right." I lie, of course I lie. Like I'm gonna tell her she's dying? She's too smart to buy into my lies, I can't make out what she's saying, but I know in there was an "I love you."

"Goddammit, I'm calling 911. You're gonna make it, Baby Bird, you're gonna make it."

I thought the Hummer was abandoned, probably the driver in bad shape too. Who knows, but then I notice a shadow moving around in the front seat.

"You sit still, I'll be right back."

I walk up to the car, then the driver's side door opens and somebody gets out.

"Who the fuck are you? You just gonna let us all die? You fucking asshole, talk to me!"

"Ah, Faith. So it's you."

"Tell me who the fuck you are. Why did you do this to us?"

My leg is dragging on the pavement as I walk towards her.

"Stay back!"

I hear a gun cock.

"Who do you think I am, Faith?"

I see her face in the moonlight. Oh Christ, it's Tammy.

"No! Fuck!" I scream.

"You didn't really think you'd get away from me, did you?"

"You fucking bitch!"

I feel my cheek almost break as she slams the handle of the gun against my face. I'm down now, crawling towards Baby Bird.

"Don't kill her!"

"And why shouldn't I?"

She stops in her tracks. I'm able to run to Baby, one legged all the way. I'm holding her again, stroking her face.

"Faith, get out of here," she barely whispers to me. I hold her tight to me.

"Baby Bird, don't..."

But before I can finish the sentence I hear the gun go off, sounds like a fuckin' cannon. Fred's head explodes all over my shirt.

"FUCK!" I scream, looking down at the headless corpse of my lover.

"What the fuck do you want from me?"

"After all I did for you, Faith, you go and get a good life on me. You could have stayed back in the prison, made up for the wrong you did, but no, you had to go get some whores for you, then I saw you, you were dancing with HER."

"What?"

"Nobody ever gets away from me."

She slams the gun handle up against my head again, nearly knocking me out cold.

"Suck it, bitch. Suck it like you would a cock."

She sticks the barrel of the .357 Magnum in my mouth.

"Suck it like the whore you are."

I look up in her eyes. The tenderness I once knew was no longer there. Only hate and anger stair down at me. She doesn't shake or anything as she towers above me. Worst of all, she's looking me right in the eyes.

Everything I love has been taken from me. Any other time I would fight, but tears stream down my face as I think about my lost lovers and the wonderful past few months. Now the only thing I can think of is how the barrel of the gun tastes kind of sweet and tangy. It taste just like... oh fuck... B.

The End