Needed

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters or the setting of the story. All things I borrowed from the Buffyverse are a creation of and belong to Joss Whedon.


Timeline: more than 9years after NFA ("Angel"), 10 after "Chosen" (BtVS)

Beta: Rachael

A special thanks to Sebrina, who helped me get the chapter going with some inspired bit of RPing.

Chapter 14

Wesley kept her pasted to the wall, not allowing her to move except for the minimal assistance necessary in the smooth removal of her clothes. He was now on his knees in front of her, still holding the last piece of clothing he had taken off. He looked at the sock in his right hand, somehow regretting he had to let it drop to the floor. He held her ankle in his left hand, unwilling to let her foot down. He felt the shiver run through Faith as he ran his fingers along her calf. For some strange reason he couldn't bring himself to look up at her. His beautiful, naked, eager goddess.

She ran her fingers through his hair. There was a feel of inevitability to the touch. Any second now, she was going to make him look at her. She was going to say something, anything would do, and he would have to look up. If he looked up, she wouldn't be there, because this couldn't be real. Nothing that felt like this could be real. If he looked up, she would vanish, leaving him clutching at thin air.

"Oh, God, Wes," she whispered.

There it was, her voice, throaty, needing him, wanting him. Like pouring gasoline on a roaring fire. When he led her foot toward the floor his nails dug into her ankle, causing her to let out a soft yelp and clutch at his hair. He lowered his head, relishing the pain as his hair was pulled out of her fists. He bowed his head lower, all the way to the ground to kiss the half moon marks he had left on her skin.

'This isn't me. This isn't me! THIS ISN'T ME!' he wanted to scream. He didn't. It felt too bloody right to spoil. Even for the sake of the almighty truth.

He started to kiss his way up her leg. He still couldn't look up. He kissed his way up blindly, waiting for her touch, waiting to be high enough so her fingers would touch his head again.

"Mm, Wes..." she said, almost purring

"Christ, this has got to be real," he whispered, pressing a side of his face into her belly while her hands were roaming through his hair and along the back of his neck. He ran his hands along her sides, not daring to venture again over her breasts.

When she moaned his name, her body seemed to vibrate, calling for him. He was so tempted to nudge her legs further apart to taste her before opening his eyes. He knew that he could make the fantasy last longer if he just didn't try to see her eyes.

He looked up at her. She was still there, her eyes, mercifully closed, her mouth forming his name, in so soft a whisper he could barely hear it. She wanted him. She wanted more. He wanted more.

He stood up abruptly, pressing his body into hers. She gasped wrapping her arms around him instinctively. It felt oddly right to be fully clothed, while she was naked, and all the more vulnerable for it, her soft skin finding only coarse fabric, making her relish even more the feel of his hands, smooth by comparison.

Her fingers were playing with the hair at the back of his head, and she started to nuzzle into his neck. Her lips felt soft and warm against his skin. She hadn't chosen the scarred side of his neck. His brain managed to work out that she probably didn't want him to see her as a copycat of Lilah's. Wolfram and Hart had tremendous details in their files. Faith must have studied them enough in the years he had been out of her life. He growled uncontrollably when she found a particularly sensitive spot on his neck.

"Please," she whispered.

It was so tempting to undo his trousers freeing himself just enough to take her like that, against the wall.

"Please."

He suddenly needed to see the want in her eyes. Eyes. Windows to the soul. The soul. Spike!

"She's a part of me. I can feel almost everything she feels. It doesn't work all that well the other way round, but it still made us conduct out 'recreational activities' as far from one another as possible."

The memory of Spike's words startled him to some degree of lucidity.

He pulled her head roughly away from his neck. God, how he loved having her silky hair in his fist! He almost lost it again when she looked at him through heavy lidded eyes. Eager? Frustrated? Desperate for release? He hoped she was, because he was teetering on the edge of it all.

He had to focus on her eyes, to get the words out. The sharp pain and the momentary decrease in the intensity of his touches were probably drawing her out of the lust haze.

"Spike, can probably feel this even if he were in Alaska! I can whip up a barrier to shield us. Temporarily. I'm pretty far gone not to care, but if you want privacy, I'll try to do something about your connection."

He couldn't believe he had managed to get all the words out. He braced himself against the urge to lower his mouth to her breasts. She needed a little respite to make her choice and answer him.

"Privacy," she said.

He grinned with mingled approval and frustration at her choice. Frustration for postponing their release. Approval because the barrier would give them the leisure to explore each other thoroughly. Before he left. Not a good time to think about that.

He threaded his fingers through her hair, looking in her eyes, unwilling to tear himself from her, but at least trying not to go any further. Despite himself, Wesley drew his head nearer to her, until their lips were almost touching again.

"You should call his cell. If I'm successful, he's going to worry when he doesn't feel you," he gritted his teeth a little when he said that, hating to admit the existence of such a powerful bond between Faith and her vampire. "We wouldn't want him to hurry home to see what happened, would we?"

Faith moved her head the half inch that still separated them. He didn't find the strength to break the kiss again. She had to push him away a few minutes later.

"The barrier. Please," she said, panting.

"Wicked girl," Wesley said, but he disentangled himself from her embrace, not before running his fingers briefly across her inner thigh.

Faith startled, letting out a soft whimper that made him smile satisfied. Wesley went to the bed to get a sheet to drape around her. He couldn't leave the room with the image of her naked body, flushed with desire. He hurried out, but before he closed the door behind him, he turned around.

"I shouldn't be too long, but if I'm not back in a few minutes, don't start without me."

He felt the door yanked out of his hand, and found himself again in Faith's arms. She kissed him fiercely before pushing him away and slamming the door shut.

"Hurry up!" she told him through the closed door.

Wesley made his way into the office in a daze. He was sexually aroused, but this fact in itself was not unprecedented. It was Faith's reactions, the intensity of her desire that were bewildering. He wondered briefly what her conversation with Spike might sound like. From what the vampire had said, they had never had to deal with this sort of situation, so presumably they didn't have a code phrase for it.

He laughed when he saw his hands were trembling as he took some books off the shelves. He flipped through the pages as fast as his blurred vision allowed. Wesley found it highly amusing that he was forced into an intellectual activity while his blood was now routed away from his brain. He was opening a second book when Faith came in the office, still wrapped in the white sheet.

"He said he nearly drove the car into a ditch when we started," she answered Wesley's raised eyebrow.

"Hmm," he said, returning his eyes to the book, faking disinterest. "When do you think that was?" he asked.

"Oh, I'd think around the time you first kissed me, tore off my shirt and started playing with my breasts," she said, matching his tone in fake indifference while she perched herself casually on the desk, next to the book.

The letters were doing a mad jig on the page in front of him, but he refused to show her the full measure of the effect her words were having on him.

"What else did he say?" he asked, without looking away from his book while groping absentmindedly for a corner of the sheet and tugging at it once he found it.

"Umm, he said... that... you should... either... hurry up... with the barrier... or get... the job... done... sooon."

Wesley kept his fingers busy on and between her legs, and his face straight all along Faith's broken recounting of her conversation with Spike. She could barely get the words out, but never drew away from his touch or asked him to stop. His caresses had been feather light over her knees, her thighs, then they had gotten more and more daring with every hitched breath she let out. He had just taken his hand away when she had moaned the last word, sooon.

"And do you concur with that?" he asked, amazed of his ability to keep up the appearance of iron self control when he was at breaking point.

"You, bastard," Faith said.

She stood up and wrapped the sheet tighter around her body.

"Give me a damn book!" she demanded.

He gave her one of the manuscripts he had not yet looked through, carefully not looking at her, well aware of the danger that rested in catching more than a glimpse of the sheet.

"Got it!" he exclaimed ten minutes and two books later.

Wesley jumped to his feet and went, book in hand, to the cabinet where they kept most of the magical ingredients.

Faith joined him next to the cabinet, the warmth of her body seeping into him, causing the man to close his eyes in an attempt to steady himself.

"Here, I'll hold the book," she offered.

"Bloody hell," he muttered when he noticed the sheet falling off her shoulder as she reached to take the book from him.

He took another look at the page and started to take the necessary spell components doing his best to ignore the flurry of fantasies he suddenly had about the hands holding the book. They both hurried back to her bedroom, Faith still holding the book, and Wesley with an armful of small boxes and bottles.

She climbed into bed while Wesley started to draw a circle a couple of feet away.

"The bed needs to be inside the circle. Could you please move it away from the wall?" he asked.

Faith sighed, got out of bed and pushed the headboard away from the wall with a single hand. He was considering that there were many benefits of having sex with a Slayer when Faith let the sheet fall to the floor, and all lighthearted thoughts melted away in a renewed wave of desire.

"This better work," he muttered, reaching for the book to read again the next step.

Faith was laying on her belly, holding the book in front oh her, open at the right page. Her demure attitude contrasted beautifully with the glimpse of her chest over the book that made sure he was aware of what was hidden behind the hard covers. Wesley traced the text with his fingers, further and further up until they left the paper and were trailing on her skin. He was tempted to push the book aside and run his palm down on her breast forgetting about the spell for a while.

"What's wrong, Wes? You lost your place? Do you want me to read you what you have to do?" she asked, in a sweet tone of false concern.

"I want you..." he said, letting his voice trail off while his hand was cupping her face.

"Yes?" she encouraged him to go on.

"Yes," he agreed rubbing a thumb over her cheek and a corner of her mouth.

Faith's voice was low and hesitant as she read aloud the rest of the steps for the creation of a protective circle. Wesley felt as if every whispered word was a caress on his skin. He only barely managed to follow her instructions without making any mistakes. He turned to look at her once he heard the book being slammed shut.

"Do you think this comes under the heading of safe sex?" she asked, with a twinkle of satisfaction in her eyes while his hungry gaze was sweeping all over her body.

The man didn't answer. He took off his shoes and his shirt letting everything fall inside the circle, then sat on the bed next to her to take off his socks. Before he stood up to take off his pants he took the book that Faith had forgotten on the pillow next to her. He let it drop by the bed when he felt her hands on his back.

He couldn't move for several long moments. He heard her crawl behind him on her knees. He felt the bed dip as she moved closer. When she pressed her breasts into his back and circled his torso with her arms, Wesley had to close his eyes. She was kissing his shoulder and neck, stopping for a while on his earlobe, then down again along his neck and shoulder, while her hands were roaming over his chest and abdomen, pausing from time to time to trace one scar or another.

'How do I compare so far?' he wanted to ask.

"What if the circle doesn't work?" he asked instead.

Faith suddenly pulled away from him. Before he could protest or apologize or beg for her to come back, she was next to him, pushing him down on the bed and straddling his lap. Wesley smiled lightheaded with relief. He put his hands on her waist and waited for her to come down to him.

Their gazes remained locked while she lowered her head slowly toward him. When their lips finally met, it felt every bit as intense as if it were their first kiss. Wesley closed his eyes and let the perfection of the moment engulf him. He would never regret this. Whatever the result of the quest for his soul, he couldn't possibly regret that he had been blessed with the chance to feel something so beautiful.

~~~~~~~

To be continued...