What Was I Thinking!?!
Chapter 13
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Author’s Note: I apologize
for the long delay between updates. I was at the Oakland Convention then came
home to Hurricane
now.
“Spike, quit being such a
baby,” Buffy said after he had once again freaked about her driving. “It’s just
a little corn.”
“Yeah, and won’t somebody
notice there’s a huge chunk missing?” Spike said glancing behind him at the
large path she had left in their wake. Get out out of trouble with her father
was what had started this whole thing. Now, it only seemed to be getting worse.
She didn’t seem to notice or care about that bit of information.
“Hold on,” Buffy declared,
hitting the gas.
The truck lurched forward,
picking up momentum. Spike leaned forward to try and see what was going on. He
almost gasped when he saw the small ditch in front of them. She was going to
try and jump it. He couldn’t help as his hands flew to his face. There was no
way he was watching this wreck happen.
Every movement was f
tho
though and heard. The stalks protesting as they went down in front of them, the
bouncing of the truck, then finally his butt rose from the seat for a moment
before they landed. He slid to his left when the truck turned right. They were
on pavement again. His eyes flew open to see Buffy tearing down a road.
“Not going through anymore
of those, are you?”
“If I have to,” Buffy said.
Her eyes narrowed as she glanced over at him. “You really don’t trust me, do
you?”
“It’s not you, pet,” Spike
conciliated. “I do trust you with just about everything, but…” He glanced
behind them again, unconsciously shaking his head at the disaster they’d left
behind them.
“You’re being an asshole,”
Buffy sniffled. Her lower lrembrembled as she blinked back tears. “I got us out
of there and away from you getting the shit beaten out of you. And you’re being
all ungrateful and stuff.”
“Excuse me?” Spike squeaked.
“Me? Getting beaten? I can handle that git.”
“Oh, of course,” Buffy
sarcastically threw out. She turned another corner without slowing down. The
rear tires squealed as they tried to find purchase on the pavement. “You’re
just all Mr. Superman or something. Take on a whole frickin’ bar tRileRiley and
his cronies. Excuse me. Shall I find them again?” She muttered something else
under her breath.
“What was that?” Spike
demanded. “Go ahead and say it. You’ve insulted my masculinity real well up to
this point. Add a little more onto the fire.”
He ran his hand through his
hair while staring out the window. All he had wanted was a night with Buffy in
his arms. A little loving with the beautiful girl who made him feel like more
of a man than anyone else had in his life. She made him dream things he didn’t
want to dream about and now she was tearing them apart. Were all women this
traitorous? Let a man think he was everything then let him know he was nothing
but dirt under their feet.
The truck screeched to a
stop making him look up from his musings. They were parked under a large tree
on a back road somewhere. Maybe this was where they were supposed to meet the
others. He heard a sob and turned in astonishment to Buffy.
“Luv, what’s wrong?” Spike
asked, just like the fool for love that he was. He scooted closer to her but
she met him halfway. Her arms wound around his neck while she straddled him.
Buffy pressed her sweet lips to his with a desperation that sent chills down
his back. “Shush, its okay, Buffy, everything’s okay.”
“No, it’s not,” Buffy
hiccupped, still pressing quick kisses to his mouth. “I was so scared when
those horrid men were kicking you on the floor. You came to my rescue. I love
you,” She declared, meeting his lips with her own parted ones. Her tongue
darted into his mouth.
A groan rose unbidden deep
from within his throat at her invasion. Grasping her bottom he pulled her
forward while he slid down. There was a moment when they both froze as denim
met lace. His cock twitched in anticipation of getting free to only be taken
captive again by her warmth. She was where he wanted her. His hand moved up to
tangle in her hair so that he could reverse the kiss. He pushed her tongue back
into her mouth, tangling with it in a fevered battle that neither wanted to
end.
Spike felt bad for all his
earlier doubts about her. He pulled away for a second. She followed. Before her
lips met his again, he was able to whisper his vow to her, “I love you, too,
Buffy, with all of me.”
It was done. She stopped in
surprise for only a moment. She gave a happy sigh before her hands tangled in
his hair and her heat pressed down on him. She rocked against him over and over
again. The friction between them a raging fire that could only be quenched one
way. He reached under her skirt. His fingers drifted upwards along the
silkiness of her thighs until they tangled in the remains of her panties. With
one quick tug they were off.
“May I?” He whispered
raggedly as his fingers started to pop the buttons on his jeans. She was giving
rapid licks to his earlobe then venturing downwards. She didn’t answer one way
or another except to reach in the glove box to hand him a condom. He rolled it
on with one hand and with the other he helped to position her.
With a shake of her hair she
pulled back. She gavlonglong inhale then slowly sank down on him. Their
foreheads met as they came together. Her juices coated his cock giving him an
easier entrance into the tightness of her body.
“Need you so much,” Buffy
whispered, clutching his shoulders as she squirmed to take him deeper into her.
There wasn’t any way he
could fill her any more. She was stretched taut over him. It was the softest
velvet that he’d ever known. Buffy fulfilled his every fantasy from early
puberty on. He held her still for a moment, trying to ignore her whimper of
desperation, until he knew for sure that he wouldn’t come right then.
“Hold on, Luv,” Spike
pleaded, when he felt her quiver. “You feel so damn good…I need a second.”
“A second is too long,”
Buffy replied, caressing his face with the barest touch of her fingertips.
“Wish I could always be like this with you.”
“Me too, baby, me too.”
Using his heels he pushed
into her feeling the stretch her body made to accommodate his girth.
small being making him smile in manly arrogance. Taking the cue she began to ride
him. Slow at first as she learned the rhythm, drawing out every ripple against
him, driving him slowly mad. Her eyes sparkled as she stared into his eyes
almost unblinking. Their breath mingled as they panted out their desire. Her
hands pressed against the roof of the truck as she threw her head back. The new
angle brought him against her cervix with each downward thrust she made.
Her hair danced in the
moonlight, curtaining him from the outside world. He was entranced; deeply
drawn into her seductive spell that wound around him without mercy. His hands
floated along her thighs, tangling in the hem of her dress, pulling it up so he
could trace the softness of her belly. Her breath hitched as his fingertips
traveled along her rib cage. Barely audible mewls fell like rain from her kiss
swollen lips fueling his exploration.
Buffy arched her breasts
forward, begging for his attention. He quickly popped the buttons on her dress,
pulling her forward so that he could bury his face between the soft mounds. He
inhaled the soft flowery scent she wore mingled with the earthy musk of her
flesh. It filled him with an urgent need to make this woman his. He shivered
under the emotions that filled him. She flowed around and through his senses
until there was nothing left but her.
He tasted the dew drops of
sweat that dripped between her breasts. He bit the side of one then suckled the
mark he left. She reached between them, popping open her bra, directing him the
pebbled tip.
Wanting only to please her,
he latched onto her nipple, suckling it deep into this mouth. She kissed his
cheek, murmuring pleasured sounds into his ear as his tongue ran small circles
around her areola. Her hips increased their speed against him. The sound of
their bodies meeting mingled with the squeaking of the upholstery. A symphony
that was only enhanced by their increasing moans as they became lost to the
power of their lovemaking.
“Love you,” Spike muttered,
breaking away from her breast. He couldn’t breath. He couldn’t think. His
entire being was narrowiown own to the sensation of his cock moving within her.
His hips lifted to grind against her when she came down. Holding onto her ass,
he held onto her, keeping the thrusts between them, short and rapid.
Buffy was sucking on his
neck as she squeezed his cock within her walls. He rotated his hips below hers,
creating a new sensation that made her shake against him. Suddenly, her head
flew back and a low keening sound ripped through the air. He grinned at the
wild sound she made. Her body tensed and he slid his thumb between her folds to
press against her clit.
“Oh, shit, Spike,” Buffy
screamed, as she came then fell limply against him.
“Come on, baby,” Spike said,
turning to lay her on the seat. It took a moment to nge nge them before he
could thrust properly into her still quaking cunt. Her legs wrapped around him
and she planted her hands flat against the door. The tip of his tongue slipped
between his lips in concentration as he pounded into her. “Oh, sweet Jesus,
Buffy, so hot, so good, make me feel it….that’s it…fuck me back, pet. Squeeze
me with everything you’ve got…just like that…oh yeah, do it again. Oh, merciful
heavens…shit.” He shouted, throwing his head back as he came deep within her.
He collapsed on top of her
with a chuckle.
“What’s so funny?” Buffy
asked tiredly. Her hands stroked his back in long gestures that made him feel
safe as he came down from the best orgasm of his life.
“You…us…it’s the best,”
Spike said, kissing her shoulder. “Love you more every second.”
“Love you, too,” Buffy
whispered. Her eyelashes fluttered against his cheek and he rose up on his
elbows.
“Sorry, didn’t mean to be
squashing you.”
<
“You weren’t.”
Their bodies were separating
whether he wanted them to ot. Ht. His softened cock was slipping out of her and
he hated it. It was cold without her so close to him. But it wnevinevitable so
he maneuvered to a sit pos position. The condom was tossed out of the window
before he pulled his jeans back over his hips. Buffy was tugging her own
clothes back together. This wasn’t right. He hated this clandestine fucking
they were doing. He wanted to pull a blanket over their naked bodies and sleep
with her against him.
He sighed.
“What’s wrong?” Buffy asked,
buttoning her dress.
“This,” Spike muttered,
waving a hand around. “I wish there was somewhere I could take you so we could
really be together.” He reached over to pull her against him. He kissed her
quickly. “Make love to you for hours, sleep for a while then make love to you
with the sun shining in the room.”
“It’s never going to happen
for us,” Buffy whispered softly. “You’re leaving for LA in a couple of days
then I’ll be heading for
this summer. This is all we’ll ever have.”
“I thought you loved me,”
Spike said, pulliway.way. He backed into the corner of the truck, rummaging for
his cigarettes. He needed the nicotine. “I thought this meant something to you.
Bloody hell, I just told you I love you. I wasn’t playing.”
“I do love you,” Buffy insisted,
wrapping hrms rms around herself. “I meant everything but I can’t just walk
away from my dreams…it’s the only thing…”
“That matters to you,” Spike
snarled. “You can be a cold hearted bitch, Buffy.”
“I have to be,” Buffy
snapped. “Nobody else has ever taken care of me. You’ve known me for three
days. Are you ready to walk away from your life to follow me to
your little woman? Do you really think we’ll be together fifty years from now?
Love doesn’t last.”
“Mine does,” Spike replied,
starting the truck.
It was Drusilla all over
again. She loved him but not enough to keep her from straying. From seeking her
pleasures elsewhere no matter how much it hurt him.feltfelt like he was on a
rr cor coaster ride. Buffy loved him. He knew it. Could feel it in the way she
touched him. He took a deep breath and told himself that she was just scared.
Everyone else had let her down so in her mind inevitably he would too. He just
had to find a way to prove it to her. To make her see that they were meant to
be.
“Come here, Luv,” Spike
said, putting his arm on the back of the seat. “I do love you. I’m a wanker for
being mean. And I know you love me.” She scooted next to his side, laying her
head on his shoulder. He kissed her brow. “Maybe
“I don’t want you to…”
“I’ll make my own decisions,
thank you, ma’am.”
“You’re an idiot,” Buffy
whispered, reaching behind her to pull his arm around her shoulders. “But a
lovable idiot that makes me very happy.”
“See, two peas in a pod,”
Spike joked. “You’re a lovable bitch that makes me happy.”
She laughed. Both
comfortable with just being with each other, they remained silent as he drove
toward her house. His mind filled with plans of the future. There hadn’t been
any hardcore life goals for him yet. He had come to
seemed like the place for him to be, but he didn’t think he’d be heartbroken to
leat bet behind. He just knew he’d be heartbroken if Buffy wasn’t beside him
wherever he was.
Her house was just up ahead
and he slowed the truck down.
“Keep driving, Spike,” Buffy
suddenly urged, pressing down on his leg.
“What? Why?” Spike looked
over at her then saw what was upsetting her.
Her father’s patrol car sat
in the driveway.
“I can’t do it anymore,”
Buffy whispered. “I can’t go from being so happy with you to being made
miserable for being alive. Being told how wrong I am for wanting you. I just
can’t,” she sobbed, burying her face against his side.
It was time to start proving
his love.
He kept driving.