Remember Me

It was a semi-quiet day at home. Buffy sat at the small desk in the living room, reading her British Literature assignment and every so often asking Spike a question over her shoulder. Angel sat on the armchair, sifting through the mail and Spike sat on the couch, laptop in front of him, working on his book.

The breeze blew in through the open windows, tickling Buffy's shoulders and feet and she sat back and sighed, closing her eyes. She could hear the tap-tap of the laptop keys and the sound of papers shuffling and Angel grumbling. She smiled. So content was she. The shrill sound of the phone came a second later, interrupting their peaceful interlude.

"That's Mrs. Richard calling back," Buffy told Angel as she sat upright and grabbed her book, setting it in her lap.

The phone continued to wring as Spike and Angel stopped what they were doing and stared at her. "Aren't you going to get it?" She asked, not even bothering to turn around.

Shaking his head in wonder, Angel reached for the phone. "Hello? Uh, yeah...hi, Mrs. Richard." And he walked out of the room to talk to his client.

Buffy shrugged and continued her work.

"Gotta stop doing that, pet," Spike told her as he kneeled down next to her.

She looked over at him, placing her book down. "What do you mean?"

"The magic. It's good for when you're patrolling and fighting vamps, but it's going to burn you out if you keep abusing it."

"I'm not abusing anything, Spike. I'm not even DOING anything. Ever since Angel and I started meditating and developing my magic, this stuff?...this extra stuff, like knowing whose on the phone-just comes out of me. I don't use it. It just happens. I can't stop it."

Spike stood, running a hand through his gelled locks. "I don't like it. It worries me."

Buffy sighed, "because magic always makes you worry."

"Because there's always consequences to it, Buffy!"

"What do you want me to do? I can't stop it, I can't shut it off. These powers are just inside me, Spike. I've just never brought them forward. Oh, I brought some forth, but I never knew I had all this inside me." She stood now, facing him as she defended herself.

"You like it."

"I like that it keeps you, Angel, and myself safe. Do I like that it just makes me even more of a freak? No."

"Not a freak," Spike said softly, reaching out and caressing the side of her face.

"Thanks," she smiled weakly. Then sighing, "besides, it's just one more step in figuring out all that I am."

Spike frowned, "I know all that you are."

Buffy rolled her eyes, "it's not the same Spike. It's important that I know me."

"What have you learned so far?"

"I hate math."

Spike laughed, "that it?"

She laughed back, "for now."

"Keep on that introspection then, luv."

She grinned, "besides, I'm like caller ID."

Spike shook his head, groaning at her joke.

"Can I have a hug now?" She asked, jutting out her lower lip, knowing full well Spike was powerless to the pout. He reached for her and brought her into his arms, and Buffy smiled giddily.

"You can have more than a hug, girl," he purred and nipped at her lips. She nipped back before they settled into a kiss.

"I just worry about you, kitten. Don't want anything to ever hurt my girl."

Buffy nodded, "I know, Spike." She leaned into him, pressing her face into his shirt and sniffing the mix of dryer sheets, alcohol and smoke. All Spike. All hers.


"Spike's worried about me," Buffy told Angel later as she sat, ramrod straight in the middle of the floor of Angel's old loft above the gallery. Soon after Faith and Wesley had left town, they decided that this would be a perfect place to train. There was more than enough room to set up equipment and better yet, no one but them had access to it.

She had trained with both vampires and when Angel requested it was time to meditate, Spike had gone home, giving Buffy a pointed look.

"Why?" Angel asked, distractedly, as he fiddled with the stereo system, putting on a soothing CD in which to meditate to.

"He thinks I'm going to burn myself out with all the magic."

Angel turned around, frowning. "But you don't use it unless we're working on something."

"I know, but with the phone thing today..."

Angel nodded, finally understanding. "Ah, yes. That. Well, I can't say that it was a little disconcerting. How did you do that?"

Buffy shrugged. "I don't know. I didn't do anything. I was just sitting there, enjoying the moment when the phone rang. It popped into my head who it was and I told you,"

"Well, I have noticed a difference in your abilities since we started meditating."

"Me too," Buffy nodded. "Do you think that Spike's worries are justified? Do you think that one day my enhanced abilities are going to go wonky on me?"

Angel sat across from her, barefoot, shirt undone and relaxed. "Do you feel any different?"

She shook her head, "no, not really."

"Define not really."

"I feel the same except more in touch with everything...connected somehow."

"That makes sense. When you practice magic, you're working with natural energies, and when you're meditating as we have been, you are connecting yourself to the Earth. It makes sense that you would feel more connected to the natural energies around you."

"Yeah, and it doesn't feel bad. It feels nice."

"Then there are no worries," Angel smiled.

Buffy smiled back. "Okay then."

"Kiss before we start?"

"Of course!" Buffy leaned in kissed Angel sweetly before sitting back down. She closed her eyes, entwined her fingers with Angel and began to concentrate on her breathing.

The meditation was the same every time. Angel had taught it to her in the beginning of their lessons. She would relax her body by taking deep breaths, then she would imagine she had roots at the bottom of her feet that she would send out into the Earth, and then imagine herself as kind of like a tree, with branches elongating from the top of her head and out of her arms and then eventually descending back to the Earth. Then, she'd pull in the energies of the Earth and Sky into her body and keep them there, contained in her body as she let her mind take her where she needed to go. Sometimes, she would be in a place she called her 'happy place'. It was a simple, quiet, meadow with a stream complete with a waterfall that she would use to recharge her batteries after a long, stressful day or night. Or, sometimes her mind would just be at ease and all she concentrated on was her breathing. Angel was always there with her to pull her back in when the time was right. That was the point when she'd release those energies back into the Earth. Always, at the end, she felt rested, recharged and at peace.

Today she found herself in her quiet little meadow. The sun was beating down upon her, but it wasn't too hot nor too cold. It was just right. The grass was thick and lush and tickled her feet as she strolled to her private stream. She dipped her feet in the clear water and listened to the rush of the waterfall as she inhaled the sweet fragrance of the white orchids that sporadically adorned the place. She heard birds chirp above her and she smiled up at them as she waded on. She squatted in the cool stream and stared at her reflection. She poked at it and watched as her form rippled in the water.

Then she felt them. Strong arms grabbing her, pulling her out of the stream, invading her 'happy place'. The arms were adorned in black, the material chaffing her skin. No sound could be heard save for the birds and the waterfall as large hands slammed upon her mouth, silencing her. Panicked, Buffy's eyes snapped open. Her heart was racing, she was sweating and she started to pant.

Angel came into focus, concern all over his face as he brought her closer and onto his lap. "What happened, Buffy?"

"Something's coming."

"What do you mean?" He pressed, cradling her face in his hands and staring at her imploringly.

"I was in my happy place and there were these arms in black-they grabbed me. Grabbed me out of the stream, they were pulling me out of it."

"Then what?"

"I got scared and opened my eyes."

"Spike worried you. Now wasn't the time to-"

"No, Angel. I feel it. In here," she placed her hand on her gut. "Something's coming."


Chapter Two


"What do you think it is?"

"I don't know!" Buffy exclaimed and scrambled to her feet.

"Buffy, relax-"

"It was my happy place, Angel. Something, no, a bunch of SOMEONE'S were in MY happy place. Not exactly sacred any longer now is it?"

"That's not true."

Buffy narrowed her eyes, "what do you mean?"

"I mean, it was your intuition kicking in. It's trying to tell you that something is going to happen-or come-as you said and it's warning you."

"I know what intuition is, Angel. I just don't really appreciate it happens in the one place that I know I'm utterly and completely safe."

Now Angel looked hurt. "You don't feel that way with me and Spike?"

"No, Angel, it's not that at all," Buffy explained. "It's just that the whole point of my happy place is that it's all mine. I love you and Spike; you know that. I KNOW you know that. It's just that it's my own little escape. Kind of like when you hang out at the beach at night? Or when Spike...goes to the bar. That doesn't sound right."

Angel chuckled, "I get it, sweetheart. Just had a moment."

"So, the whole point of what I'm saying is that it's rather disturbing that my escape just got invaded, when the whole point is to be able to go there, not be disturbed and be SAFE."

"So, would you be averse to having me join you so we could find out what grabbed you?"

"I don't know. I just got 'attacked' and I'm not exactly in the mood to go back right now."

"Makes sense, but maybe tomorrow night we could give it another go. We can't let this go, Buffy. We have to find out what it is that's coming and find out how to fight it."

"Of course, and I'm all on board for being prepared. Now I just want to go home, and...ooohhh...take a bath. With bubbles. Lots of bubbles. Have you ever taken a bubble bath before Angel?"

Angel smirked as he shut the CD off. "Is that an invitation?"

Buffy laughed, "could be. All depends."

Angel grinned, "on what?"

"On if you have any cash on you to buy the bubble bath because I'm all out," she smiled brightly and Angel began to laugh.


The first thing Buffy had to do when she got home was tell Spike about what happened during her meditation. Buffy had learned a long time ago that keeping things from anyone, especially her two vampires was a BAD idea. However, Buffy knew of a way to soften the outburst of 'I told you so' and 'no more magic': She would tell him as she undressed him for their bath.

"What is this all about?" Spike asked with a smile on his face and in his voice as she launched herself on him once her and Angel arrived home. Angel told her he was going to start the water and retreated to the bathroom.

She smiled as she straddled him where he lay on the couch. She smiled at him mischievously. "Bubble bath," and she undid his belt, whipping it out of the belt loops and snapping it on the floor for added measure. She giggled though, at her attempts to be a wanton sex goddess and placed a tiny kiss on Spike's amused smirk.

"How was the meditation?" He murmured as he brought her in the circle of his arms and pulled her closer, inching his hands up the back of her shirt to take it off.

"Good," she said lightly and as she tossed her shirt across the room, she reached behind her to unclasp her bra. "Although, something did happen."

"What?"

"Someone, or a bunch of someone's rather, attacked me in my happy place," and she unclasped her bra, her breasts springing free. Spike was momentarily distracted, but only momentarily.

"What? You were attacked in your meadow?" His eyes left her breasts and went straight to her face.

She nodded and leaned into him, softly kissing him. "Angel said it was my intuition warning me. Something's coming."

Now she pulled back and splayed her hands under his shirt, lifting it and then divesting him of his shirt. She ran her hands up his bare chest, grazing his nipples with her fingers. He grabbed her wrists, stopping her.

"Buffy. Nice try, trying to distract me. Tell me what's going on luv."

Buffy sighed, "I didn't want you to worry."

"And by undressing me and yourself, you'd thought I'd worry less?"

"Well, no, I was just hoping that it would make the nutty you would pitch a little less."

"That's not fair."

She raised an eyebrow. "Not fair? Do I need to remind you of the time you tried to seduce me after you ate all my chocolates?"

"Entirely different."

"How?"

"Your life wasn't in danger."

"No, but yours was."

Spike gave her a look. "Buffy."

"Spike," and she gave him 'the look' back. "My life isn't in danger. We don't know that...yet."

"Yet. Sounds promising. What happened exactly?"

Buffy sighed and sat back, still straddling him. "I was in my happy place and someone with a black, scratchy, long-sleeved shirt grabbed me and put their hand over my mouth. I got the feeling that there was more than one though, and that something was coming. I stopped my meditation and told Angel all about it. We're going to figure it all out."

Spike raised an eyebrow and crossed his arms. "Do I get to help figure it all out too?"

"Of course! I just know how you hate magic."

"I'll deal with it if it means you'll be safe."

She nodded and placed her hands on his fly, "can we commence with the undressing now? I think the water is ready because I don't hear it anymore."

Spike nodded and grinned as Buffy undid the button and fly of his pants. She looked at them skeptically.

"What?" Spike asked, a slight urgency to his voice.

"There's something to be said about tight jeans like these."

"Oh?" Spike murmured and leaned in, kissing her softly. "What's that?"

"They're like a cheap motel. No ballroom."

Spike fell back against the couch, shaking with laughter.


Buffy's eyes slowly opened as she realized that Angel was no longer in bed with them. He used to do that all the time, get up in the middle of the night and watch TV or read. Angel had always been restless. Spike used to say he had to get an early start on all his brooding. Buffy just knew that Angel always had something swirling around in his mind. Whether it was something to benefit the gallery or a fight move to better employ, Angel was always thinking ahead.

When the three of them had gotten together, however, Angel had stopped getting up in the middle of the night so much. He slept better, his mind at ease. Now his mind was ill at ease again. Quietly, Buffy made her way out of their bed and padded into the living room. No Angel. She heard his voice though. He was outside on his cell. He didn't have a shirt on, but he had his pants on and he was facing away from the door. She smiled at the chuckle he let out. Making her way outside, he turned to see her standing there and looked at her in question. She didn't answer him but rather slipped her arms around him, snuggling into him. She felt a strong arm encircle her and smiled.

"Yes, okay. Thanks Giles. Good night." He clicked his phone shut and tossed it on a nearby lounger, wrapping both arms around her. "Why are you up, Princess? Did I wake you?"

"Nope. Well, when I realized you weren't in bed anymore. You finally got in touch with Rupert Giles?"

"Yeah, I couldn't sleep. I was-"

"Thinking."

"Yeah, thinking."

"Care to share?"

"I had some questions about what happened to you and what we could do about it. He gave me some advice."

"And? Considering this does have to do with me, I think I should know."

"Well," he began, sitting down on a patio chair and pulling her down on his lap, "I told him what happened and if it were in fact possible that I join you to see what was there that was harming you. And it is, as long as I have your consent."

"What about the fact that in my happy place it's sunlight? Couldn't that burn you?"

"Not as long as you didn't want it to."

"I didn't want those guys in my happy place but they showed up, how can we be sure that you won't get burned?"

"Those 'guys' were unexpected. They were part of your intuition, an inside source that has nothing to do with your happy place. It's your meadow, so therefore, you do control what can happen in there."

"What do you mean an inside source? I mean, if some inside source is invading my mind, then certainly it can cause harm."

"The inside source is your subconscious mind. That is the inside source."

"My subconscious produced these scary men?"

"Your subconscious mind gathers information before your conscious mind is aware of it. That's the whole idea behind intuition. You get these feelings and thoughts about things because your subconscious is already aware of it. The fact that you know something is all part of your subconscious mind already clued into it. What is actually going to happen and who they are?that might be too advanced for you. That's usually reserved for the ESP inclined."

"So I can't actually get answers from them."

"No. You can face them and be safe from the threat they pose, but you might not get answers out of them. Being threatened as you were is because..."Angel's voice trailed off and he buried his face in her shoulder.

"What Angel? Tell me."

"Because whatever is coming IS threatening."

"Don't worry Angel. We'll face it, all of us, together."

"Giles, he said that I would be safe where you are because it's not your intent to hurt me. The sun wouldn't hurt me as long as you didn't want it too. Those men wouldn't hurt you as long as you didn't want them to."

"So what you're saying is, you can come with me into my happy place and see these men, but I might not get any answers. And, I bet that if I'm not getting any answers, neither are you. You'll be safe while you're there, but really, what is the point of you being there if you're not going to be able to do anything to help me?"

"You said they grabbed you right? That you couldn't see them, correct?"

"Right. Course, I was a little freaked out so I didn't turn around and take a look."

"Well, there you go. I'll be able to see when they grab you, advance upon you, whatever. I'll be able to see them. Even if you do this time, two sets of eyes are better than one. I can do research, find out about some demons or vampires that could be coming."

"And you're certain you'll be safe there?"

"It's a place you half-created in your mind, Buffy. Would you hurt me given the chance?"

"Never."

"Then I'll be safe."

"Wait, what do you mean I half created it?"

"This place, it does exist. On some astral, magical plane it exists and it was all for you."

"Kind of like you and Spike. All for me."

Angel chuckled, "exactly."

"Do you know how it's done? How to get there with me?"

"Easy. You're going to be my guide. We'll blend our energies together and you'll take me with you."

"Sounds easy enough."

"You're scared."

"Nervous. Uneasy. Wouldn't say scared. What if I can't do it?"

"If at first you don't succeed-"

"Try, try again."

"See? We're so connected, it's like we share one mind."

"Frightening."

"I happen to love your mind."

"I meant for me," she teased.

"Brat."