Tough Love

Chapter 12: You could make a killing

So strange, how he’d slipped into her heart without letting her know. He was a clever man her Spike, using clever words, but also who knew when to stop, let them sink in and take their course. Making her believe it was all just fun and games, but in the meantime staking his claim to her soul, entering her thoughts, burning himself into her mind. Knowing that when he got what he was after, her heart would never rest, would always want him close.

She was becoming addicted to his presence, and with every minute it became harder to let him go.

Could that be how he felt the about boxing, about fighting? What made him believe he was going to win if fate wasn't on his side?

"I like to look at the facts"

Stupid blond guy…

***


The hall was crowded and smoky, as to be expected and the noise echoed in his ears like never before. Although every yell, every cheer, became dim compared to the sharp pain in the back of his skull, but that wasn't the only pain he felt. Every inch of his body ached. He use to be indifferent to any sort of physical pain, but now…he just wanted the flaming waves to stop, he just wanted to let his body rest, maybe because somewhere in the back of his mind he believed he had already found peace.


"Yeah luv…I believe in fate"


Stupid words, just words they were. He took a deep breath and gazed at his rival sitting across the ring…like the poems I used to write, he said to himself. Actions spoke louder then words, and in life, every time he needed to be heard his fists never let him down, they talked loud and clear. On the other hand his words always were something to be mocked.

"Spike…Spike you hearing me?" Hank waved in front of him, while splashing drops of water over his face, talking as loudly as possible.

"You’re doing fine, son….keep your pecker up."

Spike seemed to regain focus and gave Hank a puzzled glare.

"What?" Hank frowned. "Heard you say it to Gunn"

"I was referring to something entirely different." Spike smiled lightly and glanced down.

"Yeah….I don't think Combs would appreciate that." Hank put his hand on his shoulder as both of them laughed, breaking the tension.

"One more round, you're doing just fine." Hank’s tone turned serious.

"How bad do I look?" Spike asked while taking a sip from his water.

"Let's just say you’re better off without a mirror."

The bell rang and they both glanced at each other. Spike got up ready for action, taking wary steps to the center of the ring.

"Keep your chin up Spike."

Spike heard Hank's yell through the voices of the crowd, but he didn't glance back, all that was important was the man in front of him, the man he was going to fight, the man he was going to defeat even if it cost him a head injury. Or even his life. Nothing was more important.

"How do you like the taste of blood Spike?" Combs asked as they circled the ring, watching each other movements.

"Suits me just fine," Spike muttered.

"Good." Combs lashed out at him, sending him a few swings, not giving him a chance to escape, he finally made contact with his face.

Spike fell back, but managed to keep his balance. Still on his feet he ducked Combs’ attempt to punch him again.

The hall filled with loud voices, yelling "come on, hit him"…"knock him down"…"what the fuck are you waiting for?, But just one word echoed in his mind - kill, kill, kill. He knew they wanted blood, they wanted more of his blood, Combs had already taken some pretty bad shots at him in the last round, and he was determined not to let it happen again.



He ducked Combs again quickly and started punching him, thanking his luck he was faster and smaller then his heavy rival.

"Yeah Spike." He heard Hank yell while he was sending Combs punch after punch, not blinking, not even breathing, he just gave in to his feral instincts and didn't stop, not until he was pushed back panting and frazzled. Combs didn't wait for him to recover and hit him again and again, until he fell to the floor.

Like a wounded animal, Spike tried to get up on but his weak legs failed him, he glanced towards the cheering crowed and through the haze of his agony tried to find a reason to go on and avoid the noises at the same time. Using his hands he lifted himself up, and steadied his quivering body, but just as he felt strong enough to continue, he fell back again, this time not from his rival’s blows but from sight in front of him that had almost the same effect.

"Buffy."



She was standing beside the ring, staring right at him, her stare so focused and intense, he couldn't have missed it, not even if there were more than a thousand people in the room, not even if they were naked. Buffy. .Her name slipped out of his mouth as a sigh, and that's when he was literally knocked to the ground.

"Oh God, Spike." Hank gazed down at the blond who was lying on the ground. He wasn't moving and Hank got quickly inside the ring and knelt next to him as questioning sounds came from the crowd. A mixture of excitement and confusion filled the air.

"Spike!" Hank gazed up and saw Buffy next to him.

"Spike…wake up!" she ran her hand over Spike's hair and shook him slightly.


"What wrong with him dad?" she gazed at Hank terrified.

"Move away please" A man her grabbed her arm.

"No wait-" she tried to push them away but she was pulled back.

Hank stood beside her and stopped her from approaching.

"What's wrong with him? Is he breathing? Is it his heart?" she asked glancing between the paramedic and her dad.

"Honey relax" Hank stroked her arm.

"Don't tell me to relax! .This is all your fault!"

"He's okay," they heard the paramedic say as he curved his neck towards them. "He's coming out of it," the medic stated calmly. "Need to take him back." Another man came and they lifted him up.

"Where do you think you're going?" Hank grabbed Buffy's arm.

"Where do you think?" she said harshly, glaring at him.

"No, no, no young lady…they going to take care of him, there's nothing you can do…just wait patiently Buffy."

"I can't believe you!" Buffy yelled into his face. "You knew he was going to get seriously injured and you still let him do it….is that what you wanted for me? Watching anther person I care about getting hurt?...Is that's why you approved this relationship?"

"Buffy what are you-?"

"I want to know why. Why did you asked me to come here?" she said in a strangled voice.

Hank didn't know what to say, Buffy stared at his face and paused for a few seconds.

"Y-You wanted this to happen…didn't you? Me and Spike?" Realization dawned on her.

"I was hoping, but I didn't think you'd be falling for him so fast really." Hank smiled inwardly. "Kinda reminded me of me and your mom, at the begining anyway."

"Spike is nothing like you," Buffy blurted out, but quickly regretted her words, gazing down ashamed.

"No, he isn't." Hank searched her eyes. "He's stronger." Hank sighed and added.

"And he’s never going to run away."

"I guess that's a Summers thing." Buffy calmed down and smiled at him slightly.

"Come here Buffy." Hank opened his arms to her.

"Christmas is coming soon," he said as he hugged her. Feeling that she wasn’t fighting his closeness, he tightened his grip around her. "We really should buy a tree."

"Yeah." Buffy closed her eyes and let her head fall onto his shoulder.

"I’ll let you and Spike choose," Hank said in her ear and heard her sigh.

***


Buffy entered the room and saw Spike, his face all swollen and bruised, his body bent, and it looked like the only thing keeping him from falling to the ground were his two trembling hands holding the bed on both sides of his body.

"Can I?" she took the gauze from the man before her without giving him a chance to answer and approached the wounded boxer gravely.

When she was close enough she notice he was gazing at her intently and she blinked at the sight of him. He was torn - it almost brought tears to her eyes, but she couldn't show him his effect on her so she quickly took the gauze and pressed it to his bruised lip.

Hard.

"Bloody hell" Spike yelped.



"Now you’re being a baby?" Buffy frowned.

"It stings." he narrowed his eyes at her.

"Good" she muttered and resumed nursing him.

Pressing the gauze to his face she watched him flinch again.



"Here I thought you'd be comfortable covered with all your sexy wounds" she teased.

"Yeah…I feel very sexy…" Spike shrugged, face falling.

Buffy sighed and dropped her hand gazing at him, he seemed ashamed letting her see him like that, as if he was trying to process words fitting to that moment.

"Thought you wouldn't come to watch me kill myself." He repeated her words and gazed away.

"I've changed my mind."

"Why?"

"Get your ass back to L.A before I fly it there."


Buffy remembered her redheaded friend’s words. She really became an assertive person. Since when did Willow hold so much power? Who knew?


"I realized that by watching, I'm actually helping you not kill yourself."

"By sending a stare that knocked me off my feet?" Spike gazed into her eyes.

"It's my special skill." A slow grin spread across her face.

"Then maybe you should have aimed your pretty eyes at Combs?"

"Sure you would have wanted that?" she asked with a leer.

"Buffy" Spike gasped watching her close the gap between them, parting her lips and staring at him.

Buffy watched his eyes light up as she breathed onto his face.

"I would have stopped you from fighting, you know, .if you haven't beaten me to it."

"Think you have that much power over me, pet?" he whispered.

Buffy gave him a wicked smile.


"You know I do." She kissed him softly, letting her lips linger on his mouth.

"Are we alright then?" Spike broke the kiss.

"I don't know…are we?" she asked indecisively, pulling back.

"You ran away," he scolded her.

"I did."

"Are you planning on doing that a lot?"

"No," she pouted.

"Good" Spike gave her a hard stare, "because I'm not going to let you play me, I've got my pride, you know."

"I'm sorry," Buffy said in a low voice, staring at him with puppy-dog eyes.

"Let's get out of here." Spike got slowly to his feet, knowing that he couldn’t continue this conversation with people watching.

"Where do you two think you're going?" Hank caught them in the hallway.

"Home," Spike said and continued walking wearily with Buffy under his arm holding him.

"Okay, but take this." Hank handed him a bottle of pain killers.

"Thanks dad." Buffy took it from him and gave him a slow smile.

"Yeah, thanks Hank." Spike lowered his gaze, feeling ashamed for not keeping his word.

"I'm proud of you son," Hank muttered and turned away.

"Let's go." Buffy gazed at Spike’s stunned face, and knew she needed to distract him from thinking about the fight. Spike nodded and continued walking down the hall.


A crowed of people were standing near the exit, and not so far from them a man was leaning against the wall, surrounded by smoke from his cigarette.

"Nice show Spiky."

Spike recognized the voice from the day before; he quickly turned to face him.

"Angel." Buffy was surprised to see him and more so when she saw Spike approach him angrily.

"No Spike." She held him back.

"Now you've got a woman to carry you, what's next Willy? Send her to fight for you?"

"Spike," Buffy murmured gazing into his face. "Don't listen to him."

Spike gave Angel a sharp glance and turned away, letting Buffy lead.

"That's right, go bleached boy." Angel watched them leaving and added, "hey Buff! if ever want a real man, you know where to find me."

Buffy gazed at him sideways and muttered.

"There's nothing real about you Angel."

***


Spike's place was trashed and cold. Buffy wanted to help him get inside, but as they walked up the stairs he’d already told her he was fine by himself. He hadn't said a word all the way back and she thought maybe he didn't wanted to talk in the cab, or maybe he was embarrassed because after all, no man takes defeat lightly. .And certainly not Spike. Not after everything she’d learned about him. He was a proud man, mostly because he felt so vulnerable in the world, but if only he knew the power he held inside, the power he held with his words. If only she could let him know.

They stood in the middle of the living room in silence and squinted at each other, not sure what to say, not sure how to begin.

"You should rest." Buffy watched him struggling to stand straight.

"Buffy." Spike paused as if he was about to say something important.

"We can talk later Spike." She reached to hold his shoulder, but he grabbed her hand and gazed at her face.

"I've missed you."

Buffy brought her hand slowly to his face and cupped his cheek.


"I wasn't gone so long." she smiled at him softly.


"I thought-…god I'm such a git." He stopped himself, looking away.

Buffy took his hand. "Come here" She turned her back to
the bedroom and pulled his hand not taking her eyes from him. "There's something I want to show you," she said quietly.

"Luv?" Spike asked inaudibly, but still followed.

"Don't worry Spike," Buffy smirked. "I'm not planning on hurting you….much." She repeated his words with an amused tone.

"You remember every single thing I say to you?" Spike watched her as she stood at the edge of his bed.



"Just the dirty stuff," Buffy joked.

"You like the dirty stuff huh?" Spike wiggled his eyebrow" Y- you little min-"

"Shut up Spike and lie down," Buffy groused impatiently.

"Alright…. bossy chit." Spike murmured and lay on the bed.



Feeling the soft mattress beneath him, Spike couldn’t help sighing in relief. He wasn't aware of the pain he'd been repressing. His bones felt heavy as bricks and every breath he took made him feel a sharp stinging in his chest.


Buffy took off his shoes and crawled up his body to look at him. She shuddered at the sight of his bruised face, but the thought of the rest of his wounded body hadn't crossed her mind until that moment. She slowly began taking off his shirt, glancing briefly at his face.

Spike just watched her silently, amazed by the tenderness she was showing him.


Is this what you wanted to show my? My angel…

Alarmed, Buffy peeled away his shirt, revealing his pale skin. She gazed at his chest and ran her hand slowly along his black and blue bruises, causing him to flinch uncomfortably on the bed.

She pulled back and gazed at him, his eyes were closed, but it looked as if he was about to say something. She didn't wait to hear him and leaned to shower his chest with light kisses.

Pulling down, she lingered on his navel while her hands started pushing down his pants.

"Buffy." Spike gasped as if her touch caused him more pain then he was already feeling.

Buffy gazed up to meet his eyes.

"Missed you so bloody much," he said in a low voice and watched her as she smiled and pulled the rest of his shorts off.

Buffy pulled her dress over her head and threw it on the side of the bed.

"My beautiful angel," Spike murmured as she paused to gaze at him right before resuming kissing his chest.

Spike wanted to watch her body move, touch her, worship her, but he couldn't move, he was weak and besides Buffy's kisses and caress felt too damn good.

"Does that hurt?" Buffy leaned across his body and kissed his neck, her arms closing around him.

"No," he lied conflicted by the feeling of pleasure and pain.

Nestling onto his lap, Buffy continue kissing him, brushing her lips over his delicate skin and moving her hand down his stomach.

"Buffy," Spike breathed over her face right before she moved down to his thigh, her hands resting on each side of his body.

"I need-" he panted feeling her thighs brushing against him.

"What do you need?" Buffy whispered and tugged on his boxers.

"Bourbon" Spike replied.

"Bourbon?" Buffy gazed at him bemused.

"T-there's a bottle… at the side of the bed," he said stuttering, gazing away, trying to control the pain that washed over him.



"O-okay" Buffy reached her hand and brought him the bottle.

"Only because you're hurt." she said sitting on his lap.



"It’s for medical reasons only luv," he grinned.

"Whatever," she pouted, feeling a bit disappointed and watching him hold the flask in his hand as he paused to look at her.

"Well?" Buffy grumbled. "Aren't you gonna drink it?"

Spike gazed at the bottle in his hand for a moment and then tossed it aside.



"Come here." he pulled her to rest beside him.

"There's something I want to tell you," he said quietly glaring at her face and pausing.

"What is it?" she asked curiously, watching him closely.

Spike took his time thinking carefully about what he was about to say.

"So," Buffy urged him on.

"Umm…" he mumbled.

"Spike?"

"God woman! Don't rush me."

"It's kinda hard looking at your face right now," Buffy replied cannily.

"Fine…Forget it," he groused and turned his back at her.

Buffy sighed, men can be such babies

She spooned herself behind him, resting her chin on his shoulder.

"What did you want to tell me?" she said huskily, stroking his arm.

"You're an irritating little bitch, Summers," Spike muttered under his breath and closed his eyes.

"That's what you wanted to tell me?" she raised her head angrily, waiting for his response.

She squinted at him and saw he wasn't even trying to look at her.


Is he ignoring me?

Baby…



She waited a minute and then brought her hand in front of his face. When she saw he wasn't even blinking she realized he’d probably fallen asleep. Exhausted, she thought and no wonder considering.

She leaned back onto the mattress and decided she should probably rest her eyes as well. She had, after all, had a long drive and no rest at all the last two days…


She turned onto her side and gazed at his neck.


Gorgeous neck…like the rest of him… Sleepy Gorgeous Spike…


"I love you."

"What?" Sahe was taken back by the low murmur in her ear, her wide eyes still fixed on his neck.

"You bloody well heard me," Spike mumbled wearily into the pillow.

A few seconds passed by and then Spike groused.

"Well… aren't you gonna say something?"

"Willow was right," Buffy muttered coming to her senses.

"Willow?" Spike turn to look at her.

Buffy gazed at Spike's eyes mesmerized by the intensity of his stare, knowing that even at that moment when he was weak and beaten, he could have won her heart all over again with just one glance.

"Right before I left… she said I don't have a home in Sunnydale anymore." Buffy looked down.

"That's a bit harsh." Spike pushed back a lock of hair from her face and watched her attentively.


"It true…'cause now I have a home…with dad…A-and you," she murmured bashfully and gazed up to meet his stare.

"That's how you feel pet?"

"Yeah…and I-" Buffy paused breathing deeply, feeling how the room had suddenly become extremely quiet.

Looking at her puzzled face Spike decided not to wait for her words and leaned over to kiss her gently.

"Not gonna let me finish?" Buffy broke the kiss.

"I’d rather move to the many climaxes part," he smirked.

"You're changing the rules?" Buffy asked playfully.

"Rebel here, normal rules do not apply," Spike said huskily and stroked his hand along her thigh. "If anything, they were made to be broken." He wiggled an eyebrow.

"You’re so full of it."


"I am pet, but just be gentle with it." He gave her a peck on the lips.

"Hopeless," Buffy said short of breath, feeling his hand working his magic on her.

"You know it," Spike whispered and captured her lips again, feeling her moaning into his mouth, knowing her sigh meant -

I Love you.



******************************************************************
One year later…

It was late at the evening and Buffy tossed and turned on the bed, trying to find a comfortable position she could sleep in. "Guh stop it" she grumbled under her breath and turned onto her back to gaze at the ceiling. "Why are you always doing it when he's away?" she ran her hand over her stomach. "Umm?" she murmured as if she was expecting an answer. "Mommy made daddy go to AA meeting with grandpa because daddy has a bad habit he need to take care of." She then turned onto her side and settled slowly onto the bed. "And if mommy doesn’t get some sleep she's gonna pick up some bad habits of her own," she said wearily and looked at the clock next to the bed.


Buffy took her eyes from the clock as she heard a noise at the door. "Thank God," she sighed in relief, and got up.


"Hi big mama." Spike walked in the living room.



"It's almost eleven."

"I know…sorry luv." Spike approached her with a smile on his face and she noticed his hand behind his back.

"I know that face, what did you do?"

"Nothing" he said innocently. "How's Billy?" he looked at her belly.

"It's Lizzy and she's kicking," she said as he reached his hand to caress her stomach.



"Can't blame me ...must have learn that from her mom" he wink at her.

"You're too happy, did they sink in booze at the AA meeting?"

Spike face fell. "Do I really need to go? That was bloody terrible."

"I wanted you to know what to expect if you keep drinking."

"I think I've learned my lesson."

"Good, now what did you bring me?" Buffy tried to look behind his back.

"Who said it's for you" Spike teased.

"Come on," Buffy pouted trying to look behind his back as he tried to hide the bag from her.

Buffy finally snapped at him when he kept hiding it.

"If you don't show me what's in the bag I'm gonna kick your ass."

Spike smirked at that.

"I just offered a kid some candy didn't I?" Buffy said glaring at his smug face.

"More like asked him to go trick or treating," Spike replied, amused, and opened the bag and brought the box in front of her face.

"Yay my favorites" Buffy said as she unwrapped the box quickly.

Spike watched her face light up and a warm feeling washed over him, like her smile always did.

"Can I have some? Didn't eat dinner," he asked playfully.

"Get your own." Buffy shrugged and put a cookie in her mouth.

"No boxing, no drinking, no smoking and now no cookies?" Spike pouted.

"It's not my fault you preferred knocking me up then knocking people unconscious."

"Very funny…"Spike knelt in front of her and touched her stomach. "You hear that Billy? Don't have your mom’s sense of humor."

"It's Lizzy" Buffy muttered, chewing the cookie.

Spike gaze up to her.


"We'll see," he said smiling, feeling happy then he'd ever been.



THE END.



*A/N –Thanks for reading :-))