Shadows across the heart

FANDOM: Buffy the Vampire Slayer/Angel the Series
TITLE: Shadows across the heart
AUTHOR: Willie J
EMAIL: wmj166@yahoo.com
ARCHIVE SITE(S): http://www.slashaholics-island.com/library; http://www.adult-fanfiction.org;http://www.brain-insane.com/beyondcanon;
PAIRINGS: A/X in this part
RATING: R (for language)
WORDCOUNT:
DISCLAIMER: I don't own any part of Buffy et all, nor Angel the Series.
FEEDBACK: Oh please send me feedback, privately or through the list
DISTRIBUTION: List Archives
SPOILERS:
SUMMARY:
BETA'D BY: Elaine (the mighty)
SUMMARY: Something is very wrong in Sunnydale
A/N: Those of Buffyverse are naturally Joss' creations, however, any and all other characters mentioned are my own.


Chapter 10

A few words with his crew, demons and humans both, and Angel was ready for the arrival of the Sunnydalers. Though he couldn’t prevent a niggling sense of worry, especially considering his boy wasn’t giving him a clue as to what it was that had Xander so worried. Not ‘wigged’ out, but plain out-and-out worried. If he still had the breath and energy, Angel knew his mate would be pacing back and forth upstairs about now.

Xander was almost shit-in-his-pants scared.

He had left Ethan upstairs, figuring aptly, that the mage needed somebody to look after at this moment. Not even he was totally clueless to the frustrated, bitter look in the man’s eyes each time Rupert called. He mentally shook his head, wondering when the ex-Watcher would pull his head out of his ass and simply grovel for forgiveness. Not that Ethan wanted groveling, but it would add a nice touch.

Angel gazed down into the lobby and hid a smile. Standing at the top of the stairs he could see his humans. Cordy was sitting idly at her desk profiling and blowing kisses in a mirror, Gunn was casually shooting a ball against the wall and catching it, Wesley was casually discussing some obscure theory with Fred. Cordy and Gunn idly ad-libbed ridiculous comments into the serious discussion, which both annoyed and amused Wes and Fred.

But Angel wasn’t fooled by their nonchalance. Not one of them was leaving the hotel until Buffy et al were gone from L.A.

It took a village to raise a child, but it took good and caring people to make damn sure that child grew up.

He sent a look quick look behind him, nodding approval at the iron-faced demons guarding the elevators. There were more stationed throughout the hotel proper as well, and Casiwe was ready at a moments notice to move to protect her inhabitants.

Sharp ears catching the sound of a car pulling up, Angel began sauntered down the stairs. The closer he got to floor level, the flatter and harder his face became, until it finally resembled a cold, porcelain mask.

He moved as soundlessly as his namesake, yet all four humans broke off their conversation in midstream. Cordy and Gunn were moving and standing shoulder to shoulder by the time he reached the middle of the staircase. They were as deadly and alert as guard dogs.

Wes and Fred turned, facing the door. Proving their engrossing conversation a mere front.

Wes nodded to Cordy and Gunn, silently giving instructions and the Seer and Gunn strode with seemingly casualness towards the stairs as Angel stepped off the last step. They bracketed the vampire, like a mismatched pair of bookends. Other than a quick glance at him, they didn’t speak, this was his show. They were here for backup, not that he needed it. But they wanted to show Buffy that they were united in their determination to see to it that NOBODY upset Xander.

Fred, with a glance from Wes, slipped away to gather refreshments. If things went okay, well then, that was all good. But if things went bad, and she grinned nastily in a way that would have shocked the others, broken dishes had very sharp edges. Living in Pylea taught a runaway slave the value of finding and using ANYTHING to defend yourself.


In the castle, the youngest Guardian reclined in his bed, nervously chewing on a ragged nail. All his nails had been nibbled to the quick as his anxiety go the best of him.

“Casi, can you show me what’s going on downstairs?” Xander asked with forced calm. He was sitting in the middle of the bed, with Ethan doing the pacing back and forth for the both of them.

Ethan spun around, his dark eyes lighting up. He crawled eagerly into the bed with Xander when a image shimmered into view at the end of the bed. Then what was happening was played out before their eyes in vivid Technicolor.

“Xander, don’t you think it’s about time you told someone what’s going on…?” he asked mildly without removing his gaze from the ‘screen’.

“You’ll see…” Xander murmured quietly. His eyes held a dark, haunted look. A remembered gleam of horror in his eyes. “If I’m wrong…then I’ll thank every god in existence. But if I’m right…” A fleeting look of spine-tingling dread flashed across his face, almost too fast for the mage to catch.

Almost.

Ethan gave him a sharp look, a vague awareness stirring in his eyes. Disturbed, he turned back to the scene.


Buffy stalked into the Hyperion, an angry, haughty stiffness in her rigid back. Her expression was cool, a look of challenge gleaming in darkening eyes. She drew up at the sight of Cordy standing slightly behind Angel and a large black guy on the other side of the vampire. Vaguely memories of seeing them stirred in her mind when they had came to…savagely she cut off the dark memories roiling in her brain.

And faintly, a feeling of shame at her behavior rose in her heart. But she wasn’t too sure of how to change, how to stop. All her emotions were so confused, things were so unsettled. She just wanted things back the way they were: with her, Willow and Xander together. Friends.

“Buffy…” Angel drawled blandly, keeping his expression neutral. Yet there was a cold, quickly hidden, glitter of violence in his eyes. He clasped his hands in front of him, directing his attention over her head as the others came in the door behind her.

Spike took one look at his grandsire and put his hand on Buffy’s shoulder, and squeezed hard. Buffy flicked a glance at him, and seeing where his attention was fixated looked as well. And wisely took a step back, unconsciously taking a battle ready stance. There was something in his eyes that reminded her of…Angelus on a very bad day. Though years ago, she well remembered the last time she went head-to-head with Angel’s demonic self.

Wes strolled casually over to the group, and sidling past them, he took up a position at the foot of the stairs. A flick of his eyes summoned Cordy to his side. The two dark-haired members of Angel’s group impassively stared back at the Slayer. No hint of welcome in their eyes.

But there was a general attitude of ‘Go to hell!’ in the way they stood. Eyes watchful and still in their bland faces.

Buffy’s eyes took in the defensive blockade, and save for the brief twist of her lips, she ignored them.

“Angel…” she said, trying to soften the harsh accusation inherent in her voice. She didn’t come here for a confrontation. Just answers. She was still undecided as to what she wanted from Xander. To yell and scream at him or to collapse in his arms, crying over their lost friend.

Behind her, her people carefully fanned out. Each keeping a careful watch on their ‘opponents’ if that’s what they were. Only Spike seemed at ease in the tense atmosphere.

“Peaches…” he drawled, his eyes glittering with a cold, angry hardness. He pulled out a cigarette and went to light it.

Blinking when it was snatched out of his mouth. “No smoking…” Cordy growled before stomping back into her position.

“Wot the bloody hell…?!” Spike sputtered, his eyes widening in sheer disbelief at the effrontery of the crazy bint. “Soddin’ cheerleader, even if I still had me chip, you’re just a half-demon, that means I can still kick yer bloomin’ arse!” He angrily started forward.

“Spike…” The blonde vampire froze at the seemingly mild, conversational tone. Yet behind the blandness of his grandsire’s voice, he sensed a deadly, coiling black rage if he took one step more. “Don’t…” Angel added as an afterthought.

Angel switched his attention back to Buffy and Giles. “There will be a few rules concerning your stay in Casa Hyperion. As Cordy has succinctly pointed out, one of the rules: No smoking. However, the most important rule in this hotel is this: you upset Xander in any way, shape, form or size, I will bounce your ass so hard out of this hotel you will have permanent skid marks on your asses. And if you hesitate in getting into your car, then Cordy will hurt you. Swiftly followed by Gunn, Ethan, Fred and Wes will all get their chances of hurting you. Whatever’s left of you will belong to me.” There was a look of cruel amusement in his eyes at the shudder that swept over the mortals at his words.

His icy gaze passed over them like a cold, wintry wind. “If you wish to express your frustration over past events, and I would like to emphasize that it is in the PAST, I suggest you direct them at me, not Xander.”

“If you don’t believe you can abide by my…” he paused, as if choosing his words carefully, “Wishes, then do us all the favor and turn around and get the hell out of my hotel.” His smile was like a thin blade of a knife. Buffy shivered, and swallowed hard. Trying to reconcile THIS Angel with the Angel that looked at her with beautiful soft eyes. This was more like Angelus, but an even darker, crueler demon than that psycho.

“Xander must be putting out real good to get this kinda protection,” Dawn tittered maliciously under her breath. She gaped at the golden-eyed vampire that was suddenly in her face. She clawed at the hand wrapped around her throat, her heart stuttering with fear.

“Dawn…” her name was a drawn out hiss. “Little energy being made flesh, human but not…memories of you in my head. Memories of you in the world…false.” Angel’s voice held a sibilance sound of death. “I know you, little one. I remember a time when you didn’t exist and I remember giving you a pretty little doll for your birthday. So be very careful, little girl,” he growled softly. “Or I’ll make my first memories of you…
reality.”

“Angel, let her go NOW!” Buffy roared, coming out of her frozen shock at the deadly speed of her ex-lover’s reaction. She leaped into action and aimed a powerhouse blow to his jaw. But he wasn’t there. She stumbled, almost falling to the floor. Only Spike’s quick reaction saved her from falling flat on her ass.

Dawn leaned against the wall, gasping and wheezing for breath. Her wide, dark eyes were fixed on Angel in mute terror. And a seething hate filled her eyes. Angel held her gaze and smiled a coldly at the girl, his eyes promising a long and painful death.

Buffy spun around, her eyes a bitter hot blue. “Don’t you EVER touch my sister like that, or talk to her that way!” she spat out. “You got something to say about her behavior, you talk to ME! You understand?! You talk to me…” she breathed with instinctive protective fury. She stood in front of Dawn, her hands clenched in tight fists.

Angel switched his attention to the enraged Slayer. Tilting his head to the side, he gave her an icy, bored stare. But behind his frozen calm, his mind was racing. At last, recognizing what Xander had carefully NOT told him.

And he wondered with a sense of hollow despair what price would have to be paid this time.

“As long as we understand each other,” he said mildly, maintaining a golden-eyed stare. “If I hear her say ONE derogatory thing to Xander, she will hurt.”

Then he smiled abruptly, a patently false smile of welcome that in no way was reflected in his emotionless eyes. “Now that we understand each other, Cordy and Wes’ll escort you all to rooms for your stay. You can access the Library tomorrow morning,” he said sharply when Giles looked as if to protest. “We’ve all had a very long day, besides, I’m sure the m’Doth will be there, waiting for you when you return to Sunnydale.”

“Fine,” Buffy snapped angrily, seeing the unrelenting look on Angel’s face. She turned to Cordy. “Well…?” she sneered at the two. Blinking at the flash of white-glowing eyes the Seer sported for a brief second. Then familiar brown eyes appeared as the other girl turned and silently lead the way up the stairs.

“Spike…” Angel called softly as the other vampire turned silently towards the stairs. “A moment of your time if you please.”

Buffy stopped and gave the two vampires a hard, suspicious look. Her eyes narrowing on the carefully blank expression Spike wore. Her lips tightening, Buffy turned and continued after Cordy and Wes. She came to an abrupt halt at the sight of two massive demons guarding an elevator. Her lips parted, to angrily decry the obvious insult. But when she saw the waiting, sardonic look Wes gave her, she snapped her mouth shut. She knew they expected her to say something and her lips pressed into a thin line, restraining her words of protest. She wouldn’t give them the satisfaction of saying a damn thing.

Anya looked fixedly at the guards, a slight hiss of recognition coming from her lips. She shivered and stayed closer to the group.

Angel said nothing as the others had ventured up the stairs. He merely turned away, heading for the basement. Positive his errant grandchilde would follow. Much like a cat, Spike’s besetting sin was curiosity.

The blonde vampire hesitated, his eyes darting to the large black youth and the thin girl. Both were watching him with wary, yet eager eyes. Probably waiting for him to act in some way that would allow them the pleasure of staking him, he thought sardonically. But wild curiosity was stirring in him. There was the familiar scent of his nummy, but it was…different somehow. Shrugging, he followed the older vampire, knowing Angel would have the answers.


Limping, Angel made his way upstairs from the lobby. He was pleased with the way his little ‘talk’ in the basement with Spike went. He idly made a mental note to call a contractor to patch up the gaping holes that now riddled the basement walls and floors.

His head mussed, various cuts and bruised dotting his face and bared flesh Angel dabbed at his cut mouth. He pretended not to see the amused looks he got from the demons guarding the elevators.

Head down, and holding his side, Spike followed wearily behind the older vampire. He was sporting a black eye, and nasty claw marks on his cheek. However, he was smugly confident that this time, he gave as good as he got. There was a certain confident swaggered in his halting gait. He pushed himself, and raised his head proudly as he walked at Angel’s side. Darting a sidelong look at the other vampire, he was supremely confident that lard-arse looked worse.

Both their clothes were liberally ripped, giving testimony to the rather spirited discussion they had had in the basement.

Spike remained stoically silent as they rode the elevator. Biting his lip, he still maintained his silence when the doors opened into a vast library. One he KNEW wasn’t soddin’ well part of Peaches hotel! ‘Sides, it would never fit. He darted suspicious a look at Angel, then a more surreptitious look around at the multitude of demons, standing still and watching them.

No, they were watching him. All that narrowed-eyed concentration focused exclusively on him. Slowly, he was starting to get a sense that whatever his boy was mixed up in, it was BIG. Much bigger than the Slayer and that grandiose Council of Wankers.

He merely followed Angel, the demons were making him distinctively…not nervous exactly…just cautious. Very, very cautious.

By the time they rode up another elevator, he was beyond expecting normalcy.


Xander sighed as Angel appeared with Spike in tow. He was sitting propped up with pillows while Ethan was at the balcony glaring out into the night.

“Spike…” he smiled faintly, darting a quick look at Angel and receiving a short nod in return.

“Xan,” Spike said quietly, unable to stop his hungry gaze from roving over the beloved face. He frowned slightly, giving Angel an accusing look before turning back to his nummy. What the hell was ol’ lard-bucket letting his boy get so…so…his indignant frown turned puzzled. Vivid blue eyes narrowed on Xander who squirmed uncomfortably under the searing gaze.

Abruptly Xander yelped and listed heavily over in the bed. His face paling, bright tears glittered in his eyes. Instantly Angel was at his side, and Ethan a few seconds more on his other side.

“Hurts…” he whimpered, burying his face in Ethan’s comforting chest. “Make them stop…” he wailed, pressing his hand to his side trying to force the little hell spawns from his ribs. Sharp pain stabbed at him again when a foot or hand shifted to another sensitive area. “Ohhhhhh…”

“Shhhh, my boy…it’s okay…” Ethan ran his fingers over the boy’s head. Stroking and soothing the whimpering child.

Angel pushed the mound of covers away from Xander, and pulled his lover’s shirt up. Revealing the large, tightly stretched stomach to Spike’s astonished gaze.

Pressing his open mouth against Xander’s belly, Angel closed his eyes and began purring. They had found the rumbling vibrations, when traveling through Xander’s skin, somehow soothed the babies. While Angel hated to see Xander in pain, he felt proud and humbled that with a simple comforting sound, he was able to connect with their children.

All three men had forgotten about the blonde vampire standing, gaping at the scene. “Wot the fuck…?”

Ethan looked up, his eyes narrowing on the vampire. “I’ll thank you, sirrah, to keep a civil tongue in your head! There are children present,” he snapped with icy, disdainful hauteur.

To his surprise, Spike found himself hastily apologizing. “Sorry…didn’t…I mean…I was…just…” he stumbled in making his excuses.

The dark haired mage nodded regally. “Apology accepted.” He looked down at Xander, smoothing his hand over the boy’s head, feeling the tension ease from the child. “As you can plainly see, Xander is with child. It is part and parcel of being a Guardian.”

“But…but…he doesn’t have any female parts!” Spike protested wildly, a note of triumph in his voice.

“I do now…” Xander sighed ruefully, lifting his head. He glanced down at Angel, still purring. He smiled, running his hand through his Defender’s short spiky hair. Unless some real danger presented itself, Angel usually didn’t like to move when he was like this. Like his mate, Xander felt a connection between them, between the children, Angel and himself during times like this. And he would hold on to the memory of this soft, magic moment with all his strength.

While there was no love, per se between him and Angel, there was a whole lot of liking, he quipped to himself.

He probably felt the way the kids felt. Warm, safe and comforted by the vampire.

Gently he traced the curve of Angel’s cheek, and throat, feeling soothed himself by the vibrating purr. Regretfully, he tapped the vampire’s cool flesh, signaling an end.

Jealously, Spike watched the cozy scene. Well, it would be cozy if Ethan wasn’t there, he thought grudgingly. His eyes narrowed even further when the magic man eased Xander into Angel’s arms. A slight growl rumbled in his throat and he shifted his weight, nothing more than the desire to snatch Xander from Angel’s arms ruling him.

Instantly Angel’s eyes were upon him, yet remarkably enough, the vampire’s face and eyes were still human-looking. But still Spike shivered, taking a careful step back. Even at his most vicious, Angelus never looked so inhuman.

“Angel…” and Spike watched a remarkable transformation overtake the older vampire at Xander’s gentle protest. “You promised…”

Angel sighed, looking down into Xander’s clear brown gaze. “Fine…” he grumbled, smirking at the annoyed way the boy’s brows snapped together. He smiled widely, both he and Ethan snickering at the exasperated roll of Xander’s eyes.

“How…? I mean, I know HOW. At least I know how wif women and females,” Spike began, stumbling over his words. He gestured confusedly to the two males. “But you’re blokes! Both o’ya are!”

Xander cast his eyes up to heaven, praying for strength. “Thank you, I think we’ve both kinda noticed that,” he said sarcastically. Then sighed at the hurt look on Spike’s face. “Seriously, it was sorta an accident that I got pregnant,” he began.

“If it’s an accident, then get rid of…” Spike started to say. But when Xander’s face went still and blank he tried to recover. “It’s not natural…blokes having babies! Can’t you see that…I mean…it’s just not natural!” he cried indignantly, crossing his arms defiantly and glaring at the other three. His expression was stubborn and unchanging despite the uncertainty that rocked the foundations of his world.

Ethan eased off the bed with a quiet murmur. This was no place for him. Besides, he had a feeling that if Spike didn’t shut up, the blonde vampire was going to be liberally splattered all over the room. And he simply abhorred the sight of blood. Ethan shuddered delicately.

Without a backward look, he strolled out of the bedroom and onto the balcony. Once outside, he quietly requested that Casiwe bring the others into the Castle proper. He knew Xander would need to speak with them all posthaste.


An hour later, Gunn and the others were generally preparing for bed in the hotel. They had long since given up their own living apartments in the city and took rooms in the hotel. It wasn’t like Angel and Xander needed them anyhow.

Besides, the rent was free and so was the food.

Cordy, examining her flawless face for imperfections, noticed her room shift and flow into her room in the castle. Without blinking, she merely gathered the skirt of her long, black lace gown to the side and slid her feet into her 3 ½ inch mules. Unnoticing or uncaring of the amount of flesh she was showing with the plunging neckline or the fact that all her back was showing. She sauntered to the door and exited her room, instinctively knowing that something was wrong.

Walking to Xander and Angel’s suite, she wasn’t too surprised to see Gunn and Wesley strolling down the hall talking quietly to each other. Preening at their goggling stare, she smiled when they encountered Fred as they turned the corner. Wes’ eyes widened at her attire, and Gunn simply gaped at Fred’s night attire.

It was almost as risqué as Cordy’s.

Both men hands danced uncertainly over their white t-shirts, a strong urge to cover both girls with material warring in them. Lots and lots of material.

Fred blushed furiously when Gunn gave a soundless whistle. She tugged her short, translucent wrap tighter about her body in an effort to hide the tiny, lacey boy-shorts and sheer bra-like top she was wearing. She wondered idly if people ever died of embarrassment, because the way she was feeling right now, it was a distinct possibility.

Why she ever listened to Cordy, she would go to her grave never knowing. If her mama and daddy saw her in this she would just DIE!

Tomorrow, she was marching back to the store and buying her usual footie pajamas!

Cordy sighed and wondered why she bothered to try to make people look even remotely fashionable. If Fred would just stand up straight, she would look okay. But no, she had to slump like she had something to be ashamed of.

Shaking her head in dismay, Cordy sauntered alongside Fred, with her usual savoir flair. Trying her best to inspire confidence in Fred. That they were behind the men helped, she noted with an approving sidelong glance as the other girl slowly walked erect. In a couple of months she would have Fred walking tall and proud.

Along the way, they past a furious looking Spike being escorted politely back to the Hotel. He growled as soon as he caught sight of them, his blue eyes alive with so much rage it was a wonder that he didn’t combust on the spot. Gunn and Cordy merely gave him cool looks as they passed.

They entered the room and casually took their usual positions. With a quick glance at Cordy, Fred tried to mimic the other girl’s studied grace. Flushing in pleasure at the slight smile and nod she received from Gunn.

Ethan stood in the shadows of the balcony, slightly hidden and listening as Angel’s people talked softly among themselves. And in watching the lean young men and women that made up Angel’s tiny court he reevaluated his opinion of them as if with fresh eyes. Despite their seemingly casualness, these four young people had been reforged in the crucible of hellfire. They were warriors, plain and simple. Time and again, they had their mettle tested and emerged from the clash of arms, scarred but triumphant. Day in and day out, they sallied forth to do battle with evil, never knowing if they would return on their feet or on their shields.

He wondered if they even cared, so long as their opponents had been defeated. Some day soon, if the vampire continued to pull such hardy, sturdy warriors to him, not even the Slayer herself or that foolish Council of Watchers would be able to hold a candle to any of Angel’s people.

Angel’s people were terrifyingly efficient in their tasks. He smirked, Giles’ precious little Slayer may wake up and find her services no longer needed. His brief mood passing as a sober thought took shape within his mind: would these children be up to the new challenge? Hidden in the castle, he had a sense of what was going on or what would soon happen.

Shaking his dark thoughts from his mind, he sought a measure of the boundless confidence the young people exuded so easily and ventured into the room. Sprawling carelessly in what he had claimed as HIS chair, Ethan gazed around the lighthearted group with a faint half-smile, throwing his fate in with theirs. They would win this battle.

They all had their favorite seats in the spacious room and he claimed this chair for himself. If Angel wanted to use it when he wasn’t around, it was okay with him. However, when he was present, it belonged to him. It was perfect for him, and he certainly looked imposingly regal whenever he sat in it.

Cordy adored the rolled arm couch; she could lounge on it and know she looked her glorious best. Both Wes and Gunn liked the other couch; they could sit next to each other and cuddle without looking like they were cuddling. While Fred liked the matching ottoman to Ethan’s chair. If he had his feet on it, she merely pushed them off and calmly took her seat. In a weird way, she wasn’t the least intimated by the mage.

Idly the five humans made conversation as they waited. All denying the growing dread and uneasiness that gathered like a dark cloud in the room. Whatever it was, they would face it. Together.


Angel regarded his mate with dark, thoughtful eyes. “Please tell me it was just my imagination that the Shadow Queen is in Dawn?”

Mutely Xander shook his head, plucking at the sheet that covered his knees.

“C’mon…all you have to say, is ‘Deadboy, you’re a stark, raving booby! Of course, the Shadow Queen’s been banished!’. Try it,” Angel urged, his eyes becoming a little wild at the thought of going up against HER again.

A morbid smile on his face, Xander shook his head. “Giles kept dropping all these little clues about Dawn cutting up, plus I started having this really wigged out feeling something bad was coming,” he said quietly without looking up. “But I couldn’t be sure whether I was imagining it or not. So I had to get them here, had to be sure. She can’t quite hide her true nature, not from me and definitely not from you.”

Xander slid out the bed and padded to the vampire. Carefully, he put his arms around Angel, softly whispering, “I’m sorry. I’m so scared…” He was trembling, his stomach tightening up with knots of tension.

Feeling his mate quivering against him, Angel sought the dubious comfort of Xander’s arms. His terror lessened, and he knew his mate found some measure of solace in his embrace as well. But he knew with a cold certainty that the price for stopping the Shadow Queen this time would be even higher.

Releasing his boy with a sigh of regret, he slid his hands down and interlocked their fingers. “Together…” he promised softly, gazing into Xander’s eyes. The young man’s smile quivered around the edges but his eyes were firm when he gazed at Angel. Silently he nodded.

“Let’s go tell them the bad news,” Angel said quietly, and leading the way, they walked hand-in-hand to the living room.

Cordy’s eyes slowly narrowed and she looked very catlike at the moment as she studied the almost imperceptible expression of deep unhappiness on Xander’s face.

“Either Spike’s done something incredibly stupid, which I find very easy to believe,” she began calmly, “Or the world, quite possibly, is coming to an end.”

“Again…?” Gunn yelped, his eyes becoming large. “Aw man! And I just washed my truck!”

Wesley calmly smacked him. “Xander…?” the British man prompted the young Guardian. But Xander mutely shook his head and looked pleadingly at Angel.

Angel sighed and pulled Xander to the loveseat. Carefully easing his pregnant mate down, he sat in the corner and tugged the boy into his body.

“The Shadow Queen is still present,” he stated baldly. A vibrating silence filled the room. Slowly, Cordy, Wes and Gunn straightened up from their careless sprawl even as Fred stood up. All four of the young humans’ faces hardened giving one the impression of soldiers buckling on their armor.

Ethan nodded faintly.

Warriors, one and all. Ready to mount their steeds and ride fearlessly into battle.

“Where and who…?” Wesley said tightly. There was a dangerous look on all their faces. And while Fred and Cordy were dressed scantily, both revealing an inordinate amount of flesh, there was no lessening of the impression of ruthlessness in the two women.

“Dawn…” Xander sighed, summoning the courage to speak. His eyes glistened briefly with tears before he fought them back. He looked up when the door opened and his fellow Guardians came in.

“And what will you do about it?” Alastair stated softly, his dark face cold and immobile. Giving no hint of his inner turmoil. Silently he cursed the fates that chose this child as Guardian.

Xander looked down, hiding his expression. But when he looked up again, they drew back at the almost inhuman remoteness in his dark eyes. “Whatever it takes. She will not get a toehold here. Not on my watch,” he vowed, a hint of Angel’s savagery in his voice.

“And the price…?” Kaori regarded him with predatory patience. Holding her sorrow at bay at the price the boy would have to pay.

The other humans looked at each other with puzzled eyes. Ethan closed his eyes, painful realization flaring in his mind. Only through death could Xander drive her away.

The young Guardian and Defender looked at each other. One promising strength and comfort, the other begging forgiveness.

“Whatever it takes…” Xander repeated quietly, turning to face the other Guardians. He knew the price, and with pain darkening his eyes, he willingly paid it. Pushing his pain aside for now, he knew there would be time enough to grieve later.

An arc of light pulsed from Xander and met the three arcs from the Guardians. All four arcs were of different colors: Kaori was green, Alastair was white, Alexis was lapis blue and Xander’s a simmering gold. Spiraling upwards, the four arcs seemed to chase each other before settling, one end meeting another with an almost audible click. A circle was formed.

The circle thrummed, a soft hum that set everyone’s teeth on edge. It colors flared brightly in a burst of light that forced all except the Guardians and Defenders to hide their eyes.

“The universe will hold you to your promise,” Lexy choked out, a strained look in her eyes. Her lips trembled before she firmed them, but an expression of terrible pain was in her eyes. She tried to continue but only managed a raspy sound.

Ka took over. Being the oldest, she had more time to learn to distant herself, control her emotions. “It is extremely rare to have a Guardianship revoked. However, should you balk at this, death will be the least of your concerns,” she said quietly, a slight note of warning in her voice. But having tasted his soul, she knew the boy would have gladly cast himself in the fires of hell if it would have taken care of the Shadow Queen.

She looked around the room. “As of this moment, those of you within this room have a measure of protection from HER.”

Ka looked at Xander, sitting white-faced and remote in the circle of his Defender’s arms. Her eyes softened, despite herself. She crossed over to him, and knelt at his feet. Framing his face in small hands, she tried to instill as much of her strength as possible in him. “Be strong, little one…” she begged softly, searching his dark shadowed eyes.

The price the pair would, have paid was high. She caught her breath at the awful look of grief in her young brother’s eyes. Staring into his eyes, a look of pity in her own, she experienced with him as death wound gently through the boy. She wished she could take this burden from her young brother, wished she take him in her arms and tell him everything would be okay.

But she couldn’t, because it wouldn’t. He knew it, Angel knew. They all knew it.

One last price to pay.

Wrapping her arms around him, she kissed his cheek and drew his head into her shoulder. Closing her eyes in empathetic pain, she heard the choked sob he gave and the wetness damping her cheongsam.

“You are not alone…” she whispered fiercely in his ear, her arms tightening around him before she released him. Standing, she rejoined their other brother and sister, their Defenders gathering around them protectively, sharing their pain.

With one last look at the young boy, the other three Guardians departed with their Defenders. For tonight, they would sleep with their Defenders and seek solace of the grief that was tearing through them.

Xtchaly gave a backwards look at Angel, letting his eyes express the sympathy he felt. They were so young, babies. And while they had many more years ahead of them, the first time was always the most special time. He sighed, his eyes regretful.

Angel nodded slightly, his eyes a dark gold. His arms tightened around Xander.

Gunn watched the Guardians leave with suspicious eyes. “Normally, I wouldn’t pick up on shit like this, but that science they just dropped on us don’t sound too Telatubby. So what’s up with the Price is Right shit y’all was talking about?”

“Willow chose to sacrifice her life, I guess she thought it would be enough to banish the Shadow Queen. I thought so too. But it wasn’t enough. She must have hid part of herself in Dawn’s magic. So when Willow returned it, a part of her went into Dawn. She can only occupy a ‘living’ host,” Xander said, his eyes steady on Gunn’s narrowed brown ones.

“Right now, she’s not anywhere near her full strength, but she’s growing. Fast. So in order to get rid of her for good, we, or rather I, need to figure out a way to trap her in dead flesh. Only death can truly banish her from this world.”

Fred looked curiously at him. “So where ya gonna git a dead…” her eyes widened as her gaze met Angel’s.

“No…not Angel,” Xander said hastily, grimacing as a cramp seized his insides.

Slowly Cordy stood up and stalked over to him with narrowed-eyed concentration. “Alexander LaVelle Harris, what is the price you’ll pay?” she said enunciated his full name softly, coldly.

He looked up at her with miserable eyes.

And she knew. With a low moan, she dropped to her knees and laid her head in his lap. Crying as if her heart was breaking.

“Aw fuck…” Gunn whispered, understanding. He exploded off the couch and stalked to the balcony. There he stood, his hands fisted at his sides and his jaw clenched. He vibrated with helpless fury.

Fred ran over to Xander and squeezed herself onto the couch on his left side. Burying her tears in his shoulders.

Ethan looked away from the pain on the children’s faces. There was nothing anyone could do to stop what had already been done.

Wes got up and went to Gunn, and simply held on. Both their faces were wet with the tears they fought a useless battle not to shed.

But there was a growing rage in the room. A deadly, voracious maelstrom of terrifying fury.

“We are gonna kick that bitch’s ass to hell and stomp on her face while we’re at it,” Cordy vowed in a watery growl, looking up at Angel with red eyes.

Angel looked down, then back up at the low snarl of agreement that came from his friends’ throats. He looked down at Xander, and saw the same rage in his mate’s eyes.

“Count on it…” he said, his eyes hard and cold.


Bright and early Buffy was waiting at her door. Her expression one of strained patience.

She tried her door again, shaking it briskly. What a surprise, I still can’t open the damn door! She snarled to herself. Not even Slayer strength was going to open it. She had tried kicking it, but it only made her foot hurt like she had dropped a cement block on it.

There was a soft knock at her door. “Ms. Buffy...? You up yet?” Fred called cheerfully through the door. She had a pretty good idea that the blonde girl had been trying to get out of her room. All of the Sunnydale people were. But they had had a meeting upstairs, and the reluctant consensus was to not tell Buffy that her sister was the new host of the Shadow Queen. After all, what could she do other than spook the bitch? If they could pull this off, then Dawn could be saved. And the dark-haired Texan refused to allow her mind to rest on who would be lost.

“Open. The. Door.” Buffy growled, slamming her open palm against the flat surface.

“Excuse me…?” Fred exchanged a merry grin with Gunn.

“It won’t…” Buffy, with a huff of sheer annoyance, grabbed the doorknob, “Open…” she trailed off as the door opened easily under her hand. She gazed in suspicious confusion at the composed dark-haired girl on the other side. She glared first at the tall black youth, then the girl.

“Is this how you treat friends?” she demanded angrily when they turned away.

Gunn peered blandly down at the slightly built girl. “Girlie, I don’t even know you,” he said pleasantly. “And with that funky attitude you bringing up in my boy’s crib, I don’t think I want to.” His long legs ate up the distance, forcing Buffy to walk faster. Fred had no trouble keeping up with him; her natural leggy gait was an amble that covered ground in a remarkably rapid pace.

“Angel knows me, so does Cordy, Wes and Xander,” Buffy exclaimed when they paused at another door. Gunn knocked politely, it was immediately opened by an irate looking Giles.

“But they’re not here…” Fred said gently, a sweetly disarming smile on her face. However, it was the darkness in her eyes that had Buffy closing her mouth and eyeing the thin girl uneasily.

“Where’s Xander by the way?” she said. Wincing, she hurriedly signaled Giles not to spew the furious tirade of words that she just knew he wanted to say. She had caught sight of the enormous demons standing at the elevators. Watching them with flat, dead eyes. But she thought she could take them. However, she eyed the huge cats sprawled in front of the elevators, but those cats just might be a problem.

Dawn’s mouth was twisted up in an ugly snarl. A look that she swiftly checked at the sight of the cool hardness in Gunn’s eyes. She gave him her most innocent, charming smile. But he just turned away with no change in his expression. Collecting Anya and Tara, the party moved towards the elevators.

Gunn reached down and slapped one of the cats. “Chos-chos, move,” he said, laughing when the large animal rolled over on her back. Purring winsomely all the while.

Fred snickered. “Go on, you babe magnet, you,” she smirked nudging him companionably in the rigs. “Rub her belly…”

Gunn gave her a mock evil glare. “You just wait…” he threatened the laughing girl as he kneeled and gave the playful cat a quick belly rub.

Letting out a throaty croon, the cat gracefully got back on her feet. A venomous hiss at the Sunnydalers, then a purr as she rubbed against Gunn and Fred before she moved away from the door.

Her sister was calmly washing a paw. Intent on making sure her claws were in the best possible condition. Sharp teeth worried at her paw and slowly five inch long claws emerged from the sheaths that covered her lethal weapons.

The two guards stood politely aside, hiding smiles at the sick look of terror that developed on the interloper’s faces.

Gesturing the Sunnydalers inside the elevator, Fred then Gunn stepped inside. Pressing the fourth floor, the elevator rose smoothly, then stopped with a slight shudder.

And when it opened, Giles forgot his intense rage at the sight of the bustling library. That is, it was bustling until they stepped off the elevator. Then a quiet stillness spread outward. One by one, grey-skinned demons turned towards them.

One tall and slender male glided to them. His face calm and remote.

“Yo ‘Run-Run, Xan and Angel down yet?” Gunn said casually stepping forward to meet the other.

Arun sighed, looking profoundly exasperated. “Why must you continue to call me by that ridiculous name?”

Giles fought back a smile.

“I’m just playing with ya,” Gunn smirked. He loved getting a rise out of the prim and proper demon.

“Yes, Lord Xander is down, and Master Angel is conversing with his grandchilde. I believe Miss Cordy and Mister Ethan both decided to go sailing.” All the while his eyes were fastened on the Sunnydalers in cold inquiry.

And not one of them were sanguine about their welcome.

“My people are here to assist you in finding whatever information you need. It will help speed your search,” he continued softly.

Giles looked at Buffy, the same thought in both their heads. The only reason why they were offered help was to get them the hell out of here faster.

“Arun, be nice…” Xander called to the demon. Though quiet, his voice carried.

Instantly attention was turned towards where he was sitting behind a large table.

“Xander…” Buffy breathed, and Dawn darted her sister a quick angry look.

He smiled gently at his golden girl. “Buff…”

Spike and Angel came down the elevator and strode towards the group.

The blonde vampire joined the Sunnydalers, his face blank and composed. Angel went immediately to Xander, and rested a hand on his mate’s shoulder.

There was a period of silence. A moment when harsh words or heartfelt sobs could easily fill the silence. Buffy took a deep breath, and slowly exhaled. “Where do we start…?” she said, looking away from Xander. But she was worried over how plump his face had gotten. How would he be able to fight or run if he got too fat, she thought worriedly.

Giles frowned, looking at Xander and shook his head slightly. Maybe he should discretely suggest to Angel that perhaps Xander should be on a diet, he mused to himself.

Arun gestured her to the table where Xander was sitting.

“Buffy, there’s something I need to tell you,” Xander said nervously, his hands twisting under the table.

“What…?” she said, struggling with her need to scream at him. Ask him WHY?! What had happened?! There were so many unanswered questions she had.

“I’m…kinda…uhm…that is…oh, this is dif…fi…cult,” he muttered crossly to himself. He looked at the group again, then glared at the amused grin Gunn had on his face. “Yeah, keep on laughing, smartass…I’m gonna sic Cordy on you,” he smirked at the alarmed expression now on the man’s face. He snorted, a cocky look on his face. “Who’s laughing now, buddy?!”

“C’mon man, that’s not fair…” Gunn protested. “Besides, how you gonna get her…” his voice trailed off as a tragic, forlorn look appeared in Xander. The young man looked for all the world like his life was coming to an immediate end. An end that involved lots and lots of pain. “Dammit, Xander! That ain’t even fair…!”

“Hehehehe, I know…” Xander chortled, his face clearing up instantly. Fred had collapsed in laughter, Angel’s shoulders were shaking and the other demons were fighting to retain their deadpanned looks. But it was difficult.

“What is going on…?” Buffy’s voice cut through the merriment like a scalpel. She glared, the skin around her eyes tightening at the sight of Xander laughing and happy. Realistically she understood that he had found a home with these other people, but they weren’t her. They weren’t Willow or…or…Giles!

Xander looked at her, then down. His hands came up and rested on the table. Then he pushed back his chair and stood up. “I’m pregnant,” he said bluntly.

“Bloody hell…” Giles muttered. His eyes narrowing on the large belly that Xander was sporting. Buffy remained silent, a look of shock on her face.

But behind Dawn’s eyes, the Shadow Queen’s original plans were swiftly discarded in favor of another, much more promising venture. She snapped irritably at the stubborn mortal that still resisted and fought against her. And not for the first time, wondered what it was about these particular humans that made them so difficult to overcome?

“Omigawd,” she whispered, her eyes widening with true delight. If she took over the child, she would have much more of a leverage against those despicable Guardians. She was confident that neither father would want to destroy their own child. Plus she would have many years to subvert their will, all right under their noses!

“Well…” Xander said brightly, his attention on Buffy. “Aren’t you gonna say something?” He had a crooked, impish grin on his face.

The Library was still and quiet as everyone waited for Buffy’s reply. The demon’s faces were flat and cold, promise of bloody mayhem in their eyes if Master Angel’s mate became upset.

Buffy took no notice of them, her disbelieving eyes locked on Xander’s belly. Her eyes darted up to his face, her mouth open in an expression of shock. She looked wildly around, as if to share her disbelief with the others. But saw they were all waiting for her to say something. But how could she talk when she didn’t even know what to say?

Buffy’s mouth closed with an audible snap, her lips pressed in a thin flat line. She stared hard at Xander, her face becoming tight. She opened her mouth, to say what, she didn’t know, and saw something strange in his eyes, something that she never thought she would ever see in Xander’s eyes. What she saw stopped her words stillborn in her mouth.

Behind that forced, bright smile Xander was scared…of her! And slowly her mouth closed, and she retreated behind a blank mask of non-expression, struggling to deal with this impossible, but clearly possible, occurrence.

Everything she was as a Slayer screamed for her to get Xander away from all these demons. All her instincts, her love for her last remaining high school friend cried out, insisted that she bundled Xander up and take him home.

Circle the wagons, and get out the buckshot…the Indians were a-comin’!

Once home, she could seal the doors and board up the windows…keep him safe. Safe, protected and cocooned from harm. The way she failed to do with Willow.

But taking a long look at the many people and demons gathered around her, watching with grimly intent eyes, waiting for her to say something stupid and harsh, she realized with a spasm of painful understanding…Xander was home. He was protected in a way that she couldn’t even hope to come close. She saw the way Angel looked at her dark-haired friend, the protective way he hovered behind Xander. Somehow she knew Angel would willingly walk into the sun rather than allow harm to come to Xander.

“I presume you’re the father…?” she said, looking directly at Angel. He gave a short, abrupt nod, watching her with deadly intent. “Congratulations…” she said quietly, turning her gaze towards Xander. .

Buffy’s mind turned in a different direction, thoughts of the dangers the m’Doth demon posed to Sunnydale temporarily pushed aside. She was busy trying to recall how many baby clothing stores she recalled seeing in the mall.

“Boy or girl?” she asked, distractedly, quickly calculating how much money she had in the bank. Obviously, she was going to need a crib, and a car seat. Plus she was going to have to learn how to change diapers.

She was going to be an aunt! Slowly a grin spread over her face. “It’s kinda funny, but I always thought I would be the first to get pregnant!” She giggled at the horrified gasp Giles gave.

Giles choked slightly, his eyes crossing at the thought of his Slayer pregnant. He shuddered; somehow he just knew he would be assigned night duties! His face reflected wonder at the thought of one of his children becoming a parent. He straightened, looking around with a sense of pride.

He was going to be a bloody grandfather! Perhaps he should start researching what that entailed, he thought worriedly.

“You…you’re…not upset?” Xander squeaked, his eyes rounding. He leaned heavily against Angel.

“No…why should I be?” Buffy asked, looking puzzled then her face cleared. “Oh, you mean because of Angel? I mean, even though he’s all vampirey you know and they’re like, not known for little vampires-like rugrats, except for the grown-up, bitey kind, but I’m happy for you as long as you’re making with the happy yourself… not that kind of happy, cuz’ I so don’t need a mental image!” she hurried to clarify, her words a tumbling rush of sound as her face redden in embarrassment. “The happy, feeling kind. If you’re happy, I’m cool. But after the baby, we really need to have us a real sit down. Deal?”

Xander smiled slowly, a weight lifting off his shoulders. For now, he would take this moment and savor it.

Gunn looked befuddled, as did Fred. She had no idea what the blonde girl had just said.

Anya snickered, looking at the two confused people.

She and Tara exchanged amused looks before the blonde witch leaned to whisper to the other two. “Buffy only said that as long as Xander’s happy, she’s happy. She, like the rest of us, was not aware that vampires were capable of biological reproduction. Which, I have to admit, puzzles me as well.”

“Oh,” Gunn said, his confused look fading. “Oh, well, it’s one of those Guardian and Defender things,” he said, waving a hand vaguely in the air.

Buffy cleared her throat, looking apologetic. “I’m happy for you, Xan, really happy…but we still have a demon to research,” she said, turning her mind back to the matter at hand. Though her eyes went wistfully to his stomach. She just wanted to touch, to feel what that burgeoning mound felt like.

“Yeah…” Xander smiled and looked at Arun, a hint of warning in his eyes. “I’ll stay and help.”

The blonde Slayer smiled widely. “Seems almost like old times,” she said with a half smile that slowly faded as they both recalled their lost friend.

“Almost…” Xander replied softly, his eyes haunted and dark with pain. Buffy felt tears prick her eyes and hastily lowered her gaze to the floor.


As they poured themselves into researching, Buffy discovered a facet to Xander’s pregnancy. He fell asleep at the drop of a hat. She fondly eyed his snoring form, sprawled in the most uncomfortable way in the chair. Deciding to make him more comfortable, her hand a millimeter from his shoulder, Buffy found her wrist seized in a grip of iron. Gasping slightly she looked into Gunn’s dark, stern face.

“Don’t touch him…” was all he said before quietly pushing back his chair and getting to his feet.

Looking around, Anya blinked at the increased activity in the Library. Understanding dawned quickly as to the reason. From various drawers and cabinets, blankets and other items were withdrawn. A nearby table, covered by a thick, foam pad, had a dark, patterned sheet spread over it and a pillow was placed on the comfortable looking makeshift bed.

A massive black animal, the size of a cow, flowed with sinuous grace down the stairs from the top floors of the Library. It lithely leaped onto the table and lay down. It eyed them with cool, condescending disdain.

The visiting Sunnydalers watched the activities with astonished looks. Wondering what was going on. In looking at the animals, Buffy couldn’t shake the odd feeling it was laughing at them.

Sighing, the others just shook their heads and worked around the cat-like animal. Then four more animals padded down and sat on their haunches. Their eyes, eerily alight as they waited with calm patience.

When a huge, muscular guard carefully drew back Xander’s chair and scooped the slumbering man in her arms, Buffy understood what prompted the flurry of activity. Gently, as if carrying something infinitely precious, the female walked over to the table and laid Xander down on the hastily prepared bed.

With a soft murmuring sigh, Xander rolled over and pillowed his head on the animal’s body. It gazed down at the boy, the tendrils on its’ head caressing Xander’s face before it turned and rested its head on outstretched paws. Two of the other creatures jumped lightly atop the table and curled around the human. The remaining two shifted to face the Sunnydalers, gazing at them with cold, inhuman patience.

Living, dangerous sentinels.

Gunn covered the young Guardian with a light blanket and returned to his chair. He was grimly intent on helping the Sunnydalers and getting them the hell out of the hotel. He was twitching with the Shadow Queen so close to him, to them, even though he knew she was too weak to do anything to him right now.

“Does he do this often?” Tara leaned over to Fred to whisper.

“Often enough that we have places ready just in case,” the slender Texan replied softly, looking at Xander’s sleeping form.

Spike lowered his eyes back to the book he was studying so intently. His hand under the table clenched in a tight fist. Ever since Peaches told him what was going on, what was going to happen, all he wanted to do was tear out the bitch’s throat. But that wouldn’t help; ‘sides it was his Niblet’s body that he would be hurting. That he would be killing. And he wasn’t sure if he was prepared to go that far. Sure, giving her a good smack ‘cross her ears was okay, but killing her?

He mourned his previous badass image. It was those damn soldiers and that soddin’ chip’s fault, he thought sourly. If it hadn’t been for them, he would have been happily munching his way through Sunnydale. Now look at him, he couldn’t even kill a little girl, ‘cuz he liked her!

There was a time when he would have laughed while either Dru or Angelus cut her to ribbons, all preliminary to feeding. But now…he sighed and shook his head.

He was a bloody pouf and pretty soon he was going to get a fat arse and start brooding. Spike shuddered in horror at that imaginary.


Cordy sauntered out of the elevator in an itsy-bitsy, yellow polka dot bikini. Hips a-swinging and a sassy smile on her face, she never failed to turn heads. Today was no exception. Several demons stopped talking abruptly to watch her walk by.

Arun and Xtchaly rolled their eyes and regarded her with amused patience.

“Enjoying yourself, my dear?” the incubus asked dryly. Laughter was dancing in his eyes at the enticing, little wiggle in the girl’s body. He shook his head, that half-breed had almost as much sex appeal as a succubus.

“Are they still looking and are their tongues hanging out?” she retorted unphased by his amusement. “If they are, then hell yeah!” she exclaimed brightly.

“How’s my sweetie?” she said strutting over to Xander slumbering form. Her face softening as she drew the blanket higher on his shoulders. She calmly ignored the Sunnydalers. While a good actress she didn’t think she was THAT good. So the best thing to do was pretend they weren’t here. That she was very good at.

“Sleep, and that nasty fake-wannabe blonde bitch will soon be gone,” she whispered in his ear.

Spike hid a smile when Buffy’s hand instinctively went to her hair. Slayers had very good hearing.

Cordy turned, her eyes passing dismissively over Buffy before she retreated back upstairs, passing Ethan who was sauntering down with a string of fish.

Gunn’s eyes lit up. “Dude, tell me you caught the big one?!” he half whispered getting up from his chair.

“I did indeed,” Ethan smirked, holding up a large fish and eyeing it with fierce satisfaction. “He put up a good fight…but in the end there can be only one,” he intoned with mock solemnity, merriment dancing in his eyes.

Xtchaly strolled over to him and kissed him lingeringly. Ethan, no fool, extended the fish to Gunn, safely out of reach of the incubus’ grasp.

“And no,” he gasped out, when his lips were released, “You can’t have any. Lexi said if anybody gave you fish, she would skin them alive. And I value my skin much too highly…ooooh,” he shivered when the incubus licked a long wet line up his neck.

“You’re not playing fair,” he complained weakly. He shuddered with excitement when Xtchaly rubbed against him, and those talented hands trailed down his back. His pleasure came to a screeching halt at the sight of Rupert’s disapproving gaze.

He straightened hurriedly, his innate pride coming to the fore. He glared back at his ex-lover.

Giles blinked and took off his glasses, rubbing the bridge of his nose. In reality he wanted to pound his head against the table.

Confound it! Why must I comport myself with such rude, loutish behavior, he thought angrily.

Then pushing back his chair and standing, he cleared his throat before asking with careful politeness, “Ethan, might I have a word with you?”

Ethan’s eyes widened, an uncertain look passing over his face before he recovered. He definitely wasn’t expecting Rupert to act…civil towards him. So far, all their exchanges had been full of animosity.

He glanced at Xtchaly, betraying his nervousness. The incubus gave him a slight push. “Go on, you know you want to,” the male whispered gently. He smiled, but his eyes were a frozen, glittering wasteland when he looked at the ex-Watcher. Ethan was a fantastic lover, and an even more generous person. If Giles hurt him, Xtchaly was going to show the human just how a sex demon took revenge.

There was an excellent reason why incubui and succubui were so feared. His eyes gleamed with an icy ruthlessness. While sex can be mind-shattering pleasure, in the hands of a Master incubus, it could also become excruciating agony. And he had long since passed his Mastery.

“We…can talk downstairs,” Ethan replied stiltedly, his face composed. “I need to clean the fish so we can talk in the kitchen.” Taking back his catch, and with feigned nonchalance, he headed to the hotel elevator, closely followed by Giles.

Gunn smirked. He had a feeling G-unit was gonna be on his knees. And not groveling either.


It took several hours for the researcher to complete their findings. It probably would have gone much more rapidly had Giles returned, however he was still…discussing matters with Ethan.

Xander woke just as they found a way to easily defeat m’Doth as well as a number of other demons. Wesley and Angel returned as well; Wes from the hotel entrance, Angel from the castle. The vampire headed immediately for his groggy mate, pulling Xander’s slumping form against him and nuzzling the boy’s neck. Just enjoying the sleep warmed flavor of his drowsy human. Half conscious, Xander simply went with the flow, his eyes half-closed as he rested in Angel’s protective embrace.

Buffy looked away from the duo, unhappy, but accepting the relationship. It wasn’t like she wanted Angel; she just wanted Xander back in her life. Her eyes fell on the elevator that the others used and she frowned curiously at the contraption that seemed to lead…somewhere.

“What’s up there?” she asked Fred, who seemed the friendliest.

“There? That’s just the castle,” the girl said carelessly as she helped clean off the table.

“Castle? Castle as knights in shining armor? That kinda castle?” Buffy replied in astonishment.

“Yeah, it’s got a beach and everything,” Fred replied calmly, handing a book to a very attractive demon that had been eyeing her for months. She blushed at the bold look in his eyes, and hurried away in blushing confusion.

Buffy stood, her mouth opened to ask another question. “Well, that was rude,” she muttered to herself. She eyed the elevator with a thoughtful gleam in her eye.

“Wonder what they’re keeping up there?” Dawn sidled up to Buffy, a sly look in her eyes. There was a soft insinuation in her voice, as if there was some terrible secret contained in the castle.

“Hmmm,” Buffy said distractedly, still staring at the oblong metal cage, curiosity eating at her. Coming to an abrupt decision, she cast a quick look over her shoulder. Good! No one was watching. And using all her Slayer stealth and speed she dashed to the elevator. Her hand was on the gate when a massive darkness stirred within.

Letting out a shriek, she jumped back as a truly HUGE creature stepped out, blocking her ingress.

At her loud scream, everyone jerked their attention towards her. Without undue haste, Jahna stepped out of the elevator, her face a contained mask of cool urbanity.

“May I help you?” she stated with calm, blinking politely down at the tiny human. Not by a flicker of her eyes did she give the impression that she wanted to crush the insignificant creature beneath her boot.

Besides, she had a feeling Lord Xander would get upset, which would make Master Angel very, VERY annoyed.

“Whoa…” Buffy stood gape-jawed at the enormous woman. “Damn, what the hell are they feeding you guys, SuperGrowth Hormones?” she muttered in dumb amazement. She shook her astonishment off, and gave the woman her best smile. “I’m Buffy, a friend of Xander and Angel’s. I just wanted to take a peek at the upstairs. You know how us girls are,” she winked at the large female.

“No…I do not,” Jahna replied repressively. She inhaled, and several men held their breath, praying fervently that her bustier would give under the pressure. To their vast disappointment it held. “Unless accompanied by Master Angel or Lord Xander, I’m afraid I cannot permit you to proceed any further.”

“Cordy and Ethan were up there,” Buffy protested, her face flushing with beginning temper.

“They have rooms,” Jahna retorted forebodingly, cocking a brow at the human. “You do not.” Her eyes held a cool and haughty look of disdain.

“Fine…” the other girl gritted out. “I’ll just ask Angel or Xander!”

Jahna shrugged dismissively. Buffy huffed in anger and flounced away. She was determined to see what was up there. However, by the time she got back to the group, both Xander and Angel had vanished.

The Shadow Queen ground her teeth, cursing in silent, frustrated rage at the lost opportunity. The fact that her prey had temporarily escaped her grasp caused the Other to snicker with laughter. She lashed a stinging blow to the girl. Coldly satisfied at the abrupt painful silence that took the place of the malicious laughter.

She had to get out of this damn body! Trying to squeeze the little energy being out of her mortal shell was costing her more than she anticipated. Like Willow, the girl was far too strong-willed. Normally she enjoyed crushing and corrupting stubborn and intractable souls. She had never failed to lead them down the path of debauchery; however, there was something about these damn Hellmouth children! It was costing her more than she ever anticipated. It was as if they had been specially bred to be resistant and nothing she could do would make them take that final step.

And this foolish child was even worse than Willow! Maybe it was because the girl wasn’t all the way human, she thought sourly, but she had a feeling it would take her more years than the human had to achieve her ends. The only way she could hope to triumph was by killing the little bitch! It wasn’t exactly a win, but she would take whatever victory she could get her hands on.

//Dawn sagged in relief, near tears at her sudden victory. She gazed proudly down at her multitude of soldiers, the valiant defenders of her soul. There were dozens of battle-scarred warriors. All bearing some likeness to Xander, Buffy, Spike and Willow. A couple of them were amalgamation of her friends. Tall men with blazing red or blonde hair and small tough women with dark hair.

There were even some Anyas and Taras.

They had sprung into being the instant she found herself under attack. The most the Shadow Queen could do was force her into this fortress. Nothing the Shadow Queen did could penetrate her defenses. The Xanders, with their Wil E. Coyote-like minds, had so many tricky and deadly schemes; her Willows with maelstrom of magic crackling at their fingertips and her Spikes and Buffys with their terrifying strength and aggression.

And then there was Giles. There was only one of him and he pulled all the different defenses and wards together.

Dawn sneered. The Shadow Queen and her minions couldn’t touch her. They could kill her, but her soul would remain free of corruption. And that was all that mattered. She was the sister of a Slayer, and she knew her duty.

The young girl turned away from the window and headed towards the center of her fortress. The closer she got to her core, the more energy she could feel suffusing her. Energizing her. A white light pulsed softly, washing over her as she rounded the last corner.

Unlike the others when they had been possessed, she had been aware of everything that happened outside her body, but powerless to do anything but hide inside. Maybe it had something to do with what Glory had sought, what the Shadow Queen had tried to use to breach the barriers between the worlds, Dawn mused as she glided to the large pulsing orb. She knew what the Shadow Queen planned, for Xander and for the world. Dawn picked up the glowing orb and stared into it with intense eyes. Then a slow smile crossed her face and she laughed, spinning around in delight.

That bitch was going down!//


By the time it was time to say goodbye, Buffy had forgotten about taking a tour of Xander’s new home. She was hurt but tried to hide it when Xander didn’t hug her or any of them goodbye. She could throw a fit, but all that would do would be to embarrass her and everybody else. She would give him time…then she was coming back with guns blazing and dammit, he was gonna hug her!

Giles on the other hand had a vaguely satisfied look on his face each time he glanced in Ethan’s direction. Their talk downstairs, while it didn’t progress as far as he would like, at least it was a start. He would dearly love to see his old comrade back in his life. Perhaps if he could mend things between them, long forgotten feelings would return, he thought hopefully. But there was so much pain, so many mistakes he had made along the way that gaining a toehold in his former companion’s life would be an uphill battle.

He gazed once more at Ethan’s coolly still face before facing forward, his face determined.

It would be worth it.


Later that night, after everyone had retired to their rooms Angel found Xander out on the balcony.

“Take a walk with me,” he softly urged his quiet, troubled lover. Gathering a blanket, they set off. The round full moon, the balmy beach…it was a night for lovers. And it was lost on them.

They walked along the beach in complete silence. The soft tread of their feet on the sand merely one more sound added to the backdrop of the night.

“I’m sorry…” Xander blurted out, unable to take much more of the silence. It was shredding his nerves.

Angel raised his brows, a look of puzzled concern on his face. He heard the note of distress in Xander’s voice and a stressed Xander made for a very uncomfortable night of tossing and turning. He stopped to peer at his mate. “Sorry? Sorry about what? Xander, what are you talking about?” he asked with assumed calm.

Xander twisted his hands anxiously as he raised a distraught face to his mate. “For not talking to you before…before all this,” he said miserably.

Angel sighed, understanding dawning in his eyes. He spread the blanket on the sand and helped Xander sit. Sitting down himself, he paused, weighing his words before he spoke.

“Ciallan…we both knew when we took on the role of Guardian and Defender, that there would be sacrifices,” he began carefully. He tugged the boy into his arms, and rocked the distressed youth gently. “We have more than enough time to start a family, remember? Every fifty years, we’ll both become fertile.” Xander’s miserable expression deepened, so Angel changed directions.

“Thousands of couples lose children to needless and incomprehensible reasons. Sometimes, it just not meant to be,” he said quietly, a note of sorrow in his voice. “At least we know we will be losing our children for a purpose. It doesn’t make it right, but at least I think maybe I’ll be able to sleep at night.”

“But you wanted…” Xander began to say, his eyes filling with incipient tears.

“Shhhh, baby,” Angel said softly. He laid a finger across the boy’s trembling lips. “What I want or wanted is immaterial. We both have a duty; and it supersedes everything that we know. We protect. We serve.”

Xander nestled closer, just needing the comfort of Angel’s solid body against his. He thought hard on what his lover said, before reluctantly nodding. “I hate when you’re right,” he muttered, sniffling back his tears.

He released a shuddering sigh, as a cool caressing hand stroked his back. Pushing away, he lay down and simply gazed up at the stars. Allowing their cold, serene beauty to seep into his troubled soul. Struggling to accept this soooo UNFAIR situation they were in.

After a minute, Angel reclined on the blanket as well. He gazed at Xander’s profile and determinedly pushed his grief and pain in the back ground. Slowly a tiny smile curved his lips as he watched the boy.

“They look so close,” the young man murmured, staring up at the shimmering, glittering stars. They shone so brightly away from the harsh lights of the city. Like diamonds, he thought. “Beautiful…” he sighed, a wistful note in his voice. The stars, they were so far away and icily cold. The way he wished he could be.

“Hmmmm,” Angel murmured in agreement staring down at his mate. “Beautiful indeed…” he said in a low, husky voice.

Xander blinked at the vampire’s tone, abruptly returning back to earth. He looked at Angel, a startled look in his eyes. His cheeks grew hot at the heat evident in his mate’s warm, caressing gaze. “I’m not beautiful,” he protested, looking away in confusion. “’Sides, I’m as big as a house.” He plucked irritably at his huge shirt; fervently wishing that he was able to fit into some of the clothes Cordy had bought him.

“If I say you’re beautiful, you’re beautiful,” Angel retorted calmly, sneaking in a kiss on the upturned nose. “Or are you calling me a liar?” he added with a hint of laughter in his voice.

Xander peeked up at him, a smile trembling on his lips. “Welllll,” he drawled out slowly. “I wouldn’t exactly call you a liar. A stretcher of the truth, maybe, but never a liar!”

“Little brat…” Angel laughed fondly and swooped down to steal another, longer kiss. And a searing heat explode in the vicinity of his groin. He pulled back, his eyes questioning. Smiling at the answer he saw in the boy’s sparkling gaze.

Without a word spoken he helped Xander remove his clothing, before slowly removing his own. Then pulling the boy closer to him, he simply kissed those delightfully sweet lips, his own hunger and need growing, keeping pace with his mate. There were times in the past few months that he felt he could be satisfied with just laying in bed, and kissing Xander breathless. The boy was a wanton angel, and made the most erotic sounds imaginable.

With a low, earthy growl, he became the conductor of a one-man orchestra entitled: Mo Ciallan.


An hour later, they rested on the blanket. Their limbs quivering in the after effects of spent passion. Keeping his movements unhurried and tender, Angel had taken Xander to a slow and gentle climb to the pinnacle of ecstasy. Stroking soothingly, delicately inside his boy as they made love. The moon and stars the only witness to this sweet, poignant moment.

Replete, Angel idly strummed his hand up and down Xander’s flank, just enjoying the warm, tingling pulsations that washed over him. He found a certain vague amusement at the sound of his laboring lungs. As if he really needed to breathe.

The harsh rasp of their breathing was lost in the sound of the tide as it surged in a frothing wave up the sandy shore, several feet from their tangled limbs. The soft breeze, a cooling balm to Xander’s overheated, sated flesh, blew lightly across them. Gentling the exhausted lovers to a state of drowsy repose.

Angel pulled his boy closer, as if to shield Xander from further pain. He buried his face in a warm, sweaty neck, leaving his hand buried between his lover’s thighs. Softly caressing the wet flesh, enjoying the minute spasms from Xander’s changed, moisture drenched entrance. Though he did miss playing with his boy’s hefty cock.

Slowly his mood darkened.

His body was at peace, his mind and soul heavy with grief. It was strange, he mused to himself, how he and Xander, once rivals for Buffy’s affections, found themselves now yoked together. Once again he found himself marveling at Xander’s inner strength. But, he wondered, would this sacrifice be Xander’s breaking point? How much more could the boy take without buckling?

What he had to do, what they had to do would test their strength as nothing else would. He nuzzled aside Xander’s sweat-laden hair and kissed the boy softly behind his ear. Curling protectively around his dark-haired lover, he wanted this moment of tranquility to last forever.

But it couldn’t…wouldn’t. Tomorrow would come as inevitable as the tide.

He drew his hand from between Xander’s moist thighs and rested both his hands on his lover’s stomach.

Xander blinked, gradually coming down off his high. His chest rose and fell, his heart frantic beat slowing. He sighed, settling himself fully against Angel’s body, feeling as boneless as a snake. Though he was pretty sure snakes had bones. He kinda remember seeing some show on the Discovery Channel. His hands came up and caressed Angel’s hair roughed forearms idly. Angel made him feel so good. It was weird but he actually felt smart around the vampire.

When he became pregnant, sure he ranted and raved around like an escapee from a loonybin, hell, what man wouldn’t freak out? But during the months as he swelled, something changed between them. Like some kinda fence or wall came down between him and Angel. Actually, maybe it would be more truthful to say that he finally took the blinders off his eyes. When you start lying to yourself, that’s when you really knew you were in trouble, he thought wryly.

For the first time, he actually saw Angel, the Angel that Buffy swore existed. A vampire that his stubborn nature had screamed just didn’t exist. He finally saw the old brooding, cryptic uttering Sunnydale Angel for what the vampire had been…a poor, pathetic loser, a guilt-ridden demon trying to atone for the sins of someone else. Angel, with so little going for him, tried to take on the world of evil single-handedly. Buffy had them and a Watcher at her back, what did Angel have?

It would have been only a matter of time before Angel went up against some demon bigger and tougher than a mere vampire. And considering just how many demons there were out there, it was a foregone conclusion how that would have went down.

He wasn’t stupid enough to believe Angel was Mr. Goody-Two-Shoes. He wasn’t that Buffyfied. But then again, he was exactly the good little friend that Buffy once believed him to be either. He had his dark moments; he was human…at least he hoped he still was.

If anyone really dared to look under the surface, none of them were really the lily white knights in shining armor they pretended to be. Buffy, Giles…Xander swallowed hard…

Willow.

But Angel, despite all his demony instincts, struggled to do the right thing.

The scales off his eyes, he was able to see what Buffy saw in Angel. And his feelings changed, shifted as he looked at his vampire mate with fresh eyes.

This new feeling he had…it wasn’t love, at least not yet. For that matter, he wasn’t too sure that he would ever BE in love with Angel. But this…this…Bond thingie between them screwed with his mind. It was so demanding, so engrossing that it was getting increasingly difficult to tell what he felt for Angel.

Respect, that was a given, now that he had a chance to walk in Angel’s shoes a bit. Liking…that was definitely part of what he felt. Maybe it was an extreme form of fondness that he felt.

Yeah, that was it…he and Angel were friends.

Angel stirred, stretching his limbs against Xander. “C’mon baby,” he said at last. “We need to get back home.”

The young man mutely shook his head and tried to burrow into the blanket. “Don’t wanna,” he retorted childishly, his lip thrust out in a pout. If he went back, bad things were going to happen and he wanted to enjoy the peacefulness while he could.

Angel sat up easily. Looking down at his mate, he leaned down and pressed a gentle kiss on Xander’s frowning face. “I know…” he whispered, a look of understanding in his eyes when the boy twisted to look up at him. “I know, ciallan,” he said softly. “But I’ll be here…and so will the others.” Carefully he stroked Xander’s tumbled locks from the boy’s face.

Xander lowered his eyes, instinctively leaning into the comforting touch. “I know, but…” he bit his lip. “I just…wished we could stay down here forever,” he whispered, a look of pain on his face. “Down here, it feels like nothing bad or ugly could exist or hurt us.”

Giving way to Angel’s silent insistence, Xander linked his arms around the vampire’s neck, allowing his lover to draw him to his feet. He rested his bulk against his mate, turning into Angel’s touch with the vampire kissed his temple and rubbed soothing circle on his back.

“I know…” came the gentle response.