His Worth

Willow opened the door and walked in without knocking, with Tara in tow behind her.
“Buffy? Buffy?” she called out. She could here sniffles coming from the master bedroom.
“I’ll wait here, honey” Tara told Willow not wanting to make Buffy uncomfortable with her presence.
Willow made her way back to the bedroom. She found Buffy sitting with her knees drawn up to her chest and her head down resting on them. She looked up as Willow came through the door.
“Spike?” she questioned with blurry eyes.
“No, honey. It’s me Willow” she sat down on the floor with her.
Buffy rubbed her eyes. “Oh, sorry. Thanks for coming. Is Tara with you?”
“Yes. She is out in the living room. Thought we could use some alone time. Can I get you anything? A glass of water? Tissues? Anything?” Willow asked.
“No, I’m alright.” Buffy answered.
“You want to tell me what happened?” Willow prodded.
“Promise you won’t be mad at me for lying to you?” Buffy sniffled some more.
“I promise” Willow replied.
Buffy proceeded to explain to Willow about her and Spike, who Xander really was, and the charade they had been playing for Hank. She came clean about everything even the fact that Spike had been a hooker. Willow was understandably shocked but she took it better than expected. Buffy couldn’t believe she had finally told someone from her life before Spike. It hadn’t been as bad as she thought.
Buffy finished her story and she did feel a little better getting all of that out.
“What if he never comes back, Willow? I don’t think I can live without him” Buffy started to tear up again. Her eyes were already puffy and swollen.
“You did tell him to leave, Buffy. But if he really loves you, I think he will. Are you sure that’s what you want though? I mean, after what he did to you?” Willow sighed. She didn’t really know what to tell her. All she could do was be there for her.
“Tried to…he didn’t actually…” Buffy looked away.
“How abou go go out to the kitchen and stuff ourselves with junk food? You do have ice cream, right?” Willow asked.
“Of course. Chunky Monkey, I think.” Buffy laughed a little.
“See? There’s my girl! Things never seem quite as bad when ice cream is involved, no?” Willow smiled.
She helped Buffy to her feet.
“Oh my. I must look a mess. I don’t want Tara to see me like this. Let me go to the bathroom first” Buffy let Willow go ahead.
Buffy splashed cold water on her face and patted it dry with a towel. She brushed her hair and put it in a pony tail. She removed the remains of her tattered shirt and pants and put some sweats and a t-shirt on. When she felt presentable enough she joined Willow and Tara in the kitchen who were scooping ice cream into bowls.
“Hi” Buffy said nervously not sure what Tara must be thinking about her.
“Hello Buffy. It’s so nice to meet you. I’m sorry it’s under these circumstances for your sake. Is there anything I can do for you?” Tara said warmly with a shy smile.
“Nice to meet you too. Sorry to drag you out tonight. You must think I’m some kind of basket case.” Buffy fidgeted.
“Of course not. We’ve all been there, Buffy. You’re human. Please don’t feel bad on my account” Tara smiled again.
“You picked a good one, Willow” Buffy smiled back at Tara as a new friendship began to blossom then and there.
“O.K.! Who’s for some monkey goodness?” Willow shoved bowls at Buffy and Tara.
Buffy ate her ice cream thinking about where Spike was and hoping Xander had found him before he inevitably did something really stupid, knowing him.

“Come on, man. Don’t make this more difficult than it has to be” Xander pleaded with Spike.
“Sod off, whelp! Leave me alone” Spike took another swig of his whiskey.
“No, you sod off you stupid British dumb guy” Xander said in exasperation.
“This how it’s going to be every time something doesn’t go your way, Spike? Anytime you and Buffy have a fight? You can’t keep trying to drink your troubles away. It doesn’t work that way. The troubles still are there when the morning light comes.” Xander preached.
“You need help man. You have any idea what you almost did tonight?” Spike cringed.
“DO YOU?” Xander raised his voice. “Because I don’t think you do or you wouldn’t be sitting here like an asshole. Instead you’d be on your knees begging Buffy’s forgiveness”
“She’s the one that told ME to leave!” Spike yelled back at Xander.
“So that’s it? You don’t even try and fight for her, man? She’s the best thing that ever happened to you and you just walk away from it that easily? She was hurt and upset. She loves you though.” Xander continued.
“Right. Bloody bitch loves my cock, that’s all. Told me so much herself” Spike seethed.
“I think you know that’s not the truth” Xander replied.
“What do you know, Harris? She used to bloody pay me for it...for months she did. What do you think about that? She isn’t your fucking angel up on a pedestal now is she?” Spike swore.
“Look, I might not know everything that has gone on between you both but I’m not so stupid that I can’t tell when two people love each other.” Xander pressed on.
“Come on, Spike. Let’s go home. It will be alright.” Xander begged. “Buffy told me I could still stay” he added.
“Isn’t that just bloody great? You go on then. Go home to the bint. Maybe you can fill in for me, if you know what I mean” Spike suggested.
“Don’t even go there man. It’s not like that and you know it” Xander retorted.
“You run on home. Don’t you worry about ol’ Spike” He got up and slapped a few bills on the bar then turned and stumbled away.
“Spike, you’re in no condition….”Xander started.
Spike gave him a two finger salute and was out the door.
Xander sighed. Buffy was probably going to kill him if he came home without Spike however Spike was bound to kill him if he tried to take him home.
He left the bar with a heavy heart and made his way back to Buffy’s. He hated being the bearer of bad news.

Spike’s destination was a bit closer. He found himself in his old working grounds. He propped himself up against a store front and lit a fag.
He wasn’t there long before a car pulled up and opened its door. “Get in” a voice came from the driver’s seat.
Spike walked over and leaned down seeing one of his previous regular customers.
“Where you been? Haven’t seen you around for awhile.” The john said.
“Vacation” Spike said and got in the car. “Let’s go, mate”

Xander arrived home to find Buffy and two other women eating every type of junk food imaginable. Cartons and containers lay strewn across the kitchen counter and the three ladies sat at the table all looking sick.
“Did I miss the last supper?” Xander joked.
“Hi Xander. Remember me?” Willow asked him. “Oh, Buffy told me about everything so I know you’re not gay. I still am though. Just so we’re clear” she smiled.
“Me too” squeaked Tara.
“Xander, this is my girlfriend, Tara.” Willow introduced them.
“Nice to meet you” Tara smiled.
“You too.” Xander responded.
“Did you find him?” Buffy finally spoke.
“Yes.”, Xander answered her then looked away.
“Is he O.K.?” she prodded.
“Well…he is alive, if that’s what you mean. Look, Buffy…I found him at Willy’s and he was drunk again and I tried to get him to come home but he wouldn’t and he left. I couldn’t force him” Xander looked down.
“But where will he go? Did he have any money?” Buffy asked.
“I think so. He had money to pay his bar tab, which by the way he was drinking though may have taken all his cash” Xander answered.
“I’m sure he will be fine. He knows how to get by, Buffy. He’s been doing it for years. Just let things cool off for a few days and I’m sure he will come back” Xander tried to assure her.
“Buffy? You think you’ll be O.K. now? Tara and I have to get going.” Willow chimed in.
”Oh, yes. That’s fine. Xander is back now. He can keep me company.” Buffy told her.
Willow and Tara helped clean up the kitchen before saying their goodbyes. Hugs were given all around.
“Thank you for coming, Will” Buffy said.
“Anytime. That’s what friends are for” Willow responded. She and Tara left arm in arm.
Buffy told Xander she was exhausted and if it was alright with him she was just going to turn in. He said he was hitting the hay himself.
Both in separate bedrooms and for separate reasons lay awake staring at the ceiling thinking about where Spike was now and what he was doing.

“Fuck man, you’re tight! Christ. You always were the best fuck around” the john said as he rammed himself into a drunken Spike in the back seat of his car.
“Take it, bitch…fuck that ass back on me. HARD” he screamed.
Spike grunted and moaned and did as he was told. She thinks I’m a whore. That’s exactly what I’ll be then. Take that you bitch, were Spike’s thoughts as the john slammed into him over and over until he finally finished spurting his load deep inside him. Spike was so drunk; he didn’t even realize the guy hadn’t used a condom.
He pulled out of him and smacked his ass.
“Get dressed man, and get in the front.” He ordered him.
Spike fumbled with his jeans but finally got them up and zipped. When he got in the front, the john shoved a few bills into his hands then drove off to take him back where he found him.
“Don’t be such a stranger” the john told him as he pulled up to the curb to drop him off.
“Yeah, see ya” Spike said and got out.
Spike walked a few blocks then found an alley. He sat down up against one of the walls and promptly passed out.

It had been three days and still no word from Spike. Buffy was beside herself with worry. Even Xr war was starting to get worried. He figured Spike would’ve at least called or talked to him or come and got some of his stuff while Buffy was at work but nothing. Xander promised Buffy he would go back out and try and find him.
Xander spent all night checking out his old part of town, asking people who knew Spike or might know him if they knew where he was now. Finally he found some doped out chick who heard about some guy who matched Spike’s description in a nearby slum building.
What Xander found made him sick and he had seen a lot of shit in his day. Spike was in some dirty room which looked like it was right out of a horror film. He smelled like he hadn’t bathed since he left Buffy’s. His clothes were caked in dirt and blood and semen. His jeans were down around his knees. His face was all beat up and he appeared to be unconscious. Apparently some drug dealer had found him in an alley and taken him back to his slum house and given him to a bunch of druggies to use as a toy. Xander knew without question that he had been repeatedly raped.
Thankfully, the other people there were so strung out; Xander was able to get Spike out of there relatively easy without getting killed himself.
He had to support him on his shoulders and basic dra drag him along.
“Come on buddy, stay with me” Xander said to him as they shuffled along.
He got them down to the street and a half a block away to a gas station where there was a pay phone. He knew of no other option so he called directory assistance.
A minute later he was dialing a phone number.
“Hello” the voice on the other line said.
“Umm…Mr. Giles? It’s Xander, Spike’s friend.” Xander said.
“Hello Xander. Is there something I can do for you?”
“Mr. Giles. I’ve got Spike with me right now and he is hurt pretty bad. I didn’t know who else to call. Can you come and get us, please?”
“Oh dear Lord. What about Buffy?” Giles asked.
“Buffy and Spike kinda had a big fight and Spike left and he was drinking and…he’s hurt real bad…I think he might need to go to the hospital.” Xander stammered.
“Where are you?” Giles asked.
“On the corner of 5th and Broad, the gas station there…please hurry.” Xander pleaded.
“I’ll be right there!” Giles hung up the phone and was out the door before the line could go cold. There was no way he was losing his son again, Giles thought as he broke speed limits and ran stop signs to get there.

Xander had been gone for a long time. Buffy was now worried about him on top of worrying about Spike. The phone rang bringing her out of her heavy thoughts.
“Hello”
“Buffy, it’s Xander.”
“Xander! Where are you? I was getting so worried. Did you find him?” she inquired.
“Yeah, Buffy. I found him. We’re at the hospital. Giles is here too.” Xander began.
“Why are you at the hospital? Is he O.K.? Xander? Xander? What’s wrong? “Buffy became hysterical.
“Buffy…Buffy…calm down. He is going to be alright but he was beat up pretty bad…the doctors said…”
“Which hospital are you at? I’ll be right down.” Buffy cut him off.
“University” Xander answered. “Buffy, before you come, you need to know….Buffy…they didn’t just beat him, whoever did this to him. He was raped too.” Xander sighed.
“Oh god!” Buffy cried. “Oh, Xander. It’s all my fault. I told him to leave.” She sobbed.
“No, Buffy. It’s not your fault.” Xander replied.
“I’m on my way. Don’t leave.” And she hung up the phone before he could respond.

Angel knew many people and many people knew him so it was only a matter of hours before word got back to him about what had happened to Spike and his condition and that he was hospitalized.
“Well, now…this makes it even easier for me. I’ll just slip into the hospital and off him there. No one will be the wiser” he thought.

A/N: Coming Soon: Chapter 15-Reconciliations and Revenge