Needed

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters or the setting of the story. All things I borrowed from the Buffyverse are a creation of and belong to Joss Whedon.

Timeline: more than 9years after NFA ("Angel"), 10 after "Chosen" (BtVS)

Rachael, thanks for giving me the confidence to post this chapter!



Chapter 11

Wesley put on the few gadgets he had managed to manufacture since his resurrection. The retractable blade and spike were hidden in their sheaths. He buttoned up his shirt and went into the main office. The salamander case was on the desk just as he had left it. He took the crossbow off the wall and placed it neatly next to the case.

He settled in his chair and picked at random one of the books on the desk. He opened it, trying to lose himself in it, wishing to forget about the impending battle, needing to forget about the new situation with Faith. He could feel he was not going to make it back alive, so there was no point in trying to figure out what she meant to him. He kept his eyes firmly set on the pages, denying the urge to look at the chair across the desk from him, the chair where Alex usually sat. His son... Or as close to a son as he would ever get.

"That must be some book," Faith said, sounding amused. "Watcha readin'?" she asked, flopping into Alex's chair.

"What?"

He realized he had no idea what he had been reading. When he looked at Faith, he saw Faith smiling. Spike must be all right, he assumed. He felt again a sting of jealousy. He shook it off. He was not going to waste any energy feeling envious of a relationship the likes of which he had never had, nor was he ever going to cultivate, even if he had a future in which to do so.

"Spike's almost there. We should get going as soon as the girls are done," she said.

His first reaction was to say that they should wait for the information, and then leave, but time was of the essence. They could get the information on route just as well. They were all in contact. They had checked the earpieces, the link, the channels on which they could transmit, collectively and individually. Vive la technologie!

Besides, the sooner they got there, the better chance Spike had to survive. He was surprised of that last thought. Collateral damage, casualty of war, dying for a good cause, expendable... He wondered where had those sane concepts gone. He was concerned about the fate of a vampire now? They must have brought him back wrong. An almost imperceptible smile tugged at the corner of his mouth as he nodded to Faith.


.........................................

In the car, Wesley repeated, at popular demand, the procedure of placing the salamander in the cave and activating it.

"The salamander should be placed at the focal point of the magic leak. This point can be situated anywhere inside the cave. We can assume that it is situated where the illusions are more intense. The coming darkness will probably throw everything it's got to dissuade the carrier of the salamander."

"How will it know what we have in the case?" Grace asked.

"It has the ability to scan at least the mind of anyone who enters the cave," Wesley said, omitting again to tell them how he knew that. "It will know the reason for the intrusion and it will also know everything about the past and mental wiring of the intruder. It can probably manifest anything it glimpses in our mind that could distract, stop or hurt."

He watched Faith with the corner of his eye. She seemed intent on the road ahead and had not flinched at the mention of the mind scan.

"Sounds messy. We're gonna hold the line outside the cave until you get it done," Eliana said.

"We should leave the car," Faith said interrupting the conversation. "The road narrows from here."

Wesley pulled over, gave the salamander case to Miranda, slung the crossbow on his back and followed Faith into the woods.

He glanced at his wristwatch. It was barely past midnight. If they got there before dawn, the battle was going to be vicious. He almost did not want to hear from Spike exactly how high were stacked the odds against them. A wide range telepathic calling from a powerful entity could have gotten a staggering number of responses.


..............................

About an hour later, Spike's whispered voice sounded in their ears.

"You should call for backup. There are over two hundred vampires here. And that's just the ones I can feel. More can be on their way even as we speak. Don't come here alone. Call whoever it takes. Call the sodding Watchers' Council if you have to."

Wesley watched Faith's reaction. She wasn't worried. That meant Spike's cover was still intact. Maybe he wasn't quite as legendary as they had all thought. Wesley motioned to his companions to remain quiet.

"All right, Spike. Get back now. When you can talk without being observed, tell us about their location. We can sketch a plan of attack before the cavalry gets here."

"OK," Spike said and broke the connection.

"Why didn't you tell him? You want to go back home?" Eliana asked.

"No point in going back. If so many vampires have already gathered, it means the perpetual darkness is imminent. Spike shouldn't know how close we are because he would worry and the others would be able to smell it. That would be as good as painting a target on his chest," Wesley explained. "How far are we from the cave?" he asked Faith.

Faith didn't answer right away. She was looking at him with an expression that, in the dimness of the night, he thought showed admiration? affection? trust? No time for that sort of questions, he chided himself. No thinking about Faith's feelings for him, if there were any real ones.

"A couple more hours at least."

Dammit, Wesley thought. They would still be there before daybreak. Two hundred vampires against four Slayers, and, with luck, a Master vampire. He did not count himself among the fighters. His job was to sneak inside the cave, not mow vamps.

"We're going to have to set up a diversion. As soon as Spike gives us details about their position. They're likely to have sentinels posted. With their senses, the can probably notice us long before we're aware of them."

He saw the scared looks and he went on hurriedly.

"However, the spells of confusion still work, and since they're more susceptible to magic than you are, that won't count for much. We can assume they cannot communicate with each other as easily as us..."

"Why not?" Eliana asked.

"They're probably not organized. They were all called, but they don't know each other."

"So we can take them out if we encounter smaller groups," Eliana said.

"We have to take out every vampire we encounter, so no one can get back and sound the alarm."

"Aren't they going to know something's wrong if the sentinels don't report?"

"With a little luck, they're going to be taken in by the diversion."

"If everything goes smoothly, they fall for the diversion, we give you enough time to place the salamander, then what? We still have about two hundred vamps to deal with, right? Maybe we should've called for backup," Grace said.

"If everything goes smoothly, the sun would be up by then, and the vamps aren't going to be much trouble" Wesley said.

"And Spike?" Miranda asked.

Good question, Wesley thought. We still have the salamander case to carry his ashes, his dark sense of humor suggested.

"We'll find a way," Faith said determinately.

She had been so quiet that Wesley was beginning to worry, about her determination to put an end to the magic in the cave, about Spike's safety. When she spoke, Wesley thought he could almost feel the bond between her and her vampire.

Wesley remembered Spike's words. 'Faith and I... we took care of one another for ten years. Kept each other out of trouble, had a few close calls, but always managed to pull through. As long as we were together.'

They would find a way out. They obviously had before. Spike had bonded Faith to him, gave up part of his strength for her. How far would she go for him? Wesley shook his head. That was not going to be his problem. He would be resting in peace by then. In peace or in hell.

They all heard Spike's voice at the same time.

"You have the map in front of you?" Spike asked.

"Yes," Wesley answered promptly. He had the map clear in his mind, and probably so did Faith.

"There's a large group stationed right outside the cave. More than a hundred, I think. Then there are a few patrols roaming the mountain. The fucking spells are messing with my head! I could've sworn they were west from here, but I'm going east – at least I think I'm going east – back the way I came and I almost ran into one. Oh, fuck!"

The last exclamation was followed by several indistinct noises and a long series of colorful curses from Spike.

"What happened?" the girls asked in one breath.

Wesley caught his foot in the root of tree as he studied Faith's reaction. She caught him and steadied him instinctively. She wasn't worried.

"I fell," Spike's voice came back.

"Ever the graceful vampire," Grace said, her tone filled with relief.

"Brat," Spike commented.

Wesley slowed down his pace, and switched to a private channel and addressed only Faith.

"Can you locate him?"

"Usually," she answered. "I'll try."

Wesley watched Faith in the silvery moonlight. She stood perfectly still, and closed her eyes. She was so beautiful. Yes, this was the perfect time for that observation!

"Damn!" she exclaimed. "He's moving away from us. He got lost."

"Can he focus on you and come toward us?" Wesley asked, already guessing the answer.

"Probably. He's gonna be pissed that you lied to him," Faith said.

"A risk I'm willing to take. Tell him to come toward you."

Faith nodded and hurried forward, leaving Wesley alone. He didn't hear the conversation between Spike and her, but the vampire soon addressed him on a private channel.

"You bastard son of a bitch! I'm gonna beat the crap out of you for this. I'm gonna hang you from your lying tongue. I'm gonna bleed you for days. They'll find pieces of you for weeks. What kind of man are you to risk their lives like this? Cocksucking motherfucking piece of shit!"
Another good question. What kind of man was he, to lead four young women to their death? Yes, he hoped that they were going to survive, but that didn't count for shit when he was marshaling them in a fight where the forces were so severely mismatched.

Using the common frequency, Wesley shared his scheme for the diversion with the rest of the group. He asked Grace and Eliana to deliver the 'smoke and mirrors' to the western side of the cave. Once the explosives and the glamours-in-a-box he had ordered on eBad were set, they should double back in a wide arch, avoiding the vamps as much as they could. Faith, Miranda and hopefully Spike, were going to stay put on the south of the cave, poised to move toward the vampires who remained to guard the entrance to the cave, leaving Wesley free to slip by them from the south-east.

Wesley shuddered thinking about the lucky timing the plan needed in order to work. He had been alive for about three weeks, and this was the best he could come up with? If he had found out about the imminence of the danger maybe he... No. Too late now. They had to make it work.


.................................

Spike caught up with them around 2a.m. Wesley was grateful for the darkness, because the look in Spike's eyes was the last thing he wanted to see.

...............................

Less than an hour till sunrise.

The glamours came to life in the distance. Grace and Eliana made contact while they were trying to make their way back as far from the multitude of vampires who were rushing toward the fake attack.

Faith, Spike and Miranda engaged the remaining vamps, maneuvering them away from the cave entrance.

Wesley advanced like a shadow toward the entrance. He did not look back. He was already heavily ridden with guilt and desperation. He steeled himself for the worse. The mind scan was going to find his weak spots. His only defense was going to be self awareness. Nothing inside the cave was real.


..............................

As soon as he stepped in, the entrance disappeared. The first figure he saw was Faith. Seventeen years old Faith, wearing the pink dress the Mayor had given her. Faith, apparently innocent. Faith, eager to be accepted, loved, taught.

"Is this the best you could come up with?" Wesley said with a bitter laughter.

Faith walked came near him. Wesley expected her to attack him, to grab the case, to stab him, to slap him. He was too tense. When she reached out and touched his face with the tips of her fingers, he startled embarrassingly.

He saw her lips tremble. He saw her trying to form words. He saw her fighting to understand what she was feeling.

"Yes, Faith. You could have been a good girl. You deserved more from me."

The only way to defend himself against the illusions was to acknowledge them. The illusion was damn near perfect. It was, after all, created from his own perception, his own memories. When the two small tears slid from her eyes, Wesley was in danger of losing it. The need to drop the case and put his arms around her, the urge to cup her face and wipe the tears with his thumbs almost overtook his reason.

"But that was a long time ago, and it cannot be changed, even if you were her. You are not."

She did not disappear in a puff of smoke. She only looked hurt, and withdrew her hands from his face.

Wesley walked away from her, the effort of not turning his head to look at her draining him.

He was wondering why the cave itself hadn't changed into a particular setting as it had for Faith, when he saw a desk and a leather chair behind it. When the chair swiveled around, Lilah Morgan smiled at him.

"Hello, lover," she said.

Her voice, perfect in every nuance.

"Hello, Lilah," he said tired. "How's the neck?" he asked, hoping that the rudeness would make this particular ghost fade faster.

"Fine. Hurts a little in bad weather. Feels like someone cut off my head. How's yours?"

"I don't have time for this," Wesley said,

Lilah looked at her watch.

"I should have thought you were playing for time. You are counting on the dawn to save your posse, aren't you?"

The words chilled him to the core. Had he made a mistake? He had based even his worst case scenario on the certainty that daylight turned vampires to dust.

"I always loved to see the little wheels turning in that devilishly handsome head of yours. The boys outside came a long way to defend the cave because they were promised eternal night."

The image of the girls' bodies torn limb from limb by dozens of vampires invaded his mind before he could stop it. Faith... No. This did not change anything. If he stopped the darkness from getting out, sunlight was going to protect them.

He moved toward Lilah. He saw a corridor behind her. He did not slow down when he heard Justine's voice.

"The great Wesley Wyndham-Pryce, the shining beacon of all that's good and pure."

Roger Wyndham-Pryce came out of a shadow and caught Wesley's free arm. Wesley's grip tightened on the salamander case while he pulled away from his father. More and more people he has let down or hurt in his past appeared in his path, but Wesley continued undaunted. None of them threw him like Faith had.

Connor, Angel, Buffy, Rupert Giles, Daniel Holtz, Lorne, Gunn.

Wesley sped up his pace knowing who was not there. He buried the memory deeper than any other, but he knew that he had not hidden it deep enough, he would never be able to hide it deep enough.

Looking at the floor, he noticed it was black, a dark mist floated throughout the cave, like an immaterial blanket. He turned his head to the place where the entrance was. It had reappeared. The darkness was flowing out. If he didn't activate the salamander soon, the darkness would win.

His conviction was renewed. Once again, he started to walk among the ghost of his past. He was pushing Lorne from his path and was about to get the salamander out of its case when he saw her.

Fred.

'Not real!' his brain screamed, but his hand froze in mid motion.

Wesley walked toward her. He would just look at her once, and then he'd activate the salamander. She was always going to be his greatest weakness. The source of the darkness was there, next to her. He was going to go to her, act all crazy in love, and just when his lips were on hers, he would end it all.

"We could have been together forever," Fred said. "If you came here alone, we could have lived happily ever after."

Wesley never got the chance to reply. He felt the sword go through his chest before he even saw her hand move. The salamander case fell from his hand. The other figures grabbed him and threw him back toward the entrance. He fell into the rising dark mist.

He looked to the exit. The darkness was flowing out even faster. He gathered his strength and tried to crawl back. Justine knelt next to him, knife once again at his throat. The swish of the blade... skin being slashed, blood gushing... Pain... Darkness enveloping him from inside and out.

He saw the hem of Faith's pink dress. Faith, Alex, the girls... he crawled a few more inches. The dark mist was rising. He never saw Angel's foot. He just felt the savage kicks, in his face, in his gut.

Wesley knew he was not going to make it. He had never accepted that his death would not stop other deaths. He had never accepted that he was going to lose.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

to be continued...