Devil's In The Details

“Never once in 8 years did I ever think that you loved me.” Xander said as he burst into Buffy’s room.
“What?” She said as she turned to face him.
“I’ve been in love with you since the day that I met and you weren’t and I can’t help but think that’s a bad thing.”
“It’s not bad Xander.” Buffy said as she stood up and looked at him. She ran her hand slowly across his cheek. She took a moment and just looked at him, Xander wanted to speak but he couldn’t think of anything.
“I don’t want us to be like this, you’re right, I didn’t love you, but do you really think that we’d be here if I did? Or would Angel be here asking me if I still thought about the guy who stopped all over my heart?”
“I can’t help but think that I don’t deserve you.”
“What about me? Don’t you think that I worry that one day you’re going to wake up and figure out that I’ve ruined every relationship I’ve ever been in? That it’ll hit you that you’re the greatest guy I ever met and that every moment you’re with me you’re in danger. I’m just sitting here waiting for that moment when you realize that that I’m just not worth the risk?” Buffy said finally finishing her tirade, Buffy was in full freak out mode right and it was Xander’s turn to calm her down.
“We are both incredibly screwed up.” Xander said simply. She smiled up at him and kissed him.
“Of course we are, that’s what makes up so perfect for each other.” Buffy said and she put her head on his chest and just enjoyed for the moment that he was hers and that she was his. Buffy went to kiss him again and the kiss became deeper than she expected. Her body hungered for him so deeply that she tried to hold back but she couldn’t. His hands searched her back and she wanted him to keep touching her for just a few more seconds. Xander lips trailed kisses down her neck as she grazed his back with her nails. Buffy felt his hands slide under her shirt so now he was touching the flesh of her back. Then Xander saw Dawn walking, he saw her sliver as she crossed the door frame, but and she was gone. She never made it to the door. Xander knew it was time to go.
“I have to go.” Xander said and Buffy pouted.
“ I was hoping you could stay for a bit, so we could talk.”
“Don’t worry, I’ll be back.” It wasn’t long now, he could feel it he kissed her forehead and stalked down the hallway.
Willow quietly walked out of Buffy’s bathroom.
“He’s hiding something.” Buffy said and Willow nodded his head.
“Why don’t I try this time,” Willow said and Buffy nodded her head.
“I’ll go find Giles and see if we can test his blood or something to find out what’s wrong with him.”
“All right,” Willow said, both Buffy and Willow left the room, Willow headed towards Xander and Buffy headed the opposite direction towards Giles private quarters.
Buffy walked into his quarters and she saw his window open as the sun began to set.
Something was wrong with the sun; it was red, deep red, as it slowly descended in the sky. She saw his papers scattered everywhere the wind blew them around her. She could feel it now, there was something wrong. Buffy looked down to the ground below the window, someone was lying on the ground, and she couldn’t bring her self to see it.
It was like it was outside of her mind, she couldn’t see the broken figure below, that made out a shape so much like Giles’ that it made her scream inside. She found that she just couldn’t move, she felt her feet, her legs, she knew that they were held fastly underneath her but she couldn’t move. She just kept staring down at the shape below her.
It burned inside her this feeling of something was wrong, she couldn’t handle losing anyone else; she knew that, all that she had lost was almost too much to bear sometimes. So that’s how she knew it wasn’t happening. Because if she lost him she knew that she would have lost too much. She felt a hand on her shoulder. She wanted to move but still she was unable.
“It’s always such a tragedy to lose one’s father, I think it’s the worst pain I ever felt when I lost mine.” She heard whispering in her ears, she physically tried to move but she couldn’t.
“Of course it was a little different for me, my father was the creator himself, and I lost him when he chose your kind over mine.” She heard, she knew that voice, it sounded so familiar it echoed in her brain but she didn’t know from where.
“I think I’ve honestly done you a favor, one day he would turn away from you just like mine did. This is I think one of the first nice things I’ve ever actually done. I knew that my passion for killing would help someone someday.” Buffy turned, she looked and there was Miss Calendar, the love of Giles’ life and his murderer. It wasn’t actually her; she said to herself, it was the The First.
“I know what you’re thinking how I could have killed him, I can’t touch anything, I’m just The Taunter. But I’ve got some new friends in high places, and they have given me just enough power to even out the score a little. Angel apparently took a lot from them, and they would like to take a little back.” Miss Calendar smiled and ran her fingers along Buffy’s cheek as the tears fell from Buffy’s face.
“I’m going to kill you all.” Buffy whispered, and Miss Calendar smiled.
“I’m sure you will dear, but not before I kill everything you love.” She told her and she placed her hand on Buffy shoulder and with the force of a Mack truck pushed Buffy out the window sending Buffy flying end over end eventually crashing into the pavement below. Buffy’s eyes began to pass out after she hit the concrete below but she knew she wasn’t going to die. But as everything began to go dark she swore that she heard Miss Calendar laughing above her.
“I don’t like lying to them,” Xander told Wesley and Wesley sighed and looked at the young man.
“I told you that you would have break from your friends, that you would have to lie to them for this to work, this is the only way that you can protect them.” Wesley explained for the thousandth time.
“That’s easy for you to say you have much less to lose than I do.” Xander reminded him and Wesley’s face turned stoic.
“I have as much to lose as you, but I know that the risks are worth what we have to gain.”
“I just don’t understand why we can’t tell them.”
“Because if they know then those that are after us will know as well,”
“They already don’t trust you Wesley.”
“Yes, but they trust you implicitly, you’re half makes up for the lack of mine.”
“Whatever you say chief,”
“You have to risk everybody if you are going to save anybody.”
“How very zen.” Xander said sarcastically and Wesley caught his fist as it flew at the punching bag.
“Remember Xander, you came to me, you said that you owed Angel and I’m calling in that favor. I won’t let this be how it all ends. I won’t let what’s happened be the way that we win. I won’t let this be my life!” Wesley told him, his face was angry and severe. Xander had never seen him like that before.
At that moment Xander knew that the only way that he would have to stop Wesley if he needed to be to kill him. Xander thought to himself, if I have to, I will.
“Get out.” Xander said and he motioned to tell Wesley that someone was coming down the stairs. Wesley disappeared right before his eyes. Willow slowly walked down the stairs and smiled.
“Hey buddy,” she said as she reached the bottom of the steps.
“What do you want Willow?”
“Can’t a girl come down and see her BF for some nice interrogation?”
Xander smiled and untapped his wrists.
“Always,” Xander said as he moved towards the free weights, he threw the tape in the trash and pulled the 300 lbs. from the table and walked towards the uneven bars.
“Don’t you want to take a break?” Willow said as he put the weights down in front of him. He turned and faced Willow.
“Hey kid, wanna see a trick?” Xander whispered deviously and he flipped himself into the air and landed perfectly on the lower of the two uneven bars. He smiled down at her.
“Impressive, and in no way screams that you’re slightly mad with power.”
Xander frowned at her and picked up the two free weights underneath him and began to up and out against his chest.
“Come on Will, can’t a guy have a little fun with his new found super powers?”
“Xander are you going to tell me what’s going on?”
“If you mean about me and Buffy I’m pretty sure it’s as confusing on the outside as it is on the inside all I know is that we love each other were trying to work it out.”
“Xander, I just hope that you realize that what Buffy wants is someone who’s honest with her.”
“Oh, yea, because she’s never kept a secret in her life,”
“Come on that’s not fair.”
“You’re right it’s not fair, but it’s honest.”
“I’m sure I like new and improved Xander, he’s a little judgmental for my taste.”
“I’m afraid that both new Xander and old Xander were judgmental but new Xander doesn’t pretend like he isn’t.”
Xander dropped the weight to the floor and they crashed with a loud thud. It took Willow for a moment, she swore it was only from moment and suddenly he was right next to her.
“Why? I am finally not in Buffy’s shadow anymore? I’m my own superhero, and that bugs people doesn’t it?” As Xander spoke inside he rolled his eyes, he didn’t believe any of this crap. He loved Buffy, not Buffy the superhero, because he knew the Buffy he wanted was the person who did great things because people needed help, whether she had superpowers or not. But he had to wind Willow up, get her confused, worried, because if he didn’t his plan would never work, and needed it to work. Willow’s power began to rise inside of her, he could feel it she wouldn’t lose control though he knew that not until she knew the truth.