Was It Always Like This?

Chapter 12

Willow phoned ahead to arrange another visit to the Residential Home. Mrs Wayne was waiting in the foyer as they arrived and looked towards Giles as Willow shook her hand. “Mrs Wayne, I’d like to introduce you to one of the foremost experts on residual spiritual activity, Professor Rupert Giles”

Giles tried to look professorial and vowed to speak severely to Willow when they were alone, she hadn’t mentioned his promotion. “It’s a pleasure to meet you Mrs Wayne” he smiled politely.

The older woman seemed to take a long time to release his hand and Willow was sure she noticed a slight blush as she held Giles’ gaze.

Willow finally coughed. “Perhaps we could meet the residents from our last visit and then I believe the professor would like to take some readings in the areas where the occurrences have been most frequent”

“Of course, we’ll use the same room as before if that was OK for you?” she finally looked towards Willow and unconsciously ran her hand through her hair. “Can I get you some coffee?” she looked back towards Giles as she opened the door and motioned them to enter the room.

“Not right now thank you” he replied and smiled at her again.

Willow tried to hide her grin as the older woman mimicked his smile for a few seconds before gathering herself. “I’ll just go and tell the residents that you are here” she finally said and turned rather abruptly to leave the room.

“Willow!” he said in a quiet undertone. “Why on earth did you decide on the title?”

“It just seemed to fit, what with the stuffy old tweed suit and everything” she pointed vaguely at his attire, tried to look apologetic but couldn’t carry it off. “I thought it would impress the matron but I didn’t allow for the older woman, killer charm working its magic”

“What on earth are you talking about?” he asked and started to pace a little.

“Oh please, she was practically falling over herself at your smile and the extra English accent didn’t hurt either” she nodded her approval. “I’d forgotten how sexy that could sound when you first come across it”

He stood speechless in the centre of the room and was finally gathering his wits to ask exactly what she was talking about when the smitten Mrs Wayne returned with two older women and a suspicious looking man in tow.

Willow moved forward to meet them and directed everyone to the chairs she had rearranged into a semi circle. “Where’s Mike?” she asked and realised the truth as she looked at the sad faces of the others. “I’m sorry, I didn’t know” she mumbled and Giles saw her physically returning to the awkward school girl from the professional woman who had entered the home with him.

He stepped forward and introduced himself to the three residents, giving her time to recollect herself.

“Am I to understand that one of your friends is no longer with us?” he asked Ernie.

Ernie nodded and looked towards Willow with some trepidation. “He died last week” he seemed a little reluctant to share the details.

“Was he ill?” Giles asked gently and was aware of Willow pulling herself together and getting her notebook out of her bag.

Kate shook her head. “He was fine right up until he went to bed” she seemed to pause for a moment as if deciding whether or not to go on. “When they found him in the morning he was crouched in the corner and the room was freezing cold.”

Willow looked up sharply. “You think he had another episode?”

Ernie shook his head. “I don’t think Mike was the kind of guy to get scared enough to up and die on us” he looked severely at the two women. “But he might have imagined anything if he took unwell during the night”

“This puts rather a different complexion on things” Giles sighed and removed his glasses. “I’m afraid I’ll need you all to go through your accounts again and I’ll need to see your rooms and the room where Mike was”

Sheila sniffled a little into a lace handkerchief “It all started a few weeks ago and it has happened to all of us twice” she looked genuinely scared now and Giles leaned across to put his hand on her arm. She smiled a little weakly at him. “If it came to Mike again that would have been his third visit, do you think that has anything to do with him passing like that?”

Willow started to shake her head in an automatic attempt to allay their fears when Giles leaned back and looked at all three. “I’m not sure and I’m sorry for the loss of your friend but perhaps after today I will be able to put your minds at rest. I’ll certainly do all I can to work out what has been happening here and, with Ms Rosenberg’s help, I’m sure we’ll be able to put a stop to it”

The two women looked a little reassured about this but Ernie seemed to get a suspicious look on his face. “What exactly are you a professor of?”

Giles looked towards Willow and raised his eyebrows in an ‘I told you so’ look, before turning back to the old man. “I’m a Professor of Ancient History and my doctorate was completed at Oxford many years ago. My specialisation since then has given me an insight into the workings of residual spirit activity of this kind and Ms Rosenberg has had occasion to call upon my expertise on several interesting cases over the years.”

Willow kept facing the three residents while her mind tried to work out whether he was lying or not. It was perfectly feasible that his Watcher training had actually resulted in some kind of qualification, she must remember to ask him about it later. “I’m sorry, perhaps this isn’t the best time for us to be here?” she asked and started to put her notebook back into her handbag.

Kate scowled at Ernie and handed Sheila another handkerchief. “Please don’t go, Ernie just finds it difficult to forget his background and treats everyone like a suspect in an interrogation”

Giles waved his hand in the air as if to forget the entire incident. “You were a policeman in Sunnydale?” he asked the older man and knew by the wary look in his eyes that the answer was going to be yes. This was confirmed when Ernie nodded his head slightly, but he was obviously not going to discuss it any further. “I’ve spent some time here in the past and I think you would agree that it is best to face the unusual things that happen here or they will generally just get worse?” Giles suggested.

Ernie nodded his head again and seemed to sag a little, as if the fight had gone out of him. Kate noticed the exchange and turned to Willow with a puzzled look on her face. “Has this kind of thing happened here before?”

“Not exactly this but sometimes unusual events have been known to happen in the Dale that is Sunny” she tried to keep her tone light and was relieved to see both women relax a little. “Perhaps Sheila could get us started by running through what happened to her?” she asked and turned to look at Giles.

He nodded and turned his full attention to the older woman. “Please, anything you can remember, no matter how insignificant, would be helpful”

After two hours the three residents stood to leave and Willow was relieved to see Mrs Wayne hovering outside the room. “Is everything alright?” she asked anxiously.

Giles finished cleaning his glasses and turned his best dazzling smile on her. “Everything’s fine, I just need ten minutes with Ms Rosenberg to sort through some details then we would like to have a look at the affected rooms if that is suitable?”

She simpered “Of course, is there anything I can get for you, coffee or tea perhaps?”

“A mug of your tea would undoubtedly help the brain cells” he suggested and heard Willow snort behind him. He watched the older woman walk away, noticing the decided sway that she appeared to have suddenly acquired, before closing the door and turning to Willow. She was sitting watching him with a large grin on her face. “What is it now?” he asked, unable to keep the smile from his own face.

“I’ve never seen you do that before, it’s just kind of weird” she shook her head. “At least now I know what Buffy meant when she said you were her rakish uncle”

“Perhaps we should collate the information and finish up here before we continue this ridiculous conversation later?” he asked and sat down next to her to look at her notes.

Two cups of tea later they were directed to the east wing, the area where the disturbances had been reported. They found Ernie keeping a lookout for them and he signalled them to follow him when they turned the corner. “I didn’t want to say anything when the ladies were there earlier but I’m not so sure that Mike didn’t get another visit that night.”

“Did you hear something?” Giles asked as he followed the man into what was obviously his room.

“Heard some groaning but that could just as easily have been old Mr McFadyen in Room 26” he suggested and turned to see Giles’ reaction.

“Giles look at this” Willow said before he had a chance to answer. She was standing in front of some pictures hanging on the wall behind the door. “Recognise this one?” she asked as she pointed to a picture of Ernie in his uniform shaking hands with the Mayor.

“Did you know him well?” Giles asked in as neutral a tone of voice as he could manage.

“Pretty well, up until he changed into a giant snake and tried to eat the graduating class at the high school” Ernie replied matter of factly and sat down in a large chair beside the window.

Willow frowned and put her hand into her pocket to check the stake she always carried there.

Giles shook his head slightly and placed his hand on her arm. “I thought you seemed unfazed by the subject of unusual events” he said in a quiet voice that Willow recognised as dangerous to whoever was on the end of it. “Do you want to tell us exactly how much you know of what has been going on here”

The old man took a deep breath and puffed his cheeks out as he exhaled. “I’ve seen some pretty strange things over the years, there were nights when vampires were the least of my worries, but I’ve never come across anything like this” he said and met Giles’ eyes. “I know some of what goes on in this town and I recognised you the minute you walked in. I’ve seen you around too many crime scenes to think you are just a visiting Professor” he waited to give Giles the chance to refute this allegation.

“Actually I am, technically, a Professor and I am just visiting but you are correct in thinking I used to be a little more involved in this town’s problems” He nodded towards Willow. “Willow is a member of a group of people who are concerned with making sure that the demons and vampires don’t win the day and they picked up on the occurrences here and asked me to have a look because it is something of an interest of mine”

Willow came to stand next to him. “He’s the best chance we have of getting rid of whateis cis causing this trouble.” She lifted her chin a little and brought out her resolve face to prove her sincerity.

Ernie flinched a little and started to smile. “OK, I believe you but I don’t really know much more than I told you earlier”

“Do you think it was Mr McFadyen that was groaning or was it Mike?” Giles asked as he sat down on the edge of the bed.

“Was his room quite near to this?” Willow asked as she glanced around then sat down next to Giles.

“Next door that way” Ernie motioned. “It was Mike all right but there was no way in Hell I was getting out of bed to see if he was OK” he seemed to get a little belligerent again. “I only heard one groan and then it all went quiet so I just assumed he had heartburn and turned over”

Willow looked towards Giles but he was deep in thought. “Perhaps you did the right thing, if it was another episode you might have been attacked as well if you had gone in there”

He didn’t look much happier at her attempt to salve his conscience. “Spent my life knocking down doors to help other folks, didn’t used to matter that I was putting myself on the line” he said and sank into silence.

Willow seemed about to say something else when Giles put his hand on her arm and led her out of the room. “I’ll let you know what we find” he said quietly as he closed the door to the old man’s room behind them. “Not much we can do to help his guilt but let’s try to sort out the rest of this mess, shall we?”

Willow nodded and took the key Mrs Wayne had given her, fitting it into the door next to Ernie’s. They both stood in the doorway for a moment and took in the contents of the room. It had obviously been cleared of any personal effects but Willow could still feel the presence of the self assured man she had met some weeks before.

Giles stepped into the room and she followed him, closing the door behind her. He stood in the centre of the room and pulled a small notebook from his jacket pocket. Flipping through the pages he finally found what he was looking for and glanced up to make sure Willow was ready.

She had taken a small candle from her shoulder bag and lit it. She mumbled a few words under her breath and then nodded to Giles that she was ready.

He smiled to reassure her and then slowly read out a phrase in Latin from the book in his hands. Willow didn’t recognise all of the words but she knew he was calling forth the spirits of those who had inhabited the room to help him in his search for whatever was causing the problems.

She let her gaze travel around the room as her mind expanded to try to sense any spirits who may heed Giles’ summons. As her eyes finally reached him standing in the middle of the room, his eyes closed and his hand holding the notebook at his side, she smiled at the reaction he had gained from the older women. She realised with a jolt that she was missing his close presence in her mind and, although they had never discussed it since his return, she finally admitted to herself that she wanted him to be that close to her all of the time. She felt his mind as it reached out to the rooms on either side of the one they were in and shivered a little as she was overwhelmed by the gentleness he could convey, even in these situations. Perhaps she was more aware than anyone of the steel that ran through him as well but had to admit that she was lucky to have been the recipient of his loyalty and affection on such a personal level.

Giles slowed his breathing and relaxed as he reached out to contact any spirits who were trapped within the confines of the home. He had come across many occasions where institutions like this played host to more than the paying residents. What was curious was that he couldn’t sense any other presence and he decided to widen the search a little. Still mumbling the Latin phrase under his breath he expanded his search to take in a slightly larger area, however the same results frustrated him. The only souls he could recognise were those of the living and this was so unusual that it took him a moment to notice the bright spark that was Willow within his mind. He smiled and began to withdraw from the surrounding rooms. He admitted to himself that it would be a wrench to cut the connection between both of them again but she had seemed quite relieved when he had returned and they had not regained their mental link. Slowly he opened his eyes and squinted slightly as the afternoon sun was now streaming in through the window. He turned to ask Willow if she was OK and caught his breath. She was standing directly in the sunlight with a smile of sheer contentment on her face. He couldn’t remember ever seeing her looking so beautiful and almost dropped his book.

After a few minutes Willow had closed her eyes to better concentrate on her search. Strangely, she had found it difficult to focus her mind on the task at hand while watching Giles. Rolling her shoulders slightly she relaxed a little more and followed his lead in expanding her search. She smiled unconsciously, thrilled that she still had access to a power that might have been denied her and that she was using it to help people.

“Willow” he said quietly, unwilling to startle her. “Willow, can you hear me?”

She took a deep breath and opened her eyes, momentarily blinded by the sun until he stepped in front of her. “Oh” she sighed. “Hi, are we OK?” she smiled up at him and he couldn’t help smiling back.

“We are fine but I don’t think there is much else we can do here today” he pocketed the book and cupped his hands around the candle she still held, gently blowing the flame out. “We should return home and continue with our internet search” he suggested.

She caught her breath as he leaned in closer to her to blow out the candle. She could feel his breath on her shoulder and shuddered a little. Her mind snapped back to full clarity and she took a step backwards. “Oh” she felt herself blushing. “Home sounds good” she glanced at her watch. “In fact, if we hurry, we could meet up with Dawn and walk her home from school”

He stepped back as well and shook his head slowly. He could have sworn that she was almost afraid of the closeness they had just shared and he immediately heard alarm bells go off in his head. “Are you sure you are feeling alright, perhaps the search was a little too much for you?” he asked and moved to open the door for her.

“Nope, everything is just fine, just felt a little spaced out at the end there, what with all the relaxing and flamey candle and everything” she assured him but seemed in an awful rush to leave the enclosed space of the room. “Just fine” she muttered to herself, “only if just fine can be translated in some weird language to mean going off of my head”. She strode behind him to the front door and let him make the polite leaving noises to Mrs Wayne. When she heard the older woman try to delay their departure and saw her holding onto his hand as before her patience finally snapped. “Professor Giles” she said in a sharp tone. “We have the other meeting to attend and we are already late.” She headed out the front door without even waiting to see if he followed her. “What the hell was that?” she asked herself.

“What the hell was that?” Giles asked her as he lengthened his stride to catch up with her. “Willow, stop” he ordered and put his hand on her shoulder. He noticed the slight shudder that went through her at his touch and took a step back again. “Please, tell me what is wrong and we can fix it together, did you sense something back there?”

She shook her head and took a couple of deep breaths. “Honestly it wasn’t anything to do with the spell, I would tell you if it was” she was finally calming down and rerunning the events in her mind to try to sort through her feelings.

“Something must have happened for you to react like this” he suggested quietly and began walking again.

She moved to walk next to him. “I’m not sure” she admitted. “One minute we were doing the floaty mind thing and the next I’m getting really fed up with that woman pawing you” she shrugged her shoulders. “Perhaps it’s just a reaction to the spell after all but I don’t feel any magical after effects” she stopped again and he turned round to meet her g “C “Can you check me out?” she asked plaintively and smiled a little at the surprised look on his face. “I mean inside my head” she sighed and then felt an almost physical sense of loss. She shook her head again and said “You know what, let’s just walk for a while and we’ll see if this weird mood lifts any”

As they headed towards the school in silence Giles tried to surreptitiously stretch out his mind to calm hers but he was tired from the earlier spell and eventually decided to wait until they were both back home before trying anything too invasive. He sighed as he remembered the days when he could wield his magics for days on end and never have anything more than a headache to show for it. The coven had suggested that he would build up his stamina again but they weren’t sure how long it would take and he had suggested that he used magics so rarely these days that it hardly mattered. Now, when it did matter, he was annoyed at his weakness. He knew that something had spooked Willow earlier but he hadn’t sensed anything and wasn’t sure if she had the power to see beyond what he had found.

They had walked for several minutes before Willow squinted up at him and smiled a little. “Sorry about my snappiness back there, I don’t know what came over me”

He shrugged his shoulders “Either you were attacked by a demon who had the ability to hide its presence from two of the most experienced practitioners of magic in this hemisphere or..” he turned to smile down at her.

“Or?” she asked a little nervously.

“Or” he said, dragging the word out “You were genuinely afraid for my virtue with that awful woman and decided to sacrifice your natural good manners and remove us from her presence forthwith?”

She started giggling and playfully punched his arm “You were being a complete tease back there and anything that she had tried on you would have been your own fault” she finally managed to get out.

“You said that earlier, about my woman killing charm, what did I do?” he asked, seemingly genuinely puzzled.

“Actually I said older woman killer charm” she smiled sweetly at him as she stressed the ‘older’. “You were all ‘ooohh charmed to meet you ma’am’ and British and you must know what that does to American ladies of a certain age?” she started giggling again.

He shook his head. “Are you telling me that my particular brand of charm doesn’t work on anyone under the age of 55?” he stuffed his hands in his trouser pockets. “Older women used to be a bit of a goal but now I’m nearly there myself I think I’d prefer a younger model”

“At least Anya’s safe from your evil machinations” she suggested and cocked her head to look at him more closely as he blushed and ducked his head to avoid her gaze. “What is it, don’t tell me you have a thing for her as well?” she asked in an exasperated tone. “Why is it that all of the men in my life go for the 1100 year old demon thing” she sighed.

“I do not ‘go’ for her” he said in his defense. “It was just you reminded me of a rather embarrassing incident and what do you mean all of the men in your life?” he thought he had neatly segued into another subject but she was not willing to let this drop.

“Incident?” she raised her eyebrows and put her arm through his. “Ooohhh tell all to your agony aunt” she giggled and felt his sigh from deep within his chest. Suddenly she felt uncomfortable and pulled her arm free but tried to keep a smile on her face to encourage him to share.

He felt her tense against him before removing her arm and quickly tried to make a comparison with her previous strange mood and jumpiness. Shaking his head he filed it in his memory for later and ruefully shook his head as he resigned himself to telling her some of the story. “……and when we came back to ourselves we were kissing and then we cleaned the shop” he finished in a rush.

“You kissed Anya!” she asked incredulously as he tried to quiet her voice. “Are we talking ‘fatherly’ or ‘rakish uncle’ with the lip action?” she asked and practically bounced as they continued to head for the school.

He sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. “If you must know we thought we were engaged and were making up after a row so it was…” he cast about for the word least likely to provoke another noisy outburst as they neared the school grounds. “Appropriate” he finally settled and ignored her when she stopped walking and stared after him. “Does this mean I will finally get to meet the evil Martin?” he asked as she started walking again and caught up with him.

She shook her head. “We will continue this later” she waggled her finger in front of him. “That’s Martin there, holding Dawn’s bag” she motioned towards a small group of youngsters. “Hey Dawnie” she shouted and turned to Giles. “Behave yourself, he’s already had the third degree from Buffy and he doesn’t need the ‘father figure’ stern talk, OK?” she asked.

“I am not her father” he insisted and then realised that this probably wasn’t the best place to make such stern pronouncements. “Hello Dawn” he said as the youngsters came over to meet them “We thought we would take you for some coffee before we headed home for dinner” he said in a milder tone and looked expectantly at the embarrassed young man standing next to her. “You must be Martin” he held out his hand. “I’ve heard a lot about you” he smiled and was sorry that their first meeting had to happen when he had deliberately worn his stuffiest tweed suit to impress Mrs Wayne.

“Hi” Martin replied nervously before turning to Dawn. “If you need to go I’ll see you tomorrow, we can do the other thing another time”

Dawn had an agonised look on her face and turned towards Willow for help.

“Martin, why don’t you join us, we were just going to grab a couple of mochas with the extra frothy cream” she motioned with her head for him to join them and smiled.

“OK” he shrugged. “If you’re sure I won’t get in the way”

Dawn mouthed “Thank you” over her shoulder as she walked in front of her friends to catch up with Martin.

Giles hung back a little and bent down to speak quietly in Willow’s ear. “Does he remind you of anyone?” he asked and inadvertently caught a whiff of her perfume.

Willow practically jumped out of her skin as she felt his breath against her ear and neck and had to take a deep breath herself before answering. “If you are planning on mentioning a shy child genius of your recent acquaintance you will be paying for the coffees”

“It’s a deal” he smiled at her and remembered the first time he had met her. She had been so young and eager and he couldn’t even begin to understand the changes within her to bring him to the present day young woman. This was probably just as well as he was rapidly becoming infatuated with the present day version and he had to constantly remind himself that he was her friend and she didn’t need that kind of complication in her life, even if she hadn’t made her sexual preference so clear. It made his own internal struggle a little easier if he managed to separate the innocent young child he had met only six years before from the confident, far from innocent woman who was walking in front of him right now. He gave himself an internal shake to stop himself from admiring the vie she she caught up with the others and leaned down to whisper something in Dawn’s ear. He still had three weeks of close confinement to get through and he tried to drag his mind back to the matter at hand to give himself some breathing space.

*****

Dawn slid into a booth and looked a little disappointed when Martin chose the seat facing her. Giles sat next to her and smiled his thanks as Willow deposited his drink in front of him.

“I thought you would drink tea” Martin suggested shyly as Giles blew some of the froth from the top of his mug.

Giles smiled as Willow giggled into her froth, getting some on her nose. “I spent six years here, on and off, and I grew accustomed to the awful local beverages” he smiled as he leaned over to run his thumb over her nose. “You don’t want a froth moustache” he suggested solemnly “The girls don’t find that attractive for some reason”

Dawn started to giggle and Martin stared in astonishment between Giles and Willow.

Willow had tensed as he had reached out to her and was so concerned at the intimacy of his actions that she had to replay his remark in her head before she caught the meaning. “Giles” she squeaked. “Not in front of the young adults”

Dawn kept laughing as she leaned over and explained to Martin in a stage whisper. “Willow is gay and we’re trying to get her a girlfriend” Martin just blushed a little and nodded in a wise manner as if he came across this sort of thing every day.

“Dawn” Willow squeaked again and looked aghast at the youngster. “First of all I don’t think Martin wants to know and secondly I can find a girlfriend all by myself, I don’t think you guys are going to be much of a help”

Giles looked a little hurt. “I’m hurt that you don’t want to learn from a master” he waggled an eyebrow and waited to see how she would react.

Willow checked herself just before she launched into a detailed discussion of his success with the ladies, including Dawn’s mother! “I don’t want a girlfriend so this discussion will resume along normal, safe, teenager type lines for the duration or I will make it my business to tell Buffy before your next training session”

Dawn sighed and leaned towards Martin again. “Giles taught Buffy some karate when she was younger and they still train whenever he comes to visit”

Martin nodded but didn’t look convinced that this explanation covered all of the undertones in the conversation.

Giles took pity on the young man and started a discussion on their science projects to get him back onto familiar territory. He tuned out a little as the three became animated about some sort of enzyme reaction and he ran through the previous conversation, realising that he was trying to push the boundaries of his relationships to fit into the mould of their current situation. He didn’t want to continue only as the ‘go to guy’ whenever something evil reared its head in Sunnydale, he wanted to foster more adult relationships with all of them. He acknowledged that Willow was going to prove quite an interesting challenge as his relationship with her had changed beyond his wildest imagination but he was also aware of a need to have a serious conversation with Buffy. She had been quite jumpy since his return and he had put this down to her concerns over Willow and the problem they were investigating. However, the more he thought about it, the more he came to the conclusion that she was also not quite sure how to react to him as something other than a Watcher.

Dawn nudged him with her elbow. “Giles?” she said, obviously for the second time. “Are you finished, we need to get home soon or Buffy will start to worry.”

He came back to the present and looked around the others. “Sorry I was miles away” he smiled. “Did you sort out your science project?” he asked politely as he held out his hand to help Dawn escape the clutches of the faux leather seat.

Martin moved next to him to take Dawn’s bag from her and nodded. “Willow came up with some neat ideas, I think I’ll head straight home to start work on them”

Dawn pouted a little and moved a few steps away to retrieve her bag and make her goodbyes.

Willow sighed and turned to Giles as he laughed at her. “I know, I always get all nostalgic for that time in my life when I should just run screaming from the memories of high school” she smiled a little and moved ahead of him to leave the coffee shop.

“Willow those were some of the best years of your life, you finally realised that you weren’t an ugly duckling and that being smart could actually make a difference in many important ways, not just keeping your mother and father happy” he reassured her.

She nodded and turned to make sure Dawn was behind them. She grinned and nudged Giles as the youngsters quickly shared a chaste kiss before heading in opposite directions. She was still grinning when Dawn joined them and nudged her as well. “Was Martin OK with meeting the olds?” she giggled.

Dawn put her arm through Willow’s and pulled her closer. “He really likes you, especially after the project thing. Thanks for including him in the invite” She turned to look at Giles. “He also said he thought you were quite cool after we told him about the sword fighting and stuff”

Giles looked a little confused. “I know my mind was on other things but what exactly did you tell him?” he asked, unsure if he wanted to hear this or not.

Willow giggled as Dawn explained. “Just that you were an old family friend who was a fencing master at Oxford and you were visiting to make sure we were all safe and well and that we had plenty of new shoes for the upcoming winter” Dawn smiled sweetly at him.

“Am I to take it from that, that the Mall trip is planned for this weekend?” he asked with a resigned sigh. When they both nodded he shrugged his shoulders and put his hands in his pockets. “Martin must think me very brave and dashing if you told him about the shoe shopping” he smiled and walked a little ahead before turning with a wicked smile to deliver his coupe de grace. “However, when Buffy finds out you were kissing a member of the science club in the coffee shop I suspect you will be grounded for about ten years.”

“Hey, nobody ever bothered when Tara did it!” Dawn exclaimed and then held her breath. She didn’t normally mention her friend when Willow was around but hoped that the time was right to start doing so. She carefully watched Willow’s face and saw the initial pain cross her face to be replaced with something a lot more welcome.

Willow was shocked by the casual use of Tara’s name out of the blue but then she registered what Dawn had said. “Hey, wait a minute, I wasn’t a science geek by the time I met Tara, I was all cool and at college and sophisticated and how come my love life comes back into the discussion again anyway?” She paused for a breath and couldn’t help but join in the laughter of the others.

Giles headed for the kitchen when they arrived home, to find Buffy preparing dinner. “Do you need a hand?” he asked as he moved to wash his hands at the sink. “Willow and Dawn have gone to catalogue their current wardrobes and cross reference their requirements from the Mall weekend”

Buffy smiled at him. “You shouldn’t let Dawn get carried away, she’ll max out your cards at the first shop”

He took over the preparation of some vegetables and she leaned against the counter watching his hands. “I don’t mind and it makes up for the times I can’t be with her” he concentrated for a moment on slicing and dicing. “Anyway, it’s not just Dawn, you and Willow are to be allowed to join the great shopping trip as well”

Buffy smiled at him. “I don’t need any more shoes, I’m just glad to have you here and for everyone to be happy instead of in mortal danger”

He looked incredulously at her and held up two knives in a crucifix formation. “You don’t need shoes???? Get away from me you fiend!” he mimed pushing her back towards the door.

She swatted him with a dishtowel. “OK, perhaps I was exaggerating a little, but you know you don’t have to take us shopping, you just have to be here”

He put the knives down and pulled the dishtowel from her shoulder to dry his hands. “I know Buffy but I just want to do things that we don’t normally get the opportunity for. Shopping trips to the Mall may seem a strange way to clutter up my holiday but I never got to do any of that with you when you were Dawn’s age”

She watched him as he leaned against the worktops and crossed his arms. “You were too busy teaching me to save lives and protecting mine” she suggested and pulled open the fridge. “Besides, how would you have explained shopping for clothes with two of your students?”

“Good point” he nodded and accepted a glass of juice from her. “But it doesn’t mean that I didn’t miss having a closer relationship with any of you than we were able to achieve. I never wanted to be your father, although god knows you could have used one over the last few years” he allowed the anger at Hank’s lack of interest to show a little more than usual. “But I think we have all reached the stage where we can take a step back from the constant y ovy over the next apocalypse and try to reconstruct our relationships as adults?”

Buffy nodded. She had never before seen his anger over her father’s disappearance from her life and felt a little reassured that she wasn’t the only one who thought it worthy of simmering resentment. He had also touched on some of her own feelings over the last few weeks, when she had been aware of his visit as causing a strange presentiment of change in their future dealings with each other. They stood quietly drinking their juice for a few moments, both running through their current situation in their minds. “I think I know what you mean” she finally suggested. “I’ve been feeling a bit weird for the last few weeks, I was scared we wouldn’t have anything to talk about when you weren’t here for business” she looked up and met his eyes, catching the pain that flitted across his face. “But I knew that something was wrong with me for thinking that way and I was trying to let go and be one with the fun even before you came in here and got all Buddha with the veggies”

“Buddha?” he asked a little worriedly. “I remind you of a bald, plump little god?”

“Well you are getting on a bit old man” she started to giggle. “Actually I was meaning all self aware and holistic” she smiled, quite proud that she had come up with the big word in the end.

He shuddered slightly and took his glasses off before vigorously polishing them. “Even after all e yee years you’re innate ability to mangle the English language amazes me. I was never able to teach you to improve your vocabulary but you have taught me to understand yours and I don’t know what is more upsetting” he replaced his glasses and shook his head. “Before you ruin this moment, can I just say that I am enjoying this trip more than I had dared hoped and I include the upcomieekeeekend plans”

“Oh good” she sighed and carried some dishes towards the table. “Cause you know I was joking about the shoes and the not needing thing, don’t you?”

He shook his head and followed her with some more plates, shouting for Dawn and Willow to join them for dinner.