Devil's In The Details

Prologue:
Xander stared at the dark fake leather that seemed to stare back at him on the bus. He felt so silent in the back of the bus compared to the chaos in the front. People were bleeding, people were trying to live, starting to die and he just couldn’t get up. Willow, Giles, Andrew, Faith, and Dawn were flying all around the front trying to help. She was gone, she was gone, he kept hearing in his head over and over again.
The words wouldn’t stop. They wouldn’t leave his head, he looked out the window, they were still in the desert, she always liked the desert. She loved the silence of it; the first time she had gone was with him on a camping trip. She said no wonder people come out here to find themselves, because it feels like no one else was there. Plus she liked the warmth of the day and the cold of the night, that meant the she and him could snuggle closer together in the sleeping bag. A rush of images flew through his mind, her kisses, her hugs, the way that she looked in his eyes when they made love. He felt his insides cauterize as he thought, he could actually feel his heart grow colder.
He put his hand to his mouth to keep from crying out. He looked up and Buffy was looking at him, with tears in her eyes.
“Are you ok?” Buffy asked and Xander looked at her for a moment, he willed every part of himself to nod, but instead he shook his head. She sat down next to him.
“Aren’t you going to cry?” She asked him as he sighed.
“Men don’t cry.” He said and he felt stupid the moment he said it.
“Really?”
“No.” He said simply and she wiped the tears from her face.
“He didn’t believe me.” She told him and Xander continued to stare into space.
“Does it matter?”
“No.” She answered and tears fell from her face again.
“But it’s good that you let him know.” Xander said and Buffy leaned her head on Xander’s shoulder. “He deserved to know.”
He told her, she felt the tears coming to her face again as she thought of him gone.
“Can I stay here a while?” Buffy knew if she could just continue to breathe in and out she could keep from drowning in sorrow.
“I just want to rest my eyes for a minute.” She told him and she tried to close her eyes but they were red and painful. She willed herself to close her eyes, even though she saw his smiling face when she closed them. He was waiting for her, in her sleep, waiting for her to go to him. She felt herself slowly slipping away, safe, as Xander anchored her.
Xander warmed to Buffy next to him, she was something he could take care of, something that took his mind off the fact that she was gone. She was the only person he saw in all the blackness around him. Keep focusing on her; Xander told himself, Buffy will keep you here. Keep you awake; keep you from thinking about her. Buffy anchored him. But he realized he hadn’t said anything in response to her.
“Sure.” Xander told her and he looked over at her and saw that she was asleep.
Buffy looked at Spike and he smiled at her, she ran his hand lightly over her cheek.
“Miss me yet pet?” He asked her and she nodded her head.
“I’ll be waiting for you.” He told her.
“Don’t leave me.” She whispered and he shook his head.
“Never.” He told her as she felt him pull away into the blackness.